The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today is the 2nd Anniversary of my son's passing. He relapsed after 12 years of soberity and could/would not recover. The last two years of his life I lived with him in his home and did all I could to keep the focus on myself while letting the disease run its coarse. I always thought he could recover and if I just detached, did my thing and allowed him the freedom to do what he needed to do he would turn around. The last year it became painfully real that he was not going to make it. My acceptance of this situation was vey painful but once I reached that acceptance, I was able to love the person and not interact with the disease. He passed away in his sleep 5-6-07. Today I spent my day reviewing all my old family photos and found al the happy memories that were captured thru the years. I will always be eternally grateful to alanon for the tools to accept what I cannot change and the courage to change what I can (me) and the wisdom to know the difference.
I am grateful to alanon for the tools to live life on life's terms and to have been there when all I wanted to do was run. Since his passing I have been upheld by this program and know somehow I must give back that which was given to me Thank you all so much for your sharing and for the hope and inspiration I receive daily.
Peace
-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 6th of May 2009 02:43:39 PM
Hello Hotrod, Thanks for sharing your feeling with us. thanks for being so corageous and telling us how you feel. I'm so sorry for your loss. I know that you're hurting. I love you.
That you survived and continued on to help others along the way to recovery inspite of the disease and the life it took is the miracle. I have always been sooooo deeply affected by the membership who has not walked away in defeat but stayed to recover and lend a hand to others who needed help. Your participation gives me confidence that I will never have to be alone in this or any other trial in my life and for that I am exceptionally grateful.
Mahalo Nui means "Thanks Much". I for one am glad that you did not leave the space your son occupied in your heart empty.
Hotrod, your elegant, simple, direct words have been a highlight of MIP since you came on the scene here. I, for one, am so grateful for what you bring to us here in so many ways. Your presence helps to make MIP such an important and special place for all of us.
I ran away so many times I lost count. I could not imagine sticking through it like you did. You are a very real inspiration to me and I am honored to hear your story and grateful you brought it forward. Hugs, J.
I love you :) you have been such a blessing in my life, your ESH, your courage, your strength is one that can be admired by many, and i'm sure is!! I know you have given me more then anyone could ask for your truthfulness, your honesty, your Explaining things to me, so that even I can get them and learn from them...
I hold you dear to my heart and look up to you for all that you do... Thank you so much for being a part of this board and taking the time out of your life and sharing your ESH with all of us, Keep taking care of you, and I am sure that your son is in heaven, very thankful for his time with you on this earth as well as in your heart...You are a beautiful person, and I pray for you often :)
Very sorry for your loss Betty, but what an awesome testimony about the power and value of Al-Anon and our tools of recovery.... All I can say is "wow"....
Tom
__________________
"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
