|
|
mom of two babies scared
(Preview)
I am scared. I have been married to my husband for almost 7 years. I think he has been an alcolholic most of that but I have not admitted it to myself. His father and uncle are both hardcore alcoholics. I have written it off to him being young, to myself being too controlling etc. Now I realize that I was lyin...
|
nagal
|
12
|
574
|
|
|
|
HAD A GOOD MEMORY FROM CHILDHOOD
(Preview)
(((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))I was brought up with a drinker all my life. My dad, he is not like that today.(Thank Gawd), He can have a few drinks and be okay, his personality does not change nowadays. I no longer get anxious about his drinking. But for years my mind was a box of bad memories....
|
ally
|
1
|
539
|
|
|
|
how am I supposed to react?
(Preview)
I wonder if anyone has tips for me on how to "handle" the lying / sneaking etc. My husband tells me that he is no longer drinking "during the week" but I know(for a fact) that he is drinking and hiding it from me. Do I tell him I know and get accused of "keeping track" or snea...
|
nagal
|
11
|
741
|
|
|
|
LET GO AND LET GOD
(Preview)
((((((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))))) I came across this and felt I would like to share it with you. This is something I feel we can all strugle with at some time in our lives....I hope you get something from it. Let Go: Let God Fill Your Need By Mary Kupferle If you are anxious, tense, or concerne...
|
ally
|
4
|
3601
|
|
|
|
My disease, My program
(Preview)
As I was driving home from my meeting I was letting myself think thoughts that make me mad and sad. I stopped myself and thought "this is my disease". This is how I make myself miserable. No one else was in the car, just me, letting thoughts make me feel something I wasn't feeling. I was actual...
|
serendipity
|
4
|
463
|
|
|
|
I am obsessing!!
(Preview)
OMG - I cannot STOP obsessing today over my AH. I haven't seen or heard from him since he left the house Tuesday morning for work. Not a word. Now, you'd think that I'd be used to this as it has been his behavior for the last few years. Going off on his crack binges. The difference this time is that I have...
|
QOD
|
5
|
550
|
|
|
|
Alaska pics
(Preview)
Hi (((family))) Am back from Anchorage and had a great time. Although it's such a loooooong trip. 12 hrs from my door step to hubby's. I don't want to do it again for a while. It was after 1 a.m my time when we got there, but only 10:00 there and broad daylight..lol That's so weird. It never does get da...
|
Christy
|
6
|
543
|
|
|
|
Continue your recovery
(Preview)
From some of the Buddist texts. Continue your recovery, even if those you love continue in self destruction (something I am reminding myself alot lately...) Live in joy, In love, Even among those who hate. Live in joy, In health, Even among the afflicted. Live in joy, In peace, Even among the trouble...
|
Tiger2006
|
2
|
310
|
|
|
|
help in the next stage
(Preview)
hello all
haven't written in some time.....full time with work,kids,home and managing my now sober live-in boyfriends' moods and my reaction to them ( or attempt not to).
i asked him to move out today....after a year of him abusing himself and then 7 months of his sobriety. suprisingly not m...
|
Fifi
|
9
|
580
|
|
|
|
I'm so scared
(Preview)
I am watching my daughter disolve before my own eyes. She has seriuos medical problems from her alchohol use and is living across town with people who took her in from the street. Her 12 year old son lives with me. I think she is also showing signs of mental illness. I thought about having her committed bu...
|
mom1973
|
10
|
640
|
|
|
|
Little Miracles....
(Preview)
I am seeing little miracles going on around me and not quite sure how to process them other than thank God daily. Last night my AH (sober 5 mos) took our 14 yr old son to a youth group. When our son came home, the first thing he said to me was, "I am so proud of dad. We went to KFC after and I accidentally kn...
|
Loupiness
|
4
|
485
|
|
|
|
I keep repeating the 3 Cs....
(Preview)
I didn't cause it. I cannot control it. I cannot cure it. I guess I need some ESH here because every time he goes off on a "vacation" I remember that he was 25 years sober until I came into his life. For the last 5 years I have lost all trust in him because of the drinking binges. I have got to the poin...
|
Diva
|
18
|
1841
|
|
|
|
Absolutely bombarded
(Preview)
I saw the A yesterday and came away feeling drained to death. He managed to absolutely bombard me with demands and manipulate me. I felt totally put upon, distressed and fed up.
The norm.
I have levelled with the people he is staying with. They are willing to work with me. I feel like I am going to...
|
maresie2
|
5
|
532
|
|
|
|
More pointless fighting...
(Preview)
We were invited to a party last night and he we were both wanting to go, but then the anxiety set in when I though abt alcohol maybe being there - so I said "can you not drink?" "I'll just have a couple" YEAH RIGHT LOL!!!!! I'm not abt to put myself in a situation where I will look like th...
|
Gurl25
|
8
|
489
|
|
|
|
can't sleep, I feel numb.
(Preview)
My daughters friend who was17 died of an over-dose, they decided to take him off life support, there was so little brain activity, he went without oxygen for too long. I talked to my daughter about getting help for her addiction, for the first time she didn't disagree. I have cried all the tears I think...
|
gimmpy
|
13
|
531
|
|
|
|
I am feeling high levels of anxiety today!
(Preview)
My AH left for work Tuesday morning and I haven't seen or heard from him since. I thought that he might show up Wed night so that he could get up and go to work today but he was a no show. Now I am figuring there is no telling when he will turn up this time. I am leaving for my vacation on the 14th and he was suppos...
|
QOD
|
11
|
607
|
|
|
|
It has been a little more than a year...
(Preview)
He went out this afternoon and stayed about three hours. I think he has been drinking. He is avoiding me, because he knows I can detect it immediately. His voice has "that sound." I am convinced it will never end. OK, OK. Breathe. Keep myself calm and in order. I'll make it. Damn, I hat...
|
Diva
|
4
|
503
|
|
|
|
I need to be slapped....
(Preview)
I rarely lose my temper. In fact it drove my A nuts how I delt with my anger so quitely. But after my diagnoses,and the diabetes med making me so sick, I was a B to two of my friends... geez. raving lunatic. Apologized to both. one has forgiven me, The other well I told her if she does not talk to me, I am heading...
|
debilyn
|
4
|
436
|
|
|
|
What?? 4th of July and sober?
(Preview)
Who would have thunk? lol So after fireworks I called ah to see if he was sober so he could talk to the kids and he actually was. I asked how he managed to do that? and he said "the guys are out sitting by the fire drinking and I didn't want to be stupid and get drunk so I've stayed in my room all day" He...
|
Friendofyours
|
3
|
497
|
|
|
|
I am new here
(Preview)
I am new to this board but not to Al-Anon although it's been a couple of years since I went to a face-to-face meeting. I am really needing to start back with meetings and this will help in between. My AH is really sinking to the bottom but it's bringing me down. I can't let it but I am so depressed. We ar...
|
Mamallama
|
9
|
557
|
|
|
|
Update
(Preview)
Hi, I haven't been around too much lately - busy and sad time. My husband's cancer progressed faster than we expected it to, and he died last week. He died at home, just at the beginning of the journey we both dreaded - pain and incapacity, hospitals and tubes ... The last few weeks of his life had me as alm...
|
lin0606
|
26
|
670
|
|
|
|
Venting... well maybe not
(Preview)
(((Everyone)))) I just jumped on here because I had a twitch in the nerve between my eyebrow, so bad you could see it. Yep it's got to do with the A and I could vent away about what is going on but I was interupted by sirens which meant the start of our neighborhood parade. I love my neighborhood, and the pe...
|
Lunamoth
|
3
|
403
|
|
|
|
FOR MISS USA (AKA MARIA)
(Preview)
((((((((((((((((MISS USA))))))))))))))))) I know how your feeling about your dog...I also let my wee jack russell go 3 years ago.. She was nearlly 15 years old.. I kept her for ME....and I finally had to make the "Hardest" decision of my life... I staye with her, looking into her wee eyes...
|
ally
|
1
|
388
|
|
|
|
quick ? : What is
(Preview)
Hi friends,
I heard this term on TV last night and read it one of the posts. What is "tweaking?"
Since my H is recovering from addiction to prescription meds, I just like to be aware of the terms... just in case.
thanks!
hugs, Lee Ann
|
itsgot2bgd
|
6
|
443
|
|
|
|
It's about that time...
(Preview)
It has been almost a year since I moved out of the house and there is a one year waiting period for filing for divorce in NC. I am dirt poor and am wondering if anyone has any resources for attorneys who might possibly give a tidbit of direction in what I need to do to file for divorce. I am wanting to find out...
|
carolinagirl
|
6
|
387
|
|
|
|
What do you think?
(Preview)
Hi. I'm actually new here. I found the site about a year ago but then never returned. My live in BF and father of my baby has been arrested 5 times for DUI over the course of his adult life (45yrs old). I met him while he was in "recovery" and on house arrest. He does not have a DL (lost for life...
|
suzydawn
|
10
|
554
|
|
|
|
if you want to make god laugh, make plans for the future
(Preview)
I'm new to this forum. I attended Al-Anon maybe 4 years ago since I was with someone in NA. The past few years I've been with my best friend who is also in NA. He has 2 daughters I love madly and who love me too. We're getting married in September. He had three years clean when we met...but he relapsed last May...
|
camiliajojo
|
2
|
850
|
|
|
|
my mother and her "friend"
(Preview)
My mom has a boyfriend who is an A. He goes to AA and does alot of service work but is in a constant state of relapse. My mom grew up in an A home and is untreated ADD. Anyway, they fight, that is what they do. She abuses him and he is mean to her. He is the most annoying, strange man anyone has ever met. I think it w...
|
serendipity
|
2
|
529
|
|
|
|
HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!
(Preview)
(((((((Family))))))), May you all have a wonderful, safe, and Happy 4th of July! May we take a moment to honor those who are serving in our armed forces, past and present. Love and blessings to you and your family. Live strong, Karilynn, Hubby, and Pipers Kitty
|
Karilynn
|
5
|
369
|
|
|
|
Just in case you were wondering ...........
(Preview)
You haven't gotten rid of me yet . This past month has had so many highs and lows and thanks to this program, I've been able to process the lows and cherish and enjoy the highs. I haven't been able to respond as much to other's post (which I love to do to keep my 12th step work in progress). Sadly enough, I had...
|
Maria123
|
8
|
607
|
|
|
|
ALCOHOL OR NOT, ARE WE SO DIFFERENT
(Preview)
(((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) Ive just returned home from a face to face open meeting. Al-Anon and AA. Shared top table. And It was fantastic, the feelings, emotions I got tonight were so unreal. To listen to an Al-anon female sharing her story, and then to listen to a male AA member sharing his s...
|
ally
|
1
|
474
|
|
|
|
My family is driving me crazy!!!
(Preview)
I love my family - my parents, my 2 older sisters and my younger brother.....but they are driving me nuts. We have a pretty close relationship, talk about everything and are wide open typically. But ever since my AH's addiction to crack came to light, I find that I am distancing myself from them. And I...
|
QOD
|
9
|
588
|
|
|
|
I'm In OZ!
(Preview)
Well, here I am in Kansas. Things are going pretty well with my Mom, I just have to go in the other room now and then and BREATHE!!! Too much togetherness right now. Today went with my sis to take the recycleables to the recycle bins, and to grocery. Had to get out of Mom's house for a while! She had me corn...
|
Becky1
|
2
|
441
|
|
|
|
new identity
(Preview)
HI all, I have been getting a lot of backlash from my AH about my program and my coming to MIP. Don't know if he has read my posts but he does know my nick so I am going to change it. My new nick will be myturn. Thank you all for all of the support you have and continue to give me. Lynn
|
confused
|
6
|
493
|
|
|
|
goodbye to bubbles off topic
(Preview)
I first wanted to say that our entertainment industry lossed a great singer last night, beverly stiles. She made opera accesible and entertaing. She was the best soprano americahas ever produced. She will be missed. But don't they say that divas never die they just become the ledgend.....I guess I...
|
serendipity
|
3
|
396
|
|
|
|
I have to forgive to detatch?
(Preview)
Someone said this at a meeting tonight. Because if you don't forgive, you can't detatch because you'll keep getting sucked back in. It made sense to me. Another good reason to forgive. My problem is my motive for forgiving. Last year when my A was relapsing I had so much compassion for him and his diseas...
|
serendipity
|
12
|
767
|
|
|
|
patience pays off
(Preview)
Hi all-
Just wanted to update on how things are going in my world.
I looked back on my profile and saw that I have been a member here since March of 2005-- so much has happened since that time. I know that I could have never gotten thru it all without learning about alanon.
My addict(alcohol and var...
|
gknee
|
6
|
502
|
|
|
|
Starting to understand
(Preview)
Thanks to everyone who replied (and viewed) my posting about detaching. It's not what I thougt it was. Wierd, huh? I am a total hard-ass about certain things. One of those things is when people I am very close to and love relapse. Even though I have been sober for over three years, go to meetings, identif...
|
realestatepup
|
2
|
454
|
|
|
|
He talked to the kids.
(Preview)
I was surprised how my six year old spoke to him, both girls did. They said "dad, do you not like us anymore? Because you promised you would come this weekend and you didn't. You lied" I was like oh wooooooow! He said "it's a long story, I'll tell you later" and my daughter said &quo...
|
Friendofyours
|
1
|
299
|
|
|
|
Three for three
(Preview)
I think yesterday I finally got some energy back. It's a weird feeling, feeling essentially good, reasonably hopeful, and yet having NO ENERGY. I have always had a hard time reading my body's messages to me, and accepting it's needs. So I'm chillin' in a nice clean house and get a call from the sheri...
|
Kim65
|
9
|
567
|
|
|
|
Yep, "The Screw" made an appearance
(Preview)
Hi (((((Family)))))) Well I did it! Yesterday evening I told my story for the first time at a Speaker Meeting. It was an amazing experience, I highly recommend it!! The meeting was in San Antonio about an hour and a half from where I live and I and some friends from my home group drove over. We went a little...
|
david62
|
11
|
874
|
|
|
|
scared!
(Preview)
My daughter was camping out with friends, and they were all partying. She's 19 and another 18. Her other frined who is 17 over-dosed on cold medicine and is in a coma. His girl friend is only 15, so my daughter and the 18 were told taht they may be charged with endangering the wellfair of a minor. She"...
|
gimmpy
|
7
|
425
|
|
|
|
boundaries...great concept but not always effective...back to the drawing board
(Preview)
Boundaries are a great thing, but what if they are not respected. So what happens when they are not respected. Wouldn't it be great if we set a boundary and the A actually agreed to it. I have been on a long road with my AH and feel as though I am nearing an end, at least to the road I have been on. I spoke to a...
|
confused
|
5
|
486
|
|
|
|
Emotions
(Preview)
I need some opinions / experiences any of you've had in this regard: My emotions are off the wall. Sometimes I think that I need help, medication, something. But then I think, there's no possible way this is going to be helped as long as I'm with AH or at least as long as he's still in the throws of Aism. I'm e...
|
Gurl25
|
7
|
493
|
|
|
|
Apologies to gardengal.
(Preview)
A few days ago, in a post of mine, I responded in a rather unkind way to your reply to me. Looking back, I know I took your answer all wrong, and read into it that which was not intended to be there. I am sorry. Best wishes, Diva -- Edited by Diva at 22:42, 2007-06-30
|
Diva
|
3
|
424
|
|
|
|
Leaving
(Preview)
Well, only for a week to see my mom in another state. The A is not going, I will be 900 miles away. We have not made love in almost 2 months. He's not seeing anyone else, he is always home, or just across the street with his A friend (and his wife.) This morning, I laid in bed when I should have been up, hoping t...
|
Becky1
|
9
|
517
|
|
|
|
looking for some EH&S to get me by
(Preview)
Hello (((Everyone))). I am in Great need of some EH&S today. My mind is taking over and all I want to do is cry. i know this is not a bad thing as it helps to cleanse the soul but I need to get through my day. My dilemna is that now that my A is in AA and making all kinds of new female and male friends. I feel left...
|
DT1221
|
7
|
619
|
|
|
|
Can you say "No", and leave it as just an answer?
(Preview)
I can remember the days when I couldnt say "no" even though I didnt want to do a particular thing. I was a people pleaser and sometimes still am. I wanted people to count on me, I wanted to be the one they came to with problems , and you know I thought I knew all the solutions. Barely even knowing...
|
gardengal
|
10
|
857
|
|
|
|
Twinmom
(Preview)
I adore so many people here but I wanted to say out loud how much I appreciate Twinmom. She's pretty much in my boat and understand and she takes the time to make sure I am ok. She's just really special. That's why this board isn't like any other. People genuinly care about one another and even though we do n...
|
Friendofyours
|
2
|
404
|
|
|
|
Count Down To "Married"
(Preview)
Rose and I are pretty excited about our wedding that is right around the corner. July 7th, 2007. Just days away. Our families will be sitting in the same rooms for the first time... oh gawh... two dysfunctional families celebrating with us LOL Friends from Al-Anon, AA and NA will be present... we a...
|
John
|
16
|
800
|
|
|
|
National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism
(Preview)
I've been doing some soul searching. Prior to being married to an a I never really thought about the problem, or how many people might be addicted, or how many people might be effected by someone else's addiction. However, since I joined al-anon and began counting the numbers, it just seemed too vas...
|
ditto
|
0
|
307
|
|
|
|
No more sanity! Help!!
(Preview)
I've taken 15 steps backward I believe. My husband got out of rehab last Monday and stayed at my house ( we've been separated since April) for the week until he could move into the halfway house on Saturday. Everything was great. He was going to his meetings, we were getting along. We even went to the park...
|
karrele
|
4
|
408
|
|
|
|
No more sanity! Help!!
(Preview)
I've taken 15 steps backward I believe. My husband got out of rehab last Monday and stayed at my house ( we've been separated since April) for the week until he could move into the halfway house on Saturday. Everything was great. He was going to his meetings, we were getting along. We even went to the park...
|
karrele
|
14
|
551
|
|
|
|
off topic, need help, experience please
(Preview)
hello, well you guys know I have been feeling very rough. Ok I am eating the way I am suppose to since Thursday. Feel absolutely awful. Like living with the flu, which I rarely get. stomach flu. The med is called,"Metforman" I have to take it twice a day with food. plus I have my vitamins and min...
|
debilyn
|
13
|
633
|
|
|
|
Want everything yesterday
(Preview)
I am so much better in a crisis than I am in everyday life. Now the A is not homeless. I am not in imminent danger of pennilessness and leading a tolerable existence I can't sit still..
I want it all tomorrow.
I know this is one of the traits that leads me towards the A. I will have to do a lot of work on h...
|
maresie2
|
3
|
491
|
|
|
|
encouragement and thanks
(Preview)
I'm feeling a bit uneasy - after the past 4 weeks of binging my A finally made it to a rehab center last Friday. He is in a safe place and I feel a sense of relief now. But now the hard part, I finally spoke to him today by phone and once again reiterated the message I've been saying all along...."I love...
|
twinkie
|
2
|
415
|
|
|
|
I'm alive.
(Preview)
Just wanted to say hi to everyone, I haven't posted in a little bit. I am alive and had a great 4 day vacation from my kids 2 at a fancy hotel for a conference and 2 at home alone. It was fabulous and the first time I have been away from them for a long long time. My life is in slight turmoil at the moment, I may h...
|
carolinagirl
|
3
|
384
|
|
|
|
"This is only a test..."
(Preview)
Right now outside of the computer lab, the emergency sirens for the university/local AFB are blaring. It's no emergency; it's the first Monday of the month. The first Monday of the month, the university, the local governments, and the local AFB go through the emergency catastrophe procedures, go...
|
Tiger2006
|
1
|
425
|
|
|
|
An example of the distorted thinking
(Preview)
So my sober AH was pouring himself a glass of iced tea last night, in a huge glass mug. He looked at the mug for a moment and said "I never did use this for it's intended purpose." So I said "What purpose was that?" "Well, it was supposed to be my drinking mug when I went TDY.&...
|
ShelBell
|
7
|
989
|
|
|
|
trying to detach
(Preview)
Hi everyone.... I am new to Al Anon but not to AA. I am sober 3 years and counting. But, the person I am in a relationship with is a chronic relapser! I am trying to let go, let him hit bottom, but..... HOW!!! This whole stupid love thing keeps getting in the way! I hate that feeling in the pit of my stomach when...
|
realestatepup
|
5
|
489
|
|