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Well I went on my ride along yesterday. It seems as the job will fit me very nicely. I can only find one draw back and that is the time I would be done. I got home around 8:30. Of course my A and 15 yr old had an argument before I was home and the 15 yr old called my cell phone. On my way home I called my A and talked about his argument with the youngest, he admited he was wrong with how he handled it and how he talked to him. He wanted me to talk to my youngest about how he had acted, my youngest had lost his temper and yelled and cursed. I explained that me getting into the middle of this was not fair to me that I was gone for 3 months and they worked things out without me here, why is it different now. He was pretty insistant that I talk to the youngest. I just said..."I will be home in 5 or 10 minutes, good bye" When I arrived home they both were talking it out WITHOUT ME!!!! Yeah!!!!
The job will change the family dynamics some. But it would be a 4 day week. I am going to do a pro vs con list. I know the pros will out weigh the cons because the long hours is truely the only draw back that I can see. I also will ask my HP to lead me.
Hugs Mary
Update: I called the hiring manager and said I would like the job, so now will wait for his phone call back....wish me luck
I am so glad for you. Sounds like a great oportunity. Even with long hours, there are great benifits to having 3 day weekends. Which ever you decide I am sure will be best for you.
Way to go not getting in the middle and allowing him to be an adult. I think that is great and a wonderful example.
Take care of you!
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"Good judgement comes from experience... experience comes from bad judgement" - unknown
Congratulations on your job!!! That is wonderful, a 4 day work week, that would be just fine. Yes, I see your point about coming home at that time, but yes, ask your HP to guide you and you are safe.
It is good that your A and your son are dealing with things, and that you can allow him to be responsible. Stepping back is so hard, and you are doing it with really no choice. I have hope and prayers for you and your family.
You are nicer though...I would turn my phone totally off while I was at work, I don't like interruptions.
Still...as soon as I get off work I turned on my phone and quite often I had messages from home. I HATE being the referee!
Of course in my situation it was not my husband calling, but my daughter. He would be drunk and acting like a drunken idiot and a total jerk and my daughter would be in tears calling me for emotional support. SHEESH! I kept telling her time and time again that she needs to stop pretending that things are normal. That she needs to stay away from him when I am not home. Sad sad sad...but necessary.
Husband enjoys putting on his stupid videos and drinking until he passes out. He SELDOM says anything to anyone. Problems start when my daughter tries to talk to him about school, or when she is just being NORMAL, a sick person can't be normal so he acts like an idiot.
Being drunk he won't shut up and keeps her standing for hours while he lectures her about all that is wrong with her...sigh.
She is finally starting to get it. I tell her when I was at work to stay in her room and sleep or listen to music with headphones, in other words STAY OUT OF HIS WAY.
She tried, but could not give up the fantasy that things MIGHT be normal if she was nice and loving. SIGH! She keeps trying to talk to him about school, try to get him to go shopping for ingredients to make a nice dinner she will cook for us all, or play a game with her and whatch something with her, ANYTHING to try and distract him from drinking.
I know it is hard to work worrying about your kids with a drunk at home, the meltdowns and raging arguments drunks can start...throw a teen into that mix and you can have a five alarm fire!
((((Mary)))) I hope you get the job and things work out.
You might try turning your phone totally off at work. If it is THAT much of an emergency, then they probably should call an ambulance or fire department. I would think they can handle anything else. Suggest your son try to avoid any and all interaction with his Dad when you are not home to referee. That sounds abnormal...but a raging drunk parent is already abnormal...so really you are just adapting.
