Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I have noticed that since I finished my first round through the steps I am struggling to keep the program and HP the center of my life where I know both should be. Don't get me wrong I am still very much working the program but when I was working the steps more concentrated though the first round of the st...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I'm going to try to sum up a really complicated situation. My boyfriend who is the greatest man I have ever had in my life has been informed by his HP that he must choose between me (who he loves as much as I love him) and his purpose in life (ie god's will for him or path for him). I posted a while back about ho...

canadianguy · canadianguy

I was reminded the other day (and likely every day), of how much the perspectives that WE bring to every situation affect us, and our ability to manage / accept situations, people, etc.... It reminded me of a great story from John Gray - author of the Mars & Venus books.... One of his self-help tape...

Diva · Diva

I have taken a little hiatus from MIP, but am now ready to rejoin you with renewed vigor. I will be catching up on all of you who I love so dearly, and getting to know the new members as well. I send best of good wishes to everyone. Diva

gimmpy · gimmpy

My 21 year old is in deep with drugs it appears. She hit a deer with her car, again. She received a $1600 check from insurance. She took the check, did not get the car repaired and has disapeared. She is not answering our calls or text messages. Now work called and says she hasn't shown up there. chances are...

glad lee · glad lee

I had a tense moment with a friend tonight. She is having another party next weekend. As we were talking tonight, I asked what I could bring. She rattled off what she and another person are bringing, so I offered a salad. She said that would be "perfect" and then proceeded to tell me the gue...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

AS most of you know that read my post yesterday, my son's 12th birthday, I started out not focused and trying to get there. After posting here I felt better, after praying on things I felt better, blessed and grateful. We were ready to start a beautiful birthday celebrating day. Got to the skating rin...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), I hope you have all had a good weekend. To those of you that are in the path of the northeast snowstorm, stay safe. Please feel free to send some of it my way. I'm just slightly too far west of it to get any - maybe a flurry or two. You all know how much I love the snow. Anyway, my niece and I wer...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I cannot do anything about my mom, my husband or anyone unless I first focus on me. I tend to get into their business too much. I am so grateful for their prescence in my life. Today I am sitting in the library trying to get my head together & do what is in front of me. This perticular day is a Monday &...

Jozie · Jozie

Well... It has been an Up & Down kind of weekend...Never boring that is for sure...Friday I had read in my devotional books that I should conquer my fears...Well I couldn't think of any...lol... Well 100% of the time since I started F2F meeting it has been my Sister in law... (Which I love that we sha...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I am hating my job and I cannot seem to stop. I need to stop hating my job. I need to keep my job even though everything (sick) in me is screaming for me to quit. I just took a week off to deal with my storage unit leftover from my marriage which was a pretty horrible week, generally. Big bad reminders of tha...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Well today is my son's birthday and I was bound and determined last night that I would not project and worry my way through it....but here I am so I must need some ESH. I'm having quit the time staying focused.....but am diggin in with both feet and trying. To update a bit, my EXABF sent me an email and aske...

Loupiness · Loupiness

It was chaos at my house tonight. Don't even know what happened. My 4 yr old ended up hysterical because he didn't feel like he was being treated fairly in a video game with my daughter and the neighbors boys, my 15 yr old tried to fix it and became angry when he couldn't, and my daughter stirred the pot. As f...

Cyn · Cyn

Yesterday was a bit rough to say the least. I turned my phone off for the last week, when I turned it on Thursday, there were 4 VM and 2 texts from my A. All very sweet, each VM a bit more urgent. So I called him back yesterday morning. He was overly sweet, excited to talk to me, couldnt really chat because...

maresie · maresie

Last night I went to see Johnny Cash at Folsom prison which is an independent movie. As some of you may know Johnny and June Carter Cash gave a concert at Folsom prison. During that time Johnny met an accomplished musician, Glen Shirley and eventually championed him and when he was released from priso...

Maria123 · Maria123

The Man Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear " the rules " From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered &...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), Recovery is all about taking care of ourselves. It's getting emotionally and physically healthy. It's about living strong. Every October I remind you to get those mamograms. A friend of mine who works for a nonprofit group sent me an email. She has thoroughly checked this site...

beachmum · beachmum

Hi all, I'm new to the board. I hope to get some help here, since I don't know where else to turn. my boyfriend of 3 years is a food addict. When I first started dating him, I had known him for years; he had ballooned in weight to what he said was 450lbs, and he had blamed his past really awful marriage for his o...

Tracy · Tracy

I am very confused my inner voice/gods will comes to me when I meditate and through other alanoners, literature etc. All this guidance tells me I need to love me, that its not my responsibility to control, rescue others. That I am powerless over the A and I need to make healthy choices for myself.. I k...

Lucie · Lucie

Hi There I am in a complicated situation. Based on some actions I took before I joined Al-Anon and learned I was powerless. I am since trying my best to let go. Heres what went on. My husband has an alcohol problem that he is working on. But until he started working on it, things were bad. Every other month h...

Tracy · Tracy

Wow just recieved guidance from HP thanks to another al anon memeber. I try to fix everything make everything o.k. This means I control (try) people take on their responsibilities try and run their lives. I do this for two reasons because I care for them but also to create the life I desire. But I have...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

My son came home yesterday completely devastated. He had left his IPOD on the school bus and just knew he would never see it again. It hurt him even more because he had worked making clay pens and snakes and selling them, and saved every penny to buy it with, and $250 is ALOT of money for a child to make on h...

gngcrzy · gngcrzy

On Wednesday I split off altogether from my crazy friend. I feel like an a**hole for doing it but I was losing my mind. I spent yesterday and the day before depressed and numb. It's hard to get out of bed. My phone doesn't work. My wallet disappeared. I feel like my sponsor's pretty well sick of me and g...

Tracy · Tracy

every time I submit a new post one of those little black ticks is at the side saying no posts. How do I get rid of this so people asnwer my posts? -- Edited by Tracy at 10:41, 2009-02-28 -- Edited by Tracy at 10:42, 2009-02-28

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

It has been a hard week, my AS has been on a binge this week came in and made got me so very upset, I tried to be calm and matter of fact, but after he left I was a wreck. I gave him food and some snacks to take with him, I am not at the place yet where I can completely put him out of my life. I look at him and I see what he...

nmike · nmike

I requested an internal transfer. I interviewed. I received a letter offering me the job. I think it would be a good move to learn a new subject area. Learn new skills. Something to put on my resume. Same pay. I would get away from an antagonistic co-worker. Well, it would put me in the same dept. as my AHso...

maresie · maresie

At the moment I am working very consciously to shed the victim role which I am very famiiar with. Besides an attitude change for me it means lots of letting go. When I give someone something I have to let go of how they use it. When I am misunderstood often I have to let go that people don't understand me....

Cyn · Cyn

This is what I dont understand. It seems to be the same story from everyone. The A drinks too much, crosses serious lines in relationships, then moves out and runs away from everything leaving destruction behind. Why is it the same story? What is it about this disease that makes them so selfish and...

Jozie · Jozie

Well this morning I was slow moving... Couldn't be my Mo Jo together to get up and get my feet in "Go" mode... Well after hitting the snooze button several times, my handsome son comes up the steps with the look of "Mom Is Still In Bed?" So I carried my lazy butt down the steps and hit t...

Rora · Rora

I have been working and reworking step 2 and 3 for a while now. Today, during a deliberate consultation with my HP I started thinking about how capable I have been in having an imaginary relationship with my aH and how easy it was (is) for me to create something that isn't. It can be good. It can be bad. I hav...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family)))), Am I cracking up (Christy don't answer that! ) or does it appear to others that the lists of posts and their fonts have gotten smaller? I have increased the text size, but it still seems to me like the heading above the lists of post has remained the same, but the topic list has shrunk. ...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

So, I was driving home last week, thinking and thinking and thinking about the path my AH is taking. His father told me he wouldn't be surprised if the A lost everything AGAIN and had to go back to their place. So I was unconsciusly working out a plan of what WE would do when HE lost everything LOL, and aski...

angel mom · angel mom

My husband passed from alcoholic poisoning and I'm having a difficult time. Some of his family blames me for his death. I tried to get him help more than once. I took him to detox but it didn't stick. So i gave him and ultimatum to chose his family and get help or his addiction. a few days later he got check in...

Christy · Christy

Our dear Maria is always the one to post everyone's Birthday. (Even just after having surgery.) Thanks Maria, I think it's so thoughtful of you to remember and take the time. Here's what bothers me...you can see how many people took the time to view the "happy birthday" post. How hard is i...

brightmommy · brightmommy

Today's passage from Hope for Today describes how I have forgiven in the past...accepting unacceptable behaviors...I was more less trying to forget it than to forgive. That is why I sunk deep into the past events and relive them over and over in my mind. I have not truly worked through the resentments...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

"Please free my thinking of self will, self seeking, dishonesty and wrong motives". That is a part of a prayer I pray every morning, usually before my feet hit the floor. Yesterday was no different, of course with some limited contact from the EXABF on Tuesday, again my world was feeling a...

tabi1 · tabi1

see my last thread to understand this. i haven't the strength to repeat it. he made contact and we spoke to each other with respect and then... i lost it. last thursday night i told him on email how i felt, how lost i was. his reply was to tell me that this was all about 'him getting better'. he instigated no c...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

I'm happy!1 I'm living alone with my daughter and feeling good. Things with my Ah are fine, I joke with him that I see him more, now that we are not living together. Also, I successfully stated rules NO drinking in my place, and No coming by drunk. And yesterday he called me drunk and I had the ability to tel...

maresie · maresie

Well as you know one person who I had hoped was going to be a friend of mine let me down after promising to meet me sometime last week. This morning was the first time I've seen her since the "stood up". I discussed this issue in therapy so I was well aware this is something I'm pretty awkward at. ...

Lilly Burn · Lilly Burn

Hello, I had some lovely responses to my situation when my AH announced from thousands of miles away, that he no longer loved me as a husband should love a wife, that people needed him more than he needed them, that he was like his father (always absent from his life) and that his alcohol problem wasnt goi...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Well yesterday I feel like I passed a test finally:) EXABF sent me a comment to my blog about MY 12 step program.....said I was "absolutely glowing" (so he must have been checking out my picts also) and welcomed me to the world of recovery so to speak. The old me would have had to comment back...

desperate for help · desperate for help

Hello! I have been reading alot about alcohol poisioning. My AH drinks every night to the point of passing out every single time he drinks. In reading the information he as showed several symptoms of poisoning like being unconscious, his body sometimes shakes terribly, sometimes he will stop bre...

inhisarms · inhisarms

Hi Everyone! I am so excited to have found this board. My fiance is currently in treatment for drug/alcohol addiction. So far things are going well and he seems positive (has been in treatment before). I guess i am worried about life when he comes back. I hear so many horror stories about early rec...

Canary · Canary

My AH is in the hospital for his drinking. FInally after 3+ days worth, he is in detoxing. I went to see the alcohol counselor yesterday that I had set up for us. We were supposed to go together. He suggested that I go and see him last night. I did. Should I go again today???? I am in turmoil. As much as I know...

Cyn · Cyn

I am not a chaser - I am someone who runs. Every single time a relationship hits a rocky spot and the man in my life walks away from me, I change my number, and keep my distance. I cant fix my A - he is broken. He turns to alcohol to have a good time with friends, having to party it up and prove how cool he is. And...

Ness · Ness

A few of you have suggested that husb may like to come to meetings with me. He is always interested in hearing what I learn from f2f and from posting here. I feel however that if he were there at meetings with me my ability to share would be comprimised.....although I know we can participate in th...

superdebby · superdebby

There is a lot of info on this site and my situation is probably already been advised upon. If someone could send me a link to the appropriate topics, I would be grateful. Brother is 35. Was a functioning alcoholic until a year ago. Quit his job and hasn't done anything since. Went through his saving...

maresie · maresie

http://www.oprah.com/slideshow/oathome/slideshow4_ss_tours0206/1

mslouise · mslouise

Hello all. I haven't posted in a while, but look on frequently. I've been doing well. Haven't had contact with my ex bf for five months now. (He left and I don't know where he is - I believe he is staying with his "friends".) I am still going to my meetings, use my slogans regularly and am t...

Cyn · Cyn

I just read someone's post about how hurt people hurt people, and in the end they really are hurting themselves. It made me think about alot. I spent 3 years with a man who fought me every step of the way to starting a life together. Every single stage we went through: moving in with me, getting over hom...

brightmommy · brightmommy

Hope For Today page 50 Thought for the Day says...It takes courage to change. now that i have a Higher Power and program friends to help me, i know there are no limits to my recovery in Al-Anon... Today I am taking the courage to change my behaviors so that I can be a healthier person. I can trust in my HP an...

Cyn · Cyn

3 1/2 years ago I walked away from a man who I was so disgustingly in love with because he was addicted to pills. Now, I feel like I am doing the same thing with someone else I loved, planned to marry, etc. because he is drinking to the point he is becoming violent with me. Two weeks ago was not the first time...

chris52 · chris52

Hello again wonderful Alanoners, It's been a long time since I posted but I just wanted to check in and also let some of my dear Alanoners know that I still care. I don't get to go online very often these days,but when I can I do try to look in. I am doing great..........but it occurred to me the other day that...

Ness · Ness

The events of the last 10 days re my Ason have been testing to say the least. He called us for help (which we took seriously, as he's extremely stubborn and protective of his disease and never asks for help) and we (husb & I) have been in discussions with the people in his assisted housing as to...

Lanchas · Lanchas

I was talking to a friend of mine about how clueless our parents can be about the internet - IMing, chat rooms, message boards.....etc.... how can u explain how to use those things? IM I can explain but how do u explain how to use a chat room or a message board or explain how it works? Lanchas

kam1974 · kam1974

Hello all! I am hoping if I post the goings on of my day today that there maight be others out there that have ESH that might relate. I am truly at a loss of what to do. I plan to call my f2f sponsor in the morning about this issue as well, but I figure the more esh the better!! My AH told me today that he stole, li...

Maria123 · Maria123

Maria gets her best singing voice tuned (oh wait, better not ) Happy Birthday to you Dear Jonibaloni. I hope your day was the best! love ya, YourMaria

ally · ally

(Guys) Not be on in like agessssssss......This was a poem i wrote this morning and decided to share it with you all. I know you will understand it only two well. Hope your all doing well, and shall catch up soon.....Take care.. WHY:: Why do i laugh, Why do i cry, Why do folks leave me, and not say goodbye...

gngcrzy · gngcrzy

I broke things off with my qualifier over Christmas. Last Sunday he made a date for this Sunday (yesterday) to sort of reconnect and see how things stand. Okay- I'll give it a shot. (Cue 7 days of angsting over it- should I cancel? How am I going to stay serene and not punch him in the nose?) Turned out I did...

Maria123 · Maria123

Hurt people hurt people. I got it, or so I thought. I learned that all those invitations for fights that I chose to go to only led me to hurt people. If someone lashed out at me, my instinctive reaction was to lambaste them right back and harder if I could. Now I know. I got that part through many, many 24 ho...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Trouble keeping program and HP center stage. (Preview) I have noticed that since I finished my first round through the steps I am struggling to keep the program and HP the center of my life where I know both should be. Don't get me wrong I am still very much working the program but when I was working the steps more concentrated though the first round of the st...	shellyj123	6	720	Mar 3, 2009 by Jean4444
	Scared to death! (Preview) I'm going to try to sum up a really complicated situation. My boyfriend who is the greatest man I have ever had in my life has been informed by his HP that he must choose between me (who he loves as much as I love him) and his purpose in life (ie god's will for him or path for him). I posted a while back about ho...	carolinagirl	8	566	Mar 3, 2009 by Jean4444
	Perspectives.... (Preview) I was reminded the other day (and likely every day), of how much the perspectives that WE bring to every situation affect us, and our ability to manage / accept situations, people, etc.... It reminded me of a great story from John Gray - author of the Mars & Venus books.... One of his self-help tape...	canadianguy	8	628	Mar 3, 2009 by Suzannah
	Just when you thought you were safe....... (Preview) I have taken a little hiatus from MIP, but am now ready to rejoin you with renewed vigor. I will be catching up on all of you who I love so dearly, and getting to know the new members as well. I send best of good wishes to everyone. Diva	Diva	20	784	Mar 3, 2009 by Suzannah
	having a nervous breakdown (Preview) My 21 year old is in deep with drugs it appears. She hit a deer with her car, again. She received a $1600 check from insurance. She took the check, did not get the car repaired and has disapeared. She is not answering our calls or text messages. Now work called and says she hasn't shown up there. chances are...	gimmpy	5	833	Mar 3, 2009 by gimmpy
	Avoiding resentment (Preview) I had a tense moment with a friend tonight. She is having another party next weekend. As we were talking tonight, I asked what I could bring. She rattled off what she and another person are bringing, so I offered a salad. She said that would be "perfect" and then proceeded to tell me the gue...	glad lee	7	550	Mar 3, 2009 by Winddancer30
	What an UNBELIVABLE day~a parent's worst nightmare (Preview) AS most of you know that read my post yesterday, my son's 12th birthday, I started out not focused and trying to get there. After posting here I felt better, after praying on things I felt better, blessed and grateful. We were ready to start a beautiful birthday celebrating day. Got to the skating rin...	shellyj123	10	552	Mar 3, 2009 by Christy
	Cat and dog anaology.... (Preview) (((Family))), I hope you have all had a good weekend. To those of you that are in the path of the northeast snowstorm, stay safe. Please feel free to send some of it my way. I'm just slightly too far west of it to get any - maybe a flurry or two. You all know how much I love the snow. Anyway, my niece and I wer...	Karilynn	7	571	Mar 3, 2009 by Christy
	getting back to focusing on me. (Preview) I cannot do anything about my mom, my husband or anyone unless I first focus on me. I tend to get into their business too much. I am so grateful for their prescence in my life. Today I am sitting in the library trying to get my head together & do what is in front of me. This perticular day is a Monday &...	Hoot Nanny	3	537	Mar 2, 2009 by Jerry F
	What a ROller Coaster of a weekend!!!! (Preview) Well... It has been an Up & Down kind of weekend...Never boring that is for sure...Friday I had read in my devotional books that I should conquer my fears...Well I couldn't think of any...lol... Well 100% of the time since I started F2F meeting it has been my Sister in law... (Which I love that we sha...	Jozie	1	615	Mar 2, 2009 by maresie
	This is the place to bring the messes...(as I perceive them to be) (Preview) I am hating my job and I cannot seem to stop. I need to stop hating my job. I need to keep my job even though everything (sick) in me is screaming for me to quit. I just took a week off to deal with my storage unit leftover from my marriage which was a pretty horrible week, generally. Big bad reminders of tha...	Jean4444	8	551	Mar 2, 2009 by gngcrzy
	Struggling to stay in the now~In need of some ESH (Preview) Well today is my son's birthday and I was bound and determined last night that I would not project and worry my way through it....but here I am so I must need some ESH. I'm having quit the time staying focused.....but am diggin in with both feet and trying. To update a bit, my EXABF sent me an email and aske...	shellyj123	8	542	Mar 2, 2009 by Hoot Nanny
	you are my substitute (Preview) It was chaos at my house tonight. Don't even know what happened. My 4 yr old ended up hysterical because he didn't feel like he was being treated fairly in a video game with my daughter and the neighbors boys, my 15 yr old tried to fix it and became angry when he couldn't, and my daughter stirred the pot. As f...	Loupiness	6	509	Mar 2, 2009 by carolinagirl
	Remaining neutral and keeping strong for me (Preview) Yesterday was a bit rough to say the least. I turned my phone off for the last week, when I turned it on Thursday, there were 4 VM and 2 texts from my A. All very sweet, each VM a bit more urgent. So I called him back yesterday morning. He was overly sweet, excited to talk to me, couldnt really chat because...	Cyn	7	448	Mar 2, 2009 by shellyj123
	Johnny Cash at Folsom Prison (Preview) Last night I went to see Johnny Cash at Folsom prison which is an independent movie. As some of you may know Johnny and June Carter Cash gave a concert at Folsom prison. During that time Johnny met an accomplished musician, Glen Shirley and eventually championed him and when he was released from priso...	maresie	4	619	Mar 2, 2009 by Jean4444
	The Mens Rules which can also be some of Alanon's Tools (Preview) The Man Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear " the rules " From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered &...	Maria123	11	696	Mar 2, 2009 by barisax
	Breast Cancer - Helping Others (Preview) ((((Family)))), Recovery is all about taking care of ourselves. It's getting emotionally and physically healthy. It's about living strong. Every October I remind you to get those mamograms. A friend of mine who works for a nonprofit group sent me an email. She has thoroughly checked this site...	Karilynn	2	386	Mar 1, 2009 by belle1
	food addiction food addiction overeating (Preview) Hi all, I'm new to the board. I hope to get some help here, since I don't know where else to turn. my boyfriend of 3 years is a food addict. When I first started dating him, I had known him for years; he had ballooned in weight to what he said was 450lbs, and he had blamed his past really awful marriage for his o...	beachmum	3	1317	Mar 1, 2009 by Goodgran
	Spirit/mind (Preview) I am very confused my inner voice/gods will comes to me when I meditate and through other alanoners, literature etc. All this guidance tells me I need to love me, that its not my responsibility to control, rescue others. That I am powerless over the A and I need to make healthy choices for myself.. I k...	Tracy	3	462	Feb 28, 2009 by serendipity
	I am new to this board... (Preview) Hi There I am in a complicated situation. Based on some actions I took before I joined Al-Anon and learned I was powerless. I am since trying my best to let go. Heres what went on. My husband has an alcohol problem that he is working on. But until he started working on it, things were bad. Every other month h...	Lucie	6	447	Feb 28, 2009 by Karilynn
	responsibility (Preview) Wow just recieved guidance from HP thanks to another al anon memeber. I try to fix everything make everything o.k. This means I control (try) people take on their responsibilities try and run their lives. I do this for two reasons because I care for them but also to create the life I desire. But I have...	Tracy	2	370	Feb 28, 2009 by maresie
	Teaching our children about faith (Preview) My son came home yesterday completely devastated. He had left his IPOD on the school bus and just knew he would never see it again. It hurt him even more because he had worked making clay pens and snakes and selling them, and saved every penny to buy it with, and $250 is ALOT of money for a child to make on h...	shellyj123	5	636	Feb 28, 2009 by Peggy7
	recommending Transforming Our Losses on Depression (Preview) On Wednesday I split off altogether from my crazy friend. I feel like an a**hole for doing it but I was losing my mind. I spent yesterday and the day before depressed and numb. It's hard to get out of bed. My phone doesn't work. My wallet disappeared. I feel like my sponsor's pretty well sick of me and g...	gngcrzy	8	630	Feb 28, 2009 by Tracy
	problem (Preview) every time I submit a new post one of those little black ticks is at the side saying no posts. How do I get rid of this so people asnwer my posts? -- Edited by Tracy at 10:41, 2009-02-28 -- Edited by Tracy at 10:42, 2009-02-28	Tracy	0	344	Feb 28, 2009 by Tracy
	Stressful Week..... (Preview) It has been a hard week, my AS has been on a binge this week came in and made got me so very upset, I tried to be calm and matter of fact, but after he left I was a wreck. I gave him food and some snacks to take with him, I am not at the place yet where I can completely put him out of my life. I look at him and I see what he...	DreamsOver	8	500	Feb 28, 2009 by shellyj123
	Got a job offer (Preview) I requested an internal transfer. I interviewed. I received a letter offering me the job. I think it would be a good move to learn a new subject area. Learn new skills. Something to put on my resume. Same pay. I would get away from an antagonistic co-worker. Well, it would put me in the same dept. as my AHso...	nmike	11	601	Feb 27, 2009 by Toto814
	Letting go day in day out (Preview) At the moment I am working very consciously to shed the victim role which I am very famiiar with. Besides an attitude change for me it means lots of letting go. When I give someone something I have to let go of how they use it. When I am misunderstood often I have to let go that people don't understand me....	maresie	6	650	Feb 27, 2009 by Ness
	Why are all the stories the same (Preview) This is what I dont understand. It seems to be the same story from everyone. The A drinks too much, crosses serious lines in relationships, then moves out and runs away from everything leaving destruction behind. Why is it the same story? What is it about this disease that makes them so selfish and...	Cyn	18	654	Feb 27, 2009 by Ness
	What a Morning.... Love my Lt. Sissy... (Preview) Well this morning I was slow moving... Couldn't be my Mo Jo together to get up and get my feet in "Go" mode... Well after hitting the snooze button several times, my handsome son comes up the steps with the look of "Mom Is Still In Bed?" So I carried my lazy butt down the steps and hit t...	Jozie	5	479	Feb 27, 2009 by Hoot Nanny
	Building a relationship with HP... (Preview) I have been working and reworking step 2 and 3 for a while now. Today, during a deliberate consultation with my HP I started thinking about how capable I have been in having an imaginary relationship with my aH and how easy it was (is) for me to create something that isn't. It can be good. It can be bad. I hav...	Rora	3	594	Feb 27, 2009 by hotrod
	Am I cracking up? (Preview) (((((Family)))), Am I cracking up (Christy don't answer that! ) or does it appear to others that the lists of posts and their fonts have gotten smaller? I have increased the text size, but it still seems to me like the heading above the lists of post has remained the same, but the topic list has shrunk. ...	Karilynn	7	518	Feb 27, 2009 by ddub
	Words from my HP (Preview) So, I was driving home last week, thinking and thinking and thinking about the path my AH is taking. His father told me he wouldn't be surprised if the A lost everything AGAIN and had to go back to their place. So I was unconsciusly working out a plan of what WE would do when HE lost everything LOL, and aski...	Priscilla83	4	452	Feb 27, 2009 by ddub
	How do deal...How to heal??? (Preview) My husband passed from alcoholic poisoning and I'm having a difficult time. Some of his family blames me for his death. I tried to get him help more than once. I took him to detox but it didn't stick. So i gave him and ultimatum to chose his family and get help or his addiction. a few days later he got check in...	angel mom	10	687	Feb 27, 2009 by Christy
	Something that bothers me here... (Preview) Our dear Maria is always the one to post everyone's Birthday. (Even just after having surgery.) Thanks Maria, I think it's so thoughtful of you to remember and take the time. Here's what bothers me...you can see how many people took the time to view the "happy birthday" post. How hard is i...	Christy	13	704	Feb 27, 2009 by Christy
	Hope for Today... (Preview) Today's passage from Hope for Today describes how I have forgiven in the past...accepting unacceptable behaviors...I was more less trying to forget it than to forgive. That is why I sunk deep into the past events and relive them over and over in my mind. I have not truly worked through the resentments...	brightmommy	3	442	Feb 27, 2009 by nmike
	Codependant crazies......Out of control like a snowball heading downhill (Preview) "Please free my thinking of self will, self seeking, dishonesty and wrong motives". That is a part of a prayer I pray every morning, usually before my feet hit the floor. Yesterday was no different, of course with some limited contact from the EXABF on Tuesday, again my world was feeling a...	shellyj123	9	1060	Feb 26, 2009 by luvinmom
	please help me (Preview) see my last thread to understand this. i haven't the strength to repeat it. he made contact and we spoke to each other with respect and then... i lost it. last thursday night i told him on email how i felt, how lost i was. his reply was to tell me that this was all about 'him getting better'. he instigated no c...	tabi1	20	782	Feb 26, 2009 by kitty
	Happy!! (Preview) I'm happy!1 I'm living alone with my daughter and feeling good. Things with my Ah are fine, I joke with him that I see him more, now that we are not living together. Also, I successfully stated rules NO drinking in my place, and No coming by drunk. And yesterday he called me drunk and I had the ability to tel...	Priscilla83	5	428	Feb 26, 2009 by Priscilla83
	Good awkward, bad awkward (Preview) Well as you know one person who I had hoped was going to be a friend of mine let me down after promising to meet me sometime last week. This morning was the first time I've seen her since the "stood up". I discussed this issue in therapy so I was well aware this is something I'm pretty awkward at. ...	maresie	5	1108	Feb 26, 2009 by maresie
	Back from Dubai and still waiting in limbo..... (Preview) Hello, I had some lovely responses to my situation when my AH announced from thousands of miles away, that he no longer loved me as a husband should love a wife, that people needed him more than he needed them, that he was like his father (always absent from his life) and that his alcohol problem wasnt goi...	Lilly Burn	7	1015	Feb 26, 2009 by Lilly Burn
	The OLD me v/s the NEW me......... (Preview) Well yesterday I feel like I passed a test finally:) EXABF sent me a comment to my blog about MY 12 step program.....said I was "absolutely glowing" (so he must have been checking out my picts also) and welcomed me to the world of recovery so to speak. The old me would have had to comment back...	shellyj123	9	591	Feb 26, 2009 by Jean4444
	Alcohol Poisioning (Preview) Hello! I have been reading alot about alcohol poisioning. My AH drinks every night to the point of passing out every single time he drinks. In reading the information he as showed several symptoms of poisoning like being unconscious, his body sometimes shakes terribly, sometimes he will stop bre...	desperate for help	5	611	Feb 25, 2009 by Christy
	Newbie to alanon, life after treatment (Preview) Hi Everyone! I am so excited to have found this board. My fiance is currently in treatment for drug/alcohol addiction. So far things are going well and he seems positive (has been in treatment before). I guess i am worried about life when he comes back. I hear so many horror stories about early rec...	inhisarms	8	668	Feb 25, 2009 by Jozie
	Do I go to see him in the hospital or do I not?? Wow...tough one. (Preview) My AH is in the hospital for his drinking. FInally after 3+ days worth, he is in detoxing. I went to see the alcohol counselor yesterday that I had set up for us. We were supposed to go together. He suggested that I go and see him last night. I did. Should I go again today???? I am in turmoil. As much as I know...	Canary	10	526	Feb 25, 2009 by inhisarms
	Allowing others to move forward and keeping steady myself (Preview) I am not a chaser - I am someone who runs. Every single time a relationship hits a rocky spot and the man in my life walks away from me, I change my number, and keep my distance. I cant fix my A - he is broken. He turns to alcohol to have a good time with friends, having to party it up and prove how cool he is. And...	Cyn	5	500	Feb 25, 2009 by maresie
	f2f as a couple....any thoughts on this? (Preview) A few of you have suggested that husb may like to come to meetings with me. He is always interested in hearing what I learn from f2f and from posting here. I feel however that if he were there at meetings with me my ability to share would be comprimised.....although I know we can participate in th...	Ness	7	501	Feb 25, 2009 by Ness
	Newbie - Concerned sister (Preview) There is a lot of info on this site and my situation is probably already been advised upon. If someone could send me a link to the appropriate topics, I would be grateful. Brother is 35. Was a functioning alcoholic until a year ago. Quit his job and hasn't done anything since. Went through his saving...	superdebby	7	556	Feb 25, 2009 by maresie
	Celebration (Preview) http://www.oprah.com/slideshow/oathome/slideshow4_ss_tours0206/1	maresie	3	453	Feb 25, 2009 by maire rua
	Doing Well (Preview) Hello all. I haven't posted in a while, but look on frequently. I've been doing well. Haven't had contact with my ex bf for five months now. (He left and I don't know where he is - I believe he is staying with his "friends".) I am still going to my meetings, use my slogans regularly and am t...	mslouise	4	411	Feb 25, 2009 by buick23
	Hurting (Preview) I just read someone's post about how hurt people hurt people, and in the end they really are hurting themselves. It made me think about alot. I spent 3 years with a man who fought me every step of the way to starting a life together. Every single stage we went through: moving in with me, getting over hom...	Cyn	4	565	Feb 25, 2009 by Jerry F
	Just for Today (Preview) Hope For Today page 50 Thought for the Day says...It takes courage to change. now that i have a Higher Power and program friends to help me, i know there are no limits to my recovery in Al-Anon... Today I am taking the courage to change my behaviors so that I can be a healthier person. I can trust in my HP an...	brightmommy	3	436	Feb 25, 2009 by Jerry F
	Never thought I would be back here.... (Preview) 3 1/2 years ago I walked away from a man who I was so disgustingly in love with because he was addicted to pills. Now, I feel like I am doing the same thing with someone else I loved, planned to marry, etc. because he is drinking to the point he is becoming violent with me. Two weeks ago was not the first time...	Cyn	8	554	Feb 25, 2009 by Jerry F
	PROGRESS UPDATE (Preview) Hello again wonderful Alanoners, It's been a long time since I posted but I just wanted to check in and also let some of my dear Alanoners know that I still care. I don't get to go online very often these days,but when I can I do try to look in. I am doing great..........but it occurred to me the other day that...	chris52	7	512	Feb 24, 2009 by Rora
	Testing times (Preview) The events of the last 10 days re my Ason have been testing to say the least. He called us for help (which we took seriously, as he's extremely stubborn and protective of his disease and never asks for help) and we (husb & I) have been in discussions with the people in his assisted housing as to...	Ness	8	472	Feb 24, 2009 by Ness
	chat room 101 (Preview) I was talking to a friend of mine about how clueless our parents can be about the internet - IMing, chat rooms, message boards.....etc.... how can u explain how to use those things? IM I can explain but how do u explain how to use a chat room or a message board or explain how it works? Lanchas	Lanchas	3	431	Feb 24, 2009 by Jozie
	Looking for ESH, financial issues, trust, etc (Preview) Hello all! I am hoping if I post the goings on of my day today that there maight be others out there that have ESH that might relate. I am truly at a loss of what to do. I plan to call my f2f sponsor in the morning about this issue as well, but I figure the more esh the better!! My AH told me today that he stole, li...	kam1974	6	658	Feb 24, 2009 by aunitedway
	Saturday's Birthday Girl - Jonibaloni (Preview) Maria gets her best singing voice tuned (oh wait, better not ) Happy Birthday to you Dear Jonibaloni. I hope your day was the best! love ya, YourMaria	Maria123	10	490	Feb 24, 2009 by aunitedway
	"WHY" (Preview) (Guys) Not be on in like agessssssss......This was a poem i wrote this morning and decided to share it with you all. I know you will understand it only two well. Hope your all doing well, and shall catch up soon.....Take care.. WHY:: Why do i laugh, Why do i cry, Why do folks leave me, and not say goodbye...	ally	6	556	Feb 24, 2009 by aunitedway
	My brain sucks (Preview) I broke things off with my qualifier over Christmas. Last Sunday he made a date for this Sunday (yesterday) to sort of reconnect and see how things stand. Okay- I'll give it a shot. (Cue 7 days of angsting over it- should I cancel? How am I going to stay serene and not punch him in the nose?) Turned out I did...	gngcrzy	6	698	Feb 24, 2009 by maresie
	Hurt People Hurt People - Take Two (Preview) Hurt people hurt people. I got it, or so I thought. I learned that all those invitations for fights that I chose to go to only led me to hurt people. If someone lashed out at me, my instinctive reaction was to lambaste them right back and harder if I could. Now I know. I got that part through many, many 24 ho...	Maria123	6	808	Feb 24, 2009 by Cyn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.