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the elephant left the room
(Preview)
Hi Friends, I'm numb and apalled, but relieved. My AH decided to take Father's Day as the opportunity to tell his children about his girlfriend. Yep, Father's Day, the day designed to celebrate the one who is the leader and protector of his family. What an idiot! As we were driving out of town tonight...
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Loupiness
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7
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930
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Fathers Day experiences
(Preview)
Aloha All. Happy Fathers Day to those of you who are qualified especially for the gals who are doing double duty. I kinda forgot it was Fathers Day even though the family started the celebration yesterday at the zoo. Three sons and a daughter doing double duty for now as her pilot husband just returne...
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Jerry F
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6
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494
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doing a 4th step
(Preview)
I am working on my 4th step which given I have been here 2/3 years is something. I am really finding it hard going as I'm now aware how much my people pleasing cost me and what a set up it was for me. I feel pretty raw about it. I also feel kind of stuck where I am. I am not making enough money and in theory would b...
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maresie
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4
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488
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Hey Karilyn!
(Preview)
My kitties are doing well..except one who had an ingrown nail. She is doing well after a trip to the Vet and some antibiotics that we have to give her! She does like it but it smells like bubblegum or something like that! Anyway, I hope it is ok to send you a direct post. I wanted to make sure you got this mes...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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321
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Hi! New and glad to be here
(Preview)
Hi everyone! I am so happy to have found this board. I have been reading the posts and I don't feel alone anymore. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one in the world going through this. My husband is an addict. Mainly alcohol and rx pain pills, but what I'm learning is that he will abuse anything he can...
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JDel
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7
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650
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wondering if I should even be here
(Preview)
Hi to the group! So, I'm worried. I'm worried about my boyfriend. We've been dating for 8 months and I thought I'd found the one. I still think he's for me. However, the last couple months have been a roller coaster. We moved in together in April and now summer has begun (I'm a school teacher) and I'm...
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worriedgirl
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5
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563
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Feels Like A Lost Cause
(Preview)
My boyfriend is an Ah. I love him dearly. I have recently informed him that I couldn't deal with it anymore. It refering to coming home every night and wondering weather or not at one point or another he'd be standing over me yelling, cursing, and screaming. Basically I gave him a choice. He made a doctor...
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dlookeast
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3
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687
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Suzannah
(Preview)
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debilyn
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0
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270
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HAVING TESTS AND NEED PRAYERS
(Preview)
((((Family))))) Hubby and I went for our annual physical this week. The doctor found that hubby's blood pressure was elevated. Hubby has had high blood pressure, but the doctor also found that mine was elevated too. I have never had high blood pressure before. The doctor has ordered some tests for bo...
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cookie1971
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2
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441
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For My Dad
(Preview)
For my Dad....... I wanted to do something special today for my dad. I wanted to try to express what he means to me now and how I feel about him. The obvious starting place is that without him..with a little help from my mom too of course, I would not exist. And I also believe "The King" my HP, has e...
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david62
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9
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480
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Coming Home
(Preview)
Hello Friends, Tonight I took a journey back to the room where I have met some wonderful friends over these few years. It felt like coming home everyone was so very warm and welcoming. It was absolutely wonderful. Sometimes along the road of Life, we can get lost, confused and just down right depre...
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Andrea12
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6
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370
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family weekend
(Preview)
My husband, our son and his child, and I spent Father's Day weekend in a condo on a lovely beach. It was an attempt at celebrating a family holiday in a different way. My son continues to grieve over his now two-year old divorce...something he did not want but couldn't stop. His grief and depression...
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joyoma
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1
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327
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I find Father's Day a thoughtful time for me...
(Preview)
Hello All, I find Father's Day a thoughtful time for me because I am 'not' in contact with my father. I send photos of my son two times a year at Christmas and at his birthday. Since he is just two this year this is a fairly new idea I have had. I got the idea from someone in AA to send photos. Both my parents...
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junehouse
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2
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385
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sons like fathers??
(Preview)
As I was saying my son treats me like his A father did to me. I have told my some I am not afraid physcially-but mentainally an emotionally.I have not heard back from him in this regard---but no more playing tag on the internet with him. Enough already. I am really sticking to my boundaries....I am reall...
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meagain
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2
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389
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HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TO MIP DADS!
(Preview)
(((((MIP Dads))))), To my MIP Dads: HAPPY FATHER'S DAY! I thank you for all your love, strength and laughs you have given us. You are indeed a special bunch of men. I may tease you lots, but it comes from the . May your day be extra special filled with love and laughter. Do the things you and spend them...
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Karilynn
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2
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545
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What to do?
(Preview)
Hi, It is my first time posting. I am very concerned. I have been thinking of moving out of the house. But my A always changes my mind. Telling me that it is best for the family to stay together that it will hurt our 8 year old son, that it is best finanacially etc... However, I can't control my temper anymore...
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China
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7
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400
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The vultures fly
(Preview)
My A exhusband who I have been living with moved out a few weeks ago. He had been doing drugs instead of drinking because of an anklemonitor and really I think he left because he knew how bad he gets. I had noticed for the last few months he had been spending a sick amount of money and his cell rang at all hou...
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deecee6565
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1
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374
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Moms Surgery
(Preview)
As many of you may already know my mom found a lump on her breast and it was cancerous well today was day of surgery and a long one for my family, many prayers well wishes from so many people and from this family of mines also id just like to send many many thanks Surgery went well at night visit she was sitting...
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belle1
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5
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279
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I am back!
(Preview)
Well, I hope I was missed, HA! HA! Seriously I was forgetting to check in. I don't remember the last time I posted. I am doing pretty well.. I am enjoying the much needed sunshine. Lots of rain earlier. I am very sorry for all of you in areas of the country who have suffered from excessive heat, floodin...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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320
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elephant paints portrait
(Preview)
and now for something completely different... I saw this elephant on Animal Planet and found it so moving & beautiful, I thought it would be nice to share with all of you. I have never seen such a happy elephant in captivity before, truly amazing! http://www.treehugger.com/files/2008/06/am...
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kitty
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0
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300
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HELLO GUYS....
(Preview)
((((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) Was thinking about you all and i decided to drop by and say hi Hoping this finds everyone having the courage to change their lives into what they want it to be... Well the last three months i have had no Al-anon, i felt i needed some time to truely get to know myse...
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ally
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3
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312
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technical problems
(Preview)
I haven't posted in weeks due to technical problems I probably created all by myself. I haven't been able to log on at all. Finally, with John's e-mail of this week, I was able to make contact. Now it seems my screen name is "joyoma" rather than "omajoy"!!! Isn't that interes...
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joyoma
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3
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356
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HELP!! Can I get a sponsor online?
(Preview)
Hi, I really need a sponsor and I was wondering if I can get one online? Or do I have to go to a live meeting to get one. Please let me know. I do not have an alcoholic in my family but my father (who died in 1995) was a ragoholic. He is still haunting me. My biggest problem is my weight. He always made fun of m...
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madonna
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9
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1110
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yay!!
(Preview)
Hi! Today my daughter and I peeled and cut potatoes together and I enjoyed it! More importantly, I felt like an adult! I just thought I'd share. Later Danette
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seekingserenity
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1
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242
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HAPPY FATHERS DAY AND A "THANK YOU" TO MY DAD
(Preview)
Happy Fathers Day to all MIP Fathers. A day to sit back and reflect not on mistakes we might have made, or things we wish we had done differently, but be proud of the opportunity we had to shape the lives of the ones we hold so dear. It is also a day to remember our own Fathers and all the things they did for...
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RLC
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1
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480
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Update
(Preview)
((((Family))), Thank you for your love and prayers this past week. It has really meant alot to me. Hubby does not know that I posted asking for prayers, but if he did I know he'd appreciate it too. We were suppose to go to the doctor's yesterday, but he wasn't into it. I can understand that. Who want t...
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Karilynn
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9
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433
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getting thrown under the bus
(Preview)
As I have posted, I have kept my private life very private. Given my life as it is and where it appears to be headed, I know it has been a good decision for me thus far. In this small town I am in, the privacy really kept the chaos at bay and has allowed me to move forward at my own pace. Other than immediate fami...
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Loupiness
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5
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569
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Lost Job
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I new here and needed some feedback. I went to an open talk tonight, Al-Anon. It made me think about how similiar my life is compared to the A. When they are drinking, they make a lot of bad decisions. Well, I was looking back on my life and see how many bad decisions I've made. I have the same di...
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notmywill
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3
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318
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so angery and Marriage therapy
(Preview)
just got back from our 3rd MT session, She said I still have to much anger at my ah, to keep comming back to the sessions, she said to my husband, can i do anything for you? I just walked out. Now i think he knows for sure i am crazy. All i do is just tare into him when i get there, i feel safe i don't confront him I am...
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charr
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8
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1328
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Variables of Recovery, Healing and Growth
(Preview)
When we enter the world of recovery so many dynamics come into play. Life continues to unfold. We still experience saddness, disappointments, frustrations, anger and fear. Many of us don't know where we will end up from here. Where we will live, where we will work, how we will take care of our famil...
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John
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5
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391
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We all got played
(Preview)
Well I'm back. Things were looking good for a while for my AD. He quit drinking for about two weeks knowing that I was coming with my wife and kids and his brother and hit wife. The whole Memorial Day weekend was really good. I talked with my Mom and she was telling me about here alanon meetings and that my AD...
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shawn306
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7
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756
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A is out of control again, i feel scared
(Preview)
i guess i should spell out the situation a little bit first. i live in public housing, fairly nice actually, but we do have problems. there has been a guy about 20 hanging around here - after a trespassing charge and restraining order - he's preyed on ateenage girl in the building before, and the rumor is...
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sadako
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5
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634
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I really need your help..................
(Preview)
My son and I have been battling back and forth thru email-----I shouldn't say battling---they will not pick up the phone, or email. Well yesterday DS called me and I mean he was VERy mad--just yelling at me on the phone. A month ago their marriage was over---now its turned around and I am the big blame fo...
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meagain
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4
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601
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Gilmore Girls
(Preview)
so, I've watched this show from time to time and the relationship that Lauralei has with Rory, mother and daughter respectively, has been one I've often been jealous of. Here's why, Lauralei has this completely dysfunctional relationship with her own mother but she is a good mom in the show. Now, I kn...
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seekingserenity
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2
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247
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having an online sponsor
(Preview)
I have an online sponsor. I went to the alanon online room and was in the chat alot. In fact I started with online before face to face. I got face to face sponsor she really didn't help me. I am not suggesting that face to face sponsor don't work I enjoy it, however there are some people that might do better wi...
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nycbt
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10
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780
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Excuses and Blame
(Preview)
Dear All, Today I got another doozie of an email from one of my bosses. He says his higher ups are making him do these things which involve changing the title of my job which was sanctioned by all these higher ups. I rang him back and was very direct. I told him I was insulted by the email and had not received a...
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maire rua
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2
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511
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I am a Grandma
(Preview)
Hello Friends, Been awhile since I posted. I have a beautiful baby grand daughter. She was born May 31, at 5:30 am. It was a little bitter sweet as I was thinking why couldn't my husband be here he would have been such a wonderful grandpap. Things for me have been pretty good, I still cry, I miss him. How...
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Andrea12
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9
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429
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He wants me to change.
(Preview)
My AH that I am divorced from but have been living with for the past 3 years left under a rage, my interpretation, he felt guilty doing it in front of his family, his is that since his health is bad I have ignored him, wont help him financially for his meds and the kids get on his nerves. I use my tools everyday...
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deecee6565
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8
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644
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I'm new and needing input
(Preview)
Hi All, I'm new here, but I'm not new to Alanon, nor am I new to on-line support groups. Background: I've been with my AH for 23 years. When I was first w/him, he was actively drinking. I was a single mom of 3 kids, xh abandoned us and we haven't heard from him since, no child support, no nothing (and he wa...
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queenie105
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11
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580
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looking for nick 'Blessed'
(Preview)
anyone seen 'blessed' around or if you can read this yourself could u please leave a message id like to get in touch again belle1
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belle1
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0
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296
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vomitting blood
(Preview)
In the last few days, I've found out that (my step-dad) the A is vomitting blood daily, now. Not sure how long it's been happening. My mother mentioned it and it seems to have taken me a couple of days for it to really sink in. I knew he was bad, I know it's progressive. It is really sad to know he's at this s...
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kitty
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5
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437
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Sorry it's been a while
(Preview)
Hello everyone, So much has happened in my life since I was here last. Just to introduce myself to those of you who don't know me, I am a 34 yr old mother of 5 children and a wife to a wonderful man. I am also the daughter to a mother who is addicted to additions. Pills, alcohol, gambling, men, sex, internet, o...
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mamaof4angels
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1
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404
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Update...
(Preview)
Things have been mellow and good lately. A little snafu with the bank, and changing accounts but I'm hoping that will be resolved without too much chaos. Still don't know if daughter graduated middle school and apparently they won't tell us until everyone is gone for the summer which I take as a bad s...
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carolinagirl
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6
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325
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everyday's a new adventure...:)
(Preview)
SHAWNEE, Kan. - George Chandler says he didn't know a 2 1/2-inch nail was driven into his skull until his buddy spotted it stuck through his cap. Chandler said he felt only a sting. "It never did really what you call hurt," the Shawnee man said Wednesday on NBC's "Today." ADVERTI...
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Tiger2006
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1
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254
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Starting Over- Insecurity
(Preview)
Well, the A is still in jail and I am SLOWLY leaving him behind. I still talk to him, etc, but it is getting easier to not answer the phone. I am also seeing someone else. He is "healthy" in that he has a great job is respectful of me, etc. He pays a lot of attention to me, etc. He is recently di...
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Codependent
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4
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423
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Am I being to passive?
(Preview)
Hi all - My A has been drinking since he got out of treatment - first every couple months a relapse, then a month, two weeks, now the last two weekends in a row. I however feel fine (a major improvment). I don't even get mad anymore, I feel like "what's the use?". I know he's already beating hi...
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Beajour
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8
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687
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guidance needed
(Preview)
Hello everyone. I have a situation with my adult step daughter that I cannot figure out. I have been married to her father for 10 years now and during that time she has consistently treated me like the family skunk. I have stayed out of her way so that I didn't become a barrier to her relationship with...
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Minnehaha
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10
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370
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Meaning of..........??
(Preview)
My 35yr. old son accused me via internet that over the years I have said he has a "dark soul" I don't even know what that means. Does anyone else know?? I tried calling him and emailing him about it, but as usual like my other discussions about our delimma he will not talk to me. I am totally at a l...
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meagain
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4
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450
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So Good to Be Back- Question
(Preview)
It is so good to be back here. I finally have a computer that works and internet at home so I feel fully connected! In my last post I mentioned that I am trying to detach from my A in jail by getting back in the dating world. That being said I do still talk to the A and at times tell him about my new dating life. ...
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Codependent
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5
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623
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Insight needed
(Preview)
This is my first post here, but I could use some insight into my problem. Husband is currently recovering and has 3 years of sobriety in. Good news BUT - he has recently started going to meetings with increased frequency - not a bad thing. However, he is taking a woman who is also in the program with hi...
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painthorse60
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7
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416
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trust issues
(Preview)
Yes, its been one of those days. At present I am working on trying to recruit students to a good evening ba programme which will offer alternatives to studying entirely on campus. I have done a good job. Today my boss tell me my name is being mentioned too much and he has been advised to leave me out of repor...
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maire rua
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2
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397
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Back again
(Preview)
I just wanted to say hello , I have been away from alanon online for about a year. This is a different group and appears very nice and not religious like the other group I was with. I have been married to the A 26 years, but Im not here to talk about him, I have done alanon for a number of years and I hope I can sti...
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Bettina
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1
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379
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stop me before I shoot (a nasty email)
(Preview)
Hi Friends, Well, I received my son's report card today and I am not happy. So, I am typing out the grades to send to my AH and feeling kinda nasty. I've been so good (relatively speaking) in my actions and words and am just feeling the need to let my AH know I think he is a selfish b*****d. I want to tell him t...
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Loupiness
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8
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693
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Who got a new puppy recently?
(Preview)
I've been away for a while, but just got an invite (via e-mail from MIP) to come back!!! A while back someone said they were getting a new puppy. I cannot remember who it was, but I am wondering how it is going with the new baby? I am so happy to have been invited back... and anyone who hasn't yet tried the on...
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ESH
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3
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374
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It has been forever since I posted here
(Preview)
but I got an email today from the group and thought I should pop my head in. I read a lot here on my journey with my A. I cried so many tears, fought so hard, loved unconditionally, tried so hard not to blame. He died, almost a year ago now. He was drinking again, lying about it - I caught him at it again.. told...
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GreenGem
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4
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464
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new and scared
(Preview)
Too many stories to tell about how I got here, and I'm sure you've lived them all before, but this is the first time I'm seeking help. I do have a first appointment with a therapist next week, but something inside me can't wait. Long story short: My husband of 1 year is alcoholic. I guess he always has been,...
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jdspencer
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7
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449
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Unaware even still HP is there!
(Preview)
Sometimes HP gives us what we need, when we need it and we are not even aware. With my work I have recently encountered someone that is in charge of the system that pays me and makes referrals to me. I saw red flags the first meeting with him,instead of just walking away and not accepting business from his...
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glad
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1
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445
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Should I say anything or not???
(Preview)
Hello everyone!! AH is home from his stay in jail/work release. Has been since Saturday. He hasn't drank much, a couple beers the day he got home. Anyways, he tells me tonight "Just so you know, if I want to have a couple beers at night, I'm gonna." I tell him that I can't control what he d...
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tma0413
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11
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689
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Half hearted answer.
(Preview)
As previous post stated I told A B/F I could not live any longer with Active drinking without recovery program for both of us. Emotional distance. He stated he would go to AA and (sort of ) indicated he would try an AA related counseling program. ( I really didn't get a strong idea of what he thinks or feels...
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glad
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6
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423
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Sobriety
(Preview)
Sooooo.....this is sobriety? I don't know that I like it! My A's still pushing my buttons(I'm letting him!) He's done four weeks of rehab, four weeks ago and now he knows it all!!! I need to get more ftf meetings in. He is seeing problems that have always been there for the first time and wading in to fix th...
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paulaque
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4
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381
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