The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Tomorrow my husband and I will attend the Funeral Mass of a dear homelsss friend, Kevin, who died on the streets. We ministered to Kevin with prayer, kindness and positive encouragement. The disease of alcoholism claimed his dear life and he was drinking mouthwash in his final months to satisfy the urge for the substance. When working short-lived sobriety episodes, he was challenged by irritable mood swings, impatience and cynicsim. We loved him where he was at and encouraged him while he would stay at the homeless shelters. This world was too difficult for him. I believe his HP took him to a gentler place to minister to him. I witnessed the struggle and heartfelt attempts to recover. I admired the gusto with which he knew he could do it "this time." I felt the emptiness within him as I would hug him and his inability to genuinely hug us back. There was a void none of us could meet for him. It was deep, like a black abyss. Yet, through this all, I saw him as a big teddy bear: his bark worse than his bite unless one was in his path during an alcoholic rage and intoxication when he often took out anyone in his path. You know, the Jekyl/Hyde psychosis fueled by the alcoholic substance. Please lift Kevin up in prayer. I know his HP has him in a gentler, kinder place. What this world could not do for him, his HP will. May we all come to see this as a disease which overtakes the dignity and grace of otherwise, those who are just like us, but can't resist the urge which overcomes them and owns the person we love. Bless us all, everyone! God Bless Kevin and those he loved and those who will continue to love him. Be happy Kevin, we will miss you.
He is in my prayers. My dear best friend has passed also from the same thing. I understand the emptyness and lack of understanding. She was also to the point that she had to have something to not feel so horrible. I believe God does take them up to heaven to protect them. Alcoholim is so bad that even God can not save them on earth. It makes them use their free will which God gave them. He has no choice but to take them back home. There they are warm and safe. Our dear friends are at peace and I believe that. God Bless, your in my prayers.
I believe that HP has your friend so I'm sending my prayers your way. It's those who are left behind that carry the pain and sorrow.
I'm praying HP will carry you thru this and remind you of the success of those who do find recovery. Your friend was blessed to have you in his life-- someone who could see him and not just the disease. It's a gift to be able to give compassion to an A -- there is a cost to it though, how much easier it is to build a wall and try to forget the person inside the disease. So I am glad for your friend that he had you in his life, you are the blessing. I'm praying HP will heal your heart.
Prayers for your family as well as Kevin and his. He is in a better place and suffering no more. He was blessed to have your family around him, as you were blessed by him. He gave you an incredible gift of love and friendship even if he could not always show it. May those memories be of comfort to you. Rest in peace Kevin.
Love and blessings to you and your family. Karilynn, Hubby and Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.