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here we go again
(Preview)
Hi all I am in a weird state of limbo w AH at the moment; basically I have made it clear that I give up...after 20 yrs of marriage, each one charged w the struggle of me hoping praying etc that things would change and he in the pattern of the disease, I have told him that I think we could achieve a healthier rela...
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yanksfan51
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4
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390
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New here. Nice to meet you all.
(Preview)
My name is Kelleigh. I am unsure of what to say in these 'first timers' posts, so I figured it'd be easiest to link you to my video telling you my story. It's very brief, so if you wouldn't mind -- please view it. Look forward to chatting with you all. Goodnight. [video=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...
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movingstillx
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6
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310
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Did I do the right thing? Hurt, lost and confused.
(Preview)
On Feb first I am moving into a new house. I wa supposed to be moving with my alcoholic boyfriend (now ex). We were so excited and loved each other so much, then alcohol ruined it all. We dated the first time around about a year ago when he had 3 months sober or so. He.made it to about 6 before he started drinki...
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Stiff5436
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7
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539
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Silent treatment
(Preview)
I've been getting the silent treatment from AH for almost a week now. He got upset because I didn't want to be woken up at 3:00 in the morning. Is it wrong that I'm finding it quite peaceful? I'm going about my days and taking care of me. I am not going to be the one to apologize for wanting to sleep as I hav...
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TLD
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5
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592
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Holding Husband responsible
(Preview)
Well when my incident first started the lies started unraveling one by one. My AH would not speak to me at all or face me even for visitation of the kids. Then when he did have communication with me it was to further hurt me. So I filed for divorce to protect my kids. He tried to kill himself in front of my d...
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ttpurtee
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6
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348
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Tools Needed
(Preview)
Warning: unfiltered rant ahead: I feel like a failure. My AH succeeded in sucking me into not one, but TWO big fights in the last 24 hours. I let him. I know better, but he knows me so well He knows how to suck me in. To my credit, I have been avioding this explosion all week. There are things that need...
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LostToday
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5
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480
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New to MIP and returning to Al-Anon again
(Preview)
Hello everyone at MIP, I am new to this site and would love to get any help and support that you can offer. I recently moved out from my home where I resided with my AH and our son. I feel like my world has spiraled more out of control after his addiction seemed to become more active (coincidentaly after th...
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Hopeful926
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4
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260
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Great Song to Remind Me of My HP
(Preview)
I Won't Let Go (Song and lyrics by Rascal Flatts) It's like a storm That cuts a path It breaks your will It feels like that You think you're lost But you're not lost On your own You're not alone I will stand by you I will help you through When youve done all you can do And you cant cope I will dry your eyes I will f...
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Green Eyes
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2
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2475
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Trust
(Preview)
I know I have to trust in my HP and I know that in my heart, I really do. Unfortunately, because I've been lied to so many times recently I really have trouble believing anything my AH has to say. I feel like I just don't trust him in any matter, at all, not just relating to his drinking and hiding it. This i...
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ilovedogs
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7
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565
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Communicating via Email
(Preview)
My AH and I have a hard time communicating. Sometimes it's because he's not sober. Sometimes it's because I'm mad. Either way; our relationship is not great right now. It's hard for us to have serious conversations without it becoming a fight. I've found that we do communicate well over e mail. I...
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MidwesternMom
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5
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609
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Need some guidance
(Preview)
My boyfriend is an alcoholic, he's recognized this for years, but has a huge problem with staying sober. He's relapsed a few times since we've been together, he always bounces back and.gets sober within a day or two. He had been sober this last time for a year until a week ago and this is the worst I've see...
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CassieKellz
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6
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309
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Brand new to the Al-anon family
(Preview)
So glad I have the opportunity to share with people who understand!
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CassieKellz
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3
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242
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Hey guys!
(Preview)
I am sorry I have been absent for a while. I kind of closed myself off for the past 2 months. I am back at the hospital working. I thought I was better after my alanon retreat in the mountains and maybe I was. I did let go of a lot of anger and resentments while I was there. I went to my first alanon meeting withou...
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MDK
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5
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470
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Need some guidance
(Preview)
My boyfriend is an alcoholic, he's recognized this for years, but has a huge problem with staying sober. He's relapsed a few times since we've been together, he always bounces back and.gets sober within a day or two. He had been sober this last time for a year until a week ago and this is the worst I've see...
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CassieKellz
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2
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237
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Sometimes Barely Gettin By....
(Preview)
Hi All... Sorry I haven't been "Present" ON the Board Lately, but I have had a Pretty Crappy Go of things these Last 2-3 weeks... And Tho I am Doing my Best to Patient for HP's Will, I know at times I Slip and Need to Dust off & Start again... Cant Say I like it Much at All Really, but I'm Still Mo...
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Jozie
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3
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359
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Obssession
(Preview)
So I'm trying so hard to turn off the obssession wheel that spins in my mind .. I am tired of being tired but as from my shares, I'm getting so much .. It's so funny that when I show up at meetings I really don't have to do anything but listen .. Recovery just comes and yet I feel the work of working through the em...
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MeTwo2
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3
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399
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If you're not happy, it's on you...
(Preview)
I've been going to Al Anon meetings for just over a year now. And this is really one of the most important things I've learned--if you are not happy with your life right now, in spite of all of the horrible things that may be happening, it is your problem and no one else's. It's that simple. Now, that being...
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usedtobeanyer
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6
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460
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Sharing
(Preview)
i don't exactly remember my last share but i've been sharing in face to face meetings on feelings and recognising the inner child in me who stopped growing when she was obssessing on the alcoholics which you know woulda been like about 5 ? I love this program .. I've recognised so much through the awaren...
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MeTwo2
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3
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376
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My Part!!!!!
(Preview)
Hi, I just wanted to share that I'm starting to see my part in the relationships I have. It is not easy seeing that I have caused as much pain and suffering , as they have done to myself. It is not good. This may be time to start my inventory work. Oh my goodness, what a start. Tracey
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Tracey C
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4
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540
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Been a long time...
(Preview)
It was about five years ago that I first visited this board and it was a lifesaver for me. I found that in devoting all my time and energy to my then husband/addict I had no one else to talk to. This board gave me a place to come and share and learn that I wasn't alone, that everyone's story was almost the sam...
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carolinagirl
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5
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509
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Husbands demands
(Preview)
My husband and I are supposed to be separated. I got my own apartment in July but he has nowhere to stay so has been at my place the last week. Here I am at work. While he is home alone in my place (which makes me uncomfortable due to his past of stealing my things to sell). I am already mad because I go to work eve...
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respect
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9
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659
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Is this ME???
(Preview)
So I usually do the online meetings here most mornings... My Abf knows I do them... Yesterday morning we got woke up by a 7am phone call from his "friend" wanting to go out for "breakfast".... I knew what it was really about, whatever, nothing I can do.. So he went and I jumped on my m...
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kris10
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10
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580
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Missing my past tonight .. But then ..
(Preview)
I had a recognition this week that I can read from the courage to change books, how alanon works, hope for today, one day at a time, 12 steps 12 traditions, etc.. over and over and always and still i hear something new .. it never siezes to amaze me .. the spiritual piece of this program .. well this week I had...
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MeTwo2
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2
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285
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I hiked a mountain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Preview)
This past weekend I went to an Alanon retreat or round up. My first ever!!!! I was chosen to be a speaker and share my story. OMG!!! I started freaking!!! Not only was it my first round up it was my first time sharing my story!!!! I had RLC's books with me so I read and prayed. I felt him in the room with me when I...
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MDK
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10
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293
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"I'm dying..." or not
(Preview)
I'm not here as much as I like, and only seem to be able to check in once a week or so. So many new members since I joined a few years back, and the reason I came isn't devasting my life anymore. I have come to acceptance about my ex. I never thought I'd be able to say that. My brother is an addict.. pot/pres...
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Loupiness
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4
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423
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Conflicting Feelings
(Preview)
Surfingirl's post about mourning the life you wanted got me thinking. I've been in a low grade depression over the past few days. Ive been separated from my AH for 6 months. Last summer he was on a steep decline, culminating in a binge that drove him insane. And, after many warnings for absenteeism (a r...
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nyc018
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9
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605
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New to Al-Anon
(Preview)
I was married to an alcoholic for 40 years. He died two years ago and I thought that my problems with alcohol were over. I started a relationship with a recovering alcoholic just two months after I became a widow. I did not realize that just because he was not drinking that he was still an alcoholic. I co...
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whitedove
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10
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308
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Back Sliding
(Preview)
I've become complacent recently working my program, I know I need to get back to working it dilligently. An exchange with my spouse today made me realize that I'm not as far along as I thought. Things have been going well, we're communicating nicely, we have a loving relationship. But I think I've be...
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Kestrel57
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5
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379
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His trial is tomorrow, trying to keep strong
(Preview)
So for most of you guys that replied to my previous post. It has been about a week and a half since I cut it off with my DA boyfriend. He has tried to get in touch with me but I ignore his 3rd party messangers. I have been happy because he has been out of sight and out of mind. I have kept telling myself there is b...
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Julie3310
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7
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471
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New here...
(Preview)
Hello,
I don't really know how to start this. I'm not even sure if I should be here. But in my heart, I know there is a problem. My husband and I have been married for almost three years. When we first got together and after we got married, we would both drink, mostly socially and for fun. I obviously stoppe...
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thetmdp
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6
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330
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The more I let go, the more I receive.
(Preview)
I feel filled with creativity. I have come alive. Too many coincidences have pushed me in this direction that can only be described as God showing me its okay to start... living. I am actually living. I am feeling so much. I have been watching alot of youtube videos of this band I really like and their mu...
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Michelle814
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2
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502
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sponsorship
(Preview)
I asked someone to be my sponsor last Sunday at my meeting. I called her on Monday at 8:00 p.m. as previously arranged, and no one answered, and so I left a message that I was hoping we could talk. She hasn't called back, and her daughter's voice was on the voice mail prompt. Her daughter said she'd ge...
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tschanmm
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9
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341
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New Board Moderator
(Preview)
Hi all.... we were all rocked a couple of months ago with the sudden passing of our friend Rodney (RLC), and continue to miss him so much. Betty and I wanted to add another moderator to the mix early in the New Year, and the time now seems right.... Really pleased to announce that we have a new Board Modera...
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canadianguy
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13
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492
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Procrastination
(Preview)
This is probably one of my biggest character defects that I am staring in the face at the moment. Literally in my top 3 of keeps me from living life. Thankfully today is a good day for me on that level I did a lot of things to get misc stuff dealt with. It's not a minor issue as in let's put this off for a day th...
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Pushka
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15
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1533
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What do you do for FUN?
(Preview)
I thought I'd ask everyone what they do for FUN? (Remember that?!) Early in my recovery, my sponsor told me to stop my obsessive thinking... stop doing that squirrel cage thing-y, round and round in my head.... and do something "fun" instead. At the time, I was so clueless, growing up an...
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glad lee
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15
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913
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Why do I want so much?
(Preview)
I woke up today. So that's a start. I can't express my feelings of longing and desire. I can't express them because sometimes I don't think they matter. Is it normal for the alcoholic to shut down. To be unable to give what I need. Maybe it's not what I need. Maybe it's only what I want. I have been so sad rece...
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MelB
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9
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558
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New and confused!
(Preview)
I have been lurking around and I have finally decided that YES maybe I do need Al-Anon more that I wanted to admit. I have an ABF who is really struggling right now and I am finding it hard to cope. He gets to wanting a drink really bad and he just shuts himself out from the rest of the world. He feels like I am...
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stefani74
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8
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534
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He (Reluctantly) Agreed To Rehab
(Preview)
I posted last week that I asked my husband to leave our house for awhile. This weekend we had a long talk. I agreed to let him come back home if he would go to rehab. We did a lot of research online over the weekend and drove past a few of the local centers. He promised to make calls about his insurance cove...
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MidwesternMom
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11
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476
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lost
(Preview)
im in a rut and want to get out.co-dependancy.my husband is now 9 months sober by the grace of god.my kids are now teens and dont need me as much.and my grandparents whom i spent many years looking after passed away this year.my kids are busy having there own lives my husband has his meeting(which i am hap...
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1 day at a time
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5
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380
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Good Info About Bad Behavior
(Preview)
Reading this was extremely helpful for me. This explains all my AH's bad behaviors.... http://www.youarenotcrazy.com/
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LostToday
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1
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329
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fair warning...
(Preview)
earlier this week I posted for the first time about my (musician) AH; he just got back to town, has a gig in the city where we live (he'd been gone a week) and slipped in that there's a good chance the guys would hang out after the gig (they're done playing by 12:30am). I think he is paving the way to stay out a...
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yanksfan51
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4
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376
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Death of a friend
(Preview)
My best friend died, leaving behind her husband and seven year old. This is so devastating, and is making me realize again how powerless we are over others. There is nothing anyone could have done to make her stay. We can't control other people at all. I just feel life is so unpredictable and not turning...
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GreenerGrass
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12
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492
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update
(Preview)
after crying most of the weekend...I got a text during a meeting yesterday from AH. "I want to end this" -- I tried to talk to him over the weekend (big mistake) -- and all he kept saying was that he had to protect himself -- and that is why his lawyer demanded more than half my income in alimony. H...
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rehprof
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4
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364
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where was my reaction?
(Preview)
Hey there, Hubby has been down on work lately. Not much on for him. I have been thinking.. well that means the smoking increases. I accepted that for what it is. I was wrong. I am not 100% sure cos I haven't really been checking up that much but since we got back from holidays I think he has maybe smoked t...
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Lindaoakford
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2
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312
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Pain & more pain!
(Preview)
Real quick: I have been struggling w/ muscle pain & aches for over a week now. I am hoping that it is a minor condition. Other than that, I am doing very well these days. I am just grateful for the life I live & the opportunities I have to grow! Kathleen
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Hoot Nanny
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0
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244
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Sent my regrets to that fight I was invited to
(Preview)
So this morning my AH really, really fought getting out of bed to be with our son so I could get to work (he did this last week, too, every single day--so I would wait and wait and wait, and finally just take the boy to day care myself). I was pleasant but firm about my need to leave, saying that he had promise...
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stephaniej
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10
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335
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Meditation - A Pathway to Inner Peace - Interested?
(Preview)
Some people watch TV; I watch youtube videos. I ran across a youtuve video this evening that I think takes the woo-woo out of meditation. So many think it's where you wrap yourself in a loin cloth and lie on a bed of nails Okay, I'm stretching the truth. But you get my drift. This young woman seems to be a...
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GailMichelle
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5
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480
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My first al-anon meeting
(Preview)
I did it!! Tonight I went to my first meeting. I was so scared walking in, but I want to heal so bad that I took a deep breath and walked in (YAY me!) I have never felt so welcomed, so much love and understanding from complete strangers... Today my Q told me she might go stay with her mom for a while until she...
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apesgirl
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9
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299
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Husband hiding alcohol causing my depression / anxiety
(Preview)
My husband of 5 years (we're both 37) suffered from depression for donkeys years. His mother emotioanlly abused him and she was an alcoholic. He has been drinking for past 3 years (in the evenings and daytime at weekends), normally cider, but it clashes with his depression tablets and he acts weird af...
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cider
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13
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3976
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new here, trying to do 6 mos before major life change....
(Preview)
but feel like i have been doing 20 yrs before major life change! I am seriously considering leaving my marriage of 20 yrs. Binge drinker AH; we have 3 kids and it's tough for me to decide to make this change. He is a musician and is constantly around booze--that definitely ups the ante! I am trying to l...
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yanksfan51
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9
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468
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Trying to keep my serenity
(Preview)
I'm sick with cold symptoms, didn't go to church. A few minutes ago my 26y.o. grandson called and asked me if I could pick him up from the hospital, said he had gone there this morning by ambulance. I told him I was to sick and to call his mother, she is A/A and they don't get alone. I called her after it kep...
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Highlyfavored
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3
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296
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What is going on?!
(Preview)
I haven't been on here in a while. I've been taking time to myself. Detaching from my exABF and trying to live my life in a positive and constructive way. I haven't had a conversation with him in six months and that was also the last time I seen him in person. Our last break up was not a good one. He told m...
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parfait624
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10
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742
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Help with Mom
(Preview)
I'm worried my mom has a drinking problem. Every late afternoon/early evening she starts drinking, and usually has about 3 glasses of wine. If you don't say anything to her she's ok, but if you say even the smallest thing to contradict her it sets her off. She starts shouting and being sarcastic and cyn...
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km93
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4
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332
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As if I can hear God's voice.
(Preview)
God has a plan, it hurts my head with I try to figure it out, he wants me just to trust him... MY mind gets all this 100% ,, MY feelings are a different matter, tears still come sometimes when I don't want them to,, I wish it would stop, it's been a year and a half since he moved out and 9 mths since we stopped eve...
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glad
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8
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484
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"someone's opinion of you does not have to become your reality."
(Preview)
So I did my step 4-7 a while back and was ready to start moving on but then these character defects come popping up like stubborn weeds. This woman at work has been talking about how much she dislikes me and this really urks me.. I feel like we are in highschool and she is at least twenty years older than me....
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Michelle814
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4
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1239
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A Nice Website that Reinforces Al-Anon Teachings
(Preview)
This website that I share with you today is not Al-Anon. I ran across this website during my initial separation with my now ex-husband (we are now reunited after divorcing). I recall sitting in my sparsely furnishes apartment, early in the morning with my favorite cup of tea, kicking back and viewi...
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GailMichelle
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3
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3297
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Feelimg lonley and like I no longer matter
(Preview)
For the past two days I have been feeling so alone. I finally sat down with my partner what was going on with us. She told me that she has to focus on herself right now, she said she needs to be selfish about her recovery... I have given her nothing but my support and understanding, helping her find meeting p...
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apesgirl
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7
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552
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Anyone ever been on Anti_anxiety pills ?
(Preview)
Wondering if anyone has ever taken anti-anxiety pills .. It's been several years in my program and I have gotten alot and I still Feel the way I do ..., etc.. The obssessions are still here and sometimes .. I can't shut them off; it's balance in that it's not Just a matter of choice. If I couldn't do it mysel...
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MeTwo2
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5
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410
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Help
(Preview)
My 17 year old son justed entered rehab for the 3rd time. As you know each time things are worse than the last. I need someone to talk to who I can relate. I have scanned through the topics on this site. Most topics are on A and are with the spouses. Can anybody help
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vicky7214
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3
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387
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How long before he can't hurt me anymore?
(Preview)
I'm still reeling from mediation yesterday. Here I am taking care of EVERYTHING...paying ALL the bills...doing all the repairs on the house, working 60 hours a week....and barely making it on my salary (I owe my parents 7k for loans for a new refrig and my divorce lawyer) Meanwhile, my AH has been unem...
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rehprof
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9
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559
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