Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

helpme08 · helpme08

It's been a very long time since I have been on this website. I went to my first face to face meeting this morning, so I have been thinking a lot about this program. I actually told my boss and coworkers that I had a doctor appointment, but went to an Alanon meeting. My story is that my husband is a type 1 di...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Conceptually, I understand how detachment works with respect to my AH. My question is more about how it works when it comes to talking/venting about my problems with loved ones. On the one hand, it helps to be open with people about my struggles. But on the other hand, when I talk about the challenge...

dollmininut · dollmininut

I met my husband over 25 years ago when he was actively drinking (we were not married then). I gave him a choice then it was me or the drugs and alcohol, he chose the latter. I told him to call me when he was clean and sober in 2 years (I waited for him). Well, he did, but he wasn't. We split for good and I went...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Hello, one thing I am struggling with as time passes by is my anger & frustration. I can't help but feel so angry towards my wife when she drinks. I'm trying to learn to hide it and trying to keep it under control. But I'm finding it is becoming harder and harder as time goes by. Even if my wife doesn't dr...

soozin12 · soozin12

I am just starting ALAnon and have the courage to change book, I just feel at a loss on how to even make any changes. I live with my AH and his 3 children (I have no children of my own). I just learned AH quit his job today-he "couldn't handle it" any more. That is all the explanation given and if I ev...

Hopeless · Hopeless

Nothing has really improved with my situation but I realize that I need to give Alanon 100% or order to work on myself..............I lost touch! I'm going to HAVE to start going to face to face it's the only way at this point! My A still is drinking and it's getting worse we are still NOT together but ...

oscarmom · oscarmom

from the alcoholic's perpective I mean Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. maybe its because over many years my husband, like most a's, made a career out of lying. most of it revolved around drinking of course. but what if there were dru...

hfrush · hfrush

Hello everyone! My name is Hilary I am 29 years old and I have a 1 year old son. I am the daughter of an alcoholic. My mother has drank from as far back as I can remember. When I was younger I can remember my mother sleeping all day long while I took care of my younger brother and the house, the only time she wo...

stephaniej · stephaniej

So my AH was home this weekend, and we had a lovely weekend. He had a few beers here and there, and I think I did a good job of not expressing any opinion, verbal or nonverbal, about him drinking. He was never drunk. Then this morning he took the dog for a walk before he had to leave again. While he was gone,...

tlcate · tlcate

Things have been a challenge lately - to say the least. Nothing "bad" - everyone is healthy and loving each other which is what is most important. Purchasing my first home and running into a lot of challenges - especially having the motivation and energy to keep pushing forward. So a frie...

shyspouse · shyspouse

Been married to AH for 25 years he is 146 days sober today. Needless to say our marriage had not been strong. I started working on me years ago when I tired of his failed attempts at recovery. This time he went through Hazelden and I attended the family week. I have been feeling great. So nice to have m...

Megthompson · Megthompson

Hi Everyone I have great news to share with you all. I came to this website a couple of months ago and explained there is no Al Anon where I live.So great news, I am getting one started here in Lusaka, Zambia, Africa.I am just so excited.The first meeting will be Friday 5th November.We have support from Al...

this too shall pass · this too shall pass

Hi, i have been feeling terrible for the last month... my AH has been sober and attending meetings for a little over a year now and i know how difficult it is for them.. when we go out he always tells me it is okay if i want to drink.. even gets me a drink often.. he doen't liek being at home even thoug now a days i...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I understand (even if I find it hard to practice) detachment, loving oneself, gratitude etc. But there are some questions that show for me, how I'll have to come to terms with some concepts at some point: 1. Where does ambition fit in? How can one be detached, grateful etc and still feel that drive. ...

Bambina10 · Bambina10

My AH has been very committed to sobriety and AA meetings for the last approx 2 months, attending 3 to 4 times a week. He looks healthy, self confident, almost cocky. He's been financially broke for the last 6 mos because of bad financial moves (consequence of his addiction). He still display...

Imogen421 · Imogen421

Hi all, I feel I'm "disappearing" into Al anon reading, reading on alcoholism and being online and on these boards searching, reading, searching, and posting as an escape or attempt to find an answer that isn't there (yet). Or like I want to find an exact replica of myself out there somewhe...

AnnaM · AnnaM

Hi, I would really like to find some double winner meetings in the OC area. Hoping to find some in HB, NB, CM, FV those kind of areas... Please share any info you have or if there is a website for this kind of info. Thank you! Anna -- Edited by AnnaM on Friday 17th of July 2009 12:23:17 PM

member922 · member922

I am finally learning to live and let live as far as my addict bf. I didn't think I could stay with him because I didn't agree with his lifestyle. I thought my only peace would come when he was out of my life. We do have some good times and I don't have to give that up. From my reading, I now understand that he...

maresie · maresie

My biological family was alcoholic. My mother stocked up alcohol for weeks and weeks before the holidays. My younger sister has pictures of my father totally smashed holidng a bottle. I know that environment set me up to tolerate and to be obsessed around alcoholics on the holidays. The ex AH rel...

JadeM · JadeM

As a newcomer, I really need to understand what my relationship is to the addicted person in my life, and why it is the way it is. I tried going to a meeting in NYC, but no matter how much I raised my hand, it was very clubby and I didn't get picked. I was desperate to share. Yet people would go on and on about t...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

And for sharing things that help and has helped each of you. I wish I good give each and everyone of you a great big ((((((hug))))). Wonderful, loving people here. Dreams

Holly09 · Holly09

I have not been here in a while, up until recently things have been good. 2 weeks ago my boyfriends dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor, they think it's his renal cancer has come back from 9 yrs ago. They can operate and hopefully get the whole tumor and he is very positive as so am I. My boyfriend on the o...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

My exAH called me a few days ago to tell me that he had been held at gun point by a group of men and women for two days. He gave me details of everything that happened. At one point, he said that several of the meanest men left to go do a killing in another country. The ones that stayed behind in his small coun...

blender_girl · blender_girl

I will be unavailable to chair this Friday's morning meeting - hopefully someone can take my place this week! Thanks! bg

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Haven't been here in ages....had to Let go and let god in sooo many areas, in order to try to find myself again. The struggles have been many and the rewards have been great...I had to go through it to get to it. No perfection here, just an imperfect girl still making progress. My apologizes for anyone...

lyndebi · lyndebi

Some of you know I have been fighting to keep my home since forever. Got yet another turn down for a loan mod. Was dumb in the first place. The mortgage company had it all set up, payments and all. the gal quit. They needed a signature from me the day I was in surgery, becuz i could not sign it, they canceled th...

Tracy · Tracy

Just want to share how good I am feeling today and it is all thanks to al anon and my HP. I was feeling so sorry for myself a day or two ago full of resentment and I did not like it. I though what al anon tool can I use to help me feel better. I went to a small bag I have containing al anon slogans, sayings etc and ask...

JadeM · JadeM

My ex is an addict/alcoholic with whom I lived (on and off because I left several times due to abuse)for 14 years seems incapable of running his own life, and doesn't seem to want to. He seems to have an ingrained expectectation that women---me that is---should take care of him, rescue him, and keep gi...

mdh · mdh

Things were going okay, then his self esteem grew and I support him in his endeavors, but I get no support in mine. I relayed this to him, and remind him he is hanging on a string. I have teenagers and do appreciate just the fact that he is around I have a little help. I remind him that it is the childre...

Wolfie · Wolfie

Good morning ladies. you too guys. Sorry haven't been here in quite some time. I had some internet problems. They have been fixed and now I'm back to get fixed some more. Of course I just volunterered to be DCM in my district (in the other fellowship) so I don't know how often I'll be here. But I love your po...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family))), The Great Pipers and I wanted to take a moment and wish you all a very HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Enjoy the day with family & friends, and all the little ghosts and goblins out there. If you see a black kitty it's Pipers waving to you in search of her own tricks or treats (or mousies). Rememb...

nmike · nmike

I am here, gone but not forgotten. My Internet connection at home is very intermittent since January. I write a response and it cuts out, I rewrite and lose it again. So I haven't posted. I don't do much personal work at work mainly because it is work and I am too busy. I miss you all. I hope you are all doing w...

Imogen421 · Imogen421

hello again, I'm working Al Anon and detaching, realizing Alcoholism is a disease. At the same time, I'm doing things proactively regarding the illness because I feel the relationship is worth trying for. So I asked my AF within the week to get a full evaluation with recommendations for treatment an...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

Depression has taken such a toll on me, I just wake up not wanting to get out of bed, I have lost about 20 lbs., I have no interest whatsoever in eating. I saw a counselor Friday because I have been having thoughts that dying would be easier than living like this. She wants me to go to a medical doctor and ge...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

As I thought, I'm feeling better the last two days. Nothing changed but my feelings. This depression comes and goes. I know I can feed into it or work against it. What helped? I think two good nights sleep in a row. Some exercise, went to a beach bonfire with some friends, spent time with my daughte...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I must be the whiniest person on this board. Sorry folks. Anyway I though I'd share some of my past....i dont' know why but it seems connected to why I'm having such a hard time today. Without going into great detail, I'm an ACOA, who got into therapy in the early 90's and was directed to Alanon by my thera...

Mercy · Mercy

Hello Again...so my bil went to detox and was only able to be there for the night. The room had no T.V. and there were 4 other men sharing the room. It broke my heart when my FIL told me that his friend's mother picked him up and brought him home. He is 26 years old and lives with his father who is also a AH. I have...

Megthompson · Megthompson

hi how do i get to the 12 step workboard?thanks. meg

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

As I wrote in my last post, my exAH does realize that the bizarre story of being held hostage at gun point in his home was all in his mind. I spoke to him about he is in the last stages of alcoholism and that I hope he gives detox/rehab serious consideration. He was straddling the fence. He shared with me s...

Holly09 · Holly09

HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE!!!

shimo · shimo

I am unable to chair the Monday a.m. Al-anon Meeting (November 1). Hoping someone will be able to step up for me. Thanks

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I feel down so much.....there are moments of contentment, but they dont' last. I realize it's my own fault, that I should be able to be happy regardless of what life is throwing at me but it doesn't sink in. Somehow I feel screwed all the time, like I"m not meant to be happy. I feel like Charlie Bro...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Life is rough today--I really have to slow down anymore! I want to take it slower but I am having trouble doing it! I will keep plugging away! I need to take some deep breaths & relax! I am hoping the day will go better later. Oops there goes my cell phone. Gotta go! Kathleen

Katy · Katy

I was just thinking how as my family grew up, I am talking my mum and my siblings, we really were very aware that as a one parent family we were made to feel somehow less than, and that stuck with me most of all the time I felt unhappy, when I started to feel better, it was when I stopped feeling less than, I didn...

dori711 · dori711

That's what I've been doing for many years. I've been hiding it because I'm ashamed. My mother doesn't know about my A husband's problem although she has cracked some jokes about it seeing him with her own eyes. My parents seldom consumed alcohol, it was saved only for special occasions or Chris...

kath · kath

I am posting this evening to talk about the way I started to handle a situation, and the way I finally surrendered the situation. This weekend is a big holiday for my AH. And I thought Halloween was for kids. just kidding, anyway I just wanted to note my progress. I saw him today and he was just whirling wi...

bud · bud

Overcoming my fear of hearing responses, it is important to me to set my mind straight, as I feel I am, once again, taking on someone else's problems. I am aware I am not for everyone and everyone is not for me. I am trying to sort out my hurt - it seems that I allowed someone to dump their anger on me... actu...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

I realized something earlier today--in spite of everything that is going on, in spite of my wife's continued drinking and depression, in spite of everything seemingly on the verge of falling apart and her potentially having a breakdown, in spite of us having to consider her going to rehab...in spit...

sunflowergirl · sunflowergirl

I feel so much better today, just thought I would say. I really really am so glad for this board and all of your responses! Thank you so much! I went home and my bf was there for me, he made sure I had dinner, he talked with me, we took a walk together, we watched a movie and both fell asleep doing so :) It was...

Katy · Katy

I used to think it was a destination we just arrived at and stayed there, and I thought it was a place and it just would happen lol, I was always just expsecting it to just show up because I deserved it, I was so full of concete, hadn't I earned my right to be happy, wasn't my suffering worse than anyone else's...

stephaniej · stephaniej

So about us: My A husband and I have been married for a year and a half. My second marriage, his first. I have two daughters from my first marriage, and my A husband and I have a 5-month old son together. We knew each other in junior high and high school, went our separate ways, and then reconnected a few...

shardin · shardin

I am recently separated from my AH and am very sad but very glad at the same time. We have a two year old that has seen and heard alot of arguing and then the last straw was physical where he was arrested. Our two year old was very scared and that is when I told my AH he had to go somewhere else, and away from us a...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am feeling better but I am only limited to so much time on this computer! I can truly say that my HP is working in my life! I am healing both physically & spiritually! I am only as sick as I allow myself to be! Recovery can really get me down but I am willing to hang in there until the miracle happens. I mea...

Katy · Katy

As some of you know, our son had started to go off the rails, so we have set clear boundaries, and enforce them when neccaserry, he wanted his motorbike last evening and I said no, not for general socialising now you have no job, he said I will go get drunk then, I said ok but you know the rules if you get so dru...

Suzannah · Suzannah

"...Beth Anne DeCiantis had to complete a 26-mile marathon in less than two hours and 45 minutes to qualify for the Olympics. She reached the final straight in 2hours43, with just two minutes left. Two hundred yards from the finish she stumbled and fell. Dazed, she stayed down for 20 seconds. Th...

sunflowergirl · sunflowergirl

I am not having a great day and am trying to turn it around. I guess I fell of the proverbial wagon and into my seductive depression again... That hole is there still and it is so easy to fall into, and so much harder to fight back out of. I know that happiness is an inside job. I know that I have to live in the...

abbyal · abbyal

I dont know if everyone is aware of the Pod casts that are available on our WSO site . they are amazing . U just click on to site pick the language of choice , click on pod casts and you are in a meeting . there are several topics being discussed this is perfect for new commers who wonder what goes on in our meeti...

MargaretK · MargaretK

HI I am new here. I am married to an alcoholic, have been for 39 years. He was clean and sober for about 10 years and then began drinking again about 7 years ago. As you can imagine, he has become progressively worse. We live in Beijing, China and he did find an AA meeting here, though it's inconvenient...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

this probably has to do with not being satisfied with myself (or anything else for that matter) but I've come to learn that I have this need to possess everything. Here is what I mean in a few examples: 1. I play guitar, am at least decent enough (and have a degree in music - another instrument though) to...

member922 · member922

Ok. I have not been very religious during my life, nor very spiritual. I have been doing a lot of the Al-Anon reading and I seem to be struggling with the higher power stuff. How do you realize a higher power? I guess I don't really understand this. I am trying to "just live" and let happen....

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Going Crazy...... (Preview) It's been a very long time since I have been on this website. I went to my first face to face meeting this morning, so I have been thinking a lot about this program. I actually told my boss and coworkers that I had a doctor appointment, but went to an Alanon meeting. My story is that my husband is a type 1 di...	helpme08	3	1045	Nov 2, 2010 by Jerry F
	Question about Detaching (Preview) Conceptually, I understand how detachment works with respect to my AH. My question is more about how it works when it comes to talking/venting about my problems with loved ones. On the one hand, it helps to be open with people about my struggles. But on the other hand, when I talk about the challenge...	stephaniej	4	491	Nov 2, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Don't want to go on (Preview) I met my husband over 25 years ago when he was actively drinking (we were not married then). I gave him a choice then it was me or the drugs and alcohol, he chose the latter. I told him to call me when he was clean and sober in 2 years (I waited for him). Well, he did, but he wasn't. We split for good and I went...	dollmininut	12	979	Nov 2, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	Having a hard time with my anger & frustration (Preview) Hello, one thing I am struggling with as time passes by is my anger & frustration. I can't help but feel so angry towards my wife when she drinks. I'm trying to learn to hide it and trying to keep it under control. But I'm finding it is becoming harder and harder as time goes by. Even if my wife doesn't dr...	usedtobeanyer	13	804	Nov 2, 2010 by oklahoma momof5
	What to do when AH says "pick me up beer" (Preview) I am just starting ALAnon and have the courage to change book, I just feel at a loss on how to even make any changes. I live with my AH and his 3 children (I have no children of my own). I just learned AH quit his job today-he "couldn't handle it" any more. That is all the explanation given and if I ev...	soozin12	8	889	Nov 2, 2010 by SteppingUp
	I'm back.... (Preview) Nothing has really improved with my situation but I realize that I need to give Alanon 100% or order to work on myself..............I lost touch! I'm going to HAVE to start going to face to face it's the only way at this point! My A still is drinking and it's getting worse we are still NOT together but ...	Hopeless	5	620	Nov 2, 2010 by Hopeless
	anyone else dislike step 9? (Preview) from the alcoholic's perpective I mean Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. maybe its because over many years my husband, like most a's, made a career out of lying. most of it revolved around drinking of course. but what if there were dru...	oscarmom	10	1155	Nov 2, 2010 by kitty
	Hello All (Preview) Hello everyone! My name is Hilary I am 29 years old and I have a 1 year old son. I am the daughter of an alcoholic. My mother has drank from as far back as I can remember. When I was younger I can remember my mother sleeping all day long while I took care of my younger brother and the house, the only time she wo...	hfrush	5	471	Nov 2, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	Having a hard time (Preview) So my AH was home this weekend, and we had a lovely weekend. He had a few beers here and there, and I think I did a good job of not expressing any opinion, verbal or nonverbal, about him drinking. He was never drunk. Then this morning he took the dog for a walk before he had to leave again. While he was gone,...	stephaniej	5	801	Nov 2, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	This is not "turn yourself into a robot" program (Preview) Things have been a challenge lately - to say the least. Nothing "bad" - everyone is healthy and loving each other which is what is most important. Purchasing my first home and running into a lot of challenges - especially having the motivation and energy to keep pushing forward. So a frie...	tlcate	10	832	Nov 2, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	New - need support (Preview) Been married to AH for 25 years he is 146 days sober today. Needless to say our marriage had not been strong. I started working on me years ago when I tired of his failed attempts at recovery. This time he went through Hazelden and I attended the family week. I have been feeling great. So nice to have m...	shyspouse	5	461	Nov 2, 2010 by Cloudsea
	VERY EXCITING AND GREAT NEWS, AL ANON IN AFRICA (Preview) Hi Everyone I have great news to share with you all. I came to this website a couple of months ago and explained there is no Al Anon where I live.So great news, I am getting one started here in Lusaka, Zambia, Africa.I am just so excited.The first meeting will be Friday 5th November.We have support from Al...	Megthompson	7	586	Nov 2, 2010 by Megthompson
	I drink... (Preview) Hi, i have been feeling terrible for the last month... my AH has been sober and attending meetings for a little over a year now and i know how difficult it is for them.. when we go out he always tells me it is okay if i want to drink.. even gets me a drink often.. he doen't liek being at home even thoug now a days i...	this too shall pass	10	1242	Nov 2, 2010 by this too shall pass
	Some questions I'm going to have to resolve....... (Preview) I understand (even if I find it hard to practice) detachment, loving oneself, gratitude etc. But there are some questions that show for me, how I'll have to come to terms with some concepts at some point: 1. Where does ambition fit in? How can one be detached, grateful etc and still feel that drive. ...	mjhyankees	7	564	Nov 1, 2010 by mjhyankees
	Did I trigger my AH relapse..? (Preview) My AH has been very committed to sobriety and AA meetings for the last approx 2 months, attending 3 to 4 times a week. He looks healthy, self confident, almost cocky. He's been financially broke for the last 6 mos because of bad financial moves (consequence of his addiction). He still display...	Bambina10	8	516	Nov 1, 2010 by abbyal
	getting "addicted" / obsessed with alanon (and other) concerns? (Preview) Hi all, I feel I'm "disappearing" into Al anon reading, reading on alcoholism and being online and on these boards searching, reading, searching, and posting as an escape or attempt to find an answer that isn't there (yet). Or like I want to find an exact replica of myself out there somewhe...	Imogen421	9	734	Nov 1, 2010 by lyndebi
	LOOKING FOR DOUBLE WINNER MEETINGS (Preview) Hi, I would really like to find some double winner meetings in the OC area. Hoping to find some in HB, NB, CM, FV those kind of areas... Please share any info you have or if there is a website for this kind of info. Thank you! Anna -- Edited by AnnaM on Friday 17th of July 2009 12:23:17 PM	AnnaM	8	8931	Nov 1, 2010 by Bev4Hope
	Learning detachment, I love it!! (Preview) I am finally learning to live and let live as far as my addict bf. I didn't think I could stay with him because I didn't agree with his lifestyle. I thought my only peace would come when he was out of my life. We do have some good times and I don't have to give that up. From my reading, I now understand that he...	member922	5	472	Nov 1, 2010 by member922
	the holidays with an alcoholic (Preview) My biological family was alcoholic. My mother stocked up alcohol for weeks and weeks before the holidays. My younger sister has pictures of my father totally smashed holidng a bottle. I know that environment set me up to tolerate and to be obsessed around alcoholics on the holidays. The ex AH rel...	maresie	8	933	Nov 1, 2010 by Ness
	I'm a Newcomer to Alanon; This is 12-Step Right? (Preview) As a newcomer, I really need to understand what my relationship is to the addicted person in my life, and why it is the way it is. I tried going to a meeting in NYC, but no matter how much I raised my hand, it was very clubby and I didn't get picked. I was desperate to share. Yet people would go on and on about t...	JadeM	6	475	Nov 1, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	Thank You All For Caring... (Preview) And for sharing things that help and has helped each of you. I wish I good give each and everyone of you a great big ((((((hug))))). Wonderful, loving people here. Dreams	DreamsOver	3	737	Nov 1, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	that bad place keeps creeping up on me (Preview) I have not been here in a while, up until recently things have been good. 2 weeks ago my boyfriends dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor, they think it's his renal cancer has come back from 9 yrs ago. They can operate and hopefully get the whole tumor and he is very positive as so am I. My boyfriend on the o...	Holly09	5	404	Nov 1, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	Has Anything Like This Happened to Your Alcoholic? (Preview) My exAH called me a few days ago to tell me that he had been held at gun point by a group of men and women for two days. He gave me details of everything that happened. At one point, he said that several of the meanest men left to go do a killing in another country. The ones that stayed behind in his small coun...	GailMichelle	9	884	Nov 1, 2010 by blender_girl
	Friday Morning Meeting - 11/5/2010 - Need someone to chair (Preview) I will be unavailable to chair this Friday's morning meeting - hopefully someone can take my place this week! Thanks! bg	blender_girl	0	378	Nov 1, 2010 by blender_girl
	It's working me... (Preview) Haven't been here in ages....had to Let go and let god in sooo many areas, in order to try to find myself again. The struggles have been many and the rewards have been great...I had to go through it to get to it. No perfection here, just an imperfect girl still making progress. My apologizes for anyone...	shellyj123	9	456	Nov 1, 2010 by Katy
	A little fear crept in (Preview) Some of you know I have been fighting to keep my home since forever. Got yet another turn down for a loan mod. Was dumb in the first place. The mortgage company had it all set up, payments and all. the gal quit. They needed a signature from me the day I was in surgery, becuz i could not sign it, they canceled th...	lyndebi	8	889	Nov 1, 2010 by Katy
	I do matter (Preview) Just want to share how good I am feeling today and it is all thanks to al anon and my HP. I was feeling so sorry for myself a day or two ago full of resentment and I did not like it. I though what al anon tool can I use to help me feel better. I went to a small bag I have containing al anon slogans, sayings etc and ask...	Tracy	4	605	Nov 1, 2010 by Jerry F
	Addict Loved One Who Harasses for Money (Preview) My ex is an addict/alcoholic with whom I lived (on and off because I left several times due to abuse)for 14 years seems incapable of running his own life, and doesn't seem to want to. He seems to have an ingrained expectectation that women---me that is---should take care of him, rescue him, and keep gi...	JadeM	4	855	Nov 1, 2010 by Jerry F
	New Here, I am dealing with an past AH who is attending AA for 1 year, I need support besides him. (Preview) Things were going okay, then his self esteem grew and I support him in his endeavors, but I get no support in mine. I relayed this to him, and remind him he is hanging on a string. I have teenagers and do appreciate just the fact that he is around I have a little help. I remind him that it is the childre...	mdh	5	557	Nov 1, 2010 by Bambina10
	Just Checking In (Preview) Good morning ladies. you too guys. Sorry haven't been here in quite some time. I had some internet problems. They have been fixed and now I'm back to get fixed some more. Of course I just volunterered to be DCM in my district (in the other fellowship) so I don't know how often I'll be here. But I love your po...	Wolfie	5	553	Nov 1, 2010 by Andrea12
	Happy Halloween! (Preview) ((((Family))), The Great Pipers and I wanted to take a moment and wish you all a very HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Enjoy the day with family & friends, and all the little ghosts and goblins out there. If you see a black kitty it's Pipers waving to you in search of her own tricks or treats (or mousies). Rememb...	Karilynn	2	377	Oct 31, 2010 by RLC
	I am here! (Preview) I am here, gone but not forgotten. My Internet connection at home is very intermittent since January. I write a response and it cuts out, I rewrite and lose it again. So I haven't posted. I don't do much personal work at work mainly because it is work and I am too busy. I miss you all. I hope you are all doing w...	nmike	3	430	Oct 31, 2010 by Andrea12
	do interventions work, can treatment work? (Preview) hello again, I'm working Al Anon and detaching, realizing Alcoholism is a disease. At the same time, I'm doing things proactively regarding the illness because I feel the relationship is worth trying for. So I asked my AF within the week to get a full evaluation with recommendations for treatment an...	Imogen421	10	827	Oct 31, 2010 by abbyal
	Feelling Depression........... (Preview) Depression has taken such a toll on me, I just wake up not wanting to get out of bed, I have lost about 20 lbs., I have no interest whatsoever in eating. I saw a counselor Friday because I have been having thoughts that dying would be easier than living like this. She wants me to go to a medical doctor and ge...	DreamsOver	6	824	Oct 31, 2010 by xeno59
	As expected. (Preview) As I thought, I'm feeling better the last two days. Nothing changed but my feelings. This depression comes and goes. I know I can feed into it or work against it. What helped? I think two good nights sleep in a row. Some exercise, went to a beach bonfire with some friends, spent time with my daughte...	mjhyankees	2	398	Oct 31, 2010 by xeno59
	About me.... (Preview) I must be the whiniest person on this board. Sorry folks. Anyway I though I'd share some of my past....i dont' know why but it seems connected to why I'm having such a hard time today. Without going into great detail, I'm an ACOA, who got into therapy in the early 90's and was directed to Alanon by my thera...	mjhyankees	3	376	Oct 31, 2010 by xeno59
	BIL never completed detox and know his father thinks it is better if he just drank (Preview) Hello Again...so my bil went to detox and was only able to be there for the night. The room had no T.V. and there were 4 other men sharing the room. It broke my heart when my FIL told me that his friend's mother picked him up and brought him home. He is 26 years old and lives with his father who is also a AH. I have...	Mercy	5	722	Oct 31, 2010 by Tracy
	question how do i get to 12 step work board? (Preview) hi how do i get to the 12 step workboard?thanks. meg	Megthompson	1	327	Oct 31, 2010 by tlcate
	Update on My exAH's Bizarre Story (Preview) As I wrote in my last post, my exAH does realize that the bizarre story of being held hostage at gun point in his home was all in his mind. I spoke to him about he is in the last stages of alcoholism and that I hope he gives detox/rehab serious consideration. He was straddling the fence. He shared with me s...	GailMichelle	5	852	Oct 31, 2010 by GailMichelle
	SPOOKY (Preview) HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE!!!	Holly09	0	325	Oct 31, 2010 by Holly09
	Monday a.m. Al-Anon Mtg (Preview) I am unable to chair the Monday a.m. Al-anon Meeting (November 1). Hoping someone will be able to step up for me. Thanks	shimo	0	290	Oct 31, 2010 by shimo
	I'm so tired of feeling like this. (Preview) I feel down so much.....there are moments of contentment, but they dont' last. I realize it's my own fault, that I should be able to be happy regardless of what life is throwing at me but it doesn't sink in. Somehow I feel screwed all the time, like I"m not meant to be happy. I feel like Charlie Bro...	mjhyankees	7	903	Oct 30, 2010 by mjhyankees
	I am so rushed today... (Preview) Life is rough today--I really have to slow down anymore! I want to take it slower but I am having trouble doing it! I will keep plugging away! I need to take some deep breaths & relax! I am hoping the day will go better later. Oops there goes my cell phone. Gotta go! Kathleen	Hoot Nanny	1	412	Oct 30, 2010 by member922
	Stigma and labels! (Preview) I was just thinking how as my family grew up, I am talking my mum and my siblings, we really were very aware that as a one parent family we were made to feel somehow less than, and that stuck with me most of all the time I felt unhappy, when I started to feel better, it was when I stopped feeling less than, I didn...	Katy	3	799	Oct 30, 2010 by xeno59
	Hiding the A's drinking problem (Preview) That's what I've been doing for many years. I've been hiding it because I'm ashamed. My mother doesn't know about my A husband's problem although she has cracked some jokes about it seeing him with her own eyes. My parents seldom consumed alcohol, it was saved only for special occasions or Chris...	dori711	10	840	Oct 30, 2010 by dori711
	Just want to share (Preview) I am posting this evening to talk about the way I started to handle a situation, and the way I finally surrendered the situation. This weekend is a big holiday for my AH. And I thought Halloween was for kids. just kidding, anyway I just wanted to note my progress. I saw him today and he was just whirling wi...	kath	4	731	Oct 30, 2010 by kath
	My bad? Reality check needed, please. (Preview) Overcoming my fear of hearing responses, it is important to me to set my mind straight, as I feel I am, once again, taking on someone else's problems. I am aware I am not for everyone and everyone is not for me. I am trying to sort out my hurt - it seems that I allowed someone to dump their anger on me... actu...	bud	8	812	Oct 30, 2010 by bud
	Just realized something--I am feeling GREAT! (Preview) I realized something earlier today--in spite of everything that is going on, in spite of my wife's continued drinking and depression, in spite of everything seemingly on the verge of falling apart and her potentially having a breakdown, in spite of us having to consider her going to rehab...in spit...	usedtobeanyer	12	818	Oct 30, 2010 by Bambina10
	Everyday is a winding road... (Preview) I feel so much better today, just thought I would say. I really really am so glad for this board and all of your responses! Thank you so much! I went home and my bf was there for me, he made sure I had dinner, he talked with me, we took a walk together, we watched a movie and both fell asleep doing so :) It was...	sunflowergirl	2	472	Oct 30, 2010 by Jerry F
	Happiness! (Preview) I used to think it was a destination we just arrived at and stayed there, and I thought it was a place and it just would happen lol, I was always just expsecting it to just show up because I deserved it, I was so full of concete, hadn't I earned my right to be happy, wasn't my suffering worse than anyone else's...	Katy	5	685	Oct 29, 2010 by mjhyankees
	New Here, with a basic, general question (Preview) So about us: My A husband and I have been married for a year and a half. My second marriage, his first. I have two daughters from my first marriage, and my A husband and I have a 5-month old son together. We knew each other in junior high and high school, went our separate ways, and then reconnected a few...	stephaniej	11	766	Oct 29, 2010 by mdh
	Separated from my AH (Preview) I am recently separated from my AH and am very sad but very glad at the same time. We have a two year old that has seen and heard alot of arguing and then the last straw was physical where he was arrested. Our two year old was very scared and that is when I told my AH he had to go somewhere else, and away from us a...	shardin	6	807	Oct 29, 2010 by mdh
	I am feeling better... (Preview) I am feeling better but I am only limited to so much time on this computer! I can truly say that my HP is working in my life! I am healing both physically & spiritually! I am only as sick as I allow myself to be! Recovery can really get me down but I am willing to hang in there until the miracle happens. I mea...	Hoot Nanny	1	420	Oct 29, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	He said sorry mum, result! (Preview) As some of you know, our son had started to go off the rails, so we have set clear boundaries, and enforce them when neccaserry, he wanted his motorbike last evening and I said no, not for general socialising now you have no job, he said I will go get drunk then, I said ok but you know the rules if you get so dru...	Katy	1	546	Oct 29, 2010 by Jerry F
	Get up and keep going, don't give up (Preview) "...Beth Anne DeCiantis had to complete a 26-mile marathon in less than two hours and 45 minutes to qualify for the Olympics. She reached the final straight in 2hours43, with just two minutes left. Two hundred yards from the finish she stumbled and fell. Dazed, she stayed down for 20 seconds. Th...	Suzannah	1	889	Oct 29, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	Fallen off the cusp today... (Preview) I am not having a great day and am trying to turn it around. I guess I fell of the proverbial wagon and into my seductive depression again... That hole is there still and it is so easy to fall into, and so much harder to fight back out of. I know that happiness is an inside job. I know that I have to live in the...	sunflowergirl	11	777	Oct 29, 2010 by sunflowergirl
	Something for everyone (Preview) I dont know if everyone is aware of the Pod casts that are available on our WSO site . they are amazing . U just click on to site pick the language of choice , click on pod casts and you are in a meeting . there are several topics being discussed this is perfect for new commers who wonder what goes on in our meeti...	abbyal	8	851	Oct 29, 2010 by Wolfie
	New here (Preview) HI I am new here. I am married to an alcoholic, have been for 39 years. He was clean and sober for about 10 years and then began drinking again about 7 years ago. As you can imagine, he has become progressively worse. We live in Beijing, China and he did find an AA meeting here, though it's inconvenient...	MargaretK	9	715	Oct 29, 2010 by MargaretK
	the need to possess......... (Preview) this probably has to do with not being satisfied with myself (or anything else for that matter) but I've come to learn that I have this need to possess everything. Here is what I mean in a few examples: 1. I play guitar, am at least decent enough (and have a degree in music - another instrument though) to...	mjhyankees	12	936	Oct 29, 2010 by tlcate
	Higher Power Question (Preview) Ok. I have not been very religious during my life, nor very spiritual. I have been doing a lot of the Al-Anon reading and I seem to be struggling with the higher power stuff. How do you realize a higher power? I guess I don't really understand this. I am trying to "just live" and let happen....	member922	13	2181	Oct 29, 2010 by troyc
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.