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Stop ME NOW
(Preview)
I'm sitting here at work setting up computers and as I wait for the next thing to do....I'm at my PC looking at DUI Lawyers. WTH!!! Please tell me this is not good and he's going to have to deal with a public defender. I'm nuts!!!
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Cathyinaz
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17
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564
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What part of the program has to do with family?
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
So I have been thinking. I have attended Al-anon for four years. In those four years pretty much every family I know has gotten divorced. I would say over 60% of the A's have had affairs in AA. The children are unhappy. So exactly what part of the program is to do with family values?
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Truth
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60
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1004
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Traditions as a Guide to Healthy Relationships
(Preview)
TRADITIONS AS A GUIDE TO HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS It is said that the unity of Alcoholics Anonymous and Al-Anon is the most cherished quality our fellowships have. Our lives, the lives of all to come depend squarely upon it. The practice of our 12 steps puts our lives in order, but not necessarily our rel...
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recoveryhope
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4
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6792
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Wisdom here or should I say
(Preview)
Co dependent . Been a bad week I told myself I would not enter the ring of fire with my A . I agreed to that when I changed my name to wisdom . I'm going to be very careful what I say on here . My honesty has got me in worst problem then I have before . That's all I'm going to say . I know I'm keeping to my side and workin...
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Wisdom67
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2
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265
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Sponsor feedback
(Preview)
She is a master manipulator. Right now you aren't a match for her skill. She doesn't have the tools to get where you are today. This is feedback from my sponsor regarding my end-of-relationship woes due to continuing contact with my ex. It pains me to hear my sponsor say it, but I know it to be true. I r...
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recoveryhope
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4
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199
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Alcohol actually SAVED my marriage...
(Preview)
Said my AH. I couldn't believe my ears!! Alcohol saved it for that last 10 years or so?? Huh?? this is his explanation:" Every time you yelled at me I would drink and hide out in our room". So I guess what he means is he hid from me instead of fighting. So bizarre. This is the disease talking in ful...
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Newlife girl
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6
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434
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I know my rights
(Preview)
I know my right now as a person who struggle with every day choices and demands that are placed on us when we have the right , our own right to chose what is good for us . Like every other person -no matter what age exsperience or situation , I am rare , unique worthwhile,human being I will make mistakes and wi...
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Wisdom67
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7
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383
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Hello
(Preview)
Hi, my name is Jenny and my husband is an A. I realised this about 2 1/2 years ago and since then have done all the usual things!! (Searched the house for bottles, been through his pockets for receipts, taken away his bank card, taken him to his GP, to AA, to 1-2-1 counselling, to hypnotherapy, to group ab...
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Mum to Belle
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4
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342
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Feeling Sad/Ashamed to show people who I really am.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. I had a great weekend this past weekend. I went on a road-trip with some friends and had a great time. However, it left me feeling sad. On the way home, a friend of mine popped in and hung around my apartment while he waited for his girl...
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slogan_jim
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8
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471
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Whose emotions are these?
(Preview)
I love it when my A decides how I'm feeling. 'You seem pissed off.' 'Is something wrong?' 'I just don't get what's with you.' 'I'm just trying to help because I care!' I was just chilling out and making dinner. Projection much? Well, as AlAnon has taught me, not my problem, not something I can fix.
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SpiderArcana
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8
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414
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My AH is tired of being "blamed" for his "cancer"
(Preview)
I am moving out soon, and I see divorce not far away. I hate it because I love HIM, its the Disease that destroys me. We are just so not on the same page. He is frustrated because he is being blamed for his disease. Sure I can understand where he gets the feeling of me blaming him...That needs to be and proba...
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sadsusie
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11
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883
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I am in withdrawal going from calm, serene sitting still, to psychotic ugh
(Preview)
Ok there are times in the life of a person who is the only human in the house has its moments. No one to bring ya some water at night, help ya find your glasses, no one to say uh your deoderant is NOT working. for me right now, no one said, make sure you use your last week money you save for stuff,you save acouple...
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Debilyn
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8
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500
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Halt
(Preview)
I was sitting here thinking about halt. I'm not angry or lonely but I can and will do something about hungry and tired. I haven't eaten anything for about 24 hours now so I got up and made myself a small bowl of soup. I don't feel hungry but I know I will sick soon if I don't eat something.....so I'm taking...
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Cathyinaz
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14
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306
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Is he an Alcoholic? What do you think?
(Preview)
This is my first time visiting Al-Anon of any type. I have been married to my husband for four years and the whole time my Mom and Dad have told me that they believe he is an alcoholic and that I should check out Al-Anon. I don't want to be in any type of denial and I want to know for sure if he is an alcoholic so...
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hmk
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6
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398
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haha..IRONY..haha
(Preview)
I just HAD to share this! So my AH has been gone for maybe 2 or 3 days...kept saying he was coming home...We both know I am moving out (tomorrow)...I have about giving up hope and I have been crying all day....so I had myself a beer. Now, I totally can't handle alcohol, I relax but I really can't do much else!...
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sadsusie
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6
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213
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Morning
(Preview)
Nisa ( my son's kitty ) was with me last night. She laid by my side for a while. She purred and loved my scratching her ears. She noticed my phone with the wind turbines turning in the screen background. She couldn't keep her eyes off it. Then she started to attack, hitting the screen and opening up pr...
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Cathyinaz
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12
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381
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Forgiveness.
(Preview)
Hi all. I've been posting on here for a while and have been contemplating posting this. Myself and a few other young women who have been survivors of abuse/addiction and more were featured on MTV about forgiveness.
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Forgiveness82
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3
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328
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I have to stay positive; Let go & let God!
(Preview)
Just saying that today it is very important that I stay positive. I am going through a stalemate right now. I hope that I have the courage to stay where I am. Only God knows what will happen next. Perseverance is the key I think. I am only able to do what I can do. So, w/ the program in tact I can see the light at t...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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216
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QTIP & WAIT
(Preview)
It's been a rough winter, and I'm really glad spring has sprung! Even with all the lovely cottonwood fluff floating around and the back yard looking like a jungle of nettle.... Still struggling with codependent and rejection issues, but feeling a little stronger. I've been writing WAIT on my hands f...
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Raven Juniper
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8
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286
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Stupid stuff I am feeling.
(Preview)
Well, I'm still under the same roof as ABF. But not in the same way. After his drunken attack 5 weeks ago I was feeling pretty screwed up. I knew something had to change but as I have explained on here before, I sort of had a bit of a PTSD spaz and just kind of lay in bed shaking for a week. I'll never forget that;...
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Melly1248
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10
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496
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Feeling the feelings
(Preview)
Its a while since I have shared here, in many ways my life is good and I generally find a balance in my feelings and emotions, but for the past week I have felt very flat. Whilst its so easy to blame being busy at work or the day to day stresses of life I spent some hours earlier in quiet meditation and contempl...
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flinn66
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6
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471
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New Member Introduction -- Request for 4th step Experiences/Activities
(Preview)
Hi there. I am a new member on the Al-Anon family message board. I started attending Al-Anon meetings last month and have recently decided that I am Al-Anon and I would like to continue with the 12 steps. As it is, there are limited meeting times available to me in my area, and I do not yet have a sponsor...
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HervieB
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5
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1949
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Very confused
(Preview)
So my husband is a self-proclaimed alcoholic (he knows he is and so do I) that doesn't think his alcoholism is a problem. He thinks that since he doesn't go out and get drunk, works and supports the family and is functional that he doesn't have a problem. His mom, grandma and dad are all alcoholics as we...
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arlivipj
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11
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378
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Is my husband an alcoholic?
(Preview)
Hi everyone, It's my first time here. I am married for 15 years - 3 kids - my husband used to smoke weed with his friends but has stopped about 8 years ago. He also used to drink socially and would sometimes drink to the point of throwing up but again that was not very often. In the past few years, I would noti...
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Shif
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10
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485
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Intimacy
(Preview)
How do you handle intimacy? I have no desire whatsoever to be intimate with AH. NONE! All my feelings, how he acts, what he says to me etc...has zapped any feelings of intimacy that I can possibly have. I have tried explaining to him why, but stopped he doesn't get it. Seeing him all drunk walking ar...
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chadg
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11
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481
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And The pendulum swings......
(Preview)
I have been thinking about my actions last night or Reactions really. Selfish actions made out of frustration and bitterness. This was NOT what I was going for. I was soooo proud of myself (still am) for finally standing up for myself and living MY life. I guess that while I was basking in my own glory I f...
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sadsusie
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6
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429
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we can work it out!
(Preview)
We can work it out! And, that is not just a song title. I am trying so hard to work things out w/ my mom. Over the weekend she talked to my husband about how she always jumps when I need something. Maybe that is true but she does need to one-up me. I guess she thinks that one good turn deserves another. She still...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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186
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Still trying to learn the new balance....
(Preview)
John's Hula Hoop made me think. I am okay staying in my Hula Hoop until I have to advocate for my son. If he was teenager, I would just teach him the tools and trust he could deal with it.
I really like "minding my own business" lol
Where is the balance in this situation? I still struggle with...
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Truth
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23
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540
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I have to keep reminding myself...but why??
(Preview)
I left my AH a month ago after what he calls a slip up. Over the past few years his slip ups have been worse. He has been in jail once and the hospital 3 times. It was too much for me to handle. The roller coaster of alcoholism was making me crazy. I was always anxious waiting for him to drink again. He has been dr...
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Newlife girl
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12
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401
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Just venting before I explode
(Preview)
I can't believe how clueless my AH is! He can't be trusted not to drink and drive with the kids so he promised to take our 6 year old skiing, which is 60 miles away. Couldnt understand why I'd go, he said he was sorry, he's in control, read the term verbal vomit and that is so appropriate. So spent day in car an...
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Kerrymom
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4
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509
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The hope of finding healthier people
(Preview)
I should have a happy smiley linked to the title but right now I'm just crying. I have been so enmeshed in a very sick relationship that I have been unable to get out of in spite of about 3 years of trying to leave. I was sick when I got into this relationship in the beginning, about a decade ago. I feel that I a...
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ClearTheFog
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14
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446
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Fear
(Preview)
Good Morning all Yesterday I spent a lot of the day praying, reading and went to a open AA meeting. My fear is there and I have cried quite a bit yesterday. My son's phone was checked and there is nothing. We can only pray it's off because he when to a safe place and that's a rehab center but if not we don't h...
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Cathyinaz
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17
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471
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My new counselor as of today said........
(Preview)
I sound like I have some isms and may be codependent. I love him already and feel like after my first session he will be able to help me through some things. He knows of both programs and our session was awesome. So glad to be doing the work again! I only get an al-anon meeting every other Tuesday night with w...
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Breakingfree
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10
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588
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A's drinking buddies won't leave
(Preview)
There are a bunch of people who have turned our house into a "party shack" and won't leave me alone. This might be a common problem. They are claiming I am harassing them when I try to get them to leave and that I am creating a chaotic environment. Arrrgh. I have already gotten into trouble for y...
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Baffled
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7
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758
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Recovery is like a vast supply of water....
(Preview)
Welcome to Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums! Twelve Step recovery programs can be a life sustaining substance to many people, just as water is.You can get a cup full or a barrel full. There is plenty here to take as much as you want or need.If you leave too quickly and don't get enough, you are...
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John
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6
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244
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Financial toll of alcoholism
(Preview)
We don't talk about the finances of an alcoholic's consequences on here too much, or maybe I just hadn't noticesd it untilit really hit me this week, when we had the hearing for 2nd DUI. I wanted to write this for two reasons: get it off my chest with someone besides recovering AW, and so other folks can...
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KennyFenderjazz
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16
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580
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Guilt shame won't let be live
(Preview)
I'm really looking for some help here guidance I should say . I got my self in a pickle. My regrets denial shame guilt has ruled my life for as long as I can remember . I took my books out again reading the Alaon on way to me it's the only way I know I can find a grounded way to living my life the way I should be and tr...
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Wisdom67
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11
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433
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Minding my own business
(Preview)
I love this recovery program, someone said 'Its a simple program and its us who make it complicated' which is really true for me, its the simple things that have the most power. Im such a grateful member of Alanon and I love to read the wisdom of old timers who can speak this language really well as I can lea...
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el-cee
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9
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528
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New member here (Very lengthy post)
(Preview)
Please forgive any mistakes I may make. Im not only new to this group, Im new to posting anything in a forum. I am hoping to find some support until I can get enough courage to actually attend a meeting in person. The closest one to me does not meet until next Saturday, and Im feeling so desperate right n...
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NatalieP
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6
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483
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Things winding down and not ..
(Preview)
It seems that things are winding down and not so much .. stbax has been laid off. Well, .. I'm not getting divorced while he's laid off .. lol .. how stupid do I look? Apparently, I have "STUPID" written across my forehead with these atty's and it just blows my mind. I'm thinking that my May t...
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SerenityRUS
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6
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417
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Emotional Abuse
(
1 2 3
)
(Preview)
Why is emotional abuse so prevalent in recovering alcoholics if they are practicing a program?
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Truth
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92
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1951
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Supporting a Significant Other
(Preview)
So I've been getting serious with a very cool girl who is the love of my life and is a recovering alcoholic. She has been sober a little over a year and I have only known her during this time. I would like to learn the best ways to support her because I want to be there for her in all walks of life; however, I fran...
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ardy9
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3
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557
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I feel like I can take my life back
(Preview)
I am so pleased today. I have had a handful of small challenges and I have reacted differently to them. I've been standing up for myself and standing my ground and doing what *I* want. I had secured a new place to live on Friday, so that was certainly a beginning. My AH broke our "deal" by being...
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sadsusie
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7
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503
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Oops I did it again!
(Preview)
Good morning, Here is my story. I was married to an A for 12 years. Had 2 sons with him. I lived in his crazy world and at first I tried to hide his alcholism from my family. He would regularly disappoint the three of us. Through many arrests and jail terms, the final straw for me was when he was arrested f...
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cmb
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3
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372
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my mom is using me again...
(Preview)
I am sorry to say but I am tired of my mom using me. She once again, only is in it for herself. I noticed that the last few days she hasn't called or anything but today she needs me to get into her email so she can once again, get her tickets for her trip down to see my family. Again, basically she is kicking me to t...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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327
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New Here and Need Help
(Preview)
I'm new to this board, but not to Al Anon. I try to attend meetings when I can. My story is probably similar to many of you. I've been married for 19 years, two girls ages 12 and 15. My AH has progressively gotten worse over time, but has not hit rock bottom yet, so still denies that he has a problem. He drin...
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Jkphotogal
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14
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441
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Recovery vs Working For God
(Preview)
Not all alcoholics are the same. There's the dominant type and the dependent type. Not all Alanons are the same. There's the dominant type and the dependent type. And actually, every human being, alcoholic or alanon, has both of these personality traits. Its just about knowing what your percentage...
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WorkingThroughIt
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11
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531
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quote
(Preview)
Feeling gratitude & not expressing it is like wrapping a present & not giving it! Kathleen
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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140
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He went away OK
(Preview)
I just got off the phone with my X's wife and she said they kept my son for 12 hours before releasing him. They also asked him to go to detox but he refused. This makes me feel a little better ( WHAT?) he didn't leave in such a bad state even though he will go down pretty quickly unless he stabilizes his syst...
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Cathyinaz
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14
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568
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Is he an Alcoholic?
(Preview)
This is my first time visiting Al-Anon of any type. I have been married to my husband for four years and the whole time my Mom and Dad have told me that they believe he is an alcoholic and that I should check out Al-Anon. I don't want to be in any type of denial and I want to know for sure if he is an alcoholic so...
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hmk
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4
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327
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Trying to regain trust ....
(Preview)
I'M trying to figure out when I will be able to trust my AH after his big relapse five weeks ago and still drinking one or two days a week. I don't trust him with nothing not even the money he makes that goes in our joint banking account because I'm always wondering if he will drinking our money away. I try to g...
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NavySealWife
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5
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463
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Fear of "Being Duped" - your experience please
(Preview)
I'm watching a TV showe where someone in recovery is talking about feeling "tricked" or getting something different than they thought or were told theyd get. anyone have ideas on where this comes from? I'm coming up with this: feeling let down by parents or other authority figures. Can y...
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WorkingThroughIt
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7
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582
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He's Homeless
(Preview)
Just got a text message from my X. My son was not right so he took him to the hospital to find out he's been drinking and his BAC was .507. They came home and my X asked for my son keys so he can sober up before he leaves but my son refused and is out driving. My son is officially homeless... First I pray he d...
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Cathyinaz
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30
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564
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a reason to post
(Preview)
I am under a lot of stress. It seems that I will not get health insurance until they fix a problem I am having getting it. I am waiting for a response & am on pins & needles. I would rather not say what the real issue is because I feel that it is private & that mentioning it would be a bad idea even on...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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215
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My mind may be approaching serenity but my BODY is NOT
(Preview)
Well, It seems like it is time for me to make my move. I knowingly agreed to give him one more chance. He made an attempt to not drink, was 4 days sober, and chose to hang out with people/environments who temp him. He did not come home last night. I am no longer willing to wait for him to change and suffer the d...
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sadsusie
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5
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466
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Al anon gives us a choice
(Preview)
I just wanted to mention what al anon has given me. It has given me a choice. We can choose whether or not to live with an alcoholic. Nowhere in the literature that I have read does it say "you must live with an alcoholic". Al anon gives us tools to live by. Tools to use whether the alcoholic is sti...
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Newlife girl
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4
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193
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In the beginning there was honesty
(Preview)
Hello make this quick . I go back to Therepy next week with hope he can help me with my 4 the step . Dr does have knowledge in the 12 program both sided of st. But he will help me better understand why my inventory is so hard for me . Last night looking at old photos and I seen letters of my spouse inventory he had d...
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Wisdom67
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2
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289
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Checking my motive?
(Preview)
At my counseling session today I talked about what happened Saturday - ah was drinking with daughter in car. She told me to report it social services- it seems like the time frame would be off (it was almost a week ago, in my experience they also don't do anything with reports) and motive would be trying t...
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Kerrymom
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6
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352
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Be Bold!
(Preview)
Hi everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I a grateful member of al-anon. I had an experience today. It was an experience where I set expectations and wound up disapointed. I thought one thing, while the other thought something else. The entire time I could sense that something within me was a miss. I wasn...
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slogan_jim
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9
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219
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Dealing with crazy people? Warning....contains a lot of pointless venting....
(Preview)
I think this is all right to discuss here. I don't know if this lady is an A or not (although I have my suspicions) but she sure behaves like one and dealing with her is making me as crazy as she is!! Remember cat lady? Well she hasn't gone away in spite of my wishing and hoping. As her pink letters in the mailbo...
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Melly1248
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18
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623
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