The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My boyfriend is an Ah. I love him dearly. I have recently informed him that I couldn't deal with it anymore. It refering to coming home every night and wondering weather or not at one point or another he'd be standing over me yelling, cursing, and screaming. Basically I gave him a choice. He made a doctors appointment for the 19th of this month. But I'm still at wits end. Some of the stuff he says...and what's worse...the next day he never remembers. I suppose I'm just looking for some support...and perhaps a little advise in controlling my own anger towards him.
Softly suggesting that you also find a therapist. Yellow pages, let yer fingers do the walking. I hope you have a therapy appointment for later this month too.
Best Regards, junehouse
__________________
One must always do what one thinks can not be done.
-Eleanor Roosevelt-
The best advice I could give is to find an Al-Anon meeting and quick , u do need support from people who have been where yur at . Booze talk hurts but it is just that booze . Not remembering is conviennt isn't it . There is nothing u can do about him , ultimatums dom't work threats dont work tears don't work shamming them dosnt work , every thing we do to try and fix this or control it is doomed to fail because we are trying to solve a problem that has nothing to do with us it is thier problem to fix so leave it with them where it belongs. Regardless of what he says YOU are not the reason he drinks , we are simply not that powerful - if we were we could make them quit . he drinks because he has a problem - period Louise
Thanks guys. I know I'm not the reason he drinks. He drinks because he's addicted. It has absolutely nothing to do with me. The good news is...he's set himself on a 6 beer limit, just until his appointment. I've suggest therapy, or even meetings. Both just get a head shake. He has admitted his problem to himself, and those around him. Which I believe is a very big step. But what he fails to realize...no doctor can fix it. It's something he has to take into his own hands and take control of. Sometimes, I just want to pull my hair out. I've never in my life dealt with a drinker, so it's confusing, and I'm still figuring out the do's and don'ts.
