The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I just want to thank Greta again for her post about the 'blame game'. I chatted online with my AH again tonight (in Shreveport now and still on his way here) and he threw in the marriage vow thing and talked about how he would never kick me out (I moved out of the house and he left on his own). I got caught in it and was getting angry for a second and then I remembered what you said about the blame game and having to always be right! Thank you, I think this is going to be the thing that give me my sanity! I stopped and said I am not going to talk anymore I don't want to say something mean. I noticed the sucking you described I am going to try to become an expert at noticing when I start to feel that churning in my stomach and just disengage right then.
The hardest for me is to admit wrong for something I know is his fault. I just have to make sure that my problem is me and my reaction not him and ALL he's done. I have to let it go and not get sucked in. I realized I was trying to argue my rightness. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!
You are very welcome ((( carolinagirl))). I am so glad my post yesterday helped you. Alanon is all about becoming aware of behaviors we want to change. I have just reacted without a thought for so long, awareness is a big step for me.
