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Really struggling today
(Preview)
Hi, just thought I'd come and share, just looking for some connection I think. My addict boyfriend is in the middle of a very long string of constant relapses (maybe 1-2 days sober in between each), and I'm starting to feel very lonely. There are pockets of honesty in between the relapses, where I feel l...
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Sangyaa
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6
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797
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Child Support
(Preview)
Well, the ups and downs of his moods, I don't know his true feelings at all and I blame it on the "disease". I'm supportive of his healing......but I also have to be supportive of myself and my children. Last night after seven months, he finally admitted to me he was using drugs again. So I was r...
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RoseODAT
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2
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711
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Heading out for the Family program...
(Preview)
My boyfriend (qualifier--we have known each other for a year and dating for 6 months) has been in rehab for the last 6 weeks and tomorrow his parents and I are flying to go to the family program. I have spent the last couple weeks reading here, reading Alanon literature, attending meetings and really w...
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Maize
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6
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700
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Court tomorrow
(Preview)
A year and half since I filed for child support/custody and many reschedules (court rescheduled) court is finally tomorrow afternoon. :) I don't really know what to expect. The past dates said child support and visitation this one just says child support. I called my lawyer she said she wasn't sure a...
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Melissa21
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4
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789
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feelings
(Preview)
I am feeling guilty for wasting so much time trying to fix and control my husband's behavior. I am feeling the devastation of this separation from him. We moved nine months ago. I am feeling sad because I have always chosen men that were bad for me. I feel mortified at the thought of any of my three daught...
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kath
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9
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765
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Change
(Preview)
((((Family))), Well the time has finally come. Tomorrow I start a new position at work. After 11 years with the company and 9 in this department, I decided to leave it. Thanks to this program I found the courage to do it. Now as a Taurus I HATE change. I like my own comfy world, in a certain order on a cer...
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Karilynn
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8
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827
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Thank you, thank you...
(Preview)
For the encouragement I receive on this board. If I couldn't come here to read and post I would be so much worse off. Bless you all. Dreams
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DreamsOver
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3
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741
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We are talking again...
(Preview)
Hi I have been writing many times before here about how I entered Al-Anon, first while still dating a girl in England that is an alcoholic in recovery. She broke up with me just over three months ago and since then we have had little contact. While she was doing the steps she was advised by the sponsor she...
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Cosmos
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8
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925
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What do you do with your anger?
(Preview)
I'm looking for guidance here. I was told by someone to just feel a feelign...try not to react right away. OK got that...so what happens when if you feel the feeling it gets bigger until you realize WHAT the feeling is (in my case i am REALLY angry) over things that happened YEARS ago that i had completel...
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rainbojo66
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14
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741
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Choosing my focus
(Preview)
I haven't posted in a long while. I've been REALLY busy. I'll attempt to recap the last few mo. I decided to leave my home of 18 yrs. and move to the Gulf coast. For years I have dreamed of living near the ocean. I decided to just "do it"! I rented a wonderful apartment on a pond, 2 miles from t...
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Christy
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12
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874
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New Here and Mad as hell..
(Preview)
Hi out there I just realy need to shout a bit today, Im sure most of you understand that. I come from a family of violent alcoholics and my sibs 3 became alcoholics. I swore I would never fall into the trap of booze, yet here I am at 34 newly divorced and engaged to a man who drinks..Gets better, I moved 8000 m...
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Leila1
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17
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1010
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Thought I'd found the love of my life.........
(Preview)
Hello my name is Liz, I am not an alcoholic but the man I love and adore is....here's my story.. I first met him some 20 years ago, I would've only been about 20...he was quiet and reserved and I liked him straight away...he worked at my local petrol station, so I saw him pretty much everyday, as my bus stop w...
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Lizz
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8
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759
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Wish I Had A Life Coach....
(Preview)
Since my son has been removed from our deceased mother's home for many reason's, not the least of which was using it for drug use for himself and his friends. He is thirty years old and since finishing high school it has been one long slide downward into someone I don't even know any longer. Last night ju...
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DreamsOver
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8
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970
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Todays gift
(Preview)
I just loved this: Pity is the deadliest feeling that can be offered to a woman. --Vicki Baum We must move forward with confidence, trusting that the strength we need will be given us, having faith in our visions to guide us. Problems need not daunt us. Rather, they can spur us on to more creative activi...
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Maize
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2
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575
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Son - 17
(Preview)
Hi. I'm back. I posted on here once before about a month ago. My son had come home so drunk I almost took him to the hospital, but didn't. Rather I watched him for hours to make sure he'd be ok in the morning. He started work, a good hard working job, with his cousin who is trying to start his own concrete bu...
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Christie92
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8
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540
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Ugg...he's healthy and sober but now I'm the problem
(Preview)
This is my first post here and I'm so grateful to have found you all. I spent the weekend having a pity party for myself but once I realized that there is someplace to go and others who have been where I am I felt empowered and inspired. So for that I'd like to say thank you to everyone for sharing themsel...
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Danielle07
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5
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891
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Change
(Preview)
I was reading in the Courage to Change book this evening and it was very interesting today. It talks of change and not having to rush it. Just identifying that you want to change is one of the steps. I feel so much better after reading that. I am working so hard at trying to change old habits that have been wi...
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Sweet Stanley
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3
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606
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Blessed Monday to you all...
(Preview)
I heard something the other day that I wanted to share with everyone. It said " forgiveness is a tribute to the strong ". I love that statement. Hope everyone has a wonderful day!
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kablisnow
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3
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482
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Alanon meeting puzzle
(Preview)
I went to Alanon face to face meeting once a week in the last five weeks, I don't know how people can go to meetings so many times because I just could not do it, at least, at the moment. Every time when I go to Alanon meetings, if I am not sad before the meeting, then I will be most likely sad after the meeting as...
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Adabnu
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10
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1113
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Losing it all...
(Preview)
Last year I attended several f2f meetings (kicking and screaming) with a friend. After every meeting, I was annoyed that my friend had wasted my time and I was very angry that my day had been stolen from me. I couldn't understand why people would sit around in their own negativity and keep stirring up th...
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nh girl
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11
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1215
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Looking for Insight... ESH... All of it...
(Preview)
Today for some reason the Word "Cluttered" will not leave my thoughts... it started when I look around my house this morning, and just feel Drug down from all the things I SHOULD be doing, instead of sitting around dwelling on it not Being done... But as I started to dig into this thinking I re...
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Jozie
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6
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779
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what's up w/ my snail mail?
(Preview)
I AM SO FRUSTRATED WITH MY SNAIL MAIL! ON SAT. MY SIS CALLS MY MOM & SAYS THAT HER SON'S B-DAY CARD WAS NOT IN THE MAIL & THE CHECK WASN'T EITHER: SHE RECEIVED AN ENVELOPE WITH NOTHING IN IT. I AM SURE THAT I SEALED THE ENVELOPE BUT I GUESS THE STUPID THING DIDN'T SEAL RIGHT! ANYHOW, I AM OK TODAY BUT...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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517
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Hate everything
(Preview)
Dear all, Recently, I start to feel so resentful to everything. My friends no longer care about me anymore, it seemed to them that the break up is months ago, I should be fine and move on right now. I don't enjoy working, don't like seeing strangers as I am doing right now (I am doing a lot of social network...
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Adabnu
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9
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480
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poor me
(Preview)
I overheard one of my roommates having a conversation with his daughter on the phone (as he has no boundaries he broadcast it everywhere). Somehow in a enquiry about her going back to school he made the conversation about that he was alone and had no one! Of course he has a girlfriend (who is superglue...
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maresie
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8
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923
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My story
(Preview)
Well ... I guess the time has come. I went to an open AA meeting on Friday (8/6). It is a speaker meeting, and generally there is an Alanon speaker that speaks the first half and an AA speaker that speaks the second half. The chair of the meeting asked if I would speak this coming Friday (8/13). The last...
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White Rabbit
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6
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923
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WOW... Slap in the face...
(Preview)
Ok... So Most Know that I lost My Afather to this Disease, going on 2 Years this coming Nov. Well I have been on an up and down roller coaster of emotions, and at times I catch myself "Blocking" those thoughts, because of "My resentments in our Relationship, My regrets of our time toget...
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Jozie
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7
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1238
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business meeting?
(Preview)
What's up with the business meeting for Aug 8? I thought I heard someone say the July meeting was postponed to tonight. ?? wp
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wp
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2
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346
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MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MEETING
(Preview)
I am unable to chair the Monday Al-Anon meeting. Hoping someone might be able to step up for me. Thanks. Shimo
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shimo
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1
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399
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Whats a Mother to do
(Preview)
My 29 year old son has been sober for a couple of weeks and looking for a job. He rents our garage apartment that belongs to my husband, his step-dad. Rent was due on the first and he does not have it but my ex needed some help today cutting up a downed tree which gave him the opportunity to work off some of th...
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Greenvalleygal
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3
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769
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Want to be the real me--soon !
(Preview)
I started step work then chickened out as I got closer to to making the list of "wrongs" and then having the share them. there just seeem to be to many - in my life growing up tasting the peanut butter with your finger was punishable by a full day of "time out" back before time out was i...
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glad
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9
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805
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God Protects and guides
(Preview)
I typing what was supposed to be a short note to my A on my computer - unsure if i shoud be putting that in writting or not upexpectedly the power went out and I "lost" all I had entered into the computer-- I smiled and thanked God for his patience with me> I have been praying to him for years...
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glad
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2
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560
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FYI Children & Addiction
(Preview)
I received an email from Hazelden for families with children who are addicted. I thought I would pass it along to those who need it. Another resource for this terrible disease: www.FamiliesFacingAddiction.org
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Karilynn
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2
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930
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just need to vent...
(Preview)
I am raising my children, 8,9, and 18 mos by myself because I choose not to live with my AH. He is out playing golf, getting high and living the single life. I am going back to school in a few weeks to finish my degree, which will be no easy task while he gets to sit around and party and have fun. Why in the h*** di...
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kath
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4
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622
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Having a Hard Time Today
(Preview)
Now I know I was doing pretty good with not asking my mother to see if she could help my daughter out in her time of need since she is behind on the rent and I also didn`t cave fall the loan business. But last week she was out with friend and don`t you know she twists her ankle and shes on crutches this week and ca...
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Samsgram
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3
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825
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All new to me -- would love guidance from those who have been there, done that
(Preview)
I'm sure you've all heard this a million times before, but I never -- repeat, NEVER -- thought I'd be in this situation. I come from a background where excess drinking (and recreational drug use) is shameful and abhorrent. I don't drink at all, and have never even smoked a joint. Yet here I am, a suc...
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Sara Tamar
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10
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852
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Business Meeting Scheduled for August 15th 9pm
(Preview)
This months business meeting is scheduled for Sunday August 15th 2010 at 9pm est. Attendance to the business meeting in July was low and it had to be canceled. It is important that we all make an effort to attend these meetings. Where issues are addressed and voted on as a group conscience. This roo...
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kerry5
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0
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295
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the steps
(Preview)
I realize how absolutely obsessed I have become regarding my husband's addiction. I think about him all the time. I am angry with him all the time. Step One says that we are powerless over them and our lives had become unmanageable. That is what is happening to me. I suffer from guilt because I spend way t...
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kath
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7
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839
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Another newcomer...
(Preview)
came into the room this Super Saturday AFG meeting morning. What else could I feel and then do what I felt and was done for me when I first got here. While the rest of the group seemed for the moment to forget what it was like I certainly didn't and I heard, felt, and reexperienced her pain. Who cared wha...
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Jerry F
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3
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715
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Update
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I haven't been on here for quite some time. The last time I posted, my husband was in detox. He had a pretty good almost-year, but in May he slipped and broke a boundary that I had set (that there will be no more drug use in the house). So I asked him to leave and we're now separated. I'm now act...
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sterling7
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4
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614
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Home...and so grateful
(Preview)
I made it out, It was a GOOD experience. I know over time it will only benefit me. Through her daughter...only emerging but having lived with her for 13 years...i see the behaviours which have already taken root...so much people pleasing. So sad. I see myself...and I know will be better able to ident...
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rainbojo66
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3
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667
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So lost it hurts, So confused I am mad, So scared, but will not run.
(closed)
(Preview)
As to the lost part, I have been married now for 13 years to my best friend, the one I confide in, The one I love more than my own life. I have given everything I have to my marriage, I have been completly faithful physicly and mentally. Thats is where the so lost it hurts comes in. When I married her I knew...
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brokenbeatscareddiehard
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14
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1242
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Piper Pictures
(Preview)
(((Family))), Thought you might enjoy seeing some pictures of Piper Samantha Midnight B-J I! This is my life. This is why I keep coming back to Alanon. I'm such a codependent to this cat! Have a wonderful weekend. Much love & blessings to all! Live strong, Karilynn & Piper the Pouncing P...
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Karilynn
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4
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1152
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Forgiving myself........
(Preview)
It was told to me that I won't be happy until I give myself permission to be happy. Right now I'm busy case building against myself and subsequently why I shouldn't be happy. I've thought about forgiving myself.....how do you do that.....well I had a thought: I have a beautiful, wonderful daughter (a...
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mjhyankees
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5
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658
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Anyone have experience with Campral drug?
(Preview)
Well, I had to go to our family doctor today, and when he asked how my wife was doing (metastatic cancer), I spontaneously decided it was time to let him know about her "other" disease. She came to me this AM after a two-day drunk and expressed that she really wanted to stop doing this to hersel...
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xd
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5
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1697
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I don't want to PLAY anymore.
(Preview)
Hi everyone, my name is josee and I am a first day grateful member of this group. I have received so much help already...but wow do i ahve far to go. I am visiting my AH sister for the first time in 8 years. Long story short...she is 12 years older than I, (I am the last of 7 and adopted) and she and my other sis...
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rainbojo66
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7
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875
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Went to an open AA meeting- WOW!
(Preview)
Well, in my (unsuccessful thus far) quest to find a local group that is a good fit for me, I tried another one listed on the area roster this evening. When I got there, I was informed that the AlAnon group that met there stopped about a year ago, but I was welcome to join this (small) open AA meeting. I hesita...
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xd
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8
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1418
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I am hopeless
(Preview)
Not even sure I should bring this up A man is interested in me. He is of the same religious beliefs. He had me do that messenger thing. He is polite and sent pics. Is VERY good looking, has HUGE beautiful house, probably what every woman would want. Here I am scared to death, feeling I just cannot relate to a...
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lyndebi
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11
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985
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Inner peace
(Preview)
Hi MIP Family,
I wanted to share my gratitude for a feeling of inner peace that has grown from the tiniest seed that was planted when I first found alanon. As I look back, I can see there were times the seed of inner peace just sat within me, not sprouting, but still possible as I learned how to put one foot...
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Rocky38
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8
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743
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I Can`t Access Meetings
(Preview)
Not sure why. I sent a note a week ago to whomever was listed on the site but never heard back. Anyone have any idea why or what I can do?
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Samsgram
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5
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690
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support for those who cannot leave
(Preview)
Some people cannot leave. I do not mean they are unable to do so. I mean, literally, that they have no options and cannot leave the situation. Please do not argue away this assertion because I know from my own life that there are gaps in our societal safety nets. Circumstantially I am currently unable to...
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Garden of Mirrors
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15
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1117
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Maybe this is a start................................
(Preview)
Still not buying the higher power stuff in the sense that I felt abandoned by him (her, it, whatever) a while ago. I do remember a meeting or a reading passage where someone said that they got that step in pieces....they came......(at first that was all), then they "came to" (as in woke up et...
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mjhyankees
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4
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607
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the way to keep it
(Preview)
I've learned that for me to keep what I want, to keep the understanding I gain in recovery, I must be constarntly consciously practising it. If I want love, understanding, forgiveness, loving detachment, faith ~ al of these things are things I must be actively practising to keep. I cant just do it on...
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kitty
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8
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649
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FINALLY!!!!!!!
(Preview)
got back to my f2f meeting last night. It is like everything else...once you stop doing something it is hard to get back to it. I was fighting with myself. I didn't want to go. I wanted an easier, softer way. I wanted to go to bed , sleep and forget about life for awhile. I know I said about 3 times that I wasn'...
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Gailey
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2
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592
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Mood is gradually getting better....
(Preview)
I'm amazed how low I can feel sometimes. Because I really think long and hard about things, I often come up with negative arguments (against myself, my life etc.) that they are hard to contradict, therefore making me depressed. But I find that with some reminders from here, I can also think of equally...
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mjhyankees
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2
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384
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I'm down that my work on myself is too little to late...
(Preview)
Not trying to be dramatic here....I was in therapy in my 30's and worked through a lot of stuff, and was so grateful that I had feeling I've got the the rest of my life to apply what I'd learned and be happier. Well here I am at 50, back in therapy, feeling back at square 1, and feeling like it's too late to make...
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mjhyankees
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13
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743
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Feeling the Fear...
(Preview)
As Most know I have been fighting some off the wall addictions that I have noticed here of late, Another would be my Addiction to "Needing" others With Me... Sounds Crazy I know, but for me, about the only time I am TRULY alone, is when I go to the Market, or to the Local department store, & s...
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Jozie
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4
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1122
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Confused
(Preview)
My AH B was sober for 10 yrs before I met him. He started drinking heavily shortly after we met. I was very new at this and just wanted to run away as I felt like I did not have enough vested. We became more serious in betwen bouts of drinking and he got a DUI and stopped while on probation so he spent 30 days in ja...
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DareToDream
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11
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774
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husband wont stop smoking pot
(Preview)
I married a man that I knew had a history of drug use (pot). Before we were married I asked him if he did that anymore and he said no. NaievlyI thought he was like me, was a partier in the early days, but settled down after having kids. Not true. I realized after my daughters and I moved in with him that he is a ch...
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kath
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8
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3171
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Light Bulb Moment
(Preview)
Well, this is clear as mud I think . . . but here goes. Ok, this is going to seem small and strange, but it was big for me. I am talking to my daughter, she is telling me things about her friends and going to the fair etc. She is chatting away, I am interested and comment in return. Then her story is over. I con...
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tlcate
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4
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429
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focus
(Preview)
This one might be long, but I'm mainly venting for myself........ I have begun to accept (for the past couple of days) that I am not a multi-tasker. I have strong ADD and have not been on my meds for quite some time (caused conflict with my mom in law trying to control that) as I do not have health insuran...
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RoseODAT
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2
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404
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