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Moving--Again!
(Preview)
So...Scared. But ok. I got a job. In topeka. I'm moving. Again Yes. I'm scared. I'm scared of alot of things. But God bless america. I'm not dead yet. I'm not dead yet. I need y'all to remind me that I have the strength to do this again. Y'all got me through moving to KY. Things are different. My mom's fam...
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Tiger2006
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8
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573
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Ok I feel so stupid
(Preview)
I have not dated or even talked to any man since my AH. I have been alone for years now. So I go on this JW match site. sigh. NOT me to do this as you guys well know. I am in no way knowledgeable how to do this. I have always been persude. Did I spell that right? OK Chased. Being on my mountain the chances of meeting...
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debilyn
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15
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757
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My sweet Beagle is very sick; what next???
(Preview)
Our sweet Beagle, Bonnie Lou is very sick and probably will not be with us much longer. She is 12 years old; has congestive heart failure and now has bronchitus. Took her to the vet this morning and spent a ton of money(I would spend my last dime) for her meds. She is coughing and coughing. Yes, dogs c...
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clara
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11
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892
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Monday, Monday :)
(Preview)
Hey y'all, I'm doing ok. Y'all made a huge difference yesterday. I need to add a PS to yesterday: So my stepfather called Su afternoon and mediates. he agrees that it's my life, my move, etc. He suggests that I'm stressed ( duh) and when I get stressed I get a little dictatorial (ok, I can get that) and t...
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Tiger2006
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2
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870
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can I do both?
(Preview)
I am the daughter of an alcoholic. My boyfriend is also, in my definition, an alcoholic. I have noticed that in the past year, I might also be an alcoholic. However, when I went to an alanon meeting, I could relate to everything they were saying about the frustrations and the effects that growing up in an...
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cidiera
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8
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878
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Baby steps today, but moving forward not backward...
(Preview)
Thanks to everyone who responded to my last post, where EXABF sent me the Mom's day card. I realize that I do not need to know WHY he did it, nor his motivation-as I doubt even he does. However he does know me well enough to know that I am ALL about manners, always have been, so I will reply with a sho...
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shellyj123
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3
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738
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Oh the Ups and Downs
(Preview)
Last summer when things were getting increasingly difficult w/my teen son, my exAH started coming around more to help me with him. The more time we spent together, the more I realized I missed him. The good times with him. His laugh, his touch, his presence in general. I blame part of this on being a...
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QOD
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12
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888
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Need Help On Step 4
(Preview)
I don't know how to even start . We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. How did you do it ? Please HELP !
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peacewithin
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8
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4815
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Awakening To Choices - Massachusetts Alanon Conference, May 15 - 17, 2009
(Preview)
Just thought I would share for anyone/everyone who's from this area that next weekend is the Annual Massachusetts Alanon Conference "Awakening to Choices." If you are nearby, think about attending. The conferences are wonderful, a weekend of recovery with "those who understan...
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Maria123
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4
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742
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Focus, focus hocus pocus
(Preview)
It's a wonderful magic trick, when I focus on you I disappear!
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cichlid6
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4
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723
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O' happy day..with A mom and A hubby..
(Preview)
today was sooo sweet. we've planned this all week. and it couldn't not have gone any better. my a hubby boiled seafood for my a mom and my bestfriend and me today. good food, good fun and good family.....o happy day sincerely, tonya
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Sincerely
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5
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574
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Alcoholic Behavior
(Preview)
Hi everyone - the first day of the beginning of my new life is here. I am going to school starting Monday. Two weeks and I will be able to tutor children who are dyslexic. I am really looking forward to this. I knew when I decided to do this, my husband would try to sabotague me. Well, I guess it is my HP throwin...
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Robinks
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9
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623
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Wanting to let go but still find myself holding on a little at times....Trying to understand EXABF's motivation.
(Preview)
This weekend was good and bad, mostly good with a dash of bad sprinkled in:). I was dreding the weekend at first, because Mom's day was yet another day that EXABF and I started a "tradition" and I hated the idea of facing it this year without him. Last year he bought me a new Mt. Bike and he...
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shellyj123
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6
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541
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Mother's day and moving disasters...
(Preview)
So, yesterday I call my mom, and ask for my step father's brother's number because he has a mega truck and can help move me. Before I know it, mom is in her victim mode, about how she & I were working together, how she & I were supposed to collaborate, how she & I, she & I, she & I.... S...
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Tiger2006
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8
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516
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Mother's Day
(Preview)
Happy Mother's Day to all you amazing moms!!!
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Holly09
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1
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545
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Having an Alanon Skype meeting , I realised alcoholism is a WWW pandemic?
(Preview)
Few weeks ago I had an Alanon meeting using Skype. The conference call included people from Sweden, Japan, Australia, Ireland, Thailand, USA. Everyonee was sharing similar things about the disease of alcoholism. To me alcoholism is world wide and is a pandemic with serious consequences for every...
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mia883
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4
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999
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Boundaries... Detachment.
(Preview)
first i want to say there is a fantastic book called "Boundaries" by cloud /townsend you can find it at amazon new or used... or at a local half price books for pretty darn cheap $. :))) it helped me understand My situation better and how to apply boundaries in my relationship...
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aunitedway
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3
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712
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I cannot believe I did this. What was I thinking.
(Preview)
Well kind of a continuation from the other post I posted the other day.... Wasnt sure to start a new topic or continue, but well here I am... I posted about my husbands DUI court case and how he hasnt learned to stop drinking. Well Friday, hmmm he is sitting around all day with that LOOK on his face, the look...
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princessloretta
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4
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891
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Hubby went to court for DUI, ( kinda long, sorry, really need to vent)
(Preview)
Yesterday my hubby went to court for his DUI he got in March. Well first off let me give a short background, I have posted several times on here, but for those who dont know, my husband is a binge drinker and goes months on a dry spell and then slowly starts the cycle again. I have been dealing with this for th...
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princessloretta
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9
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1489
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Stewing in resentment.
(Preview)
I think I've spent my entire life stewing in resentment. Lately I've had to suffer someone in my class who seethes with resentment day and night. He can't bear to see anyone live when he is so unhappy. I don't doubt he's an alcoholic as there are many signs there. I have to say I had no idea how hard it wa...
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maresie
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10
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491
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A's do not understand boundaries
(Preview)
My a-bf and I have been broken up for 2 years and recently started seeing each other again. He's still an A...but I miss him. I decided to set boundaries. One being, our time together would not involve anyone else...ie...family, kids etc. Just us. This means...no sleeping on my couch after an evening o...
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newday
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7
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1060
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My Apologies ...still no idea what you all saw... I was writing in ENGLISH as usual. LOL
(Preview)
Have no idea what you all saw...I wrote in English and could only see English...thank you Tom for reformatting it... I would love to see what you were all seeing! I blame the atmospheric pressure changes between England and the USA...hahaha I have no idea how you saw GREEK? I cannot write Greek and I can...
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Suzannah
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4
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589
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A little about my mom
(Preview)
My mom is very "unique" to me. I don't know if anyone has a similar experience with their moms but I have so much experience with the downside of my relationship with my mom. Unfortunately, sometimes I think she has been less-than what I wanted her to be. I guess in some ways she let me down. ...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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630
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Honesty... Hummmm
(Preview)
Today I have been thinking about some things, some bother me & some I just don't really understand. But my thoughts brought me here about a week ago, and my gut told me one thing, while my heart told me another... Should have went with the gut I suppose... How is it, that you can literally give yoursel...
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Jozie
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7
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792
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Happy Mothers' Day
(Preview)
For all of you mothers young and beyond. If no one has told you they love you because you're special and have been loving and protective...let me be the one. And to my own mother who's spirit continues to grace my mind and memory, Mahalo Nui, Aloha. (((((hugs)))))
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Jerry F
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10
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716
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right choices
(Preview)
at present I am battling with myself to make right choice, to control my own journey and to stop creating situations which are not beneficial. I find that I go through these crazy infatuations where I create a fantasy land. I have to stop myself on this one as reality is where I want to be. I think now becau...
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maire rua
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3
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694
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I wrote my Shrink
(Preview)
Hey you guys I wrote my shrink and TOLD her that this was MY recovery and that things were going to go MY pace..MY comfort and MY needs..... Also re: honoring the male parent....I told her since she threw the bible at me, I told her to read Leviticus 18:29......"EVERYONE who does these detestable t...
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rosielightshines
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3
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583
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LOLOL my shrink denied it and dumped me!!!
(Preview)
Life is never boring I wrote this REAL nice email to my shrink...Told her that this was MY recovery and the focus needed to be on ME and what was best for ME....NO ordering me and adding shame to my pain.... Anyway, she writes back and DENIED telling me to "honor my father"....she DENIED even t...
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rosielightshines
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6
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1489
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Addiction Is Cruel (Just In Case You Didn't Know)............
(Preview)
I received a visit from the son I know and love, he came by to see me this past weekend after he had a falling out with his best friends and his major supplier of drugs. We sat across the kitchen table from each other and drank Coca-Cola and ate cookies (just like when he was little) we laughed and talked abo...
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DreamsOver
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4
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507
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Amazing!
(Preview)
Believe it or not!!! things are going good!! My husband has been home 3 days now and we haven't argued even once. I almost got frustrated last night over something and I stopped myself from going there. I just said to myself.......look, if you go there you will make yourself miserable, so don't go the...
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Sincerely
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4
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705
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The countdown begins
(Preview)
So today I submitted all my letters to the board, to my boss, etc, etc I start packing this weekend Within the next two weeks, I meet with the board. Already questions are being raised about my resignation letter. I pointed out that somet of the activities that go on here are...less than legal. ...
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Tiger2006
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6
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727
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Realising that where-ever I am on my recovery road...I still remain vulernable at times that I least expect it...
(Preview)
Yes, it's true. I work my programme I walk the talk and then my health trips me up and I am vulnerable. Just when I was thinking that that dreadful virus-ridden-flu-infested air caught me out again and I have a raging temperature whilst I shiver 'cos my clothes are sticking to me from a temperature that i...
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Suzannah
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3
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1043
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I dont know best
(Preview)
Hi All My exabf called me the other day. I hadnt heard from him in 10 days. He'd been back to his rehab for a visit and to do service work. Hadnt told anyone he was going just turned off his phone and went. He was full of good news over opportunities that had arisen, its great to hear him doing so well, I really...
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Mariner
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7
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531
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New found clarity today~Feel like a weight was lifted~
(Preview)
Thank all of your for responding to my post yesterday. I received sooo much ESH that I felt completely blessed by it all. Alot of it applied to me and my situation, and after having thought a lot about it the past few days I have really been able to put some clarity on it and it has helped me to feel better...
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shellyj123
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2
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671
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I have to remember.
(Preview)
I am not with him because I love the man I can make him into, I'm with him because I love the man he is now.
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carolinagirl
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3
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518
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Justify apologise defend explain = J A D E =who?
(Preview)
That was my middle name, in fact it became my first name, middle name, and last name...in fact JADE was me...to an iota. ....that is... Until I changed my name and stopped - justifying (my every thought, word and deed) apologising (for the flash floods, the volcano eruptions, the toradoes, for breat...
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Suzannah
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13
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2946
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PHONE LIST/MEMBERS WILLING TO ACCEPT PHONE CALLS
(Preview)
Good Morning all ~ Not sure if this is an appropriate post, but I was wondering if there was a phone list of sorts for this forum? OR if there were any members willing to accept phone calls? Thank you in advance and please advise, if this is not the appropriate place to ask such questions.
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RunnerChick
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6
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886
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I want to leave...
(Preview)
I am so fed up right now. I am so tired of getting angry at my AH (I don't know all the lingo yet). He is actually my AF (alcoholic fiance). I am tired of being ridiculed and manipulated. I am tired of hypocrisy and double standards. I was strong and happy before and during the first 2 years of our relatio...
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mermaid88
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10
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557
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Did Something I Probably Shouldn't Have
(Preview)
My husband has missed his last two Intensive Out Patient Therapy appointments because he's been drunk (sorry, he claims that he's sick). I called the therapist who runs the treatment program and left a voicemail saying that the reason he has missed his last two sessions is because he's drinking aga...
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N8SMOM
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6
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593
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Hiding in the Program
(Preview)
My husband is the greatest Narcissist you would ever meet, complete with a gold medal in the blame game. I have spent most of the last decade trying to figure out if I was the object of his self hate or the dumping ground of his blame. His most recent 3 week binge landed him in rehab. He had spent $3800 on a...
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funnyone
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11
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562
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scared of summer :(
(Preview)
i am a newcomer, just starting out. i am scared of the warm weather!! for the last few years instead of looking forward to summer fun i find myself dreading the Bbq's, the patios, and all of that, because with my A it is tied into drinking opportunities. starting earlier in the day and on into the night.....
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tweety23
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6
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469
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keep and eye open
(Preview)
Someone or thing got past my active security program and messed with my home screen page. I did a reset with the hope that it didn't get past me to you while I was here responding to some post. It's a big sore point for me in the past and now "Only and test...do not reset your radio". ((((hugs)))...
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Jerry F
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0
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472
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Military family - is my DH a funtioning alcoholic?
(Preview)
Hello, I am new here and new to the idea that my husband may be a functioning alcoholic. Mainly, I am trying to figure out if he is or not. Would you mind giving me your opinions? Here's my story in a nutshell: My dh is an officer in the air force. We have been married for 10 years, and we have 2 small child...
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Janne
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5
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3720
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Family Arghhhhhh
(Preview)
Ok Long story ... And Sorry I don't do SHort :) About 2 weeks ago, I got a call from my Neice, "Asisters Daughter" , Telling me I was to get to her House NOW... (she lives 5 mins. away), she is but a drama queen, so I slowed her up and ask what was going on... Well my Lt. Sister, that was suppose to take...
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Jozie
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7
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544
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PROGRAM PRIDE
(Preview)
So here I am, I've gotten through all my steps, and Im done! lol, naw seriously, I will never be done, but there is something about "Done" that tells me I'm better then all those who aren't through them. I know what they need and such to get through it, and it's now more then ever that I need more h...
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cichlid6
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5
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570
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Wanting sooo bad to move forward and feeling so completely stuck~In need of some ESH~
(Preview)
For the most part I am doing well, much better than I have been in a long time, and for that I am grateful, but there is still one very big area that I am struggling with, and I feel that it is preventing me from moving on in my program/life, and that is.... Anger and forgiveness. I am still very angry with EXA...
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shellyj123
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8
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772
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I think I have a bad attitude
(Preview)
Actually, I don't know that I simply THINK I have a bad attitude- I KNOW this. I consider myself a high strug person to begin with, so I'm not sure that the field/job I am in is the correct one for someone who is easily stressed. Most of the time I find my job exhausting. I must manage alot of different thing...
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RunnerChick
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6
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504
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this board ROCKS!!!
(Preview)
i posted a thread. ("tough question") ..i was triggered by my SHRINK...and the AWESOME points i got was totally incredible.....EVERY ONE of you had something soooo valuable for me to contemplate.... I just want to thank ALL of you for helping me.....i SOOO want to heal....I SOOO want to...
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rosielightshines
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8
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527
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3rd step is working
(Preview)
Turning it over to your HP ! Its been working for me all week. I just had the break through where I could not handle the craziness with my son and AH. I turn it over every day I wake up. and it feels like a load off my back. I love it. Like the 3 C i remind myself of them daily when the feeling starts to build with my c...
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peacewithin
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4
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430
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I have a REAL tough question
(Preview)
Hi guys as you know i am in therapy and this therapist TOLD me i had to "honor thy father and thy mother".. my father never ever made amends for sexually abusing me my entire teen years...he died, thinking he was "ok" with everything.....he was a sociopath.....never felt sorrow...
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rosielightshines
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30
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694
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Am I awful for being on the edge of giving up?
(Preview)
I feel so beaten down, defeated. No matter what I do or say I'm wrong. I'm trying to not put myself in positions to argue with my A-bf, who is a dry drunk. I'm never sure who I'm going to talk to. One day he tells me to deal with my problems b/c they are mine and then when he calls and I tell him I need some sp...
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lizzakiss
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8
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1536
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Why I Am Grateful to AlAnon
(Preview)
Good Morning to mu MIP Family, Today is the 2nd Anniversary of my son's passing. He relapsed after 12 years of soberity and could/would not recover. The last two years of his life I lived with him in his home and did all I could to keep the focus on myself while letting the disease run its coarse. I alwa...
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hotrod
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10
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1928
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Rejoycing in Expectations
(Preview)
Hi there MIP family I have always tried to work in my expectations of life, but mostly family..lol... When I would visit my "Now Deseased" Afather I would say a little chant, kinda like my own little serenity prayer before I knew it existed...lol.. and it was "Ok when I get to Adad's I wi...
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Jozie
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7
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479
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When will he give up on this pointless contact
(Preview)
Messages are coming from a new angle now...and the problem is I dont get chance to build or re-group, before he does something to upset me again. Just any contact gets to me. My sis wasnt sure what to do with this, poor thing, they always drag everyone into it. I just heard Lilly has not been well. I know she...
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Lilly Burn
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13
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643
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Reminding me that I matter...and much more to the point...YOU ALL MATTER to me :-D x
(Preview)
Hello my dear family, it is a while since I checked in here. Some of you will not know me at all, some of you will remember me as the new 'gal' on the block and some of you might even have missed me. To one and all, I say, it's good to be back in the embrace of the family. I have had sooooooooo much stuff going on......
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Suzannah
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11
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565
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Survey Question for my MIP family...
(Preview)
I went to my first AlAnon meeting when I was married to abusive/Active/dry drunk EXAH-I never went back, why I'm not sure but I think because I wanted a quick fix for EXAH that I didn't get. My second meeting,about a year later, was after he and I split up-I never went back-I figured no A=No problem-I di...
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shellyj123
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12
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549
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Getting love....Being Loving.....WHICH????
(Preview)
### ROSIE NOTE_______I was so needy the "getting love" was my thing....after disappointment after disappointment, i decided, "why not love myself??? love my HP???? and let the rest take care of it self, by SHARING me with others????"....this is changing me from being so nee...
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rosielightshines
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3
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486
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I absolutely LOVE my sponsor, and my HP never ceases to amaze me!
(Preview)
Had a moment of weakness yesterday and of course I ran to my sponsor with my tail placed firmly between my legs:) My sponsor thinks a lot of times that she causes me pain and hurt at times by her responses, and sometimes they do sting. NOT because of WHAT she says or HOW she says it but because she is rig...
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shellyj123
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4
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456
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Thinking of You All.....
(Preview)
I come and visit here every chance I get, reading all our situations, which are all different but so painfully the same, I think about you all during the day and how brave, caring you are. The energy it takes to function in the environment that we find ourselves in, the love it takes to "walk the line...
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DreamsOver
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4
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690
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I have nothing more emotionally I can give to daughter
(Preview)
We went to Houston for grandaughter's first communion. Was a great celebration. I did not tell AD that we were going; eventhough it was on her birthday. I cannot be in two places at one time and we felt it was much more important to be for the first commuion celebration. And yes, it was precious!!!! I...
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clara
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8
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1066
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