|
|
How to Prepare for Hubby home from detox
(Preview)
I'm new to posting but have been lurking for a while. You have all been very insirational and helpful. I see a myself in all of you. I have been using detachment and boundaries for a while now, and it finally had an impact on my AH. He finally understood over the weekend that he has a huge problem, and...
|
MissyPoo
|
10
|
852
|
|
|
|
|
Robbed
(Preview)
(((Family))), My mother's jewlery was taken from my apartment. I noticed this morning when I went to look for a specific pair of earrings and I couldn't find them. I thought I had leant them to my niece for her vacation and couldn't remember doing so. When I went to look for them in my box I noticed some o...
|
Karilynn
|
16
|
937
|
|
|
|
|
new to group - need suggestions: sick meetings
(Preview)
Dear All, Thank you to the people who facilitate this. I am going to just give it a whirl, and am grateful for the opportuinty. I moved to the UK four years ago and W-O-W are there some cultural differences. Istarted my recovery in NEw York City. I am very much in stress over how to proceed with my recovery...
|
alanonicScotland
|
4
|
584
|
|
|
|
|
Coping....
(Preview)
Before I found the ES&H here at MIP, and my f2f meetings, I would not have been able to do what I'm doing now to give support to my son. I feel I have progressed (slowly), step by step, since January when the days seemed so dark I didn't want to get out of bed ever again. In detaching from my A son's d...
|
Ness
|
3
|
706
|
|
|
|
|
Accepting my reality...even if it is painful
(Preview)
I've been thinking a lot about acceptance lately. I've always considered myself as one whom is pretty in touch with reality...funny, "considered" does not necessarily mean truth. Having given it further thought, I think that what I do when I don't like my reality or when I find it painfu...
|
Rora
|
5
|
1084
|
|
|
|
|
That was a Shock!!
(Preview)
I had mentioned to my husband the other day that I was thinking about going to the 2009 Arizona Area Al-Anon/Alateen Convention being held June 5 - 7 in Tucson. I wasn't sure if I could definitely go since I wasn't sure what my husband's schedule would be like (whether or not he'd be back to work by then)...
|
N8SMOM
|
2
|
786
|
|
|
|
|
Recovery
(Preview)
My former spouse has been fighting the disease for going on ten years. Finally, last year she entered a treatment program to which she bought in to; admitting to herself that she has a problem and wanting to overcome it. She completed that treatment last fall and has had a relapse or two along the way....
|
TheArtOf
|
1
|
686
|
|
|
|
|
So sad tonight!!!!
(Preview)
A very good friend of mine is in the hospital and is not expected to live. I have known Helen for over 27 years. She and her husband were the first friendship my husband and I formed after we first got married. She survived cancer only to probably die from pneumonia. She is on a respirator and cannot sp...
|
clara
|
11
|
810
|
|
|
|
|
Coping & Gratitude
(Preview)
(((Family))), Good morning my family. Needless to say, it hasn't been a fun couple of days. I am still uncomfortable in my home. Even though there was no forced entry I am sleeping with a light on in the other room. I am double checking my locks, etc. I know this is normal after this. It's gonna take s...
|
Karilynn
|
4
|
683
|
|
|
|
|
The 12 Steps of Pre-Program
(Preview)
Good morning, (((Family))) Today is the 5 yr anniversary of the first time I drug myself to a recovery meeting. This meeting was at an AA/Al-Anon conference that my now ex-wife's sponsor asked my ex to suggest I attend. I will be leaving after lunch today to go to that very same conference (I have made...
|
david62
|
12
|
823
|
|
|
|
|
Reality
(Preview)
When my (now sober) Abf and I got back together last year I think we were both being niave and unrealistic. I think we thought it would all work out now that he's sober. Unfortunately it's harder than both of us thought it would be. And I think that might be mainly down to me. I'm finding it hard to trust...
|
jiver76
|
4
|
860
|
|
|
|
|
Always Take Care Of Yourself First
(Preview)
Hello All, Taking care of yourself first was one of the first things I heard when I walked through the doors of Al-Anon 2 1/2 years ago. After a few meetings it hit home with me and I have done my best to do that very thing. Yet, I was reminded once again last Tuesday night at my Al-Anon meeting that I don't al...
|
RLC
|
6
|
1667
|
|
|
|
|
Still Learning My Strengths & Weakness's
(Preview)
I haven't been much of a help these last couple of days to anyone, including myself, those that are following along with my "Drama" Know that it has been Long & Drug out when it comes to Abrother, and Deseased Afather's belongings... I am starting to feel more Strength in the things I am g...
|
Jozie
|
3
|
973
|
|
|
|
|
Is this being too controlling
(Preview)
My husband will more than likely be getting out of detox today (been in since Friday). He doesn't want to stay at the facility for their In-Patient program because he's already done that (3 years ago). He said that he plans to go to AA meetings until he can find an Out-Patient Program that works for him...
|
N8SMOM
|
6
|
785
|
|
|
|
|
Purrrrrfection is better than perfection...
(Preview)
Yes, PURRRRRFECTION is better than PERFECTION NO, I have NOT LOST THE PLOT: read on... The last couple of weeks have been trying to say the least, however, I am now quite certain that the programme is beginning to work for me in a most incredible way. Some of you will know that my relationship with my daug...
|
Suzannah
|
4
|
721
|
|
|
|
|
Introverted anyone?
(Preview)
None of my friends would call me an introvert. However in the past few months, I'm a hermit. I hate leaving my house. My husband has cheated on me and I honestly felt like I had PTSD. I have a very hard time leaving the house. The phone will ring and it shakes me to the core. I'm VERY happy in my comfort zo...
|
Inpain
|
7
|
787
|
|
|
|
|
sponsorship
(Preview)
A new comer is reaching out to me I have given her my number and have given her a lift to meetings ect. I have answered her texts and tried to encourage her to keep coming back. Has anyone got any ESH on the first time in their recovery when new people began to turn to them. I have only been in recovery for 18...
|
Tracy
|
2
|
544
|
|
|
|
|
Family of Origin!
(Preview)
I am seriously dysfunctional. For many reasons...hey, aren't we all? I'm NOW learning all this about myself and slowly, daily trying to recover from years of self loathing and never feeling worthy enough. If you were to have asked me about my parents BEFORE my husband's infidelity and our big brea...
|
Inpain
|
2
|
791
|
|
|
|
|
Hello everybody
(Preview)
Hello I'm new to the board/forum as I need help coping with my wife who is a drunk. she's a funtional drunk as she holds a very good job and when she comes home she starts drinking. yes we've had words about it and now she attempts to hide the bottles all over the house. she doesn't believe she has a drinking p...
|
Dakota111
|
11
|
754
|
|
|
|
|
Feeling very Selfish
(Preview)
I've been attending several Al-Anon meetings for almost 3 weeks now and have found a few "favorites," one of them being Monday night at 8:00 (I really like all the people there). Well I just found out that the Out-Patient Program my husband wants to get into is on Mon., Tue., and Thur. I can...
|
N8SMOM
|
10
|
770
|
|
|
|
|
For Myself
(Preview)
I finally ordered Getting Them Sober. A highly recommended book by al-anoners. I am looking forward to reading it and learning from it! Just another baby step for me. Holly
|
Holly09
|
3
|
393
|
|
|
|
|
Where Did We Learn To Be Normal?
(Preview)
All non-instinctive human behavior is learned. Instinctive would be breathing, eating, going to the bathroom, seeking shelter, a desire for companionship, and a drive to procreate. Pretty much everything else is learned. So where have we learned to be normal? Most of us who grew up in alcohol...
|
barisax
|
15
|
1030
|
|
|
|
|
Can't outdistance my HP...
(Preview)
Aloha Family... Part of my day was taking some "stuff" to the local AA club that they might use in their meetings. It was raining (duh...) still and there was a young fellow sitting in a chair outside in the covered waiting area smoking cigarettes. No eye contact no body language to signa...
|
Jerry F
|
6
|
1085
|
|
|
|
|
Lake Area Round-Up Convention
(Preview)
This weekend is the Lake Area Round-Up AA Convention in Lake Charles, Louisiana. On Saturday I will be the Al-Anon Speaker at 1 pm. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. This will be my first time to share my story since leaving my ex in November. My ex is still attending meetings and "play...
|
Rita G
|
6
|
862
|
|
|
|
|
Is this the calm before the storm
(Preview)
Have not heard from daughter since her phone call admonishing us for not taking her to Houston with us for Easter. She has not called, and neither have I. After listening again to her message, we are very sure she was drinking. She is supposed to be in therapy for the mental part of her addiction. I am n...
|
clara
|
3
|
796
|
|
|
|
|
Typical Co-Dependent
(Preview)
Yes. You would see my picture in the dictionary next to the definition. I can't make a decision to save my life. So, I'm hoping others here can give opinions and at least I can TRY to make a decision. First a small history...My AH cheated on me last fall. I found out in December and it's been a horrific e...
|
Inpain
|
8
|
734
|
|
|
|
|
acceptance....
(Preview)
acceptance.... came to me to fill my heart as i walked thru the first three steps. ... i knew my life had become unmanageable ... i had accepted i needed alanons help. once i had this .. the will the ability to allow my higher power to help me came easier. it got easier each day to...
|
aunitedway
|
4
|
1073
|
|
|
|
|
Why cant????
(Preview)
Why can't people just say what they're thinking/feeling and let the chips fall where they may? Seems as if it's always I'm gonna tell em this but I'm really thinking that or I'm only gonna tell part of what I'm feeling and not say the rest for fear of what the other may say or do. The other thing is why can'...
|
carolinagirl
|
5
|
597
|
|
|
|
|
How can I miss him..am I delusional
(Preview)
For the strangest reason, i find myself missing my ex AH more not less, even though my life is calmer. Because he got in touch via silent phone calls, i thought he missed me, he was just waiting to have a go at me (see previous post) but now his sister has asked him to leave me alone, now i feel left alone..fri...
|
Lilly Burn
|
10
|
676
|
|
|
|
|
Thanks
(Preview)
I just wanted to let everyone know i thank you for all your advise and help on the board. My dad the night b-4 came to me and stated that he wanted me to give my AH a message from him about that he love's and cares about him like a son and he hope's that him and i work it out. I told him why dont you tell him? He said ok...
|
Aquastrm
|
2
|
576
|
|
|
|
|
F2F
(Preview)
...it seems as if its a broken record- try to attend some face to face al-anon meetings and see what happens! All you have to lose is an hour of your time or less because you can always choose to walk out if you want. Its the most basic and most relevant piece of information on this board that is often repea...
|
Jean4444
|
7
|
763
|
|
|
|
|
Ruff Weekend
(Preview)
Hello all, Ok gotta get it off my chest and get opinions on the coversation with my AH this weekend. Well it started off with him getting drunk to the point of falling out of the shower 3 times while taking a 15 min shower. Then when it came down to dinner he wouldnt come into the house due to the fact my parent...
|
Aquastrm
|
6
|
845
|
|
|
|
|
I am trying not to be so angry
(Preview)
The other night my son was sucker punched, dragged from the metro in D.C., kicked while he was down on the ground by 6 black punks. 6 against 1. Wheres the justice in that? He's all of 150 lbs. and 5'8". And all because he stood up for other people who he felt were more vulnerable than he was. No one else...
|
Maria123
|
14
|
929
|
|
|
|
|
Been talking to the ex AH
(Preview)
The ex got a cell phone and we have been talking and texting. It has been friendly and polite although I know he wants me back and I'm not interested in going down that road again not to mention I'm very happy with someone else now. I'm hoping we can be "friends" and he can see the kids and maint...
|
carolinagirl
|
4
|
680
|
|
|
|
|
I'll feel better eventually
(Preview)
So yesterday was Easter and I made all the phone calls to wish folks a happy easter. Momma called me back and tells me up front that Sarah Sperry, my step sister, had a huge fiasco. She had moved down to TX with her boyfriend and moved in with him, not engaged, no backup plan, etc. And I was like, from the begi...
|
Tiger2006
|
6
|
741
|
|
|
|
|
Still stuck in this feelingless, confusing, numb fog.....What is HP trying to tell me?
(Preview)
As much as I wish I wasn't...I am.... still stuck. Still unable to move forward just yet. I'm getting to work, and taking care of my son and other things are still falling behind-laundry, yard work and other chores, and being a single parent this is not good. Haven't heard from EXABF and I can'...
|
shellyj123
|
6
|
1588
|
|
|
|
|
my recovery
(Preview)
Havent posted for a bit my computer playing up again. I was doing so well after the convention really got the focus on me although I decided to let AB go to be able to do this. Does recovery count if you can only do it when single its not detaching with love. But I never did it to make him change I did it cause...
|
Tracy
|
3
|
816
|
|
|
|
|
I Can't Keep All The Balls In The Air.......
(Preview)
my AS just called, he is working on his bathroom (he stays rent free in a home I own), now he says he need a new hot water heater, we have helped with buying the fixtures he has needed. Also, he needs new tires, he needs to pay a ticket ($500) next week for not having car insurance, he needs to buy the car insur...
|
DreamsOver
|
9
|
615
|
|
|
|
|
Not Sure What Will Happen Next...
(Preview)
Hello all! I am returning to the board after realizing I can not do this alone anymore. My husbands drinking is spiraling out of control. We have a beautiful 8 year old daughter that deserves a normal childhood. She rarely has friends over since he is so unpredictable. I am a teacher in a local pub...
|
odaat
|
10
|
711
|
|
|
|
|
Three Sad Sports Related Stories - one common theme.... alcohol
(Preview)
I just got back from a wonderful holiday with my kids to Southern California, Disneyland, etc... One of our many highlights was to take in an LA Angels v. Oakland A's baseball game, and we did so on April 8th. The starting pitcher for the A's that night was a young 23-year old - Nick Adenhart - who pitche...
|
canadianguy
|
7
|
929
|
|
|
|
|
Just wanted to say thank you
(Preview)
Just wanted to thank you for everything yesterday. I needed to be mad to get to the serenity. I'm feeling alot better today. Thanks again.
|
Tiger2006
|
1
|
483
|
|
|
|
|
A Touch Conflicted ???
(Preview)
OK, So... Tonight i have to call the land owners and see if they will agree to let baby Sister move in the trailer, they have done said... NO WAY Abrother, but I am HOPING for HP to carry me thru on this one... Here's the thing... When I got the certified letter, I called and told Abrother that he had till the...
|
Jozie
|
3
|
760
|
|
|
|
|
He's a different person now
(Preview)
My husband and I have been together for 14 years now. We were 20 when we met. Drinking and partying were part of the age we were in but he had never slowed down. He has always been so easy going, funny, great sense of humor. He has been sober now for about 3 1/2 months. I know it's not that long but he is a to...
|
Holly9
|
9
|
893
|
|
|
|
|
He doesnt like when my daughter...
(Preview)
...my stomach hurts becasue of this recurring issue. I am mad at myself for not being able to handle it... Ive been remarried almost three years. My husband doesnt like it when my teenage daughter has friends over. I think its because his own daughters don't live with us and he feels jealous or sad. Bu...
|
Jehnifer
|
4
|
979
|
|
|
|
|
Experience has.....
(Preview)
sapped my Strength of late, but still hanging on to Hope by my fingernails. ALCOHOLISM is an EXPERIENCE of the last six years that has taken me to my knees.... My strength finally departed a few weeks ago...... after weeks of cries for help from my Ason, with him rejecting suggestions (all which ha...
|
Ness
|
6
|
743
|
|
|
|
|
Gratitude...
(Preview)
Simply thank you all for your unconditional if not also inspiring and humbling love. Of course you are in my life by design and will of a Power Greater than Jerry F. My HP really lives and I can no longer outdistance HP as I once thought I had. Beyond my imagination. You all are real and really beyond m...
|
Jerry F
|
7
|
920
|
|
|
|
|
Things are looking up for the moment!
(Preview)
So my ex ah (now boyfriend) and I went to visit our son in Juvie Sunday. He seems to finally be adjusting. Granted he hates it in there but is adjusting to the fact that he is stuck in there until May 5 and he had best just deal with it. He is still craving McDonalds of all things and has requested we make a st...
|
QOD
|
1
|
520
|
|
|
|
|
She make me so angry!!!
(Preview)
Hubby and I went to Houston to see our "other daughter". She has a very normal life; no drama, thank God. She is the mother of my two beautiful twin granddaughters and is happily married. While we were there(been there about 30 minutes) and my cell rings. It is ADaugher. She actually did...
|
clara
|
6
|
602
|
|
|
|
|
My son is in Juvie now
(Preview)
Well, this is what I have been pushing for the last 6 months. I have been working w/the school and the police to build a case against my son, proving that he is unruly and out of control so that I could get some help for him. I figured he needed a wake up call, eye opener from inside the Juvenile Detention Ho...
|
QOD
|
8
|
624
|
|
|
|
|
Grrrr attitude
(Preview)
Okay headed off to the Super Saturday Al-Anon Family Group meeting without any expectations other than life would continue to be just the same ole, same ole gray dreary pain in the butt it has been lately. Of course before getting in the car one of my fishing poles that I tried to stack wouldn't cooper...
|
Jerry F
|
16
|
664
|
|
|
|
|
Get'n it back,,, One Day At A time... :)
(Preview)
Hello MIP Family... Just wanted to wish you each and everyone a very Blessed Easter... I am beginning to get my wind back, it is a slow moving train, but at least it is going forward instead of backwords which I will take for now...Had a great dinner with my mom and sister, & niece.. .I think the best th...
|
Jozie
|
4
|
517
|
|
|
|
|
Happy Easter
(Preview)
Just wanted to wish my extended family Happy Easter. God Bless !
|
peacewithin
|
6
|
430
|
|
|
|
|
Feeling guilty ... but not picking up the phone
(Preview)
My A left a message a couple of hours ago saying he was being discharged from a hospital and asking if he could sleep in my van, then answered his own question with "it's probably no but I've got nowhere to go." I haven't taken any of his calls in 48 hours. But I know if I talk to him, I'll probabl...
|
lmw
|
8
|
654
|
|
|
|
|
New to the Board, not new to Alanon
(Preview)
Good Morning and Happy Easter to all of those who celebrate this holiday -- I am new to this board but, not to the Alanon program itself, although I have been feeling its work in my life slip away as of late. I grew up with trauma and abuse in my life and have always struggled with self esteem and perpetual in...
|
RunnerChick
|
7
|
572
|
|
|
|
|
Is it possible?
(Preview)
I know everyone's different, but is it possible for someone who has been drinking off and on (mostly ON) since he was 18 and he's now 59 to stop WITHOUT medical detox from a facility? He now admits that for the last couple of years he's been drinking huge amounts all at once and blacking out at times, unab...
|
milana24
|
1
|
809
|
|
|
|
|
Still hanging in there!
(Preview)
What can I say? I am still about the same. Life is good but sometimes I feel like I am living with no purpose. I haven't been attending enough Alanon meetings lately & my serenity really isn't there. I struggle with anger & being short with my AH. He doesn't do anything to provoke all of the r...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
2
|
540
|
|
|
|
|
New here & it's all come to a head
(Preview)
I don't really believe this is all happening, but my looking the other way has finally caught up with me. My 59 year old bf and I have been living separately, but been together as a couple for most of the last 35 years. I'm 57 and we met when I was in college at 18 years old. The last year was an absolute nigh...
|
milana24
|
8
|
598
|
|
|
|
|
Two questions - 1 about control?
(Preview)
I have two questions. The first leads me to the second. My A and I had counceling this week and he has been dry 4 months. Our conselor said to start some activities with non-alcohol drinking friends. My A was very excited about doing that, only has no idea how. He doesn't know ANYONE on a friendship l...
|
Inpain
|
11
|
730
|
|
|
|
|
Still holding on......digging in with both feet.
(Preview)
Wasn't planning on going to my F2F meeting last night. Really didn't feel I had anything to offer anyone anywhere and had no intention of going in there and raining on everyone's parade with my "I don't know if I want to be a part of this program anymore or not" attitude. Well my sis in law had...
|
shellyj123
|
5
|
635
|
|
|
|
|
Resisting the urge to fix everything for him....
(Preview)
My A picked up again last Friday night. He got paid for a half month and today the money is gone. After being sober since mid-December, he's once again in the grips. It seems like he does this dance twice a year, minimum - spring and fall. And I'm resisting the urge to help him. He's got an arrest warra...
|
lmw
|
7
|
619
|
|
