The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
many of us thought that when our ah gets sober everything will just be perfect all the struggles will dissapear and we will live perfect little lives.and things are better but the struggles will not stop,but remember that anything worth having is worth fighting for.and ive read that anything we are feeling our ah is feeling 10 times over.as we are learning to live with this new person he is learning to live with himself.we can go to meeting have coffee with a friend to turn the focus off him and back on us but he cant get out of his own head or away from himself ,and even though the struggle is his and not yours patience and acceptance is key to your own sanity.putting youself in his shoes,even though they dont fit, does help.im trying to practice this myself with my ah as he is now 9 month sober.talking to a long time member helps too,that person has been there too.so when there are no rainbows remember one day at a time,one minute at a time,one second at a time.big hugs to all those struggling in alanon and aa
Hugs, thank you for this share. The biggest blessing I have come to discover is that this to shall pass, feelings aren't facts. Sticking to my own program of recovery is what is key! Hugs p ;)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Something I value so much that I have gained in al-anon is my compassion I feel for my AH.. and not just my AH but any struggling addict/alcoholic in my life. I feel so much compassion for them now. I envision their soul and I just hand them to their HP to wrap them up and love them. Another thing I learned in al-anon that I am grateful for is that the more I focus on me.. the better I feel. I go one day at a time focusing on my progress, not my husbands. I leave his progress now to him, his sponsor, and his HP.. and for that peace of mind and serenity, I am so so so so grateful. I love al-anon so much. Thank you for sharing, 1 day at a time. Youre right that it is not always blue skies and rainbows.. but the more I focus on me, and the more I think to the positive, the more compassion my HP grants me as I pray to let go of judgment and control, the more days the skies seem blue to me, even when its raining or snowing. Its weird.
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Michelle!
No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.
I need this today. I need the reminder he's going through so much more than I am. It's amazing how you can have those rainbows one day and the next is full blown thunderstorms! Patience and acceptance...one second at a time is how I am gonna have to do it today! And deep breaths and my HP!
.and things are better but the struggles will not stop,but remember that anything worth having is worth fighting for.and ive read that anything we are feeling our ah is feeling 10 times over.as we are learning to live with this new person he is learning to live with himself.we can go to meeting have coffee with a friend to turn the focus off him and back on us but he cant get out of his own head or away from himself ,and even though the struggle is his and not yours patience and acceptance is key to your own sanity.putting youself in his shoes,even though they dont fit, does help.im trying to practice this myself with my ah as he is now 9 month sober.talking to a long time member helps too,that person has been there too.so when there are no rainbows remember one day at a time,one minute at a time,one second at a time.big hugs to all those struggling in alanon and aa