The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I feel like going into my room closing the door and not come out.
I am trying so hard to hold it together since I put my AS out of my deceased mother's home for using it for a hang out for his drug use, and letting people come in the house that have no respect for the property or for him or for anyone for that matter.
I got a call from him yesterday, he sounded like he wasn't high and talked like the son I know and love very much. He is living from place to place and the fear factor I have for him is out the roof. I am second guessing myself.
I am going about my daily routine of work and taking care of my family, but inside I am dying.
Sorry for this downer, but I am having a very bad day.
Must be the day. ((((Dreams Over)))) Can I come and sit in your room with you? The toughest part is when they are sober and themselves, things can be so good. But when they use, So bad. You almost start to feel like you are bipolar with the wild mood shifts. You are in my thoughts and prayers today. Read some literature, that seems to help me some this a.m. and I am trying to be positive today and show a "brave" front. Peace to you.
I totally understand and sorry this is so hard for you My son also an addict, in jail rehab right now but knows coming back home is not an option, and he has burned his bridges with most of his friends so couch surfing isnt an option for him. We did tell him we would work to get him into a sober living home but if that doesnt work out he will literally be on the streets. As this is in the future youd think i would worry about it to much but i start obsessing on all the possibilties. And know that i have no control of the out come. It hurts so badly to see your child suffer it's almost unbearable some days I just try and keep busy and get my mind on other things. One minute at a time sometimes Blessings to you and son
Like Xeno said, One Minute at a Time. We know how much it hurts and how difficult it is, and we also know that you have to do this out of love for yourself and your child. Be strong and big hugs for you.
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Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable.
If you go into that room take HP with you. You made a decision that was best for you and your son at the time. Now you have placed your son is in HP's hands....that's the only place he can ever get better. You can't save him from himself. Give HP time.....he has a plan. Don't second guess yourself. I know it's hard, but stay out of HP's way. Focus on yourself and don't dwell on things you have no control over. Save your serenity and your peace of mind.
Sorry for your pain....It's hard to stick to the choices we make sometimes when dealing with addicts. I have been in my room with the door closed and it is not healthy and in fact I think I just got more depressed.
I will keep you and your son in my prayers..lets hope he sees the light and I pray you feel better.
I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. Boundaries are hard when we stick to them. Remember what you did you did for you and in the best interest of your family. If you can find it in you, it will help to get to a meeting. Sometimes just being with other people who are going through the same thing helps greatly. I know there were times when I thought that there was no way I was going to a meeting. Something (HP?) dragged me in there. While I didn't say much just being there was helpful. If you can't, then the chat room is always here for you.
You have turned him over to his HP. That's all you can do. Take it one moment at a time. Remember to be gentle on yourself. You're doing the best you can. That's all one can ask of oneself. Much love and blessings to you and your family.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
