Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Dear MIP family - and you are very dear to me. I am struggling at the moment with a very sick AH who is not eating - I can get my hand round his upper arm - and has a very damaged liver, gastric tract, etc.(for those who don't know - I have been married to AH for 39 years + and he has been alcohol dependant for the la...

maresie · maresie

One of my housemates has started dating her boss. They always did have an intense relationship. There were a lot of lines blurred in there. I feel uncomfortable because of course all my relationships (and most of them disasters) were started at warp speed. If someone wanted to date, get to know me...

danielle0516 · danielle0516

So my mom comes over today to drop off some flowers. She starts talking about random stuff then the conversations turns to how she feels as a result of me not telling her what's going on in my life and, in particular, how I'm not sharing with her what I do and do not tell my daughter about what's going on with...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I'm not kidding when I say that my grass is 4 feet tall in some places around my yard - places I can't reach with the riding mower. When I walk around my yard I fight dispair because its SO much work - every single step around the yard shows me things I have to try to get done. I used to have a handle on it, before I...

surfingmaestro · surfingmaestro

Hi Everyone, I feel better when I post here, much the same way I feel better when I share at a meeting. So right now I'm writing just to make the fingers do something and get the gobidilgluck out of my head. As I have shared before, my wife is 12 months sober from alcohol and benzos this coming Wednesday. ...

tommyecat · tommyecat

.......read a sign in a local state park..... D O N O T F E E D T H E A N I M A L S ...You will DESTROY their natural instinct for survival The sign reminds me of myself before I walked into the rooms of Alanon. Enabling, doing for others rather than myself, covering up lies, protecting loved ones fr...

member922 · member922

So I haven't spoken with the ABF in almost 2 wks. We have decided on a 1 month break. I am wishing that he would contact me at least to say hi. Just general conversation. I know I don't want him to and I appreciate his respect of the boundary. I am doing so well without him, not looking for emails from him s...

JustJill · JustJill

My fiance went to his moms to spend his weekend with his 11 year old son. They had usually came here, but since last weekend was a bad weekend of his drinking I asked him to please go there. I am tired of the drinking, the added flavoring, the need to drink to get work done. Actually I am just tired. He called l...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Tonight, my ex called me. He was down. He had a cold, so I wasn't certain if he meant he was down because he was physically ill. Then, he said that he was down because he lost his job, his house, and wife. That was the exact order. I've heard that for men the job is the hardest to loose. What does one say...

RLC · RLC

Sending you birthday wishes to Guatemala. I hope you have a great day, eat a lot of cake.........and don't get mad at me for telling the world. LOL. Happy Birthday HUGS, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Friday 20th of May 2011 02:26:38 AM

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

my a b/f thats what he will ever be untill i cut it off completely,i live in my own home me and my son i pay my own bills and take care of my 24 y/o son whom has several dr appt.due to severe sleep apnea and low oxygen levels he weighs 404 lbs,so yes ive got my hands full everythings in my name (thank gosh).so my a b...

oldergal · oldergal

Kinda confused about this, I am not sure what it means to have boundaries, but yet don't have expectations? Can anyone explain this. It seems to me if you have boundaries, these are like expectations....???

kitty5 · kitty5

I have a male friend who is an alcoholic. He is very nice but when he drinks which is all the time I just can't be there to see it or be part of it as I am an adult child of an alcoholic (deceased father) so it brings up horrific memories for me. I love my alcoholic friend as a brother and it kills me to see him se...

RLC · RLC

(((To MY MIP Family))) I posted Monday about a dear friend who was hit head on by a drunk driver early this past Sunday morning and was listed in critical condition. I would like to report that he is out of the woods and was taken out intensive care earlier today. I talked with him late this afternoon. He is...

lyn46 · lyn46

Well, I managed to get away from my AH. But he isn't leaving me alone. He keeps calling 100 times a day asking if I am going to commit to supporting him if he goes to a program. My thought is, been there done that. It didn't work. Then he threatens to leave the hospital he is at..(he checked himself into a phyc...

RLC · RLC

Some of you know I am in the ladies apparel wholesale business. I buy 90% of my apparel from one company. The owner and I have been the best of friends, more like brothers for 15 years. He is like family a wonderful carring man in his early 40's with a wife and two children. We value and respect each oth...

youfoundme · youfoundme

I am so glad I went. My bf had an interview yesterday and proceeded to drink into a black out afterwards...so around 5:30 we got home, ate and I left to take my son to karate and get me to the meeting. Around 7pm the meeting began. HE called me right at 7, my phone was off so I didn't hear it (thank the gods) a...

tendo · tendo

My girlfriend is an alcoholic and has been sober for a couple years now. I love her very, very much. Right now we're in a rocky place and she's going thru some stuff she won't even try explaining to me because it has to do with being an alcoholic. I don't know what's going on inside her head. Anyway, last nig...

Aimee · Aimee

Good morning! I would love to hear your experiences with step 7 (and I guess step 6 as well). When you did step 5 with your sponsor and then went into that prayer meditation time after when you " Humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings" what happened? Did it happen right away? Were you entire...

member922 · member922

So since taking the month of no contact with the abf (wk and a half so far), I have had 2 male friends that I haven't spoken to in awhile actually ask me to go to coffee or something. One of them even suggested dinner. They both acted really complimentary and happy to catch up. The one actually planned to g...

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

I first stumbled into the Al-Anon rooms in January. I'm new to the miracles the program can bring to my thinking. Last night, AH was... well, an alcoholic with all of the rights, responsibilities and privileges of that title. AH got angry and left. He was only gone about 45 minutes. Now, the miracl...

Debilyn · Debilyn

If you want to see the latest pictures you are welcome to go to my facebook under Debra Potter. hugs,deb

dragonflys · dragonflys

I am really having a hard time with something. I am not really sure how to explain but here goes. My husband has been pot free for just over a year. He has not worked since my daughter was born in late 2006. He started school before he went to rehab but had to drop his classes while in rehab. The past year he has...

JustWantToUnderstand · JustWantToUnderstand

I haven't been to alanon meetings before but recent events have pushed me to realize I need to talk with others who may be experiencing the same things I am. I have a dear friend who I've known for almost 20 years that was recently hospitalized because she couldn't stand up. She and I speak on the phone re...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Last night at a meeting, the topic was on listening. One member shared something that I never heard before. She said when she notices that she might be talking too much, she remembers the acronym WAIT. Some members in the know, laughed. But then newbies, me included, were perplexed. Then she e...

youfoundme · youfoundme

Didn't get to go to the meeting last night, but I am going to the one tonight. My bf drank again yesterday, into another blackout. He fell asleep after work, and I had to take my older son for his doctor appointment. So we did that and when we returned home, my bf was still asleep. I made supper and he cam...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I spent some time the past two days gathering up things for a yard sale, and in the midst of cleaning, I found my old God box (I have several)...I decided to stop the decluttering and gathering and read the notes in my God box from the past year and was amazed to find that everyone had been answered... i...

tommyecat · tommyecat

I have a scenerio for those of you that have been active in the Alanon/AA program awhile. There is a person in my homegroup that attended a few meetings of adult children in the late 60's. This person said they didnt have a sponsor, nor attended meetings of any kind on a regular basis. This member who...

atheos · atheos

...as I shared at my F2F meeting today, I am the kind of person who would start off a call to 911 with "I'm sorry to bother you, but my house is on fire"... I'm really not good at asking for things I need. Recently I posted here about asking a manager at work not to schedule me for overtime on a certa...

Dawny · Dawny

ok, so i have an earlier post that my A relased, but i didnt clarify what he relapsd on. He went to rehab for drinking and pain pills and what ever he could get his hands on. He didnt drink and he says he is really solid and wont ever drink, but a guy left out a line of speed, he says he ignored it for a long time......

Jozie · Jozie

Denial for me is HUGE .... I sit back and realized today after reading "Hope for Today" that I still Suffer Alot from Denial... I have learned to say.. "I'm Good, No Worries" when I am Dieing inside, I am good at Denying myself Happiness, & Joy alot of the times, because I Have n...

DadtoCandE · DadtoCandE

My wife maintains a group of friends that she has completely vilified me too. All the problems she was having at work or missing social engagements with these friends due to alcohol were attributed to the stress I was causing her. I started fantasizing about her step nine. Pretty funny actually...

Latinarose · Latinarose

My son's drug of choice is meth, he has just been released from prison for foolishness associated with poor decision making while under the influence. He is 39 YO he has been in and out of jail for over 25 years because of his continued use. Once again before his release I wrote that if he was to live with m...

tarmale · tarmale

Hi everyone. I have a friend who is 41 and has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. She grew up in an abusive household but is now married with children. At first her drinking was kind of social and we all did it. Now, however, it's to the point of her blacking out, losing her memory, driving d...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

I like the reading in One Day at a Time from yesterday. Part of it says: '"The hardest thing for me to learn,' said a member at an Al-Anon meeting, 'is to stop imagining that I can figure out why my husband acts the way he does. Automatically almost, I jump to conclusions about his activities and hi...

juliakessler · juliakessler

I know Im hiding but, i got him out and i don't want to see or talk to him because i know im not strong enough to say no to him, so, Im hiding, from him from the world, from everyonr and evrything, I feel like im just waiting for something to bad to happen but if i stick my head in the sand ill be ok for now i just want...

Rora · Rora

After a 2.5 yr separation, my exaH and I recently tried on a short reconciliation after his 3 months in rehab. I really thought a miracle had taken place. We were communicating. We were sifting through all the hurts, all the fear, all the damage. We were understanding of each others places. It was...

youfoundme · youfoundme

So I have been working really hard on my own, since I've only gotten to one meeting, I didn't get a sponsor yet. This board has helped and listening to other posts about how to handle things in the mean time until I get a sponsor. Anyway, a few days ago my bf drank, and I didn't react. Things remained calm...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

I thought I would share a story about how I got introduced to Al Anon and my wife got introduced to AA. It's only recently that I've reflected on this and all that happened and how it is so obvious that my higher power was in control, although I never would have guessed it at the time. About a year or so ago, my...

maddon · maddon

My father in law is an alcoholic and has been since my husband was a late teenager (after the mother died). he is now in his 70's. There are only two children one daughter and my husband. We now live beside the father. My sister in law lives away but takes responsibility for his shopping, his housekee...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Went to see family doctor with AH this am. He has had a week in hospital but began drinking again the minute he came out. At least he didn't try to tell her any lies about drinking although he did underestimate the quantity. She told him he is killing himself and asked if he wanted to die. He said no but perh...

Dawny · Dawny

Hello my friends! I need to talk.....my 5 mo sober A relasped last night. He didnt come home all night. i knew he was going to the studio to sing at night so i respected his space ad didnt call him to check up on him. He didnt call me either, which is never good but i thought he was respecting my space too....bu...

pineapple · pineapple

I've gotten pretty good at acceptance, and detachment. I no longer even talk to ah about his drinking. But this morning I did. He'd made a date with a friend to go into town this morning. He was walking & talking very slow, had trouble getting his arm in the sleeve of his shirt, etc. I said ¨I may be wro...

juliakessler · juliakessler

I am new, and living w/ my active A. boyfriend. My landlord has banned him from the property, and threatened to evict me if he's seen here. I want him to go he's drowning me, But, I also, love him and he has nowhere to go and no friends, he says I have to help him, everytime I tell him to go I'm afraid he'll sho...

AD1076 · AD1076

but he says no...if you were faced with the same situation in a relationship how did they finally see that they indeed had a problem? He was so angry and distant all of the time....that I moved out to give him space and hope he would relize what he was missing but I have heard that he will need to hit "ro...

member922 · member922

I haven't been for a few weeks and I always get nervous. I am confident that I will learn something and it's nice to be around good people who understand. Ahhh... life. It seems a lot scarier than it really is.

pvc1 · pvc1

Hi, Back when I was 23 with a newborn baby, I went to Al-non for the first time. I realized from that one meeting that I was either going to have to accept the fact that my husband at the time was an alcoholic and live with it, or not. Well I decided not. It was not something I could live with as a young wife....

Aimee · Aimee

I wish I could throw myself on the floor, kicking and sreaming, fists flying, tears and snot, the whole nine yards. Why do I have to be so grown-up all the time? I'm trying to do the right thing, and pray about it but sometimes I just want to have a good old fashioned hissy fit!!! Sometimes it really sucks to...

tommyecat · tommyecat

Funny how if one person is accused of being crazy, many of us would have a knee jerk reaction and say "No I Am Not!" Soon a fight ensues and the AH is out the door doing what they do best. It is just one way for an AH to take the focus off their behavior and deflect it to another person. That is part...

likemyheart · likemyheart

My dilemma - my ah has, for the last two weeks, been an a** - blasting me with hateful texts and horrible words, mean voicemails, arguements, goading me, taunting, etc. I found out he was drinking of course and, like all drinking bouts, his behavior follows a certain pattern of behavior. This morning,...

tommyecat · tommyecat

This is one of my favorite poems that I heard an Alanon speaker read as a closing to their story. I like to start my week uplifted. This poem helps to give me a different perspective on my "problems". If no one has told you they loved you today, I do. Enjoy! THE WEAVERMy Life is but a weavi...

Freya · Freya

Hi, I just wanted to get these feelings out so that I can get some feedback on them and let them go. I'm currently working on my 8th step. I can see clearly how my behaviour towards my partner and other people has been abusive, manipulative and controlling , and I've realised I don't want to behave that wa...

MAR2011 · MAR2011

If you didn't see my last post, my fiance and I have a 2 month old daughter. People have told us, "It's ok to let her cry sometimes." Yes, I know that but he takes it as every time. I have to ask him, "Could you pick her up? Could you make her a bottle? Could you give her the pacifier?" I ju...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I have shared that my dear son,35, is married to an A. It has been the usual progression of horror. Breaks my heart. I am and have been blessed by MIP members to know how to listen to him. I have shared so many Al Anon tools and truths with him all along. He would call so miserable. I would say I know how horrib...

atheos · atheos

I just sent my boss an email explaining that the time when he usually asks me to work overtime really doesn't fit my schedule well, and listing other times when overtime would fit better into my schedule. I'm worried that maybe I shouldn't have done that. The company exists to serve our customers, not o...

Engaged · Engaged

Hey everyone. I am a bit lost right now and I found this site. I am hoping that someone here will understand and can give me some insight. My fiance is a recovering addict/alcoholic. She is 2.5 years clean from drugs and just a little over a month for alcohol. She is really trying to get her life toget...

poohead · poohead

Hi, I'm new here. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been sober for almost 3 months now. I am so angry!! I have so much rage inside of me and I don't know why. I can't go through the day without yelling at my kids. I am so mad about everything. I want to feel better so bad. I feel like I'm pushing my family away...

mr5191 · mr5191

This is my second posting but this is something that has been on my mind. I have started the Al-Anon recovery program and already my life is improving. I am no longer living my AW's life and feeling happier. I know I have a long way to go but this is another testament to this program's success. However,...

MAR2011 · MAR2011

My fiance is an alcoholic, he has totalled 4 cars in 5 years (one of which was mine). He was an alcoholic way before I met him, he has been to rehab once (3 years ago) but made no use of what he learned there and skipped out early. We have a 2month old daughter that he leaves me alone with all night so he can drink...

lyn46 · lyn46

Hi everyone, I don't know if this is the place for this, but I have to vent. Its 1am and I was up to get a drink. I saw my husband's coat on the chair with the pocket all zipped up so I went inside. There I found a check with my name signed at the bottom and my supermarket checking card. He just did this to me a coupl...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Some ESH would be appreciated (Preview) Dear MIP family - and you are very dear to me. I am struggling at the moment with a very sick AH who is not eating - I can get my hand round his upper arm - and has a very damaged liver, gastric tract, etc.(for those who don't know - I have been married to AH for 39 years + and he has been alcohol dependant for the la...	Tattyhead	8	878	May 22, 2011 by maresie
	Rushing into relationships (Preview) One of my housemates has started dating her boss. They always did have an intense relationship. There were a lot of lines blurred in there. I feel uncomfortable because of course all my relationships (and most of them disasters) were started at warp speed. If someone wanted to date, get to know me...	maresie	9	1074	May 22, 2011 by maresie
	alcoholism really is a family disease... (Preview) So my mom comes over today to drop off some flowers. She starts talking about random stuff then the conversations turns to how she feels as a result of me not telling her what's going on in my life and, in particular, how I'm not sharing with her what I do and do not tell my daughter about what's going on with...	danielle0516	10	806	May 22, 2011 by danielle0516
	Battling the overwhelming (Preview) I'm not kidding when I say that my grass is 4 feet tall in some places around my yard - places I can't reach with the riding mower. When I walk around my yard I fight dispair because its SO much work - every single step around the yard shows me things I have to try to get done. I used to have a handle on it, before I...	likemyheart	16	985	May 22, 2011 by likemyheart
	Sad and Lonely Today (Preview) Hi Everyone, I feel better when I post here, much the same way I feel better when I share at a meeting. So right now I'm writing just to make the fingers do something and get the gobidilgluck out of my head. As I have shared before, my wife is 12 months sober from alcohol and benzos this coming Wednesday. ...	surfingmaestro	7	797	May 22, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Do Not Feed The Animals (Preview) .......read a sign in a local state park..... D O N O T F E E D T H E A N I M A L S ...You will DESTROY their natural instinct for survival The sign reminds me of myself before I walked into the rooms of Alanon. Enabling, doing for others rather than myself, covering up lies, protecting loved ones fr...	tommyecat	8	1326	May 22, 2011 by tommyecat
	Wavering - UGH (Preview) So I haven't spoken with the ABF in almost 2 wks. We have decided on a 1 month break. I am wishing that he would contact me at least to say hi. Just general conversation. I know I don't want him to and I appreciate his respect of the boundary. I am doing so well without him, not looking for emails from him s...	member922	21	1003	May 21, 2011 by flopadopilus
	a decision finally (Preview) My fiance went to his moms to spend his weekend with his 11 year old son. They had usually came here, but since last weekend was a bad weekend of his drinking I asked him to please go there. I am tired of the drinking, the added flavoring, the need to drink to get work done. Actually I am just tired. He called l...	JustJill	6	727	May 21, 2011 by maryjane
	How to Respond? (Preview) Tonight, my ex called me. He was down. He had a cold, so I wasn't certain if he meant he was down because he was physically ill. Then, he said that he was down because he lost his job, his house, and wife. That was the exact order. I've heard that for men the job is the hardest to loose. What does one say...	GailMichelle	9	993	May 21, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Hey Everyone...........Today Is Pineapple's Birthday !! (Preview) Sending you birthday wishes to Guatemala. I hope you have a great day, eat a lot of cake.........and don't get mad at me for telling the world. LOL. Happy Birthday HUGS, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Friday 20th of May 2011 02:26:38 AM	RLC	14	1486	May 21, 2011 by Tattyhead
	tough decisions (Preview) my a b/f thats what he will ever be untill i cut it off completely,i live in my own home me and my son i pay my own bills and take care of my 24 y/o son whom has several dr appt.due to severe sleep apnea and low oxygen levels he weighs 404 lbs,so yes ive got my hands full everythings in my name (thank gosh).so my a b...	pattyann1963	4	779	May 21, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Boundaries/Expectations (Preview) Kinda confused about this, I am not sure what it means to have boundaries, but yet don't have expectations? Can anyone explain this. It seems to me if you have boundaries, these are like expectations....???	oldergal	14	9943	May 21, 2011 by Otie
	new to Alanon - please need help re: trouble with alcoholic friend help (Preview) I have a male friend who is an alcoholic. He is very nice but when he drinks which is all the time I just can't be there to see it or be part of it as I am an adult child of an alcoholic (deceased father) so it brings up horrific memories for me. I love my alcoholic friend as a brother and it kills me to see him se...	kitty5	12	21679	May 21, 2011 by hotrod
	Up Date On My Friend - Thanks For Your Prayers (Preview) (((To MY MIP Family))) I posted Monday about a dear friend who was hit head on by a drunk driver early this past Sunday morning and was listed in critical condition. I would like to report that he is out of the woods and was taken out intensive care earlier today. I talked with him late this afternoon. He is...	RLC	12	859	May 21, 2011 by White Rabbit
	Round 1-Lyn (Preview) Well, I managed to get away from my AH. But he isn't leaving me alone. He keeps calling 100 times a day asking if I am going to commit to supporting him if he goes to a program. My thought is, been there done that. It didn't work. Then he threatens to leave the hospital he is at..(he checked himself into a phyc...	lyn46	10	856	May 20, 2011 by lyn46
	Our Lives Can Change In The Blink Of An Eye (Preview) Some of you know I am in the ladies apparel wholesale business. I buy 90% of my apparel from one company. The owner and I have been the best of friends, more like brothers for 15 years. He is like family a wonderful carring man in his early 40's with a wife and two children. We value and respect each oth...	RLC	18	1159	May 20, 2011 by danielle0516
	Got myself to the meeting room last night :) (Preview) I am so glad I went. My bf had an interview yesterday and proceeded to drink into a black out afterwards...so around 5:30 we got home, ate and I left to take my son to karate and get me to the meeting. Around 7pm the meeting began. HE called me right at 7, my phone was off so I didn't hear it (thank the gods) a...	youfoundme	9	928	May 20, 2011 by pinkchip
	someone please help- i don't know what to do (Preview) My girlfriend is an alcoholic and has been sober for a couple years now. I love her very, very much. Right now we're in a rocky place and she's going thru some stuff she won't even try explaining to me because it has to do with being an alcoholic. I don't know what's going on inside her head. Anyway, last nig...	tendo	9	1086	May 20, 2011 by abbyal
	Step 6&7 experiences (Preview) Good morning! I would love to hear your experiences with step 7 (and I guess step 6 as well). When you did step 5 with your sponsor and then went into that prayer meditation time after when you " Humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings" what happened? Did it happen right away? Were you entire...	Aimee	7	1323	May 20, 2011 by abbyal
	Starting to wonder what is wrong with ME (Preview) So since taking the month of no contact with the abf (wk and a half so far), I have had 2 male friends that I haven't spoken to in awhile actually ask me to go to coffee or something. One of them even suggested dinner. They both acted really complimentary and happy to catch up. The one actually planned to g...	member922	16	729	May 20, 2011 by member922
	Miracles (Preview) I first stumbled into the Al-Anon rooms in January. I'm new to the miracles the program can bring to my thinking. Last night, AH was... well, an alcoholic with all of the rights, responsibilities and privileges of that title. AH got angry and left. He was only gone about 45 minutes. Now, the miracl...	Very Very Tired	10	988	May 20, 2011 by Very Very Tired
	My facebook (Preview) If you want to see the latest pictures you are welcome to go to my facebook under Debra Potter. hugs,deb	Debilyn	7	894	May 20, 2011 by member922
	controlling and shoulding?? (Preview) I am really having a hard time with something. I am not really sure how to explain but here goes. My husband has been pot free for just over a year. He has not worked since my daughter was born in late 2006. He started school before he went to rehab but had to drop his classes while in rehab. The past year he has...	dragonflys	12	835	May 19, 2011 by tommyecat
	First time discussing my experiences..just want to understand (Preview) I haven't been to alanon meetings before but recent events have pushed me to realize I need to talk with others who may be experiencing the same things I am. I have a dear friend who I've known for almost 20 years that was recently hospitalized because she couldn't stand up. She and I speak on the phone re...	JustWantToUnderstand	7	969	May 19, 2011 by tommyecat
	For all us newbies . . . . . . . .WAIT (Preview) Last night at a meeting, the topic was on listening. One member shared something that I never heard before. She said when she notices that she might be talking too much, she remembers the acronym WAIT. Some members in the know, laughed. But then newbies, me included, were perplexed. Then she e...	GailMichelle	7	1192	May 19, 2011 by youfoundme
	Sad today (Preview) Didn't get to go to the meeting last night, but I am going to the one tonight. My bf drank again yesterday, into another blackout. He fell asleep after work, and I had to take my older son for his doctor appointment. So we did that and when we returned home, my bf was still asleep. I made supper and he cam...	youfoundme	13	1205	May 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Cleaning out my God box~and I thought He had bailed on me~WOW! (Preview) I spent some time the past two days gathering up things for a yard sale, and in the midst of cleaning, I found my old God box (I have several)...I decided to stop the decluttering and gathering and read the notes in my God box from the past year and was amazed to find that everyone had been answered... i...	shellyj123	8	1097	May 19, 2011 by shellyj123
	Birthday Chips (Preview) I have a scenerio for those of you that have been active in the Alanon/AA program awhile. There is a person in my homegroup that attended a few meetings of adult children in the late 60's. This person said they didnt have a sponsor, nor attended meetings of any kind on a regular basis. This member who...	tommyecat	6	4816	May 19, 2011 by Aloha
	Yay! Good news! (Preview) ...as I shared at my F2F meeting today, I am the kind of person who would start off a call to 911 with "I'm sorry to bother you, but my house is on fire"... I'm really not good at asking for things I need. Recently I posted here about asking a manager at work not to schedule me for overtime on a certa...	atheos	7	1002	May 18, 2011 by wp
	more that i dont understand....... (Preview) ok, so i have an earlier post that my A relased, but i didnt clarify what he relapsd on. He went to rehab for drinking and pain pills and what ever he could get his hands on. He didnt drink and he says he is really solid and wont ever drink, but a guy left out a line of speed, he says he ignored it for a long time......	Dawny	9	1196	May 18, 2011 by danielle0516
	D.e.n.i.a.l.... Didn't Even No I Am Lie'n.... (Preview) Denial for me is HUGE .... I sit back and realized today after reading "Hope for Today" that I still Suffer Alot from Denial... I have learned to say.. "I'm Good, No Worries" when I am Dieing inside, I am good at Denying myself Happiness, & Joy alot of the times, because I Have n...	Jozie	5	1431	May 18, 2011 by hotrod
	coincidental share (Preview) My wife maintains a group of friends that she has completely vilified me too. All the problems she was having at work or missing social engagements with these friends due to alcohol were attributed to the stress I was causing her. I started fantasizing about her step nine. Pretty funny actually...	DadtoCandE	6	914	May 18, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Relapse (Preview) My son's drug of choice is meth, he has just been released from prison for foolishness associated with poor decision making while under the influence. He is 39 YO he has been in and out of jail for over 25 years because of his continued use. Once again before his release I wrote that if he was to live with m...	Latinarose	4	1022	May 18, 2011 by Latinarose
	New but not sure if I want to be here. (Preview) Hi everyone. I have a friend who is 41 and has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. She grew up in an abusive household but is now married with children. At first her drinking was kind of social and we all did it. Now, however, it's to the point of her blacking out, losing her memory, driving d...	tarmale	7	504	May 18, 2011 by tommyecat
	Putting away my microscope (Preview) I like the reading in One Day at a Time from yesterday. Part of it says: '"The hardest thing for me to learn,' said a member at an Al-Anon meeting, 'is to stop imagining that I can figure out why my husband acts the way he does. Automatically almost, I jump to conclusions about his activities and hi...	White Rabbit	9	1346	May 18, 2011 by tommyecat
	Locked myself in my apartment, & took the phone off the hook (Preview) I know Im hiding but, i got him out and i don't want to see or talk to him because i know im not strong enough to say no to him, so, Im hiding, from him from the world, from everyonr and evrything, I feel like im just waiting for something to bad to happen but if i stick my head in the sand ill be ok for now i just want...	juliakessler	6	807	May 18, 2011 by Rora
	After a brief and fantastic reconciliation, things collapsed to new proportions... (Preview) After a 2.5 yr separation, my exaH and I recently tried on a short reconciliation after his 3 months in rehab. I really thought a miracle had taken place. We were communicating. We were sifting through all the hurts, all the fear, all the damage. We were understanding of each others places. It was...	Rora	11	815	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Just need some support today living with active alcoholism (Preview) So I have been working really hard on my own, since I've only gotten to one meeting, I didn't get a sponsor yet. This board has helped and listening to other posts about how to handle things in the mean time until I get a sponsor. Anyway, a few days ago my bf drank, and I didn't react. Things remained calm...	youfoundme	7	635	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Even in the darkest days, your higher power is there... (Preview) I thought I would share a story about how I got introduced to Al Anon and my wife got introduced to AA. It's only recently that I've reflected on this and all that happened and how it is so obvious that my higher power was in control, although I never would have guessed it at the time. About a year or so ago, my...	usedtobeanyer	5	698	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	not sure if i belong here (Preview) My father in law is an alcoholic and has been since my husband was a late teenager (after the mother died). he is now in his 70's. There are only two children one daughter and my husband. We now live beside the father. My sister in law lives away but takes responsibility for his shopping, his housekee...	maddon	6	735	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Feeling Down (Preview) Went to see family doctor with AH this am. He has had a week in hospital but began drinking again the minute he came out. At least he didn't try to tell her any lies about drinking although he did underestimate the quantity. She told him he is killing himself and asked if he wanted to die. He said no but perh...	Tattyhead	14	821	May 17, 2011 by Ness
	i dont know if i can do this.H (Preview) Hello my friends! I need to talk.....my 5 mo sober A relasped last night. He didnt come home all night. i knew he was going to the studio to sing at night so i respected his space ad didnt call him to check up on him. He didnt call me either, which is never good but i thought he was respecting my space too....bu...	Dawny	7	694	May 17, 2011 by youfoundme
	exchanging one drug for another (Preview) I've gotten pretty good at acceptance, and detachment. I no longer even talk to ah about his drinking. But this morning I did. He'd made a date with a friend to go into town this morning. He was walking & talking very slow, had trouble getting his arm in the sleeve of his shirt, etc. I said ¨I may be wro...	pineapple	6	751	May 17, 2011 by flopadopilus
	I feel trapped, how do I get free? (Preview) I am new, and living w/ my active A. boyfriend. My landlord has banned him from the property, and threatened to evict me if he's seen here. I want him to go he's drowning me, But, I also, love him and he has nowhere to go and no friends, he says I have to help him, everytime I tell him to go I'm afraid he'll sho...	juliakessler	6	812	May 17, 2011 by GailMichelle
	I am new here.....I am pretty sure he has a drinking problem (Preview) but he says no...if you were faced with the same situation in a relationship how did they finally see that they indeed had a problem? He was so angry and distant all of the time....that I moved out to give him space and hope he would relize what he was missing but I have heard that he will need to hit "ro...	AD1076	6	887	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Off to a meeting... (Preview) I haven't been for a few weeks and I always get nervous. I am confident that I will learn something and it's nice to be around good people who understand. Ahhh... life. It seems a lot scarier than it really is.	member922	7	546	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	My alcoholic ex husband and my 18 year old daughter and rehab (Preview) Hi, Back when I was 23 with a newborn baby, I went to Al-non for the first time. I realized from that one meeting that I was either going to have to accept the fact that my husband at the time was an alcoholic and live with it, or not. Well I decided not. It was not something I could live with as a young wife....	pvc1	11	876	May 17, 2011 by pvc1
	temper tantrum terrible-two style (Preview) I wish I could throw myself on the floor, kicking and sreaming, fists flying, tears and snot, the whole nine yards. Why do I have to be so grown-up all the time? I'm trying to do the right thing, and pray about it but sometimes I just want to have a good old fashioned hissy fit!!! Sometimes it really sucks to...	Aimee	9	1061	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	I'm not crazy, you are! (Preview) Funny how if one person is accused of being crazy, many of us would have a knee jerk reaction and say "No I Am Not!" Soon a fight ensues and the AH is out the door doing what they do best. It is just one way for an AH to take the focus off their behavior and deflect it to another person. That is part...	tommyecat	8	862	May 16, 2011 by likemyheart
	To help or not - what would you do? (Preview) My dilemma - my ah has, for the last two weeks, been an a** - blasting me with hateful texts and horrible words, mean voicemails, arguements, goading me, taunting, etc. I found out he was drinking of course and, like all drinking bouts, his behavior follows a certain pattern of behavior. This morning,...	likemyheart	6	827	May 16, 2011 by likemyheart
	The Weaver (Preview) This is one of my favorite poems that I heard an Alanon speaker read as a closing to their story. I like to start my week uplifted. This poem helps to give me a different perspective on my "problems". If no one has told you they loved you today, I do. Enjoy! THE WEAVERMy Life is but a weavi...	tommyecat	3	609	May 16, 2011 by Jerry F
	Struggling with my feelings about myself (Preview) Hi, I just wanted to get these feelings out so that I can get some feedback on them and let them go. I'm currently working on my 8th step. I can see clearly how my behaviour towards my partner and other people has been abusive, manipulative and controlling , and I've realised I don't want to behave that wa...	Freya	9	1070	May 16, 2011 by Freya
	I can't tell him he's done something wrong without a blow up... (Preview) If you didn't see my last post, my fiance and I have a 2 month old daughter. People have told us, "It's ok to let her cry sometimes." Yes, I know that but he takes it as every time. I have to ask him, "Could you pick her up? Could you make her a bottle? Could you give her the pacifier?" I ju...	MAR2011	6	629	May 16, 2011 by youfoundme
	Want to share this (Preview) I have shared that my dear son,35, is married to an A. It has been the usual progression of horror. Breaks my heart. I am and have been blessed by MIP members to know how to listen to him. I have shared so many Al Anon tools and truths with him all along. He would call so miserable. I would say I know how horrib...	Debilyn	3	522	May 16, 2011 by Debilyn
	Assertive, or pushy? (Preview) I just sent my boss an email explaining that the time when he usually asks me to work overtime really doesn't fit my schedule well, and listing other times when overtime would fit better into my schedule. I'm worried that maybe I shouldn't have done that. The company exists to serve our customers, not o...	atheos	7	1270	May 16, 2011 by Debilyn
	New and I'm trying to figure things out. (Preview) Hey everyone. I am a bit lost right now and I found this site. I am hoping that someone here will understand and can give me some insight. My fiance is a recovering addict/alcoholic. She is 2.5 years clean from drugs and just a little over a month for alcohol. She is really trying to get her life toget...	Engaged	6	1242	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	I need help (Preview) Hi, I'm new here. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been sober for almost 3 months now. I am so angry!! I have so much rage inside of me and I don't know why. I can't go through the day without yelling at my kids. I am so mad about everything. I want to feel better so bad. I feel like I'm pushing my family away...	poohead	7	627	May 16, 2011 by kitty
	newbie with difficult medical question (Preview) This is my second posting but this is something that has been on my mind. I have started the Al-Anon recovery program and already my life is improving. I am no longer living my AW's life and feeling happier. I know I have a long way to go but this is another testament to this program's success. However,...	mr5191	11	662	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	I'm new and thinking of going to a meeting... (Preview) My fiance is an alcoholic, he has totalled 4 cars in 5 years (one of which was mine). He was an alcoholic way before I met him, he has been to rehab once (3 years ago) but made no use of what he learned there and skipped out early. We have a 2month old daughter that he leaves me alone with all night so he can drink...	MAR2011	9	961	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	trouble (Preview) Hi everyone, I don't know if this is the place for this, but I have to vent. Its 1am and I was up to get a drink. I saw my husband's coat on the chair with the pocket all zipped up so I went inside. There I found a check with my name signed at the bottom and my supermarket checking card. He just did this to me a coupl...	lyn46	9	509	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.