Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jerry F · Jerry F

and as I was giving my youngest son his birthday hug and looking over his great wife and two lovely daughters I felt old and the lost for not being close to him for 18 years. I don't do remorse well so that is about all of it there. He came over for his brithday gift and some birthday cupcakes and to "...

inhisarms · inhisarms

Hi MIP family, Only a few months ago I did not know how I would survive without my ABF and today i realized not only have I survived, I have thrived. Spent a wonderful Christmas Eve with my kids and a coworkers family. Last minute they invited us over and we had such an amazing time. This morning my kids an...

momoftwins24 · momoftwins24

I have been reading over this forum for a few weeks now. I have debated whether or not to sign up. I know that I need help I need people who understand what I am going through. I am married 30 yr old mother to two sets of twin girls. They are my life and my entire world. Their father is an alcoholic, he has b...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((((((Friends))))))), Merry Christmas to all of my wonderful MIP family, The highs are I am alive, It is 7 am and I am patiently awaiting for my g=daughter to get out of bed...I am so excited for her that I am about to go kiss her awake....lol she is 18 months old this year and OMG she is going to be smiles f...

Hawk120025 · Hawk120025

I've been posting now for about 5 months and one thing has really stood out to me - women really struggle with leaving the relationship. Why? Why do you feel you aren't worthy of something better? Why do continue to put up with the A behavior? What are you afraid of that keeps you in such horrible rela...

mc3 · mc3

This is what last night talk with my AB truly felt like to me it was like the devil was staring right back into my eyes. We had talks before about his drinking he said hed try and do better so i stayed but this time omg! The hair stood up on the back of my neck and I'm still shaking. I asked for a sign from my HP wel...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I talked the the psychiatrist today and he said that they did the MMPI on her but haven't scored it yet. I also got a call from the therapist asking to change her from involuntary to voluntary commitment which I'm waiting for a call back from her to get more understanding as to what that would mean. The d...

Carol_Lynn · Carol_Lynn

Carol, Alanon. I am entering a new friendship with a woman. We are already very close and I've only known her two weeks. My known pattern is to not have any boundaries and to not expect anyone to treat me with respect. this woman is very open with me. She is in recovery. We talk about stuff. But I am waitin...

Diva · Diva

and a sincere wish for all the world's good things to each of you in 2010!!! Diva

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I'm in a place right now that I can't seem to get out of. Feel like I am in a 10 foot hole and I keep pulling at the mud on the sides to try and get out and more just keeps tumbling in on me......soon I think I may be buried alive. The Dr's office called today with the pathology report from my surgery, and told me t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

IT WILL BE A QUIET BUT NICE CHRISTMAS WITHOUT MY MOM THIS YEAR--I CONVINCED HER TO GO HOME FOR CHRISTMAS & SHE DID IT! THIS MAKES ME HAPPY BECAUSE LAST YEAR SHE ALMOST SINGLE-HANDEDLY RUINED MY DAY LAST YEAR--BUT I LET HER! I LEARNED FROM LAST YEAR THAT I HAVE TO CREATE MY OWN HAPPINESS. SOMEONE LI...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Just wanted to wish all my MIP friends a Happy Christmas and thank you all for being here when I needed you. Hope you will all still be here and willing to put up with me when I (inevitably) need you in 2010. Lots of love, Tish xx

pineapple · pineapple

My Christmas gift has been finding this forum yesterday. I am sure I'll be here often reading the posts and expressing my own questions and doubts (and maybe some triumphs). But for the first time in many months I feel hopeful and that indeed is a gift. Thank you so much.

Holly09 · Holly09

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL! Thank you to all the MIP family here that makes my sometimes unbearable life better! Have a safe holiday. Holly

belle1 · belle1

From Our House To Yours A Very Peaceful Christmas To Everyone

CJ · CJ

When I remember that each person is doing the "best" they can, I am able to forgive them and stay light and usually happy/fun. I also believe that if I'm worth being forgiven, so is everyone else I come into contact with, including toxic family members. If I'm finding behaviors hard to deal...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I just wanted to Thank those who took the time to read and respond to my post. As you can tell my life has been anything but "level" as of late and it seems that as soon as I try to pull myself up, something else is thrown back at me, but again I try to get up. Today started out with ripping loose some...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Good morning family, Just got a call from the county jail, seems my daughter got in a wreck last night. I didn't get all the details as only the first minute was free. Then I was prompted to enter my debit card to buy more talking time. Could it be....Some Alanon prompting???? I thought why should I pay...

Nodaybut2day · Nodaybut2day

My cell phone died on Sunday, after my visit with XAH. I didn't think to charge it up on Monday morning. I plugged it in Monday afternoon at work and forgot it there until this morning. This is what came up on the screen once I turned it back on: 5 text messages from XAH. Monday, 9:04 p.m. If you're awake, I re...

pineapple · pineapple

hello, I am new here and don't know where to start. I have finally realized that the man I live with is an alcoholic. At first I thought he just had a ¨problem¨ that he would sometimes drink too much. That would be like every 3 or 4 months. But it´s been getting worse and the past few months he goes on binges fo...

Maria123 · Maria123

Happy Birthday David !!! You are finally as old as I am It's a gift to me (ha ha) to have been part of your recovery. Hope your day is a great one, Maria

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Just wondering how to get rid of this feeling in the pit of my stomach that Christmas will all fall apart this year. My daughter and her fiance and my sister-in-law are all coming for Christmas lunch so should be jolly - but what if AH doesn't behave - what if he decides to be ill - needs to go to hospital or ma...

Rocky38 · Rocky38

Hi. MIP family. This is the flip side of my previous post. I would love to hear more from people who left and what the outcome was. Hugs Rocky

Gailey · Gailey

For the past couple of years I could depend on my son not drinking on the weekends while his daughters were visiting. I even said recently that he never drinks when they are coming up. Well, Friday he was drunk when I brought them to my house. I made him leave and go somewhere for the night. My husband took h...

Overcome · Overcome

Christmas can be a hard time of year for some because of bad memories, current alcoholic situations, financial hardships, struggles with the commercialism of the holiday or just an overabundance of "too much yuletide joy". I have put together a "Christmas Survival List" f...

ythannah · ythannah

Not even a week has passed since my post in Hollie's "Why do they stay?" thread about how I loved my ABF.... and I'm dumping him. I guess what I'm looking for is confirmation that I've done the right thing, and how to feel better about it. The backstory: I'm a child of two alcoholic parents. My...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I HAD ANOTHER HORRIBLE EXPERIENCE ON SAT. REMEMBER I SAID THAT THE WEEK WOULDN'T BE RIGHT WITHOUT A FEW BAD DAYS? WELL..I AM KICKING MYSELF FOR SAYING THAT NOW! WITHOUT TOO MANY DETAILS; SOME PEOPLE IN MY TOWN THINK I AM A THIEF AND THEY BELIEVE THAT THEY HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE THIS. I KNOW WHAT I DID &...

maresie · maresie

Today my TV blew out and I now have to go get another one even though my funds are low. Normally pre al anon this would be a huge crisis and I would feel like a victim. Today I see it as a task I have to do and one I can be quite good at. Obviously due to my limited funds I won't be getting a 40 inch screen but I will b...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Hi MIP family! Have missed you all tremendously! Sitting up is not the most comfortable right now so I will keep this brief and touch back later. The surgery experience from start to finish was a nightmare-which included waking up on the OR table, being dressed in someone else's underclothing, and c...

marmare · marmare

Haven't posted in so long. My AH has been for the most part in controlled drinking stage...the last year he has slipped more and more. I made the decision to move out of our home. When I told him in the begining of Nov. that I would be moving out come Feb or March ...he told me to GET OUT by the 1st of the year...

John · John

Still Amazed and Excited! 20 years laterReply Quote More Edit PostDelete PostBan IPReport Spam To celebrate an alcoholic that doesn't drink is like applauding a cowboy with hemroids for not riding his horse. When the darn things hurt enough and he has tried every way possible to ride without...

Overcome · Overcome

I have had several people request that I post my story so here goes: I myself did not grow up with alcoholic parents, but did have a very dysfunctional family in the way that we communicated with each other. There was much triangulation between my mom, my dad and me. My dad (probably a sober alcoholic) di...

Augustine · Augustine

This is my first time reaching out for help. After reading some of the posts I have to admit I am a litle intimidated. It's weird because on one hand I would have liked to think that I would never be in this position, but on the other hand I think I always knew I would. I am married to an unadmitted A and it is rea...

kerry5 · kerry5

I am having xmas eve tonight with my kids. As they will be with my ex this year for xmas. I will not be home in time to chair. if an op can please fill in.. thank you Kerry

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

My 40 yo A/DA son entered himself into detox and then rehab. I was quite proud of him for taking those steps and still am. He had been living with us for around 9 months with stipulations that we would support him in what he must do. Those stipulations were... Stay clean and sober Go to meetings regular...

belle1 · belle1

Lauras family have been told it could take weeks before they can release her body. Her hubby (sober A) hasnt yet found a way to tell the boys, reason being he admits to being a coward(his own words) and her death being on the 16th and oldest sons 11th birthday on the 20th and next is christmas ..bless him, g...

Jozie · Jozie

Surgery went well as well as it could, She is home however, She is still in Alot of pain, So any and All that could spare some more Prayers Please keep them coming... She is down & out and needs a MIP Uplift if you all could help out :o) If you could spare a message of love... Anything to help her get out o...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Went and saw AH at the prison sunday. When the visit was over, I got this rush of emotion. Started to cry as he hugged me goodbye. He said everything will be ok. He probably thought I was crying for him. I was crying because we will never be ok again, there is no we at all. That night I had dreams of someone tel...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

I was in an open AA meeting this morning - it's a step 10, 11, and 12 meeting, and it's my favorite one all week. :) This morning we were talking about Step 10. "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it." This has been on my mind a lot the last few days,...

3dogs · 3dogs

Hello, I am new here. My husband of 16 years is an alcoholic. I am at my wits end in trying to help him. I don't know what to do, but I know I will not leave. The drinking is progressively getting worse. He blames all of our problems on everyone but himself. The frustrating part is that I am graduate schoo...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Just got the call to tell me that surgery is tomorrow at 730am.....I am the first of the day-YEAH! Funny last night I started praying, asking my HP to please get me in there as early as I could, and I'd love to be first......that way it's not so long that I have to go without a drink (which is the HARDEST thin...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

The last couple of weeks have been a time of a lot of transformation for me. Well, basically since my ex boyfriend and I split up. I have had a lot of chaos at home related to the oldest and middle children and have been dealing with a lot of stress related to that. Also, going to school every other weeken...

fishinmama · fishinmama

I had posted in the past that due to some medical problems I can not drive right now. I live in a rural area and that makes it tough. Today though I get to get out. I am going to lunch with family and then hopefully stop by a good friends house. I am so excited since Thanksgiving the only place I have been is...

noclue · noclue

I have been reading a few post there was a comment about treating others better than yourself. This really hit home I'm guilty, I don't drink or drug I just don't have any desire. My wife on the otherhand who has been clean and sober for almost five years lives everyday to stay that way. When she first cam...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

My daughter is sobbing, grieving terribly for her cat. This cat was 20 years old and has been her comfort during the A's binges and rages. This cat has dried her tears with his fur, "kissed" (licked) her tears away and stood still while she sobbed into his fur, burying her face, hiding from...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha MIPers/Al-Anon Family Groupers...The consequence of practice is new found or in this case old found knowledge and awareness which is so supportive to ones recovery from the disease and its effects. I remember in early program reading from inside the ODAAT daily reader the wisdom of Dr. Har...

Ginger · Ginger

Hi, I am new here and looking for advise. I have been married 20 years, the problem began 6 years ago. My AH has had help and is in AA. A year ago I thought he reached his rock bottom, and has been sober until about 8weeks ago, when he fell of the wagon for the weekend. I thought when you hit rock bottom you were d...

scotslass · scotslass

Hi everyone im new to this forum have read it a few times thought id post i left my husband finally after 8 years of crap finding it very very difficult not to think about him wonder if hes drinking etc god only knows why but im angry i guess that ive left and hes still drinking what does it take him to stop he by...

rosielee · rosielee

before i de my request i want to fill you in ,y mum has been sober for 15 years but was drunk for 15 yrs before that- when she was drunk, shed go off on abusive ravings and ramblings for hours- it would start from the time she picked us up frm school to the time she crashed out late- we were withdrawn kids and sc...

intothewoods · intothewoods

I feel the need to tell my story, and I'm a writer so this is the easiest way for me to tell it. I'm not so much looking for advice as I am just needing to get this out. Maybe it's my way of telling my HP. If reading this gives you any insight you'd like to share, please do. And thanks in advance if you read the whol...

belle1 · belle1

My Friend Laura(35) Passed Away This Morning Fom Alchol And Pain Killers Abuse Leaving 2 Small Boys With CP 10&6 Yrs Old And Her Long Term Partner Her Organs Failed And Took Swelling On The Brain Which Gave Her Brain Damage Her Family Were Advised To Switch Off Her Life Support. Death leaves a hear...

layneee · layneee

hello.... i've shared serveral times on this site and recieved great words of widom and encouragment and I am more grateful than you could ever know.. this message is to say that my Abf passed away early sunday morning after a struggle with alcohol. He was 31 years old and the absolute love of my life. Ev...

John · John

Hello Fellow members! The outpouring of cards being sent to the MIP recovery homes, for the residents in them is absolutely amazing! The guys are so touched by what you have done. Every time I walk into one of the homes, someone pulls me aside to share one of the cards they have recieved. These are not...

Rora · Rora

I feel like Alanon is a good tool in recognizing some enabling behaviours and helping us to deal better in our relationships with an A, no matter if that relationship is a child, friend, parent, sibling, spouse, what have you. In my particular case, my A is a spouse, from whom I am separated. At this poi...

maresie · maresie

I know one reason I stayed with the ex A was that all his chaos, confusion, demands meant I could not focus on myself at all. In fact I really feel he felt that if I had a moment to myself it was somehow stolen from him. He complained when I was grieving about my mother's sudden death that I was not paying att...

Jen · Jen

I had a minor blowup with my mother this morning. She called to ask me about my A brothers check that our dad always sends for Christmas. I did not realise she was also going to invite me to a resentment. She is codependent, of course, and is very good at sending me these covert invitations to resentments....

shellyj123 · shellyj123

The last thing I wanted to do Friday night was go to my F2F meeting. I haven't been feeling the best physically, mentally or spiritually and the depression is soooo huge and overwelming right now, and didn't really want to rain on anyone else's holidays and good times. As I layed there in bed half asle...

john boy · john boy

T o start off I would like to wish everybody an early Merry Christmas , and a Happy New Year , I am going to pray for forgiveness to my hp ( god ) ! And pray for forgiveness for my X wife and her family and wish them a merry christmas and a happy new year also ! Mabe I'll luck out and my X wife will send me a christmas...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

I'm sorry - just need a bit of a (subdued) vent I now feel my AH is at the point of no return. He spends most of the time in bed, doesn't eat and only moves to drag himself to local shop for more fags and brandy. His only hope, I feel, would be a long spell in residential treatment which neither I nor the (UK) Na...

dori711 · dori711

Surprisingly my husband cut down on his drinking to weekends only. I was already thinking he doesn't have a drinking problem, but today his behavior was very agitated like it hurt his brain to cope even though he wasn't drinking. I spent all evening looking for some papers for him, and you would thi...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	He's 39 and going strong (Preview) and as I was giving my youngest son his birthday hug and looking over his great wife and two lovely daughters I felt old and the lost for not being close to him for 18 years. I don't do remorse well so that is about all of it there. He came over for his brithday gift and some birthday cupcakes and to "...	Jerry F	9	884	Dec 26, 2009 by Maria123
	Grateful for a small but peaceful christmas (Preview) Hi MIP family, Only a few months ago I did not know how I would survive without my ABF and today i realized not only have I survived, I have thrived. Spent a wonderful Christmas Eve with my kids and a coworkers family. Last minute they invited us over and we had such an amazing time. This morning my kids an...	inhisarms	4	936	Dec 26, 2009 by Maria123
	New here my story (Preview) I have been reading over this forum for a few weeks now. I have debated whether or not to sign up. I know that I need help I need people who understand what I am going through. I am married 30 yr old mother to two sets of twin girls. They are my life and my entire world. Their father is an alcoholic, he has b...	momoftwins24	3	913	Dec 26, 2009 by Overcome
	Highs and Lows of the Holiday Merry Christmas (Preview) ((((((((Friends))))))), Merry Christmas to all of my wonderful MIP family, The highs are I am alive, It is 7 am and I am patiently awaiting for my g=daughter to get out of bed...I am so excited for her that I am about to go kiss her awake....lol she is 18 months old this year and OMG she is going to be smiles f...	Andrea12	2	712	Dec 26, 2009 by Jerry F
	Why do so many women stay? (Men, too?) (Preview) I've been posting now for about 5 months and one thing has really stood out to me - women really struggle with leaving the relationship. Why? Why do you feel you aren't worthy of something better? Why do continue to put up with the A behavior? What are you afraid of that keeps you in such horrible rela...	Hawk120025	37	2010	Dec 26, 2009 by neshema2
	a conversation with the devil (Preview) This is what last night talk with my AB truly felt like to me it was like the devil was staring right back into my eyes. We had talks before about his drinking he said hed try and do better so i stayed but this time omg! The hair stood up on the back of my neck and I'm still shaking. I asked for a sign from my HP wel...	mc3	6	863	Dec 26, 2009 by neshema2
	Update (Preview) I talked the the psychiatrist today and he said that they did the MMPI on her but haven't scored it yet. I also got a call from the therapist asking to change her from involuntary to voluntary commitment which I'm waiting for a call back from her to get more understanding as to what that would mean. The d...	carolinagirl	4	782	Dec 26, 2009 by neshema2
	scared (of good stuff!) (Preview) Carol, Alanon. I am entering a new friendship with a woman. We are already very close and I've only known her two weeks. My known pattern is to not have any boundaries and to not expect anyone to treat me with respect. this woman is very open with me. She is in recovery. We talk about stuff. But I am waitin...	Carol_Lynn	4	730	Dec 25, 2009 by inhisarms
	Merry Christmas to you all.... (Preview) and a sincere wish for all the world's good things to each of you in 2010!!! Diva	Diva	3	672	Dec 25, 2009 by inhisarms
	Feeling like my faith is being tested, and I'm not sure I'm strong enough to pass....ESH needed (Preview) I'm in a place right now that I can't seem to get out of. Feel like I am in a 10 foot hole and I keep pulling at the mud on the sides to try and get out and more just keeps tumbling in on me......soon I think I may be buried alive. The Dr's office called today with the pathology report from my surgery, and told me t...	shellyj123	8	2091	Dec 25, 2009 by masspedirn
	CHRISTMAS W/O MOM! (Preview) IT WILL BE A QUIET BUT NICE CHRISTMAS WITHOUT MY MOM THIS YEAR--I CONVINCED HER TO GO HOME FOR CHRISTMAS & SHE DID IT! THIS MAKES ME HAPPY BECAUSE LAST YEAR SHE ALMOST SINGLE-HANDEDLY RUINED MY DAY LAST YEAR--BUT I LET HER! I LEARNED FROM LAST YEAR THAT I HAVE TO CREATE MY OWN HAPPINESS. SOMEONE LI...	Hoot Nanny	3	840	Dec 25, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	Happy Christmas! (Preview) Just wanted to wish all my MIP friends a Happy Christmas and thank you all for being here when I needed you. Hope you will all still be here and willing to put up with me when I (inevitably) need you in 2010. Lots of love, Tish xx	Tattyhead	3	557	Dec 25, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	My Christmas gift (Preview) My Christmas gift has been finding this forum yesterday. I am sure I'll be here often reading the posts and expressing my own questions and doubts (and maybe some triumphs). But for the first time in many months I feel hopeful and that indeed is a gift. Thank you so much.	pineapple	5	793	Dec 25, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	Merry Christmas (Preview) MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL! Thank you to all the MIP family here that makes my sometimes unbearable life better! Have a safe holiday. Holly	Holly09	3	535	Dec 25, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	Merry Christmas And Peace To All (Preview) From Our House To Yours A Very Peaceful Christmas To Everyone	belle1	3	618	Dec 25, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	Holiday, Family and Forgiveness (Preview) When I remember that each person is doing the "best" they can, I am able to forgive them and stay light and usually happy/fun. I also believe that if I'm worth being forgiven, so is everyone else I come into contact with, including toxic family members. If I'm finding behaviors hard to deal...	CJ	4	1051	Dec 25, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	Many thanks to my MIP family for the ESH (Preview) I just wanted to Thank those who took the time to read and respond to my post. As you can tell my life has been anything but "level" as of late and it seems that as soon as I try to pull myself up, something else is thrown back at me, but again I try to get up. Today started out with ripping loose some...	shellyj123	2	698	Dec 25, 2009 by shellyj123
	A call from the county jail - I am grateful for my alanon reaction (Preview) Good morning family, Just got a call from the county jail, seems my daughter got in a wreck last night. I didn't get all the details as only the first minute was free. Then I was prompted to enter my debit card to buy more talking time. Could it be....Some Alanon prompting???? I thought why should I pay...	fishinmama	6	1150	Dec 24, 2009 by White Rabbit
	A gift from my HP (Preview) My cell phone died on Sunday, after my visit with XAH. I didn't think to charge it up on Monday morning. I plugged it in Monday afternoon at work and forgot it there until this morning. This is what came up on the screen once I turned it back on: 5 text messages from XAH. Monday, 9:04 p.m. If you're awake, I re...	Nodaybut2day	2	704	Dec 24, 2009 by White Rabbit
	don't know what to do (Preview) hello, I am new here and don't know where to start. I have finally realized that the man I live with is an alcoholic. At first I thought he just had a ¨problem¨ that he would sometimes drink too much. That would be like every 3 or 4 months. But it´s been getting worse and the past few months he goes on binges fo...	pineapple	9	1011	Dec 24, 2009 by White Rabbit
	Today's Birthday Boy ~ David62 (Preview) Happy Birthday David !!! You are finally as old as I am It's a gift to me (ha ha) to have been part of your recovery. Hope your day is a great one, Maria	Maria123	10	924	Dec 24, 2009 by david62
	Worrying about Christmas (Preview) Just wondering how to get rid of this feeling in the pit of my stomach that Christmas will all fall apart this year. My daughter and her fiance and my sister-in-law are all coming for Christmas lunch so should be jolly - but what if AH doesn't behave - what if he decides to be ill - needs to go to hospital or ma...	Tattyhead	4	806	Dec 23, 2009 by Adelaide
	Should I stay or should I go? Please share your ESH on why you LEFT and what was the outcome for you? (Preview) Hi. MIP family. This is the flip side of my previous post. I would love to hear more from people who left and what the outcome was. Hugs Rocky	Rocky38	9	723	Dec 23, 2009 by Not2bforgot10
	NEVER SAY NEVER (Preview) For the past couple of years I could depend on my son not drinking on the weekends while his daughters were visiting. I even said recently that he never drinks when they are coming up. Well, Friday he was drunk when I brought them to my house. I made him leave and go somewhere for the night. My husband took h...	Gailey	4	835	Dec 23, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	My Christmas Survival list (Preview) Christmas can be a hard time of year for some because of bad memories, current alcoholic situations, financial hardships, struggles with the commercialism of the holiday or just an overabundance of "too much yuletide joy". I have put together a "Christmas Survival List" f...	Overcome	5	1352	Dec 23, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	Support Badly Needed (Preview) Not even a week has passed since my post in Hollie's "Why do they stay?" thread about how I loved my ABF.... and I'm dumping him. I guess what I'm looking for is confirmation that I've done the right thing, and how to feel better about it. The backstory: I'm a child of two alcoholic parents. My...	ythannah	10	893	Dec 23, 2009 by ythannah
	I WILL NOT PLAY "VICTIM" (Preview) I HAD ANOTHER HORRIBLE EXPERIENCE ON SAT. REMEMBER I SAID THAT THE WEEK WOULDN'T BE RIGHT WITHOUT A FEW BAD DAYS? WELL..I AM KICKING MYSELF FOR SAYING THAT NOW! WITHOUT TOO MANY DETAILS; SOME PEOPLE IN MY TOWN THINK I AM A THIEF AND THEY BELIEVE THAT THEY HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE THIS. I KNOW WHAT I DID &...	Hoot Nanny	3	1602	Dec 23, 2009 by Jerry F
	Living life on lifes terms (Preview) Today my TV blew out and I now have to go get another one even though my funds are low. Normally pre al anon this would be a huge crisis and I would feel like a victim. Today I see it as a task I have to do and one I can be quite good at. Obviously due to my limited funds I won't be getting a 40 inch screen but I will b...	maresie	3	1221	Dec 23, 2009 by Jerry F
	An update........... (Preview) Hi MIP family! Have missed you all tremendously! Sitting up is not the most comfortable right now so I will keep this brief and touch back later. The surgery experience from start to finish was a nightmare-which included waking up on the OR table, being dressed in someone else's underclothing, and c...	shellyj123	4	762	Dec 23, 2009 by Jerry F
	Feel like this is home...(here) (Preview) Haven't posted in so long. My AH has been for the most part in controlled drinking stage...the last year he has slipped more and more. I made the decision to move out of our home. When I told him in the begining of Nov. that I would be moving out come Feb or March ...he told me to GET OUT by the 1st of the year...	marmare	2	782	Dec 23, 2009 by Jerry F
	Still Amazed - 20 years later... (Preview) Still Amazed and Excited! 20 years laterReply Quote More Edit PostDelete PostBan IPReport Spam To celebrate an alcoholic that doesn't drink is like applauding a cowboy with hemroids for not riding his horse. When the darn things hurt enough and he has tried every way possible to ride without...	John	10	971	Dec 23, 2009 by drucilla06
	My Story (Preview) I have had several people request that I post my story so here goes: I myself did not grow up with alcoholic parents, but did have a very dysfunctional family in the way that we communicated with each other. There was much triangulation between my mom, my dad and me. My dad (probably a sober alcoholic) di...	Overcome	3	902	Dec 23, 2009 by hotrod
	Taking the 1st Step (Preview) This is my first time reaching out for help. After reading some of the posts I have to admit I am a litle intimidated. It's weird because on one hand I would have liked to think that I would never be in this position, but on the other hand I think I always knew I would. I am married to an unadmitted A and it is rea...	Augustine	3	1340	Dec 22, 2009 by abbyal
	Need an op to chair tonight 9pm meeting (Preview) I am having xmas eve tonight with my kids. As they will be with my ex this year for xmas. I will not be home in time to chair. if an op can please fill in.. thank you Kerry	kerry5	0	405	Dec 22, 2009 by kerry5
	Did what I had to...why does it hurt so much (Preview) My 40 yo A/DA son entered himself into detox and then rehab. I was quite proud of him for taking those steps and still am. He had been living with us for around 9 months with stipulations that we would support him in what he must do. Those stipulations were... Stay clean and sober Go to meetings regular...	Mobirdie	7	1505	Dec 22, 2009 by Mobirdie
	update on friend (Preview) Lauras family have been told it could take weeks before they can release her body. Her hubby (sober A) hasnt yet found a way to tell the boys, reason being he admits to being a coward(his own words) and her death being on the 16th and oldest sons 11th birthday on the 20th and next is christmas ..bless him, g...	belle1	3	398	Dec 22, 2009 by shadow1
	Shellyj123 Update.... (Preview) Surgery went well as well as it could, She is home however, She is still in Alot of pain, So any and All that could spare some more Prayers Please keep them coming... She is down & out and needs a MIP Uplift if you all could help out :o) If you could spare a message of love... Anything to help her get out o...	Jozie	8	929	Dec 22, 2009 by Priscilla83
	Finally the end (Preview) Went and saw AH at the prison sunday. When the visit was over, I got this rush of emotion. Started to cry as he hugged me goodbye. He said everything will be ok. He probably thought I was crying for him. I was crying because we will never be ok again, there is no we at all. That night I had dreams of someone tel...	Debilyn	17	988	Dec 21, 2009 by artygirl
	Step 10 - AHA moment! (Preview) I was in an open AA meeting this morning - it's a step 10, 11, and 12 meeting, and it's my favorite one all week. :) This morning we were talking about Step 10. "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it." This has been on my mind a lot the last few days,...	White Rabbit	1	831	Dec 21, 2009 by artie
	New here (Preview) Hello, I am new here. My husband of 16 years is an alcoholic. I am at my wits end in trying to help him. I don't know what to do, but I know I will not leave. The drinking is progressively getting worse. He blames all of our problems on everyone but himself. The frustrating part is that I am graduate schoo...	3dogs	5	803	Dec 21, 2009 by abbyal
	Surgery tomorrow at 7:30am-please send up some prayers MIP family! (Preview) Just got the call to tell me that surgery is tomorrow at 730am.....I am the first of the day-YEAH! Funny last night I started praying, asking my HP to please get me in there as early as I could, and I'd love to be first......that way it's not so long that I have to go without a drink (which is the HARDEST thin...	shellyj123	10	806	Dec 21, 2009 by Andrea12
	Update on me (Preview) The last couple of weeks have been a time of a lot of transformation for me. Well, basically since my ex boyfriend and I split up. I have had a lot of chaos at home related to the oldest and middle children and have been dealing with a lot of stress related to that. Also, going to school every other weeken...	carolinagirl	3	628	Dec 21, 2009 by carolinagirl
	I'm getting out and want the world to know (Preview) I had posted in the past that due to some medical problems I can not drive right now. I live in a rural area and that makes it tough. Today though I get to get out. I am going to lunch with family and then hopefully stop by a good friends house. I am so excited since Thanksgiving the only place I have been is...	fishinmama	6	886	Dec 20, 2009 by maire rua
	love you,best friend, get away talk (Preview) I have been reading a few post there was a comment about treating others better than yourself. This really hit home I'm guilty, I don't drink or drug I just don't have any desire. My wife on the otherhand who has been clean and sober for almost five years lives everyday to stay that way. When she first cam...	noclue	3	961	Dec 20, 2009 by Jerry F
	Need prayers for daughter to deal with losing part of support system for A dad. (Preview) My daughter is sobbing, grieving terribly for her cat. This cat was 20 years old and has been her comfort during the A's binges and rages. This cat has dried her tears with his fur, "kissed" (licked) her tears away and stood still while she sobbed into his fur, burying her face, hiding from...	MaryPoppins	10	952	Dec 20, 2009 by MaryPoppins
	An old lesson revisited (Preview) Aloha MIPers/Al-Anon Family Groupers...The consequence of practice is new found or in this case old found knowledge and awareness which is so supportive to ones recovery from the disease and its effects. I remember in early program reading from inside the ODAAT daily reader the wisdom of Dr. Har...	Jerry F	1	775	Dec 20, 2009 by fishinmama
	Newbie needing advice (Preview) Hi, I am new here and looking for advise. I have been married 20 years, the problem began 6 years ago. My AH has had help and is in AA. A year ago I thought he reached his rock bottom, and has been sober until about 8weeks ago, when he fell of the wagon for the weekend. I thought when you hit rock bottom you were d...	Ginger	4	938	Dec 20, 2009 by Tattyhead
	newbie (Preview) Hi everyone im new to this forum have read it a few times thought id post i left my husband finally after 8 years of crap finding it very very difficult not to think about him wonder if hes drinking etc god only knows why but im angry i guess that ive left and hes still drinking what does it take him to stop he by...	scotslass	8	1230	Dec 20, 2009 by kitty
	an introduction and request for support (Preview) before i de my request i want to fill you in ,y mum has been sober for 15 years but was drunk for 15 yrs before that- when she was drunk, shed go off on abusive ravings and ramblings for hours- it would start from the time she picked us up frm school to the time she crashed out late- we were withdrawn kids and sc...	rosielee	4	758	Dec 20, 2009 by Overcome
	My Story WARNING: LONG POST! LOL (Preview) I feel the need to tell my story, and I'm a writer so this is the easiest way for me to tell it. I'm not so much looking for advice as I am just needing to get this out. Maybe it's my way of telling my HP. If reading this gives you any insight you'd like to share, please do. And thanks in advance if you read the whol...	intothewoods	9	929	Dec 19, 2009 by Debilyn
	RIP Friend (Preview) My Friend Laura(35) Passed Away This Morning Fom Alchol And Pain Killers Abuse Leaving 2 Small Boys With CP 10&6 Yrs Old And Her Long Term Partner Her Organs Failed And Took Swelling On The Brain Which Gave Her Brain Damage Her Family Were Advised To Switch Off Her Life Support. *Death leaves a hear...*	belle1	12	891	Dec 19, 2009 by wp
	finally able to RIP..... (Preview) hello.... i've shared serveral times on this site and recieved great words of widom and encouragment and I am more grateful than you could ever know.. this message is to say that my Abf passed away early sunday morning after a struggle with alcohol. He was 31 years old and the absolute love of my life. Ev...	layneee	14	800	Dec 19, 2009 by Tattyhead
	Holiday Amazement - MIP Residents (Preview) Hello Fellow members! The outpouring of cards being sent to the MIP recovery homes, for the residents in them is absolutely amazing! The guys are so touched by what you have done. Every time I walk into one of the homes, someone pulls me aside to share one of the cards they have recieved. These are not...	John	1	805	Dec 19, 2009 by Jen
	Do you ever think Alanon is just a way to cope with an unhappy marriage? (Preview) I feel like Alanon is a good tool in recognizing some enabling behaviours and helping us to deal better in our relationships with an A, no matter if that relationship is a child, friend, parent, sibling, spouse, what have you. In my particular case, my A is a spouse, from whom I am separated. At this poi...	Rora	12	1054	Dec 19, 2009 by Dyinginside
	Reality (Preview) I know one reason I stayed with the ex A was that all his chaos, confusion, demands meant I could not focus on myself at all. In fact I really feel he felt that if I had a moment to myself it was somehow stolen from him. He complained when I was grieving about my mother's sudden death that I was not paying att...	maresie	3	849	Dec 19, 2009 by Andrea12
	Who is it safe to be ME around? (Preview) I had a minor blowup with my mother this morning. She called to ask me about my A brothers check that our dad always sends for Christmas. I did not realise she was also going to invite me to a resentment. She is codependent, of course, and is very good at sending me these covert invitations to resentments....	Jen	4	1237	Dec 19, 2009 by blender_girl
	Challenges are my HP's way to help me grow spiritually.... (Preview) The last thing I wanted to do Friday night was go to my F2F meeting. I haven't been feeling the best physically, mentally or spiritually and the depression is soooo huge and overwelming right now, and didn't really want to rain on anyone else's holidays and good times. As I layed there in bed half asle...	shellyj123	3	1363	Dec 19, 2009 by kitty
	Christmas , and forgiveness (Preview) T o start off I would like to wish everybody an early Merry Christmas , and a Happy New Year , I am going to pray for forgiveness to my hp ( god ) ! And pray for forgiveness for my X wife and her family and wish them a merry christmas and a happy new year also ! Mabe I'll luck out and my X wife will send me a christmas...	john boy	5	977	Dec 18, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Depressed (Preview) I'm sorry - just need a bit of a (subdued) vent I now feel my AH is at the point of no return. He spends most of the time in bed, doesn't eat and only moves to drag himself to local shop for more fags and brandy. His only hope, I feel, would be a long spell in residential treatment which neither I nor the (UK) Na...	Tattyhead	6	756	Dec 18, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Cut down on drinking. (Preview) Surprisingly my husband cut down on his drinking to weekends only. I was already thinking he doesn't have a drinking problem, but today his behavior was very agitated like it hurt his brain to cope even though he wasn't drinking. I spent all evening looking for some papers for him, and you would thi...	dori711	8	819	Dec 18, 2009 by MrsGratitude
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.