The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
It's been a long time since I posted but I just wanted to check in and also let some of my dear Alanoners know that I still care. I don't get to go online very often these days,but when I can I do try to look in.
I am doing great..........but it occurred to me the other day that I should actually post this as without all the wonderful support and ESH shared here on this board by such selfless,wonderful people.....I wouldn't be in this place today. I learned so much here and took those tools you all so selflessly gave me and used them to find my own serenity again.
It's been a tough ride,that I cannot deny but I am doing just fine. Still have contact with my ex AB.........he is still drinking and I am supportive and loving but very,very detached. Strange thing..........last November I had an accident and ended up in hospital in Istanbul ( I live in Turkey) having surgery. My ex was there when I woke up from the anaesthetic and remained by my side for the first 4 days ( only leaving me once to go and get drunk!!!- I even handled that with serenity- thanks guys) and after was discharged took me to his home and looked after me until I was well enough to return to my own home in the south of turkey. We had some very deep conversations during this time,but...importantly he acknowledged that my turfing him out to find his own way was the right thing to do. There was a lot of anger on his part at the time,but he now accepts that I did exactly the right thing and that whilst he still hasn't found sobriety,he does understand why I did what I did and agrees it was right for me to do so. On the occassions he went out drinking I remained completely at ease and took myself off to bed and read contentedly and thanked HP that I am now in a place where I can detach with love. Took me a long time to get my head round how it was possible to do that......again,THANK YOU all.
I have met several men who wanted a closer relationship with me and I have been amazed at how this programme has completely changed my outlook. Not one of those men had anything I wanted and I felt no shame in telling them that in a kind and gentle way. Indeed I have made some very nice friends and using everything I learned here have succeeded in maintaining my self confidence and not allowing someone else's desires to overshadow my own needs and what I really want. So.......no boyfriends to report LOL!.....but I am cool with that. I have been single 3 years now and enjoy the company of many different men and women friends and am really proud of who I have become.
What I am trying to say is this...........I couldn't have done it without you. I am strong,independent and proud.
Nice to see your smiling face. I remember when you came here. The transformation is wonderful and inspiring. Pipers and I miss your posts. Stay well and email when you can. I can't wait to see pictures of your grandson! Has it really been 3 years?!! Yikes! I don't know about you, but I'm not getting older - the rest of the world is! Much love and blessings to you and your family. Take good care of yourself.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I am so very grateful you took the time to share your ESH . It is evident that although life is not problem free you have found the mircles that Al Anon offers.
Your confidence, self esteem, gratitude and compassion are clearly visible in your post. Thanks for giving us Hope.
The program and the tools do work and I agree it is not without work, hard decisions, and pain but HP is there all along the way guiding our steps.
The old me never wanted to feel the pain, make the hard decisions or do the work. Somehow I wanted it all handed to me .
I thank God every day for alanon because I found the courage to make the hard decisons, feel the pain and start to become the person I always wanted to be . I am still a work in progress one day at a time
I've often wondered about you and how you are doing. I'm so glad to hear from you. Gosh! I recall how scary it was there for you for a while. Keep in touch more often would ya? Am PMing you my e-mail.
Christy
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If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
Thanks for coming back, and sharing your ESH... You make us all know that it can be done, with hard work and alot of faith... Good luck to you and your family... Wishing you well...Keep coming back.. We haven't went know were : )