Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

youfoundme · youfoundme

Didn't get to go to the meeting last night, but I am going to the one tonight. My bf drank again yesterday, into another blackout. He fell asleep after work, and I had to take my older son for his doctor appointment. So we did that and when we returned home, my bf was still asleep. I made supper and he cam...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I spent some time the past two days gathering up things for a yard sale, and in the midst of cleaning, I found my old God box (I have several)...I decided to stop the decluttering and gathering and read the notes in my God box from the past year and was amazed to find that everyone had been answered... i...

tommyecat · tommyecat

I have a scenerio for those of you that have been active in the Alanon/AA program awhile. There is a person in my homegroup that attended a few meetings of adult children in the late 60's. This person said they didnt have a sponsor, nor attended meetings of any kind on a regular basis. This member who...

atheos · atheos

...as I shared at my F2F meeting today, I am the kind of person who would start off a call to 911 with "I'm sorry to bother you, but my house is on fire"... I'm really not good at asking for things I need. Recently I posted here about asking a manager at work not to schedule me for overtime on a certa...

Dawny · Dawny

ok, so i have an earlier post that my A relased, but i didnt clarify what he relapsd on. He went to rehab for drinking and pain pills and what ever he could get his hands on. He didnt drink and he says he is really solid and wont ever drink, but a guy left out a line of speed, he says he ignored it for a long time......

Jozie · Jozie

Denial for me is HUGE .... I sit back and realized today after reading "Hope for Today" that I still Suffer Alot from Denial... I have learned to say.. "I'm Good, No Worries" when I am Dieing inside, I am good at Denying myself Happiness, & Joy alot of the times, because I Have n...

DadtoCandE · DadtoCandE

My wife maintains a group of friends that she has completely vilified me too. All the problems she was having at work or missing social engagements with these friends due to alcohol were attributed to the stress I was causing her. I started fantasizing about her step nine. Pretty funny actually...

Latinarose · Latinarose

My son's drug of choice is meth, he has just been released from prison for foolishness associated with poor decision making while under the influence. He is 39 YO he has been in and out of jail for over 25 years because of his continued use. Once again before his release I wrote that if he was to live with m...

tarmale · tarmale

Hi everyone. I have a friend who is 41 and has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. She grew up in an abusive household but is now married with children. At first her drinking was kind of social and we all did it. Now, however, it's to the point of her blacking out, losing her memory, driving d...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

I like the reading in One Day at a Time from yesterday. Part of it says: '"The hardest thing for me to learn,' said a member at an Al-Anon meeting, 'is to stop imagining that I can figure out why my husband acts the way he does. Automatically almost, I jump to conclusions about his activities and hi...

juliakessler · juliakessler

I know Im hiding but, i got him out and i don't want to see or talk to him because i know im not strong enough to say no to him, so, Im hiding, from him from the world, from everyonr and evrything, I feel like im just waiting for something to bad to happen but if i stick my head in the sand ill be ok for now i just want...

Rora · Rora

After a 2.5 yr separation, my exaH and I recently tried on a short reconciliation after his 3 months in rehab. I really thought a miracle had taken place. We were communicating. We were sifting through all the hurts, all the fear, all the damage. We were understanding of each others places. It was...

youfoundme · youfoundme

So I have been working really hard on my own, since I've only gotten to one meeting, I didn't get a sponsor yet. This board has helped and listening to other posts about how to handle things in the mean time until I get a sponsor. Anyway, a few days ago my bf drank, and I didn't react. Things remained calm...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

I thought I would share a story about how I got introduced to Al Anon and my wife got introduced to AA. It's only recently that I've reflected on this and all that happened and how it is so obvious that my higher power was in control, although I never would have guessed it at the time. About a year or so ago, my...

maddon · maddon

My father in law is an alcoholic and has been since my husband was a late teenager (after the mother died). he is now in his 70's. There are only two children one daughter and my husband. We now live beside the father. My sister in law lives away but takes responsibility for his shopping, his housekee...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Went to see family doctor with AH this am. He has had a week in hospital but began drinking again the minute he came out. At least he didn't try to tell her any lies about drinking although he did underestimate the quantity. She told him he is killing himself and asked if he wanted to die. He said no but perh...

Dawny · Dawny

Hello my friends! I need to talk.....my 5 mo sober A relasped last night. He didnt come home all night. i knew he was going to the studio to sing at night so i respected his space ad didnt call him to check up on him. He didnt call me either, which is never good but i thought he was respecting my space too....bu...

pineapple · pineapple

I've gotten pretty good at acceptance, and detachment. I no longer even talk to ah about his drinking. But this morning I did. He'd made a date with a friend to go into town this morning. He was walking & talking very slow, had trouble getting his arm in the sleeve of his shirt, etc. I said ¨I may be wro...

juliakessler · juliakessler

I am new, and living w/ my active A. boyfriend. My landlord has banned him from the property, and threatened to evict me if he's seen here. I want him to go he's drowning me, But, I also, love him and he has nowhere to go and no friends, he says I have to help him, everytime I tell him to go I'm afraid he'll sho...

AD1076 · AD1076

but he says no...if you were faced with the same situation in a relationship how did they finally see that they indeed had a problem? He was so angry and distant all of the time....that I moved out to give him space and hope he would relize what he was missing but I have heard that he will need to hit "ro...

member922 · member922

I haven't been for a few weeks and I always get nervous. I am confident that I will learn something and it's nice to be around good people who understand. Ahhh... life. It seems a lot scarier than it really is.

pvc1 · pvc1

Hi, Back when I was 23 with a newborn baby, I went to Al-non for the first time. I realized from that one meeting that I was either going to have to accept the fact that my husband at the time was an alcoholic and live with it, or not. Well I decided not. It was not something I could live with as a young wife....

Aimee · Aimee

I wish I could throw myself on the floor, kicking and sreaming, fists flying, tears and snot, the whole nine yards. Why do I have to be so grown-up all the time? I'm trying to do the right thing, and pray about it but sometimes I just want to have a good old fashioned hissy fit!!! Sometimes it really sucks to...

tommyecat · tommyecat

Funny how if one person is accused of being crazy, many of us would have a knee jerk reaction and say "No I Am Not!" Soon a fight ensues and the AH is out the door doing what they do best. It is just one way for an AH to take the focus off their behavior and deflect it to another person. That is part...

likemyheart · likemyheart

My dilemma - my ah has, for the last two weeks, been an a** - blasting me with hateful texts and horrible words, mean voicemails, arguements, goading me, taunting, etc. I found out he was drinking of course and, like all drinking bouts, his behavior follows a certain pattern of behavior. This morning,...

tommyecat · tommyecat

This is one of my favorite poems that I heard an Alanon speaker read as a closing to their story. I like to start my week uplifted. This poem helps to give me a different perspective on my "problems". If no one has told you they loved you today, I do. Enjoy! THE WEAVERMy Life is but a weavi...

Freya · Freya

Hi, I just wanted to get these feelings out so that I can get some feedback on them and let them go. I'm currently working on my 8th step. I can see clearly how my behaviour towards my partner and other people has been abusive, manipulative and controlling , and I've realised I don't want to behave that wa...

MAR2011 · MAR2011

If you didn't see my last post, my fiance and I have a 2 month old daughter. People have told us, "It's ok to let her cry sometimes." Yes, I know that but he takes it as every time. I have to ask him, "Could you pick her up? Could you make her a bottle? Could you give her the pacifier?" I ju...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I have shared that my dear son,35, is married to an A. It has been the usual progression of horror. Breaks my heart. I am and have been blessed by MIP members to know how to listen to him. I have shared so many Al Anon tools and truths with him all along. He would call so miserable. I would say I know how horrib...

atheos · atheos

I just sent my boss an email explaining that the time when he usually asks me to work overtime really doesn't fit my schedule well, and listing other times when overtime would fit better into my schedule. I'm worried that maybe I shouldn't have done that. The company exists to serve our customers, not o...

Engaged · Engaged

Hey everyone. I am a bit lost right now and I found this site. I am hoping that someone here will understand and can give me some insight. My fiance is a recovering addict/alcoholic. She is 2.5 years clean from drugs and just a little over a month for alcohol. She is really trying to get her life toget...

poohead · poohead

Hi, I'm new here. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been sober for almost 3 months now. I am so angry!! I have so much rage inside of me and I don't know why. I can't go through the day without yelling at my kids. I am so mad about everything. I want to feel better so bad. I feel like I'm pushing my family away...

mr5191 · mr5191

This is my second posting but this is something that has been on my mind. I have started the Al-Anon recovery program and already my life is improving. I am no longer living my AW's life and feeling happier. I know I have a long way to go but this is another testament to this program's success. However,...

MAR2011 · MAR2011

My fiance is an alcoholic, he has totalled 4 cars in 5 years (one of which was mine). He was an alcoholic way before I met him, he has been to rehab once (3 years ago) but made no use of what he learned there and skipped out early. We have a 2month old daughter that he leaves me alone with all night so he can drink...

lyn46 · lyn46

Hi everyone, I don't know if this is the place for this, but I have to vent. Its 1am and I was up to get a drink. I saw my husband's coat on the chair with the pocket all zipped up so I went inside. There I found a check with my name signed at the bottom and my supermarket checking card. He just did this to me a coupl...

surfingmaestro · surfingmaestro

Hi Everyone, I've been reading here for months, but this is my first post. I've been attending alanon meetings for almost 18 months and have been working the steps with a sponsor for about 6 months. My wife is two weeks shy of having one year's sobriety. She's in program, working the steps, and is gon...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Got a nudge to share the readings that I am choosing to find my personal meaning in today. "Meaning-centered people do not try to control the moment but instead live in it. ... By stepping into and living within the moment, we get some seperation from on perspective on time. By living in the mome...

suave75 · suave75

Time article about addiction. How it affects the BRAINhttp://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1640436,00.html-- Edited by suave75 on Sunday 15th of May 2011 02:19:36 PM

member922 · member922

So I have stayed the course not communicating with the abf. Spent last evening watching tv and pretty much relaxing. Today, my son has a tball game. Then no plans, as well as for tomorrow. I am very happy to have the drama of weekend fighting, out of my life for now. I was invited to a tentative coffee d...

tommyecat · tommyecat

This prayer was shared at my 8.30 AM meeting today. I thought it was good stuff so I am passing it on. Hope you all enjoy! PRAYER FOR THE NEW YEAR Father, Thou knowest I am growing older. Keep me from becoming talkative, and possessed with the idea that I must express myself on every subject. Release...

atheos · atheos

My face-to-face meeting divides into tables in separate rooms. One of the rooms has a storage closet. My table finished first, and as I was leaving, a man who is not in Al-Anon asked me to go into the room with the storage closet (where people were still meeting) and get something for him (I think he wante...

Tracy · Tracy

I have not seen my sober ABF for a month, we have had one or two conversations but not much contact as I had hit my rock bottom and he was also feeling weak in his recovery, he has been sober for 8an a half months he was sober six months las time. he came to my sons 18th on friday we were very civil we acted normal...

lyn46 · lyn46

Hi everyone, So I told my AH that I would be moving out. Naturally he cried and carrried on. The next day at church he had this break-through revelation about how he needs to change his life. The day after that he confessed to me what he had been doing wrong as far as his shady addictive behavior goes. (I al...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I see the word relapse used a lot. In my thinking, relapse is what happens when you are truly working a program and trying to be straight and sober but something happens to drag you back down. My AH has not been sober mixed with relapses in my opinion - when he is not drinking he is doing so to prove to me that h...

Toricross · Toricross

I am angry not sure if it's at my self or him. Hate is all I feel can't express this to him because he is happy to be sober n it's 2 mths sober n he is on step 4. He knows every thing I try at times to talk but I am consumed with anger. I love him n hate at same time. Want to run as I do always. Tired pissed n feed up. What'...

parfait624 · parfait624

I have a question on interventions. First a little background. My Abf has been attending AA meetings, working the steps ,and has abstained from drinking since november of 2007. However, he did continue to smoke pot. As a dry drunk his sickness has caused us to have many issues over the last four ye...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I have decided that I am going to confront the mother of my son's friend, whom i am certain is supplying my son with pot and cigarettes, and at the very least, which is undisputable, allowing and supporting such unhealthy and illegal behavior in minors. I am pretty sure she may have a medical marijuana l...

Crazy Frog · Crazy Frog

I will admit my ah behavior is fascinating he went from being a dry drunk of two months to a drunk in few hours ! He went from being miserable and depressed to a charming happy man he never was sober because he denies having a problem. I am detached from this now I am just observing. My daughter for the first t...

Sydkidney · Sydkidney

I am living with my boyfriend who, as it turns out, is addicted to vicodin. I grew up with my parents being drug addicts and am very used to relapse and dissapointment. Boyfriend has gone through rehab and it seemed to change his view on life. He is optomistic and striving to be responsible and, as far as I...

Diva · Diva

Last evening, after another full day of drinking his drink of choice, gin, he began threatening to kill people. I was dumbfounded. Raving, throwing furniture, and completely out of control. I left him alone, went to another part of the house, and after a while he calmed down and went to bed. I don'...

youfoundme · youfoundme

Figured out all the logistics, got myself to a meeting and I am so glad I did! It was a good meeting on resentments. I shared a little about me being there on my knees and not knowing WHAT to do anymore. I shared about my situation too. I got lots of kind words and smiles, imagine that! People kindly smi...

Georgia · Georgia

i've posted a few times - i'm very new to the board and Al Anon but not the disease. i am married to a highly intelligent, high functioning alcoholic. but over the last year or so...the cracks are starting to affect even his job and his ability to provide. long story short....i came home monday to a for...

Aimee · Aimee

Hi! I'm not sure how to ask this so I'll do my best and hopefully it will make some sense. I am working the steps with my sponsor and I am feeling so good lately. I have done 4, 5, and 6 reciently and one of my biggest things was dealing with my resentments and fears surrounding my AH's infidelity. I feel like I...

laura dene · laura dene

im new to al anon (went to one f2f last week & have been reading the posts here for about a week also). im married to an alcoholic who just relapsed at easter after 5 months sober, and my dad is a (mostly functioning) alcoholic. im not sure where to start.. my dah is out at our friends farm drinking righ...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Hello: I have a question; I would like to hear particularly from those who have been in Al-Anon for at least three or more years and have worked the steps thouroughly, at least once. Question: Is it wise to admit to the active alcoholic the wrongful attempts/strategies I used (in the past) to get him to s...

Otie · Otie

Hi everyone. I could sure use some input on a subject very close to my heart right now. I have done lots of reading and get what appears conflicting explainations, depending on the source. Does the A/addict ever feel remorse for the pain that they inflct upon their loved ones?? On one hand, some say th...

Stillalive2dream · Stillalive2dream

Me and my exabf broke up months and months ago. I'm not going to go into the details bc it will just piss me off. Anywho, he treated me awful, lied, cheated, stole from me, called me crazy,etc. during our long dysfunctional relationship. My question is he treated me horribly broke-up with me like I never...

youfoundme · youfoundme

Is my qualifier. My abf. My sweet abf who is really a great person inside...he is the one I am obsessed with and addicted to. My sickness is so great that I can't focus on me for one minute. 30 seconds is too long sometimes. I struggle all day. I am so tired from a life time of concentrating on everyone...

new member · mr5191

New to board and new to Al-Anon. Attended my first meeting last week and it was nice to finally meet people who are going through or have gone through what I have. Typical story. Married 14 years to my wife and have 3 kids. She probably has been an alcoholic for a while but I guess I always ignored the si...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Hi All - Some might recall that I shared a while back about attending Al-Anon meetings with my sister who has been in AA for several decades. I'm here to give those who are interested an update on how that is going. Initially, I was a bit disappointed that my sister began attending meetings with me. I f...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Sad today (Preview) Didn't get to go to the meeting last night, but I am going to the one tonight. My bf drank again yesterday, into another blackout. He fell asleep after work, and I had to take my older son for his doctor appointment. So we did that and when we returned home, my bf was still asleep. I made supper and he cam...	youfoundme	13	1162	May 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Cleaning out my God box~and I thought He had bailed on me~WOW! (Preview) I spent some time the past two days gathering up things for a yard sale, and in the midst of cleaning, I found my old God box (I have several)...I decided to stop the decluttering and gathering and read the notes in my God box from the past year and was amazed to find that everyone had been answered... i...	shellyj123	8	1055	May 19, 2011 by shellyj123
	Birthday Chips (Preview) I have a scenerio for those of you that have been active in the Alanon/AA program awhile. There is a person in my homegroup that attended a few meetings of adult children in the late 60's. This person said they didnt have a sponsor, nor attended meetings of any kind on a regular basis. This member who...	tommyecat	6	4658	May 19, 2011 by Aloha
	Yay! Good news! (Preview) ...as I shared at my F2F meeting today, I am the kind of person who would start off a call to 911 with "I'm sorry to bother you, but my house is on fire"... I'm really not good at asking for things I need. Recently I posted here about asking a manager at work not to schedule me for overtime on a certa...	atheos	7	948	May 18, 2011 by wp
	more that i dont understand....... (Preview) ok, so i have an earlier post that my A relased, but i didnt clarify what he relapsd on. He went to rehab for drinking and pain pills and what ever he could get his hands on. He didnt drink and he says he is really solid and wont ever drink, but a guy left out a line of speed, he says he ignored it for a long time......	Dawny	9	1143	May 18, 2011 by danielle0516
	D.e.n.i.a.l.... Didn't Even No I Am Lie'n.... (Preview) Denial for me is HUGE .... I sit back and realized today after reading "Hope for Today" that I still Suffer Alot from Denial... I have learned to say.. "I'm Good, No Worries" when I am Dieing inside, I am good at Denying myself Happiness, & Joy alot of the times, because I Have n...	Jozie	5	1381	May 18, 2011 by hotrod
	coincidental share (Preview) My wife maintains a group of friends that she has completely vilified me too. All the problems she was having at work or missing social engagements with these friends due to alcohol were attributed to the stress I was causing her. I started fantasizing about her step nine. Pretty funny actually...	DadtoCandE	6	865	May 18, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Relapse (Preview) My son's drug of choice is meth, he has just been released from prison for foolishness associated with poor decision making while under the influence. He is 39 YO he has been in and out of jail for over 25 years because of his continued use. Once again before his release I wrote that if he was to live with m...	Latinarose	4	966	May 18, 2011 by Latinarose
	New but not sure if I want to be here. (Preview) Hi everyone. I have a friend who is 41 and has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. She grew up in an abusive household but is now married with children. At first her drinking was kind of social and we all did it. Now, however, it's to the point of her blacking out, losing her memory, driving d...	tarmale	7	458	May 18, 2011 by tommyecat
	Putting away my microscope (Preview) I like the reading in One Day at a Time from yesterday. Part of it says: '"The hardest thing for me to learn,' said a member at an Al-Anon meeting, 'is to stop imagining that I can figure out why my husband acts the way he does. Automatically almost, I jump to conclusions about his activities and hi...	White Rabbit	9	1292	May 18, 2011 by tommyecat
	Locked myself in my apartment, & took the phone off the hook (Preview) I know Im hiding but, i got him out and i don't want to see or talk to him because i know im not strong enough to say no to him, so, Im hiding, from him from the world, from everyonr and evrything, I feel like im just waiting for something to bad to happen but if i stick my head in the sand ill be ok for now i just want...	juliakessler	6	760	May 18, 2011 by Rora
	After a brief and fantastic reconciliation, things collapsed to new proportions... (Preview) After a 2.5 yr separation, my exaH and I recently tried on a short reconciliation after his 3 months in rehab. I really thought a miracle had taken place. We were communicating. We were sifting through all the hurts, all the fear, all the damage. We were understanding of each others places. It was...	Rora	11	762	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Just need some support today living with active alcoholism (Preview) So I have been working really hard on my own, since I've only gotten to one meeting, I didn't get a sponsor yet. This board has helped and listening to other posts about how to handle things in the mean time until I get a sponsor. Anyway, a few days ago my bf drank, and I didn't react. Things remained calm...	youfoundme	7	580	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Even in the darkest days, your higher power is there... (Preview) I thought I would share a story about how I got introduced to Al Anon and my wife got introduced to AA. It's only recently that I've reflected on this and all that happened and how it is so obvious that my higher power was in control, although I never would have guessed it at the time. About a year or so ago, my...	usedtobeanyer	5	654	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	not sure if i belong here (Preview) My father in law is an alcoholic and has been since my husband was a late teenager (after the mother died). he is now in his 70's. There are only two children one daughter and my husband. We now live beside the father. My sister in law lives away but takes responsibility for his shopping, his housekee...	maddon	6	688	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Feeling Down (Preview) Went to see family doctor with AH this am. He has had a week in hospital but began drinking again the minute he came out. At least he didn't try to tell her any lies about drinking although he did underestimate the quantity. She told him he is killing himself and asked if he wanted to die. He said no but perh...	Tattyhead	14	775	May 17, 2011 by Ness
	i dont know if i can do this.H (Preview) Hello my friends! I need to talk.....my 5 mo sober A relasped last night. He didnt come home all night. i knew he was going to the studio to sing at night so i respected his space ad didnt call him to check up on him. He didnt call me either, which is never good but i thought he was respecting my space too....bu...	Dawny	7	648	May 17, 2011 by youfoundme
	exchanging one drug for another (Preview) I've gotten pretty good at acceptance, and detachment. I no longer even talk to ah about his drinking. But this morning I did. He'd made a date with a friend to go into town this morning. He was walking & talking very slow, had trouble getting his arm in the sleeve of his shirt, etc. I said ¨I may be wro...	pineapple	6	701	May 17, 2011 by flopadopilus
	I feel trapped, how do I get free? (Preview) I am new, and living w/ my active A. boyfriend. My landlord has banned him from the property, and threatened to evict me if he's seen here. I want him to go he's drowning me, But, I also, love him and he has nowhere to go and no friends, he says I have to help him, everytime I tell him to go I'm afraid he'll sho...	juliakessler	6	757	May 17, 2011 by GailMichelle
	I am new here.....I am pretty sure he has a drinking problem (Preview) but he says no...if you were faced with the same situation in a relationship how did they finally see that they indeed had a problem? He was so angry and distant all of the time....that I moved out to give him space and hope he would relize what he was missing but I have heard that he will need to hit "ro...	AD1076	6	834	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Off to a meeting... (Preview) I haven't been for a few weeks and I always get nervous. I am confident that I will learn something and it's nice to be around good people who understand. Ahhh... life. It seems a lot scarier than it really is.	member922	7	499	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	My alcoholic ex husband and my 18 year old daughter and rehab (Preview) Hi, Back when I was 23 with a newborn baby, I went to Al-non for the first time. I realized from that one meeting that I was either going to have to accept the fact that my husband at the time was an alcoholic and live with it, or not. Well I decided not. It was not something I could live with as a young wife....	pvc1	11	826	May 17, 2011 by pvc1
	temper tantrum terrible-two style (Preview) I wish I could throw myself on the floor, kicking and sreaming, fists flying, tears and snot, the whole nine yards. Why do I have to be so grown-up all the time? I'm trying to do the right thing, and pray about it but sometimes I just want to have a good old fashioned hissy fit!!! Sometimes it really sucks to...	Aimee	9	1010	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	I'm not crazy, you are! (Preview) Funny how if one person is accused of being crazy, many of us would have a knee jerk reaction and say "No I Am Not!" Soon a fight ensues and the AH is out the door doing what they do best. It is just one way for an AH to take the focus off their behavior and deflect it to another person. That is part...	tommyecat	8	807	May 16, 2011 by likemyheart
	To help or not - what would you do? (Preview) My dilemma - my ah has, for the last two weeks, been an a** - blasting me with hateful texts and horrible words, mean voicemails, arguements, goading me, taunting, etc. I found out he was drinking of course and, like all drinking bouts, his behavior follows a certain pattern of behavior. This morning,...	likemyheart	6	755	May 16, 2011 by likemyheart
	The Weaver (Preview) This is one of my favorite poems that I heard an Alanon speaker read as a closing to their story. I like to start my week uplifted. This poem helps to give me a different perspective on my "problems". If no one has told you they loved you today, I do. Enjoy! THE WEAVERMy Life is but a weavi...	tommyecat	3	561	May 16, 2011 by Jerry F
	Struggling with my feelings about myself (Preview) Hi, I just wanted to get these feelings out so that I can get some feedback on them and let them go. I'm currently working on my 8th step. I can see clearly how my behaviour towards my partner and other people has been abusive, manipulative and controlling , and I've realised I don't want to behave that wa...	Freya	9	1022	May 16, 2011 by Freya
	I can't tell him he's done something wrong without a blow up... (Preview) If you didn't see my last post, my fiance and I have a 2 month old daughter. People have told us, "It's ok to let her cry sometimes." Yes, I know that but he takes it as every time. I have to ask him, "Could you pick her up? Could you make her a bottle? Could you give her the pacifier?" I ju...	MAR2011	6	574	May 16, 2011 by youfoundme
	Want to share this (Preview) I have shared that my dear son,35, is married to an A. It has been the usual progression of horror. Breaks my heart. I am and have been blessed by MIP members to know how to listen to him. I have shared so many Al Anon tools and truths with him all along. He would call so miserable. I would say I know how horrib...	Debilyn	3	473	May 16, 2011 by Debilyn
	Assertive, or pushy? (Preview) I just sent my boss an email explaining that the time when he usually asks me to work overtime really doesn't fit my schedule well, and listing other times when overtime would fit better into my schedule. I'm worried that maybe I shouldn't have done that. The company exists to serve our customers, not o...	atheos	7	1223	May 16, 2011 by Debilyn
	New and I'm trying to figure things out. (Preview) Hey everyone. I am a bit lost right now and I found this site. I am hoping that someone here will understand and can give me some insight. My fiance is a recovering addict/alcoholic. She is 2.5 years clean from drugs and just a little over a month for alcohol. She is really trying to get her life toget...	Engaged	6	1199	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	I need help (Preview) Hi, I'm new here. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been sober for almost 3 months now. I am so angry!! I have so much rage inside of me and I don't know why. I can't go through the day without yelling at my kids. I am so mad about everything. I want to feel better so bad. I feel like I'm pushing my family away...	poohead	7	579	May 16, 2011 by kitty
	newbie with difficult medical question (Preview) This is my second posting but this is something that has been on my mind. I have started the Al-Anon recovery program and already my life is improving. I am no longer living my AW's life and feeling happier. I know I have a long way to go but this is another testament to this program's success. However,...	mr5191	11	615	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	I'm new and thinking of going to a meeting... (Preview) My fiance is an alcoholic, he has totalled 4 cars in 5 years (one of which was mine). He was an alcoholic way before I met him, he has been to rehab once (3 years ago) but made no use of what he learned there and skipped out early. We have a 2month old daughter that he leaves me alone with all night so he can drink...	MAR2011	9	915	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	trouble (Preview) Hi everyone, I don't know if this is the place for this, but I have to vent. Its 1am and I was up to get a drink. I saw my husband's coat on the chair with the pocket all zipped up so I went inside. There I found a check with my name signed at the bottom and my supermarket checking card. He just did this to me a coupl...	lyn46	9	455	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	Alcoholic Wife Takes My Inventory (Preview) Hi Everyone, I've been reading here for months, but this is my first post. I've been attending alanon meetings for almost 18 months and have been working the steps with a sponsor for about 6 months. My wife is two weeks shy of having one year's sobriety. She's in program, working the steps, and is gon...	surfingmaestro	16	1353	May 16, 2011 by tommyecat
	What I am meditating on today (Preview) Got a nudge to share the readings that I am choosing to find my personal meaning in today. "Meaning-centered people do not try to control the moment but instead live in it. ... By stepping into and living within the moment, we get some seperation from on perspective on time. By living in the mome...	Jennifer	3	508	May 16, 2011 by Debilyn
	Time Article about Addiction from 2007 (Preview) Time article about addiction. How it affects the BRAINhttp://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1640436,00.html-- Edited by suave75 on Sunday 15th of May 2011 02:19:36 PM	suave75	2	402	May 15, 2011 by youfoundme
	Weekend Update Anyone?? (Preview) So I have stayed the course not communicating with the abf. Spent last evening watching tv and pretty much relaxing. Today, my son has a tball game. Then no plans, as well as for tomorrow. I am very happy to have the drama of weekend fighting, out of my life for now. I was invited to a tentative coffee d...	member922	16	628	May 15, 2011 by youfoundme
	Passing It On, Prayer shared in a meeting (Preview) This prayer was shared at my 8.30 AM meeting today. I thought it was good stuff so I am passing it on. Hope you all enjoy! PRAYER FOR THE NEW YEAR Father, Thou knowest I am growing older. Keep me from becoming talkative, and possessed with the idea that I must express myself on every subject. Release...	tommyecat	10	926	May 15, 2011 by youfoundme
	Of all the stupid reasons to freak out... (Preview) My face-to-face meeting divides into tables in separate rooms. One of the rooms has a storage closet. My table finished first, and as I was leaving, a man who is not in Al-Anon asked me to go into the room with the storage closet (where people were still meeting) and get something for him (I think he wante...	atheos	11	658	May 15, 2011 by tommyecat
	disease on attack (Preview) I have not seen my sober ABF for a month, we have had one or two conversations but not much contact as I had hit my rock bottom and he was also feeling weak in his recovery, he has been sober for 8an a half months he was sober six months las time. he came to my sons 18th on friday we were very civil we acted normal...	Tracy	3	405	May 15, 2011 by tommyecat
	heart squished...again (Preview) Hi everyone, So I told my AH that I would be moving out. Naturally he cried and carrried on. The next day at church he had this break-through revelation about how he needs to change his life. The day after that he confessed to me what he had been doing wrong as far as his shady addictive behavior goes. (I al...	lyn46	10	604	May 15, 2011 by pinkchip
	Relapse? (Preview) I see the word relapse used a lot. In my thinking, relapse is what happens when you are truly working a program and trying to be straight and sober but something happens to drag you back down. My AH has not been sober mixed with relapses in my opinion - when he is not drinking he is doing so to prove to me that h...	likemyheart	6	596	May 15, 2011 by pinkchip
	Angry (Preview) I am angry not sure if it's at my self or him. Hate is all I feel can't express this to him because he is happy to be sober n it's 2 mths sober n he is on step 4. He knows every thing I try at times to talk but I am consumed with anger. I love him n hate at same time. Want to run as I do always. Tired pissed n feed up. What'...	Toricross	4	539	May 14, 2011 by Toricross
	Interventions (Preview) I have a question on interventions. First a little background. My Abf has been attending AA meetings, working the steps ,and has abstained from drinking since november of 2007. However, he did continue to smoke pot. As a dry drunk his sickness has caused us to have many issues over the last four ye...	parfait624	7	633	May 14, 2011 by parfait624
	taking some action (Preview) I have decided that I am going to confront the mother of my son's friend, whom i am certain is supplying my son with pot and cigarettes, and at the very least, which is undisputable, allowing and supporting such unhealthy and illegal behavior in minors. I am pretty sure she may have a medical marijuana l...	Loupiness	6	380	May 14, 2011 by Debilyn
	Behaviors (Preview) I will admit my ah behavior is fascinating he went from being a dry drunk of two months to a drunk in few hours ! He went from being miserable and depressed to a charming happy man he never was sober because he denies having a problem. I am detached from this now I am just observing. My daughter for the first t...	Crazy Frog	3	595	May 14, 2011 by Crazy Frog
	Wondering if anyone else has encountered this (Preview) I am living with my boyfriend who, as it turns out, is addicted to vicodin. I grew up with my parents being drug addicts and am very used to relapse and dissapointment. Boyfriend has gone through rehab and it seemed to change his view on life. He is optomistic and striving to be responsible and, as far as I...	Sydkidney	8	444	May 14, 2011 by oldergal
	Frightening! (Preview) Last evening, after another full day of drinking his drink of choice, gin, he began threatening to kill people. I was dumbfounded. Raving, throwing furniture, and completely out of control. I left him alone, went to another part of the house, and after a while he calmed down and went to bed. I don'...	Diva	10	508	May 13, 2011 by Diva
	Went to alanon meeting last night :) (Preview) Figured out all the logistics, got myself to a meeting and I am so glad I did! It was a good meeting on resentments. I shared a little about me being there on my knees and not knowing WHAT to do anymore. I shared about my situation too. I got lots of kind words and smiles, imagine that! People kindly smi...	youfoundme	4	452	May 13, 2011 by wp
	i am done with my AH/marriage....do i keep going to Al Anon? (Preview) i've posted a few times - i'm very new to the board and Al Anon but not the disease. i am married to a highly intelligent, high functioning alcoholic. but over the last year or so...the cracks are starting to affect even his job and his ability to provide. long story short....i came home monday to a for...	Georgia	11	426	May 13, 2011 by clep
	Letting go of resentments (Preview) Hi! I'm not sure how to ask this so I'll do my best and hopefully it will make some sense. I am working the steps with my sponsor and I am feeling so good lately. I have done 4, 5, and 6 reciently and one of my biggest things was dealing with my resentments and fears surrounding my AH's infidelity. I feel like I...	Aimee	6	3295	May 13, 2011 by flopadopilus
	new here & have some questions (Preview) im new to al anon (went to one f2f last week & have been reading the posts here for about a week also). im married to an alcoholic who just relapsed at easter after 5 months sober, and my dad is a (mostly functioning) alcoholic. im not sure where to start.. my dah is out at our friends farm drinking righ...	laura dene	3	449	May 13, 2011 by tommyecat
	Question on Making Amends (Preview) Hello: I have a question; I would like to hear particularly from those who have been in Al-Anon for at least three or more years and have worked the steps thouroughly, at least once. Question: Is it wise to admit to the active alcoholic the wrongful attempts/strategies I used (in the past) to get him to s...	GailMichelle	12	3184	May 12, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Guilt and remorse--Yes? No? Depends...? (Preview) Hi everyone. I could sure use some input on a subject very close to my heart right now. I have done lots of reading and get what appears conflicting explainations, depending on the source. Does the A/addict ever feel remorse for the pain that they inflct upon their loved ones?? On one hand, some say th...	Otie	14	5504	May 12, 2011 by pinkchip
	Need suggestions on detaching after breakup and moving on (Preview) Me and my exabf broke up months and months ago. I'm not going to go into the details bc it will just piss me off. Anywho, he treated me awful, lied, cheated, stole from me, called me crazy,etc. during our long dysfunctional relationship. My question is he treated me horribly broke-up with me like I never...	Stillalive2dream	8	1698	May 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	My drug of choice (Preview) Is my qualifier. My abf. My sweet abf who is really a great person inside...he is the one I am obsessed with and addicted to. My sickness is so great that I can't focus on me for one minute. 30 seconds is too long sometimes. I struggle all day. I am so tired from a life time of concentrating on everyone...	youfoundme	7	483	May 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	new member (Preview) New to board and new to Al-Anon. Attended my first meeting last week and it was nice to finally meet people who are going through or have gone through what I have. Typical story. Married 14 years to my wife and have 3 kids. She probably has been an alcoholic for a while but I guess I always ignored the si...	mr5191	8	371	May 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Attending Meetings w/My Alcoholic Sister (Preview) Hi All - Some might recall that I shared a while back about attending Al-Anon meetings with my sister who has been in AA for several decades. I'm here to give those who are interested an update on how that is going. Initially, I was a bit disappointed that my sister began attending meetings with me. I f...	GailMichelle	4	511	May 12, 2011 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.