Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

member922 · member922

Hi all. I went to a meeting last night with a younger gf of mine. It was a little overwhelming for her, which made it so for me as well. I was a bit more emotional than usual. Man, was I wanting to cry every second of that meeting. I am actually crying right now lol. A man from the meeting came up to us in the p...

flopadopilus · flopadopilus

I would have never guessed this would ever happen. I have been trying to get her to come with me to Al-anon and we already go to the same bible study group. Her AH has cheated recently and I knew she was having a hard time, but to get this call tonight makes me so furious with this disease!!!! Such a beautif...

MAR2011 · MAR2011

My fiance, alcoholic, our 2m old daughter and I live in my moms house. My mom knows he's an alcoholic (hard to hide) and the things he does (doesnt come home some nights and doesnt answer his phone so he can drink). Last week was her last straw. She said if he does it again, he's out. No if's and's or but's ab...

MAR2011 · MAR2011

I feel like im flooding the boards but my mind is going a mile a minute. I know it's a possibility that I will end up, unfortunately, needing to leave my fiance. I do not want my daughter growing up around it or thinking it's ok and if nothing changes... it may have to happen. Truth be told, I cannot imagine...

KLotus · KLotus

Hi Everyone, With much gratitude, I report that my alcoholic husband finally came to an emotional surrender - with many apologies and tears, and last week I took him (voluntarily) to an inpatient recovery program. Recap: I and my one-year-old child have been living with my in-laws for two months no...

sierramorningstar · sierramorningstar

mm....I dont know i guess i just need some perspective. My fiancee just left me seven months pregnant, the day after we signed a lease on a new place and left me hanging with a thousand dollars worth of orders to fill in our mutual business, that i am not capable of filling myself...some of them with depos...

Samsgram · Samsgram

First of all, I personally feel hurt and betrayed by my 7 yr old grandaughter. I pretty much do everything for her as most of you have heard. When she is with her mother or her grandfather I get anxious because they let her stay up late and there just are no boundaries. I worry about how far she goes when she i...

Any Missouri/Joplin members? · Jerry F

Constant stream of thoughts and prayers going your way...Be careful!! (((hugs)))

youfoundme · youfoundme

This weekend my bf was away at a program for getting a DUI a year ago. It was so nice to hear from him, he was sober the whole time. We talked, but I also did a lot for me. I kept my focus on me and my kids. We laughed a lot and had some quiet time too. I spent some time at a friend's with her kids too, we made a big...

Jozie · Jozie

What a Month :0) I Currently Have so Many things going on right now, that I at times Catch myself just staring off into space Thanking HP for All the Blessings that have been Laid before me... I have found that when I am Down, it is by choice... And since I Turned My Frown Upside Down WOW has HP really opened m...

pineapple · pineapple

Well, ah who drinks every day managed to not drink all day on Friday for my birthday. But he's made up for it, now on day two of a binge. I've tried TCOMF, pretending that he isn't even here, as in reality, he isn't. His body may be here, drunk or passed out, but HE is not. I've been doing my own things, working...

atheos · atheos

I think I've burned myself out. It started five years ago when I was 19, trying to single-handedly care for my schizophrenic sister while mom and dad were still in denial about her condition. Although mom and dad are now helping her and not in denial any more, I still have often felt stressed out by her (l...

kitty5 · kitty5

Hello Everyone: I'm attending Alanon meetings and trying very hard to understand things - it's very overwhelming. My father was an alcoholic-he's deceased now 5 years. I'm a non-alcoholic married to a non-alcoholic for 20 years and very happy with with husband. I have a male friend who I do lov...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I had the most amazing Saturday~the best in months, and the only explanation I can find is that I "stopped" to smell the roses...the irony being I didn't stop all day long! We had our first sunshine filled day here in weeks it seemed, and when I woke up and saw the sunshine, I decided to soak i...

alexmaui · alexmaui

My AH is temporarily sober (who knows for how long) But my family can't seem to accept him, anymore. I moved out because of the chaos and stress his drinking brought to my life...but he was never angry or abusive to anyone...except for some unfortunate late night calls. He has been uninvited to family e...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Dear MIP family - and you are very dear to me. I am struggling at the moment with a very sick AH who is not eating - I can get my hand round his upper arm - and has a very damaged liver, gastric tract, etc.(for those who don't know - I have been married to AH for 39 years + and he has been alcohol dependant for the la...

maresie · maresie

One of my housemates has started dating her boss. They always did have an intense relationship. There were a lot of lines blurred in there. I feel uncomfortable because of course all my relationships (and most of them disasters) were started at warp speed. If someone wanted to date, get to know me...

danielle0516 · danielle0516

So my mom comes over today to drop off some flowers. She starts talking about random stuff then the conversations turns to how she feels as a result of me not telling her what's going on in my life and, in particular, how I'm not sharing with her what I do and do not tell my daughter about what's going on with...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I'm not kidding when I say that my grass is 4 feet tall in some places around my yard - places I can't reach with the riding mower. When I walk around my yard I fight dispair because its SO much work - every single step around the yard shows me things I have to try to get done. I used to have a handle on it, before I...

surfingmaestro · surfingmaestro

Hi Everyone, I feel better when I post here, much the same way I feel better when I share at a meeting. So right now I'm writing just to make the fingers do something and get the gobidilgluck out of my head. As I have shared before, my wife is 12 months sober from alcohol and benzos this coming Wednesday. ...

tommyecat · tommyecat

.......read a sign in a local state park..... D O N O T F E E D T H E A N I M A L S ...You will DESTROY their natural instinct for survival The sign reminds me of myself before I walked into the rooms of Alanon. Enabling, doing for others rather than myself, covering up lies, protecting loved ones fr...

member922 · member922

So I haven't spoken with the ABF in almost 2 wks. We have decided on a 1 month break. I am wishing that he would contact me at least to say hi. Just general conversation. I know I don't want him to and I appreciate his respect of the boundary. I am doing so well without him, not looking for emails from him s...

JustJill · JustJill

My fiance went to his moms to spend his weekend with his 11 year old son. They had usually came here, but since last weekend was a bad weekend of his drinking I asked him to please go there. I am tired of the drinking, the added flavoring, the need to drink to get work done. Actually I am just tired. He called l...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Tonight, my ex called me. He was down. He had a cold, so I wasn't certain if he meant he was down because he was physically ill. Then, he said that he was down because he lost his job, his house, and wife. That was the exact order. I've heard that for men the job is the hardest to loose. What does one say...

RLC · RLC

Sending you birthday wishes to Guatemala. I hope you have a great day, eat a lot of cake.........and don't get mad at me for telling the world. LOL. Happy Birthday HUGS, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Friday 20th of May 2011 02:26:38 AM

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

my a b/f thats what he will ever be untill i cut it off completely,i live in my own home me and my son i pay my own bills and take care of my 24 y/o son whom has several dr appt.due to severe sleep apnea and low oxygen levels he weighs 404 lbs,so yes ive got my hands full everythings in my name (thank gosh).so my a b...

oldergal · oldergal

Kinda confused about this, I am not sure what it means to have boundaries, but yet don't have expectations? Can anyone explain this. It seems to me if you have boundaries, these are like expectations....???

kitty5 · kitty5

I have a male friend who is an alcoholic. He is very nice but when he drinks which is all the time I just can't be there to see it or be part of it as I am an adult child of an alcoholic (deceased father) so it brings up horrific memories for me. I love my alcoholic friend as a brother and it kills me to see him se...

RLC · RLC

(((To MY MIP Family))) I posted Monday about a dear friend who was hit head on by a drunk driver early this past Sunday morning and was listed in critical condition. I would like to report that he is out of the woods and was taken out intensive care earlier today. I talked with him late this afternoon. He is...

lyn46 · lyn46

Well, I managed to get away from my AH. But he isn't leaving me alone. He keeps calling 100 times a day asking if I am going to commit to supporting him if he goes to a program. My thought is, been there done that. It didn't work. Then he threatens to leave the hospital he is at..(he checked himself into a phyc...

RLC · RLC

Some of you know I am in the ladies apparel wholesale business. I buy 90% of my apparel from one company. The owner and I have been the best of friends, more like brothers for 15 years. He is like family a wonderful carring man in his early 40's with a wife and two children. We value and respect each oth...

youfoundme · youfoundme

I am so glad I went. My bf had an interview yesterday and proceeded to drink into a black out afterwards...so around 5:30 we got home, ate and I left to take my son to karate and get me to the meeting. Around 7pm the meeting began. HE called me right at 7, my phone was off so I didn't hear it (thank the gods) a...

tendo · tendo

My girlfriend is an alcoholic and has been sober for a couple years now. I love her very, very much. Right now we're in a rocky place and she's going thru some stuff she won't even try explaining to me because it has to do with being an alcoholic. I don't know what's going on inside her head. Anyway, last nig...

Aimee · Aimee

Good morning! I would love to hear your experiences with step 7 (and I guess step 6 as well). When you did step 5 with your sponsor and then went into that prayer meditation time after when you " Humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings" what happened? Did it happen right away? Were you entire...

member922 · member922

So since taking the month of no contact with the abf (wk and a half so far), I have had 2 male friends that I haven't spoken to in awhile actually ask me to go to coffee or something. One of them even suggested dinner. They both acted really complimentary and happy to catch up. The one actually planned to g...

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

I first stumbled into the Al-Anon rooms in January. I'm new to the miracles the program can bring to my thinking. Last night, AH was... well, an alcoholic with all of the rights, responsibilities and privileges of that title. AH got angry and left. He was only gone about 45 minutes. Now, the miracl...

Debilyn · Debilyn

If you want to see the latest pictures you are welcome to go to my facebook under Debra Potter. hugs,deb

dragonflys · dragonflys

I am really having a hard time with something. I am not really sure how to explain but here goes. My husband has been pot free for just over a year. He has not worked since my daughter was born in late 2006. He started school before he went to rehab but had to drop his classes while in rehab. The past year he has...

JustWantToUnderstand · JustWantToUnderstand

I haven't been to alanon meetings before but recent events have pushed me to realize I need to talk with others who may be experiencing the same things I am. I have a dear friend who I've known for almost 20 years that was recently hospitalized because she couldn't stand up. She and I speak on the phone re...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Last night at a meeting, the topic was on listening. One member shared something that I never heard before. She said when she notices that she might be talking too much, she remembers the acronym WAIT. Some members in the know, laughed. But then newbies, me included, were perplexed. Then she e...

youfoundme · youfoundme

Didn't get to go to the meeting last night, but I am going to the one tonight. My bf drank again yesterday, into another blackout. He fell asleep after work, and I had to take my older son for his doctor appointment. So we did that and when we returned home, my bf was still asleep. I made supper and he cam...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I spent some time the past two days gathering up things for a yard sale, and in the midst of cleaning, I found my old God box (I have several)...I decided to stop the decluttering and gathering and read the notes in my God box from the past year and was amazed to find that everyone had been answered... i...

tommyecat · tommyecat

I have a scenerio for those of you that have been active in the Alanon/AA program awhile. There is a person in my homegroup that attended a few meetings of adult children in the late 60's. This person said they didnt have a sponsor, nor attended meetings of any kind on a regular basis. This member who...

atheos · atheos

...as I shared at my F2F meeting today, I am the kind of person who would start off a call to 911 with "I'm sorry to bother you, but my house is on fire"... I'm really not good at asking for things I need. Recently I posted here about asking a manager at work not to schedule me for overtime on a certa...

Dawny · Dawny

ok, so i have an earlier post that my A relased, but i didnt clarify what he relapsd on. He went to rehab for drinking and pain pills and what ever he could get his hands on. He didnt drink and he says he is really solid and wont ever drink, but a guy left out a line of speed, he says he ignored it for a long time......

Jozie · Jozie

Denial for me is HUGE .... I sit back and realized today after reading "Hope for Today" that I still Suffer Alot from Denial... I have learned to say.. "I'm Good, No Worries" when I am Dieing inside, I am good at Denying myself Happiness, & Joy alot of the times, because I Have n...

DadtoCandE · DadtoCandE

My wife maintains a group of friends that she has completely vilified me too. All the problems she was having at work or missing social engagements with these friends due to alcohol were attributed to the stress I was causing her. I started fantasizing about her step nine. Pretty funny actually...

Latinarose · Latinarose

My son's drug of choice is meth, he has just been released from prison for foolishness associated with poor decision making while under the influence. He is 39 YO he has been in and out of jail for over 25 years because of his continued use. Once again before his release I wrote that if he was to live with m...

tarmale · tarmale

Hi everyone. I have a friend who is 41 and has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. She grew up in an abusive household but is now married with children. At first her drinking was kind of social and we all did it. Now, however, it's to the point of her blacking out, losing her memory, driving d...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

I like the reading in One Day at a Time from yesterday. Part of it says: '"The hardest thing for me to learn,' said a member at an Al-Anon meeting, 'is to stop imagining that I can figure out why my husband acts the way he does. Automatically almost, I jump to conclusions about his activities and hi...

juliakessler · juliakessler

I know Im hiding but, i got him out and i don't want to see or talk to him because i know im not strong enough to say no to him, so, Im hiding, from him from the world, from everyonr and evrything, I feel like im just waiting for something to bad to happen but if i stick my head in the sand ill be ok for now i just want...

Rora · Rora

After a 2.5 yr separation, my exaH and I recently tried on a short reconciliation after his 3 months in rehab. I really thought a miracle had taken place. We were communicating. We were sifting through all the hurts, all the fear, all the damage. We were understanding of each others places. It was...

youfoundme · youfoundme

So I have been working really hard on my own, since I've only gotten to one meeting, I didn't get a sponsor yet. This board has helped and listening to other posts about how to handle things in the mean time until I get a sponsor. Anyway, a few days ago my bf drank, and I didn't react. Things remained calm...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

I thought I would share a story about how I got introduced to Al Anon and my wife got introduced to AA. It's only recently that I've reflected on this and all that happened and how it is so obvious that my higher power was in control, although I never would have guessed it at the time. About a year or so ago, my...

maddon · maddon

My father in law is an alcoholic and has been since my husband was a late teenager (after the mother died). he is now in his 70's. There are only two children one daughter and my husband. We now live beside the father. My sister in law lives away but takes responsibility for his shopping, his housekee...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Went to see family doctor with AH this am. He has had a week in hospital but began drinking again the minute he came out. At least he didn't try to tell her any lies about drinking although he did underestimate the quantity. She told him he is killing himself and asked if he wanted to die. He said no but perh...

Dawny · Dawny

Hello my friends! I need to talk.....my 5 mo sober A relasped last night. He didnt come home all night. i knew he was going to the studio to sing at night so i respected his space ad didnt call him to check up on him. He didnt call me either, which is never good but i thought he was respecting my space too....bu...

pineapple · pineapple

I've gotten pretty good at acceptance, and detachment. I no longer even talk to ah about his drinking. But this morning I did. He'd made a date with a friend to go into town this morning. He was walking & talking very slow, had trouble getting his arm in the sleeve of his shirt, etc. I said ¨I may be wro...

juliakessler · juliakessler

I am new, and living w/ my active A. boyfriend. My landlord has banned him from the property, and threatened to evict me if he's seen here. I want him to go he's drowning me, But, I also, love him and he has nowhere to go and no friends, he says I have to help him, everytime I tell him to go I'm afraid he'll sho...

AD1076 · AD1076

but he says no...if you were faced with the same situation in a relationship how did they finally see that they indeed had a problem? He was so angry and distant all of the time....that I moved out to give him space and hope he would relize what he was missing but I have heard that he will need to hit "ro...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	New way to describe honesty (Preview) Hi all. I went to a meeting last night with a younger gf of mine. It was a little overwhelming for her, which made it so for me as well. I was a bit more emotional than usual. Man, was I wanting to cry every second of that meeting. I am actually crying right now lol. A man from the meeting came up to us in the p...	member922	7	1320	May 24, 2011 by member922
	My friend attempted suicide tonight (Preview) I would have never guessed this would ever happen. I have been trying to get her to come with me to Al-anon and we already go to the same bible study group. Her AH has cheated recently and I knew she was having a hard time, but to get this call tonight makes me so furious with this disease!!!! Such a beautif...	flopadopilus	16	1508	May 24, 2011 by tommyecat
	I'm in a big pickle... (Preview) My fiance, alcoholic, our 2m old daughter and I live in my moms house. My mom knows he's an alcoholic (hard to hide) and the things he does (doesnt come home some nights and doesnt answer his phone so he can drink). Last week was her last straw. She said if he does it again, he's out. No if's and's or but's ab...	MAR2011	8	1034	May 24, 2011 by tommyecat
	How did you rid yourself of your A? (Preview) I feel like im flooding the boards but my mind is going a mile a minute. I know it's a possibility that I will end up, unfortunately, needing to leave my fiance. I do not want my daughter growing up around it or thinking it's ok and if nothing changes... it may have to happen. Truth be told, I cannot imagine...	MAR2011	14	942	May 24, 2011 by tommyecat
	Beginning recovery - unexpected feelings (Preview) Hi Everyone, With much gratitude, I report that my alcoholic husband finally came to an emotional surrender - with many apologies and tears, and last week I took him (voluntarily) to an inpatient recovery program. Recap: I and my one-year-old child have been living with my in-laws for two months no...	KLotus	6	736	May 24, 2011 by kitty
	Fiancee just left me 7 months pregnant....Need any help I can get (Preview) mm....I dont know i guess i just need some perspective. My fiancee just left me seven months pregnant, the day after we signed a lease on a new place and left me hanging with a thousand dollars worth of orders to fill in our mutual business, that i am not capable of filling myself...some of them with depos...	sierramorningstar	6	664	May 24, 2011 by tommyecat
	Does anyone know if this is normal behavior for children of A`s (Preview) First of all, I personally feel hurt and betrayed by my 7 yr old grandaughter. I pretty much do everything for her as most of you have heard. When she is with her mother or her grandfather I get anxious because they let her stay up late and there just are no boundaries. I worry about how far she goes when she i...	Samsgram	12	992	May 24, 2011 by Jennifer
	Any Missouri/Joplin members? (Preview) Constant stream of thoughts and prayers going your way...Be careful!! (((hugs)))	Jerry F	4	1332	May 24, 2011 by tommyecat
	I had a nice weekend... (Preview) This weekend my bf was away at a program for getting a DUI a year ago. It was so nice to hear from him, he was sober the whole time. We talked, but I also did a lot for me. I kept my focus on me and my kids. We laughed a lot and had some quiet time too. I spent some time at a friend's with her kids too, we made a big...	youfoundme	6	1205	May 23, 2011 by member922
	Seeing the Change.... (Preview) What a Month :0) I Currently Have so Many things going on right now, that I at times Catch myself just staring off into space Thanking HP for All the Blessings that have been Laid before me... I have found that when I am Down, it is by choice... And since I Turned My Frown Upside Down WOW has HP really opened m...	Jozie	4	747	May 23, 2011 by member922
	VENT (Preview) Well, ah who drinks every day managed to not drink all day on Friday for my birthday. But he's made up for it, now on day two of a binge. I've tried TCOMF, pretending that he isn't even here, as in reality, he isn't. His body may be here, drunk or passed out, but HE is not. I've been doing my own things, working...	pineapple	8	703	May 23, 2011 by pineapple
	Burnout (Preview) I think I've burned myself out. It started five years ago when I was 19, trying to single-handedly care for my schizophrenic sister while mom and dad were still in denial about her condition. Although mom and dad are now helping her and not in denial any more, I still have often felt stressed out by her (l...	atheos	4	1043	May 23, 2011 by youfoundme
	Detachment (fairly new to Alanon-adult child) (Preview) Hello Everyone: I'm attending Alanon meetings and trying very hard to understand things - it's very overwhelming. My father was an alcoholic-he's deceased now 5 years. I'm a non-alcoholic married to a non-alcoholic for 20 years and very happy with with husband. I have a male friend who I do lov...	kitty5	6	1213	May 23, 2011 by maryjane
	A Serenity Filled Saturday~AMAZING! (Preview) I had the most amazing Saturday~the best in months, and the only explanation I can find is that I "stopped" to smell the roses...the irony being I didn't stop all day long! We had our first sunshine filled day here in weeks it seemed, and when I woke up and saw the sunshine, I decided to soak i...	shellyj123	3	536	May 23, 2011 by youfoundme
	family and friends attitude (Preview) My AH is temporarily sober (who knows for how long) But my family can't seem to accept him, anymore. I moved out because of the chaos and stress his drinking brought to my life...but he was never angry or abusive to anyone...except for some unfortunate late night calls. He has been uninvited to family e...	alexmaui	8	813	May 23, 2011 by alexmaui
	Some ESH would be appreciated (Preview) Dear MIP family - and you are very dear to me. I am struggling at the moment with a very sick AH who is not eating - I can get my hand round his upper arm - and has a very damaged liver, gastric tract, etc.(for those who don't know - I have been married to AH for 39 years + and he has been alcohol dependant for the la...	Tattyhead	8	808	May 22, 2011 by maresie
	Rushing into relationships (Preview) One of my housemates has started dating her boss. They always did have an intense relationship. There were a lot of lines blurred in there. I feel uncomfortable because of course all my relationships (and most of them disasters) were started at warp speed. If someone wanted to date, get to know me...	maresie	9	996	May 22, 2011 by maresie
	alcoholism really is a family disease... (Preview) So my mom comes over today to drop off some flowers. She starts talking about random stuff then the conversations turns to how she feels as a result of me not telling her what's going on in my life and, in particular, how I'm not sharing with her what I do and do not tell my daughter about what's going on with...	danielle0516	10	739	May 22, 2011 by danielle0516
	Battling the overwhelming (Preview) I'm not kidding when I say that my grass is 4 feet tall in some places around my yard - places I can't reach with the riding mower. When I walk around my yard I fight dispair because its SO much work - every single step around the yard shows me things I have to try to get done. I used to have a handle on it, before I...	likemyheart	16	912	May 22, 2011 by likemyheart
	Sad and Lonely Today (Preview) Hi Everyone, I feel better when I post here, much the same way I feel better when I share at a meeting. So right now I'm writing just to make the fingers do something and get the gobidilgluck out of my head. As I have shared before, my wife is 12 months sober from alcohol and benzos this coming Wednesday. ...	surfingmaestro	7	726	May 22, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Do Not Feed The Animals (Preview) .......read a sign in a local state park..... D O N O T F E E D T H E A N I M A L S ...You will DESTROY their natural instinct for survival The sign reminds me of myself before I walked into the rooms of Alanon. Enabling, doing for others rather than myself, covering up lies, protecting loved ones fr...	tommyecat	8	1253	May 22, 2011 by tommyecat
	Wavering - UGH (Preview) So I haven't spoken with the ABF in almost 2 wks. We have decided on a 1 month break. I am wishing that he would contact me at least to say hi. Just general conversation. I know I don't want him to and I appreciate his respect of the boundary. I am doing so well without him, not looking for emails from him s...	member922	21	938	May 21, 2011 by flopadopilus
	a decision finally (Preview) My fiance went to his moms to spend his weekend with his 11 year old son. They had usually came here, but since last weekend was a bad weekend of his drinking I asked him to please go there. I am tired of the drinking, the added flavoring, the need to drink to get work done. Actually I am just tired. He called l...	JustJill	6	661	May 21, 2011 by maryjane
	How to Respond? (Preview) Tonight, my ex called me. He was down. He had a cold, so I wasn't certain if he meant he was down because he was physically ill. Then, he said that he was down because he lost his job, his house, and wife. That was the exact order. I've heard that for men the job is the hardest to loose. What does one say...	GailMichelle	9	916	May 21, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Hey Everyone...........Today Is Pineapple's Birthday !! (Preview) Sending you birthday wishes to Guatemala. I hope you have a great day, eat a lot of cake.........and don't get mad at me for telling the world. LOL. Happy Birthday HUGS, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Friday 20th of May 2011 02:26:38 AM	RLC	14	1418	May 21, 2011 by Tattyhead
	tough decisions (Preview) my a b/f thats what he will ever be untill i cut it off completely,i live in my own home me and my son i pay my own bills and take care of my 24 y/o son whom has several dr appt.due to severe sleep apnea and low oxygen levels he weighs 404 lbs,so yes ive got my hands full everythings in my name (thank gosh).so my a b...	pattyann1963	4	714	May 21, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Boundaries/Expectations (Preview) Kinda confused about this, I am not sure what it means to have boundaries, but yet don't have expectations? Can anyone explain this. It seems to me if you have boundaries, these are like expectations....???	oldergal	14	8455	May 21, 2011 by Otie
	new to Alanon - please need help re: trouble with alcoholic friend help (Preview) I have a male friend who is an alcoholic. He is very nice but when he drinks which is all the time I just can't be there to see it or be part of it as I am an adult child of an alcoholic (deceased father) so it brings up horrific memories for me. I love my alcoholic friend as a brother and it kills me to see him se...	kitty5	12	17011	May 21, 2011 by hotrod
	Up Date On My Friend - Thanks For Your Prayers (Preview) (((To MY MIP Family))) I posted Monday about a dear friend who was hit head on by a drunk driver early this past Sunday morning and was listed in critical condition. I would like to report that he is out of the woods and was taken out intensive care earlier today. I talked with him late this afternoon. He is...	RLC	12	797	May 21, 2011 by White Rabbit
	Round 1-Lyn (Preview) Well, I managed to get away from my AH. But he isn't leaving me alone. He keeps calling 100 times a day asking if I am going to commit to supporting him if he goes to a program. My thought is, been there done that. It didn't work. Then he threatens to leave the hospital he is at..(he checked himself into a phyc...	lyn46	10	789	May 20, 2011 by lyn46
	Our Lives Can Change In The Blink Of An Eye (Preview) Some of you know I am in the ladies apparel wholesale business. I buy 90% of my apparel from one company. The owner and I have been the best of friends, more like brothers for 15 years. He is like family a wonderful carring man in his early 40's with a wife and two children. We value and respect each oth...	RLC	18	1093	May 20, 2011 by danielle0516
	Got myself to the meeting room last night :) (Preview) I am so glad I went. My bf had an interview yesterday and proceeded to drink into a black out afterwards...so around 5:30 we got home, ate and I left to take my son to karate and get me to the meeting. Around 7pm the meeting began. HE called me right at 7, my phone was off so I didn't hear it (thank the gods) a...	youfoundme	9	857	May 20, 2011 by pinkchip
	someone please help- i don't know what to do (Preview) My girlfriend is an alcoholic and has been sober for a couple years now. I love her very, very much. Right now we're in a rocky place and she's going thru some stuff she won't even try explaining to me because it has to do with being an alcoholic. I don't know what's going on inside her head. Anyway, last nig...	tendo	9	1006	May 20, 2011 by abbyal
	Step 6&7 experiences (Preview) Good morning! I would love to hear your experiences with step 7 (and I guess step 6 as well). When you did step 5 with your sponsor and then went into that prayer meditation time after when you " Humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings" what happened? Did it happen right away? Were you entire...	Aimee	7	1257	May 20, 2011 by abbyal
	Starting to wonder what is wrong with ME (Preview) So since taking the month of no contact with the abf (wk and a half so far), I have had 2 male friends that I haven't spoken to in awhile actually ask me to go to coffee or something. One of them even suggested dinner. They both acted really complimentary and happy to catch up. The one actually planned to g...	member922	16	665	May 20, 2011 by member922
	Miracles (Preview) I first stumbled into the Al-Anon rooms in January. I'm new to the miracles the program can bring to my thinking. Last night, AH was... well, an alcoholic with all of the rights, responsibilities and privileges of that title. AH got angry and left. He was only gone about 45 minutes. Now, the miracl...	Very Very Tired	10	926	May 20, 2011 by Very Very Tired
	My facebook (Preview) If you want to see the latest pictures you are welcome to go to my facebook under Debra Potter. hugs,deb	Debilyn	7	833	May 20, 2011 by member922
	controlling and shoulding?? (Preview) I am really having a hard time with something. I am not really sure how to explain but here goes. My husband has been pot free for just over a year. He has not worked since my daughter was born in late 2006. He started school before he went to rehab but had to drop his classes while in rehab. The past year he has...	dragonflys	12	760	May 19, 2011 by tommyecat
	First time discussing my experiences..just want to understand (Preview) I haven't been to alanon meetings before but recent events have pushed me to realize I need to talk with others who may be experiencing the same things I am. I have a dear friend who I've known for almost 20 years that was recently hospitalized because she couldn't stand up. She and I speak on the phone re...	JustWantToUnderstand	7	909	May 19, 2011 by tommyecat
	For all us newbies . . . . . . . .WAIT (Preview) Last night at a meeting, the topic was on listening. One member shared something that I never heard before. She said when she notices that she might be talking too much, she remembers the acronym WAIT. Some members in the know, laughed. But then newbies, me included, were perplexed. Then she e...	GailMichelle	7	1132	May 19, 2011 by youfoundme
	Sad today (Preview) Didn't get to go to the meeting last night, but I am going to the one tonight. My bf drank again yesterday, into another blackout. He fell asleep after work, and I had to take my older son for his doctor appointment. So we did that and when we returned home, my bf was still asleep. I made supper and he cam...	youfoundme	13	1142	May 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Cleaning out my God box~and I thought He had bailed on me~WOW! (Preview) I spent some time the past two days gathering up things for a yard sale, and in the midst of cleaning, I found my old God box (I have several)...I decided to stop the decluttering and gathering and read the notes in my God box from the past year and was amazed to find that everyone had been answered... i...	shellyj123	8	1043	May 19, 2011 by shellyj123
	Birthday Chips (Preview) I have a scenerio for those of you that have been active in the Alanon/AA program awhile. There is a person in my homegroup that attended a few meetings of adult children in the late 60's. This person said they didnt have a sponsor, nor attended meetings of any kind on a regular basis. This member who...	tommyecat	6	4473	May 19, 2011 by Aloha
	Yay! Good news! (Preview) ...as I shared at my F2F meeting today, I am the kind of person who would start off a call to 911 with "I'm sorry to bother you, but my house is on fire"... I'm really not good at asking for things I need. Recently I posted here about asking a manager at work not to schedule me for overtime on a certa...	atheos	7	929	May 18, 2011 by wp
	more that i dont understand....... (Preview) ok, so i have an earlier post that my A relased, but i didnt clarify what he relapsd on. He went to rehab for drinking and pain pills and what ever he could get his hands on. He didnt drink and he says he is really solid and wont ever drink, but a guy left out a line of speed, he says he ignored it for a long time......	Dawny	9	1118	May 18, 2011 by danielle0516
	D.e.n.i.a.l.... Didn't Even No I Am Lie'n.... (Preview) Denial for me is HUGE .... I sit back and realized today after reading "Hope for Today" that I still Suffer Alot from Denial... I have learned to say.. "I'm Good, No Worries" when I am Dieing inside, I am good at Denying myself Happiness, & Joy alot of the times, because I Have n...	Jozie	5	1367	May 18, 2011 by hotrod
	coincidental share (Preview) My wife maintains a group of friends that she has completely vilified me too. All the problems she was having at work or missing social engagements with these friends due to alcohol were attributed to the stress I was causing her. I started fantasizing about her step nine. Pretty funny actually...	DadtoCandE	6	851	May 18, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Relapse (Preview) My son's drug of choice is meth, he has just been released from prison for foolishness associated with poor decision making while under the influence. He is 39 YO he has been in and out of jail for over 25 years because of his continued use. Once again before his release I wrote that if he was to live with m...	Latinarose	4	954	May 18, 2011 by Latinarose
	New but not sure if I want to be here. (Preview) Hi everyone. I have a friend who is 41 and has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. She grew up in an abusive household but is now married with children. At first her drinking was kind of social and we all did it. Now, however, it's to the point of her blacking out, losing her memory, driving d...	tarmale	7	443	May 18, 2011 by tommyecat
	Putting away my microscope (Preview) I like the reading in One Day at a Time from yesterday. Part of it says: '"The hardest thing for me to learn,' said a member at an Al-Anon meeting, 'is to stop imagining that I can figure out why my husband acts the way he does. Automatically almost, I jump to conclusions about his activities and hi...	White Rabbit	9	1273	May 18, 2011 by tommyecat
	Locked myself in my apartment, & took the phone off the hook (Preview) I know Im hiding but, i got him out and i don't want to see or talk to him because i know im not strong enough to say no to him, so, Im hiding, from him from the world, from everyonr and evrything, I feel like im just waiting for something to bad to happen but if i stick my head in the sand ill be ok for now i just want...	juliakessler	6	754	May 18, 2011 by Rora
	After a brief and fantastic reconciliation, things collapsed to new proportions... (Preview) After a 2.5 yr separation, my exaH and I recently tried on a short reconciliation after his 3 months in rehab. I really thought a miracle had taken place. We were communicating. We were sifting through all the hurts, all the fear, all the damage. We were understanding of each others places. It was...	Rora	11	754	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Just need some support today living with active alcoholism (Preview) So I have been working really hard on my own, since I've only gotten to one meeting, I didn't get a sponsor yet. This board has helped and listening to other posts about how to handle things in the mean time until I get a sponsor. Anyway, a few days ago my bf drank, and I didn't react. Things remained calm...	youfoundme	7	571	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Even in the darkest days, your higher power is there... (Preview) I thought I would share a story about how I got introduced to Al Anon and my wife got introduced to AA. It's only recently that I've reflected on this and all that happened and how it is so obvious that my higher power was in control, although I never would have guessed it at the time. About a year or so ago, my...	usedtobeanyer	5	647	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	not sure if i belong here (Preview) My father in law is an alcoholic and has been since my husband was a late teenager (after the mother died). he is now in his 70's. There are only two children one daughter and my husband. We now live beside the father. My sister in law lives away but takes responsibility for his shopping, his housekee...	maddon	6	681	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
	Feeling Down (Preview) Went to see family doctor with AH this am. He has had a week in hospital but began drinking again the minute he came out. At least he didn't try to tell her any lies about drinking although he did underestimate the quantity. She told him he is killing himself and asked if he wanted to die. He said no but perh...	Tattyhead	14	761	May 17, 2011 by Ness
	i dont know if i can do this.H (Preview) Hello my friends! I need to talk.....my 5 mo sober A relasped last night. He didnt come home all night. i knew he was going to the studio to sing at night so i respected his space ad didnt call him to check up on him. He didnt call me either, which is never good but i thought he was respecting my space too....bu...	Dawny	7	636	May 17, 2011 by youfoundme
	exchanging one drug for another (Preview) I've gotten pretty good at acceptance, and detachment. I no longer even talk to ah about his drinking. But this morning I did. He'd made a date with a friend to go into town this morning. He was walking & talking very slow, had trouble getting his arm in the sleeve of his shirt, etc. I said ¨I may be wro...	pineapple	6	688	May 17, 2011 by flopadopilus
	I feel trapped, how do I get free? (Preview) I am new, and living w/ my active A. boyfriend. My landlord has banned him from the property, and threatened to evict me if he's seen here. I want him to go he's drowning me, But, I also, love him and he has nowhere to go and no friends, he says I have to help him, everytime I tell him to go I'm afraid he'll sho...	juliakessler	6	740	May 17, 2011 by GailMichelle
	I am new here.....I am pretty sure he has a drinking problem (Preview) but he says no...if you were faced with the same situation in a relationship how did they finally see that they indeed had a problem? He was so angry and distant all of the time....that I moved out to give him space and hope he would relize what he was missing but I have heard that he will need to hit "ro...	AD1076	6	821	May 17, 2011 by tommyecat
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.