The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Aloha All. Happy Fathers Day to those of you who are qualified especially for the gals who are doing double duty.
I kinda forgot it was Fathers Day even though the family started the celebration yesterday at the zoo. Three sons and a daughter doing double duty for now as her pilot husband just returned to Iraq. We luncheoned at the picnic tables prayed, talked and took a tour of the zoo. A couple of these fathers are just kids in large bodies playing with the animals and getting distracted by them as we walked along. I just love it!! I listen with my eyes and was hearing alot. I love the sound of love.
This morning my home meeting and a wake up call that is really was Fathers Day and I sat with the other recovering fathers and supported my own recovery. One of the fathers who's friendship I value highly is leaving in two weeks. I am grateful to have had him in my life and I love him. Another father who I sponsor in this program shared with me pictures of the now of his family and the condition the realtionships with his children was like 4 years ago. The now pictures were stunning and put a hint of unbeliev- ability on the past...however I know the truth because his wife is in this program and he decided 4 years ago as a addict/alcoholic to "back her play" and he surrendered at convention on April Fools Day. So laughable the metaphor heh?
Then there was the member who wished all the fathers a happy Fathers Day with tears in his eyes as he related that he just lost his father on May 5th of this year. His sadness called me up to stand behind him as he spoke and rub his shoulder. We should not let another feel alone in their grief when we have the opportunity to share it. A woman member after the meeting expressed how powerful it was to see a male comfort another male in his sadness. Is there a rule that says we must not? Did I not feel comfort and hope from the males in this program that stood by and with me as I struggled with letting go of my loved one, an alcoholic wife. Wasn't it a male sponsor, Bill S who attended to my pain while he himself was under the influence of chemo medication and dying from cancer? There is no rule that says I shouldn't only the fear of seemingly being strange...self centeredness.
Then the morning Al-Anon Meeting and sharing with the group one of the conversations I had with HP during a trip home from the office. Maybe it was around this time of year. I forget and I was thinking of my deceased natural father and my step-father and decided to ask my HP who was my real father. The response? "I am your father and your father's father and your step-father's father." I arrived at a higher level of understanding that my HP was Father of all. I am fully satisfied in that department and grateful. The walls have been razed. We are truely one family and it works best that way don't you think?
I am grateful for the vertical alignment as taught by my sponsors and the old timers. It was a very good weekend.
Wow that left me pretty speechless. I'm glad you had a wonderful Father's Day. A day at the zoo sounds like a wonderful time. Yes, Dads are kids at heart that's what we love about them. Never loose the child inside of you. Thank you for your loving and insightful post. Love and blessings to you and your family.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
"I am your father and your father's father and your step-father's father."
Amen, brother. What a beautiful share.
And thank you so much for your response to my share. You inspire me to take things to another level. I certainly don't know of any rule that says a man can't stand by and comfort another man. And I don't know of one that says we can't just give another man a hug when they least expect it! Thank you for that.
I also thank you for being here. Your posts are always so dignified and graceful. I am grateful you keep coming back.
My dear friend David said it just right...Your posts ARE always "dignified and graceful." You are an inspiration to me and countless others. So glad you had a good Fathers' Day. Thanks for sharing it with us.
My best wishes always,
Diva
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"Speak your truth quietly and clearly..." Desiderata
I love reading and thinking of the ESH from people who have walked a long path. It brings me back to center... perspective renewal.
As I was just thinking of how tough the next few months will be for myself, HP guides me to check in at this sight to lend me a hand. And here it is; a message of joy and hope... CJ, time to get humble, again. You have tools and skills, now, and as imperfect as life can be, you have what you need to maintain 'happy, joyous, and free'.
Thank you for your continued support, my friend. I needed your hand on my shoulder, today; and sure enough, I find it there, to guide my program and me. I've stopped going to the hardware store, yet, sometimes forget to reach out (instead of THINK my way to serenity... because that has really worked for me... haha). Happy 'Emotionally Available' Day to you, and brightest blessings.
Gratefully, CJ
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time to stop going to the hardware store to buy bread.
Thank you for sharing your little part of the world over there yonder. What a beautiful day all around, so filled with many blessings.
I am with all the others in that men supporting men in this fellowship. I have just such a few men in the program that are so supportive of each other and as I have shared with you also, I so appreciate the male perspective and learning from each of you who are demonstrative in your love in a very platonic, alanon way.
Thank you for sharing your love with me, with us.
Happy Father's Day Friend, love Maria
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
Thank you for that.
