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28 years on Saturday...
(Preview)
I just had a Al anon anniversary on Saturday! I hope a lot of people read this! I am so grateful that I kept coming back. My official first meeting was on a Friday I believe in Napa, CA. I was nervous & wasn't sure why I was there. I mean, I knew about AA but didn't see the need for Al anon quite yet. A couple o...
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Hoot Nanny
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8
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444
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Prayers of support
(Preview)
I have feelings of fear/anxiety today and I have feelings of peace/hope, too. I am going for a stress echo tomorrow as I have been experiencing chest pains, pressure and burning in the heart area. There is a history of heart disease in my family on both sides and my younger sister needed a minor repai...
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PP
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30
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520
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AW leaves at 10pm to come back at 2am to beg forgiveness to leave at noon
(Preview)
My AW came home at 2 am and begged me to forgive her. Said her new meds had kicked in and she felt remorse for wrecking our family. Admitted the affair with the coworker said she made A bug mess of our lives. I was so happy she came home it was so good to hear her say those things. All morning I could barely sleep...
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TryingHard2013
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17
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481
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knocking off for evening....swimmer's ear ache bearing down on me
(Preview)
Well, i posted my day w/daughter and at the club...made some remarks about some "flashers" goin around with almost nothing on and really need covering up... I hope i did not offend anyone poking fun at these crazy people...I hope my clarifying on my post was proper amend, but right now???...
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neshema2
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3
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144
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Funny for Today
(Preview)
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Cathyinaz
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10
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333
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Wet brain.
(Preview)
Interesting. I usually make a point of not thinking too much about what is going on inside my A's mind or body, because I don't want to bring out the "nurse" in me. In fact I think I made a deliberate effort not to concentrate during the part of my course last year that dealt with alcohol-relate...
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Melly1248
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18
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3329
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Drowning In anger and sadness and blind with rage
(Preview)
What am I supposed to do to get past the anger of my AW setting me up for a big fall by apologizing and then leaving. I am awake again my poor toddler is asleep she keeps asking for AW where did she go? How come she did not come home?. It's one thing to kick me maybe I'm the sad codependent dog who deserves to get k...
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TryingHard2013
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11
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484
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Meditation, Quotes
(Preview)
"YOU CANNOT SOLVE A PROBLEM WITH THE SAME MIND THAT CREATED IT." EINSTEIN
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Beatrice
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6
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926
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phases of the moon and me....
(Preview)
Taken from Todays GiftWe, too, the children of the earth, have our moon phases all through any year; the darkness, the delivery from darkness, the waxing and waning.******************************** Sometimes , a lot, I wonder why, when the whole world around me cycles and breathes, I imagine t...
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neshema2
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5
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312
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A good day!!
(Preview)
I went back to work today and I decided to walk to get my lift, it was dark, the wind was howling and the rain came on like torrential rain, the walk takes me past an exposed piece of land and I felt right there I had two choices - feel really sorry for me being battered by this weather and set myself up for a rubb...
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el-cee
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7
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226
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Trying to stay on my side of the road, it's hard :(
(Preview)
This week my Addict son is suppose to go to court, in 2 different counties, the one we live in and then another court 60 miles away. He is on unsupervised probation in both counties, one for dui and one for a minor offense. Anyway, he has violated probation in both counties and is looking at jail time, ma...
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heythere
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11
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300
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Letting go of things that don't support my sense of well-being
(Preview)
I went out to my garage as the winter weather battered my house and gusts of wind shifted and re-shifted the fallen snow. I felt the swirling of dire weather reports and the excited voices of newscasters as they foolishly stood on highways to "show us" just how "bad" everything...
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grateful2be
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22
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504
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Okay....Next!!
(Preview)
I've been put on alert. I've been blessed for such a long time and HP wanted to let me know that I'm still human and subject to "humaness". Friday tried to finish a bathroom remodel for a client and thought (lol) I had all my ducks in line and then of course learned "you don't take a duck...
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Jerry F
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9
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228
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AW fights when Boundaries hold firm
(Preview)
Well predictably my AW spent the entire night out only to text me this morning that she was sorry and she was coming home to recover with me and our daughter. And spent the entire day calling and texting me to engage in a conversation. I refused. I cannot listen to anymore lies. I enlisted the help of famil...
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TryingHard2013
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20
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488
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2 RULES ABOUT CHILDREN
(Preview)
There are 2 rules regarding Children. 1. You never ask them to deal with adult issues. 2. You never hold them responsible for things they can't control. Unk
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Beatrice
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3
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262
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I don't know how to handle this anymore
(Preview)
my AH decided to drink again on New Year's Eve. It included me being freaked out & thinking he was going into a diabetic coma, and realizing that, after running to the store to get batteries for the glucometer, panicking that my daughter was alone with him & something would happen to him during...
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ryanhearted
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21
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606
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Here it goes a pity pot kind of morning (long one)
(Preview)
Not sure exactly what is wrong with me, but I am fully triggered and moody. I wonder of my exAH was able to make it through the Packer game last night sober with my 5 year old, I hate that I failed a class last semester and now have to take a semester off to catch back up, I am just not feeling healthy right now so...
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Breakingfree
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13
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344
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So, my AH got in a bar fight today
(Preview)
He is several hundred miles away, working. Things are generally as they have been for the past few years. We spoke around 4:00 this afternoon, and he was clearly very, very drunk and he said he was sitting in his truck in the bar's parking lot. He told me he had been in a fight, because another guy at th...
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stephaniej
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5
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308
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How to avoid judgement, watching over...
(Preview)
Hi again, I wanted to refrain posting or at least digest a little more of everything that has been said since my first post. Yet I feel deeply compelled to come back since things have worsened since. My mom has always been a really heavy drinker and for a while it was really bad. Yet over the years, she curb...
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midori
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10
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336
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feeling needy and aprehensive----time to call sponsor
(Preview)
Well, i don't talk about my work b/c it is not alanon, but there is a power struggle going on at my biggest job and the dad who hired me is slowing down...i got stuck w/his middle son who does not care for me...His beef against me is that I do not go to church.....I can't do anything right by him...Had a long ta...
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neshema2
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7
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384
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We have a baby, I don't know how to detach
(Preview)
I am trying to focus on only myself. I am trying to find happiness and strength, like I always had before. If I didn't have a child, that would definitely mean moving out immediately, running long distance again, having friends over frequently, getting involved with the university et cetera. It woul...
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lmyya
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9
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359
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An alcoholic friend/anger.
(Preview)
Hi, My name is slogan_Jim and I am grateful member of al-anon. I have noticed something about me that is related to someone's drinking and I want to address it. I have an old friend that I have stopped talking to because I feel I can read all the patterns and they resemble strongly those of my father. I cut t...
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slogan_jim
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6
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393
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A woman can surely bring a lot of change into my life... with a quickness! LOL (PICTURES NOW WORK!)
(Preview)
Won't go into any details, but 2014 started showing itself to be a good year right off the bat. Got a check for work I did almost 2 years ago and had given up on ever getting, got several very good, well paying jobs back to back, bought and sold a car (1998 Cadillac DeVille) and while I didn't make any real m...
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John
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16
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481
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sponsor out--step one w/a friend---off to club to get grounded
(Preview)
Well when plan A isn't available (sponsor) go to plan B (recovery friend)...I worked step one, I don't feel alone, my Creator is with me...when I let go...detach....do my best--surrender the rest, I find my balance again.....I have been "ok" this far, I will stay ok, I guess... Headed of...
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neshema2
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2
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217
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Praying for change...prayers needed!
(Preview)
Good afternoon everyone! Well, I just got the message that my roommate is going to be on his way tonight...depending on what time "tonight" is for him, he may be here very soon for me. I have a houseful of junk and mess that my A has made, and of course has done nothing about all week. That's his u...
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Raven Juniper
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8
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440
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Day 6 - making a choice setting a boundary
(Preview)
Last night was possibly harder than any night to date in the past two months. I posted and posted and went to the chat room and vented an vented. At 11:45pm I sent AW a message I said this is a boundary for me and for our daughter. You are not to come back here until you get clean. I told her If she did not come hom...
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TryingHard2013
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7
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361
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Happy New Year!
(Preview)
I hope everyone had a safe and Happy New Year and Christmas (if you celebrate that). For the first time in a long time..our Christmas went really well..we opened gifts at home then went to my sister's house and then my uncle's house (my dad's brother)..it was hard not to be anxious but very surprisingly...
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phoenixmagicgirl
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2
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119
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I. Hate. Alcohol.
(Preview)
Hi. I'm new. So there may be a few blunders or redundancies. I'm not quite sure how I got here, what particular train of thought let me to Google, or why I felt compelled to search "who else is sick of alcohol?" But it led me straight to this forum and here I am. It's not like anything really bad h...
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midori
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22
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610
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When do you know they want help??
(Preview)
My son called said he is done living this life..! He said he needs medical help.. All the other times I would put him in sober livings or Christian rehabs. But he admits that it maybe more then that. I don't know if I doing right, but I will take him to seek medical help and see how true he is about this. This is...
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Gaby
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14
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500
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Guidance on detaching WITH LOVE ??
(Preview)
Today's reading in One Day at a Time in Al Anon talks about detachment - it has always been one of my big challenges - I think I understand part of detachment, about not jumping in to fix things and letting the alcoholic \ addict have responsibility for his \ her actions - but in today's reading it talks abo...
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texas yankee
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23
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535
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Step 9
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t56158773/step-9-alanon/
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hotrod
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0
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232
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P F & E
(Preview)
There it is Jerry, you put it in a nutshell: Projection, Fortune Telling and Expectations.... isn't that what we think is going to work for us! Until we wake up to Al-anon.....! og
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oldergal
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3
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164
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Detachment and yes...With Love
(Preview)
I was outside, getting ready to brave the cold and go to the club...hoodie on, and i notice that my little shrub that i nursed through summer, trying to keep it alive, finally died...I was sad, but dug up the little shriveled thing that was dry as a bone..No life in it and i look up and daughter #2 is pulling...
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neshema2
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3
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309
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why are aa, na, and alanon steps all the same?
(Preview)
i can understand why each group has steps, but if it is "not my fault" and beyond my control, then what does the alanon-er have to confess to and make amends to/for? why are the steps the same? it seems like that means it IS my fault. it sure makes you feel like a failure when both of your children...
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barbaralewis
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11
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419
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Blessed...really
(Preview)
Aloha Ohana...My HP loves me unconditionally and loves to see me smile and laugh. Yesterday I went to my "other" morning home meeting "at the bay" and I got there just a minute late cause first things first...breakfast with my spouse (priority in the marriage) and as I was wa...
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Jerry F
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7
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243
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I'm so scared for him.
(Preview)
I am so confused about my AH. We went on a family holiday for a week over Christmas. It went very well because my AH didn't drink too much. But as soon as we got home he was back at it. When he is home he sits at the computer playing a game all day (pretty much from the time he gets up til he goes to bed) and drinking...
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Anise
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8
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376
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So far so good...
(Preview)
It looks like the roommate thing is a go. I talked to the guy last night, and he most likely will be here on Tuesday. Money's going to be tight at first while the roommate finds a job, but it's not an issue to me because I've been living this way for a long time and I've made it...so far so good :) My son is also on...
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Raven Juniper
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4
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292
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My AW left today
(Preview)
So I got home from California this morning and she was packed. Told me she wanted a divorce, said she would not stop seeing the other woman. That she hated me that she had been unhappy since we met and that I was the reason she drank and never smiled. I knew this was coming like a coiled serpent waiting to spr...
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TryingHard2013
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10
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473
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Very Aware of Time Slipping By
(Preview)
I started out writing this for myself because my thoughts and feelings are so scattered and sometimes I write more clearly than I think. I decided to post it since I could use a little ESH and it may help someone else out too. The things that I wanted for my AH are happening. He is making a legitimate attemp...
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wornoutmrsfixit
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18
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667
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No Fishing Allowed
(Preview)
Hi Everyone! We live in the Northeast. Husband and I both have to get to work in the am and I also drop my youngest adult child at the train station (he commutes to work). Well, last night as my husband was watching the impending snowstorm on the news, he comments, "So, what am I doing tomorrow?"...
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MorningGlory
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12
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370
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He decided to stop and it got worse....
(Preview)
So out of the blue he says........I've had enough. He called his AA buddies, got his supplies (vitamins, juice, water) and so it began. He only asked me to watch him in case it got so bad that he had to go to the hospital. I said, "sure I can do that." He was sick but got thru it. At about day 4 h...
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jillybean1
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12
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524
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when being called a "freak" feels good
(Preview)
Today i had my eval at the club.... young hard body little lady approaches me and shakes my hand and takes me to her office for the health questions....then she asks me my age....i tell her and she looks at me like i am NUTS!!!! Good feeing for me....I am gonna like this girl.....she was no way believing i...
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neshema2
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10
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399
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Made myself feel icky. Now what?
(Preview)
Sigh. Ooops. Had a 2 day "honeymoon" as ABF "quit" drinking on New years Day and was charming, sweet and delightful for the duration of his sobriety. I know better than to believe it is anything more than a blip, but it's hard not to enjoy the relaxed, friendly atmosphere when it m...
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Melly1248
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26
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652
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Take care Friend in the East
(Preview)
I'm thinking about you all in the east during this show storm. Prayers that you stay warm and safe. I wish I could send a little sun from AZ.....this pic taken at work. -- Edited by Cathyinaz on Friday 3rd of January 2014 11:16:29 PM
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Cathyinaz
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27
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483
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my "one word"
(Preview)
This morning I woke with a cough/cold/headache so just lounging on sofanwatching rose bowl and some morning talk show excerpt. They interviewed author of "just one word". He said people rarely keep list of new years resolutions. His idea (abbreviated by me, as I understand it) is inst...
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lgnutah
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17
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892
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Courage and boundaries
(Preview)
I just landed in JFK. In about an hour I will be f2f with my AW. During my long flight home I had a lot of time to read posts and think about detachment and boundaries. I decided that I will need a boundary if this marraige has a chance. I will go to couples counseling. I will encourage family activities. But f...
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TryingHard2013
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9
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377
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Anyone have a morning Al-Anon routine?
(Preview)
I've decided I want to start every morning off with 10-15 minutes of Al-Anon related activity. Sort of a daily practice to keep me grounded in the program and get the day off to a positive start. Read from a daily reader and... something! I haven't figured out what the "something" should be y...
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atheos
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11
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602
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Just a WHOA moment
(Preview)
I was just looking at FB and someone posted some 20-25 yr old (high school or college?) pics one of which had AH in it. Everyone looks so cute and fresh faced and he is leaning hard on someone, with a drink in his hand (ONLY person with a drink) and just this totally out of it expression. This is around when we...
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tweety23
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3
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231
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Coming home after 3 days without AW
(Preview)
Today I fly back to the northeast with my daughter. My AW has been there since 01/01. Being apart from her felt good. I felt stronger I did not miss her. I did not long for her to see how much I loved her and how the last 11 years are in ruin because of her behavior the last three months. I started to feel detache...
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TryingHard2013
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11
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358
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Need Some Support
(Preview)
Dear Al-Anon Members, Thank you for taking the time to read my post. I am in a difficult situation, because a few months ago I ended my relationship with an ex-boyfriend who is in inpatient treatment recovering from a heroin addiction. Under normal circumstances, a breakup would be much easier to han...
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msjuliet
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13
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510
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Sometimes progress kinda just sneaks up on me
(Preview)
At work today, I am slammed...Busy as a bee.....I worked 5 hours instead of the 3-4 it has been....5 hours is NOT a rarity, I have worked that many many times before...In fact: Because I am careful and do it right the first time, I actually get more done in less time becuz I am careful and this is YEAR END ti...
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neshema2
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4
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352
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Found Some Courage
(Preview)
I have been checking in here off and on for over a year and I've made a few posts. My husband is a binge drinker and can go long periods of time without drinking. This makes it very easy for me to be lulled into a false sense if security. I decided quite a while back ago that I needed the support of Alanon and sho...
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In The Forest
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17
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345
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The Whole Serenity Prayer
(Preview)
The Serenity Prayer God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not...
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oldergal
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5
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2738
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family disease
(Preview)
Hi all, need to just write on here and clear my mind its going a bit AWOL!! I have the focus on myself, my life , recovery 99% of the time and then BANG, I loose my focus. People in my life have been affected by different illness e.g my mum is a codependent adult child. I have learnt to accept and detach i love he...
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Tracy
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4
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307
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THIS IS BETTINA I AM NOT A NEWBIE IM AN OLDIE
(Preview)
HELLO EVERY ONE , HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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Beatrice
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10
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345
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New Year Resolution: Join MIP and stop lurking
(Preview)
It is true, I have been lurking for some time. New year- new beginnings. I wanted to finally introduce myself to all of you and say that you are an amazing group. I have been taking Jerry's expert advice and really really listening. I hope eventually I can offer some useful ESH. I drank, smoked, and drugg...
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MorningGlory
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16
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314
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Peek a boo .. I see you ..
(Preview)
So after freaking my kiddo out by all of the contact again .. we are back to no contact and I'm ok with that at this point. Honestly so is she. She doesn't trust his motives and neither do I. The therapist says it's better for her not to have contact with him at this point. So I'm taking her at her advice an...
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SerenityRUS
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9
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360
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it is not easy!
(Preview)
Boy, it is not easy to get this typed. I am dealing w/ a new computer at the library--free internet service. I guess I shouldn't complain. I am frustrated though. I don't need to get feedback from this post. I just need to say Hello & that I am still on the right track! Kathleen
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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164
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I was unkind to my exAH.....
(Preview)
We had an agreement that while he took on the responsibility of my 5 year old to live with him an hour and a half away he would remain sober and actually begged me for the opportunity saying he needed this chance. So I per usual trust an A and go along with the agreement, but he was meeting with an AA sponsor an...
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Breakingfree
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13
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482
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OMG
(Preview)
This is Bettina under another name, I purchased a new lap top and have been trying to get back in for over a month. The website just would not recognize me or let me back in. Anyway, glad to be back. What's new?? I really missed coming here and missed you all, HAPY NEW YEAR! hugs Bettina
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Beatrice
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13
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340
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