A waste of energy so STOP, regroup, and redirect that energy into a positive action in my own recovery programme. - Al-Anon Family Group

Suzannah · ~*Service Worker*~

A waste of energy so STOP, regroup, and redirect that energy into a positive action in my own recovery programme.

david62 · ~*Service Worker*~

Well said my friend. I do waaayyyy too much thinking too sometimes.

Have a great day!

David

glad lee · ~*Service Worker*~

"Be the change you want to see in the world." (Ghandi)

That little quote helps me to stay in my own little circle of recovery, on my side of the street.

I know it's a program of attraction, not promotion. In early recovery, I couldn't stop promoting it, the program was such a powerful answer for me. I began to feel I was becoming a turn-off instead. Today, I can understand that it was just me trying to control the world again. (sigh)

Miraculously, it was HP who brought me into the rooms of al-anon. That is the most perfect way. If anyone EVER happens to glean anything from me or my recovery.... that is HP's doing, not mine. I am powerless.

Thanks for the reminders (((Suzannah)))

Ness · ~*Service Worker*~

Suzannah wrote:

I just do not like to see waste...and a waste of a life most of all.

The fact that they CHOSE NOT to better themselves, make the effort, change bad habits and rehabilitate themselves so that I CAN ENJOY THEIR COMPANY is not a healthy options, not a choice that I can influence no matter how much I try to MAKE IT HAPPEN.

I can talk myself hoarse, I can wear myself into the ground, I can turn myself inside out, I can feel let down, and can wonder why the other person does not get it or I can -

START WITH ME - again - and redirect all that energy into positive action for me.

Speaking as a Mother, I have had a 5 year + difficult struggle in detaching from my son's disease and did all of the above over and over again
In the last few months I have learned to let go, with love, and began work on me.
His disease is active again....I am maintaining the boundaries that were set during his 'dry period'
The only person I can save here is ME.

Thanks Suzannah

(((hugs))) Ness

RunnerChick · Senior Member

Thank you so much for sharing this!!!
I can so incredibly relate. This frustration that others can't make the changes we wish they would to accomodate us and our time frames for them in OUR lives.
This idea of not being able to be free from the sadness of others not meeting us half way or living up to all that we see in them.
Thank you again for sharing - truly good stuff here!!

gknee · Senior Member

Amen to that!

I see my program as an invisible shield that I build to deflect the outside world-- especially those who are caught up in negativity and want to suck me into that vortex. Working my program strengthens the forcefield-- especially the work i do during the easy times. It is hard to learn those skills during a crisis.
Of course-- I need to be reminded of this regularly-- I am lazy and I like to forget about the bad times. Procrastination is one of my big character defects in general (and it certainly applies to program as well)
I know that being a "rainy day" alanoner never gets me all the miracles of a full program.

-- Edited by gknee on Thursday 9th of July 2009 01:51:13 PM

maresie · ~*Service Worker*~

I believe I spent a lot of energy focusing on others because it was too painful to focus on myself.

Maresie.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.