Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

TXSusan · TXSusan

After 3 years in AlAnon, you'd think by now the amazement would wear off of how meetings seem to be "just what I need to hear", and now after spending the morning on the message board, "just what I needed to read." My AH crossed what I thought was the final line last week. In an alcoholic rag...

BnA2006 · BnA2006

I do not in anyway mean to ask that with any sarcasm!!! I just wanted to say that first:) I've only just recently discovered this wonderful board, so naturally I don't know everyone's story. As far as I can see though, I've read none that have happy endings with their A. Please please feel free to c...

albertarose · albertarose

I am having difficulties with my distorted thinking. It's getting in the way and I find myself consumed with negative thoughts about my Sober "A". I want it to stop but I don't know how to stop it. When I feel this mood coming on I read my litature, talk to an alanon member, my counselor. I meditate, say my s...

bear · bear

I'm new to this board but have spent the whole day and night reading everything that I can possibly find on the subject of a being a partner of a AH. I'm going to my first al-anon meeting on thursday night as I realise that enough is enough and I really must get support for myself before I end up having a bre...

omajoy · omajoy

My husband said to me today: IS there ever a day when he (our son) doesn't have some trauma or drama going on?.....my response was, of course, NO. He leans toward chaos in his life; whether the situation is trivial or huge, all the same. It tires us out so much. I have been thinking the last hour or so...

Diva · Diva

I do not fit that mold, and so it causes me to wonder why the vast majority of people here take life's little bumps to the extreme. Each of us has a BIG bump to deal with, but that should not close our eyes to the fact that we should choose our battles carefully, and think of the consequences before we jump hea...

Christy · Christy

OK, so we didn't quite skirt the storm unscathed. Son got in an accident this afternoon. He's fine but his little red car isn't, but it's drivable, just pretty caved in..lol. It's still pretty treacherous out there. Let's see, in one week..son chopped finger with axe, worst ice storm in 30 yrs. son w...

purplebutterfly · purplebutterfly

My A makes me feel guilty so much. Guilts me into not calling my own mom cause mom hurt me growing up. the harrassess me after i call. liike saying i said things i shouldnt have. which isnt true then turns around and checks to see when i called hher on the phone bill that i pay. . Im tired o...

ally · ally

((((((((((((((ROOMIES))))))))))))) I recently suffered a bout of depression, I was off my work for nine weeks. I was given anti-depressants from my doctor. I took them for a few weeks. But I deceided, the last time I had them I was on them for three years. So, I could fight back without them. I grad...

mama_nz · mama_nz

Last night I watched a documentary about the Heavy Metal Band Metallica - it documented the band trying to stay together and put out a new album while their frontman went into rehab for alcohol and 'other unamed' addictions, mainly alcohol. I was actually really touched seeing the transforma...

chris52 · chris52

Seriously..............I wonder about this????? Why is it I have changed my mobile(cell)phone number..............changed my email address..............got a house phone showing caller ID( Usefull,except where caller ID is withheld,or is international call)........why Is it that when...

kerry5 · kerry5

Agenda for Wednesday December 6th 2006 Group Business Meeting at 7pm est New comers MEeting update Schedule New Business Time change Sunday Meeting For group Business meeting New Mirc Chair/ Op Friendly Step Tradition Meeting Rotation Disucussion of New chairpersons to b...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello ((((((((((friends))))))))), Just sitting here thinking about things, and wondering how hard can an Addict hit his Bottom.....hub really took a turn for the worse....he stole his dads credit cards and went on a 3 day binge.....now he is homeless....no vehicle....no money....no resou...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I was at my f2f last night and at the closing we all hold hands and do the lords prayer so the math guy who has been tutoring me is on my right. about 1/4 thru the prayer he is stroking the inide of my palm and I FREAK OUT!! Internally of course. He is old enough to be my father and it felt to me...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, I have come much farther in my recovery than I even imagined.....I had a huge reality check yesterday....and I took the right path for me.... Well hub hit and he hit hard.....thought he could walk right back in this house because he had no where else to go....he was strung out, n...

Messy · Messy

Hey There - Well it seems that my 'A' has made his choice... alcohol... he has not been home for 3 days. Though, I must admit it has been a lot quieter in the house these days. Though it still hurts... I am trying to only deal with my side of the street and continue to live my life as nothing is w...

gardengal · gardengal

It is the time of year, where most people are under stress and obligation to get things done before the holidays, but toss your emotions while dealing with active alcoholism, and all of it can become totally overwhelming for us. Each of us who come to this site have been devastaed by someone else...

kissers · kissers

Sometimes I hear this and I feel very angry. My father was a violent alcoholic. He had a very sadistic side to him. He would think it was funny when he would grab my legs and hold me under water then let me come up gasping and crying. What was my part in this? Not a damn thing. He was cruel and still is. I know he i...

Gailey · Gailey

I have posted before about my younger son (age 30) having a drinking problem. I don't want to label him as an A but I would say it is a problem. He is one that will drink on a Friday night and want to continue on when he wakes up on Saturday. By Sunday and probably thru at least Tuesday he feels like crap and...

Summer · Summer

My mother has been an alcholic... forever.. yet it only started 3 years ago when she began again now she is so far down she will clean up for 2 weeks.. then binge... drinking 20 in a night.. passing out.. but not until she become so mean... last night when i was out there she threatened to kill hers...

marty · marty

Hi all i am a alcoholic i been sober almost 17 years on 26 of this month i am riding a women to AA meeting,and i feel all she want is thing i dont know how to stop riding her how do you do it when you dont want to hurt there feeling,well i hope some one here has a ideal how to do this and i got two weeks here...

Tammy · Tammy

I havent posted in awhile I have been reading a lot of posts but for some reason haven't posted. Now, I really need some guidance, support and just to write down my thoughts... I kicked my husband out in September. He was drinking a lot and going out until all hours of the night with his buddies. I...

hersh · hersh

(((My friends))) I had an AHA moment that made me feel better today, and wanted to share with you all. My AH has been sober for a little over 30 days now, and it is better. He is feeling better, going to meetings, and really trying. It is hard to get my hopes up, but I am being wary.&nbs...

Maria123 · Maria123

These are just my feelings and "feelings aren't facts" My Alanon Alter Ego is talking to Maria But I guess today is the day that I feel like I'm in "it" alone. What is it? Well do you ever feel like it's always you making the phone calls to say hello? Do you ever feel like it's only you who remembers s...

laurab · laurab

My A son in Florida keeps calling, crying and begging me to front a ticket home for him. I have stood firm and said when I sell his car, which is advertised, I will get him a ticket, not before. He cries and says i have picked the wrong time to take a stand. He makes me angry, sad, hopeless, una...

rtexas · rtexas

Dear Rita, I am just mortified that it has taken over a year to get your home back together. Are they coming this week to get it going? You are such a good Mom and an inspiration here. My hope is they come through so you can enjoy your Christmas holidays in your new home. My prayers a...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Hope everyone is doing well. I haven't been able to post much. This is a very busy time of year for me at work so I have been replying a little when I have a chance and reading when I get a spare moment. I seem to be in kind of an emotional "never-never land". Its a pl...

kiwigrl · kiwigrl

I read a few topics on the message board before I decided to join. I went to my first Ala-non metting 2 nights ago. I have reached my bottom, for a year now I have been frustrated by the actions of my alcaholic but now I am ashamed of my own actions. I found myself sinking to his level and playing his games. I do...

jaja · jaja

.....seems like it sometimes. On the one hand, I was relieved when I first began to learn about alcoholism and it's effect on everyone involved. I was forever saying "Okay, I see now!" "Ah Ha! That explains it!" and stuff along those lines. Burdens were lifted. Then I go back into a slump like tod...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Every weekend my husband would be a DRAG, he wouldn't want to get up when I wanted him to, he wouldn't want to go do anything with the family he was ALWAYS "resting". He was grumpy and mean and nasty to everyone on his time off and I was always resentful that he wouldn't get up and be part of the family....

acjmom · acjmom

Hello All, I havent posted in awhile, but still read on here alot... it still helps to know there are others here living the same kind of life and wishing it was better. LOL Well, hubby is gone again...like thats a big surprise, but what does s...

acjmom · acjmom

Hello All, I have been doing alot of reading on here and alot of thinking and am wondering if an A can just not see what they are giving up..or do they just really not care?Time and time again on here I read that alls a non A wants is for their A to love them as much as they love thei...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((John)))))), Has there been a decision made about sending the holidays cards to the recovery house yet? Or is that part of the next business meeting this month! I'm still game for sending them out if anyone else is. Fingers crossed we'll be able to do it again, it was such fun! Ga...

chris52 · chris52

Hello again (((((((((((((((((wonderful people)))))))))))))))) Am so sorry it's been so long since I last posted. No puter and lousy internet access means I still get to read some posts but not a lot of time left to respond(Connection is very slow) even less to actually post. I did try a few times and t...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((((Rommies))))))))))))))))) Well I have been In Op Status for a few days now. I would just like to say,a Big THANK YOU,to you all. For welcoming me, and being patient with me. I chaired my first meeting and I was nervous, but also excited. I am talking the OP status as an honour, and I...

HereIam · HereIam

Surely lots and lots of alcoholic women keep right on drinking, pregnant or not. I know I was.

Lanchas · Lanchas

hey all. i can't remember if i told you but i'm back at school so it means im a little less available but if anyone needs me or needs to talk or vent or anything im here. Lanchas

Anonfornow · Anonfornow

I'll try to be very brief, I'm a 62 yr old woman, daughter of an alcoholic Father now deceased, sister to an alcoholic sister and brother. They both stopped drinking for several years but are both drinking again. My sister especially is a hard case, she drinks straight from the bot...

afmom03 · afmom03

Ok....everyone...(oh, by the way hello!!!)<LOL> I've been dying to get on this computer to tell ya's that the "stuff hit the fan" last night (understatement of course)!! hee hee...And you will have to be as proud of me as I am...not trying to b conceited here either, ok? My AH had got to the poin h...

afmom03 · afmom03

laurab · laurab

I am slowly feeling weaker and dropping down into despair. My A son started his new life in Florida just 13 days ago. 2 days ago he called to say he wanted to come home. I offered nothing. Today he called after a 2 day binge, sick and shaking and kind of crying saying it's toxic there and he must come ho...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Hi All--So, in my head again, really bad place to be, don't need any of you to tell me that, know that one by heart. Yesterday, got the tuition bill from the university, and my first reaction was yeah, okay, whatever. All the paper work is in order. And then it occured to me: Oh, fantastic. I have to g...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family)))))))), Another storm is working its way across the country. I'm in NY and we are predicting high winds (up to 50 mph) and up tp 2" of rain this afternoon. Right now it is 65 degrees and some dandelions have sprouted! Schools have dismissed early because of the c...

debilyn · debilyn

I reread my post guys. I meant I would go back and do the same thing, marry him and go thru it all!!! NOOOOOO I will NEVER be with this stranger, never. He is NOT who I married. I read that and wanted to barf!!

laurab · laurab

Today he called from Florida to say his separated from wife was arrested Wednesday night when the police raided her on and off boyfriend's house with warrent because they suspected he deals coccaine. They found 200 bags of heroin and other stuff. She was charged with a 5th degree felony and bailed out...

maresie2 · maresie2

I used to try to set limits with the A by screaming, going on and on about things and talking endlessly about what I would not do. Then I would inevitably renege and do it anyways. I would be rewarded for 10 minutes by his affection and appreciation then he would be right back to normal. T...

twinkie · twinkie

I'm having a hard time discerning this on. In healthy relationships, we have disagreements with others. We get hurt by what someone says or an action they may take. We may have a conflict. It is our responsibility to tell that person how we feel, isn't it? If the relat...

Mom2EB · Mom2EB

Lately I've been feeling a lot of resentment and anger towards my A. Last weekend I reluctantly agreed to go to a visit with her for the good of my child. However, I could not look my A in the eye and just felt mad the whole time I was there. She asked if we could hug and I tried to be polite and said "no thank you"...

debilyn · debilyn

My daughter read me this and it was an omg moment. This is so profound to me, so true. I almost have all of A's stuff gone. My son came over and scoped out the tools.... I knew tha that was that... haha but that way he did not freak too much when I asked him and his friend to get my hay and grain to the barn! smile...

mama_nz · mama_nz

Today I ended up calling the police on my ex. And it wasn't even to do with drinking. Though it may be related. Since the most recent 'lapse' I have started to take more of a stand against my ex partner (and A) and put more boundaries in place. I said to him I'm not going to tel...

Christy · Christy

(((friends))) Over the years in chat I've mentioned my "fatgirl" and shared pictures with my friends of my old sweet dog. Sadly, I had to put her down today. She was my constant companion through the years when my A lived on a bar stool. I'm not looking for pity by posting, but more to acknowledge h...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I work 4 days a week and every day that I am at work my kids are home alone for about 2 1/2 hours destroying my house. Every night when I get home I am yelling at them because I am so angry that my house is dirty and sometimes when they try to clean it's still never enough. I spend EVERY weekend clea...

Rita G · Rita G

Good Afternoon my MIP Family, I have been out of touch for a few days - I've missed all of you. Can you be filled with Joy & Sadness at the same time? I can. I am. They confirmed that Monday 12/4 our new home will finally be delivered. 15 months after Hurricane Rita dam...

BnA2006 · BnA2006

Its just been one of those weeks/ months! I feel as though i'm slowly going insane. I see from these boards that i'm lucky that my A is sober (for now) and in recovery. He's actually doing wonderful! I should be in a state of peace right now, knowing he's okay, and he's working his a$$ off to be well and take c...

gardengal · gardengal

Lately I have been struggling with 'something" ,,,,feeling blagh, feeling desparate, feeling lonely altho my family and friends surround me. I cannot pinpoint what the issue is that I should feel this way! I cannot understand why I have to pretend to be happy when I am with them while feeling out of so...

irish54 · irish54

Hi all, Thank you for those of you who responded to my post earlier. Since then, after much thought and prayer, I have taken my grandaughter to live here with me, hubby and other grandaughter. I don't know how things got so bad between her and her mother (my daughter) but they have.&nb...

hudsond · hudsond

O.k. for the past couple of days we have been posting about frustrations with children and taking anger out on them, and not having clean houses. Well so past couple of nights I have been trying to work one on one with my children in a chore--I tend to expect them to clean or put away whatever I want t...

FairyTales · FairyTales

You know when I first came into the rooms of Alanon a couple of years ago I was one of those that didn't think I had a problem. I didn't think I was the crazy one. My husband was the one who had the problem. In fact, If I were honest with myself, I still could not see how crazy I was until just...

maresie2 · maresie2

This past Wednesday at the online evening meeting the topic was Martyrdom and humility. I found some of the shares life changing. Of course I have been aware that martyrdom was a huge part in my relationship with the A. I also felt set up in it. And I am only beginning to se...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Sometimes our experiences in living around addiction can be helpful to us in places where we don't necessarily expect it..... I am a manager of a large workforce, and we would certainly have our share of addicts, alcoholics, etc., among the group..... One of the employees almost lost h...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Wavering on Leaving (Preview) After 3 years in AlAnon, you'd think by now the amazement would wear off of how meetings seem to be "just what I need to hear", and now after spending the morning on the message board, "just what I needed to read." My AH crossed what I thought was the final line last week. In an alcoholic rag...	TXSusan	6	362	Dec 6, 2006 by hudsond
	Is there anyone here with a happy ending? (Preview) I do not in anyway mean to ask that with any sarcasm!!! I just wanted to say that first:) I've only just recently discovered this wonderful board, so naturally I don't know everyone's story. As far as I can see though, I've read none that have happy endings with their A. Please please feel free to c...	BnA2006	19	589	Dec 6, 2006 by autumn
	HOw to Stop (Preview) I am having difficulties with my distorted thinking. It's getting in the way and I find myself consumed with negative thoughts about my Sober "A". I want it to stop but I don't know how to stop it. When I feel this mood coming on I read my litature, talk to an alanon member, my counselor. I meditate, say my s...	albertarose	7	437	Dec 6, 2006 by Rita G
	How did I get here? (Preview) I'm new to this board but have spent the whole day and night reading everything that I can possibly find on the subject of a being a partner of a AH. I'm going to my first al-anon meeting on thursday night as I realise that enough is enough and I really must get support for myself before I end up having a bre...	bear	12	472	Dec 6, 2006 by lovette
	the chaotic brain (Preview) My husband said to me today: IS there ever a day when he (our son) doesn't have some trauma or drama going on?.....my response was, of course, NO. He leans toward chaos in his life; whether the situation is trivial or huge, all the same. It tires us out so much. I have been thinking the last hour or so...	omajoy	1	225	Dec 6, 2006 by Rita G
	I find a common thread here on MIP. (Preview) I do not fit that mold, and so it causes me to wonder why the vast majority of people here take life's little bumps to the extreme. Each of us has a BIG bump to deal with, but that should not close our eyes to the fact that we should choose our battles carefully, and think of the consequences before we jump hea...	Diva	8	349	Dec 6, 2006 by Diva
	It's all good :) (Preview) OK, so we didn't quite skirt the storm unscathed. Son got in an accident this afternoon. He's fine but his little red car isn't, but it's drivable, just pretty caved in..lol. It's still pretty treacherous out there. Let's see, in one week..son chopped finger with axe, worst ice storm in 30 yrs. son w...	Christy	12	532	Dec 6, 2006 by Karilynn
	tired of feeling guilt / approval seeking (Preview) My A makes me feel guilty so much. Guilts me into not calling my own mom cause mom hurt me growing up. the harrassess me after i call. liike saying i said things i shouldnt have. which isnt true then turns around and checks to see when i called hher on the phone bill that i pay. . Im tired o...	purplebutterfly	1	237	Dec 6, 2006 by peewee
	ITS ALRIGHT TO ASK FOR HELP (Preview) ((((((((((((((ROOMIES))))))))))))) I recently suffered a bout of depression, I was off my work for nine weeks. I was given anti-depressants from my doctor. I took them for a few weeks. But I deceided, the last time I had them I was on them for three years. So, I could fight back without them. I grad...	ally	2	390	Dec 5, 2006 by peewee
	Seeing things from their point of view (Preview) Last night I watched a documentary about the Heavy Metal Band Metallica - it documented the band trying to stay together and put out a new album while their frontman went into rehab for alcohol and 'other unamed' addictions, mainly alcohol. I was actually really touched seeing the transforma...	mama_nz	0	278	Dec 5, 2006 by mama_nz
	Do"A's" have extra sensory perception????? (Preview) Seriously..............I wonder about this????? Why is it I have changed my mobile(cell)phone number..............changed my email address..............got a house phone showing caller ID( Usefull,except where caller ID is withheld,or is international call)........why Is it that when...	chris52	6	380	Dec 5, 2006 by mama_nz
	Business Meeting Wedsnesday Debember 6th Agenda (Preview) Agenda for Wednesday December 6th 2006 Group Business Meeting at 7pm est New comers MEeting update Schedule New Business Time change Sunday Meeting For group Business meeting New Mirc Chair/ Op Friendly Step Tradition Meeting Rotation Disucussion of New chairpersons to b...	kerry5	0	229	Dec 5, 2006 by kerry5
	How Hard can an Addict Hit???? (Preview) Hello ((((((((((friends))))))))), Just sitting here thinking about things, and wondering how hard can an Addict hit his Bottom.....hub really took a turn for the worse....he stole his dads credit cards and went on a 3 day binge.....now he is homeless....no vehicle....no money....no resou...	Andrea12	20	626	Dec 5, 2006 by Mobirdie
	A strange thing happened at the Alanon meeting.... (Preview) I was at my f2f last night and at the closing we all hold hands and do the lords prayer so the math guy who has been tutoring me is on my right. about 1/4 thru the prayer he is stroking the inide of my palm and I FREAK OUT!! Internally of course. He is old enough to be my father and it felt to me...	carolinagirl	6	343	Dec 5, 2006 by Kethry
	HUGE FOR ME (Preview) Hello Friends, I have come much farther in my recovery than I even imagined.....I had a huge reality check yesterday....and I took the right path for me.... Well hub hit and he hit hard.....thought he could walk right back in this house because he had no where else to go....he was strung out, n...	Andrea12	15	494	Dec 5, 2006 by carolinagirl
	Advice, please.... (Preview) Hey There - Well it seems that my 'A' has made his choice... alcohol... he has not been home for 3 days. Though, I must admit it has been a lot quieter in the house these days. Though it still hurts... I am trying to only deal with my side of the street and continue to live my life as nothing is w...	Messy	8	493	Dec 5, 2006 by carolinagirl
	Time of year to truly embrace "Step One" (Preview) It is the time of year, where most people are under stress and obligation to get things done before the holidays, but toss your emotions while dealing with active alcoholism, and all of it can become totally overwhelming for us. Each of us who come to this site have been devastaed by someone else...	gardengal	2	369	Dec 5, 2006 by Tiger2006
	What is my part in it? (Preview) Sometimes I hear this and I feel very angry. My father was a violent alcoholic. He had a very sadistic side to him. He would think it was funny when he would grab my legs and hold me under water then let me come up gasping and crying. What was my part in this? Not a damn thing. He was cruel and still is. I know he i...	kissers	12	443	Dec 5, 2006 by HereIam
	A little ahead of the game this time. (Preview) I have posted before about my younger son (age 30) having a drinking problem. I don't want to label him as an A but I would say it is a problem. He is one that will drink on a Friday night and want to continue on when he wakes up on Saturday. By Sunday and probably thru at least Tuesday he feels like crap and...	Gailey	1	361	Dec 5, 2006 by Rita G
	Love in pain (Preview) My mother has been an alcholic... forever.. yet it only started 3 years ago when she began again now she is so far down she will clean up for 2 weeks.. then binge... drinking 20 in a night.. passing out.. but not until she become so mean... last night when i was out there she threatened to kill hers...	Summer	4	299	Dec 5, 2006 by Rita G
	how can i (Preview) Hi all i am a alcoholic i been sober almost 17 years on 26 of this month i am riding a women to AA meeting,and i feel all she want is thing i dont know how to stop riding her how do you do it when you dont want to hurt there feeling,well i hope some one here has a ideal how to do this and i got two weeks here...	marty	2	313	Dec 5, 2006 by Lunamoth
	I need HELP, please !! (Preview) I havent posted in awhile I have been reading a lot of posts but for some reason haven't posted. Now, I really need some guidance, support and just to write down my thoughts... I kicked my husband out in September. He was drinking a lot and going out until all hours of the night with his buddies. I...	Tammy	8	413	Dec 4, 2006 by whitie
	They are lost...!!! (Preview) (((My friends))) I had an AHA moment that made me feel better today, and wanted to share with you all. My AH has been sober for a little over 30 days now, and it is better. He is feeling better, going to meetings, and really trying. It is hard to get my hopes up, but I am being wary.&nbs...	hersh	9	452	Dec 4, 2006 by lin0606
	do you ever feel you are in "it" alone? (Preview) These are just my feelings and "feelings aren't facts" My Alanon Alter Ego is talking to Maria But I guess today is the day that I feel like I'm in "it" alone. What is it? Well do you ever feel like it's always you making the phone calls to say hello? Do you ever feel like it's only you who remembers s...	Maria123	14	4111	Dec 4, 2006 by lmt123
	1200 miles apart doesn't help one bit (Preview) My A son in Florida keeps calling, crying and begging me to front a ticket home for him. I have stood firm and said when I sell his car, which is advertised, I will get him a ticket, not before. He cries and says i have picked the wrong time to take a stand. He makes me angry, sad, hopeless, una...	laurab	6	384	Dec 4, 2006 by Christy
	Rita.... Did you get a great big package delivered today? (Preview) Dear Rita, I am just mortified that it has taken over a year to get your home back together. Are they coming this week to get it going? You are such a good Mom and an inspiration here. My hope is they come through so you can enjoy your Christmas holidays in your new home. My prayers a...	rtexas	1	247	Dec 4, 2006 by Rita G
	Bittersweet weekend... (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Hope everyone is doing well. I haven't been able to post much. This is a very busy time of year for me at work so I have been replying a little when I have a chance and reading when I get a spare moment. I seem to be in kind of an emotional "never-never land". Its a pl...	rtexas	3	242	Dec 4, 2006 by Rita G
	New to the Forum (Preview) I read a few topics on the message board before I decided to join. I went to my first Ala-non metting 2 nights ago. I have reached my bottom, for a year now I have been frustrated by the actions of my alcaholic but now I am ashamed of my own actions. I found myself sinking to his level and playing his games. I do...	kiwigrl	12	618	Dec 4, 2006 by kiwi sweetie
	ignorance is bliss... (Preview) .....seems like it sometimes. On the one hand, I was relieved when I first began to learn about alcoholism and it's effect on everyone involved. I was forever saying "Okay, I see now!" "Ah Ha! That explains it!" and stuff along those lines. Burdens were lifted. Then I go back into a slump like tod...	jaja	4	322	Dec 4, 2006 by jaja
	I always thought it was me! (Preview) Every weekend my husband would be a DRAG, he wouldn't want to get up when I wanted him to, he wouldn't want to go do anything with the family he was ALWAYS "resting". He was grumpy and mean and nasty to everyone on his time off and I was always resentful that he wouldn't get up and be part of the family....	carolinagirl	1	325	Dec 4, 2006 by rtexas
	Am I crazy or what? (Preview) Hello All, I havent posted in awhile, but still read on here alot... it still helps to know there are others here living the same kind of life and wishing it was better. LOL Well, hubby is gone again...like thats a big surprise, but what does s...	acjmom	2	295	Dec 4, 2006 by Maria123
	Just wondering (Preview) Hello All, I have been doing alot of reading on here and alot of thinking and am wondering if an A can just not see what they are giving up..or do they just really not care?Time and time again on here I read that alls a non A wants is for their A to love them as much as they love thei...	acjmom	2	257	Dec 4, 2006 by ShelBell
	Holidays Cards for MIP family (Preview) ((((((((John)))))), Has there been a decision made about sending the holidays cards to the recovery house yet? Or is that part of the next business meeting this month! I'm still game for sending them out if anyone else is. Fingers crossed we'll be able to do it again, it was such fun! Ga...	Karilynn	4	302	Dec 4, 2006 by carolinagirl
	Struggling with the guilt (Preview) Hello again (((((((((((((((((wonderful people)))))))))))))))) Am so sorry it's been so long since I last posted. No puter and lousy internet access means I still get to read some posts but not a lot of time left to respond(Connection is very slow) even less to actually post. I did try a few times and t...	chris52	7	382	Dec 4, 2006 by Karilynn
	THANKS TO EVERYONE (Preview) (((((((((((((((((Rommies))))))))))))))))) Well I have been In Op Status for a few days now. I would just like to say,a Big THANK YOU,to you all. For welcoming me, and being patient with me. I chaired my first meeting and I was nervous, but also excited. I am talking the OP status as an honour, and I...	ally	1	245	Dec 4, 2006 by belle1
	How many here were alcohol exposed pre-natally? (Preview) Surely lots and lots of alcoholic women keep right on drinking, pregnant or not. I know I was.	HereIam	0	210	Dec 3, 2006 by HereIam
	hey (Preview) hey all. i can't remember if i told you but i'm back at school so it means im a little less available but if anyone needs me or needs to talk or vent or anything im here. Lanchas	Lanchas	0	194	Dec 3, 2006 by Lanchas
	How can I help my Sister? (Preview) I'll try to be very brief, I'm a 62 yr old woman, daughter of an alcoholic Father now deceased, sister to an alcoholic sister and brother. They both stopped drinking for several years but are both drinking again. My sister especially is a hard case, she drinks straight from the bot...	Anonfornow	3	369	Dec 3, 2006 by Anonfornow
	HP Opens Another Door!!! (Preview) Ok....everyone...(oh, by the way hello!!!)<LOL> I've been dying to get on this computer to tell ya's that the "stuff hit the fan" last night (understatement of course)!! hee hee...And you will have to be as proud of me as I am...not trying to b conceited here either, ok? My AH had got to the poin h...	afmom03	1	285	Dec 3, 2006 by Christy
	Learning The Hard Way/grrrrrr! (Preview)	afmom03	5	362	Dec 3, 2006 by marmare
	Please help me do right!!!!!!!!! (Preview) I am slowly feeling weaker and dropping down into despair. My A son started his new life in Florida just 13 days ago. 2 days ago he called to say he wanted to come home. I offered nothing. Today he called after a 2 day binge, sick and shaking and kind of crying saying it's toxic there and he must come ho...	laurab	11	504	Dec 3, 2006 by maresie2
	And the spinning begins again.... (Preview) Hi All--So, in my head again, really bad place to be, don't need any of you to tell me that, know that one by heart. Yesterday, got the tuition bill from the university, and my first reaction was yeah, okay, whatever. All the paper work is in order. And then it occured to me: *Oh, fantastic. I have to g...*	Tiger2006	5	404	Dec 3, 2006 by maresie2
	Another storm (Preview) ((((((((Family)))))))), Another storm is working its way across the country. I'm in NY and we are predicting high winds (up to 50 mph) and up tp 2" of rain this afternoon. Right now it is 65 degrees and some dandelions have sprouted! Schools have dismissed early because of the c...	Karilynn	7	299	Dec 2, 2006 by ZiggyDoodles
	BIG OOPS!! P.S. (Preview) I reread my post guys. I meant I would go back and do the same thing, marry him and go thru it all!!! NOOOOOO I will NEVER be with this stranger, never. He is NOT who I married. I read that and wanted to barf!!	debilyn	2	308	Dec 2, 2006 by ZiggyDoodles
	next chapter in Joe drinks & Mom stays strong (Preview) Today he called from Florida to say his separated from wife was arrested Wednesday night when the police raided her on and off boyfriend's house with warrent because they suspected he deals coccaine. They found 200 bags of heroin and other stuff. She was charged with a 5th degree felony and bailed out...	laurab	2	401	Dec 2, 2006 by Andrea12
	Different ways of setting limits (Preview) I used to try to set limits with the A by screaming, going on and on about things and talking endlessly about what I would not do. Then I would inevitably renege and do it anyways. I would be rewarded for 10 minutes by his affection and appreciation then he would be right back to normal. T...	maresie2	6	352	Dec 2, 2006 by Andrea12
	When are disagreements healthy and when are they part of the disease? (Preview) I'm having a hard time discerning this on. In healthy relationships, we have disagreements with others. We get hurt by what someone says or an action they may take. We may have a conflict. It is our responsibility to tell that person how we feel, isn't it? If the relat...	twinkie	5	373	Dec 2, 2006 by lin0606
	Resentment (Preview) Lately I've been feeling a lot of resentment and anger towards my A. Last weekend I reluctantly agreed to go to a visit with her for the good of my child. However, I could not look my A in the eye and just felt mad the whole time I was there. She asked if we could hug and I tried to be polite and said "no thank you"...	Mom2EB	5	416	Dec 2, 2006 by Mobirdie
	Great analogy of how the A disease pulls us down. (Preview) My daughter read me this and it was an omg moment. This is so profound to me, so true. I almost have all of A's stuff gone. My son came over and scoped out the tools.... I knew tha that was that... haha but that way he did not freak too much when I asked him and his friend to get my hay and grain to the barn! smile...	debilyn	6	417	Dec 2, 2006 by Busbe
	Pushed to the edge (Preview) Today I ended up calling the police on my ex. And it wasn't even to do with drinking. Though it may be related. Since the most recent 'lapse' I have started to take more of a stand against my ex partner (and A) and put more boundaries in place. I said to him I'm not going to tel...	mama_nz	2	318	Dec 2, 2006 by Mobirdie
	For my friends that knew Gracie (fatgirl) (Preview) (((friends))) Over the years in chat I've mentioned my "fatgirl" and shared pictures with my friends of my old sweet dog. Sadly, I had to put her down today. She was my constant companion through the years when my A lived on a bar stool. I'm not looking for pity by posting, but more to acknowledge h...	Christy	21	571	Dec 2, 2006 by drucilla06
	Taking Frustrations out on Kids...Advice? Experience? (Preview) I work 4 days a week and every day that I am at work my kids are home alone for about 2 1/2 hours destroying my house. Every night when I get home I am yelling at them because I am so angry that my house is dirty and sometimes when they try to clean it's still never enough. I spend EVERY weekend clea...	carolinagirl	25	724	Dec 2, 2006 by mama_nz
	Filled with Joy & Sadness (Preview) Good Afternoon my MIP Family, I have been out of touch for a few days - I've missed all of you. Can you be filled with Joy & Sadness at the same time? I can. I am. They confirmed that Monday 12/4 our new home will finally be delivered. 15 months after Hurricane Rita dam...	Rita G	5	442	Dec 1, 2006 by Tiger2006
	I just need someone to say "I understand... it will be okay" (Preview) Its just been one of those weeks/ months! I feel as though i'm slowly going insane. I see from these boards that i'm lucky that my A is sober (for now) and in recovery. He's actually doing wonderful! I should be in a state of peace right now, knowing he's okay, and he's working his a$$ off to be well and take c...	BnA2006	17	1111	Dec 1, 2006 by Mom2EB
	How does one deal with something when you dont know what that "something" is? (Preview) Lately I have been struggling with 'something" ,,,,feeling blagh, feeling desparate, feeling lonely altho my family and friends surround me. I cannot pinpoint what the issue is that I should feel this way! I cannot understand why I have to pretend to be happy when I am with them while feeling out of so...	gardengal	7	401	Dec 1, 2006 by Jennifer
	14 yr old grandaughter (Preview) Hi all, Thank you for those of you who responded to my post earlier. Since then, after much thought and prayer, I have taken my grandaughter to live here with me, hubby and other grandaughter. I don't know how things got so bad between her and her mother (my daughter) but they have.&nb...	irish54	8	536	Dec 1, 2006 by irish54
	Chores (Preview) O.k. for the past couple of days we have been posting about frustrations with children and taking anger out on them, and not having clean houses. Well so past couple of nights I have been trying to work one on one with my children in a chore--I tend to expect them to clean or put away whatever I want t...	hudsond	7	261	Dec 1, 2006 by lin0606
	My Insanity (Preview) You know when I first came into the rooms of Alanon a couple of years ago I was one of those that didn't think I had a problem. I didn't think I was the crazy one. My husband was the one who had the problem. In fact, If I were honest with myself, I still could not see how crazy I was until just...	FairyTales	5	268	Dec 1, 2006 by nmike
	martyrdom (Preview) This past Wednesday at the online evening meeting the topic was Martyrdom and humility. I found some of the shares life changing. Of course I have been aware that martyrdom was a huge part in my relationship with the A. I also felt set up in it. And I am only beginning to se...	maresie2	1	294	Dec 1, 2006 by Lunamoth
	Interesting work development (Preview) Sometimes our experiences in living around addiction can be helpful to us in places where we don't necessarily expect it..... I am a manager of a large workforce, and we would certainly have our share of addicts, alcoholics, etc., among the group..... One of the employees almost lost h...	canadianguy	3	381	Dec 1, 2006 by maresie2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.