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Resentment
(Preview)
Such a strong feeling of resentment I have right now. My AH is making no effort and picks fights for an excuse. I do not engage, but by doing that, I'm told I'm ignoring him. He is not going to meetings, he's hiding his drinking and the drinking has increased. When it comes down to it, I resent him enorm...
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TLD
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10
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809
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Dog Delemia.....
(Preview)
I took my addicted son's dog when he was no longer caring for her (she is a lab/mut mix) she wasn't properly fed or given water because of his irresponsibility and she was left without proper care while he was gone with his drug buddies. The dog was happy with me, we loved her and took good care of her, but la...
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DreamsOver
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6
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393
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Emotionally draining
(Preview)
It's so hard to accept that I'm powerless in this addiction. I'm so close to the point of giving up but I know I can't. He doesn't see the toll it's taking on me emotionally. I know he will end up losing everything he has worked so hard for and it scares me.
One thing I definitely know, I can't control what...
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CassieKellz
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9
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393
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adult children
(Preview)
Hi, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to post this here. For some reason the adult children room won't allow me to write in. For a few years now I have been following the adult children of alcoholics program as well as al-anon. It was through acoa that I came into al-anon. My question has to do with the steps t...
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Tracey C
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23
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977
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hard to be happy
(Preview)
My A finally decided for himself that he needed to get sober. I am so happy that he's taking such a huge step, but I hate seeing how depressed he gets going through his detox.
And I feel so guilty because all I can think about is how many times he's gotten sober just to drink again so in my head I'm telling my...
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CassieKellz
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6
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412
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Husband Stabbed
(Preview)
So the ER in the city my husband buys drugs from calls me to say my he has been stabbed, is stable, and police are there. I guess I will finish up here at work and go see how this story is going to play out. I am already guessing that he is going to hold strong to his story that he isn't using. I feel so many things...
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respect
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12
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576
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Worn down
(Preview)
I feel almost as worn down as I did when working with the ex A. Work is really hard to come by at the moment and I've been working retail. Trouble is I'm not getting enough hours and no matter what I say and do they give all the hours to a new girl who literally just walked in off the street. I've gone the offic...
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orchidlover
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4
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485
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Is this a good idea?
(Preview)
My AH is under the care of both a psychiatrist and a psychologist. I had a friend suggest that I ask him(AH) to attend an appointment with his psychologist and with me. She thinks I need to tell the psychologist what's going on. The late night drinking binges, the hiding of the alcohol, passing out on...
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ilovedogs
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8
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497
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Good night :)
(Preview)
Not as in good night, Irene however I had a good night of sleep woo hoo!!! I got past 330am. I think I slept past 445am .. I did give myself time to wake up too. No spinning in my thinking. I did take some melatonin and that did help. The kids and I enjoyed an evening out with my MIL last night and tonight is m...
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Pushka
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5
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371
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Is there a set format for meetings?
(Preview)
I've looked online but I find examples of differences so I'm not sure if I understand how the meetings are formatted exactly. Our group has two married couples who attend nearly every meeting and I've been uncomfortable recently at how off-the-format things have gotten. During last night's meet...
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gardendelight
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3
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1342
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Let's talk about sex
(Preview)
I am baffled as I write this. My (separated) AH pretty much said he doesn't feel "support" from me while he is in recovery. We are not filing for divorce but he has his own apartment because, well I couldn't handle the lies/chaos any longer and it was pretty bad before that to build to the spli...
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sookie
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15
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612
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After effects for the enabler!
(Preview)
Hello beautiful people, It has been almost a month since I spoke to my ex. The last post was about his trial. As far as the trial goes, I stopped talking to him and the only way I find out is through inmate search and clerk of courts. His baby mama called me again saying he called her and said he was coming out s...
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Julie3310
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9
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626
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New kitty, stress at work, 50 degrees and sunny
(Preview)
Was having a great day and then things just stopped going my way and then I go to the company bathroom and I say the serenity prayer. It helps to pray "let go and let God" too and my music.. that is helping.. jack johnson today.. as for you guys.. you guys help me so much. just getting on and readin...
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Michelle814
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7
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364
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Sleepless in the Midwest ..
(Preview)
Well, it appears that 330am is going to be my witching hour so I'm going to work hard on doing something productive with that time. I'm up and God is listening. Coffee is not ready yet so I don't know if I'm listening yet however .. it's all good. Hugs P :)
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Pushka
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12
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358
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Battling Quickbooks
(Preview)
Ok, so this isn't alcohol related, though I may need some by the time i get done..... (snicker). But, I find myself thinking, ok, i have to accept this because it is the way it is.... (accept the things you cannot change). Egads has it been a frustrating day - learning and doing and trying and growling and...
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likemyheart
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4
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323
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where are the blue skies and rainbows?
(Preview)
many of us thought that when our ah gets sober everything will just be perfect all the struggles will dissapear and we will live perfect little lives.and things are better but the struggles will not stop,but remember that anything worth having is worth fighting for.and ive read that anything we are f...
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1 day at a time
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4
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327
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it is killing me...what could it be?
(Preview)
Whatever it is, it is killing me! I am not going to diagnose my condition today. But, as I sit here I can hardly type. My shoulders hurt, sometimes my back & hips hurt. I am going to a doctor on Friday but can I wait that long? I am concerned that I might have a serious condition. I am actually OK w/ being il...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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412
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Growth and changed perceptions
(Preview)
Wednesday marked my fourth Al-Anon birthday. I was sure to attend a meeting in honor of that and was blessed with some great insights this week in how some of my perceptions have changed over the years, which indicates more growth in my spirituality and maturity. A member at the meeting was sharing abo...
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Aloha
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4
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426
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Phoned a friend
(Preview)
One of the best things I love about Al-anon is people, practically strangers, hand you their phone number and tell you to call if you ever need to talk....and they mean it. How many people that you meet outside of meetings can you say that about? Yesterday I came home to find my diamond necklace missing....
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respect
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7
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421
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same old, same old... yet not
(Preview)
My A fell while drinking last week and hurt himself pretty badly-stitches, IV fluids for blood loss, LOTS of pain, etc. The doctor told him he had to quit drinking. He was so miserable he said he didn't even want a drink. I was hopeful that this might be the start of something good to come out of the bad, yet...
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pineapple
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7
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362
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Brand New to Al-Anon and Looking for Literature Advice?
(Preview)
Hello, I'm Rachel. I am 19 years old and attended my first Al-Anon meeting today with my older sister. Our mother has been an alcoholic for close to 7 years now. It really never sunk in that it had affected me so deeply until my sister (who has worked with recovering teen addicts in a treatment center and i...
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amazinggrace
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5
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378
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New and unsure.
(Preview)
I'm new to all of this, so I apologize if I say, or do anything that is against the etiquette of the board. I left my husband last night after years of progressively worsening alcoholism and lying, which has become worse in the past year. We have a 6 month old and i won't allow my son to be around anyone who ca...
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Sreis44
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8
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556
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Laundry List - adult child related
(Preview)
Hi, The past few days I've been really surprised to notice how much of my day is actually spent worrying about others and what they're up to. Trait 4 of the Laundry List says - We either become alcoholics, marry them or both, or find another compulsive personality such as a workaholic to fulfill our sic...
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Tracey C
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6
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851
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Mourning the Life I Should Have Had
(Preview)
Does anyone else find themselves mourning the life they should have had? I went home last night, once again, to my AH who had obviously been doing something that day, he showed all the tell tell signs. I did my job and didn't say anything, pretended everything was normal. He went to bed at 6pm and even tho...
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surfgirl123
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17
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752
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My best friend is SO resentful!
(Preview)
Hi Everyone! The members of this board have helped me through my hardest and most painful times and I'd just like to say thank you, I'm back in the rooms and so grateful. I am, however, dealing with a situation with my best friend of 15 years. We've known each other since we were children, and she was actua...
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Sangyaa
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7
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688
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My life with the program and...
(Preview)
the court, the judge, the lawyer, the police, the feelings and expectations and wants and desires. That is my life yesterday which I have let go for today cause yesterday is done and I can only work on little parts of that today as they come up and as I have time. I think to myself..."I was just goin...
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Jerry F
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9
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2789
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Meeting tonight
(Preview)
First off just let me say I am so grateful to be a member of alanon especially during this trying time. Who knows what the future holds tonight, this min I am ok. I had a few moments consider the bomb that was dropped, I still haven't decided if I'm in shock still or not. At least the first 48 hours have had...
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Pushka
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3
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251
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Repeated Snaggin...
(Preview)
Last Night i Hit a Meetin at Last Minute & Truly Needed to be there, it was basically about "Owning what is Mine" Over the Weekend I had rearranged my plans out of fear, and basically Once I Owned it, I was then able to move forward...So it was indeed a Topic that I needed to be apart of... Lon...
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Jozie
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4
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307
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Advice Needed
(Preview)
Hello, I am a twenty-two year old addict with emotional problems. I am currently in recovery and sober and spent most of 2010 in two treatment centers to help with both my emotional as well as addiction issues. To make a long story short... My 66 year old father started drinking at home on a regular basi...
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Sagie123
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3
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390
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6 months here
(Preview)
I have been on this board and the ACoA board for about 6 months. For those of you who are ACoA also, come on over and say hi. When I first came here I thought I would give it a go and see how I liked it. I knew what it was about but wasn't sure if it would help me or not. I am so glad I found this. I tried to find my ver...
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Lindaoakford
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4
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279
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I am moving and a bit anxious about it
(Preview)
When my 13 year old finishes her 8th grade year in early June I plan on moving to a bigger city. Away from my exAH and his family and near more jobs. I would love to go back to school and get off of aid. I have 3 part time jobs and sometimes 4 in the Summer in the seasonal small town where I live and it gets old. I hav...
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Breakingfree
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7
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413
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Slowly, but surely.
(Preview)
I began al-anon because i didn't know how to help my A and i wanted to know how i could "cure" him. But i stay here now because I'm not in the best state of mind, I now know I NEED help to be able to not only continue a relationship with him, but to actually be able to live. Everytime I think about him m...
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CassieKellz
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6
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294
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need to vent
(Preview)
I am thinking how MIP people remind me that there are giving, thoughtful people out there. Not relating to people who ruin something that was beautiful. Am in the eviction process. 24 hour outragious behavior one for intentionally destroying the premesis. I knew where ever rock was,ever tree, ever...
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Debilyn
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3
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344
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I know what I know
(Preview)
and I'm really hurting right now there are so many things. I've been under the hallucination that things were on the mend between my spouse and I. I found out that no they are not. I don't know what will happen with him at this point. He's no longer living here as of today and I know there is someone else...
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Pushka
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17
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522
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Some sleep
(Preview)
I did get some sleep it's a little early to start my day and it will be a long day based upon that. Today is a min by min day. I'm so grateful that the sleep that did come was good sleep so I feel rested. Another day begins and I have a lot to do today anyway, sooo I better get on it!! Thank you again for your pray...
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Pushka
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5
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468
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My Sponsor "Talked me off the ledge" Today
(Preview)
I had a relapse today and ended up calling my sponsor. I asked her to help "talk me off of the ledge." An acquaintance told me a few weeks ago the my AH (we've been separated for almost 10 months now) was frequenting a neighborhood bar. I was under the impression that he was going to meetings and...
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Green Eyes
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7
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4122
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Big Step for me today
(Preview)
I made a big step with my AS today. After finding him last night passed out on the couch with a beer in his hand, I (we my husband and I) finally had enough and told him of our boundries. Should of been done 3 months ago but it took this in order for us to say anything. also 3 months going to f2f meetings. We told...
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debbiems
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4
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350
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here we go again
(Preview)
Hi all I am in a weird state of limbo w AH at the moment; basically I have made it clear that I give up...after 20 yrs of marriage, each one charged w the struggle of me hoping praying etc that things would change and he in the pattern of the disease, I have told him that I think we could achieve a healthier rela...
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yanksfan51
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4
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398
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New here. Nice to meet you all.
(Preview)
My name is Kelleigh. I am unsure of what to say in these 'first timers' posts, so I figured it'd be easiest to link you to my video telling you my story. It's very brief, so if you wouldn't mind -- please view it. Look forward to chatting with you all. Goodnight. [video=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...
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movingstillx
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6
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319
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Did I do the right thing? Hurt, lost and confused.
(Preview)
On Feb first I am moving into a new house. I wa supposed to be moving with my alcoholic boyfriend (now ex). We were so excited and loved each other so much, then alcohol ruined it all. We dated the first time around about a year ago when he had 3 months sober or so. He.made it to about 6 before he started drinki...
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Stiff5436
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7
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546
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Silent treatment
(Preview)
I've been getting the silent treatment from AH for almost a week now. He got upset because I didn't want to be woken up at 3:00 in the morning. Is it wrong that I'm finding it quite peaceful? I'm going about my days and taking care of me. I am not going to be the one to apologize for wanting to sleep as I hav...
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TLD
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5
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599
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Holding Husband responsible
(Preview)
Well when my incident first started the lies started unraveling one by one. My AH would not speak to me at all or face me even for visitation of the kids. Then when he did have communication with me it was to further hurt me. So I filed for divorce to protect my kids. He tried to kill himself in front of my d...
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ttpurtee
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6
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357
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Tools Needed
(Preview)
Warning: unfiltered rant ahead: I feel like a failure. My AH succeeded in sucking me into not one, but TWO big fights in the last 24 hours. I let him. I know better, but he knows me so well He knows how to suck me in. To my credit, I have been avioding this explosion all week. There are things that need...
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LostToday
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5
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488
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New to MIP and returning to Al-Anon again
(Preview)
Hello everyone at MIP, I am new to this site and would love to get any help and support that you can offer. I recently moved out from my home where I resided with my AH and our son. I feel like my world has spiraled more out of control after his addiction seemed to become more active (coincidentaly after th...
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Hopeful926
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4
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268
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Great Song to Remind Me of My HP
(Preview)
I Won't Let Go (Song and lyrics by Rascal Flatts) It's like a storm That cuts a path It breaks your will It feels like that You think you're lost But you're not lost On your own You're not alone I will stand by you I will help you through When youve done all you can do And you cant cope I will dry your eyes I will f...
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Green Eyes
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2
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2762
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Trust
(Preview)
I know I have to trust in my HP and I know that in my heart, I really do. Unfortunately, because I've been lied to so many times recently I really have trouble believing anything my AH has to say. I feel like I just don't trust him in any matter, at all, not just relating to his drinking and hiding it. This i...
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ilovedogs
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7
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576
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Communicating via Email
(Preview)
My AH and I have a hard time communicating. Sometimes it's because he's not sober. Sometimes it's because I'm mad. Either way; our relationship is not great right now. It's hard for us to have serious conversations without it becoming a fight. I've found that we do communicate well over e mail. I...
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MidwesternMom
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5
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625
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Need some guidance
(Preview)
My boyfriend is an alcoholic, he's recognized this for years, but has a huge problem with staying sober. He's relapsed a few times since we've been together, he always bounces back and.gets sober within a day or two. He had been sober this last time for a year until a week ago and this is the worst I've see...
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CassieKellz
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6
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317
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Brand new to the Al-anon family
(Preview)
So glad I have the opportunity to share with people who understand!
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CassieKellz
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3
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250
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Hey guys!
(Preview)
I am sorry I have been absent for a while. I kind of closed myself off for the past 2 months. I am back at the hospital working. I thought I was better after my alanon retreat in the mountains and maybe I was. I did let go of a lot of anger and resentments while I was there. I went to my first alanon meeting withou...
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MDK
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5
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478
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Need some guidance
(Preview)
My boyfriend is an alcoholic, he's recognized this for years, but has a huge problem with staying sober. He's relapsed a few times since we've been together, he always bounces back and.gets sober within a day or two. He had been sober this last time for a year until a week ago and this is the worst I've see...
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CassieKellz
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2
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245
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Sometimes Barely Gettin By....
(Preview)
Hi All... Sorry I haven't been "Present" ON the Board Lately, but I have had a Pretty Crappy Go of things these Last 2-3 weeks... And Tho I am Doing my Best to Patient for HP's Will, I know at times I Slip and Need to Dust off & Start again... Cant Say I like it Much at All Really, but I'm Still Mo...
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Jozie
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3
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367
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Obssession
(Preview)
So I'm trying so hard to turn off the obssession wheel that spins in my mind .. I am tired of being tired but as from my shares, I'm getting so much .. It's so funny that when I show up at meetings I really don't have to do anything but listen .. Recovery just comes and yet I feel the work of working through the em...
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MeTwo2
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3
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407
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If you're not happy, it's on you...
(Preview)
I've been going to Al Anon meetings for just over a year now. And this is really one of the most important things I've learned--if you are not happy with your life right now, in spite of all of the horrible things that may be happening, it is your problem and no one else's. It's that simple. Now, that being...
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usedtobeanyer
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6
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469
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Sharing
(Preview)
i don't exactly remember my last share but i've been sharing in face to face meetings on feelings and recognising the inner child in me who stopped growing when she was obssessing on the alcoholics which you know woulda been like about 5 ? I love this program .. I've recognised so much through the awaren...
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MeTwo2
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3
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384
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My Part!!!!!
(Preview)
Hi, I just wanted to share that I'm starting to see my part in the relationships I have. It is not easy seeing that I have caused as much pain and suffering , as they have done to myself. It is not good. This may be time to start my inventory work. Oh my goodness, what a start. Tracey
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Tracey C
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4
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548
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Been a long time...
(Preview)
It was about five years ago that I first visited this board and it was a lifesaver for me. I found that in devoting all my time and energy to my then husband/addict I had no one else to talk to. This board gave me a place to come and share and learn that I wasn't alone, that everyone's story was almost the sam...
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carolinagirl
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5
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528
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Husbands demands
(Preview)
My husband and I are supposed to be separated. I got my own apartment in July but he has nowhere to stay so has been at my place the last week. Here I am at work. While he is home alone in my place (which makes me uncomfortable due to his past of stealing my things to sell). I am already mad because I go to work eve...
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respect
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9
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669
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Is this ME???
(Preview)
So I usually do the online meetings here most mornings... My Abf knows I do them... Yesterday morning we got woke up by a 7am phone call from his "friend" wanting to go out for "breakfast".... I knew what it was really about, whatever, nothing I can do.. So he went and I jumped on my m...
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kris10
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10
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589
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Missing my past tonight .. But then ..
(Preview)
I had a recognition this week that I can read from the courage to change books, how alanon works, hope for today, one day at a time, 12 steps 12 traditions, etc.. over and over and always and still i hear something new .. it never siezes to amaze me .. the spiritual piece of this program .. well this week I had...
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MeTwo2
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2
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292
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