Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

BatonRougian · BatonRougian

Im just looking for some reality from those of you who left the true love of your life because of the hurt and mistrust of active drug/alcohol addiction. How long before you didnt feel so attatched? How long before you felt like you werent in love anymore? Whats the process like? I know I have to move on bu...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Lord give me grace to slow down my pace, for you said you would walk with me~not race!:) thanks Jozie:)

nala · nala

My boyfriend and I separated 4 months ago, he left me after having had an emotional affair and deciding he wanted to quit drinking. He thought he could only do it alone, and alone he is, he has moved into the mountains, cut off his phone, etc. He has not been to a meeting. Now he has been sober a month and we...

Helpless-Hopeless · Helpless-Hopeless

I am currently living in a relationship that has gotten much worse over the past few years due to alcholism. Of course, I am the only one who thinks he has a problem. He continually denies it and yet I am always the one left feeling angry, hurt, helpless, hopeless. I need help and support.

Jerry F · Jerry F

and I'm hoping that this time someone takes home my "blamer". This tool hasn't ever worked since I got into Al-Anon and I've not been able to get rid of it either. I picked it up today and tried to use it and it still wouldn't work. When I tried to put in back in the back of the tool cabinet it didn...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Just this morning my copy of "News & Views" (The monthly magazine of the Al-Anon Family Group in the UK and Eire), dropped through my letter box, and in it was this little gem: Thought for the month Let not my thinking become confused by listening to too many opinions, but let me consider...

Jozie · Jozie

I just wanted to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MS. SHELLYJ123 :O) Love & Prayers for a Wonderful Day... :o-) Jozie

lizzakiss · lizzakiss

I just need someone to reel me in off this ledge. In my head I know I can no longer stay with my Abf I'm just waiting for my heart to catch up. He's NEVER going to change. He is always going to do what he can to manipulate situations, always stay selfish and put me through hell. At the end of an argument I feel...

SerenityGirl · SerenityGirl

Hi all--I found a percocet (my A does use pills too) and while I keep to myself about the alcohol, I am not sure what to do about this...any thoughts. I found it on the floor...put it back? Throw it out? Hand it to him? Take it myself and wash it down with a shot (j/k). Anyway, I'm not by any stretch tortured b...

BostonFern · BostonFern

I have a lot of emotional pain and I thought it would be good for me to find a sponsor to work on it. A woman in a meeting said her strength is compassion and empathy, so I asked her to be a sponsor to work out my pain. I didn't really know her that well. We had one hour of phone conversation. During the con...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

HI everyone! I am doing OK today--just want to check in! Life is good; don't take it for granted & keep the faith always or you might end up like I did right after I joined Alanon. Now I can see where I went wrong but it still gets me. Even after 24 years, I am still remember & sometimes relive my past...

SheWolf · SheWolf

I am finding myself in quite a position. My A has been home now for almost a week, after being gone for 4 months (3 months in treatment). It is so uncomfortable in the house. I tend to be sensitive to negative energy, and you could slice the tension in the air. I have been continuing to try to do my own thing...

Suzi1965 · Suzi1965

I read something in todays Courage to Change that really struck me, and I wanted to share it with yall and hopefully any newcomers because I have found it to be so true. on page 33/Feb. 2nd it says (in part): When I came to Al-Anon, I found alot of people who had decided to climb down from their ladders into a...

Tracy · Tracy

Something I have noticed the more I focus on me my life , my problems and hand everyone else over to HP the better my life becomes. My problems are I can not stand to see people in pain or struggling with problems. But we have to struggle sometimes to learn.. All the pain I have been through has lead to me com...

smartkat · smartkat

I am looking for something to spark a conversation with my nieces. Their mother is the alcholic but the father is just as dysfunctional.

brightmommy · brightmommy

I am going through a divorce. He has cheated multiple times on me throughout our marriage. Now that we are separated he accuses me of cheating anytime I leave comments on a facebook page of the opposite sex. How can I stop reacting to his actions. I say rotten things that I normally would not say when...

Jellybean1707 · Jellybean1707

hi, i posted a topic earlier in the week called 'somewhere to vent'. my mum had gone off the rails once again and had nearly killed herself. However since that day she's been sober, she tells me she really scared herself and desn't want t put us through it anymore and eventhough its only been 3 days i want t...

smartkat · smartkat

I'm not talking about slogans in the book. I am talking about things like "Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror!"

jasobel · jasobel

I have so much going on at once in my life- I am overwhelmed with grief. My ex A boyfriend who left me 3 months ago for another woman pops in and out of my life; my good friend is of dying of cancer; my ex-husband isn't paying support, and the list goes on and on. I feel like I am drowning in a sea of emotions and f...

jasobel · jasobel

My friend is in AA and recovery and has been unemployed since 2/09. He is in school which ends in two weeks. However he is divorced and pays a hefty part of his unemployment to his ex-wife. He has been alternating between living with his parents and living with a girlfriend who is not a good friend in recov...

roxygirl · roxygirl

My son is mean and rotten to the core! I hate to sound so mean but, it's true! He has no respect for me and I'm the one who has always been there for him. We had this hugh blowout argument with name calling and swearing at each other! I'm to the point to where I don't care anymore about him and his selfish dis...

SheWolf · SheWolf

Thank you all for you kinds words which i have received, especially in my last post. I think I really didn't understand what being "powerless" and "unmanageable" really meant until I read your responses. I have read about it, listened to it at my f2f meetings, but didn't rea...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Cannot sleep. Touch deprivation. It is so hard to live with. I talk and talk to hp to no avail for years. Miss a man in my life so much. Am much better about the grieving my family etc. Am ok most the time with this aloness. My heart hurts, can tell I am aging. You know how people don't live as long if hey do not ha...

intothewoods · intothewoods

Hey, MIP family! Need to vent a little tonight about the Limbo that is my life. I'm still 90% sure that I'm leaving my AH husband in May, after I finish my Bachelor's degree. Living with him is hard because we both know that our marriage is falling apart. We had a vague sort of conversation today about the s...

ally · ally

Guys I've been trying to get into the chatroom via mirc and cannot remember how to add the chatroom. Can anyone help. Regards Ally xx

Jellybean1707 · Jellybean1707

Hi, This is probably going to end up more likey life story than a vent but i swear if i don't get this out my head is literally going to explode!!! I got a call from my alcoholic mother this morning because today would have been my dad's 56 birthday and a year since his death...understandably she was really...

SheWolf · SheWolf

I am having difficulty determining if i am really accepting of Step 1, or if I am having trouble trusting my own instincts. I have self-esteem issues, and trying to understand my own emotions can be trying some times. I think I believe that my life has become unmanageable; having to take over everythi...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

Today my AH and I went to church with my father-in-law. While we were over at his house, my AH went into the kitchen and I heard one of the cabinets open. As I walked into the kitchen, I saw him shoving something in his pocket. I asked him what it was and he said, "I didn't put anything in my pocket.&q...

Wolfie · Wolfie

Earlier tonight, during the meeting I touched upon the topic of love. I told a condensed version of this story. It was too long to share in the meeting so I thought I would post it here. When I fell in love with Nancy, I forgot to ask her if she had children. Well, she had told me she was married twice before an...

Codependent · Codependent

The A calls and texts me periodically. It is so interesting. Because he will text and I will text back, etc. Then it is like he will stop without answering the last question I asked. Just no response. I let it go. But, it always bothers me- does he think I annoy him with questions, etc? My self-doub...

Jerry F · Jerry F

to ask that the family list the names (or family status) of those who have or are suffering from the disease of alcoholism for the purpose of taking these names to our HP and asking for intervention and special consideration. Here are a few of mine; Bob, James, Todd, Tanya, Troy, Teresa, Phil, R...

Suzannah · Suzannah

...and I shared it with my daughter. It does not matter what it was about as what does matter is this. For some reason I really felt it important to share however, I did not know why and what would come out of it. It was playing on my mind and I could not make sense of it. Now these things normally do not both...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good evening MIP friends. I sit here, and again - have a heavy heart. My heart is heavy from guilt ... which I know I should not feel but I do and it's so real. I also ache in my heart as my ASon is back in treatment. Why - oh - why does this disease make lovely people into such monsters? I LOVE my son but I HATE...

Codependent · Codependent

Tomorrow is my birthday. Gotta cold and dont' feel well. Supposed to snow. Haven't called the A since he asked for money and he asked contacted me. Just kinda down.

grammie · grammie

Grammie here, there is a drunk in the chat room and we cant kick him cause there is no op here. thanks in advance love in recovery, grammie

hotblackink · hotblackink

Hello. I'm new here. I am angry at the moment - but as you all probably know, tomorrow will be completely different (at least for a few hours here or there). And I am paranoid about what to tell you all to call me because I was subconsciously raised to be paranoid. Which does come in handy when I do crazy thin...

Gailey · Gailey

My son has one on his truck for a dui. His truck is old and some of the lights on his running board don't go out right away. It is an electrical problem that he really doesn't have the money to get fixed. Anyway...a lot of the time he has to jump start it with mine or hubby's car. The battery finally died and wou...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

My AH and I have been once again separated and now in the process of getting either a legal separation or divorce. His drivers license has been suspended for a year. Therefore, when I need something from him, such as copies of documents, I must drive out to where he now lives : in the country with his sin...

babysteps · babysteps

I need to have a short pity party or I won't be able to get on with my day/life. My AH and I are separated and not speaking. We are trying to figure out our divorce settlement, but that is made difficult by his refusal to communicate. He hasn't paid any child support, I don't know if I will get to keep my house,...

miss lucy · miss lucy

i have had just the greatest day!!! i just want to shout from the roof tops but i live in a mobile home so i will shout here instead..... the car passed its MOT without needing any work doing on it - 12 months hassle free motoring!!!!!! my dog lucy learnt to Sit and Wait at a gate today and i performed a two dog S...

tea2 · tea2

The Chair opened the Meeting with "The Serenity Prayer" First Item: Approval of December Meeting Minutes -Vote was held and the Minutes were approved as posted on Message Board. Next Item: Review of Op meeting schedule -The current OP Meeting Schedule is as follows: AMMon. - Shimo/N...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Lately I am finding that life is not that easy: what a concept, huh? Some days I feel that I am coasting through life until I see my doctor. Not that it was all bad news but it was very disturbing & frustrating. I won't go into details but I am very uncomfortable. Also, just when I think I've got it lick...

Rocky38 · Rocky38

Hello MIP family, At last I have a reliable way to access and post to this forum. Maybe HP was telling me to take time out and focus on me? Many of you know that hubby passed away a few weeks ago. We are still in the middle of the grieving "process". At first the idea of a process scared me - does...

lizzakiss · lizzakiss

I am so sick of my ex-Abf going on about suicide. how he has a plan. He went to a meeting yesterday and his mood was very good, more positive, calmer...like he was when I first met him and he was diligently working his program. It made me want to share with him things I have been learning in my recovery, ma...

Haleyb12 · Haleyb12

My daughter is 15 and last spring took my car in the middle of the night after drinking with a bunch of boys-- she was very drunk and ended up being arrested for DUI (she does not have her drivers license) She recently went to court for this incident. The day before her court date she was caught at school s...

ARG... justice for Alanon Members · ARSK

So I keep reading about people who go to treatment and find a sense of inner peace, and a solid chance to get on their feet with support. This applies to those in substance as well as emotional issues. SO I start looking around for a center that might have an out patient or in patient based service for Emo...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hey MIP Family - Over the past few years, as my Son's addiction has progressed, I have been unable to look at family and baby photos. We repainted the largest areas of our home 3-4 years ago, and never put the photos back up. We've got some in other areas of the home and I do my best to avert my glaze. The pho...

Rora · Rora

I was reading the post linked to the Times Article "Our Mother's Drinking was Wrecking us".... and I thought, "even if they're not drinking, they can still wreck (us)" My exaH insists on caring for our 5 yr old child on Tuesdays. Before he goes for work on afternoons exaH bring...

KRS · KRS

I am new to this forum and am new to Al-Anon so please help me find a way to work through this initial sharing. My daughter is my "A" and has been been living with us for the last 4 years on and off between rehab and sober living....she has been home for the last 3 months and finds every opportunity...

Suzannah · Suzannah

It may be the sickness that is responsible for this, they do say that Shingles brings on depression, or it may be a turn of events that simply brings my brain back to a negative point; I don't really understand. So, why have I once again found myself travelling the lonely path of self destruction by simpl...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

My current job is a very emotionally abusive environment. I realize the need to remain there for the financial benefits - obviously- so I try to endure what I can but, day by day it becomes harder for me to remain the passive individual I am required to be in order NOT to make waves in my company. I know I've...

Maria123 · Maria123

Can anyone share their experience and knowledge of 13 stepping? I thought I understood it but am not sure any more. It seems to be a common theme I am seeing in Alanon and I have such mixed thoughts about it. I lost my sponsor (understandably so) because she and her husband whom she met in Alanon broke up...

Jozie · Jozie

Anxiety N Me... This is something I have Fought dang near, All My Life... I remember growing up, and I went from a lit. Farm Girl, up till age 9 that is.... When My parents would fight before we left, I remember being scared to death to Move when i was in bed & could hear them screaming at each other, Most...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I was listening to another person sharing their recovery and perspective and they commented on the practice of loving with detachment which caused me to be hooked on the realization that I had always heard and had come to learn and practice detachment with love. Detachment with love was the third an...

miss lucy · miss lucy

well......we have had a lovely day...shopping together, eating a meal, sitting talking, walking the dog....you know....nice, calm every day stuff. then he just couldnt resist spoiling it!!! We were talking about the impact of us splitting up. He said he missed me terribly,,,realised he had t...

meagain · meagain

I was going to start this new year - just starting to end the 'drama' in my life and look after me-this is my year-I am turning 60 and I so many health problems and need to get in shape and lose weight. But its sooo hard for me to try and look after me! I get so caught up in other peoples drama (family). For one th...

Codependent · Codependent

So the A sent me a picture of a sunrise on the ocean this morning- his view- with the caption "Have a great day!" While this should have been nice, it only irritated me that while I was running his child to school and late for a morning meeting at work, he was watching the sunrise on the beach con...

blender_girl · blender_girl

Thanks to all who replied to my post both publicly and privately. All of your responses had a common theme which ultimately reinforces the lesson I've been having to keep learning lately - I simply can't expect rational behavior from an active A. I will not be confronting him with his unacceptable b...

pineapple · pineapple

OK, I will say that my life has gotten calmer now that I'm learning to take care of ME. I'm beginning to wonder how well I can really do that with Ah in my life. In the past year I've thought numerous times of telling him he has to leave. But we cannot afford two households, we're barely making it holding one...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

For those of you who have been following... my position is that I have put my daughter and her much older boyfriend in a position of getting married or him going to jail. They chose to get married and I was going to allow this. Since that time there have been unbelievable obstacles thrown out by his pare...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Ever Left the Love of Your Life? (Preview) Im just looking for some reality from those of you who left the true love of your life because of the hurt and mistrust of active drug/alcohol addiction. How long before you didnt feel so attatched? How long before you felt like you werent in love anymore? Whats the process like? I know I have to move on bu...	BatonRougian	6	1445	Feb 4, 2010 by carolinagirl
	I abolutely LOVE this!~ it is me to a T! (Preview) Lord give me grace to slow down my pace, for you said you would walk with me~not race!:) thanks Jozie:)	shellyj123	4	886	Feb 3, 2010 by White Rabbit
	obsessive thinking... (Preview) My boyfriend and I separated 4 months ago, he left me after having had an emotional affair and deciding he wanted to quit drinking. He thought he could only do it alone, and alone he is, he has moved into the mountains, cut off his phone, etc. He has not been to a meeting. Now he has been sober a month and we...	nala	6	2240	Feb 3, 2010 by nala
	I am new to this site or any like it! (Preview) I am currently living in a relationship that has gotten much worse over the past few years due to alcholism. Of course, I am the only one who thinks he has a problem. He continually denies it and yet I am always the one left feeling angry, hurt, helpless, hopeless. I need help and support.	Helpless-Hopeless	12	938	Feb 3, 2010 by Helpless-Hopeless
	Gonna have another garage sale... (Preview) and I'm hoping that this time someone takes home my "blamer". This tool hasn't ever worked since I got into Al-Anon and I've not been able to get rid of it either. I picked it up today and tried to use it and it still wouldn't work. When I tried to put in back in the back of the tool cabinet it didn...	Jerry F	10	993	Feb 3, 2010 by Jerry F
	Sorting the wheat from the chaff.... (Preview) Just this morning my copy of "News & Views" (The monthly magazine of the Al-Anon Family Group in the UK and Eire), dropped through my letter box, and in it was this little gem: Thought for the month Let not my thinking become confused by listening to too many opinions, but let me consider...	Suzannah	1	825	Feb 3, 2010 by pineapple
	Birthday Wishes... (Preview) I just wanted to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MS. SHELLYJ123 :O) Love & Prayers for a Wonderful Day... :o-) Jozie	Jozie	7	854	Feb 3, 2010 by shellyj123
	Help me please! (Preview) I just need someone to reel me in off this ledge. In my head I know I can no longer stay with my Abf I'm just waiting for my heart to catch up. He's NEVER going to change. He is always going to do what he can to manipulate situations, always stay selfish and put me through hell. At the end of an argument I feel...	lizzakiss	6	801	Feb 3, 2010 by ythannah
	Found a pill...what should I do? (Preview) Hi all--I found a percocet (my A does use pills too) and while I keep to myself about the alcohol, I am not sure what to do about this...any thoughts. I found it on the floor...put it back? Throw it out? Hand it to him? Take it myself and wash it down with a shot (j/k). Anyway, I'm not by any stretch tortured b...	SerenityGirl	9	1031	Feb 3, 2010 by blender_girl
	Deeply wounded by a sponsor (Preview) I have a lot of emotional pain and I thought it would be good for me to find a sponsor to work on it. A woman in a meeting said her strength is compassion and empathy, so I asked her to be a sponsor to work out my pain. I didn't really know her that well. We had one hour of phone conversation. During the con...	BostonFern	17	1304	Feb 3, 2010 by carolinagirl
	JUST WANT TO SAY HI! (Preview) HI everyone! I am doing OK today--just want to check in! Life is good; don't take it for granted & keep the faith always or you might end up like I did right after I joined Alanon. Now I can see where I went wrong but it still gets me. Even after 24 years, I am still remember & sometimes relive my past...	Hoot Nanny	3	645	Feb 2, 2010 by Jerry F
	I don't have a sponsor yet...I need some help...please respond (Preview) I am finding myself in quite a position. My A has been home now for almost a week, after being gone for 4 months (3 months in treatment). It is so uncomfortable in the house. I tend to be sensitive to negative energy, and you could slice the tension in the air. I have been continuing to try to do my own thing...	SheWolf	7	816	Feb 2, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Something I wanted to share with you... (Preview) I read something in todays Courage to Change that really struck me, and I wanted to share it with yall and hopefully any newcomers because I have found it to be so true. on page 33/Feb. 2nd it says (in part): When I came to Al-Anon, I found alot of people who had decided to climb down from their ladders into a...	Suzi1965	4	979	Feb 2, 2010 by White Rabbit
	focusing on me. (Preview) Something I have noticed the more I focus on me my life , my problems and hand everyone else over to HP the better my life becomes. My problems are I can not stand to see people in pain or struggling with problems. But we have to struggle sometimes to learn.. All the pain I have been through has lead to me com...	Tracy	1	612	Feb 2, 2010 by Suzi1965
	Can you think of any moviies that have a "moral" that would be helpful in illustrating a 12 principle? (Preview) I am looking for something to spark a conversation with my nieces. Their mother is the alcholic but the father is just as dysfunctional.	smartkat	11	1166	Feb 2, 2010 by Hoot Nanny
	how do i stop reacting (Preview) I am going through a divorce. He has cheated multiple times on me throughout our marriage. Now that we are separated he accuses me of cheating anytime I leave comments on a facebook page of the opposite sex. How can I stop reacting to his actions. I say rotten things that I normally would not say when...	brightmommy	8	998	Feb 2, 2010 by glad lee
	dare i believe it? (Preview) hi, i posted a topic earlier in the week called 'somewhere to vent'. my mum had gone off the rails once again and had nearly killed herself. However since that day she's been sober, she tells me she really scared herself and desn't want t put us through it anymore and eventhough its only been 3 days i want t...	Jellybean1707	5	861	Feb 2, 2010 by abbyal
	What are you favorite PERSONAL slogans? (Preview) I'm not talking about slogans in the book. I am talking about things like "Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror!"	smartkat	16	1189	Feb 2, 2010 by Rita G
	desperate for relief - don't know how to find peace (Preview) I have so much going on at once in my life- I am overwhelmed with grief. My ex A boyfriend who left me 3 months ago for another woman pops in and out of my life; my good friend is of dying of cancer; my ex-husband isn't paying support, and the list goes on and on. I feel like I am drowning in a sea of emotions and f...	jasobel	7	960	Feb 2, 2010 by Tracy
	Need help/ideas for recovering AA friend (Preview) My friend is in AA and recovery and has been unemployed since 2/09. He is in school which ends in two weeks. However he is divorced and pays a hefty part of his unemployment to his ex-wife. He has been alternating between living with his parents and living with a girlfriend who is not a good friend in recov...	jasobel	4	908	Feb 2, 2010 by Tracy
	I CAN'T STAND MY SON & HIS ALCOHOLISM! (Preview) My son is mean and rotten to the core! I hate to sound so mean but, it's true! He has no respect for me and I'm the one who has always been there for him. We had this hugh blowout argument with name calling and swearing at each other! I'm to the point to where I don't care anymore about him and his selfish dis...	roxygirl	7	973	Feb 2, 2010 by Diva
	Thank you! (Preview) Thank you all for you kinds words which i have received, especially in my last post. I think I really didn't understand what being "powerless" and "unmanageable" really meant until I read your responses. I have read about it, listened to it at my f2f meetings, but didn't rea...	SheWolf	4	809	Feb 2, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Same O obstacle (Preview) Cannot sleep. Touch deprivation. It is so hard to live with. I talk and talk to hp to no avail for years. Miss a man in my life so much. Am much better about the grieving my family etc. Am ok most the time with this aloness. My heart hurts, can tell I am aging. You know how people don't live as long if hey do not ha...	Debilyn	4	641	Feb 1, 2010 by search41
	An Update from Limbo (Preview) Hey, MIP family! Need to vent a little tonight about the Limbo that is my life. I'm still 90% sure that I'm leaving my AH husband in May, after I finish my Bachelor's degree. Living with him is hard because we both know that our marriage is falling apart. We had a vague sort of conversation today about the s...	intothewoods	3	887	Feb 1, 2010 by Iamhere
	Chatroom (Preview) Guys I've been trying to get into the chatroom via mirc and cannot remember how to add the chatroom. Can anyone help. Regards Ally xx	ally	2	650	Feb 1, 2010 by ally
	Somewhere to vent (Preview) Hi, This is probably going to end up more likey life story than a vent but i swear if i don't get this out my head is literally going to explode!!! I got a call from my alcoholic mother this morning because today would have been my dad's 56 birthday and a year since his death...understandably she was really...	Jellybean1707	5	1849	Feb 1, 2010 by Ness
	How does it feel when you know you are past Step 1? (Preview) I am having difficulty determining if i am really accepting of Step 1, or if I am having trouble trusting my own instincts. I have self-esteem issues, and trying to understand my own emotions can be trying some times. I think I believe that my life has become unmanageable; having to take over everythi...	SheWolf	8	940	Feb 1, 2010 by SheWolf
	Staying in today (Preview) Today my AH and I went to church with my father-in-law. While we were over at his house, my AH went into the kitchen and I heard one of the cabinets open. As I walked into the kitchen, I saw him shoving something in his pocket. I asked him what it was and he said, "I didn't put anything in my pocket.&q...	White Rabbit	6	855	Feb 1, 2010 by blender_girl
	Wolf Medicine (Preview) Earlier tonight, during the meeting I touched upon the topic of love. I told a condensed version of this story. It was too long to share in the meeting so I thought I would post it here. When I fell in love with Nancy, I forgot to ask her if she had children. Well, she had told me she was married twice before an...	Wolfie	8	966	Feb 1, 2010 by Wolfie
	Feedback (Preview) The A calls and texts me periodically. It is so interesting. Because he will text and I will text back, etc. Then it is like he will stop without answering the last question I asked. Just no response. I let it go. But, it always bothers me- does he think I annoy him with questions, etc? My self-doub...	Codependent	1	636	Feb 1, 2010 by Festfan
	Its time again... (Preview) to ask that the family list the names (or family status) of those who have or are suffering from the disease of alcoholism for the purpose of taking these names to our HP and asking for intervention and special consideration. Here are a few of mine; Bob, James, Todd, Tanya, Troy, Teresa, Phil, R...	Jerry F	17	1319	Feb 1, 2010 by Jerry F
	I had a dream... (Preview) ...and I shared it with my daughter. It does not matter what it was about as what does matter is this. For some reason I really felt it important to share however, I did not know why and what would come out of it. It was playing on my mind and I could not make sense of it. Now these things normally do not both...	Suzannah	2	841	Feb 1, 2010 by Jerry F
	I LOVE my SON - I HATE this disease (Preview) Good evening MIP friends. I sit here, and again - have a heavy heart. My heart is heavy from guilt ... which I know I should not feel but I do and it's so real. I also ache in my heart as my ASon is back in treatment. Why - oh - why does this disease make lovely people into such monsters? I LOVE my son but I HATE...	Iamhere	10	1034	Jan 31, 2010 by Iamhere
	Down tonight (Preview) Tomorrow is my birthday. Gotta cold and dont' feel well. Supposed to snow. Haven't called the A since he asked for money and he asked contacted me. Just kinda down.	Codependent	11	1117	Jan 31, 2010 by Festfan
	op needed in the chat room..asap please (Preview) Grammie here, there is a drunk in the chat room and we cant kick him cause there is no op here. thanks in advance love in recovery, grammie	grammie	4	904	Jan 31, 2010 by kitty
	New here. You're gonna get a mouthful. (Preview) Hello. I'm new here. I am angry at the moment - but as you all probably know, tomorrow will be completely different (at least for a few hours here or there). And I am paranoid about what to tell you all to call me because I was subconsciously raised to be paranoid. Which does come in handy when I do crazy thin...	hotblackink	8	1043	Jan 31, 2010 by maresie
	INTERLOCKING BREATHALYZER (Preview) My son has one on his truck for a dui. His truck is old and some of the lights on his running board don't go out right away. It is an electrical problem that he really doesn't have the money to get fixed. Anyway...a lot of the time he has to jump start it with mine or hubby's car. The battery finally died and wou...	Gailey	1	1289	Jan 31, 2010 by Charlie
	Wanted to "rescue" but didn't (Preview) My AH and I have been once again separated and now in the process of getting either a legal separation or divorce. His drivers license has been suspended for a year. Therefore, when I need something from him, such as copies of documents, I must drive out to where he now lives : in the country with his sin...	GailMichelle	6	1035	Jan 31, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Pity party (Preview) I need to have a short pity party or I won't be able to get on with my day/life. My AH and I are separated and not speaking. We are trying to figure out our divorce settlement, but that is made difficult by his refusal to communicate. He hasn't paid any child support, I don't know if I will get to keep my house,...	babysteps	3	833	Jan 31, 2010 by Iamhere
	what a great day!!!!! (Preview) i have had just the greatest day!!! i just want to shout from the roof tops but i live in a mobile home so i will shout here instead..... the car passed its MOT without needing any work doing on it - 12 months hassle free motoring!!!!!! my dog lucy learnt to Sit and Wait at a gate today and i performed a two dog S...	miss lucy	4	877	Jan 31, 2010 by Jerry F
	1.3.10 MIP Chat Room Group Business Meeting Minutes (Preview) The Chair opened the Meeting with "The Serenity Prayer" First Item: Approval of December Meeting Minutes -Vote was held and the Minutes were approved as posted on Message Board. Next Item: Review of Op meeting schedule -The current OP Meeting Schedule is as follows: AMMon. - Shimo/N...	tea2	0	810	Jan 30, 2010 by tea2
	SO...IT IS NOT THAT EASY! (Preview) Lately I am finding that life is not that easy: what a concept, huh? Some days I feel that I am coasting through life until I see my doctor. Not that it was all bad news but it was very disturbing & frustrating. I won't go into details but I am very uncomfortable. Also, just when I think I've got it lick...	Hoot Nanny	3	914	Jan 30, 2010 by Jerry F
	Update on my family (Preview) Hello MIP family, At last I have a reliable way to access and post to this forum. Maybe HP was telling me to take time out and focus on me? Many of you know that hubby passed away a few weeks ago. We are still in the middle of the grieving "process". At first the idea of a process scared me - does...	Rocky38	7	909	Jan 30, 2010 by maresie
	suicide (Preview) I am so sick of my ex-Abf going on about suicide. how he has a plan. He went to a meeting yesterday and his mood was very good, more positive, calmer...like he was when I first met him and he was diligently working his program. It made me want to share with him things I have been learning in my recovery, ma...	lizzakiss	7	1065	Jan 30, 2010 by maresie
	calling the police on your child (Preview) My daughter is 15 and last spring took my car in the middle of the night after drinking with a bunch of boys-- she was very drunk and ended up being arrested for DUI (she does not have her drivers license) She recently went to court for this incident. The day before her court date she was caught at school s...	Haleyb12	11	2871	Jan 30, 2010 by Haleyb12
	ARG... justice for Alanon Members (Preview) So I keep reading about people who go to treatment and find a sense of inner peace, and a solid chance to get on their feet with support. This applies to those in substance as well as emotional issues. SO I start looking around for a center that might have an out patient or in patient based service for Emo...	ARSK	5	901	Jan 30, 2010 by Haleyb12
	Emotional Triggers - Family/Baby Photos...Need some ESH (Preview) Hey MIP Family - Over the past few years, as my Son's addiction has progressed, I have been unable to look at family and baby photos. We repainted the largest areas of our home 3-4 years ago, and never put the photos back up. We've got some in other areas of the home and I do my best to avert my glaze. The pho...	Iamhere	6	1454	Jan 30, 2010 by Iamhere
	I need some ESH please.... (Preview) I was reading the post linked to the Times Article "Our Mother's Drinking was Wrecking us".... and I thought, "even if they're not drinking, they can still wreck (us)" My exaH insists on caring for our 5 yr old child on Tuesdays. Before he goes for work on afternoons exaH bring...	Rora	9	1110	Jan 30, 2010 by Rora
	Don't know where to turn (Preview) I am new to this forum and am new to Al-Anon so please help me find a way to work through this initial sharing. My daughter is my "A" and has been been living with us for the last 4 years on and off between rehab and sober living....she has been home for the last 3 months and finds every opportunity...	KRS	6	882	Jan 29, 2010 by Rocky38
	That old demon rears his head once more... (Preview) It may be the sickness that is responsible for this, they do say that Shingles brings on depression, or it may be a turn of events that simply brings my brain back to a negative point; I don't really understand. So, why have I once again found myself travelling the lonely path of self destruction by simpl...	Suzannah	5	967	Jan 29, 2010 by glad lee
	Believing in Myself (Preview) My current job is a very emotionally abusive environment. I realize the need to remain there for the financial benefits - obviously- so I try to endure what I can but, day by day it becomes harder for me to remain the passive individual I am required to be in order NOT to make waves in my company. I know I've...	RunnerChick	6	652	Jan 29, 2010 by Iamhere
	13 Stepping (Preview) Can anyone share their experience and knowledge of 13 stepping? I thought I understood it but am not sure any more. It seems to be a common theme I am seeing in Alanon and I have such mixed thoughts about it. I lost my sponsor (understandably so) because she and her husband whom she met in Alanon broke up...	Maria123	10	5517	Jan 29, 2010 by idontknow
	Anxiety N Me...Hard reality... (Preview) Anxiety N Me... This is something I have Fought dang near, All My Life... I remember growing up, and I went from a lit. Farm Girl, up till age 9 that is.... When My parents would fight before we left, I remember being scared to death to Move when i was in bed & could hear them screaming at each other, Most...	Jozie	3	1019	Jan 29, 2010 by ARSK
	A thoughtful twist on a recovery lesson (Preview) I was listening to another person sharing their recovery and perspective and they commented on the practice of loving with detachment which caused me to be hooked on the realization that I had always heard and had come to learn and practice detachment with love. Detachment with love was the third an...	Jerry F	7	1066	Jan 29, 2010 by Andrea12
	AH gave me an ultimatum!!! (Preview) well......we have had a lovely day...shopping together, eating a meal, sitting talking, walking the dog....you know....nice, calm every day stuff. then he just couldnt resist spoiling it!!! We were talking about the impact of us splitting up. He said he missed me terribly,,,realised he had t...	miss lucy	6	1063	Jan 29, 2010 by blender_girl
	A 'New' Year (Preview) I was going to start this new year - just starting to end the 'drama' in my life and look after me-this is my year-I am turning 60 and I so many health problems and need to get in shape and lose weight. But its sooo hard for me to try and look after me! I get so caught up in other peoples drama (family). For one th...	meagain	3	913	Jan 29, 2010 by RunnerChick
	More resentment.... (Preview) So the A sent me a picture of a sunrise on the ocean this morning- his view- with the caption "Have a great day!" While this should have been nice, it only irritated me that while I was running his child to school and late for a morning meeting at work, he was watching the sunrise on the beach con...	Codependent	10	1034	Jan 29, 2010 by BatonRougian
	Feeling Better today (Preview) Thanks to all who replied to my post both publicly and privately. All of your responses had a common theme which ultimately reinforces the lesson I've been having to keep learning lately - I simply can't expect rational behavior from an active A. I will not be confronting him with his unacceptable b...	blender_girl	3	683	Jan 28, 2010 by Rocky38
	dont know how much more I can take (Preview) OK, I will say that my life has gotten calmer now that I'm learning to take care of ME. I'm beginning to wonder how well I can really do that with Ah in my life. In the past year I've thought numerous times of telling him he has to leave. But we cannot afford two households, we're barely making it holding one...	pineapple	3	880	Jan 28, 2010 by Rocky38
	Today is a new day (Preview) For those of you who have been following... my position is that I have put my daughter and her much older boyfriend in a position of getting married or him going to jail. They chose to get married and I was going to allow this. Since that time there have been unbelievable obstacles thrown out by his pare...	carolinagirl	7	723	Jan 28, 2010 by Tenderheartsks
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.