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Should I? Or Should I Not?
(Preview)
I had posted this... and I apologize if this is a duplicate post, but it seems the original got deleted... I think i somehow did it by accident) Original Post: Hello Folks :) I'd like a bit of input... I'm still very new to Al-Anon, but am trying to get a better understanding of what to do and not to do regard...
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GlitterGirl
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8
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676
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just sick
(Preview)
i thought my life was unmanageable already but last night i was really, truly and finally defeated. i don't even want to go into details, it's just more of the same drama with AH. i just can't bear the pain any more. last night i prayed, "i don't know who i'm talking to but you've got to help me. i c...
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xter
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7
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801
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Enough
(Preview)
I am enough. Just for today I will do the best I can and make the most of what I get. I will be optimistic and hopeful. I will not dwell on yesterday but do the best I can today. I am not perfect but I am enough. It's been a crazy week for me. I've been working all week and will not be getting a break. But, like someo...
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christinajeanne
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4
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840
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Sticking with the Winners
(Preview)
I working my steps and am floundering about trying to reach out and connect with others. I'm trying to process things and deal with them in a RECOVERY way and this board feels SAFE for me to do so. The phone feels like 1000 lbs - TRULY.
I find myself gravitating towards newcomers or those who have simili...
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RunnerChick
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6
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669
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The Disease (A poem I wote)
(Preview)
When I first came into the program. My first meeting i was givin a assingment by the wonderfull sponser i still have.. I as surpossed to draw a picture of how i was the disease and then write about it.. So I wrote this poem.. The Disease The disappointment and broken promises.. Hopes and dreams scattered...
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teddybearpoet
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3
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776
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Feeling sad and down
(Preview)
Today I met a student I had taught who had become a friend and who was very supportive last year when step mom A was diagnosed with an incurable brain tumour, she died in November 08. Her daughter has just been diagnosed with a very malignant melanoma and when I met her and her three friends they had opened...
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maire rua
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2
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511
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Active A is really sick
(Preview)
Not from alcoholism, but from a neurological condition that contributed to the depression that contributed to the alcoholism. We have had such a long and eduring marraige and I have changed so much. I finally realized that I can make do without him and his problems, and that his being sick doesn't j...
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RainyJamie
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7
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932
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sponsorship (feelings of fear)
(Preview)
Hi everyone I am feeling pretty fearful at the moment about asking someone I have had in mind from the moment I met them to be my sponsor. I'm almost certain this person would be ideal as she has qualities I would like to gain myself and I feel has tackled the steps thoroughly from what I have listened to in...
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chezza
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4
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558
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A positive update
(Preview)
How about a positive update for a change???? Seems like so many times updates can be filled with sad news - I guess maybe it depends on perspective - hmm perspective or attitude - it appears that is one of the many lessons that I have learned in recovery . . . the majority of my battle is with my perspective a...
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Rita G
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5
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769
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Progress not perfection
(Preview)
There are sometimes I want to blot out all memories of the ex A. I am working on decluttering and I veer between wanting to pitch a lot of stuff to being obessive about where the stuff I don't want should go. I know it will be a process. Obviously our two dogs are one bit product of the relationship and I'm...
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maresie
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2
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796
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Dating confusion.....Any ESH would be appreciated
(Preview)
I woke up this am and found myself again thinking about EXABF-UGHHH!!!!. There has been much progress made-he used to consume every waking thought and moment from the time my eyes opened, now though I think about him it is in fleeting moments, usually remembering a time we shared last Summer or wonde...
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shellyj123
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6
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790
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Courage needed today
(Preview)
Our local constabulary (police) kindly brought our A son home drunk and incapable....so much for sleeping it off!! (see my last post) Had I been in the vicinity...it was husb that took delivery of him....I would not have allowed him in the house but would have let the police put him in the cells for the...
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Ness
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7
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730
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My daughter visited in june!
(Preview)
Many of you already know that my daughter and I were separated at birth, and that I have recently met her after 40+ years. She flew to San Antonio to visit with me, and wouldnt you know...Alcoholic companion took that opportunity to binge. Of course he knew how important this meeting was to me, and I b...
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Diva
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7
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773
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Once in a lifetime
(Preview)
Today at 5 minutes and 6 seconds after 4 it will be 04:05:06 07/08/09 This will never happen again in our lifetime. Kewl..........
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Mobirdie
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0
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397
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Checking A's email or texts??????????
(Preview)
Should I consider reading my A's email and/or text messages to confirm whether he is lying or not? I have always believed him 100% until some recent incidents where I was told he was lying to me (and he was). Even in the face of "hard" evidence he will not admit to anything (except when he is dru...
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Bella333
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15
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871
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Alcoholic seems very detached from ME
(Preview)
I have noticed that my active alcoholic ex-boyfriend (we have stayed close after breaking up two years ago and we have talked about maybe getting back together which would lead to marriage) is acting very detached from ME! He still stays in contact with me and we play tennis etc. but has been reconne...
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Bella333
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5
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1166
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Just wanted to share some good news...
(Preview)
It truly is amazing when I leave things to God, and just do the next right thing. I started volunteering this summer in the medical records department at my small local hospital to get some hands-on experience for my upcoming degree (associate of applied science in medical information technology...
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Tenderheartsks
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13
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757
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I apologise
(Preview)
I have been here many years. We used to have a member post from ODAT every day. I missed that so I asked Overcome, aka Java to post it again. John was here a lot then so I did not think twice about it not being appropriate. It is possible we did have persmission so I am going to look into it. I am sorry about any mi...
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debilyn
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1
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462
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Help Detaching Please
(Preview)
My son and I are on vacation visiting my family. We are having a great time until my husband called me yesterday to tell me that he was in a car accident on his way to work. I guess I should be thankful alcohol wasn't involved (but will admit that was my FIRST thought). Now we don't have a 2nd vehicle becau...
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N8SMOM
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7
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932
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Reclaiming ME!
(Preview)
Im grateful to this board, to all of you for sharing your ES&H...thank you.When I found MIP one dark day in January it started me on the path to recovery. Im a slow work in progress, building my Strength which sustains my Hope because my Experience of alcoholism took me to the end of my rope. I am sti...
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Ness
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4
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592
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Daily readings from copyrighted literature
(closed)
(Preview)
It was pointed out to me by two other moderators of this room that my posting of the daily literature ODAAT in Al-Anon, is copyrighted literature. This is not allowed by WSO and it states in the Al-anon/Alateen service manual that "The WSO does not grant permisison for substantial reprints of C...
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Overcome
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2
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2284
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Spiritual awakening/Forgivness
(Preview)
Hi.. Im Cathy.. A couple of weeks ago i had something happen that I have not shared with many.. Cause i did not want people to think i was crazy.. Those I have shared it with though says they thought it was a spiratial awakening and then my sponser last night said she though it was also forgivness.. It start...
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teddybearpoet
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3
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1343
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July 7th reading from One Day At A Time in Al-Anon
(Preview)
What's so important about being right? Why do we complicate our lives and aggravate our difficulties by insisting our views be accepted? (this share is found in the daily reader) -- Edited by tea2 on Wednesday 8th of July 2009 09:19:54 PM
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Overcome
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8
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3271
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update!
(Preview)
hi all, just wanted to update you guys. I hope all of you are doing good. Well, as some of you know I have been on a cleaning and decluttering spree for days now. It has been good for my soul!!! It's been my own way of moving forward. Like most of you all on here, I too do not want to have to make a decision on th...
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beacheemom
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2
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576
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Realtionships in General
(Preview)
As a codependent I am finding that my relationship insecurity is not just with As but with men in general. I am desperately lonely and so self-destructive when it comes to dating that my fears of always being alone just get reinforced. I know I am supposed to love myself, etc. But, honestly, I just WA...
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Codependent
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8
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989
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uncertainty but taking it a day at a time
(Preview)
Dear All. As some of you know my job fell through for the summer because of an embargo on hiring. I took it well though I have two people in my employment who I have kept on as we are doing sterling work on the house. I have about four years of clutter to clear up and we are getting through this slowly but surely...
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maire rua
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2
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474
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Just Got Engaged and He's Probably an Alcoholic: What Do I Do?
(Preview)
I have always been fairly careful with marriage but after four years of knowing each other (but I lived in another state) and one year of dating, I said yes to my fiance's proposal. I have just decided this is a man I can give my heart to but now am starting to wonder if he is an alcoholic. Since he started d...
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AliAlAnon
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10
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2353
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A Parable by a Sponsor
(Preview)
Hi ((((Family)))) I read this yesterday and thought it was just a great visual for me to hold in my mind of why I need to keep coming back. I wanted to share it with you all. A Parable by a Sponsor A member of the program of recovery, who previously had been attending meetings regularly, stopped going. A...
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david62
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11
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1079
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A lost soul
(Preview)
As many of you know I've been going through a divorce, my 4th. I have had a tendency in the past to go from one relationship to another, to another, to another. Well, you get the picture. Recently I was fooling myself that a "friend" of mine from Texas was just a "friend" when in actu...
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Overcome
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5
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785
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An Attitude Adjustment..with a pinch of humor
(Preview)
Hi ((((Family)))) I got another dose of my HP's sense of humor this week so I thought I would share it with you. I was sitting at work Monday, minding my own business, doing my job when my supervisor came in to my office and had a strange look on his face...one that said he has some news and he didn't think I wa...
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david62
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8
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602
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Husband attacks me on Facebook
(Preview)
Boy am I a gluten for punishment or what. After blocking husband's email, I get a request to be his friend on facebook. I hover over the accept or deline button. My curiousity gets the better of me and I hit "accept". I post on his wall that I need to get in touch with him for the finalizing of the d...
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Overcome
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14
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685
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I'm my worse enemy!
(Preview)
Okay............ this time i can't blame it on PMS. hormones are no excuse in this behavior. i have been angry and crappy. i can't stand to even be around my own self anymore. and when i get like this, the program and my faith are the last thing on my mind. i know what i gotta do, i have the tools and i'm c...
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Sincerely
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4
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583
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He stopped drinking, but for how long?
(Preview)
Things are changing. My AH has decided to stop drinking and I am happy about that but life as we have known it, for years now, is changing. For the better but still changing. I don't know what to expect tonight when he gets home from work. I am apprehensive, excited and scared. I am so used to life being a cer...
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wildthang86
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3
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750
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Adaughter and the 4th of July week end---update
(Preview)
Well, I took the dive off the deep end and invited daughter out to have a family holiday celebration. She was so excited and said she would come. Then on Friday, she called and said she could make it because she was having trouble with her truck. I asked her what was wrong and her reply "I am not a m...
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clara
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3
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705
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Am I in trouble?
(Preview)
This is my first visit to this site, and I have a feeling I'm at the right place, but perhaps the reason I'm here is "denial?" All I can say is that I'm afraid my husband may be an alcoholic, and after thorough research into the subject, I'm very afraid for him and for me. Perhaps I need for some o...
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Mystique2009
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8
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830
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i need help
(Preview)
iv got a big problem, my daugther has bin on a binge for a wk, she has just text me an said she want to die. what do i do? just cant do this on my own
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mary j
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12
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565
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Why I come back...
(Preview)
Debilyn your comment touched me. I just wanted all of you to know that through it all why I come back is because I know that here I have a safe place to say the same things over and over, make the same mistakes over and over, and be welcomed with love, support, acceptance, not judgement, but also with a remi...
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Codependent
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5
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739
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Weekend recovery...
(Preview)
Got to lots of meetings this weekend. And lots of contact. Feel like I am swimming and or floating in recovery. Made me realize that I need a lot more meetings in every single 7 day stretch. Come hell or high water or holidays or traffic. And I've very grateful for the people on this board for their sha...
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MrsGratitude
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1
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423
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July 6 reading from One Day At A Time in Al-Anon
(Preview)
(this may be found in the daily reader) -- Edited by tea2 on Wednesday 8th of July 2009 09:50:23 PM
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Overcome
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2
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491
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July 5th reading for One Day at a Time in Al-Anon
(Preview)
An AA speaker at al Al-Anon meeting gave the members this unusual insight from the other side of the fence: "The non-alcohoilc in the family doesn't seem to realize that the alcoholic is in a terribly vulnerable position. He must be constantly on guard, because he knows, deep down inside, how mu...
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Overcome
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3
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904
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took a geographical this weekend...
(Preview)
i took a little trip to get away from AH and the insanity for a few days. day one was fantastic. day 2, less so. i was anxious and kept thinking how happy HE must be that i'm not there, how he's probably LOVING being without me for a few days. trying SO hard not to attempt to get into his head but... days 3-5...
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xter
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1
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664
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Happiness is an inside job...
(Preview)
I need some ESH on this topic. I can fully understand how taking care of ME will find me happiness - happiness that is right for ME. I understand how my choices and decisions need to reflect and be consistent with the consequences and outcomes that I want in my life. Where I struggle is in understanding th...
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Rora
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11
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783
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how do you find Peace?
(Preview)
feeling like im fighting myself - havent been able to get out/get away by myself as i dont have my license (hopefully very soon) Boyfriend smokes to find his peace, also his religion. His smoking takes away any peace I may have at the moment How do you find your peace AND keep it? walking? nature? open to a...
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florida
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7
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946
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I don't want to go....but that means I really need to!
(Preview)
LAZY! I would rather procrastinate than go to my meeting- sleep in, be lazy, surf the web, etc. But that is always a clue that I need to get my butt in gear and get to a meeting. I did not go last week for the very same reason. Geez, what a battle it is sometimes with my own self! UGH! But, Ok, I am going, I g...
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Jean4444
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11
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883
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the disease thing
(Preview)
I've been thinking about the disease of alcoholism and trying to get my head around it more. I don't bristle as much when I call it a disease any longer BUT here's my issue. I'd love all of your ESH on it: If a diabetic eats candy bars and doesn't take his insulin (fully knowing that this is not good self care...
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gknee
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7
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940
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Been wanting to hide out
(Preview)
Ok.. I have been avoiding posting since i have been back in the room.. Have had a couple of people saying I should.. So here I am.. When i first came into this program.. I thought my biggest challenge was to learn how to live with alcoholism.. I knew I had alot of issues as well and knew there would be challe...
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teddybearpoet
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4
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700
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daughter teenager today
(Preview)
Hi, my daughter turns 13 today. I have promised her 4 her 16 we will visit america because her birthday is special in your country any ideas. Plus I plan to attend a convention next year with my AB if he is still sober want to go somewhere special all ideas appreciated. Hope you all have a lovely 4th July c...
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Tracy
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2
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487
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I'm expecting a miracle:)or should I say another one?:)
(Preview)
Went to bed feeling like I was truly blessed and woke up feeling the same. It's been two WHOLE weeks since I FINALLY reached the point of all out insanity and had to walk away from someone that I love, one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life. I walked away to save myself.....someone that I d...
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shellyj123
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5
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660
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Scared of myself
(Preview)
Thanks for all of the support. I have been doing a lot of introspection and once again wind up scared of my weaknesses- scared that I haven't made as much progress as I wanted to. I still have my alcohol issues that I have not let go of. I still have intimacy and sex issues and loneliness and lack of trust...
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Codependent
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7
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621
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Sanity check
(Preview)
Hi all.God- I hate 3 day holiday weekends!!! AH gets in a mood and it just keeps on giving. Here's the scenario today. AH leaves the house around 4- drops 16 y/o at work and then disappears. I hang out for a while , then head to grocery store to prep for planned picnics tomorrow (which I am beginning to beli...
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gknee
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6
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731
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Gratitude
(Preview)
Here's something positive:If I hadn't been working my program and just getting on with my day--despite what my AH was doing- this is what I would have missed out on:1) a 3 mile run2) a 4th of july parade with my kids and some old friends3) a visit with some former neighbors4) a wonderful picnic at my aunt...
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gknee
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4
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610
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Had to Laugh
(Preview)
I took a Service Position recently at my Saturday meeting. My job is to call the person who is chairing the meeting the night before to remind them. Well, my job started this month and I happen to be out of town - but I made sure to send myself an e-mail to remind me to call the people (one of them is the regul...
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N8SMOM
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2
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691
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What Do You Do When You Start To Lose Your Faith?
(Preview)
I have always had my faith to sustain me. I had it during the illness and death of both of my parents to whom I had a very close, loving relationships, during the diagnosis that my youngest son was Autistic, and when I suffered a severe case of depression, it has sustained me living with my oldest so...
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DreamsOver
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10
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968
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July 4th reading from One Day at a Time in Al-Anon
(Preview)
(this share can be found in the daily reader) -- Edited by tea2 on Wednesday 8th of July 2009 09:29:06 PM
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Overcome
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1
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498
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so sad
(Preview)
this is my first posting so sorry for any mistakes. i am trying to detach from my daughter cos i know after months trying i cannot help her. she's on another binge now and this is when i panic cos she often tells her friends she has taken an overdose cos she no longer wants to live, they panic an ring me, an...
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mary j
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11
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868
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Independance Day
(Preview)
For the first time in ages, I feel like I am slowly finding my way back to my independant, self sufficient, happy, and confident self. The journey has been long and rough at times, and it continues and will continue forever, and I am happy and looking forward to each and every day of it. I've finally allo...
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shellyj123
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0
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317
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Wondering at my need to be right
(Preview)
I can see it when it's happening. I know it's futile to argue, but there are times when it seems I just can't help it. And it's over the dumbest stuff. Usually because the topic of conversation shifts and my AH doesn't bother to tell me, then starts talking down to me when I express confusion and atte...
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blender_girl
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9
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387
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No longer with AH but still suffering
(Preview)
I wanted to share my story for some thoughts and experiences you all went through. I am no longer living with my AH and we are divorced a year ago...I know i dont want to get back to him and our marriage has made me discover so many deffects of character which i need to work on to be a healthier and happier pers...
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koukou
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8
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962
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Happy 4th of July!
(Preview)
(((((Family))))), A quick HAPPY 4th of JULY to all! Have a wonderful weekend. Celebrate the meaning of this day. I am so proud to be an American. To my military families thank you for doing what you do. Come home safe and sound to us. I am off to work for the entire weekend, but that's okay. I have lot...
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Karilynn
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0
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283
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Thanks To All That Travel Along Side......
(Preview)
I appreciate every response to my question. There is a lot of love and wisdom here.
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DreamsOver
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2
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640
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