Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Sammi · Sammi

We can not do this any longer. So I came here for some words of wisdom. Maybe even just to be able to talk to someone about what my family is going through. It is lonely being the parents of an alcoholic son. Sorry, I first should introduce myself and give you some backgroun...

acjmom · acjmom

Hello All...I not really sure where my thoughts are today...last night was so hard to get through...hubby has been gone a week today..I miss him and want him home...but him being gone was my choice...and now I feel like I HAVE to stick to my guns this time or nothing will ever change. I have set bou...

faith · faith

&...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I got online and my AH was on there so we chatted for a while and it was very sad and depressing. He is robbing and stealing his way across the country so he can get back here. He keeps talking about how he can't be better unless he is with his family. I tried to stay positive in our discussion and encourag...

maresie2 · maresie2

Well as everyone knows the A gets up in the morning pretty early (that is when I am not working I generally work till 6:00 a.m.) but on my days off (which are few and far between) he gets up and immediately slams into a huge fit of provocation. At some point in the past I usually bit the bullet. A...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I normally have my hair done every other Thursday... my little treat for me. This past Wednesday my hair looked awful so I called my hairdresser to see if possibly he could work me in. My HP was at work in this one and he had time to do my hair so I was a happy camper. When I got home DH told me tha...

Lakegirl · Lakegirl

Life has been good to me, I have a lot that others don't have, haven't really had to work hard, not hit on, physically that is, and two beautiful boys; so why am I so miserable and lonely. Well maybe it is because my AH has decided after 18 years of sobriety that he can handle drinking just a bit, WRONG! Havin...

bev · bev

well AH went to shands hospital in gainsville,he left to go there at 5 this morning.we just got got home.they did alot of ct scans on his face and head,and it came back that he doesnt have a broken jaw at all.the small hospital here where we live was wrong.it is just very badly bruised..and of all things th...

acjmom · acjmom

Good Morning All....Today is day 10 of my A being gone, and even with him being gone he STILL has my household in an uproar, except now its the fact that he gone that is causing trouble,my 16 year old loves my A (as does everybody else) and cant get over the fact that hes gone, now he has made up h...

Gailey · Gailey

Dear family, I am having an issue to deal with that I just don't know how to handle. My A son and dil will be finalizing a divorce next month. I have come to accept that. My 2 granddaughters, ages 4 and 6 are still asking why daddy is not coming back to live with them. It is heartbreaking! When he firs...

bev · bev

well to begin with this morning AH wanted to run a few errands,so we left to do what we needed to do.around 2 on our way home he said i want to go to the river and do some fishing and have some beers..i didnt say anything...went home he got his fishing stuff together,ran him to the bait store to get worms and be...

Lakegirl · Lakegirl

Just reading your encouraging words makes me feel more at ease. I do live in a small town where every one knows everybodys business, it does make it more difficult for a meeting. It has been 17 years since I last went to one, never thought I would have to again. This is wonderful getting to type out my feeel...

barisax · barisax

This is my first post here, just saying hello. I get to Al-Anon meetings once a week or so, but it's nice to have something in between that is available just to share, vent, or whatever. I don't currently live with an active alcoholic, and not sure if I would or could. Been there, done that. It is very d...

Barbara · Barbara

Im bored at work (library), Im bored at home I need something to strive for - a goal - something to work towards. Years ago it was weight loss for example. What are your immediate goals? something you do every day to make yourself happy?

AlaMom · AlaMom

My concert was awesome. Both bands totally rocked. Several things occured to me during and after the show. The groups that played were Journey (my fav) and Def Leppard (hubs fav) so it was really apprapo that we went together. I have always loved Journey for their music but...

irish54 · irish54

Thought I'd share a wonderful email I got from a friend. >>Two Horses >> >>Just up the road from my home is a field, with two horses in it. From a >>distance, each looks like every other horse. But if you stop your car, or >>are walking by, y...

Lexie · Lexie

((((((((Friends)))))))) I received some very bad news this week. My dearest friend from high school is dying of cancer. She has very little hope of winning the battle over cancer, since it has invaded most of her body. We have been friends for over 42 years and to think of not hav...

Becky1 · Becky1

OK, rtexas got me to thinking. I sometimes try to write my AH a note, or letter, and it backfires on me. I have examined my motives, and I just have wanted him to know my true feelings. But, it often angers him. Lately, I have written to him, and torn them up before I give him a chance to re...

Becky1 · Becky1

Last night, my AH came home from the neighbor's house, (who is also an A, and his longtime friend since they were teenagers.) He was drunk. Started putting me down, being mean. I have tendonitis in my thumb, which is very painful, and has developed into "trigger th...

DoN4me · DoN4me

When I joined this program I was lost and hurt, scared, tired, troubled, full of resentment, anger, unhappiness, doubt. What this program has done for me is it has showed me the way at a life that I have wanted but was to scared to try to have. Now I know progress is not perfect. I know that I will ha...

lulu2 · lulu2

Hi roomies! I am still alive. Still dont have a computer and the one at the library wont let me into the chat room. I just wanted to say HI ! I miss you roomies (((((( erin, sparky, bump, cujo, josey, DE, john,Tea, GG, trina, joni, tt, cedar, kis)))))) and I know there were more. ...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((((((((Family)))))))))))), Just had to share with you a beautiful day.

Hubby has been scoping out hunting places on state lands because he is disabled and can drive the trooper there. He has been bugging me for the past several weeks to go and look at one with him. I hav...

megan · megan

What is a triathlete? Someone who competes in a race with 3 events. My events yesterday were a half mile swim, 15 mile bike and 3.1 mile run. This course of events took me 2 hours and 14 minutes and I successfully finished without walking. Why do I post this here? When I found this site I was at the m...

Becky1 · Becky1

Dearest Al-Anon friends~ I love you all so very much. Although we have never met in person, I often think of each one of you as I go about my day. I work on an assembly line, so I have lots of time to think! When I first came here, I was hesitant, I had never gotten involved in online chatroom...

AlaMom · AlaMom

Last week I posted about my feelings of missing a concert due to a death in my recovering A's family. I shared about resentments I had over his past issues vs. my want to attend this show. That night I attended a meeting in which one of the topics was step 6. During this meeting it occur...

Rita G · Rita G

I had the wonderful opportunity to attend the HUGS (Hope, Unity, Gratitude, Serenity) Women's Retreat in Spring, TX this past weekend. I also had the pleasure of sharing my story as the Saturday night Al-Anon Speaker. It was such an honor and humbling experience. I, like many...

Newbie · Newbie

I have currently found myself attracted to someone who is a recovering A (I have only known him sober). This is new in the fact that I have not been in a relationship with an A for years. However, I grew up surrounded by As. The connection the two of us share is phenomenal.&nb...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Let It Begin With Me When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help let the hand of Al-Anon and Alateen always be there, and - Let It Begin With Me. JEWEL LYRICS "Hands" If I could tell the world just one thing It would be that we're all OK And not to worry 'cause worry...

faith · faith

Hello to all- I am a 28 yr old woman who has had her life forever changed by alcohol. I know it started in the womb-My mother and father were both alcoholics-My mother 36 when she got pregant with me already had 5 other children whom she had givin up to different people for the disease-my father 40 an...

artygirl · artygirl

Hello Me again. My husband has called me several times this afternoon begging and pleading with me for 1 more chance. I just don't think I can do it. He's talked to a few people about killing himself. He even left me a fake suicide phone message on Monday morning. He was very drunk and high on cocaine,...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

blue Hello Friends, Well it's finally the last straw....I have been trying so hard to bide my time until I am a little more financially able.....all that went out the window today..after being out of work for more than 4 months and me holding us together...he got his fi...

by a thread · by a thread

Why does my guy sabotage our relationship with drugs/alcohol every time things are going so good? it doesn't make sense... he uses it when he needs it the least? I'm so tired of the ups and downs, been hurt and let down more times than I can count, really having a difficult time understandi...

Kelly M · Kelly M

I'm new here, have been to a few f2f meetings. My husband is an A, been with him for 20 years, married for 9 of those years. He was out of control when I met him, still drank, but was better most of the time. In 2000, he went on a bender while on vacation in the Carribean, went to a Dr. down there and was tol...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

We had just gone outside with our little dogs about an hour ago. 10pm, I heard a skid then a thud. I said it sounds like a car accident. Remember now, I live in a rural county. so we have almost complete silence out here. Our dogs started howling. We thought surely someone on the blacktop heard it and will go...

bev · bev

hi havent posted in a couple weeks..but this past weekend i went away to disney with my mother in law,daughter and granddaughter{went from sat to tuesday}on friday the day before we went my AH wanted to go out so i took him to the bar{he went to the bar that deals with drugs}well anyways i went to pick him u...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

It has been almost 6 weeks since my A husband and I were talking. We have been here many times and in the past it is around this time I start getting weak. I would be so devastated when my husband and I would argue and he would demand that I leave and tell me he wanted a divorce. He wo...

maresie2 · maresie2

As some of you know I have been working a pretty low wage job and not really getting that far with my plan b. I have the opportunity tomorrow to go interview for a much better paid job and also another interview on Monday. I am hoping to do like Andrea and others have to land a job despite the odds again...

kicky · kicky

The A I've lived with for 6 years didn't come home last night. It's not the first time and I know it won't be the last. But my kids are 10 and 12 now and they "get it" that he isn't still working at 10 pm. I don't want them to think their successful mom is a sap when it comes to relationships and what she wil...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Hi, I'm working on my list of boundaries today because I know the A will be back in town soon and I want to be prepared. So far I have he doesn't stay the night at my house or on my property. He doesn't come here or call drunk or expect to see the kids under the influence. I think he's about to lose his license fro...

leo · leo

Not ready to write a proper post just yet but would like a few hugs sent my way if you guys have any to spare. Had a big fight with my husband feeling okay but I have taken my wedding and engagement rings off today which I never do. Haven't made any decisions just feeling a little in limbo right n...

Tammy · Tammy

Please pray for ME, i need my HP's strength to get thru this.. I need my HP's guidance, support and LOVE right now.. My husband needs his HP to guide him too..

maresie2 · maresie2

I made a lethal mistake of telling the A I am going on a job interview. This morning he starts in at 4:30 the house is a mess, then he moves onto that I buy too much dog food (he has accused me publicly before of neglecting the dogs). Now he is off on a riff about his socks being missing.&nb...

mommaof2 · mommaof2

Alright, so I attended my first Al-anon meeting on Monday. I was so scared because I didn't know what to expect, and I'm extremely shy on top of it. By the time my 1st step meeting was over, I was alot more relaxed and somewhat relieved. I was happy to know alot of other people are feeling the same frust...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

I emerge out of my cocoon to share my progress I have a "relapse" into old behavior. My A backed out of counseling yesterday and of course used all sorts of excuses to justify it. I went from that place of feeling good and happy regardless of what he does or feels right back into the poop of fee...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Thank you all for your kind words. Speaking from my heart is new to me since joining this program. In my family of origin we almost never blurt out "I love you" to anyone. It was understood.... I guess. Well I acturally sent that letter to my AW. When we t...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, Well today was a great day, and still is becasue I am not asleep yet, close lol, but not yet. I really can't not remember much at work, it was so nuts :) just like me and just the way I like it. At the end of this month I will be completing my second term as an AmeriCorps member and lol I will be an alu...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi roomies, My family and I returned from our vacation on Sunday. It was a great trip and I was able to meet my neice and nephew for the first time. (Neice is adopted an extremly adorable 2 year old and my nephew is 12 weeks old.) Things were great. Hubby was such an amazing support and was...

rtexas · rtexas

Dear ....... Last night you asked me a question. You said you needed to know if you had to stop drinking for me to show you any love and affection? Honey, it's not a simple question to answer. I can tell you this... I do love you, I always have. In the middle of our worst moments I sti...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I heard that an alcoholic or addict stops emotionally growing up when they start using. Has anyone else heard this? IE if they start using at 12 they act like 12 year olds and never grow up from there emotionally until they are sober for a good long time?

annmarie · annmarie

Hi all, I've noticed my tendancy to people please a lot recently. I'm trying to undo this and create new boundaries for myself. I am actually quite surprised at how natural this was/is to me. I've come to the conclusion that my self esteem must actually be quite low. My Abf asks me what's wrong with me a lo...

Gailey · Gailey

Here is something fun to do. List things you are grateful for for each letter of the alphabet. Of course you don't have to post if you do not want to. I still have many more to think about. See how many you can do. A ALANON….of course B BRUCE…my husband C COMPASSION for the A D ...

horselover58 · horselover58

I am still having trouble getting into the chatroom. Was there last night after work, but can't get in this morning for meeting. It says I have been banned, something about my IP being on a "blacklist." I have absolutely no clue what is going on or why. Anothe person said they experienced simil...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I was talking to a friend the other day trying to figure out why I couldn't just let go after all I have been through and I told her I couldn't stand the idea of him being with someone else. She asked me why? and I didn't know. Then she said you're afraid he's going to treat someone else like this? And I said No,...

acjmom · acjmom

Hello All- I am new here and have been looking around for a couple of days and havent seen what Im looking for...maybe just because there is no answer to the questions I have...I have been with my A for almost two years and feel like I have gave all I have to give, we have tried everything to make this w...

Gailey · Gailey

I have not tried to get into the chat room for a long time. Today I decided to stop in on the 9:00 a.m. meeting. Cannot get in. This is what it says at the bottom of the white box: Connecting... Unable to conncet: java.net ConnectException: Connection refused: connect Please help!!!!

Newbie · Newbie

Just a quick question on how to overcome the characteristics we developed in your experiences with As. Does it help to address the issues with a recovering A. Is that where the issues reside or does just working the program do it? Just curious.

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I am sure there are some of you who have left your A and have children in common. How do you deal with them seeing the children but not getting sucked into getting back together? How do you deal with seeing them even if you don't want to?

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I promise this is my last one tonight but I wanted to take a minute to talk about something the last post brought up. My daugher (his step) and my AH have not gotten along for many years. He constantly finds fault with everything she does. Sometimes I even think he lies about things to put her in a bad light....

beachbaby · beachbaby

Hi Everyone, I have to vent, as many of you may remember, my ex bf A/CH and I split after he went to rehab, at the recommendation of his sponsor. No relationship in the first year, etc etc. I really understood and thought it best for me too. I held out some hope that we may reconcile an...

artygirl · artygirl

Hello Just when I start to feel really good about my decision to divorce my A/cocaine addicted husband, so that I can get on with my life and have a happy future...... he calls me and begs me to come back. He says he promises that he won't use and will quit drinking if only I will come back to him. He says h...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	This is it.... (Preview) We can not do this any longer. So I came here for some words of wisdom. Maybe even just to be able to talk to someone about what my family is going through. It is lonely being the parents of an alcoholic son. Sorry, I first should introduce myself and give you some backgroun...	Sammi	6	272	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Last night was so hard (Preview) Hello All...I not really sure where my thoughts are today...last night was so hard to get through...hubby has been gone a week today..I miss him and want him home...but him being gone was my choice...and now I feel like I HAVE to stick to my guns this time or nothing will ever change. I have set bou...	acjmom	5	390	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	i felt so much better last nite (Preview) &...	faith	3	1750	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Feeling sad and depressed (Preview) I got online and my AH was on there so we chatted for a while and it was very sad and depressing. He is robbing and stealing his way across the country so he can get back here. He keeps talking about how he can't be better unless he is with his family. I tried to stay positive in our discussion and encourag...	carolinagirl	4	450	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	not being provoked (Preview) Well as everyone knows the A gets up in the morning pretty early (that is when I am not working I generally work till 6:00 a.m.) but on my days off (which are few and far between) he gets up and immediately slams into a huge fit of provocation. At some point in the past I usually bit the bullet. A...	maresie2	5	287	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	I told my story (Preview) I normally have my hair done every other Thursday... my little treat for me. This past Wednesday my hair looked awful so I called my hairdresser to see if possibly he could work me in. My HP was at work in this one and he had time to do my hair so I was a happy camper. When I got home DH told me tha...	Mobirdie	8	363	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Waking up in a new world (Preview) Life has been good to me, I have a lot that others don't have, haven't really had to work hard, not hit on, physically that is, and two beautiful boys; so why am I so miserable and lonely. Well maybe it is because my AH has decided after 18 years of sobriety that he can handle drinking just a bit, WRONG! Havin...	Lakegirl	6	521	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	update on very bad saturday nite (Preview) well AH went to shands hospital in gainsville,he left to go there at 5 this morning.we just got got home.they did alot of ct scans on his face and head,and it came back that he doesnt have a broken jaw at all.the small hospital here where we live was wrong.it is just very badly bruised..and of all things th...	bev	5	413	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	GGGRRRRR..... (Preview) Good Morning All....Today is day 10 of my A being gone, and even with him being gone he STILL has my household in an uproar, except now its the fact that he gone that is causing trouble,my 16 year old loves my A (as does everybody else) and cant get over the fact that hes gone, now he has made up h...	acjmom	6	280	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	In need of ESH - (long) (Preview) Dear family, I am having an issue to deal with that I just don't know how to handle. My A son and dil will be finalizing a divorce next month. I have come to accept that. My 2 granddaughters, ages 4 and 6 are still asking why daddy is not coming back to live with them. It is heartbreaking! When he firs...	Gailey	4	367	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	very bad saturday nite (Preview) well to begin with this morning AH wanted to run a few errands,so we left to do what we needed to do.around 2 on our way home he said i want to go to the river and do some fishing and have some beers..i didnt say anything...went home he got his fishing stuff together,ran him to the bait store to get worms and be...	bev	6	302	Sep 25, 2006 by jkiss03
	Thanks to all (Preview) Just reading your encouraging words makes me feel more at ease. I do live in a small town where every one knows everybodys business, it does make it more difficult for a meeting. It has been 17 years since I last went to one, never thought I would have to again. This is wonderful getting to type out my feeel...	Lakegirl	1	319	Sep 25, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Hello (Preview) This is my first post here, just saying hello. I get to Al-Anon meetings once a week or so, but it's nice to have something in between that is available just to share, vent, or whatever. I don't currently live with an active alcoholic, and not sure if I would or could. Been there, done that. It is very d...	barisax	4	263	Sep 25, 2006 by david62
	aside from life w/your A - is your life challenging? (Preview) Im bored at work (library), Im bored at home I need something to strive for - a goal - something to work towards. Years ago it was weight loss for example. What are your immediate goals? something you do every day to make yourself happy?	Barbara	4	274	Sep 25, 2006 by kismetstrand
	Reward of a different kind.... (Preview) My concert was awesome. Both bands totally rocked. Several things occured to me during and after the show. The groups that played were Journey (my fav) and Def Leppard (hubs fav) so it was really apprapo that we went together. I have always loved Journey for their music but...	AlaMom	3	239	Sep 25, 2006 by Christy
	Now THIS is Al-Anon! (Preview) Thought I'd share a wonderful email I got from a friend. >>Two Horses >> >>Just up the road from my home is a field, with two horses in it. From a >>distance, each looks like every other horse. But if you stop your car, or >>are walking by, y...	irish54	7	389	Sep 25, 2006 by TLC2
	Please pray for my friend (Preview) ((((((((Friends)))))))) I received some very bad news this week. My dearest friend from high school is dying of cancer. She has very little hope of winning the battle over cancer, since it has invaded most of her body. We have been friends for over 42 years and to think of not hav...	Lexie	9	329	Sep 25, 2006 by Ria
	Letter to My Alcoholic Husband, Words He'll Never Read (Preview) OK, rtexas got me to thinking. I sometimes try to write my AH a note, or letter, and it backfires on me. I have examined my motives, and I just have wanted him to know my true feelings. But, it often angers him. Lately, I have written to him, and torn them up before I give him a chance to re...	Becky1	11	18093	Sep 25, 2006 by Ria
	Get Out the Earplugs (Preview) Last night, my AH came home from the neighbor's house, (who is also an A, and his longtime friend since they were teenagers.) He was drunk. Started putting me down, being mean. I have tendonitis in my thumb, which is very painful, and has developed into "trigger th...	Becky1	12	459	Sep 24, 2006 by Ria
	Progress in me (Preview) When I joined this program I was lost and hurt, scared, tired, troubled, full of resentment, anger, unhappiness, doubt. What this program has done for me is it has showed me the way at a life that I have wanted but was to scared to try to have. Now I know progress is not perfect. I know that I will ha...	DoN4me	0	196	Sep 24, 2006 by DoN4me
	Still alive (Preview) Hi roomies! I am still alive. Still dont have a computer and the one at the library wont let me into the chat room. I just wanted to say HI ! I miss you roomies (((((( erin, sparky, bump, cujo, josey, DE, john,Tea, GG, trina, joni, tt, cedar, kis)))))) and I know there were more. ...	lulu2	4	240	Sep 24, 2006 by Maria123
	Serenity (Preview) ((((((((((((((Family)))))))))))), Just had to share with you a beautiful day. Hubby has been scoping out hunting places on state lands because he is disabled and can drive the trooper there. He has been bugging me for the past several weeks to go and look at one with him. I hav...	Karilynn	10	323	Sep 24, 2006 by drucilla06
	I am a triathlete (Preview) What is a triathlete? Someone who competes in a race with 3 events. My events yesterday were a half mile swim, 15 mile bike and 3.1 mile run. This course of events took me 2 hours and 14 minutes and I successfully finished without walking. Why do I post this here? When I found this site I was at the m...	megan	17	315	Sep 24, 2006 by Jeannie
	Letter to My A-Anon Family Which They Will Hopefully Read (Preview) Dearest Al-Anon friends~ I love you all so very much. Although we have never met in person, I often think of each one of you as I go about my day. I work on an assembly line, so I have lots of time to think! When I first came here, I was hesitant, I had never gotten involved in online chatroom...	Becky1	11	607	Sep 24, 2006 by danz123
	Rewards of doing the right things... (Preview) Last week I posted about my feelings of missing a concert due to a death in my recovering A's family. I shared about resentments I had over his past issues vs. my want to attend this show. That night I attended a meeting in which one of the topics was step 6. During this meeting it occur...	AlaMom	4	450	Sep 24, 2006 by david62
	HUGS - Women's Retreat (Preview) I had the wonderful opportunity to attend the HUGS (Hope, Unity, Gratitude, Serenity) Women's Retreat in Spring, TX this past weekend. I also had the pleasure of sharing my story as the Saturday night Al-Anon Speaker. It was such an honor and humbling experience. I, like many...	Rita G	2	447	Sep 24, 2006 by Mobirdie
	Is it for real? (Preview) I have currently found myself attracted to someone who is a recovering A (I have only known him sober). This is new in the fact that I have not been in a relationship with an A for years. However, I grew up surrounded by As. The connection the two of us share is phenomenal.&nb...	Newbie	9	396	Sep 24, 2006 by Zyperiris
	Al-Anon's Declaration (Preview) Let It Begin With Me When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help let the hand of Al-Anon and Alateen always be there, and - Let It Begin With Me. JEWEL LYRICS "Hands" If I could tell the world just one thing It would be that we're all OK And not to worry 'cause worry...	kismetstrand	2	497	Sep 23, 2006 by bob6502
	i am looking for a way to cope (Preview) Hello to all- I am a 28 yr old woman who has had her life forever changed by alcohol. I know it started in the womb-My mother and father were both alcoholics-My mother 36 when she got pregant with me already had 5 other children whom she had givin up to different people for the disease-my father 40 an...	faith	4	282	Sep 23, 2006 by Becky1
	when to take threats seriously... (Preview) Hello Me again. My husband has called me several times this afternoon begging and pleading with me for 1 more chance. I just don't think I can do it. He's talked to a few people about killing himself. He even left me a fake suicide phone message on Monday morning. He was very drunk and high on cocaine,...	artygirl	12	522	Sep 23, 2006 by sallyb
	Prayers for Strength (Preview) blue Hello Friends, Well it's finally the last straw....I have been trying so hard to bide my time until I am a little more financially able.....all that went out the window today..after being out of work for more than 4 months and me holding us together...he got his fi...	Andrea12	14	601	Sep 23, 2006 by chris52
	why is he so weak? (Preview) Why does my guy sabotage our relationship with drugs/alcohol every time things are going so good? it doesn't make sense... he uses it when he needs it the least? I'm so tired of the ups and downs, been hurt and let down more times than I can count, really having a difficult time understandi...	by a thread	11	508	Sep 23, 2006 by faith
	Now What? (Preview) I'm new here, have been to a few f2f meetings. My husband is an A, been with him for 20 years, married for 9 of those years. He was out of control when I met him, still drank, but was better most of the time. In 2000, he went on a bender while on vacation in the Carribean, went to a Dr. down there and was tol...	Kelly M	6	239	Sep 23, 2006 by faith
	Feeling numb , just saw a fatal car accident & found my last 2 goats dead (Preview) We had just gone outside with our little dogs about an hour ago. 10pm, I heard a skid then a thud. I said it sounds like a car accident. Remember now, I live in a rural county. so we have almost complete silence out here. Our dogs started howling. We thought surely someone on the blacktop heard it and will go...	hmrnrnmm	7	674	Sep 22, 2006 by maresie2
	just need to vent (Preview) hi havent posted in a couple weeks..but this past weekend i went away to disney with my mother in law,daughter and granddaughter{went from sat to tuesday}on friday the day before we went my AH wanted to go out so i took him to the bar{he went to the bar that deals with drugs}well anyways i went to pick him u...	bev	6	411	Sep 22, 2006 by Jill
	Celebrating my growth in Alanon (Preview) It has been almost 6 weeks since my A husband and I were talking. We have been here many times and in the past it is around this time I start getting weak. I would be so devastated when my husband and I would argue and he would demand that I leave and tell me he wanted a divorce. He wo...	JulieLynn	2	297	Sep 22, 2006 by Karilynn
	the money stuff (Preview) As some of you know I have been working a pretty low wage job and not really getting that far with my plan b. I have the opportunity tomorrow to go interview for a much better paid job and also another interview on Monday. I am hoping to do like Andrea and others have to land a job despite the odds again...	maresie2	4	265	Sep 22, 2006 by Becky1
	I want this to be over...once and for all. (Preview) The A I've lived with for 6 years didn't come home last night. It's not the first time and I know it won't be the last. But my kids are 10 and 12 now and they "get it" that he isn't still working at 10 pm. I don't want them to think their successful mom is a sap when it comes to relationships and what she wil...	kicky	3	282	Sep 22, 2006 by Becky1
	boundary suggestions? (Preview) Hi, I'm working on my list of boundaries today because I know the A will be back in town soon and I want to be prepared. So far I have he doesn't stay the night at my house or on my property. He doesn't come here or call drunk or expect to see the kids under the influence. I think he's about to lose his license fro...	carolinagirl	2	265	Sep 22, 2006 by Becky1
	hugs and esh (Preview) Not ready to write a proper post just yet but would like a few hugs sent my way if you guys have any to spare. Had a big fight with my husband feeling okay but I have taken my wedding and engagement rings off today which I never do. Haven't made any decisions just feeling a little in limbo right n...	leo	10	706	Sep 22, 2006 by sandie123
	Please PRAY for me !! (Preview) Please pray for ME, i need my HP's strength to get thru this.. I need my HP's guidance, support and LOVE right now.. My husband needs his HP to guide him too..	Tammy	9	370	Sep 22, 2006 by sandie123
	directing my anger (Preview) I made a lethal mistake of telling the A I am going on a job interview. This morning he starts in at 4:30 the house is a mess, then he moves onto that I buy too much dog food (he has accused me publicly before of neglecting the dogs). Now he is off on a riff about his socks being missing.&nb...	maresie2	6	499	Sep 22, 2006 by megan
	detachment.... (Preview) Alright, so I attended my first Al-anon meeting on Monday. I was so scared because I didn't know what to expect, and I'm extremely shy on top of it. By the time my 1st step meeting was over, I was alot more relaxed and somewhat relieved. I was happy to know alot of other people are feeling the same frust...	mommaof2	4	373	Sep 22, 2006 by mommaof2
	Its funny when... (Preview) I emerge out of my cocoon to share my progress I have a "relapse" into old behavior. My A backed out of counseling yesterday and of course used all sorts of excuses to justify it. I went from that place of feeling good and happy regardless of what he does or feels right back into the poop of fee...	twinmom2	3	262	Sep 22, 2006 by hersh
	Response to - Letter to my AW (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Thank you all for your kind words. Speaking from my heart is new to me since joining this program. In my family of origin we almost never blurt out "I love you" to anyone. It was understood.... I guess. Well I acturally sent that letter to my AW. When we t...	rtexas	3	410	Sep 22, 2006 by twinmom2
	Feeling the sunshine after my removal from the pit of dispair (thanks for keeping the ladder safe all :) ) (Preview) Hi all, Well today was a great day, and still is becasue I am not asleep yet, close lol, but not yet. I really can't not remember much at work, it was so nuts :) just like me and just the way I like it. At the end of this month I will be completing my second term as an AmeriCorps member and lol I will be an alu...	Dolphin123	3	239	Sep 22, 2006 by hersh
	I had lost my ladder to get out of the pit of depsair, I found it here, again where it alwasy is! (Preview) Hi roomies, My family and I returned from our vacation on Sunday. It was a great trip and I was able to meet my neice and nephew for the first time. (Neice is adopted an extremly adorable 2 year old and my nephew is 12 weeks old.) Things were great. Hubby was such an amazing support and was...	Dolphin123	13	388	Sep 22, 2006 by hersh
	Letter to my AW (Preview) Dear ....... Last night you asked me a question. You said you needed to know if you had to stop drinking for me to show you any love and affection? Honey, it's not a simple question to answer. I can tell you this... I do love you, I always have. In the middle of our worst moments I sti...	rtexas	6	361	Sep 22, 2006 by Rita G
	I have heard... (Preview) I heard that an alcoholic or addict stops emotionally growing up when they start using. Has anyone else heard this? IE if they start using at 12 they act like 12 year olds and never grow up from there emotionally until they are sober for a good long time?	carolinagirl	7	392	Sep 22, 2006 by TLC2
	my self esteem crashing (Preview) Hi all, I've noticed my tendancy to people please a lot recently. I'm trying to undo this and create new boundaries for myself. I am actually quite surprised at how natural this was/is to me. I've come to the conclusion that my self esteem must actually be quite low. My Abf asks me what's wrong with me a lo...	annmarie	5	334	Sep 22, 2006 by annmarie
	Alphabet Grattitude list (Preview) Here is something fun to do. List things you are grateful for for each letter of the alphabet. Of course you don't have to post if you do not want to. I still have many more to think about. See how many you can do. A ALANON….of course B BRUCE…my husband C COMPASSION for the A D ...	Gailey	3	726	Sep 22, 2006 by tiredtonite
	Still having trouble (Preview) I am still having trouble getting into the chatroom. Was there last night after work, but can't get in this morning for meeting. It says I have been banned, something about my IP being on a "blacklist." I have absolutely no clue what is going on or why. Anothe person said they experienced simil...	horselover58	3	331	Sep 21, 2006 by John
	Feeling a little guilty (Preview) I was talking to a friend the other day trying to figure out why I couldn't just let go after all I have been through and I told her I couldn't stand the idea of him being with someone else. She asked me why? and I didn't know. Then she said you're afraid he's going to treat someone else like this? And I said No,...	carolinagirl	8	317	Sep 21, 2006 by lin0606
	What Now (Preview) Hello All- I am new here and have been looking around for a couple of days and havent seen what Im looking for...maybe just because there is no answer to the questions I have...I have been with my A for almost two years and feel like I have gave all I have to give, we have tried everything to make this w...	acjmom	11	291	Sep 21, 2006 by acjmom
	getting into chat room problem (Preview) I have not tried to get into the chat room for a long time. Today I decided to stop in on the 9:00 a.m. meeting. Cannot get in. This is what it says at the bottom of the white box: Connecting... Unable to conncet: java.net ConnectException: Connection refused: connect Please help!!!!	Gailey	2	256	Sep 21, 2006 by tea2
	Overcoming the characteristics... (Preview) Just a quick question on how to overcome the characteristics we developed in your experiences with As. Does it help to address the issues with a recovering A. Is that where the issues reside or does just working the program do it? Just curious.	Newbie	7	1335	Sep 21, 2006 by lin0606
	Is anyone else in this position? (Preview) I am sure there are some of you who have left your A and have children in common. How do you deal with them seeing the children but not getting sucked into getting back together? How do you deal with seeing them even if you don't want to?	carolinagirl	7	529	Sep 21, 2006 by lin0606
	One last thing about children (Preview) I promise this is my last one tonight but I wanted to take a minute to talk about something the last post brought up. My daugher (his step) and my AH have not gotten along for many years. He constantly finds fault with everything she does. Sometimes I even think he lies about things to put her in a bad light....	carolinagirl	8	270	Sep 21, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Honesty about my obsession (Preview) Hi Everyone, I have to vent, as many of you may remember, my ex bf A/CH and I split after he went to rehab, at the recommendation of his sponsor. No relationship in the first year, etc etc. I really understood and thought it best for me too. I held out some hope that we may reconcile an...	beachbaby	3	373	Sep 21, 2006 by Dolphin123
	begging and pleading for another chance... (Preview) Hello Just when I start to feel really good about my decision to divorce my A/cocaine addicted husband, so that I can get on with my life and have a happy future...... he calls me and begs me to come back. He says he promises that he won't use and will quit drinking if only I will come back to him. He says h...	artygirl	6	389	Sep 21, 2006 by Tiger2006
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.