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I knew he had been smoking pot but thought (d e n i a l) it was just a joint now and then with friends. Now I found two sandwich baggies nearly both full of pot in his room. My sis says that could be worth as much as $500 each bag!!!! Is that true???? I checked his bank account and there are no withdrawals. Not sure why it is important to me but I want to know what that is worth. and thank you. I went to a f2f parents meeting last night. It helped quell the panic but obsession is still in full bloom, evidently. thanks
OK, so this is based on past experience that I have gained from living for almost 11 years with a man who smoked marijuana almost daily.
1) It depends on the quality of the marijuana that he has. The better quality the more money it costs. Smell (lol the more it stank the better quality I knew it was) the color of the tips of the leaves, the stickiness of it.
2) Your area that you live is plays a part of the cost as well. For example Idaho (where we lived) versus Washington (where we are now) changed how much he was spending on it.
3) I can tell you that one sandwhich bag with just the very bottom lined up with 3 to 5 buds would be about $20 in my area.
So potentially it could be about $500, maybe even more depending on quality and demand in your area.
Please try and take care of you, do something for yourself and work on you. You can only control you.
Yours in recovery, Mandy
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"We are not punished for our unforgiveness, we are punished by it" Jim Stovall
I am trying. I am keeping busy with a household project. I hardly slept last night. I am going to tire myself out for tonight. I just can't imagine where he got the money tho I guess he went in on it with friends, but why is it here? He went out tonight and left it here. Probably just rolled a joint , I guess.
I am in nyc. It smells strong. I see buds.
Well I am making my fav comfort food now, but not too much, LOL. peace DOA
The actual value would require knowing the weight as already posted but I can tell you this as I work for juvenile courts... Its more then 40 oz so it would be a criminal felony charge. This is much more important then the value as a Drug Felony can have a drastic impact on someone's future... No student grants or loans, jobs etc. He could also be charghed with "intent to sale" at that amount, which would be a first strick in the 3 stricks your out laws....
DOA...I find myself just responding to the compulsion subject with, "What will you do with the answer to the question or information?" That was what an early sponsor use to help me with...questions that helped me look at me that led me to my own recovery. Yep she smoked mj and yep I even had gone shopping for it for her. We both participated and that might not be exactly what you are doing however ever I use to ask lots of questions that didn't have anything to do with my own recovery and just delayed it and fed my denial and justification system. The answer doesn't matter if its not what you want going on around you. He has other thoughts and choices obviously.
Hon this is surely NOT for personal use, he has it to sell it, then He keeps so much money and gives the dealer the rest.
For all you know he has cash stashed somewhere and he has bought it from the dealer and now he sells it for more to buy his own stash. Drug dealers big or small, do not bank their money. That is why busts alway find guns and lots of cash.
It matters to know, becuz if you guys got busted, EVERYONE in your home would be cuffed and taken away. If you have little kids they would ask you to call family to get them,if not they take them and place them in a temporary foster home.
how old is your son? I would send him off backpacking in a theraputic back packing counseling trip, to look at his life.
Thanks, friends. He is 16. I do not use , never into pot at all but yes 25 yrs ago did drink, take pills, and stuff. I don't smoke anything or drink A.
I had myself convinced he only had a joint now and then. I am in shock at the amount I see, like I said. His dad is a long time AH in and out of sobriety nearly died last June and that is why I started posting here a while ago. I did not tell AH what I found. I do not trust his reactions nor mine TO his then the focus will be off our son.
I am thinking I must take the pot and then it will be huge thing that I invaded his privacy. Well.
I already have plans for him to go to my parents out of the city on Wed. for 10 days. My parents know nothing of MY history with substance as I hid it well and always was employed and functioning. They know of my AH as his problems were more "public". They are old. It would kill them to know of my son and this.
I am sick to imagine well I guess I should not let my mind go there. prayers please if you do that. DOA, peace
What a icky situation for you. I always try to reflect how my parents would have handled a situation. They are fair honest people but we had drawn in cement boundaries as kids. You mentioned you were concerned about invading his privacy. My Dad pretty much let me know that if I was suspect of anything illegal while living at home I had no right to privacy and I owned nothing. I've taken on the same reasoning with my son. If I thought he had anything in his room, booze, pills, pot I'd go through everything "I" paid for to find it in "my" house. To me, kids aren't like adults in that we don't dump their booze or take away illegal substances. Especially if he has the audacity to bring it in to my home and jeopardize everything we've worked for. I could give a rats a** if my son felt invaded (I have an 18 yr. old). I'm not here to be his friend. I'm here to do my best at teaching guidance, morals. I'm real sure I would take it without saying a word to him just to make him squirm and panic a bit. What kid wants to ask their parents "Where'd my bags of pot go?"
My Dad found some apple wine under my bed once that was supposed to go to a party with me. Just my luck he decided to Hoover the house. OMG! The terror I felt when I realized it was gone. I sure didn't ask where it went! That night I went to leave for the party and my car keys were gone from where they hung. They were gone for the next 30 days. I had bought and pd for the car myself. Didn't matter. I screwed up, I knew it and that was my punishment. Dads house, Dads rules. No questions asked.
Christy
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If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
I had a similar situation with my 15 y.o. son, although the substance was unknown to me, I knew it wasn't good. After much freaking out on my own, I decided to talk to my son about what I had found. I shared my concern about drug use and risk of addiction given his father's alcoholism. I let him know that I would not let drugs take hold of him and, out of love, I would take him to a hospital and/or treatment center if I found such substances or suspected drug use. I then cried my eyes out. He was devastated that I was so worried and upset and promised never to "experiment" again. I hope he never does, but I know that the battle against drugs for teens is never ending. All I can do is set limits and follow through. Not sure if this helps, but wanted to share my experience.
My first thought was..i hope you took the bag and destroyed it. I woudl not are if it was $500 worth. You have a right to set a boundary of no ilegal drugs in yoru home. Period.
If you put it back,...he will probably sell it, get caughte, and then you maylose your house, car, etc. IF you ahve small children int eh home , they can be takes by child protective srvices.
The first thing that came to my mind was WHY care about how much it is worth, there are more important issues here to deal with. I would say that he is not only useing but he is also dealing now to support his addiction. That puts everything on a different level. Because he keeps the stash in your home you are in a difficult situation. If and when, and it will happen sooner or later, the authorities find out that he is dealing your home will be raided. When that happens you will go to jail because by allowing it in your home in the eye of the legal system you and everyone else in the home is as guilty as he is. So now it isn't so much about whether or not he is using it is about family safety. He is dealing with some nasty people and the sooner you put a stop to it the better.
A friend of mine was in the same situation as you and she called the police and reported it herself, turned her child in and put a stop to all of it.
My son robbed my home looking for things to sell for drugs. I not only called the police but I filed charges and I stuck to them. Someone asked me "What would you do if it was a total stranger" the answer was obvious so I knew what I had to do. After all was said and done he did thank me for making him responsible for his own actions.
So go do the next right thing. You will be glad that you did. Even if he spends time in jail at least you will know where he is at and that he has food and lodging. Much better than spending his time under a bridge somewhere which by the way never hurt an addict or an alcoholic.
Good luck
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Everything I have ever let go of has claw marks all over it.
