The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Thinking back to last year during the holiday, it was a miserable time. My AH had quit drinking in October, but was abusing his RX meds. He was grouchy and irritable.
During the course of the past year he started methadone to kick the RX abuse, that lasted until this past September. I am 99% sure he is still using/abusing.
He has recently come out of the closet with his drinking, meaning he is openly drinking in front of me instead of hiding it. The crazy thing is that he is HAPPY again.
This is where my gratitude for alanon and many of you comes into play. I have learned why is so happy....he has his best friends back in his life. I have learned how to detach myself from his problems and keep things good for me and the kids. I have learned the importance of talking with my kids about alcoholism.
I know what is coming in the future with my A, he revovles on the same circle I have heard many others mention. But for now I will make the best of his distorted happiness and give my kids and I a happy holiday season that they will be able to look back on with happy thoughts.
Thank you all for being here and letting me share.
Deno you are an inspiration. One day at a time. I have recently noticed that I have a choice now when I face a crisis: am I going to absorb all the bad things going on or all the good things going on? Because there are good things happening during a crisis, also, its just that I was not taught/trained/role modeled to see 'em!! There are lots of loving people around me who are not A's and I need to focus on them during crisis. Not the A's. thank you for your share, I too, was in a fairly horrible place last year at this time- I had just finished a 12 week DV survivors class and was just getting the hang of al-anon which I was 5 months into at the time. I was a mess but on the right road because now I am doing much better although things have not changed that much for my AH. I need to keep the focus on me- he will do whatever he needs to do, just like you said.
It's amazing, this program really does work if you work it doesn't it?? You are doing a great job and I hope that you have a very serene holiday season!!
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Do not be anxious about tomorrow; tomorrow will look after itself. The Bible, from Courage to Change, p.138
