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The next right thing
(Preview)
I have been in communication with my ex AH recently, due to the fact that my accountant insists we resolve an issue from our divorce once and for all, my exAH has not taken action on dividing some assets, (company stock) which he was supposed to do immediately following our divorce, over 4 years ago......
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glad lee
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5
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651
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Deja Vu Yesterday...
(Preview)
So of all days yesterday and I could not access the board! My AW called me mid morning to say she was going home from work because she was taking the day off. She said she was stopping by the grocery store before going to the house. I immediately felt deja vu coming on. The last time this happened I found...
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hdftby100
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4
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334
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thinking about a non a who is addicted to his a ? huh?
(Preview)
I am such a dipstick. It's all cool believe me. Today this did hit me. Even though you love a non A, if they have been with an A, they are addicted to that A. omg do you see what I am trying to say? Now I am wondering, am I enabling him? Do I give him a soft place to land? Does it make the progress slower cuz he has me t...
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Debilyn
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8
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519
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What to do?
(Preview)
Hello, I'm new here. I'm the mother of a 27 year old son. He has been out of a 28 day rehab program solidly based in AA, he's been home for a little over three weeks. Sadly he's relapsed, and back in the hospital going through detox again. We had plans to go to Austin to see my oldest son, leaving on Sunday...
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deniselt
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5
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480
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Sisters
(Preview)
I posted a while back about my sister assaulting me at the time of her daughters HS Graduation and I am still struggling with some issues around the whole thing. The drunk sister is still going through the court process because of the assault and interfering with a police officer. I have been in contact...
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Jenv
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6
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354
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On any given day ..
(Preview)
Truth be known I can be just as dysfunctional and with crazy behavior as I was at the very first alanon meeting I attended. I was reminded of this last night when all this garbage with the stbax started coming down. The thing that always shocks me is that other women who are older than I am feeling as if I am...
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Pushka
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7
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511
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1 year later...a little lengthy
(Preview)
Hello, I haven't written on here in a very long time but have found myself in a curious spot so I thought I'd write to see if I could get some feedback. I was married to a pill addict. Long story short there were many years of lies, theft, sickness...everything that comes with addiction. In July of 2011 my h...
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respect
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9
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502
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drinking buddies
(Preview)
I feel stronger since I am connected with you guys and my therapist again-he is a CASAC & that helps very much as he gets my spouse. Now every so often my spouse goes out with a couple and she always drinks and lies. I feel like I can handle it better for the next time. I usually get fuming mad, confron...
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Lyne
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5
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1641
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Tired of carrying this baggage
(Preview)
I am 45 and am starting to deal with the fact that I have never ever had a truly healthy relationship. From the time I was 15 I have only chosen men who didn't want me for anything other than sex, who physically abused me, we're drug addicts or alcoholics, who cheated on me and who were emotionally unavaila...
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TrudyS85
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11
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700
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Acknowledging how I still feel
(Preview)
Here I am two years away from the intensity of the madness, one plus year divorced. Song in my head spinning around - Dido, I will go down with this ship. Looked up the lyrics to see if they meant what I thought they said, yup, I will go down with this ship, I will put up my hands and surrender, there will be no w...
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likemyheart
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18
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604
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Taking it a day at a time
(Preview)
Thanks for your prayers, condolences and esh. I am so glad to be home again and back to my daily life. I am going back to work tomorrow. It'll be good to see everyone and return to somewhat of a routine. I have a very understanding boss who called today to ask how I was and told me I could take more time off if...
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tiredtonite
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7
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570
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trying to live w/ NO FEAR!
(Preview)
These days w/ a lot to be afraid of I am trying to live w/ no fear. It is hard when life is so uncertain. Some things just scare me because I am afraid of the future & then I have to remind myself to just live one day a time. So, I try not to future-trip. I hope that some of you can really relate to all I am feelin...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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350
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Coming back
(Preview)
My Friends, With the exception of a few "drive bys", I have been away from this board for about a year and a half. In addition to feeling a bit overwhelmed with work, parenting, and wicked insomnia, I decided I was at a point where I was stuck, and needed to shift my energy from words to action. T...
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Loupiness
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3
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392
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Completely FLOORED!!
(Preview)
My STBAX has decided to threaten me since I asked him (well I probably told him .. LOL!!) that I needed him to take the kids to school tomorrow. My van is having issues, between the transmission and the heat being out we are getting the first frost tomorrow. He was FURIOUS. I got the most horrid text th...
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Pushka
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18
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515
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First meeting was great :)
(Preview)
Hi ya'll, I hope you are all well and happy today, I just wanted to let you know I finally got to my first face to face meeting and I absolutely loved it, I cant express how nervous I was on my way there, but with help from my HP I got there in one piece, lol, I met some lovely people and while the al anon meeting w...
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Maxine12stepper
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6
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329
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When You Get Your Own House
(Preview)
Feels like a long time since I been here. I been busy. But I still keep in contact with some of the people here so its not like I'm isolating. Got a funny story for ya. About 25 years ago, this guy I know (in AA) was working in a recovery home for alcoholics, and like most A's he had an idea a minute about how thin...
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Wolfie55
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5
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470
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Drinking and Driving cont.
(Preview)
Aloha Family...just checking in before going to bed after a day of being still and quiet which worked wonders at taking the pain out of my back. I zoomed into Stephaniej's thread and read and decided to continue it with my own ESH. I'm a caller and a do unto others as I would want them to do for me. My exp...
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Jerry F
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6
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442
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It's quiet for a little while
(Preview)
Sometimes life is great, sometimes it's rough. I'm in a rough patch and know it won't be forever. My mom has surgery for breast cancer on Thursday and I can't be there, I will be in So Cal visiting my son who is living with his aunt down there, the trip was planned and paid for before she was even diagnosed...
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AStrongerMe
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4
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363
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She did it again and WOW
(Preview)
http://youtu.be/d_sK086rHsI This is my 14 year old singing her second song she was brave enough to post on youtube and I am so proud of the young woman she is. Please give it a listen if you have time. She has grown from a very timid quiet person to coming out of her shell enough to do this, huge step for her...
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Breakingfree
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6
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530
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My dry drunk spouse
(Preview)
I am in the middle of a terrible place mentally and I do plan on starting a live Al Anon group this week, I just have to locate one I can get to since I work 40 hrs a week and am caregiver for my elderly mother. Anyway, when my husband was actively drinking he was verbally and physically abusive . . I had him arre...
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Rosie08
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12
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1418
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newcomer feeling very angry
(Preview)
Last year my daughter had a healthy baby boy. Wonderful. Except that shortly before she gave birth her husband who is always drinking, got himself fired from a good job for repeatedly sneaking home early. She went back to work after 3 months and the "plan" was that he would stay home wit...
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avid
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8
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499
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Cherry on Top of a Craptacular Week
(Preview)
I finally lost it. I have been doing so well at beng detached and working on me but today was the end of that streak. I blew up at the AH because my mom and dad have gotten on my last nerve today and the reality that I am 46 years old and living in 1 room in their house and have nowhere else to go at the moment while t...
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WornOutMrsFixIt
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12
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565
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Ah ha moments repeat
(Preview)
I know why I am stuck in depression, however it is not as bad as last weekend. It is because I have had one of my Ah ha moments again, for the 500th time, that my A is not interested in changing. I think I am grieving the loss of the marriage I thought I had, wanted to have, could still have, but I am not going to ha...
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Lyne
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4
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319
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Just Frustrated
(Preview)
I am new to this board but just find that I need someone to listen to my rambling and maybe relate. I am so tired of being tired. I am married to an alcoholic and I am just burnt out. Burnt out because I work 40 hours a week and he works 8. Burnt out because he can sleep till 2 in the afternoon and I wake up early an...
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smiles54
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4
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333
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Questioning
(Preview)
I can't even say for sure if it is alcoholism I am dealing with in this situation. Irresponsibility with alcohol I suppose. My questioning is how to deal maturely with the situation and how to view it. On a few occasions my husband has come home from work, temporarily working at a liquor store even thoug...
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Yogini
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3
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323
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alcohol and bipolar
(Preview)
i am new here and i would like to ask a question...... can i still attend alanon meetings and do the 12 steps if the alcoholic is bipolar. my son is 35yrs old and bipolor (alcohol and drug induced at 29)..... i am an older (59) mother and he is the reason why i'm seeking help..... i just can't seemed to ju...
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2havehope
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6
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2272
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Staying still...staying full
(Preview)
Good morning MIP Ohana...Family... I'm staying still and and full today...I will let my body heal as is desires and is attempting to do. The pain in my spine screams for attention and the only attention it will get is stillness and quiet. I was going to go to a meeting this morning...my home group, f...
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Jerry F
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5
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348
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Gratitude...
(Preview)
This is a place I can call home. This place is called Alanon World, or even 12 Step World. This is a place where I am not alone. This is a place I share with a host of other people, including you. This is a unique experience, being able to attend a forum from my own dining room table. No petrol in the car and no ba...
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DavidG
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4
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1100
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Alcoholism and Epilepsy
(Preview)
My wife recently started going to AA after several years of our struggling with her poor impulse control. Obviously, this takes the form of drinking often enough to be a problem. The situation, though, is complicated by the fact that when she was a baby she had bacterial meningitis that went untrea...
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SpookyMulder
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6
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464
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Extending a Hand
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I am not new to MIP. I started my journey years ago. In the beginning I tried ALNON, yet I ended up on the AA side/message board. At the time, in my search for help, after hearing and reading ALNON stories or pleadings for 'help' I was dismayed. All I could think was 'bitch, bitch, b...
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learning
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4
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458
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Was that really me?
(Preview)
I looked at my husband after watching the movie flight last night - and I said "The powerlessness? If you would have told me I was losing my kids and my family while I was drinking, I would not have been able to stop even if I wanted to. With out help, I would have so badly not wanted to drink again, but...
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Tasha
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2
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285
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new to board...
(Preview)
Hi..I'm new to board and have never done this before.... My DH is a recovering drug addict. He cleaned up in his 20's...he had been clean & sober for about 10 years when I meet him. Fast forward.... 5 years ago he started taking pain killers for a neck issue... I was nieve and didn't think much of it...
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shamrockgrl74
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11
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436
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relapse
(Preview)
hello to all-- After 2 1/2 years of sobriety and really working an AA program (up until 2 months ago) my AH drank Friday night. We all saw it coming and even he said he knew he was in a downward spiral and ready to drink again. I went back to work 3 months ago and this new schedule has prompted him to need to t...
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crazycatlady
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3
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498
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Dropped by my sponsor...I guess?
(Preview)
Well, I had posted on here last week that my sponsor got really upset with me after she referred me to attend some AA meetings to explore some of my own drinking patterns. I haven't heard back from her since that conversation in which she told me she was busy and didn't know what to do with me. I haven't reac...
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Chaya
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10
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700
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sharing in meetings
(Preview)
Hello again. Together, with my sponsor, I have decided to ask a question about Alanon meetings or Alanon in general. As I may have shared, Alanon is my last loose end I have had to tie in my recovery/addiction process in my life. When I feel afraid to share, though, my process is interrupted. This has not...
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AllieinAlanon
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9
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5599
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apology accepted????????????
(Preview)
Last night at our open AA meeting I apologized for my behavior 2 weeks ago to all that were sitting there in regards to my AH. I didn't feel that he got it even though I made it clear as mud. I felt that I was out of line outing him on some of the things he has done--not my place. I felt it necessary to share it w/ th...
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Hoot Nanny
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0
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261
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Manipulation
(Preview)
Why are alcoholics manipulative? Why do they berate, insult and try to make others feel guilty? What is the best course of action when they do this? Thank You.
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Summerseeker
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6
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469
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Advice for a newbie
(Preview)
Hi out there! I have never before dealt with anyone seriously affected by alcoholism. I will say, I have enocuntered certain struggles with some close family members and friends that may over-indulge from time to time, however never someone who is an active AA member and currently dealing with his...
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SecondChance
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13
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523
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Funny business with the money
(Preview)
For the first time in many many years, I have 2 overdraft charges on our checking account. Now, I know I have been lax about taking care of stuff but when I checked the account I realized that AH had been taking out extra cash on debits wherever he went. He basically took out around 400-500 in the past 10 d...
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ilovedogs
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12
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741
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Nothing has changed but everything has changed.
(Preview)
I shared that I was in a relationship that has been going over ten years. We have never met face to face. Just everyway else to communicate. Best friends, confidants, all very moral and great. It started feeling different. Growing like I suppose we all wish would happen in our lives. But still is fine ju...
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Debilyn
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8
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619
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Closer to bottom
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. Today, I received a call from my father. He hadn't been to work in the last little while and today he said he went to go see his doctor. His doctor put him on anti-depressant medication because he is depressed. he called to tell me tha...
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slogan_jim
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3
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331
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Slow Slow Journey
(Preview)
I have been trying to work on myself. After deciding it was time to divorce my AH , he decided it was time to convince me he could change. He really had me going there for a while, I was allowing myself to believe him. We were having good talks, had a nice 'date' out and then it came up in a conversation that I di...
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TrudyS85
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3
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296
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still in a funk
(Preview)
Ya know, my spouse is promising again to change. I think everytime she makes these promises she actually plans to do it. But in a week or two, she is right back to the old tricks. I told her she's not changing because she doesn't want to. It's me that wants things different. I no longer believe she wil...
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Lyne
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3
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294
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well...
(Preview)
Well...as you can see I am on here again after yesterday. Good news can travel fast. I am so glad that I don't have to worry about my health. God is in control. Just yesterday someone famous mentioned that she had thyroid cancer & one of my FB friends just had an operation to remove her thyroid for the s...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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345
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Newbie here but Old Timer
(Preview)
I have been reading here as often as work allows and decided it was time to introduce myself. I am a survivor of addiction. Both parents were alcoholics and my mother died from cirrhosis. Both of my brothers are drug addicts, also. I have been married for 26 years to an alcoholic and drug addict that now...
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sweetyhide
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4
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348
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Anxiety Seperation
(Preview)
After heading down to my first meeting yesterday, I felt a mixture of relief and confusion. I feel I belong there, but Most if not all were still with their partners that have stopped their addictions. I am not, at least not physically. I find that I am still trapped in both mentally and emotionally. E...
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aprilla
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3
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357
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Drinking and Driving
(Preview)
I know this topic has come up many, many times here, but I'm hoping to re-visit it with your ESH, as I try to examine my own motives. My AH has three DUIs. Because now, he does most of his drinking at home after work (and he works until 11 p.m.), he is not in the environment he used to be in before we were toget...
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stephaniej
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9
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567
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Finally going to a meeting!!! yay!!
(Preview)
Hello my MIP family, I am so happy to tell you guys im going to my first F2F meeting on sunday!! and boy do I need it, I had an awful day yesterday and decided to call up the al anon head office in london to find any 'day' meetings in my area, there are two evening meetings near me that I just cant get to as I have t...
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Maxine12stepper
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3
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333
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Very Concerned about Elderly, Alcoholic Mother - Newbie to forum
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I am new to this forum. My mother is 64, her parents were both alcoholics and she began drinking about 20 years ago when I was in high school. For the most part she is what I would call a relatively high functioning A- she went to work every day, was dependable for any social events, did...
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kkhinaustin
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3
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3799
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What about moving on and new relationships????
(Preview)
I have a question. I know I feel the need to control things. I know that I get overwhelmed at times and feel stuck. So when it comes to a relationship, what does "let go, let God" mean exactly? I am attracted to A's. Always. My friend said we should go to a local sports pub the other day to try to mee...
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katfshh
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14
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746
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How do you deal with the void of the past when you grew up in this family disease?
(Preview)
dear all, if you like, please share with me how you deal with those emotioanl gaps in your life created by alcoholic behaviour. As we know it is not only the liquid itself, but the psychological behaviour connected to that disease. Looking back, my sight got clearer, I understand, I comprehend, I get n...
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tortuga
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5
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487
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So many feelings
(Preview)
It's just grief - all these changing feelings from one hour to the next due to my mother dying. It's becoming more real. I wonder how it will be, the funeral, people at the wake. I'm not sure we'll even have anyone due to the storm and people being the age they are. It could just be us. My sis in law will be as s...
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tiredtonite
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8
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426
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I am a resentful b_ _ _ch(fill in the blank)
(Preview)
I have self labeled myself this way today: resentful b*tch. At least, I am this in my own head. I have been working my program, working with my sponsor, forgiving as best as my heart knows how to, but something feels missing. I, at multiple times of the day, pray for my AH and tell my HP that I am giving AH...
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ilovedogs
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16
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1698
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briefly... please read!
(Preview)
This morning I found out that my ultrasound is normal & that it seems that I don't have ovarian cancer. My arthritis doctor thought that was a possibility. Pardon me, but I sometimes think he is a quack! I want to stop seeing him so bad but he prescribes the medicine that lessens my pain. I feel like I a...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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752
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Family involvement
(Preview)
Well I must say that this week has been a pretty good one for me and the AW. Tuesday night she went to bed early and I stayed up some and watched some TV. My 23 year old daughter called to check on our grandson, who was also sleeping. I had discussed the alcohol use with her mother a while back. Sadly I shou...
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hdftby100
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3
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222
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Once again, reaching for sanity
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I so appreciate your posts..they help me get in touch with my feelings and experience compassion for all of you and me. Often the last person I feel compassion for is me. I am hurting this morning and I look forward to attending an al anon group and a session with my therapist today. I am e...
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PP
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8
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549
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He's sending me flowers
(Preview)
I guess he feels that flowers solve all marriage problems, LOL! I'll gratefully take the flowers but we've got a long way to go and it's not going to get me to Costa Rica either. There are so many things that need to happen and flowers just don't cut the mustard. He kept asking me if I could receive mail h...
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ilovedogs
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8
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557
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Same Old Story
(Preview)
My husband summoned me downstairs to watch the President's acceptance speech, when he heard me get up to go to the bathroom. Of course, he had been drinking (like every night). Of course I have no idea how much he had been drinking, but of course he was displaying all his classic signs of being drunk. ...
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stephaniej
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12
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604
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Please prayers for our TT
(Preview)
TT's Mother passed. Our friend needs our prayers and love. She is a strong little lady, is in that grieving fog now. I know you all will send the all the love you can to her, mip sisters and brothers always do. thankyou, Debilyn
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Debilyn
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18
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435
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And the sun comes out...
(Preview)
Aloha MIP Ohana (family) and good morning. It started out overcast, dark and wet from last nights rain. I wasn't in a very healthy mood until I clicked on here. Another sleepless night with the physical, emotional and mental pain from the police assault, one year to the date tomorrow increasing...
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Jerry F
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13
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446
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