Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Greenvalleygal · Greenvalleygal

My 29 year old son has been sober for a couple of weeks and looking for a job. He rents our garage apartment that belongs to my husband, his step-dad. Rent was due on the first and he does not have it but my ex needed some help today cutting up a downed tree which gave him the opportunity to work off some of th...

glad · glad

I started step work then chickened out as I got closer to to making the list of "wrongs" and then having the share them. there just seeem to be to many - in my life growing up tasting the peanut butter with your finger was punishable by a full day of "time out" back before time out was i...

glad · glad

I typing what was supposed to be a short note to my A on my computer - unsure if i shoud be putting that in writting or not upexpectedly the power went out and I "lost" all I had entered into the computer-- I smiled and thanked God for his patience with me> I have been praying to him for years...

Karilynn · Karilynn

I received an email from Hazelden for families with children who are addicted. I thought I would pass it along to those who need it. Another resource for this terrible disease: www.FamiliesFacingAddiction.org

kath · kath

I am raising my children, 8,9, and 18 mos by myself because I choose not to live with my AH. He is out playing golf, getting high and living the single life. I am going back to school in a few weeks to finish my degree, which will be no easy task while he gets to sit around and party and have fun. Why in the h*** di...

Samsgram · Samsgram

Now I know I was doing pretty good with not asking my mother to see if she could help my daughter out in her time of need since she is behind on the rent and I also didn`t cave fall the loan business. But last week she was out with friend and don`t you know she twists her ankle and shes on crutches this week and ca...

Sara Tamar · Sara Tamar

I'm sure you've all heard this a million times before, but I never -- repeat, NEVER -- thought I'd be in this situation. I come from a background where excess drinking (and recreational drug use) is shameful and abhorrent. I don't drink at all, and have never even smoked a joint. Yet here I am, a suc...

kerry5 · kerry5

This months business meeting is scheduled for Sunday August 15th 2010 at 9pm est. Attendance to the business meeting in July was low and it had to be canceled. It is important that we all make an effort to attend these meetings. Where issues are addressed and voted on as a group conscience. This roo...

kath · kath

I realize how absolutely obsessed I have become regarding my husband's addiction. I think about him all the time. I am angry with him all the time. Step One says that we are powerless over them and our lives had become unmanageable. That is what is happening to me. I suffer from guilt because I spend way t...

Jerry F · Jerry F

came into the room this Super Saturday AFG meeting morning. What else could I feel and then do what I felt and was done for me when I first got here. While the rest of the group seemed for the moment to forget what it was like I certainly didn't and I heard, felt, and reexperienced her pain. Who cared wha...

sterling7 · sterling7

Hi Everyone, I haven't been on here for quite some time. The last time I posted, my husband was in detox. He had a pretty good almost-year, but in May he slipped and broke a boundary that I had set (that there will be no more drug use in the house). So I asked him to leave and we're now separated. I'm now act...

rainbojo66 · rainbojo66

I made it out, It was a GOOD experience. I know over time it will only benefit me. Through her daughter...only emerging but having lived with her for 13 years...i see the behaviours which have already taken root...so much people pleasing. So sad. I see myself...and I know will be better able to ident...

brokenbeatscareddiehard · brokenbeatscareddiehard

As to the lost part, I have been married now for 13 years to my best friend, the one I confide in, The one I love more than my own life. I have given everything I have to my marriage, I have been completly faithful physicly and mentally. Thats is where the so lost it hurts comes in. When I married her I knew...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), Thought you might enjoy seeing some pictures of Piper Samantha Midnight B-J I! This is my life. This is why I keep coming back to Alanon. I'm such a codependent to this cat! Have a wonderful weekend. Much love & blessings to all! Live strong, Karilynn & Piper the Pouncing P...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

It was told to me that I won't be happy until I give myself permission to be happy. Right now I'm busy case building against myself and subsequently why I shouldn't be happy. I've thought about forgiving myself.....how do you do that.....well I had a thought: I have a beautiful, wonderful daughter (a...

xd · xd

Well, I had to go to our family doctor today, and when he asked how my wife was doing (metastatic cancer), I spontaneously decided it was time to let him know about her "other" disease. She came to me this AM after a two-day drunk and expressed that she really wanted to stop doing this to hersel...

rainbojo66 · rainbojo66

Hi everyone, my name is josee and I am a first day grateful member of this group. I have received so much help already...but wow do i ahve far to go. I am visiting my AH sister for the first time in 8 years. Long story short...she is 12 years older than I, (I am the last of 7 and adopted) and she and my other sis...

xd · xd

Well, in my (unsuccessful thus far) quest to find a local group that is a good fit for me, I tried another one listed on the area roster this evening. When I got there, I was informed that the AlAnon group that met there stopped about a year ago, but I was welcome to join this (small) open AA meeting. I hesita...

lyndebi · lyndebi

Not even sure I should bring this up A man is interested in me. He is of the same religious beliefs. He had me do that messenger thing. He is polite and sent pics. Is VERY good looking, has HUGE beautiful house, probably what every woman would want. Here I am scared to death, feeling I just cannot relate to a...

Rocky38 · Rocky38

Hi MIP Family, I wanted to share my gratitude for a feeling of inner peace that has grown from the tiniest seed that was planted when I first found alanon. As I look back, I can see there were times the seed of inner peace just sat within me, not sprouting, but still possible as I learned how to put one foot...

Samsgram · Samsgram

Not sure why. I sent a note a week ago to whomever was listed on the site but never heard back. Anyone have any idea why or what I can do?

Garden of Mirrors · Garden of Mirrors

Some people cannot leave. I do not mean they are unable to do so. I mean, literally, that they have no options and cannot leave the situation. Please do not argue away this assertion because I know from my own life that there are gaps in our societal safety nets. Circumstantially I am currently unable to...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

Still not buying the higher power stuff in the sense that I felt abandoned by him (her, it, whatever) a while ago. I do remember a meeting or a reading passage where someone said that they got that step in pieces....they came......(at first that was all), then they "came to" (as in woke up et...

kitty · kitty

I've learned that for me to keep what I want, to keep the understanding I gain in recovery, I must be constarntly consciously practising it. If I want love, understanding, forgiveness, loving detachment, faith ~ al of these things are things I must be actively practising to keep. I cant just do it on...

Gailey · Gailey

got back to my f2f meeting last night. It is like everything else...once you stop doing something it is hard to get back to it. I was fighting with myself. I didn't want to go. I wanted an easier, softer way. I wanted to go to bed , sleep and forget about life for awhile. I know I said about 3 times that I wasn'...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I'm amazed how low I can feel sometimes. Because I really think long and hard about things, I often come up with negative arguments (against myself, my life etc.) that they are hard to contradict, therefore making me depressed. But I find that with some reminders from here, I can also think of equally...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

Not trying to be dramatic here....I was in therapy in my 30's and worked through a lot of stuff, and was so grateful that I had feeling I've got the the rest of my life to apply what I'd learned and be happier. Well here I am at 50, back in therapy, feeling back at square 1, and feeling like it's too late to make...

Jozie · Jozie

As Most know I have been fighting some off the wall addictions that I have noticed here of late, Another would be my Addiction to "Needing" others With Me... Sounds Crazy I know, but for me, about the only time I am TRULY alone, is when I go to the Market, or to the Local department store, & s...

DareToDream · DareToDream

My AH B was sober for 10 yrs before I met him. He started drinking heavily shortly after we met. I was very new at this and just wanted to run away as I felt like I did not have enough vested. We became more serious in betwen bouts of drinking and he got a DUI and stopped while on probation so he spent 30 days in ja...

kath · kath

I married a man that I knew had a history of drug use (pot). Before we were married I asked him if he did that anymore and he said no. NaievlyI thought he was like me, was a partier in the early days, but settled down after having kids. Not true. I realized after my daughters and I moved in with him that he is a ch...

tlcate · tlcate

Well, this is clear as mud I think . . . but here goes. Ok, this is going to seem small and strange, but it was big for me. I am talking to my daughter, she is telling me things about her friends and going to the fair etc. She is chatting away, I am interested and comment in return. Then her story is over. I con...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

This one might be long, but I'm mainly venting for myself........ I have begun to accept (for the past couple of days) that I am not a multi-tasker. I have strong ADD and have not been on my meds for quite some time (caused conflict with my mom in law trying to control that) as I do not have health insuran...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

Still feel a little bothered that "God" (I do believe in "a" God....just not sure what he's going to do for me, or how, if anything) hasn't been much help to me at many times in my life. So I dont' have this faith in a power greater than myself that can restore my to sanity. But some co...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

I must admit I watch this show Kourtney and Kloe take Miami. Guilty pleasure Does anyone here shames my shameful secret and watches this show? Last episode this guy Scott got drunk or something, threw a fit and ended up in the hospital. I've been there, done that and even have the freaking tshirt!! Tha...

hope for the flowers · hope for the flowers

Well I just went to my first meeting. Wow! Wonderful people! I feel so much better then fighting this alone for 10 months. I think if I work on myself the situation with my boyfrined who i love very much should inprove. Just a question does this also work with players/cheeters? I understand the alcholic...

xd · xd

Hello. I've tried a few live AlAnon meetings, but haven't found the right group, I guess. My wife is an A, has battled it on and off for years, with a 3-year dry stretch. In the past, the drinking was almost always just in the evenings, and there would be stretches of weeks where she wouldn't drink. It's be...

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

Ok people. I need some your ES&H today. I am so down today. I believe that my AH is drinking (of course he denies it). But I have this instinct about it and my gut tells me that he is drinking. So... when he got back from his fourth rehab, I set rules that we needed to live by, in order to stay on track w...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

These are from meetings I've gone to over the years...they are not the official slogans, but are reminiscent (probably based on them): 1. Don't just do something, stand there. 2. Wherever you go, there YOU are. 3. Instead of worrying that it will take 5 years, imagine 5 years from now if you don't do...

tlcate · tlcate

I don't know if anyone else has noticed, but our guests are usually low in number, not awful but not what they have been. Since the Dr. Phil episode our number of guests has exploded. To the point I initially thought it was a glitch. Perhaps it is, but I hope not. I like big families!!! We are glad you are...

Junko · Junko

Hi, I am a newcomer of Al-Anon (although I've been to seven meetings) and it has been hard.. First two weeks, I struggled with the idea of God, Higher Power and being powerless over alcohol. The third week, I accepted that there is Higher Power and felt great. The fourth week has been a confusion week and...

Maxsmom · Maxsmom

I've never posted anything so personal online before but I am desperate and have nowhere else to turn. I've been dating this man for about 9 months and before we started dating I had heard he had an issue with drinking. 2 DUI's, relationship issues, etc. By the time we started dating, he assured me that...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I feel like going into my room closing the door and not come out. I am trying so hard to hold it together since I put my AS out of my deceased mother's home for using it for a hang out for his drug use, and letting people come in the house that have no respect for the property or for him or for anyone for that mat...

buick23 · buick23

Got blamed for something I have no control over again. I reminded myself I don't have that much power and I knew hp was right there with me. I didn't handle it perfect, but pretty good. When will the tests be over with and I can get a final grade? lol buick

BrokenBunny · BrokenBunny

I am so sorry, this is long .... I have to vent. Sitting here at 4:30 in the morning, as I couldn't sleep. Cried all night and trying to so hard to keep my focus. I look at my children and I feel so hurt and so sorry of what I am putting them through. They seem to be a bigger force than me from the outside, as th...

Adabnu · Adabnu

Those may remember me, I was crying aloud here a month ago about my misery of breaking up with my alcoholic fiancée. Here is some positive sharing for those who are in the middle of the crisis or dealing with the lost right now. He is/was a wonderful guy when he is sober or when he does not drink excessively...

Maxsmom · Maxsmom

I have only been a member since yesterday. I am so grateful to all of you who helped me with my dilemma. (alcoholic boyfriend) I was feeling so badly today that while at work, I kept this website minimized so I could look when I felt like i needed to. Thank you thank you thank you! I have found a place where I b...

sunnydaze · sunnydaze

New here. I want to say "I'm done." Over and done with the A's in my family. Does anybody ever just want to leave their AH/W?? Why not??? Why do we have to be the ones who bend over backward to stay sane when they make us crazy! The DUI's, the wrecked finances resulting in bankruptcy (and I'...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

For the sake of honesty and because it's on my mind alot, I feel I should open up and spill my guts on this. I began therapy about two years ago...sex therapy to be exact to address some issues my wife complained about (and although she was part of the problem, I admit were true). I called a male therapist r...

Jerry F · Jerry F

In the three seconds between what triggers me and how I respond to it. I got this echo at the morning meeting I attended. It was as if the speaker was reading my recovery journal because I heard his voice in tandem with my elder sponsor's voices. What an amazing gift because it remains the truth for me t...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

This came up in therapy not to long ago.....my therapist remarked that I worry too much about what others think of me, I assume that they do or will think negatively of me, and that I tend to judge myself or my efforts based on this....i think she's right of course.... But I cant' help but compare my life to...

Jozie · Jozie

Hi All... Here recenty I have been Covering some pretty big miles stones in my life, things have been happening so fast that at times I seem to forget the important stuff, and this week has been a HUGE Reminder of that... Yesterday My One & Only Child turned 13 and the thought of him growing up and leav...

Karilynn · Karilynn

In loving memory of my mother: June 19, 1932- August 1, 1982. Hard to believe you've been gone this long. I was only 19. But those 19 years were the best. If I can be 1/10 as good as you were, I'm doing okay. Give my love to Dad & Tim. "Your heart was made of holidays. Your smile was made of dawn....

renee · renee

My son who is 25 has had issues with alcohol since late high school. He doesn't seem to know when to stop and keeps getting into trouble. The last incident was an accident where he fell on concrete and had to have 6 hours of reconstructive surgery on his face. He is back living with me now and has to pay me...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

That phrase was a Freudian slip, that my therapist swears I uttered one day (I didn't remember saying it but have no reason to doubt her....even if she were to be wrong...it's a true statement). That is what I do....I focus on the negative stuff and don't give myself a chance to be happy......I even had...

buick23 · buick23

I'm keeping up with my meetings this time around and have been so much better with my thinking and attitude since. One thing I have noticed at the meetings nowdays. I catch myself smiling alot and can laugh about things. When I attended meetings years ago I was so serious and unhappy and I didn't underst...

Maize · Maize

I would like to recant this post. I understand what you are all saying. Thanks -- Edited by Maize on Tuesday 3rd of August 2010 08:12:39 AM -- Edited by Maize on Tuesday 3rd of August 2010 05:59:26 PM

oscarmom · oscarmom

a great lady and a great accomplishment. gotta love someone who has 10 kids, 15 grandkids and stayed sober and sane! she's aptly named Joy as for my husband, sober over 100 days now. hope it stays that way, every now and then my apprehension creeps in...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

My marriage is at a point where I'm actually grateful on the days there isn't a crisis and it proceeds normally. Of course normal in my marriage is zero affection form wife, zero help from wife and , zero common courtesy from the wife. The only saving grace is my daughter is wonderful and I love my litt...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

Well, my AH whom I recently separated from (three weeks ago) asked me for money last week. He's got a stable career, has not provided any child support for the last two weeks (as I'm letting him fix the financialy situation before we get back together).....I did give him back two hundered dollars to cat...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

Considering the idea that I wouldn't be any more happy or satisfied if I met my goals and dreams. Maybe they wouldn't be good enough once I had them. That's definately something I could believe about myself. I do need to appreciate what's around me and what I do have and can do now.

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Whats a Mother to do (Preview) My 29 year old son has been sober for a couple of weeks and looking for a job. He rents our garage apartment that belongs to my husband, his step-dad. Rent was due on the first and he does not have it but my ex needed some help today cutting up a downed tree which gave him the opportunity to work off some of th...	Greenvalleygal	3	871	Aug 8, 2010 by Greenvalleygal
	Want to be the real me--soon ! (Preview) I started step work then chickened out as I got closer to to making the list of "wrongs" and then having the share them. there just seeem to be to many - in my life growing up tasting the peanut butter with your finger was punishable by a full day of "time out" back before time out was i...	glad	9	899	Aug 8, 2010 by Jerry F
	God Protects and guides (Preview) I typing what was supposed to be a short note to my A on my computer - unsure if i shoud be putting that in writting or not upexpectedly the power went out and I "lost" all I had entered into the computer-- I smiled and thanked God for his patience with me> I have been praying to him for years...	glad	2	684	Aug 8, 2010 by Jerry F
	FYI Children & Addiction (Preview) I received an email from Hazelden for families with children who are addicted. I thought I would pass it along to those who need it. Another resource for this terrible disease: www.FamiliesFacingAddiction.org	Karilynn	2	1033	Aug 8, 2010 by Jerry F
	just need to vent... (Preview) I am raising my children, 8,9, and 18 mos by myself because I choose not to live with my AH. He is out playing golf, getting high and living the single life. I am going back to school in a few weeks to finish my degree, which will be no easy task while he gets to sit around and party and have fun. Why in the h*** di...	kath	4	714	Aug 8, 2010 by kath
	Having a Hard Time Today (Preview) Now I know I was doing pretty good with not asking my mother to see if she could help my daughter out in her time of need since she is behind on the rent and I also didn`t cave fall the loan business. But last week she was out with friend and don`t you know she twists her ankle and shes on crutches this week and ca...	Samsgram	3	924	Aug 8, 2010 by Jerry F
	All new to me -- would love guidance from those who have been there, done that (Preview) I'm sure you've all heard this a million times before, but I never -- repeat, NEVER -- thought I'd be in this situation. I come from a background where excess drinking (and recreational drug use) is shameful and abhorrent. I don't drink at all, and have never even smoked a joint. Yet here I am, a suc...	Sara Tamar	10	957	Aug 8, 2010 by Jerry F
	Business Meeting Scheduled for August 15th 9pm (Preview) This months business meeting is scheduled for Sunday August 15th 2010 at 9pm est. Attendance to the business meeting in July was low and it had to be canceled. It is important that we all make an effort to attend these meetings. Where issues are addressed and voted on as a group conscience. This roo...	kerry5	0	386	Aug 7, 2010 by kerry5
	the steps kath (Preview) I realize how absolutely obsessed I have become regarding my husband's addiction. I think about him all the time. I am angry with him all the time. Step One says that we are powerless over them and our lives had become unmanageable. That is what is happening to me. I suffer from guilt because I spend way t...	kath	7	988	Aug 7, 2010 by kath
	Another newcomer... (Preview) came into the room this Super Saturday AFG meeting morning. What else could I feel and then do what I felt and was done for me when I first got here. While the rest of the group seemed for the moment to forget what it was like I certainly didn't and I heard, felt, and reexperienced her pain. Who cared wha...	Jerry F	3	808	Aug 7, 2010 by hotrod
	Update (Preview) Hi Everyone, I haven't been on here for quite some time. The last time I posted, my husband was in detox. He had a pretty good almost-year, but in May he slipped and broke a boundary that I had set (that there will be no more drug use in the house). So I asked him to leave and we're now separated. I'm now act...	sterling7	4	709	Aug 7, 2010 by Karilynn
	Home...and so grateful (Preview) I made it out, It was a GOOD experience. I know over time it will only benefit me. Through her daughter...only emerging but having lived with her for 13 years...i see the behaviours which have already taken root...so much people pleasing. So sad. I see myself...and I know will be better able to ident...	rainbojo66	3	762	Aug 7, 2010 by Jerry F
	So lost it hurts, So confused I am mad, So scared, but will not run. (closed) (Preview) As to the lost part, I have been married now for 13 years to my best friend, the one I confide in, The one I love more than my own life. I have given everything I have to my marriage, I have been completly faithful physicly and mentally. Thats is where the so lost it hurts comes in. When I married her I knew...	brokenbeatscareddiehard	14	1344	Aug 7, 2010 by Karilynn
	Piper Pictures (Preview) (((Family))), Thought you might enjoy seeing some pictures of Piper Samantha Midnight B-J I! This is my life. This is why I keep coming back to Alanon. I'm such a codependent to this cat! Have a wonderful weekend. Much love & blessings to all! Live strong, Karilynn & Piper the Pouncing P...	Karilynn	4	1240	Aug 7, 2010 by Rocky38
	Forgiving myself........ (Preview) It was told to me that I won't be happy until I give myself permission to be happy. Right now I'm busy case building against myself and subsequently why I shouldn't be happy. I've thought about forgiving myself.....how do you do that.....well I had a thought: I have a beautiful, wonderful daughter (a...	mjhyankees	5	760	Aug 7, 2010 by kitty
	Anyone have experience with Campral drug? (Preview) Well, I had to go to our family doctor today, and when he asked how my wife was doing (metastatic cancer), I spontaneously decided it was time to let him know about her "other" disease. She came to me this AM after a two-day drunk and expressed that she really wanted to stop doing this to hersel...	xd	5	1805	Aug 7, 2010 by stopandchat
	I don't want to PLAY anymore. (Preview) Hi everyone, my name is josee and I am a first day grateful member of this group. I have received so much help already...but wow do i ahve far to go. I am visiting my AH sister for the first time in 8 years. Long story short...she is 12 years older than I, (I am the last of 7 and adopted) and she and my other sis...	rainbojo66	7	993	Aug 6, 2010 by Christy
	Went to an open AA meeting- WOW! (Preview) Well, in my (unsuccessful thus far) quest to find a local group that is a good fit for me, I tried another one listed on the area roster this evening. When I got there, I was informed that the AlAnon group that met there stopped about a year ago, but I was welcome to join this (small) open AA meeting. I hesita...	xd	8	1523	Aug 6, 2010 by Dave Harm
	I am hopeless (Preview) Not even sure I should bring this up A man is interested in me. He is of the same religious beliefs. He had me do that messenger thing. He is polite and sent pics. Is VERY good looking, has HUGE beautiful house, probably what every woman would want. Here I am scared to death, feeling I just cannot relate to a...	lyndebi	11	1093	Aug 6, 2010 by kitty
	Inner peace (Preview) Hi MIP Family, I wanted to share my gratitude for a feeling of inner peace that has grown from the tiniest seed that was planted when I first found alanon. As I look back, I can see there were times the seed of inner peace just sat within me, not sprouting, but still possible as I learned how to put one foot...	Rocky38	8	835	Aug 6, 2010 by tlcate
	I Can`t Access Meetings (Preview) Not sure why. I sent a note a week ago to whomever was listed on the site but never heard back. Anyone have any idea why or what I can do?	Samsgram	5	781	Aug 6, 2010 by Samsgram
	support for those who cannot leave (Preview) Some people cannot leave. I do not mean they are unable to do so. I mean, literally, that they have no options and cannot leave the situation. Please do not argue away this assertion because I know from my own life that there are gaps in our societal safety nets. Circumstantially I am currently unable to...	Garden of Mirrors	15	1233	Aug 6, 2010 by Aloha
	Maybe this is a start................................ (Preview) Still not buying the higher power stuff in the sense that I felt abandoned by him (her, it, whatever) a while ago. I do remember a meeting or a reading passage where someone said that they got that step in pieces....they came......(at first that was all), then they "came to" (as in woke up et...	mjhyankees	4	692	Aug 6, 2010 by flinn66
	the way to keep it (Preview) I've learned that for me to keep what I want, to keep the understanding I gain in recovery, I must be constarntly consciously practising it. If I want love, understanding, forgiveness, loving detachment, faith ~ al of these things are things I must be actively practising to keep. I cant just do it on...	kitty	8	753	Aug 6, 2010 by maresie
	FINALLY!!!!!!! (Preview) got back to my f2f meeting last night. It is like everything else...once you stop doing something it is hard to get back to it. I was fighting with myself. I didn't want to go. I wanted an easier, softer way. I wanted to go to bed , sleep and forget about life for awhile. I know I said about 3 times that I wasn'...	Gailey	2	700	Aug 6, 2010 by Rocky38
	Mood is gradually getting better.... (Preview) I'm amazed how low I can feel sometimes. Because I really think long and hard about things, I often come up with negative arguments (against myself, my life etc.) that they are hard to contradict, therefore making me depressed. But I find that with some reminders from here, I can also think of equally...	mjhyankees	2	472	Aug 6, 2010 by mjhyankees
	I'm down that my work on myself is too little to late... (Preview) Not trying to be dramatic here....I was in therapy in my 30's and worked through a lot of stuff, and was so grateful that I had feeling I've got the the rest of my life to apply what I'd learned and be happier. Well here I am at 50, back in therapy, feeling back at square 1, and feeling like it's too late to make...	mjhyankees	13	845	Aug 6, 2010 by mjhyankees
	Feeling the Fear... (Preview) As Most know I have been fighting some off the wall addictions that I have noticed here of late, Another would be my Addiction to "Needing" others With Me... Sounds Crazy I know, but for me, about the only time I am TRULY alone, is when I go to the Market, or to the Local department store, & s...	Jozie	4	1237	Aug 6, 2010 by Gailey
	Confused (Preview) My AH B was sober for 10 yrs before I met him. He started drinking heavily shortly after we met. I was very new at this and just wanted to run away as I felt like I did not have enough vested. We became more serious in betwen bouts of drinking and he got a DUI and stopped while on probation so he spent 30 days in ja...	DareToDream	11	887	Aug 6, 2010 by DareToDream
	husband wont stop smoking pot kath (Preview) I married a man that I knew had a history of drug use (pot). Before we were married I asked him if he did that anymore and he said no. NaievlyI thought he was like me, was a partier in the early days, but settled down after having kids. Not true. I realized after my daughters and I moved in with him that he is a ch...	kath	8	3372	Aug 6, 2010 by lyndebi
	Light Bulb Moment (Preview) Well, this is clear as mud I think . . . but here goes. Ok, this is going to seem small and strange, but it was big for me. I am talking to my daughter, she is telling me things about her friends and going to the fair etc. She is chatting away, I am interested and comment in return. Then her story is over. I con...	tlcate	4	522	Aug 6, 2010 by Loupiness
	focus (Preview) This one might be long, but I'm mainly venting for myself........ I have begun to accept (for the past couple of days) that I am not a multi-tasker. I have strong ADD and have not been on my meds for quite some time (caused conflict with my mom in law trying to control that) as I do not have health insuran...	RoseODAT	2	504	Aug 5, 2010 by Rocky38
	Trying to work with this higher power stuff...... (Preview) Still feel a little bothered that "God" (I do believe in "a" God....just not sure what he's going to do for me, or how, if anything) hasn't been much help to me at many times in my life. So I dont' have this faith in a power greater than myself that can restore my to sanity. But some co...	mjhyankees	3	702	Aug 5, 2010 by Rocky38
	A silly reality show (Preview) I must admit I watch this show Kourtney and Kloe take Miami. Guilty pleasure Does anyone here shames my shameful secret and watches this show? Last episode this guy Scott got drunk or something, threw a fit and ended up in the hospital. I've been there, done that and even have the freaking tshirt!! Tha...	Priscilla83	3	702	Aug 5, 2010 by Jennifer
	new to al-anon (Preview) Well I just went to my first meeting. Wow! Wonderful people! I feel so much better then fighting this alone for 10 months. I think if I work on myself the situation with my boyfrined who i love very much should inprove. Just a question does this also work with players/cheeters? I understand the alcholic...	hope for the flowers	10	835	Aug 5, 2010 by bud
	Trapped, guess I just need to vent (Preview) Hello. I've tried a few live AlAnon meetings, but haven't found the right group, I guess. My wife is an A, has battled it on and off for years, with a 3-year dry stretch. In the past, the drinking was almost always just in the evenings, and there would be stretches of weeks where she wouldn't drink. It's be...	xd	8	948	Aug 5, 2010 by xd
	Really down today (Preview) Ok people. I need some your ES&H today. I am so down today. I believe that my AH is drinking (of course he denies it). But I have this instinct about it and my gut tells me that he is drinking. So... when he got back from his fourth rehab, I set rules that we needed to live by, in order to stay on track w...	Sweet Stanley	9	838	Aug 5, 2010 by doloresbscrap
	Some memorable statements from alanon..... (Preview) These are from meetings I've gone to over the years...they are not the official slogans, but are reminiscent (probably based on them): 1. Don't just do something, stand there. 2. Wherever you go, there YOU are. 3. Instead of worrying that it will take 5 years, imagine 5 years from now if you don't do...	mjhyankees	2	757	Aug 5, 2010 by hotrod
	Guests . . . we are glad you are here. (Preview) I don't know if anyone else has noticed, but our guests are usually low in number, not awful but not what they have been. Since the Dr. Phil episode our number of guests has exploded. To the point I initially thought it was a glitch. Perhaps it is, but I hope not. I like big families!!! We are glad you are...	tlcate	2	579	Aug 5, 2010 by mjhyankees
	After 7 meetings, I am still not sure whether Al-Anon is for me or not. (Preview) Hi, I am a newcomer of Al-Anon (although I've been to seven meetings) and it has been hard.. First two weeks, I struggled with the idea of God, Higher Power and being powerless over alcohol. The third week, I accepted that there is Higher Power and felt great. The fourth week has been a confusion week and...	Junko	13	1373	Aug 5, 2010 by Junko
	I'm new here and really desperate (Preview) I've never posted anything so personal online before but I am desperate and have nowhere else to turn. I've been dating this man for about 9 months and before we started dating I had heard he had an issue with drinking. 2 DUI's, relationship issues, etc. By the time we started dating, he assured me that...	Maxsmom	28	1305	Aug 5, 2010 by juliev
	Trying To Hold It Together..... (Preview) I feel like going into my room closing the door and not come out. I am trying so hard to hold it together since I put my AS out of my deceased mother's home for using it for a hang out for his drug use, and letting people come in the house that have no respect for the property or for him or for anyone for that mat...	DreamsOver	9	943	Aug 4, 2010 by tlcate
	powerless (Preview) Got blamed for something I have no control over again. I reminded myself I don't have that much power and I knew hp was right there with me. I didn't handle it perfect, but pretty good. When will the tests be over with and I can get a final grade? lol buick	buick23	6	981	Aug 4, 2010 by buick23
	What is wrong with me.... (Preview) I am so sorry, this is long .... I have to vent. Sitting here at 4:30 in the morning, as I couldn't sleep. Cried all night and trying to so hard to keep my focus. I look at my children and I feel so hurt and so sorry of what I am putting them through. They seem to be a bigger force than me from the outside, as th...	BrokenBunny	10	1836	Aug 4, 2010 by BrokenBunny
	Positive sharing (Preview) Those may remember me, I was crying aloud here a month ago about my misery of breaking up with my alcoholic fiancée. Here is some positive sharing for those who are in the middle of the crisis or dealing with the lost right now. He is/was a wonderful guy when he is sober or when he does not drink excessively...	Adabnu	1	819	Aug 4, 2010 by hotrod
	I love this board (Preview) I have only been a member since yesterday. I am so grateful to all of you who helped me with my dilemma. (alcoholic boyfriend) I was feeling so badly today that while at work, I kept this website minimized so I could look when I felt like i needed to. Thank you thank you thank you! I have found a place where I b...	Maxsmom	3	762	Aug 4, 2010 by Jennifer
	Surrounded by Alcoholics Everywhere I go... (Preview) New here. I want to say "I'm done." Over and done with the A's in my family. Does anybody ever just want to leave their AH/W?? Why not??? Why do we have to be the ones who bend over backward to stay sane when they make us crazy! The DUI's, the wrecked finances resulting in bankruptcy (and I'...	sunnydaze	9	1680	Aug 4, 2010 by sunnydaze
	Transference issues with my therapist..... (Preview) For the sake of honesty and because it's on my mind alot, I feel I should open up and spill my guts on this. I began therapy about two years ago...sex therapy to be exact to address some issues my wife complained about (and although she was part of the problem, I admit were true). I called a male therapist r...	mjhyankees	3	1748	Aug 4, 2010 by Mattie
	God Exists... (Preview) In the three seconds between what triggers me and how I respond to it. I got this echo at the morning meeting I attended. It was as if the speaker was reading my recovery journal because I heard his voice in tandem with my elder sponsor's voices. What an amazing gift because it remains the truth for me t...	Jerry F	9	849	Aug 4, 2010 by tlcate
	I give people too much power over me.... (Preview) This came up in therapy not to long ago.....my therapist remarked that I worry too much about what others think of me, I assume that they do or will think negatively of me, and that I tend to judge myself or my efforts based on this....i think she's right of course.... But I cant' help but compare my life to...	mjhyankees	4	1918	Aug 4, 2010 by tlcate
	Tryin to get on Track.... (Preview) Hi All... Here recenty I have been Covering some pretty big miles stones in my life, things have been happening so fast that at times I seem to forget the important stuff, and this week has been a HUGE Reminder of that... Yesterday My One & Only Child turned 13 and the thought of him growing up and leav...	Jozie	6	1160	Aug 4, 2010 by Andrea12
	In loving memory of my Mom (Preview) In loving memory of my mother: June 19, 1932- August 1, 1982. Hard to believe you've been gone this long. I was only 19. But those 19 years were the best. If I can be 1/10 as good as you were, I'm doing okay. Give my love to Dad & Tim. "Your heart was made of holidays. Your smile was made of dawn....	Karilynn	9	907	Aug 4, 2010 by Andrea12
	What is a Mom to do? (Preview) My son who is 25 has had issues with alcohol since late high school. He doesn't seem to know when to stop and keeps getting into trouble. The last incident was an accident where he fell on concrete and had to have 6 hours of reconstructive surgery on his face. He is back living with me now and has to pay me...	renee	4	1079	Aug 4, 2010 by Mobirdie
	Distracting myself from happiness...... (Preview) That phrase was a Freudian slip, that my therapist swears I uttered one day (I didn't remember saying it but have no reason to doubt her....even if she were to be wrong...it's a true statement). That is what I do....I focus on the negative stuff and don't give myself a chance to be happy......I even had...	mjhyankees	8	927	Aug 4, 2010 by kitty
	improvements (Preview) I'm keeping up with my meetings this time around and have been so much better with my thinking and attitude since. One thing I have noticed at the meetings nowdays. I catch myself smiling alot and can laugh about things. When I attended meetings years ago I was so serious and unhappy and I didn't underst...	buick23	6	795	Aug 4, 2010 by buick23
	Questions about Alanon face to face meeting last night (Preview) I would like to recant this post. I understand what you are all saying. Thanks -- Edited by Maize on Tuesday 3rd of August 2010 08:12:39 AM -- Edited by Maize on Tuesday 3rd of August 2010 05:59:26 PM	Maize	15	1583	Aug 3, 2010 by abbyal
	mother in law sober 43 years today! (Preview) a great lady and a great accomplishment. gotta love someone who has 10 kids, 15 grandkids and stayed sober and sane! she's aptly named Joy as for my husband, sober over 100 days now. hope it stays that way, every now and then my apprehension creeps in...	oscarmom	4	821	Aug 3, 2010 by Jerry F
	Trying to hang in there.... (Preview) My marriage is at a point where I'm actually grateful on the days there isn't a crisis and it proceeds normally. Of course normal in my marriage is zero affection form wife, zero help from wife and , zero common courtesy from the wife. The only saving grace is my daughter is wonderful and I love my litt...	mjhyankees	8	833	Aug 3, 2010 by flinn66
	Keeping my mouth shut? (Preview) Well, my AH whom I recently separated from (three weeks ago) asked me for money last week. He's got a stable career, has not provided any child support for the last two weeks (as I'm letting him fix the financialy situation before we get back together).....I did give him back two hundered dollars to cat...	RoseODAT	4	863	Aug 3, 2010 by RoseODAT
	maybe the problem is my thinking..... (Preview) Considering the idea that I wouldn't be any more happy or satisfied if I met my goals and dreams. Maybe they wouldn't be good enough once I had them. That's definately something I could believe about myself. I do need to appreciate what's around me and what I do have and can do now.	mjhyankees	11	1175	Aug 3, 2010 by tlcate
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.