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Thank yous
(Preview)
I am very appreciative of all the replies I received. Thank you to everybody. I feel like a broken record, and know I will probably be repeating myself again. This has been the most traumatic experience of my life (and I thought I'd been through some things). But, your support and understanding is he...
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klm4446
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1
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415
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repairing the damage
(Preview)
I spoke to the consumer credit place today. They want a huge payment every month. I've actually made more than that payment monthly for the past few months. I must admit huge gops of rage came up at the A. The money I spent on him, how I tried till I was almost vertical to get him to sanity.
I am not rushing i...
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maresie2
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3
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294
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Ready to take the plunge
(Preview)
Hi all. I'm heading to my first Al-Anon meeting this Friday and a little nervous. Have a wonderful husband who has binged off and on for years (I know that sounds like it doesnt make sense.) He's gone to a doctor who encouraged him to go to AA, however he refuses. He takes Campral...but it hasnt stopp...
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meerkat
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6
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580
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Managing our anger and responding to other's
(Preview)
Anger helps straighten out a problem like a fan helps straighten out a pile of papers. --Susan Marcotte Some of us have temper tantrums. Like black clouds, we threaten an outburst at any moment. Other people learn to check us out for storm warnings. They want time to clear out or at least to put on a prote...
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Tiger2006
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7
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528
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Another Psycho Denial Issue
(Preview)
I don't know how to phrase this without really ruining the whole anonymity thing, so I'll just try to be clear and to the point. When I met my AH (12 years ago) he told me he had HepC. We've always taken precautions with eachother and with the kids (no sharing toothbrushes ect...). I had to get a HepC test d...
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RainyJamie
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11
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554
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no screaming and shouting
(Preview)
Guys am on holidays, no shortage of drama, raging toothache, safe had to be fixed in room, had all passports, flights back etc, instead of a having a fit while waiting for repair man got on this site, love it, made a gratitude list instead of having a fit, this could have happened just as we were going home...
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maire rua
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4
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518
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update on tooth and safe and all
(Preview)
Hi all, did a temporary filling on the tooth, have an appointment for dentist next tuesday, and got some stuff from the chemist, yea, seems to be ok, safe is fixed, and am going down memory lane with this holiday as the last time my a brother was with me and my youngest son, no comparisons. I am having some...
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maire rua
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0
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262
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much better today
(Preview)
I am feeling much much much better today. Absolutely nothing about my situation has changed. I am still broke, fed up, tired, worn out, living in absolute craziness. I may get fired today and they may hold off for a few weeks. Who knows. I know I will deal with it whatever happens. I know I can deal with it t...
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maresie2
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5
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400
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Granddaughter Born Last Night
(Preview)
My granddaughter was born last night, she was not supposed to be here until today! The docs were going to induce this morning, so she was checked in last night, 3 weeks early. When they checked the mommy she was dialated to 3! Checked into hospital at 5 after a big Lone Star Steakhouse dinner, water bro...
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Becky1
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13
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597
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Affected by Alcoholism? Who Isn't?
(Preview)
Sometimes when I look at people around me outside of the program, I get the feeling that I'm looking at the "other side". Those people who have been fortunate enough to have gotten through life so far without a significant alcoholic in their lives. They don't have the isms, they don't see...
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barisax
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12
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728
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Lessons from the Loss of a Friend
(Preview)
I got some really sad news yesterday. A person that came to one of my face to face al-anon groups took her own life on Thanksgiving Day. When I got the news, I could not believe it. I still see her smiling face and hear her laughter. She was such an enthusiastic person, the person I knew. She was one of...
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david62
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17
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682
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For Kissers
(Preview)
I sent you a private message yesterday. Did you get it? Gail
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Gailey
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0
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260
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VERY SAD NEWS TO SHARE---ESH requested
(Preview)
Hello family,I have an urgent need for prayer. Something I have been trying to prepare for has occured tonight. My sweet birdie, Angel, passed away last night. I feel absolutely numb, except for pain in my heart.My friends I spoke to tonight have told me that I did all I could to keep her alive, but it wa...
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hippietrippiechick
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10
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680
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Thanks to all
(Preview)
I want to thank everyone for your support since the passing of my son James... James was a talented artist and tattoo artist .. and also a person with this disease of alcholism/additction... and he found bottom on Nov 7th 2007.... for those who have been asking and of course anyone who would like to se...
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NightWatcher
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16
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489
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hard times
(Preview)
I learend today that I am going to leaving this job I have been in for almost 8 months. They are going to let me go. I may not be here beyond the end of this week. I have really super struggled at this job as teh commute is horrendous and the woman I work for is horrible. I have also been doing a second job and I am a...
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maresie2
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10
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693
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I need support
(Preview)
My AH "disappeared" over a week ago. Apparently he had lived out of his car for a number of days. He then, through his work at the hotel, was given a room to use until he could find a place to rent. He called Friday and wanted to see our daughter. We agreed he would come over this afternoon to s...
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Heather72
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11
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635
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Grateful for tools and change....
(Preview)
Hello everyone!! I just wanted to drop a line and let you all know how wonderful this board is, and how much I truly believe my life has changed from this program. I just cherish the tools and wisdom I have learned from Alanon. I am so grateful to have learned that if things go badly in my life, I can reach ou...
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hersh
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4
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467
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meeting my needs
(Preview)
The more I pull away from the A the better I am able to discern who can and can't meet my needs. I live in an insane household where everyone is afraid, enmeshed and every single day is total chaos and confusion. There is abolutley no doubt for me that there is no one there who can meet my needs. This situatio...
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maresie2
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4
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364
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Letting Go
(Preview)
I found this recently and felt it warrented sharing, I hope you find it as helpful on this subject as I have. Barb *To ``let go'' does not mean to stop caring. It means I can't do it for someone else. *To ``let go'' is not to cut myself off. It's the realization I can't control anothe...
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Mobirdie
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7
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516
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Applying for a 2nd job tomorrow
(Preview)
Hi everyone, My rent is going up $90 per month, gas prices have risen, and my daughter needs glasses. I will be applying for a 2nd job down the road. I am hoping the manager will allow me to bring my 10 year old to work with me. There's only one way for me to find out, and that is to ask. As things are going, I have...
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kissers
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4
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338
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Update
(Preview)
My holiday was good, we had lots of pies and junk as that was what each child chose to have LOL. We watched lots of movies, and went out to see Enchanted. I worked several days and made extra money and we enjoyed that at the theater and having lunch before. Got free pics of the kids with Santa at walmart. ...
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carolinagirl
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5
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470
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job interview result
(Preview)
Yes, the lady got the job and rang me to give me some interview tips this morning, I stayed calm and congratulated her and told her I was on holidays and needed to go, grrrh, grrh, grrh, thank you all, I needed to do that, still delighted I went for interview and did not get intimidated out of it,
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maire rua
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7
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410
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Positive Affirmations
(Preview)
I found this online: I can be a winner. I am the best friend I have. I have solved problems like this before. I have the ability to handle this. I am a capable human being. I deserve to love and to be loved. I am a skillful and artistic person. I can show others a good example. Letting go is best for them and for m...
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kissers
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4
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4245
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Cant put a name to a topic
(Preview)
Well just got back from the wedding that I went to with my A but we are currently having space, I really hope its not permanantley! I first turned up and we were genuinley pleased to see each other, he told me how nice I looked and he was so smart in his morning suit. It was hard day for both of us, in the sense of...
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chick29
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3
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516
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My original post insane and obsessional thinking
(Preview)
Having carried on posting which is the good thing I hope, please refer to my last post on the original that is my response, I just think of this a forum as a circle I hope we all continue to meet each other in our needs. looking back perhaps my response sounds angry, but its honest i wish i could get to a ftf jus...
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chick29
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7
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771
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Insane obsessional thinking
(Preview)
Well where do I start if I were to right down everything wrong my alcohlic boyf has done over the past four years people would think I was absolutley insane to have stayed but the truth is that sometimes it actually feels like it hurts more to actually sit with splitting up and him not being there than to pu...
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chick29
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13
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871
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New to all of this, to stay or to go??
(Preview)
Hello, I just found this site last night after doing some searches on AA in an effort to help my H. I had never heard of al anon before so that's how new I am to all of this. My H of 12 years I fear is an A. We have 3 small children. He never drinks at home it is always at the local bars. I also feel he suffers fr...
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HopeinVA
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10
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858
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Who do they think they are?
(Preview)
I have some? I would like to ask?What gives a addict the right to give some body a choice they have to make? The way I look at it is for how long did we beg and plea for them to stop using or go for help? They think they have the right to bark orders at every one. I understand fully that they are sick but they are all...
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Allie
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2
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500
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The Evil Eye
(Preview)
Hi everyone! Some of you might know about the evil eye- it's basically the wrath incurred from envy. I think it's like a supernatural superstition where if you have something good, you might make other people jealous, and that jealousy turns into bad vibes that eventually make something bad happen....
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RainyJamie
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7
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770
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moving on mixed bag
(Preview)
When I was with the A one of my huge huge fears was that when I wa sout on my own I would not be able to make it financially. Of course I had some idea of how hard it will be. I have been on a contract job for a few months now. I am pretty certain this contract will not last more than another 2 months. That is good and b...
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maresie2
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4
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442
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HP has a sense of humor
(Preview)
When it came to recovery from child abuse issues I did a geographic. I did not see or talk to my family of origin for more than 10 years. Then I briefly very briefly for a year or two interaced with my mother before she died. That interaction was very very distant. I thought I had put all my child abuse stuff...
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maresie
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5
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526
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vent
(Preview)
so much sadness. So much grieving...I just met for a few hours with my A today for the first time in several months. We have not lived together for 2 years but I moved to a distant place so we see each other quite rarely. We have been trying to work on things thru email, phone, etc. but its just been a giant fai...
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Jean4444
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7
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459
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Meditation
(Preview)
This subject came up at a meeting this week and the question was asked "How do you meditate?" I would love to hear how the rest of you meditate, what processes do you go through to get there? Thanks Barb
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Mobirdie
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6
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386
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one day at a time
(Preview)
ok, so holiday weekends can be every emotion and I am so full of so many emotions it has made me weepy. At times it is good to have extra people around and at times we look forward to the regular daily routine. It is time for me to focus on one thing, one day or one moment at a time. Change is constant which in...
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ddub
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5
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387
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detaching with love
(Preview)
Well I know it ain't been roses lately, baby, it's just been thorns And no matter what we do, nothing seems to change Love has always been my shelter, for you it's been a storm But for a while I thought we'd almost beat the rain Now there's a hole here in my pocket where all my dreams have gone Fallen out like s...
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norwood
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1
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363
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Thanks for being over
(Preview)
About all I can say about Thanksgiving is "thank God it is over"....now on to the next holiday. I maintained my resolve to not allow anyone or anything to create chaos on Thanksgiving; that was successful. We had a quiet day with my spouse . Our son came for a simple meal and we all managed to c...
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omajoy
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3
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491
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My First Holiday Alone
(Preview)
Happy Thanksgiving All! I'm actually just getting off the phone with my AH as I type this and dang near ready to cry because I'm not there with him. We've been separated almost 11 months now...(I left him)...and I thought I would be happy to be spending it "My Way&quo...
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afmom03
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4
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1017
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ps, the baby
(Preview)
Tis my grandson,Sprout. His given name is Noah Orion. His moms name is Raini Spring. Sadly his dad is A. Thankfully I had many years of MIP to be able to guide Rain when she asked me for help. Now our Sprout is safe,sees his Daddy safely. And Rain knows to look for red flags. I am grateful to MIP becuz I looked...
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debilyn
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4
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306
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job interview need to vent
(Preview)
Hi All, went for a major job interview today, did well, only problem is knew the job was gone before I went for it. Nine candidates were called and the lady in the job whom I am acquainted with was well able to let me know all the ins and outs. I have met her three times since yesterday and eventually I was sick...
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maire rua
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3
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472
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My two cents.
(closed)
(Preview)
A couple of replies to a post have been directed more at my response than the original poster. Why would that be? I'll tell you. When a poster writes that the A bf is abusing her both mentally and physically, I am not going to say, "Go to AlAnon meetings so that you can acquire the tools you need to make...
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Diva
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19
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891
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weddings and al anon
(Preview)
When I first met my alcoholic, I very quickly realised it was too much too bear and sought out help, that how I found al anon a lady who later became a good friend rang me up and later met me and took me to my first ftf meeting. If I'mhonest I played at it and the programm, it was handy I always got a lift and at the...
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chick29
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3
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509
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Post-holiday thoughts
(Preview)
Hi All, So yesterday was my first holiday without my ah in over 20 yrs, and it wasn't so bad. The hardest part was when he showed up right before we were to leave (to drop off item requested by son) and started playing football with the kids. I could tell he was sad and was stalling. Earlier in the day he had...
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Loupiness
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4
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407
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I love this program
(Preview)
I had thought that I would be spending Thanksgiving alone with the kids. No big deal, I was ok with the whole idea. I threw out an offer to a friend in the program. They accepted and we had such an awsome time. It was so nice to be with people who had no hidden agenda, no need to put down or gossip, no negativity...
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serendipity
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3
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356
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thank you for reading
(Preview)
I spent thanksgiving with my sister and her husband and my niece and nephew (both adults) and my mom and some neighbor friends of my sister....it was all very delicious and lovely but let me tell you, I was not really there at all. I feel like I slipped- not the bawling my head off because I set myself up aga...
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Jean4444
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3
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521
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I talked to my sponsor
(Preview)
Thank you all for your ESH re: my problems with my sponsor. It really kicked me in the ass (which I needed). I called her and we talked for quite a while. We are now on a weekly check-in schedule to talk each Thurs regardless if anything is "going on" for me or not. I feel much much much better. tha...
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Jean4444
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0
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256
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It's been 2 weeks!!
(Preview)
Does this mean that in another 7 days it will have been 21 and the squeezing sensation in my chest will go away and I'll feel like I can get a deep breath finally? You know someone told me last night that the actual physical addiction / brain receptors for nicotine go away after 3 days and the rest is just h...
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carolinagirl
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2
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295
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Video Input was appreciated (Please Read)
(Preview)
I got over 500 replies regarding the Miracles In Progress Aftercare Recovery House Video. Your comments suggestions, questions and opinions were fabulous and surely encouraged me and will help me with polishing it up a bit as I move forward with this endeavor. Many, many thanks to those who are p...
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John
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3
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508
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THE SAME OLD STORY---WITH A TWIST
(Preview)
(((((Dear Friends)))) Happy Thanksgiving to all of you! Well today was a short work day for me as I work in retail. The A was up early this morning and by the time I left for work at 8:00AM he was drunk. This has become a matter of course for thanksgiving, so I wasn't too surprised. I was at peace all day...
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cookie1971
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2
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685
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"Let it begin with me"
(Preview)
As soon as you get some sense of contact, you want to be teachers of others. This is a big mistake. -Ta-sui I know many of us will be with family in the upcoming weeks, and on today. There is a temptation to take their inventory, now that we have "seen the light and found the path." I have found, a...
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Tiger2006
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3
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1165
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Coloring Therapy
(Preview)
I found this online after looking for codependency recovery information. http://www.coloringtherapy.com/ There are free mandalas online if you google them.
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kissers
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6
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452
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My Child Within
(Preview)
My Child Within I found my child within today, For many years so locked away, Loving, embracing, needing so much, If only I could reach in and touch. I did not know this child of mine, We were never acquainted at three or nine, But today I felt the crying inside, I'm here I shouted, come reside. We hugged ea...
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kissers
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3
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498
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where to sends cards and gifts to john and men.
(Preview)
I have been visiting here infrequently, unfortunately, but am happy to say my son has been clean and sober for a year now, married, and just opened a business. I feel with the intervention I saved my son's life. In return, I would like to send cards and gifts to the men in the house. How do I do this?
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izzymom
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2
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445
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Grandbaby to Arrive Tuesday!
(Preview)
My daughter is expecting, and we weren't expecting the baby until Mid-December, but she is having the labor induced Tuesday morning. Whew. Serenity prayer needed! LOL I am just in shock, lots to do before then.......daughter is doing well, they are just concerned the baby isn't growing fast eno...
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Becky1
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3
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462
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hi everyone
(Preview)
hi everyone its been a long time since ive been on i sort of gave up things have been awfull my son was framed for a murder on 17th dec 2005 he got a life sentance last year of 15 and half years, we now have a new legal team for him hoping to get an appeal or re trial my daughter tried to take her own life my brother...
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jeannie024
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5
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401
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How is Al-Anon viewed by the A?
(Preview)
I posted the other day about my mom leaving my A dad after almost 30 years of marriage. What I didn't say was that a few months prior to my mom leaving him I had attended an Al-Anon group that I wanted my mom to attend as well. I gave her some literature to it along with some group phone numbers etc. Well sh...
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Hopeless in AZ
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18
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894
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just wondering......
(Preview)
Been quite a week yet at this moment I feel quite calm and breathing alot to slogans so I don't get anxious about what if's during the holiday hoopla. It takes a lot of focus for me to stay on one day at a time or like I read in another post, one task at a time. I also have been thinking about this: "Pos...
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ddub
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3
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490
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quick update )c:
(Preview)
A few years back my very brain damaged A used some wrestling thing on me and threw me to the ground. Hurt my shoulders and knees. Now the knee has weakened to the point I have torn my meniscus. My tail bone is cracked, my foot is tore up and my shoulders are so painful. Then we he the carpal tunnel in the right h...
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debilyn
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4
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475
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HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
(Preview)
((((((((((Family)))))))))), Just wanted to take a few minutes to wish you all a very blessed and Happy Thanksgiving. I know there are lots of families who are traveling, may your journey be safe. May your loved ones arrive safely. To those of you who have family and friends serving in the military...
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Karilynn
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3
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302
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Relapse + Honesty = Serenity? (long)
(Preview)
((((((((Family))))))), A very good Sunday morning to you all. I wanted to share with you something that happened this past week. As you can probably tell from the title, hubby did indeed relapse again a couple of weeks ago. Well last Sunday while I was getting ready for work I found a bottle underne...
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Karilynn
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14
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825
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How will you be spending the holiday?
(Preview)
I am going to have the kids pick two items each that they want to have and then make all of them. We are going to put up the new fake xmas tree :) and I'll be working wed and fri night and all day sat. Perhaps some shopping friday? But I swore I wouldn't buy a thing till dec. 1. Definitely shopping for food to...
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carolinagirl
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7
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450
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