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It's been a long time
(Preview)
Hmmm...the more things change, the more they stay the same... My life is so hard, and I'm tired of it... My 18 yo is now exhibiting behavior of his A dad (my ex) and swears at me and blames me...tells me everything is my fault. When I try to engage the ex in convos about parenting...he blames me too...tells...
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rehprof
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11
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506
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dazed & confused
(Preview)
I have so many moments where I feel confused & misinformed. I guess what I am trying to say is this: I don't know much about cell phones but I am getting frustrated because I am running out of data! I have spent a lot of the weekend trying to find entertaining ways to keep myself busy. I acquired so much i...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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319
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Just call me P.I.
(Preview)
So...on Halloween I took daughter to my house where A is to go trick or treating. This is what she wanted. And I wanted to see the neighbors too. I took her out first, then A took her out. While he was gone, I found some interesting bills and a receipt for unemployment payments. He has been very cagey about h...
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Newlife girl
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12
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677
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This n that.
(Preview)
Well Michael Douglas was evicted after 1 day, he didn't get along with the other feline resident. Apparently it was the OTHER cat that was the aggressor which surprises me as MD is pretty feisty. So yesterday A and I left him at the vet in town and today I went and picked him up and brought him back here. My n...
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missmeliss
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11
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553
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Decisions, decisions
(Preview)
I am a grateful member of Alanon, nearly five years and without the support of Alanon friends and trying to work the prgramme I think I would have gone insane. The alcholic in my life is my partner and we have two children 7 and 8 years old. Her father too was an alcoholic and he died as a result. My partner h...
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littlehob
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11
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806
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Finding your limits...
(Preview)
It is wonderful re-connecting to your body and just knowing the yucky feeling you are getting is your limit. I was on the phone with a friend discussing everyday activities breakfast, what is on the agenda, etc....and then it came "is so and so mad at me?" My body cringed. I paused and said th...
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Truth
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4
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237
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Feeling shaken and stirred...this will pass
(Preview)
You won't believe it but I just deleted my post while trying to edit it....I am such a numpty with technology at times lol ...I was going to add that I have had a light bulb moment ... the feelings I'm experiencing WILL pass...I need to let go and trust that everything will work out as my HP intends for me. Wh...
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rainbow
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13
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585
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this is amazing
(Preview)
Wow, just Wow is all I can say! I have been working hard every day,and doing what my therapist suggests and connecting with people here,and using the steps, and last night I felt a sweet peace that I have never experienced before!I am emotionally tired but things are getting better!peace to all,Mary
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mjferg
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8
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277
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Missed a meeting
(Preview)
I missed the meeting I wanted to go to today because I didn't want to deal with the anger/insults when I left the house to go. He was home all day and we had a bunch of projects to do in the house. (Well, I did most of the work. He yelled when I did things the "wrong" or "inconsiderate" wa...
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laguillotina
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2
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260
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No Sunday Spiritual MEETING today.
(Preview)
I will be unable to chair the meeting today. I am sorry for the short notice. I thought I could do it, but am in a lot of pain. I'm having trouble breathing and not sure what's going on. If you are so inclined I'd appreciate good thoughts and prayers. I hope to be back next week. Overcomer
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Overcome
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2
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177
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Health insurance...should I take him off?
(Preview)
I am still covering AH's health insurance. It doesn't cost me anything. I have good coverage..for now anyway. as you all know, he hasn't worked since January. Why should I continue to cover him even if it doesn't cost me anything? Well...it costs $10 for every dental visit, but thats it. I am wonderin...
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Newlife girl
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9
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543
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is recovery never ending?
(Preview)
When will I be done? I mean, the residual crap caused by this disease lingers on in me and im sick of it. Im angry again because I thought I would invite my ex to dinner for christmas, I know its early but theres been drama around it the last 2 yrs so I think, im going to be a big grown up woman, pull up my big pants...
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el-cee
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15
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533
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same old regrets...
(Preview)
I am struggling w/ the same regrets from the past. I hope someone on here has similar experiences so I can see a different point of view. Sometimes I get stuck. One of the main issues I have & will probably always have, is the fact that I am basically barren. I cannot have children. I don't want to adopt...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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436
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Typical sucker me
(Preview)
I have been very protective of my tenants, saying I will not allow them to be homeless and was holding out as long as I could. They have a nice rv on my property. There has been no threat of fines or court or anything. With out any notice, owing me $300 they just took off with their rv and left. nice eh? They are...
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Debilyn
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10
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530
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decision paralysis
(Preview)
i haven't been to an Al Anon meeting in a long time. The last time I was at these boards was a year ago. I just need someone to read this and maybe tell me I'm not crazy? or if I am crazy, that I will get better soon? I traded in an alcoholic for a rageholic. We've been together for 4 years. In the beginning of Sept...
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laguillotina
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12
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367
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So what happened with the job...
(Preview)
I got that job at the rehab as clinical director. Was all set to leave with Monday as my last day. We had a conference call today statewide for the current company I work for. The statewide COO was on that call. It was acknowledged I was leaving. 10 minutes after, the state COO called me and offered to match...
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pinkchip
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25
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600
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Nostalgia gives doubt about break up…love or self sabotage?
(Preview)
The hardest thing about being sick and sad on my favorite holiday and what was suppose to be our 3 year anniversary was that he wasnt there to take care of me, and that even if he had been, it probably would have not been what I hoped for. I miss his smile and his eyes and right now I feel him here with me ever so p...
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astallaslions
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3
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474
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God grant me...
(Preview)
anything you have to calm my mind, body, spirit and emotions. That's what I was praying yesterday after a major reaction spiced by my PTSD disability. One of the guys where I work made the decision to target and victimize me with a delusion he was entertaining and then finished it off with a threat t...
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Jerry F
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10
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494
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Confidence and Self-esteem.
(Preview)
My daughter is 7. I wish her to grow into a responsible, confident adult with high self esteem knowing that she is capable of wonderful things and worth of good in her life. How can I help her achieving it? I guess what I am asking is, why the opposite happens? Why some people- like her father and myself- ha...
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Luiza
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11
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919
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hAPPY hALLOWEEN!
(Preview)
The bestest most favoritest holiday ever! Ghoulies and ghosties of all sorts came to my door and I played with them and tested their ability to laugh! I love Halloween!
This picture ISN'T sideways on my computer, I promise! -- -- Edited by likemyheart on Friday 31st of October 2014 11:55:57 PM
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likemyheart
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6
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226
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This is me.
(Preview)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQh-VDcpkyw Hey alcohol, You have no power over me!!!
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el-cee
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4
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322
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Things that make you go hmmm ...
(Preview)
Or at least they do me .. LOL! Last night after getting the kids to where they need to be and a seriously crazy work week I was able to breathe at the meeting I attend. We all had a great evening! My son went trick or treating with a group of his friends with no adults (they were at his friends new house very,...
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SerenityRUS
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10
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489
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why do we react though!
(Preview)
I react because I feel attacked, as a person my whole being feels violated, that is my responce to someone not understanding me or knowing me well enough to know that by singling me out they challenge my very being, I don't ever go looking for trouble and I would avoid it at all costs but every now and then I...
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Katy
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2
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392
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Still crazy ..
(Preview)
the XAH, .. I'd be ok with that however he just won't leave me alone! UGH!! Last night he texts as I'm out running the kids to and from places, and honestly I'm ignoring it. It's about money in terms of he wants to give me some. The problem is he doesn't follow the rules and he doesn't do what he's suppo...
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SerenityRUS
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0
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308
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Oh dear, my poor boy...
(Preview)
Bowie's new accessory. It works great for halloween, everyone is calling him hannibal. He doesn't think it's particularly funny. Poor guy lol. I will have to talk to him about acceptance.
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missmeliss
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12
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954
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All Over the Map Emotionally
(Preview)
I've been having a full week. I'm very excited to be done with my former workplace. I got more done on Monday than I have on an weekend recently. I felt serene, cooked up a bunch of goodies, cleaned my closet, went for walks, got to more meetings etc. I found out my friend from work's hubby works for our co...
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tiredtonite
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7
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480
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just sitting here...
(Preview)
Just sitting here so I thought I would post. I am sore. It is difficult to sit on these chairs at the library. I am getting ready to go now. I just wanted to post to let everyone know that I am doing OK. Mom is not back yet. I don't know when they will release her. The powers that be will not tell me anything. I am n...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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361
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First week as a divorced woman :)
(Preview)
Well technically I am divorced .. however it's not signed yet and it will be big time. Anyway, XAH is as crazy as you wanna be and that's ok as long as it keeps it to himself .. sharing is so overrated!! There is has been a LOT going on some of which I still can't talk about, that's ok too. My mom sent me a lovel...
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SerenityRUS
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18
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600
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moving forward
(Preview)
I've been dating a man for more than a month he is wonderful he is complete opposite of my exAH. I'm very grateful for all the little things he does he is so caring and thoughtful. The problem is me. Sometimes he does something so nice and so opposite of what my ex would and I catch myself wanting to cry. I wan...
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texasgal
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4
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479
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I need encouragement
(Preview)
So, I am new to this, and I will be honest as I said in another post, I feel like a bug on the bottom of someone's shoe.I cry allot and I feel sick. I have rough nights and I am weary. I guess I need to hear how everyone else felt when they started and how they got better.
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mjferg
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15
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511
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Organization .. HELP!!
(Preview)
I have an apartment sized kitchen trying to fit a garbage bag full of plastic containers into a cabinet that holds both my glass ware and anything plastic. Literally it's the only cabinet available to deal with this issue. I'm debating if I should just donate the whole garbage bag of containers and g...
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SerenityRUS
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12
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627
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Mahalo - Thank you all
(Preview)
Page 304, October 30, the ODAAT in Al-Anon daily reader. This is what the program and MIP is all about. Mahalo John for willingly being that instrument which the Just For Today prayer speaks of. Grateful beyond words and not done yet. (((((hugs)))))
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Jerry F
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12
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535
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If everything is great, why do I feel so awful?
(Preview)
I can't seem to scrape myself off the bottom. My alcoholic has been sober for 24 days. I should be celebrating, but I'm in tears, I feel so bad I almost want to end the relationship. I never felt this alone when he was drinking and I'm so confused. I know I'm doing something wrong, but I don't know what i...
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aim2009
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7
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563
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Hello Possums
(Preview)
Hello everyone! I have just gotten internet access after a few days so here's my ramble about what's been going on. I've just completed day 1 of my new "A-free" life. I spent half the day with A though, so, it doesn't count. Anyway I'll pick up where I left off, last Saturday when A was prancin...
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missmeliss
|
16
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477
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|
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It's amazing how fast...
(Preview)
3 years of program work can disappear on me. I'm the one who made the decision to leave my AH. I'm the one who has chosen not to respond to correspondence since I ended joint counseling. I'm the one who made the mistake of responding to an I love you text that I received this Tuesday after finding out Sunday...
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Jackie11
|
10
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726
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Back again...
(Preview)
Hello all again, last time I was here was in 2009 fast forward to 2014. Things have gotten worse this time the AH is sitting in jail as he has another DUI this time during work, the one thing i am so proud of myself I didnt move heaven and earth to bail him out..and when another family member was going to i stat...
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Aquastrm
|
3
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361
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When you date someone who is a recovering from something
(Preview)
And they tell you I am an alcoholic or a recovering addict, why do they tell you? What are they really saying? " If you stick with me I may relapse, I may slip? Are you gonna stick with me and give me your all? Can you enable me? Why do they come forth and tell you who they are on the very first meeting or dat...
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LinSC
|
10
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523
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saying sorry
(Preview)
When I lived with my ex ah I used to say sorry quite a lot. I took the blame quite a lot, usually to keep the peace or to end the silent treatment or sometimes because the guilt got the better out of me. I never really meant it. I never really believed I owed it not really. I always thought my bad behaviour or har...
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el-cee
|
9
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560
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|
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role models
(Preview)
I listened to a talk talk today by a real life explorer, he was amazing to listen to. He went to the south pole alone and he frequently goes to the north pole and hes like us, he has that spiritual thing going on that we have. It got me thinking that maybe its only through a really hard journey are we able to see...
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el-cee
|
11
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372
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Scrambled Eggs
(Preview)
Hi everyone, been a bit since I have been here and I can tell you I notice the difference of relaxing in my recovery! Right now I feel like scrambled eggs for sure! I have my AH in a 3/4 way house who wants me to just go along with everything they do and say even if it doesn't feel right to me. So for example, he is...
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Flower49
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2
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359
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What do you do?
(Preview)
Hello all, Scanning the threads I see a lot of topics from folks who are in a place I remember being. I like where I am at and for me it is important to my recovery to not forget about where I have been least I forget what that path looks like and make choices that lead me back there. I know me and I know my form of t...
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Mandy123
|
8
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467
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|
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I am having a hard time right now in my life
(Preview)
I generally cycle into a funk at the end of October, 12 years ago it started with losing a pregnancy in my second trimester and the next day my dad died suddenly while we were on our way driving across country to live with him for a time until we got jobs lined up, but my exAH started drinking heavy with the...
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Breakingfree
|
24
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774
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so good to get a break
(Preview)
I had a lovely three hours to myself without children. This doesn't happen often enough. I think its the fourth time in two years. Sometimes one or two of my little ducklings will be at daycare and that's half a break. But time completely alone,no pram to navigate,no toddler to chide for squealing in a p...
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aquamom23
|
8
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405
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I am so angry And I want everyone to know the truth!!
(Preview)
Please help me have some self control. I see my AH talking with people on facebook and I want to spit. Ok, I'm going to just come out and say it. Maybe I already have, I don't remember. AH and I were coworkers. He got fired in March. I am still there, working at the same place and trying not to lose it!! Some da...
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Newlife girl
|
7
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485
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|
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What rewards did you get from the victim role?
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
This question was asked in my meeting tonight. I thought I would share it with you and see what you think.x
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el-cee
|
44
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1622
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skipped 18 years of meetings
(Preview)
That's a lot of meetings to miss after ten years of alanon. It will be interesting to see how far astray I am as this disease tears it's ugly monster head at my son. My Dad was a 30 year AA member. He died on April 30 this year. I messed up with my son today. I fee terrible. I don't deserve help tonight, but I am so...
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eriegroupgirl
|
10
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469
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lol
(Preview)
It's not even 24 hours and his brother is messaging me. OMG, we can't do this, we're getting married, we need our house back. He left here having drunk 1 bottle of wine, he bought 3, I guess he drank the rest on the way and at their house. I feel sad for him, I know how to handle him, but it isn't my job anymore. ...
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missmeliss
|
17
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665
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I'M NOT JOKING!! I nearly got into a fight today
(Preview)
This is so unreal I go to goodwill to donate some clothing and i hear this "squeak squeak" sound and i know its an animal, most likely a dog and so i follow the sound...i find a dog in 77 degree weather, in the sun, locked in a black dodge caravan NO windows down, not even a crack and doggie sees...
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neshema2
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13
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539
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Also a little update about Michael Douglas
(Preview)
This will sound deranged but, Cat Lady reared her head again just as we were moving out. Michael Douglas escaped and didn't come back for a couple of days and I started recieving messages from Cat Lady again. It had been months since I had heard from her. I was so upset and so worried, but her messages were...
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missmeliss
|
12
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362
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trying not to react
(Preview)
I received a phone call from a mutual friend of my ex today, she lives with his brother and she hadn't seen me in a while.She told me she saw my ex with an old girl friend the other day, I am thinking that was awful fast we just broke up.I want to call and give him a piece of my mind so bad but I am sure it would only...
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mjferg
|
6
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436
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physical detachment / emotional detachment
(Preview)
Detachment is a very important tool in my Al-Anon tool box. I live with active alcoholism, so I use detachment often. However, until recently I was not discerning the difference between physical and emotional detachment. When my husband drinks, I do something that helps me think about me. I love t...
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cloudyskies
|
6
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1135
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Such a change!
(Preview)
Hello all, I joined this forum around December last year when I was at Rock bottom with my BF drinking habits. Everyone was really fantastic and helped me through such a bad time but the one thing I kept hearing was try and find a local meeting. I didn't know if I had the nerve and was unsure if I would be abl...
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Hopingfor
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4
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314
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Heavy denial, about animals too
(Preview)
I have been lurking a bunch since posting midsummer. First I want to say how moved I DMV by the deep reservoir of patience, kindness and honesty some of the regulars demonstrate here to person after person!! Truly remarkable. I feel badly to take up people's time and then disappear. One reason is I usua...
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oceanpine
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4
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295
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Healthy Socializing?
(Preview)
Just wanted to share about this to work through some things. We went to a wedding yesterday. It was for the daughter of of one of my former coworkers. My recovering abf is trying to get more accustomed to being in the presence of alcohol and being ok with it. So we're seated with some strangers who were als...
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tiredtonite
|
5
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448
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really need to get well
(Preview)
I went back to the doctors. The last one was dismissive,your stressed,stop it. Yeah,that's gonna happen. I've been attending meetings online, I need a sponsor,I'm praying. Today I found another quack,he was kindly. He prescribed meds. I feel upset but I also know this hsomething I sadly need for th...
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aquamom23
|
7
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502
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The program sinks in
(Preview)
So I picked up a 6 year medallion at one of the groups I used to attend in my first year. Yes, it's AA, but it's still the 12 steps and the journey is not so different, as I was leaving an A at the same time and working on tremendous codependency issues also. In any case, the overwhelming feedback from all th...
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pinkchip
|
21
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644
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|
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Al-Anon helps me
(Preview)
I've been in Al-Anon just a little over 2 years. August was my birthday month. I just have to say, that the experience, strength and hope I get from the program and the people of the program are just great. It's a day at time but just for today it's a good day. I wanted to share what I shared at my meeting and to...
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alwaysLP13
|
6
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4324
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new here..very new
(Preview)
Ive been on another site for 3 years..It was an infidelity site..Now our lives have shifted once again...ANd I no longer belong there...I have for the last 6 years, gone thru every emotion imagineable. Trying desperately to figure out why my marriage was falling apart. Why I no longer recognized my H...
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one and only
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9
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454
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Drama and flirting
(Preview)
Some days, like today, I find myself feeling angry towards everyone. I just get sick of the same things over and over. I am realizing my best friend and her issues with her son are driving me nuts. Long story short, he is almost 18 and under house arrest with an ankle bracelet for drug possession. He is t...
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Newlife girl
|
4
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486
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|
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Forgiveness
(Preview)
I am working on forgiveness for my dry ah. First i need to forgive myself for my own past sins then forgive my ah for his current sins of adultery. I need to do this to move on, i will forgive him and hand him over to the care of God To deal with Him.I can not sit in judgement of AH it is not my job. i am doing this...
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Mirandac
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16
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496
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