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Family
(Preview)
My wife's family knows about her disease and her depression and the struggles that have come as a result. My side of the family does not. We're going to be spending a lot of time with them this weekend--in fact, today my wife was with her sister in-law for much of the day. I'm struggling with the idea of the...
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usedtobeanyer
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17
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384
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The last trigger....
(Preview)
So for the last couple of days I have been practicing my Let Go and Let God. It seems to be going ok. I have severed all ties with my exA, even had my boss change my work number so he could no longer call there (he would leave nasty messages at work) It's been almost a year I believe that I have heard anything f...
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mslouise
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7
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569
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Taking care of ourselfs first!
(Preview)
I was the program chairman at my f2f meeting this past Tuesday night. I volunteered! I had it on Taking care of ourselves first!!!! It was such an awesome program so many positive vibes coming at every direction. I was really proud of the feedback I was able to give when someone shared!!!!! These past fe...
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MDK
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5
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370
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First Al-Anon Meeting Tonight...Any Advice?
(Preview)
I'll make this brief--Hi, my name (here) is Whisperine. I'm a college grad who's moved out of her family home, but not out of her family dysfunction. My parents split unexpectedly after 27 years of marriage last year. At first it was a "trial seperation," then it became permanent, and now I...
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Whisperine
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7
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5572
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Just want to share this website
(Preview)
http://www.neillneill.com/married-to-a-functioning-alcoholic-help/comment-page-1#comment-121678
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hawaiilover
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6
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344
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Passive aggressive behavior or ADD?
(Preview)
I find that my dh can be quite passive aggressive and I swear he knows exactly which buttons to push on which days just to drive me crazy. I had a friend suggest to me that it's his ADHD that makes him less helpful and less inclined to pitch in around the house yet I feel that it's passive aggressive and that...
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ilovedogs
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8
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4301
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HELP!
(Preview)
This has been a very emotional last few months. My abfand I are no longer together...he broke it off with me. After 3 months of attempting this roller coaster ride again. Which i find almost humerous b/c I should have been the one to stand up to him. But I'm just learning these tools to learn to put mys...
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hopeful411
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4
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343
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Literature
(Preview)
I know there are A LOT of al-anon/ AA books out there and available for use. I want to know some of the ones that have inspired people. I want to know what ones are great for beginners. I don't know where a "list" is of approved literature, so websites can help. I want to try and find gooe material...
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Kristi136188
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9
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633
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What should I do?
(Preview)
Hello all, I am new to this and have never posted in a forum before, so here it goes... I have been married for 8 years. My husband and I have a 4 year old daughter and another one on the way this fall. My husband can be an amazing person. He can be kind, thoughtful, and can make me feel on top of the world. He...
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Kate1979
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8
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531
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telemarketing alert
(Preview)
Just a personal service to you family members with cell phones. At the end of June if you have not registered your cell phone with 888 382 1222 (you gotta call that number with the cell phone you are registering) the telemarketers will descend on it with drool at the corner of their lips. If you like ab...
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Jerry F
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3
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442
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Hubby's binge
(Preview)
Hello Family: Updates on my husband. For the past few weeks he has been on this drinking binge. It is going on 7 days a week. The only day I saw him sober (for a moment) was on Father's Day. During the day, he calls me just to check on me. By the time he gets home, he is totally wasted. The other day he called and w...
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hawaiilover
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8
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534
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Confused as to whether or not hubby has a problem.....
(Preview)
This is my first post. I've been worried for a while now about my husband's drinking. He has a family history of alcoholism, and has himself been drinking more and more. He averages 2 martinis and a large bottle of wine per night. Pretty much every night. He usually is slurring by bedtime (which co...
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quietgal
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7
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497
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Trust
(Preview)
I'm hoping that someone will share what they have learned about trust in a long term relationship with their ASpouse, who has either recovered or not recovered. Believe me I get the part about lying is part of the disease. Is it possible to repair damage with your sig other on the trust level? Even i...
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Pushka
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14
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925
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Taking the next right or best step
(Preview)
For awhile I was only hoping to reach a place of serenity and I have, not perfect of course but well enough to make me happy, but now it is time to take a few more leaps of faith and broaden my scope of where I can go from here. These next right steps are going to involve decisions and interactions that scare m...
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Jennifer
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6
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652
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Misunderstandings - things aren't always what they seem!
(Preview)
Today at a meeting, I shared about my difficulties with taking step two as an atheist, and how I was resolving that issue by using Buffy the Vampire Slayer as my higher power. And people laughed. I was really hurt by that. This had been a very real, personal struggle for me, and I was completely serious ab...
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atheos
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10
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431
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I Ended It
(Preview)
Having an awful time....I officially broke up with my ABF because he is out and about every night with a bunch of girls. He says he has never cheated on me, but Im just tired of watching his life from the sidelines. I actually went out and met a really nice guy...obviously I am not looking for anything othe...
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Corgi2
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13
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810
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Easy-to-Read Article on Detaching With Love
(Preview)
http://www.oprah.com/spirit/How-to-Love-Unconditionally-Martha-Becks-Advice/print/1
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GailMichelle
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4
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488
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I am happy for yesterday
(Preview)
I wanted to write something that was more positive than negative, as alot of my posts have been. So, I figured I'd share my day yesterday. I had planned to take the day and enjoy it. To do whatever I wanted to do to be happy. I got a phone call from my husband telling me he would be in town and at his parents, who...
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Kristi136188
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2
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347
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in all our affairs................
(Preview)
affairs.....work.......home.........work............family....
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MDK
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7
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727
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what do i tell the kids?
(Preview)
My wife tried to kill herself last monday and left my kids unattended in a house. She got out of treatment 10 days ago. She has been acting unstable and wanted the kids for four days. I tried to set up supervised visits and her family refused. They said she had the right to have the kids and this would set bac...
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Jeff
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15
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502
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trying to change...
(Preview)
I am trying to change my outlook on life. I am so tired of living like I don't deserve to be happy at times. I am so sick & tired period of the way I have changed since I returned from my trip! Luckily I can actually see where I went wrong without beating myself up too much! I just want to forget the past &...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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280
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I just do not kow what to do anymore
(Preview)
I have a AH son who is 27 for 12 years now I have bailed him out. Picked him up in the middle of the night. Sat in ICU after he overdosed on pills a attempted suicide. I do not know what to do anymore to help him. When he is sober he is a good person, a hard worker. Well his girlfriend of 2 years left him and he is on a...
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Mama2418
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7
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440
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Let Go and Let God
(Preview)
Through this journey, I am learning so much about myself and my HP. Last week was extremely challenging: I found out my AH has an arrest warrant out on him for writing bad checks, he's also has been calling my adult daughters and telling them that I abandoned him in his time of need (he fails to mention tha...
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Green Eyes
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6
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414
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Crazy Train ...
(Preview)
I have an extremely warped sense of humor, it's years of growing up in dysfunction that I choose to find the absuridty in situations. It's easier for me to find the way out and ease the burden of the pain as well. Since starting alanon I laugh so much more than I used to, the genuine laugh not the bitter on...
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Pushka
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7
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324
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Should I be concerned?
(Preview)
I'm brand new to this, so I hope I make sense. About 11 years ago my husband came to realize he could not control his alcohol intake and made the choice to check in for help. He attended an in-hospital rehab and then went to meetings for about a year after. He stayed sober for 8 wonderful years. Then he d...
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Faith56
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5
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425
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back and forth iam getting dizzy!
(Preview)
Somebody, anybody help with these crazy back and forth emotions and how do you tell if your ah is manipulating saying all these promises and how much he loves me, but yet is still drinking everyday and by the way i have filed for divorce, but he says as soon as i drop it he will stop drinking immediately, wh...
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sameoldstuff
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4
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526
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Worked the program this weekend with good outcomes
(Preview)
I am really thanking my HP today for helping me find Al Anon and MIP. Things got started Friday evening. I was home from work and had gone to the grocery store. My AH was on his way home, and he asked me on the phone if I had bought beer at the grocery store. The conversation evolved into a discussion abou...
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stephaniej
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4
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304
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Prayer
(Preview)
I'm curious to hear others thoughts on prayer and how you incorporate it into your recovery. I'm feeling very connected to my higher power and have for a while now. However, the concept of prayer is tripping me up now and again. I learned long ago not to pray for things that you want--for example, don't p...
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usedtobeanyer
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9
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719
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Having a hard time
(Preview)
I was doing really well with getting to meetings...but didn't get to a meeting at all this week. Then some things I have been dealing with in my life that have nothing to do with alcohol or my qualifier have been getting worse. I decided that I needed to find a therapist that can help me deal with my chi...
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youfoundme
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7
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344
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Last night...
(Preview)
About a year or so ago, my wife and I had tickets to go to a concert at Radio City Music Hall in NY. Her all-time favorite artist was performing there and I bought her the tickets as an anniversary gift. She was so excited and even though I don't care for this artist much, I was excited as well. Anyway, the nig...
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usedtobeanyer
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5
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322
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Unacceptable when??
(Preview)
I get so mad sometimes, when I think of this disease.....when does it or things become just plain unacceptable, even if they have a disease??? Unacceptable for them to keep drinking....unaccetable for them to yell and belittle, not work, not care, not take care of their kids, not return the love we g...
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mslouise
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23
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749
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How do I detach?
(Preview)
So.. since my AH left 2 weeks ago I have not heard from him. His dad came by to pick up some of his things. (makes you wonder how old he is huh he's 25) I explained to his dad the incident that had happened which led to him having to leave. Drunk shoved my mom. etc. I told his dad that if he doesn't let his son face...
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Betterfuture
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6
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742
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Irrational Anger
(Preview)
Yes it is irrational anger because it's totally irrational to be angry at something that is a thing rather than a person. Even that can be irrational, at least I can pin point why I am angry. I am totally struggling with my anger at a truck .. lol. Yes I said it, yes I am angry at the truck. I know logicall...
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Pushka
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3
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358
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First time to message board
(Preview)
Hi I'm Lyne. Not new to recovery, have just been absent for awhile. I'm gay and have been with my partner for almost 20 years. We got legally married a few years ago. She is addicted to alcohol, work, food, gambling, and lying. I'm able to cope really well some of the time. Since last Sunday when I ha...
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Lyne
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10
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666
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MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MTG
(Preview)
I am unable to honor my commitment to chair the Monday morning meeting for tomorrow as I have another medical test at the hospital and will not be able to arrive back home in time to chair the meeting. Hoping someone will be able to step-up and chair for me. Thanks
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shimo
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0
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145
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Science of Addiction and the Disease Model
(Preview)
http://www.npr.org/2011/06/23/137348338/compass-of-pleasure-why-some-things-feel-so-good?sc=fb&cc=fp
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Bradly
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3
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705
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Feeling lost and alone
(Preview)
I have been working hard on my recovery, going to meetings each week and working the steps with my sponsor. My partner has been acting resentfully towards me for a while now. He blames me for his moods and the things he feels resentful about. I have been working hard not to be critical and controlling a...
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Freya
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6
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387
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Freindship or Fo ?
(Preview)
I have previosly had an addiction to alcholhol, i have been sober for almost 4 years, and recently one of my sons friends had been coming over and asked me to be friend his mother. Well with doing this we found ourselves together everyday all day. I watched her for 2 months drinking till drunk everyday...
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countrygirl14437
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5
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461
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done!!!!
(Preview)
Im here to vent, to seek comfort, for someone just to tell me that it does get better! I have just started seeking out al-anon which i've learned of through my counselor. My abf's birthday was yester day we had good plans. It ended sadly! He came over and was fine then went into a rage taking it out on our 3 ye...
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hopeful411
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7
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557
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"Sha-na-na" says:
(Preview)
My sons are not allowed to come over to the house for any reason whatsoever if they have been drinking in the past 48hrs. (no hangover, or bad attitudes, irritability, etc...). Now, at the door, I warn them: "If you be sippin......I be trippin!". They seem to get the idea better with the hu...
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Otie
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7
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421
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Meeting Discussion Ideas??
(Preview)
Hi all It's the first time that I've chaired a meeting for a month and tomorrow is my last chair meeting before I hand over to someone else. I'm looking for a good discussion topic, ideally I'd like to write questions/statements surrounding the topic on to pieces of paper and have members pick a questio...
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Rhi
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5
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16195
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Quick Update :)
(Preview)
Well, I did not make the Sunday meeting, did not make my regular Tuesday meeting. I did make the Thursday f2f meeting though. I'm very glad I did wonderful people, small intimate group. I still am without a sponsor that's ok because I am still doing the work. I figure that is what will count down the r...
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Pushka
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2
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327
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She lasted one day after treatment
(Preview)
My soon to be ex got home on saturday from Hazeldon. She was met here by here convicted felon, pill pushing boyfriend. She spent 7 hours in three days with my three boys. The entire time I received emails, texts and calls blaming me for the divorce and everything else wrong in her life. She ultimatel...
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Jeff
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20
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677
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Lonely Today, Trying to Work My Program
(Preview)
I'm off for the summer, the kids are home too, it's Saturday and AW in recovery has been all worked up and stressed "because everyone is home." Last summer when we were home it was just me and the kids most of the time because my wife was in her first 30 days of sobriety and out of her mind, attend...
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surfingmaestro
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3
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260
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Vodka returned to our home tonight,after his suicide attempt 6wks ago, and 4weeks sobriety...
(Preview)
Ive been trying to prepare emotionally and in knowledge in advance for the "slip",didnt think the bottle would be back quite so soon, even thou A had talked of "experimenting"with it again. I guessed he'd brought some home and hid it tonight, I went looking so I'd know if 'it&q...
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Brooke
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8
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646
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Taking care of myself
(Preview)
I attended an online alanon meeting tonight, my first one. The subject was talking about taking care of yourself. I hear myself pretty much everyday telling clients (i'm a psych nurse for those of you that don't know) "you need to take this time and concentrate on you. you can't take care of anybo...
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Kristi136188
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5
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795
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everything...
(Preview)
Ok, I am new. Well, sort of. I joined a face-to-face group about a full month ago...I have a sponsor who offered her services during an open group meeting after I shared some of my horrific life stories. I am not 100% sure about the expectations of a sponsor what should i expect from her and what she shou...
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vizslame
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17
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980
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Saturday night MIP Al-Anon meeting (6/25)
(Preview)
Hopefully a few of you who come to the chat meetings will read this. Because of a change in my schedule I will not be able to chair the Beginner's meeting tonight (6/25). Thank you and hope to see you at future online meetings. Take care. courage (Della)
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Courage
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0
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219
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I have been snooped on....
(Preview)
OOps My son's AW figured out how to get into his email. He and I have written back and forth. I of course sounded like I do here. Thank goodness, but of course she still took it badly, afterall it was truths she never wants him to know. He said he didn't ever care, she should not have been reading his stuff. Bu...
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Debilyn
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2
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479
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Progress
(Preview)
It has been a while since I posted anything but I am happy to say things are improving and there is hope. I am in the process of separation we still live together and I have been using the al anon tools and repeating and practicing do not react do not react over and over. Reaching for my Hp going to face2 face m...
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Crazy Frog
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3
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227
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breaking
(Preview)
I am slowly starting to realize that not only does my ab have a problem but i have a problem as well. This codependent thing so many of you talk about i am starting to see. I feel very sad and emotional today! All of this is getting the best of me. I am attending a f2f meeting tonight....Im very nervous at t...
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hopeful411
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6
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385
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Concerned mother
(Preview)
Hello Alanon family, just wanted to share where I am today. My daughter Shirley has been experiencing unexplained weight loss for weeks now. I've taken her to the doctors and noone knows the reason for the weight loss. She is still losing as we speak. Also, the doctors found a cyst on her ovaries. We hav...
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hawaiilover
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8
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451
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Taking Off Some of the Pressure
(Preview)
My HP delivered a message LOUD AND CLEAR to me this morning and I am so incredibly grateful for it! My AH is a plumber. We live in a rental apartment. Our water pressure is amazing - we don't have a massager shower head but the water pressure is so great that our ordinary shower head delivers quite an int...
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Mlkiss75
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6
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494
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A family needs our love
(Preview)
Just heard today that one of my Asons major enablers, drinking companion, has died of this hellish disease. He is a year older than my son (35) and he comes from the same small village we live in, they went to school together but they only got together last year through the disease...both homeless livi...
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Ness
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7
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2217
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Im new here
(Preview)
Hello all, I am very thankful to have found this place. I just started attending Al-anon. I am really surprised at how much I actually like it. I never really wanted to open up to someone in person. I have always wanted to act like I have no problems. Well that is a joke because I have a lot lol. I haven...
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daisy31
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7
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549
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still dwelling
(Preview)
I'm not sure why I can't just be strong and not think about why my AH hasn't even bothered to call me since I told him to leave. I know it sounds stupid because I'm the one who told him to leave but once you sober up the next morning wouldn't you feel like "hey I messed up I'm sorry." but nope, no...
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Betterfuture
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7
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391
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courage to change february 1st
(Preview)
It's hard to stop acting as i have in the past, But with al-anons support, i can be the one to change the pattern. I can choose to do what i think is right------- for me. "you have to count on living every single day in a way you belive will make you feel good about your life-----" Katy x
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Katy
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2
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472
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Guilt (ps. Hi, I'm new to the board)
(Preview)
First of all, hello! I'm happy there's an online al-anon board, I'm still not quite ready to go to an actual al-anon meeting, though I think I'm going to need to at some point soon. My mother used to be an alcoholic, then quit for a couple of years, and then began using crack cocaine. She's been using crack...
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poodlenoodle
|
8
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569
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Acceptance
(Preview)
My husband is out and drunk. It is after midnight on a Wednesday. He attended his intensive outpatient therapy today and attended an AA meeting earlier this afternoon. For the first time since last September, he is drinking outside of our home. And he is very drunk - I can barely understand him when he c...
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Mlkiss75
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8
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575
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Cutting the Rope
(Preview)
Hello ((((((Roomies))))))Sorry this is so long..he he.. but I just had to! I had one of those moments today, that I thought I would share about. I was discussing a movie I watched with a friend, a movie called “Touching the Void” the true story of two men who had an adventure while trying to climb the Siul...
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david62
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19
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763
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