Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

wallsal55 · wallsal55

NOW is the only moment we have, and that's already gone.

jaysbaby · jaysbaby

Hi everyone... just an update... My AH has started taking Seroquel for his Bipolar about 7 days now. He promised that he would stop drinking and drugging, and take his meds and stop the partying. He did not come home until 11:30pm lastnite. Please keep in mind, that he is disabled, and doesn't have a j...

Nicole · Nicole

I just wanted to share how much I'm loving Alanon. I have been going for about 3 years and just recently started really getting involved and working a "good" program and it feels so good. I'm only on the first step but this time I get it. I'm understanding how it works. I don't get 2-12 yet but I'...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

Even though I feel like my program is pretty strong I still struggle with wanting certain people to act, behave and 'be" a certain way. I will most likely struggle with this a little all my life. At least now, I can step back and observe this behavior and make changes to correct it. I know that when...

henryg · henryg

AH is in rehab and says he's not drinking but sometimes when I get home he seems kind of impaired, like his speech is off and very emotional and even a bit stumbly sometimes. He says in rehab they told him that this can happen as the body adjusts to being without alcohol but it triggers me so much because it...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family)))), A very good morning to you all on this hot, humid and sticky Wednesday. I thought I would update you on a few things. First of all, hubby is hanging in there. The doctor started him on fluxomine which makes him extremely dizzy. This is normal. He can't do much as it takes alot out of...

mslouise · mslouise

Basically, this post is just to vent. I have been very insecure these last couple of days. Not sure why...could be because my bf slipped one day last week...could be pms...who really knows. I do ususally get weird around my pms days, so maybe that's what it is??? Anyways, here is my vent: the last...

carosie · carosie

Dear MIP family, I am back home after my brother's death. It was/is a very sad time for me. I loved my brother very much. We were the two oldest of six and grew up together and no matter where we were we always kept contact and knew that the bond we had as children was strong. My siblings who drink and who a...

Minnehaha · Minnehaha

Ok people, it's me again....I'm not sure if I have a question or just need to be heard. My husband is a recovering A but his new drug of choice is his adult daughter. We had about the millionth discussion about her and him last night. She treats him like cold leftovers, all the while thinking she is a gre...

greta · greta

This morning I got up and started out with an old habit that I wish my brain would unlearn! I started going through my pity pot list. This was how my days started before alanon. It would start with my first waking moment. I would replay my list of gripes, resentments until I had a terrible attitude set...

maresie · maresie

6 months ago a friend of mine suggested I get rid of my dogs. He thought it was best I get rid of them because he knew what was better for me than I did. I became incredibly distraught and felt abandoned. 6 months later her emails me and suggests I give him my sisters address in case something happens to me. Ke...

Flutterbye · Flutterbye

Hi all, This is my first post. My father is an alcoholic. He drank so much that he has possibly given himself irreversible brain damage, in the form of short-term memory loss. He broke his hip last summer and was hospitalized for three months due to: 1. The Hip, 2. The bed sore, 3. And the DT...

maresie · maresie

As you all know I have significant issues with my roommates to say the least. I really want to make them all dysfunctional and me functional. The truth is that many many times I find it super hard to be civil and not be rude or not be absolutely exasperated. I'e been aware that my closest roomate (in proxi...

charlescharles · charlescharles

tired today..a little bored..a little angry..a little lonely..a little hungry meeting this morning..therapy this afternoon...i think i'll see a movie tonight..or read a book i just feel a bit shot out at the moment one of those hump day wednesdays a guy in the meeting this morning spoke of his life....

Diva · Diva

I could wring someone's neck!!! Knowing, I suppose, that we love cats, some jerk has put a tiny kitten in our fenced back yard. I would guess her to be three to four weeks old. She looks healthy, but does have some fleas. I telephoned our county Humane Association, for whom I used to volunteer. They adver...

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

Just thought I'd give ya'll an update on the "situation" with my ex a b/f. As some may remember, after being apart for several months, my ex and I sorta rekindled a friendship. Well to make a long story short, it started to go a little too far. I had my guard up though (thankfully) and knew wh...

joyoma · joyoma

Today was my consult with thoracic surgeon for the lung nodules discovered in my cancer check-up in June. Things are moving way way too fast for me, but have to cope. Am scheduled for surgery on Monday morning. Will be in SCU for 24 hours and then in hospital for several days. This is ten times more up...

JenniferN · JenniferN

Acting....not reacting...THAT is my struggle since last night. He came home an hour and a half late from his meeting. He said he went to Shoney's with some people from the group. I never asked. I didn't REact. I ACTED. I did NOTHING. I said NOTHING. I wasn't being hateful, didn't project an attitude, an...

Gared · Gared

I've been posting before about my experience with my ex A who has been in my life. I know that I am going through the grieving process and right now I'm in the pissed off stage. Gawd am I pissed off. He sounds so happy in Florida and he's living his life and doing his own thing and I'm still dealing with the...

afglin · afglin

I was in chat this week and a memebr in there had jsut returned from the Internaional confernence and was talking abouta new AlAnon book. I called WSO to get the ordering information. It is called Discovering CHoices The price is $15 and there is $7 shipping (up to abut $87 and then it is 8%. Iordered 6 a...

Minnehaha · Minnehaha

I have a question on interpretation of parts of the Just for Today "pledge" or however you would define it. The first paragraph talks about not concerning yourself about solving your entire life's problems, but just handling today's situation, handling something that would "ap...

charlescharles · charlescharles

tired today..a little bored..a little angry..a little lonely..a little hungry meeting this morning..therapy this afternoon...i think i'll see a movie tonight..or read a book i just feel a bit shot out at the moment one of those hump day wednesdays a guy in the meeting this morning spoke of his life....

charlescharles · charlescharles

wokeup this morning with a sort of emotional hangover from the day before when i went to two meetings had conflict with my mate and generally..well..did some step work and talked to my higher power..i think i really just wore myself out yesterday one day at a time..i know..but maybe the spirits were di...

TK · TK

Does anyone know anything about this topic? I'm afraid a loved one of mine is getting into this crap. On their days off, all they do is look at this junk or play games on the other computer. I don't know how to approach this person or even what to say. I need help with this.

Becky1 · Becky1

Tomorrow I have to go to court for the restraining order I filed against my AH, so I could at least have a little peace and quiet and get my stuff moved out of the house. Almost everything is moved, I just have a couple more things there, and as of tomorrow, I plan to stay at the apartment. I have not even stay...

charlescharles · charlescharles

..seems to be on between my ex and my present girlfriend..i am staying out of it..i feel somewhat nuetral all though i guess my allegience...well..my allegience is to me...i feel like they can beat each other down any way they want..i need need need to stay out of it i am basically convinced it has nothi...

angel66 · angel66

My AH is always a happy drunk until tonight. He really frightened my daughter and me. He goes to play trivia at the bar on Tues nights which is over around 10 pm. He came home at 1 am and from what my daughter said, he sat down, lit a cig and passed out in the chair..........which is normal. So, I'm awaken a...

MomGayle42 · MomGayle42

I have shared with everyone about my sons Tramatic Brain Injury and my inability to know what is enabling and was is not. I am so confused at times and I cannot let it go. I cannot watch TV or do anything it seems but process and re-process decisions I need to make. In an effort to let go I am again posting and...

glad · glad

The reason I have put off working the steps is because I know I will eventually get to the part where I have to admit to someone all my wrongs. My most awful acts have been in reaction to pain or reaction to lack of happiness. Certain times "pop" into my head and I think wow no way can I admit that to...

angel123 · angel123

Smoke before fire To set a fire We gather things to burn Wood kindling We also can burn the past behind us Taking what lit like a fire. within us And learned from it. So we do not get burnt with it again As the fire smoked I knew the light would come Light of a fire to warm the morning chill We all have a flame of li...

ddub · ddub

I use to think being a survivor was a good thing but Suzannah's post on "IF" reminded me there is lots more I learned earlier that I can do rather than just survive. I needed to review this info and will share it with you all tonight too. It renews my hope that I can do more than survive, I can t...

Suzannah · Suzannah

If If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too: If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies, Or being hated don't give way to hating, An...

ddub · ddub

spinning my wheels again which is another revelation - I had used al anon tools to get through a stressful month of June living amongst siblings again, away from my kids and being with my mom during her death. I was unable to attend al anon meetings which was a big mistake because I can see the progress m...

greta · greta

I've spent sometime the last week or so looking at my progress in alanon. It started from a response to a posting I made here...A very wise person responded "don't react". When I read that, I saw that I was fighting not going where I had jumped so many times before...reacting and then think...

Suzannah · Suzannah

...I carry the image of the conveyor belt, thanks Jean, and hold on tight to that "time for me", thanks CJ, and take the many prayers and ((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))) sent my way from this family; and remember my friends words and encouragement of yesterday, Jerry, ddub, Cookie, S...

charlescharles · charlescharles

the "xxx" always hits the fan when you least expect it this morning i get the ranting and raving phone call..the girlfriend and the ex in cahoots and in a war against each other really having nothing to do with me...the death threats from one to the other..it all makes me sick anyway..the &...

charlescharles · charlescharles

a bit confused tonight...the girlfriend asked if i wanted her to spend the night...my answer was simply...if you want to...do i have to pick you up.. she hung up on that i think she wants a full on over the top day in and day out relationship and i am still uncertain...and have been the entire time if this i...

SuSUN · SuSUN

Do any of you have a Significant Other with weak legs, numbness in toes that is non-diabetic related? I have been watching this deterioration take place in my AH and wondered if this could be alcohol-related toxic nerve damage? He also has the muscle wasting with the malnutrition and very large abdo...

angel123 · angel123

Years ago 10/14/92 Day before my Birthday my sponsor gave me a gift, Although she has given me other gifts of this great program too. It was a book Marker, on the store bought side ..( by Hazelden) said Letting Go The world is a better place When we take care of ourselves. This was a time in my life I was raisi...

irish54 · irish54

Wow! I went and looked back at some of my posts from last year ... gives you mixed feelings.... but ALWAYS a reminder than we have no control. The grandaughter I raised as my daughter did graduate May 2007 and it was wonderful!!!! Her birthmother - my oldest daughter - flew out for that. I was happy...

DeadOrAlive · DeadOrAlive

I knew he had been smoking pot but thought (d e n i a l) it was just a joint now and then with friends. Now I found two sandwich baggies nearly both full of pot in his room. My sis says that could be worth as much as $500 each bag!!!! Is that true???? I checked his bank account and there are no withdrawals. N...

Nicole · Nicole

I don't like what I'm seeing right now about myself but I like that it's coming to head. I feel like I am going crazy in the sense that I say I'm not going to do it and all of a sudden I do it. Spying on my husbands every move. I snoop around and look for clues and I'm just waiting or for him to say I'm in love with som...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I have been visualizing placing all the stuff coming up on a conveyor belt that makes its way to HP. It gets over to him for his turn on the line. Really helping me, thought I would share this industrial image with you all. Of course when I think of conveyor belts, I think of Lucille Ball and the candy episod...

maresie · maresie

When I left the A one of my most humbling experiences was to take a gift from an ex boyfriend of mine. I had nothing, no resources and I had asked him for help. Getting help from him invovled tremendous triggers for me. He kept telling me that the felt sorry for me. I felt really put down a lot of the time. N...

angel123 · angel123

Nature at its best The morning sun is peeking thru the trees Time for a new beginning of a new day. The unknown, what lies ahead But to set my frame of mind To know all this will come to pass And enjoy the moments and learn, laugh, smile, and be content being me I made a garden of wildflowers at home and potted a...

Suzannah · Suzannah

This week will be a really heavy week, and although I have found myself pledging it to my HP I still know that humanly it is going to take a lot of ternacity to get through it. I am very low in spirit and I know that my recent encounter on my second fourth step is proving to be very hard going and I have, for this...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Friends, We always spend the 4th of July the same way - a parade in the morning and friends' house at night. They live on a golf course and we "sneak" out there to watch fireworks overhead. Nice mellow company and an awesome view. I was happy to discover that the holiday landed on my weekend wit...

maresie · maresie

I know i'm always whining and complaining so I'll say this. I went on a date this weekend, didn't marry the man. I also didn't obsess, plan, obsess, plan and obsess about what the relationship will become. He didn't follow me home. I didn't sleep with him,. I didn't call him 500 times, he didn't call me 50...

MomGayle42 · MomGayle42

My son started skipping school, disrespecting house rules, bringing strangers into my home and I eventually said enough. He went to stay with his step dad where he had free rein. He went to a party and was assualted. Flown to Harbeview Hospital and had open brain surgery. We did not know if he would liv...

mossrn · mossrn

I am new to this, I realize that I need recovery from a life time of others drinking and drugs. I am for the first time in my 44 years angry at my father and sister who have been verbally and mentally abusive. How do I deal with the anger. I just hit a wall this past year watching my sister sprial out of control a...

irish54 · irish54

Hi everyone! I have been gone from this site for quite a while, as my computer had crashed. Nice to be back. It's enough to say that alcohol and mental illness has affected me all my life ... father was an alcoholic, husband was an A and drug dealer; children involved with alcohol/drugs, son bipolar...

lonewolfmama · lonewolfmama

Hi to everyone out there going through trouble because of the A's we love and pray for. I am so grateful to this site as every time my ABF starts drinking again I can come here and see that there are others out there in my situationwho wish they weren't and are trying so hard to detach. Sometimes I wonder h...

glad · glad

Thanks again for the support of my little family here. After a distant, grumpy sober weekend... This morning a bright, well spoken BF left for his work trip again. He was positive, spoke reasonably about practical issues, sending me money to reimburse our expenses for weekend, and left in a good mo...

Nicole · Nicole

I have been in the program for a little over a year and I'm still having trouble letting go. I don't really understand how you can do it. I have tried reading the literature and for a very long time, I thought I had but every single time I'm around my mother in-law, I completely lose it and I don't know why. ...

joyoma · joyoma

Preface: I am not asking for responses to this post. I just need to get it out of my soul and the only way I can do that is to write. So thanks for reading it...or not. Sorry in advance for giving into depression today. Why is it that weekends and holidays are so hard? I know why for me. I have no one to shar...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingJuly 13, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I am in a bit of a bind. Here is my situation. I am going to visit my sweetheart in a few weeks. After he picks me up I can choose to do two things- go with him to a social event related to his job or I can go see my QiGong master and have a session with her/a class. I am struggling with trying to figure out which one t...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

(((((Family))))) Things have been very rough at home. I have been battling with bitterness towards my AH. I had been getting very angry after working 14 hour days to come home and find my retired AH passed out on the couch and the house in shambles. So tired of having to deal with it all. I had been trying...

laurab · laurab

[spoiler] If the last few days weren't so pathetic and totally crazy, it would be funny. A Son was rescued again by his separated from W. W has a BF with money who she really doesn't want but he pays for lots. W & BF signed a lease on a house so W can breed dogs. She has 2 female...

glad · glad

Weekend, spent time and effort planning very nice bed and breakfast get away. BF was sober but SILENT the whole freaking time. He said most important thing to him was me having a good weekend then acted like a zombie the whole time. NOT one time did he try to engage me in conversation. Sober but distant! P...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	The Past, The Present, The Future --- Living NOW (Preview) NOW is the only moment we have, and that's already gone.	wallsal55	4	438	Jul 11, 2008 by Jean4444
	I am so proud of ME today... Feeling empowered! (Preview) Hi everyone... just an update... My AH has started taking Seroquel for his Bipolar about 7 days now. He promised that he would stop drinking and drugging, and take his meds and stop the partying. He did not come home until 11:30pm lastnite. Please keep in mind, that he is disabled, and doesn't have a j...	jaysbaby	12	774	Jul 11, 2008 by maresie
	Loving Alanon (Preview) I just wanted to share how much I'm loving Alanon. I have been going for about 3 years and just recently started really getting involved and working a "good" program and it feels so good. I'm only on the first step but this time I get it. I'm understanding how it works. I don't get 2-12 yet but I'...	Nicole	5	429	Jul 11, 2008 by maresie
	wanting to change people (thinking I can!), even now... (Preview) Even though I feel like my program is pretty strong I still struggle with wanting certain people to act, behave and 'be" a certain way. I will most likely struggle with this a little all my life. At least now, I can step back and observe this behavior and make changes to correct it. I know that when...	Jean4444	10	493	Jul 11, 2008 by Jean4444
	Q re Appearing impaired while not drinking (Preview) AH is in rehab and says he's not drinking but sometimes when I get home he seems kind of impaired, like his speech is off and very emotional and even a bit stumbly sometimes. He says in rehab they told him that this can happen as the body adjusts to being without alcohol but it triggers me so much because it...	henryg	8	571	Jul 11, 2008 by cedars
	Update (Preview) (((((Family)))), A very good morning to you all on this hot, humid and sticky Wednesday. I thought I would update you on a few things. First of all, hubby is hanging in there. The doctor started him on fluxomine which makes him extremely dizzy. This is normal. He can't do much as it takes alot out of...	Karilynn	4	973	Jul 10, 2008 by Maria123
	Just venting..insecure today (Preview) Basically, this post is just to vent. I have been very insecure these last couple of days. Not sure why...could be because my bf slipped one day last week...could be pms...who really knows. I do ususally get weird around my pms days, so maybe that's what it is??? Anyways, here is my vent: the last...	mslouise	3	415	Jul 10, 2008 by Maria123
	back home (Preview) Dear MIP family, I am back home after my brother's death. It was/is a very sad time for me. I loved my brother very much. We were the two oldest of six and grew up together and no matter where we were we always kept contact and knew that the bond we had as children was strong. My siblings who drink and who a...	carosie	8	357	Jul 10, 2008 by Maria123
	drug of choice (Preview) Ok people, it's me again....I'm not sure if I have a question or just need to be heard. My husband is a recovering A but his new drug of choice is his adult daughter. We had about the millionth discussion about her and him last night. She treats him like cold leftovers, all the while thinking she is a gre...	Minnehaha	14	425	Jul 10, 2008 by Minnehaha
	I had to start today over... (Preview) This morning I got up and started out with an old habit that I wish my brain would unlearn! I started going through my pity pot list. This was how my days started before alanon. It would start with my first waking moment. I would replay my list of gripes, resentments until I had a terrible attitude set...	greta	3	650	Jul 10, 2008 by maresie
	reducing enmeshment (Preview) 6 months ago a friend of mine suggested I get rid of my dogs. He thought it was best I get rid of them because he knew what was better for me than I did. I became incredibly distraught and felt abandoned. 6 months later her emails me and suggests I give him my sisters address in case something happens to me. Ke...	maresie	2	367	Jul 10, 2008 by maresie
	Detachment - Can somebody explain? (Preview) Hi all, This is my first post. My father is an alcoholic. He drank so much that he has possibly given himself irreversible brain damage, in the form of short-term memory loss. He broke his hip last summer and was hospitalized for three months due to: 1. The Hip, 2. The bed sore, 3. And the DT...	Flutterbye	6	610	Jul 10, 2008 by maresie
	Triggers (Preview) As you all know I have significant issues with my roommates to say the least. I really want to make them all dysfunctional and me functional. The truth is that many many times I find it super hard to be civil and not be rude or not be absolutely exasperated. I'e been aware that my closest roomate (in proxi...	maresie	5	363	Jul 10, 2008 by maresie
	more stuff (Preview) tired today..a little bored..a little angry..a little lonely..a little hungry meeting this morning..therapy this afternoon...i think i'll see a movie tonight..or read a book i just feel a bit shot out at the moment one of those hump day wednesdays a guy in the meeting this morning spoke of his life....	charlescharles	2	387	Jul 10, 2008 by lin0606
	I could wring someone's neck!! Off subject (Preview) I could wring someone's neck!!! Knowing, I suppose, that we love cats, some jerk has put a tiny kitten in our fenced back yard. I would guess her to be three to four weeks old. She looks healthy, but does have some fleas. I telephoned our county Humane Association, for whom I used to volunteer. They adver...	Diva	13	773	Jul 10, 2008 by maresie
	Just an update... (Preview) Just thought I'd give ya'll an update on the "situation" with my ex a b/f. As some may remember, after being apart for several months, my ex and I sorta rekindled a friendship. Well to make a long story short, it started to go a little too far. I had my guard up though (thankfully) and knew wh...	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	8	417	Jul 10, 2008 by HEARTBROKEN IN NJ
	will be gone for awhile (Preview) Today was my consult with thoracic surgeon for the lung nodules discovered in my cancer check-up in June. Things are moving way way too fast for me, but have to cope. Am scheduled for surgery on Monday morning. Will be in SCU for 24 hours and then in hospital for several days. This is ten times more up...	joyoma	14	629	Jul 10, 2008 by joyoma
	Acting vs. Reacting (battle with hormones, mouth, & mind) (Preview) Acting....not reacting...THAT is my struggle since last night. He came home an hour and a half late from his meeting. He said he went to Shoney's with some people from the group. I never asked. I didn't REact. I ACTED. I did NOTHING. I said NOTHING. I wasn't being hateful, didn't project an attitude, an...	JenniferN	5	2746	Jul 9, 2008 by cookie1971
	Still Sailing with Capt Morgan (Preview) I've been posting before about my experience with my ex A who has been in my life. I know that I am going through the grieving process and right now I'm in the pissed off stage. Gawd am I pissed off. He sounds so happy in Florida and he's living his life and doing his own thing and I'm still dealing with the...	Gared	5	628	Jul 9, 2008 by serendipity
	NEW BOOK! (Preview) I was in chat this week and a memebr in there had jsut returned from the Internaional confernence and was talking abouta new AlAnon book. I called WSO to get the ordering information. It is called Discovering CHoices The price is $15 and there is $7 shipping (up to abut $87 and then it is 8%. Iordered 6 a...	afglin	6	339	Jul 9, 2008 by Minnehaha
	Question about "Just for Today" (Preview) I have a question on interpretation of parts of the Just for Today "pledge" or however you would define it. The first paragraph talks about not concerning yourself about solving your entire life's problems, but just handling today's situation, handling something that would "ap...	Minnehaha	4	595	Jul 9, 2008 by serendipity
	more stuff (Preview) tired today..a little bored..a little angry..a little lonely..a little hungry meeting this morning..therapy this afternoon...i think i'll see a movie tonight..or read a book i just feel a bit shot out at the moment one of those hump day wednesdays a guy in the meeting this morning spoke of his life....	charlescharles	1	302	Jul 9, 2008 by maresie
	just need to vent (Preview) wokeup this morning with a sort of emotional hangover from the day before when i went to two meetings had conflict with my mate and generally..well..did some step work and talked to my higher power..i think i really just wore myself out yesterday one day at a time..i know..but maybe the spirits were di...	charlescharles	3	508	Jul 9, 2008 by maresie
	porn addiction (Preview) Does anyone know anything about this topic? I'm afraid a loved one of mine is getting into this crap. On their days off, all they do is look at this junk or play games on the *other* computer. I don't know how to approach this person or even what to say. I need help with this.	TK	4	1370	Jul 9, 2008 by canadianguy
	omg! Court Tomorrow (Preview) Tomorrow I have to go to court for the restraining order I filed against my AH, so I could at least have a little peace and quiet and get my stuff moved out of the house. Almost everything is moved, I just have a couple more things there, and as of tomorrow, I plan to stay at the apartment. I have not even stay...	Becky1	6	409	Jul 9, 2008 by Lexie
	the war.. (Preview) ..seems to be on between my ex and my present girlfriend..i am staying out of it..i feel somewhat nuetral all though i guess my allegience...well..my allegience is to me...i feel like they can beat each other down any way they want..i need need need to stay out of it i am basically convinced it has nothi...	charlescharles	10	499	Jul 9, 2008 by maresie
	Happy A because Nasty A and threatened me tonight (Preview) My AH is always a happy drunk until tonight. He really frightened my daughter and me. He goes to play trivia at the bar on Tues nights which is over around 10 pm. He came home at 1 am and from what my daughter said, he sat down, lit a cig and passed out in the chair..........which is normal. So, I'm awaken a...	angel66	4	595	Jul 9, 2008 by maresie
	How do I help him? (Preview) I have shared with everyone about my sons Tramatic Brain Injury and my inability to know what is enabling and was is not. I am so confused at times and I cannot let it go. I cannot watch TV or do anything it seems but process and re-process decisions I need to make. In an effort to let go I am again posting and...	MomGayle42	5	614	Jul 9, 2008 by stariana
	Honesty: putting off the steps (Preview) The reason I have put off working the steps is because I know I will eventually get to the part where I have to admit to someone all my wrongs. My most awful acts have been in reaction to pain or reaction to lack of happiness. Certain times "pop" into my head and I think wow no way can I admit that to...	glad	4	490	Jul 9, 2008 by maresie
	Smoke before Fire (Preview) Smoke before fire To set a fire We gather things to burn Wood kindling We also can burn the past behind us Taking what lit like a fire. within us And learned from it. So we do not get burnt with it again As the fire smoked I knew the light would come Light of a fire to warm the morning chill We all have a flame of li...	angel123	0	289	Jul 9, 2008 by angel123
	thrive, not just survive (Preview) I use to think being a survivor was a good thing but Suzannah's post on "IF" reminded me there is lots more I learned earlier that I can do rather than just survive. I needed to review this info and will share it with you all tonight too. It renews my hope that I can do more than survive, I can t...	ddub	2	786	Jul 9, 2008 by maresie
	IF...Rudyard Kipling.... (Preview) If If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too: If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies, Or being hated don't give way to hating, An...	Suzannah	6	357	Jul 8, 2008 by ddub
	control, controlled, controlling (Preview) spinning my wheels again which is another revelation - I had used al anon tools to get through a stressful month of June living amongst siblings again, away from my kids and being with my mom during her death. I was unable to attend al anon meetings which was a big mistake because I can see the progress m...	ddub	6	341	Jul 8, 2008 by ddub
	My Journey realized from a glance into the past (Preview) I've spent sometime the last week or so looking at my progress in alanon. It started from a response to a posting I made here...A very wise person responded "don't react". When I read that, I saw that I was fighting not going where I had jumped so many times before...reacting and then think...	greta	7	564	Jul 8, 2008 by cookie1971
	IF... (Preview) ...I carry the image of the conveyor belt, thanks Jean, and hold on tight to that "time for me", thanks CJ, and take the many prayers and ((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))) sent my way from this family; and remember my friends words and encouragement of yesterday, Jerry, ddub, Cookie, S...	Suzannah	2	324	Jul 8, 2008 by cookie1971
	blah blah blah morning (Preview) the "xxx" always hits the fan when you least expect it this morning i get the ranting and raving phone call..the girlfriend and the ex in cahoots and in a war against each other really having nothing to do with me...the death threats from one to the other..it all makes me sick anyway..the &...	charlescharles	8	599	Jul 8, 2008 by Maria123
	still not certain what i am doing (Preview) a bit confused tonight...the girlfriend asked if i wanted her to spend the night...my answer was simply...if you want to...do i have to pick you up.. she hung up on that i think she wants a full on over the top day in and day out relationship and i am still uncertain...and have been the entire time if this i...	charlescharles	10	517	Jul 8, 2008 by Maria123
	Leg Weakness, Symptoms of Alcoholism...? (Preview) Do any of you have a Significant Other with weak legs, numbness in toes that is non-diabetic related? I have been watching this deterioration take place in my AH and wondered if this could be alcohol-related toxic nerve damage? He also has the muscle wasting with the malnutrition and very large abdo...	SuSUN	7	10710	Jul 8, 2008 by round3
	Letting Go (Preview) Years ago 10/14/92 Day before my Birthday my sponsor gave me a gift, Although she has given me other gifts of this great program too. It was a book Marker, on the store bought side ..( by Hazelden) said Letting Go The world is a better place When we take care of ourselves. This was a time in my life I was raisi...	angel123	5	321	Jul 8, 2008 by AlissaRM
	Updates since my comp was down (Preview) Wow! I went and looked back at some of my posts from last year ... gives you mixed feelings.... but ALWAYS a reminder than we have no control. The grandaughter I raised as my daughter did graduate May 2007 and it was wonderful!!!! Her birthmother - my oldest daughter - flew out for that. I was happy...	irish54	4	500	Jul 8, 2008 by irish54
	found pot in teen's room have a question (Preview) I knew he had been smoking pot but thought (d e n i a l) it was just a joint now and then with friends. Now I found two sandwich baggies nearly both full of pot in his room. My sis says that could be worth as much as $500 each bag!!!! Is that true???? I checked his bank account and there are no withdrawals. N...	DeadOrAlive	10	743	Jul 8, 2008 by Mobirdie
	I think I may be coming out of denial about myself (Preview) I don't like what I'm seeing right now about myself but I like that it's coming to head. I feel like I am going crazy in the sense that I say I'm not going to do it and all of a sudden I do it. Spying on my husbands every move. I snoop around and look for clues and I'm just waiting or for him to say I'm in love with som...	Nicole	8	606	Jul 8, 2008 by maresie
	The Factory (conveyor belt) (Preview) I have been visualizing placing all the stuff coming up on a conveyor belt that makes its way to HP. It gets over to him for his turn on the line. Really helping me, thought I would share this industrial image with you all. Of course when I think of conveyor belts, I think of Lucille Ball and the candy episod...	Jean4444	5	657	Jul 8, 2008 by round3
	looking at triggers rather than being them (Preview) When I left the A one of my most humbling experiences was to take a gift from an ex boyfriend of mine. I had nothing, no resources and I had asked him for help. Getting help from him invovled tremendous triggers for me. He kept telling me that the felt sorry for me. I felt really put down a lot of the time. N...	maresie	1	344	Jul 8, 2008 by maire rua
	"Nature at it's Best" (Preview) Nature at its best The morning sun is peeking thru the trees Time for a new beginning of a new day. The unknown, what lies ahead But to set my frame of mind To know all this will come to pass And enjoy the moments and learn, laugh, smile, and be content being me I made a garden of wildflowers at home and potted a...	angel123	4	412	Jul 8, 2008 by Suzannah
	No physical support... (Preview) This week will be a really heavy week, and although I have found myself pledging it to my HP I still know that humanly it is going to take a lot of ternacity to get through it. I am very low in spirit and I know that my recent encounter on my second fourth step is proving to be very hard going and I have, for this...	Suzannah	10	503	Jul 8, 2008 by Suzannah
	I think I learned something! (Preview) Friends, We always spend the 4th of July the same way - a parade in the morning and friends' house at night. They live on a golf course and we "sneak" out there to watch fireworks overhead. Nice mellow company and an awesome view. I was happy to discover that the holiday landed on my weekend wit...	Loupiness	6	616	Jul 8, 2008 by ddub
	on a positive note (Preview) I know i'm always whining and complaining so I'll say this. I went on a date this weekend, didn't marry the man. I also didn't obsess, plan, obsess, plan and obsess about what the relationship will become. He didn't follow me home. I didn't sleep with him,. I didn't call him 500 times, he didn't call me 50...	maresie	7	472	Jul 7, 2008 by cookie1971
	Mothers worst nightmare (Preview) My son started skipping school, disrespecting house rules, bringing strangers into my home and I eventually said enough. He went to stay with his step dad where he had free rein. He went to a party and was assualted. Flown to Harbeview Hospital and had open brain surgery. We did not know if he would liv...	MomGayle42	18	875	Jul 7, 2008 by MomGayle42
	new to al-anon (Preview) I am new to this, I realize that I need recovery from a life time of others drinking and drugs. I am for the first time in my 44 years angry at my father and sister who have been verbally and mentally abusive. How do I deal with the anger. I just hit a wall this past year watching my sister sprial out of control a...	mossrn	7	608	Jul 7, 2008 by cookie1971
	Some things don't change (Preview) Hi everyone! I have been gone from this site for quite a while, as my computer had crashed. Nice to be back. It's enough to say that alcohol and mental illness has affected me all my life ... father was an alcoholic, husband was an A and drug dealer; children involved with alcohol/drugs, son bipolar...	irish54	9	642	Jul 7, 2008 by cookie1971
	Six Months Pregnant/ABF Drinking Again (Preview) Hi to everyone out there going through trouble because of the A's we love and pray for. I am so grateful to this site as every time my ABF starts drinking again I can come here and see that there are others out there in my situationwho wish they weren't and are trying so hard to detach. Sometimes I wonder h...	lonewolfmama	7	728	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Thankful for brief moment this am and for you guys! (Preview) Thanks again for the support of my little family here. After a distant, grumpy sober weekend... This morning a bright, well spoken BF left for his work trip again. He was positive, spoke reasonably about practical issues, sending me money to reimburse our expenses for weekend, and left in a good mo...	glad	2	469	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Don't know how to let go (Preview) I have been in the program for a little over a year and I'm still having trouble letting go. I don't really understand how you can do it. I have tried reading the literature and for a very long time, I thought I had but every single time I'm around my mother in-law, I completely lose it and I don't know why. ...	Nicole	12	815	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	major pity party today (Preview) Preface: I am not asking for responses to this post. I just need to get it out of my soul and the only way I can do that is to write. So thanks for reading it...or not. Sorry in advance for giving into depression today. Why is it that weekends and holidays are so hard? I know why for me. I have no one to shar...	joyoma	6	592	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	July Business Meeting-----07/13/08 (Preview) Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingJuly 13, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...	Mandy123	0	329	Jul 7, 2008 by Mandy123
	Sometimes its HARD to know what I want, exactly...do you know what I mean? (Preview) I am in a bit of a bind. Here is my situation. I am going to visit my sweetheart in a few weeks. After he picks me up I can choose to do two things- go with him to a social event related to his job or I can go see my QiGong master and have a session with her/a class. I am struggling with trying to figure out which one t...	Jean4444	14	738	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	REMEMBERING HE IS SICK (Preview) (((((Family))))) Things have been very rough at home. I have been battling with bitterness towards my AH. I had been getting very angry after working 14 hour days to come home and find my retired AH passed out on the couch and the house in shambles. So tired of having to deal with it all. I had been trying...	cookie1971	11	676	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Such Craziness- You couldn't make this one up (Preview) [spoiler] If the last few days weren't so pathetic and totally crazy, it would be funny. A Son was rescued again by his separated from W. W has a BF with money who she really doesn't want but he pays for lots. W & BF signed a lease on a house so W can breed dogs. She has 2 female...	laurab	6	701	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Just freaking ranting and raving! (Preview) Weekend, spent time and effort planning very nice bed and breakfast get away. BF was sober but SILENT the whole freaking time. He said most important thing to him was me having a good weekend then acted like a zombie the whole time. NOT one time did he try to engage me in conversation. Sober but distant! P...	glad	6	634	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.