Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

debilyn · debilyn

Most people here know I am a JW. Another person who considers themself a JW came down on me about some things I share here. I wanted to make it clear that I am here because I need to be here. Loving A's in my life is part of me. I learned to feel comfortable with that and make sure the pits of the disease no longer...

Jozie · Jozie

Just wanted to update and say sorry I haven't been of much help here of late, been very busy in some things and very annoyed in others... Abrother now has the family in an up roar again, and I have backed out slowly but my Mom is still the Whip'n Post for everyone else. I am trying to deal with those feelings a...

nmike · nmike

My AHsober said that he had put in a bid on a house. Although, he says he wants a divorce we are still legally married. I told him that he can't do that. And if he does he will have to sell it when we divorce. He got really angry and hung up the phone. He has always been a good provider for our family. Every few yea...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

My husband seems to be slacking on the basic maintenance of our pool these days. The pool has always been his responsibility for as long as we've been together. We live in Arizona and it's really hot now, so the pool needs extra attention. Do I figure out how to do those things and start taking care of...

Holly09 · Holly09

I just wanted to share something nice for a change.....we had a terrific weekend! Took the kids to Storyland on Friday and just hung out the rest of the weekend. My A boyfriend did not drink at all which is strange. I'm not sure why he didn't but then we don't understand why they do anything they do. Al...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I posted a few days ago about my sister overdosing once again. To help make this clear I'll call the sister that overdosed sister #1 and the other sister #2. Yesterday sister #1's doctor asked to meet with the family today so my mother, sister #2, my brother and myself went over there. We sat for over a...

Gailey · Gailey

and how his bottom was his death. A son went to a MVA hearing today for his dui. His lawyer told him to bring someone with him as he would probably not be able to drive home after the hearing. The other day he called and made an appointment to have one of those things you blow into installed on his car. The appo...

Jozie · Jozie

I swear, I don't know why we even have a system.. I mean honestly...My Abrother has been arrested EVERY YEAR for the last 12 years, "His 1st DWI was when he was 18" he will be 30 this Fri. Now all this crap started because He DID NOT show up at court, so they call the ones that bailed him out "...

Searching for Peace · Searching for Peace

Hello, I am 48 yrs old, married 20yrs with 15yr boy/girl twins. For the last year our life has been a mess. My spouse is drinker and verbal abuser. His drinking and abuse has gotten worse over the years, last year things esclated to the point he moved out, in, out and in. I have been to counseling (alo...

Loveridden · Loveridden

Was just reading lots of posts and got to thinking.... Everyone keeps saying this is a disease, I liked the post that compared it to a mental disease - comparing it to a physical disease - I can see that straining my logic... A mental disorder can make ppl hate you, fear you, resent you, try to correct...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

My ex used to have this cloth like bracelet he wore all the time that simply had the word THINK on it.....I would love to find one for myself as I could use the constant reminder but haven't been able to locate any online and will not call and ask where he got his... Does anyone know where I can find one of thes...

inhisarms · inhisarms

Hi all, been awhile since i have posted, but i still come here every morning to get my daily dose of love, support and esh... Lived through hell of living with my fiance for years, finally got to a point where it was me dying slowly or him. Told him to leave, dug into alanon and started a new life for me and my...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Most of the time I try to live one day at a time! But lately I have been noticing that I look forward to the future a little more! It is kinda funny when you consider that I used to really look forward to dying & that I would definitely been in a better place than this "crappy" world! Today is...

barisax · barisax

Someone I care a great deal about is getting ready to do something I would normally advise against... she's going to marry an alcoholic... me!! I was married before. 5 years drinking, then 5 years sober. Then 15 years sober and single, over 12 without being in any kind of real relationship. We've b...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I have spent the majority of my life trying to protect the addicts/alcoholics in my family from themselves. I thank my higher power every night for this program for without it I hate to think where I would be right now. My sister has a long history of alcohol and prescription drug abuse. I have lost cou...

hanila · hanila

Previously, I posted my experience with my "boyfriend" and how he's treated me in our relationship. He is an alcoholic. I don't know if these are actions caused by the alcoholism or not. To review my story, I had mentioned that he was critical of me or makes side comments about how I'm t...

kinsey · kinsey

I've never done or experienced anything like this before and I need help. My husband and I just got married about 3 weeks ago. We've always been long distance, and I'm at my home wrapping things up and packing before I make a permanent move to his home in Missouri in about another month. I just got off the p...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello and Hugs, I love days like today. HP knew what he was doing when he woke me up before 9am this morning. I didn't have any plans, but wasn't wanting to wake up that early on my only day off. Anyways, trying to get healty I went to the grocery store and got some healty food. Washed ALL my clothes (too...

Melissa21 · Melissa21

I use java and for some reason when I click to enter chat it doesn't load at all. Never had this problem before. I've cleared cookies and all that and it still isn't working. What do I do? I see the little java icon down by the time on the destop.... Never mind got it to work now! -- Edited by Melissa21 on Sunda...

xter · xter

i am hoping to have a good week this week. i'm hoping to keep not-smoking (one day at a time with that) and try to fit in some exercise. i'm wondering where my husband is right now, but am going to turn it over to my HP before i go to sleep. love and hope and peace to all of you , -xter

Inpain · Inpain

I've faced a LOT of pain in the last 7 months. Coming to terms with the fact that my husband had an affair and is an alcoholic is overwhelming most days. I had never known the depths of depression until this time. I have done a LOT of soul searching. I realize I have a very hard time facing my own emotion...

billileli1 · billileli1

today I ws so scared of my roommate that I didn't come out of my room.

janmarie · janmarie

Hi, I am pretty new here. And I have been in the chat room and at some of the meetings. I have met some wonderful people and they have giving me some great advice. But how to you do it. I mean the advice you get. Here is a little history of my situation. Right now my husband is serving 88 days in county jail for h...

Ness · Ness

On Thursday night I packed a small rucksack with a change of clothes, a towel, toiletries, mobile phone and charger, a copy of courage to change and a copy of this....... which was posted on MIP this last week..... A Cherokee fable: One evening, a grandfather was teaching his young grandson about the...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

feel the need to defend myself? I hate that about myself! I am people pleasing, stupid, weak knee, ninny. I want to get past the point of being back on my heels, I was raised to not to confront, to keep things to yourself, no one wants to hear you complain. All the above I have taken with me through my life...

Lanchas · Lanchas

The teen board needs help. Teens are posting there again but there's no support for them. People need to reply to their posts and be there for them. I'm trying to do better again tho I don't always succeed. Lanchas

danz123 · danz123

Because of the holiday weekend we are postponing the business meeting. We will meet on Sunday July 12th at 9pm est. Please pm me if you have any agenda items. Happy 4th of July . hugs, danz

Loveridden · Loveridden

Going through my one day at a time in al anon book - I came across an entry that talks about blame and resentment. I will not post the entry here because I see that would be copyright infringement, but I would like to discuss it. My alcoholic boyfriend likes to blame EVERYTHING on me......everything an...

Lotus · Lotus

I have a few questions, but I'll explain the situation first. My husband and I have been married almost 4 years, and have a very young son. He was an alcoholic when we married, and because of his violent temper, I had to demand that he keep his drinking under control (he wouldn't stop) but he worked his way...

Eve55 · Eve55

Hello, I'm new here. I'm new to all of this in fact. I've only been to one meeting a few weeks ago to see if it "made sense" to me. Unfortunately I am finding that it did. So here my question. I heard about Detachment and I have tried to read about it some on the web. I've been reading the some of...

Melissa21 · Melissa21

Update from last post where A told me he is going to inpatient treatment and will need a new liver. I think when I posted I was just really scared and angry with him. I didn't know what to think. Maybe that was it I didn't THINK at all. I just started worrying and much of what I have learned hear sort of slipped...

billileli1 · billileli1

Hello. Billi here, and I have a dysfunctional housemate. I realize he doesn't have a drinking problem, but I suffer from the same kind of problem that an "AlAnon" might. He is depressed and won't go to therapy. I am watching him slowly die right now of depression. I cant' afford to move out,...

CAM0914 · CAM0914

I am just amazed at where my mind goes sometimes...the fear and anxiety that I actually manufacture on my own self! Gotta let go - let my HP take care of things, it's always the same answer.... Serenity is the goal, right? One day at a time! Best to everyone - Christine

Jerry F · Jerry F

look elsewhere. Aloha Family. I was feeling a bit over weight in the mental, emotional and spiritual self and stopped what I was doing for a minute to look at why. It only takes a minute now LOL. What I found out was that I wasn't asking my self the "what is my part in the situation first". ...

debilyn · debilyn

Went down to the horses to check water and give scritchees. Picked up the piece of flat messed up hose that "somebody" Left acrossed the road all two weeks.... As I walked back one of those garden truck things, not very tall six wheels with a bed in back to put stuff in was coming. I went in my ga...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

For some reason yesterday and today-especially today, I am consumed with the urge to snoop on EXABF's myspace page. I have no idea why, or where it came from. Perhaps it is my being sick and wanting what used to be comfort. Or an obsession- just wanting to know what/who he is doing. I don't know wher...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), This is pretty cool. Precisely at 12:34:56 today we will have a complete number sequence of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 because today is 7/8 and the year is 2009! It happened earlier this morning too but I missed it. I had no idea until I heard it on the news. Neat stuff. Enjoy your day. Love and bl...

Rora · Rora

When I examine my behaviour towards my aH from whom I am separated I have realized that for the past several years, even while we were still together, I have this very annoying habit of trying to convince him what a jerk he is. It drives him crazy as you can imagine and actually it's pretty irritating for m...

Jeanne · Jeanne

I guess, I just need to dump a little. My son who is 28 years old had two wonderful years being clean (he had two years before too) and sober, but now he has no desire to be clean *because* he has a great job, girlfriend and life is going *great.* He has short term memory of the days he slept on a park bench or...

Tracy · Tracy

Wow once they get sober you realise how much you need to change even more so. I have been very resebtful and angrey, suffering the poor me's. Wanting everything to get better overnight now he is sober ( only been 2-3 months). I went to my f2f the subject was expectations and I realised to my shame that It...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Taking care of me--taking naps when I need them! I am again struggling with sleep but it is getting better all the time! I guess that is a Beatles song! It's getting better all the time, better better so much better! I am focusing on myself a little better, too. I am not going to let others bring me down a...

mary j · mary j

Im pleased with the way MOST things have gone this wk. Iv tried hard to look after ME with the help of my HP. last Saturday when my AD told me she was going to end her life i asked you all for help, and with your help i got through it. got up Sunday morning, AD still alive (got her HP to thank for that) still dri...

CarlosNA · CarlosNA

When my GF was active, she sent her daughter up to Tennessee from Georgia to live with her daddy that she had only known for 2 years because he wanted nothing to do with a child until the time she was 12. She stayed there for 2 years and during that time, her mom completed a 6 month drug program, outpatient, a...

hanila · hanila

I've recently started a relationship with an old friend that I've known for years. I have always had feelings for him and now we are together, only I learned that he is an alcoholic. I'm so sad about this, but I like him so much and don't want it to end. Yesterday, we spent some time together at some outdo...

danz123 · danz123

July 12, 2009 (9 PM est) Business Meeting Agenda I. Review of June minutesII. Review of op meeting scheduleIII. Old businessA. Helper service position update ...

RLC · RLC

This past week I was thinking about the changes the Al-Anon program has made in my life. It dawned on me that one of the most important changes was "Not Reacting" to different situations in the way I had before coming to Al-Anon. Some examples are, now I try put my mind in gear before I put...

Suzannah · Suzannah

The following is a live chat I had with my daughter last night: 19:38xx feel sick... need sleep 19:39Me What's up xx...? Is it all getting to you? 19:40xx midwife appt and HE never showed... i rang him went to voicemail.. he text while she was here... he asks what is it i want from him exactly just wound up,...

ally · ally

Wow, this is a surprise on me this week! i've not done al-anon in eighteen months f2f or online! I practice in all my movements on a daily basis! After three years continued al-anon it kind of becomes a part of you! I have remained friends with some from the site and keep in daily contact with them! I still r...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

First I want to thank each of you who read and responded to my post from yesterday. I'm happy to report that I did not snoop at all! Today the urge is still there just a little, not nearly as consuming as yesterday. The program and the people in it have given me much strength and carried me sooo many times...

Ness · Ness

All my life Ive loved music... Im open to all kinds but always veer back to old blues and rock.I havent really been into my music for at least couple of years, yes I have the radio on in the background... but to actually chill, relax and really get into it...no....... WHY.....because Ason and I love the s...

Maria123 · Maria123

I got the phone call that broke me at the time . . . my brother called to say "Mom is dead." With no warning at all, no chance to say how much I loved her and how much she meant to me, she died in her sleep at the young age of 63 and here I was at 27 with 3 young babies myself and no mother. Bar none, my mothe...

Christy · Christy

Some of you might remember the winter before last that I posted pics of my tree that looked unsavable due to a ice storm. The weight of the ice split it down the middle and the branches hung to the ground. It held many memories. The tree and my son are the same age. That spring my neighbor and I decided we w...

Christy · Christy

It is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all. Laura Ingalls Wilder said that, and she was right. This seems such simple stuff, such simplistic knowledge, yet when we truly embrace it as our living reality, our day-to-day lives begin to change in very important ways. So tak...

maresie · maresie

I've found that it isn't just in relationships that I am idealistic. Somehow I have this idea that everything I put my hand in should be this idealistic perfect creation. I'm currently going to a therapy group and while I keep my mouth shut most of the time rahter than blurt out what I'm thinking I have t...

Matt_M · Matt_M

Thankyou all who answered my last post. The information was very helpful. I am feeling better about myself just reading your posts and talking with my sposor and other AA'ers. My wife spoke with a lady from Alanon that I met at an AA meeting. The meeting went well I think, but I still don't know what she wa...

maresie · maresie

I've been working pretty hard on what I do in relationships and how they become a cycle of despair, obsession and super commitment. Basically what happens is that I idealize the person and don't see the reality of who they are, then when they disappoint me (which is inevitable) I get enraged (needles...

Melissa21 · Melissa21

I know I shouldn't sit and complain or talk about the A just worry about me. But right now I just need to. I knew something was wrong with him shortly after meeting him..he had right side pain. And drinking is all that would help. It's been getting worse especially since I moved out almost 2 months ago. Im j...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Nowhere but nowhere in this programme does it say that I will find my life perfect, free from struggle, free from disappointment, free from yearnings, free from sadness that others will not make an effort to meet me half way. Everywhere in this programme it teaches me to look at myself, change myself,...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Hi Friends, I am warning you now, this is a vent. I've gone too long without al-anon and situations keep festering. Couldn't talk to my sponsor tonight, and I am about to blow. This may be long... Had a glorious vacation in Hawaii and now I am back to reality. By the way, it was totally worth it. Let's see...

Matt_M · Matt_M

I recently went to treatment for alcohol abuse and have 60 days of sobriety. My wife is still very hurt about the way I acted while I was a active alcoholic and wants a divorce. She doesn't think there is any way that things can get better. I am willing to do anything to save my marraige. She won't go to alano...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	sharing something (Preview) Most people here know I am a JW. Another person who considers themself a JW came down on me about some things I share here. I wanted to make it clear that I am here because I need to be here. Loving A's in my life is part of me. I learned to feel comfortable with that and make sure the pits of the disease no longer...	debilyn	6	614	Jul 14, 2009 by Suzannah
	When does this disease just DIE/Go Away... (Preview) Just wanted to update and say sorry I haven't been of much help here of late, been very busy in some things and very annoyed in others... Abrother now has the family in an up roar again, and I have backed out slowly but my Mom is still the Whip'n Post for everyone else. I am trying to deal with those feelings a...	Jozie	1	531	Jul 14, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	There is a pattern (Preview) My AHsober said that he had put in a bid on a house. Although, he says he wants a divorce we are still legally married. I told him that he can't do that. And if he does he will have to sell it when we divorce. He got really angry and hung up the phone. He has always been a good provider for our family. Every few yea...	nmike	6	653	Jul 14, 2009 by blender_girl
	What Would Al-Anon Do? (Preview) My husband seems to be slacking on the basic maintenance of our pool these days. The pool has always been his responsibility for as long as we've been together. We live in Arizona and it's really hot now, so the pool needs extra attention. Do I figure out how to do those things and start taking care of...	N8SMOM	9	533	Jul 14, 2009 by nmike
	A nice weekend! (Preview) I just wanted to share something nice for a change.....we had a terrific weekend! Took the kids to Storyland on Friday and just hung out the rest of the weekend. My A boyfriend did not drink at all which is strange. I'm not sure why he didn't but then we don't understand why they do anything they do. Al...	Holly09	2	317	Jul 14, 2009 by nmike
	Here we go again UPDATE (Preview) I posted a few days ago about my sister overdosing once again. To help make this clear I'll call the sister that overdosed sister #1 and the other sister #2. Yesterday sister #1's doctor asked to meet with the family today so my mother, sister #2, my brother and myself went over there. We sat for over a...	Mobirdie	4	721	Jul 14, 2009 by Temple
	thinking about my dad today (Preview) and how his bottom was his death. A son went to a MVA hearing today for his dui. His lawyer told him to bring someone with him as he would probably not be able to drive home after the hearing. The other day he called and made an appointment to have one of those things you blow into installed on his car. The appo...	Gailey	4	792	Jul 14, 2009 by Rita G
	News in... Arggggg (Preview) I swear, I don't know why we even have a system.. I mean honestly...My Abrother has been arrested EVERY YEAR for the last 12 years, "His 1st DWI was when he was 18" he will be 30 this Fri. Now all this crap started because He DID NOT show up at court, so they call the ones that bailed him out "...	Jozie	5	641	Jul 14, 2009 by Christy
	JUST GETTING STARTED (Preview) Hello, I am 48 yrs old, married 20yrs with 15yr boy/girl twins. For the last year our life has been a mess. My spouse is drinker and verbal abuser. His drinking and abuse has gotten worse over the years, last year things esclated to the point he moved out, in, out and in. I have been to counseling (alo...	Searching for Peace	4	491	Jul 14, 2009 by Searching for Peace
	A disease that makes ppl HATE you.... (Preview) Was just reading lots of posts and got to thinking.... Everyone keeps saying this is a disease, I liked the post that compared it to a mental disease - comparing it to a physical disease - I can see that straining my logic... A mental disorder can make ppl hate you, fear you, resent you, try to correct...	Loveridden	4	1814	Jul 14, 2009 by Loveridden
	THINK bracelets???????Where can I find one? (Preview) My ex used to have this cloth like bracelet he wore all the time that simply had the word THINK on it.....I would love to find one for myself as I could use the constant reminder but haven't been able to locate any online and will not call and ask where he got his... Does anyone know where I can find one of thes...	shellyj123	9	1414	Jul 14, 2009 by Loupiness
	ESH needed, fast track ticket to the pit (Preview) Hi all, been awhile since i have posted, but i still come here every morning to get my daily dose of love, support and esh... Lived through hell of living with my fiance for years, finally got to a point where it was me dying slowly or him. Told him to leave, dug into alanon and started a new life for me and my...	inhisarms	7	690	Jul 13, 2009 by nmike
	Good weekend:looking forward to another one! (Preview) Most of the time I try to live one day at a time! But lately I have been noticing that I look forward to the future a little more! It is kinda funny when you consider that I used to really look forward to dying & that I would definitely been in a better place than this "crappy" world! Today is...	Hoot Nanny	1	485	Jul 13, 2009 by Overcome
	Getting Married (Preview) Someone I care a great deal about is getting ready to do something I would normally advise against... she's going to marry an alcoholic... me!! I was married before. 5 years drinking, then 5 years sober. Then 15 years sober and single, over 12 without being in any kind of real relationship. We've b...	barisax	18	912	Jul 13, 2009 by barisax
	Here we go again (Preview) I have spent the majority of my life trying to protect the addicts/alcoholics in my family from themselves. I thank my higher power every night for this program for without it I hate to think where I would be right now. My sister has a long history of alcohol and prescription drug abuse. I have lost cou...	Mobirdie	4	423	Jul 13, 2009 by nmike
	In a relationship with an alcoholic and have more questions (Preview) Previously, I posted my experience with my "boyfriend" and how he's treated me in our relationship. He is an alcoholic. I don't know if these are actions caused by the alcoholism or not. To review my story, I had mentioned that he was critical of me or makes side comments about how I'm t...	hanila	8	1686	Jul 13, 2009 by mimi70
	I'm 1,000 miles away and my husband just checked himself in to the hospital. (Preview) I've never done or experienced anything like this before and I need help. My husband and I just got married about 3 weeks ago. We've always been long distance, and I'm at my home wrapping things up and packing before I make a permanent move to his home in Missouri in about another month. I just got off the p...	kinsey	5	835	Jul 13, 2009 by kinsey
	I love days like today! (Preview) Hello and Hugs, I love days like today. HP knew what he was doing when he woke me up before 9am this morning. I didn't have any plans, but wasn't wanting to wake up that early on my only day off. Anyways, trying to get healty I went to the grocery store and got some healty food. Washed ALL my clothes (too...	Sincerely	2	402	Jul 13, 2009 by glad lee
	HELP with chatroom problems (Preview) I use java and for some reason when I click to enter chat it doesn't load at all. Never had this problem before. I've cleared cookies and all that and it still isn't working. What do I do? I see the little java icon down by the time on the destop.... Never mind got it to work now! -- Edited by Melissa21 on Sunda...	Melissa21	1	501	Jul 12, 2009 by Jerry F
	hoping for a good week (Preview) i am hoping to have a good week this week. i'm hoping to keep not-smoking (one day at a time with that) and try to fit in some exercise. i'm wondering where my husband is right now, but am going to turn it over to my HP before i go to sleep. love and hope and peace to all of you , -xter	xter	1	414	Jul 12, 2009 by hotrod
	My role in alcoholism. (Preview) I've faced a LOT of pain in the last 7 months. Coming to terms with the fact that my husband had an affair and is an alcoholic is overwhelming most days. I had never known the depths of depression until this time. I have done a LOT of soul searching. I realize I have a very hard time facing my own emotion...	Inpain	8	932	Jul 12, 2009 by Inpain
	feel like I'm three despair breaking help (Preview) today I ws so scared of my roommate that I didn't come out of my room.	billileli1	7	7910	Jul 12, 2009 by Temple
	help a couple of questions (Preview) Hi, I am pretty new here. And I have been in the chat room and at some of the meetings. I have met some wonderful people and they have giving me some great advice. But how to you do it. I mean the advice you get. Here is a little history of my situation. Right now my husband is serving 88 days in county jail for h...	janmarie	3	422	Jul 12, 2009 by Jerry F
	Boundaries and heartache (Preview) On Thursday night I packed a small rucksack with a change of clothes, a towel, toiletries, mobile phone and charger, a copy of courage to change and a copy of this....... which was posted on MIP this last week..... A Cherokee fable: One evening, a grandfather was teaching his young grandson about the...	Ness	3	479	Jul 12, 2009 by Ness
	Why Do I............... (Preview) feel the need to defend myself? I hate that about myself! I am people pleasing, stupid, weak knee, ninny. I want to get past the point of being back on my heels, I was raised to not to confront, to keep things to yourself, no one wants to hear you complain. All the above I have taken with me through my life...	DreamsOver	6	450	Jul 12, 2009 by DreamsOver
	help for the al-ateen board (Preview) The teen board needs help. Teens are posting there again but there's no support for them. People need to reply to their posts and be there for them. I'm trying to do better again tho I don't always succeed. Lanchas	Lanchas	2	249	Jul 12, 2009 by Lanchas
	Business Meeting postponed (Preview) Because of the holiday weekend we are postponing the business meeting. We will meet on Sunday July 12th at 9pm est. Please pm me if you have any agenda items. Happy 4th of July . hugs, danz	danz123	1	391	Jul 12, 2009 by Lanchas
	Blame & the resentment (Preview) Going through my one day at a time in al anon book - I came across an entry that talks about blame and resentment. I will not post the entry here because I see that would be copyright infringement, but I would like to discuss it. My alcoholic boyfriend likes to blame EVERYTHING on me......everything an...	Loveridden	5	2757	Jul 12, 2009 by Loveridden
	What is happening? (Preview) I have a few questions, but I'll explain the situation first. My husband and I have been married almost 4 years, and have a very young son. He was an alcoholic when we married, and because of his violent temper, I had to demand that he keep his drinking under control (he wouldn't stop) but he worked his way...	Lotus	8	1023	Jul 12, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Detachment - Where to draw the line? (Preview) Hello, I'm new here. I'm new to all of this in fact. I've only been to one meeting a few weeks ago to see if it "made sense" to me. Unfortunately I am finding that it did. So here my question. I heard about Detachment and I have tried to read about it some on the web. I've been reading the some of...	Eve55	3	892	Jul 12, 2009 by Loveridden
	Doing better (Preview) Update from last post where A told me he is going to inpatient treatment and will need a new liver. I think when I posted I was just really scared and angry with him. I didn't know what to think. Maybe that was it I didn't THINK at all. I just started worrying and much of what I have learned hear sort of slipped...	Melissa21	2	367	Jul 11, 2009 by Melissa21
	first post at Alanon board, roommate doesnt' drink, but is dysfunctional (Preview) Hello. Billi here, and I have a dysfunctional housemate. I realize he doesn't have a drinking problem, but I suffer from the same kind of problem that an "AlAnon" might. He is depressed and won't go to therapy. I am watching him slowly die right now of depression. I cant' afford to move out,...	billileli1	4	701	Jul 11, 2009 by debilyn
	fears..... (Preview) I am just amazed at where my mind goes sometimes...the fear and anxiety that I actually manufacture on my own self! Gotta let go - let my HP take care of things, it's always the same answer.... Serenity is the goal, right? One day at a time! Best to everyone - Christine	CAM0914	3	605	Jul 11, 2009 by Jerry F
	Look inward first and then... (Preview) look elsewhere. Aloha Family. I was feeling a bit over weight in the mental, emotional and spiritual self and stopped what I was doing for a minute to look at why. It only takes a minute now LOL. What I found out was that I wasn't asking my self the "what is my part in the situation first". ...	Jerry F	7	812	Jul 11, 2009 by Jerry F
	No wonder I am single (Preview) Went down to the horses to check water and give scritchees. Picked up the piece of flat messed up hose that "somebody" Left acrossed the road all two weeks.... As I walked back one of those garden truck things, not very tall six wheels with a bed in back to put stuff in was coming. I went in my ga...	debilyn	15	925	Jul 11, 2009 by blender_girl
	Wy do I do this to myself? What causes these triggers? In need of some ESH.... (Preview) For some reason yesterday and today-especially today, I am consumed with the urge to snoop on EXABF's myspace page. I have no idea why, or where it came from. Perhaps it is my being sick and wanting what used to be comfort. Or an obsession- just wanting to know what/who he is doing. I don't know wher...	shellyj123	10	1044	Jul 11, 2009 by Jeanne
	Twice in a century...... (Preview) ((((Family)))), This is pretty cool. Precisely at 12:34:56 today we will have a complete number sequence of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 because today is 7/8 and the year is 2009! It happened earlier this morning too but I missed it. I had no idea until I heard it on the news. Neat stuff. Enjoy your day. Love and bl...	Karilynn	3	614	Jul 11, 2009 by Hoot Nanny
	its like I'm trying to convince him... (Preview) When I examine my behaviour towards my aH from whom I am separated I have realized that for the past several years, even while we were still together, I have this very annoying habit of trying to convince him what a jerk he is. It drives him crazy as you can imagine and actually it's pretty irritating for m...	Rora	7	877	Jul 11, 2009 by kitty
	New Here but not to the topic......... (Preview) I guess, I just need to dump a little. My son who is 28 years old had two wonderful years being clean (he had two years before too) and sober, but now he has no desire to be clean because he has a great job, girlfriend and life is going great. He has short term memory of the days he slept on a park bench or...	Jeanne	4	767	Jul 11, 2009 by Jeanne
	expectations (Preview) Wow once they get sober you realise how much you need to change even more so. I have been very resebtful and angrey, suffering the poor me's. Wanting everything to get better overnight now he is sober ( only been 2-3 months). I went to my f2f the subject was expectations and I realised to my shame that It...	Tracy	7	957	Jul 11, 2009 by debilyn
	It's getting better... (Preview) Taking care of me--taking naps when I need them! I am again struggling with sleep but it is getting better all the time! I guess that is a Beatles song! It's getting better all the time, better better so much better! I am focusing on myself a little better, too. I am not going to let others bring me down a...	Hoot Nanny	1	408	Jul 11, 2009 by ally
	one wk on (Preview) Im pleased with the way MOST things have gone this wk. Iv tried hard to look after ME with the help of my HP. last Saturday when my AD told me she was going to end her life i asked you all for help, and with your help i got through it. got up Sunday morning, AD still alive (got her HP to thank for that) still dri...	mary j	3	756	Jul 10, 2009 by Jerry F
	Recovering Addict GF is facing a custody battle (Preview) When my GF was active, she sent her daughter up to Tennessee from Georgia to live with her daddy that she had only known for 2 years because he wanted nothing to do with a child until the time she was 12. She stayed there for 2 years and during that time, her mom completed a 6 month drug program, outpatient, a...	CarlosNA	7	1373	Jul 10, 2009 by CarlosNA
	in a realtionship with an alcoholic and have questions (Preview) I've recently started a relationship with an old friend that I've known for years. I have always had feelings for him and now we are together, only I learned that he is an alcoholic. I'm so sad about this, but I like him so much and don't want it to end. Yesterday, we spent some time together at some outdo...	hanila	13	1010	Jul 10, 2009 by mimi70
	July Business Meeting Agenda (Preview) July 12, 2009 (9 PM est) Business Meeting Agenda I. Review of June minutesII. Review of op meeting scheduleIII. Old businessA. Helper service position update ...	danz123	0	495	Jul 10, 2009 by danz123
	"Not Reacting" (Preview) This past week I was thinking about the changes the Al-Anon program has made in my life. It dawned on me that one of the most important changes was "Not Reacting" to different situations in the way I had before coming to Al-Anon. Some examples are, now I try put my mind in gear before I put...	RLC	4	1076	Jul 10, 2009 by Rora
	So, how am I doing? (Preview) The following is a live chat I had with my daughter last night: 19:38xx feel sick... need sleep 19:39Me What's up xx...? Is it all getting to you? 19:40xx midwife appt and HE never showed... i rang him went to voicemail.. he text while she was here... he asks what is it i want from him exactly just wound up,...	Suzannah	1	583	Jul 10, 2009 by debilyn
	Struggling To Find A Balance (Preview) Wow, this is a surprise on me this week! i've not done al-anon in eighteen months f2f or online! I practice in all my movements on a daily basis! After three years continued al-anon it kind of becomes a part of you! I have remained friends with some from the site and keep in daily contact with them! I still r...	ally	3	1739	Jul 10, 2009 by Suzannah
	Made it through another struggle........ (Preview) First I want to thank each of you who read and responded to my post from yesterday. I'm happy to report that I did not snoop at all! Today the urge is still there just a little, not nearly as consuming as yesterday. The program and the people in it have given me much strength and carried me sooo many times...	shellyj123	1	383	Jul 10, 2009 by Lilly Burn
	Reclaiming ME....part 2.... (Preview) All my life Ive loved music... Im open to all kinds but always veer back to old blues and rock.I havent really been into my music for at least couple of years, yes I have the radio on in the background... but to actually chill, relax and really get into it...no....... WHY.....because Ason and I love the s...	Ness	3	707	Jul 10, 2009 by Christy
	My Mom, 20 years ago today . . . (Preview) I got the phone call that broke me at the time . . . my brother called to say "Mom is dead." With no warning at all, no chance to say how much I loved her and how much she meant to me, she died in her sleep at the young age of 63 and here I was at 27 with 3 young babies myself and no mother. Bar none, my mothe...	Maria123	6	860	Jul 10, 2009 by Karilynn
	Speaking of trees.... (Preview) Some of you might remember the winter before last that I posted pics of my tree that looked unsavable due to a ice storm. The weight of the ice split it down the middle and the branches hung to the ground. It held many memories. The tree and my son are the same age. That spring my neighbor and I decided we w...	Christy	8	910	Jul 10, 2009 by Karilynn
	The simple things in life.. (Preview) It is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all. Laura Ingalls Wilder said that, and she was right. This seems such simple stuff, such simplistic knowledge, yet when we truly embrace it as our living reality, our day-to-day lives begin to change in very important ways. So tak...	Christy	7	656	Jul 9, 2009 by tea2
	Idealism (Preview) I've found that it isn't just in relationships that I am idealistic. Somehow I have this idea that everything I put my hand in should be this idealistic perfect creation. I'm currently going to a therapy group and while I keep my mouth shut most of the time rahter than blurt out what I'm thinking I have t...	maresie	4	698	Jul 9, 2009 by Jean4444
	Thankyou all (Preview) Thankyou all who answered my last post. The information was very helpful. I am feeling better about myself just reading your posts and talking with my sposor and other AA'ers. My wife spoke with a lady from Alanon that I met at an AA meeting. The meeting went well I think, but I still don't know what she wa...	Matt_M	2	566	Jul 9, 2009 by Sincerely
	Abandonment issues (Preview) I've been working pretty hard on what I do in relationships and how they become a cycle of despair, obsession and super commitment. Basically what happens is that I idealize the person and don't see the reality of who they are, then when they disappoint me (which is inevitable) I get enraged (needles...	maresie	8	1155	Jul 9, 2009 by Bella333
	I need some ESH (Preview) I know I shouldn't sit and complain or talk about the A just worry about me. But right now I just need to. I knew something was wrong with him shortly after meeting him..he had right side pain. And drinking is all that would help. It's been getting worse especially since I moved out almost 2 months ago. Im j...	Melissa21	9	938	Jul 9, 2009 by Jerry F
	A waste of energy so STOP, regroup, and redirect that energy into a positive action in my own recovery programme. (Preview) Nowhere but nowhere in this programme does it say that I will find my life perfect, free from struggle, free from disappointment, free from yearnings, free from sadness that others will not make an effort to meet me half way. Everywhere in this programme it teaches me to look at myself, change myself,...	Suzannah	6	781	Jul 9, 2009 by maresie
	Home from Hawaii and I need a meeting! (Preview) Hi Friends, I am warning you now, this is a vent. I've gone too long without al-anon and situations keep festering. Couldn't talk to my sponsor tonight, and I am about to blow. This may be long... Had a glorious vacation in Hawaii and now I am back to reality. By the way, it was totally worth it. Let's see...	Loupiness	6	866	Jul 9, 2009 by thinkstoomuch
	Recovering alcoholic trying to save a marraige. (Preview) I recently went to treatment for alcohol abuse and have 60 days of sobriety. My wife is still very hurt about the way I acted while I was a active alcoholic and wants a divorce. She doesn't think there is any way that things can get better. I am willing to do anything to save my marraige. She won't go to alano...	Matt_M	9	1865	Jul 9, 2009 by thinkstoomuch
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.