Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

SpiderArcana · SpiderArcana

Once I learned how to set boundaries for myself one of them what that I wouldn't get dragged into the 'poor me' party my husband sometimes throws for himself. He's been in a mood lately, so when a co-worker called in and left him with a crap-ton of work today, he started texting me. Him: So (co-worker) ca...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Yeah, I think it is possible that I could be working on a new me. I went to the meeting I have been missing & am already getting a new perspective. I am already seeing things differently. It seems easier. I don't know if it going to last but my head is clearer. I am enjoying sleeping in even though I eat br...

1911A1 · 1911A1

...DRAMA addict, that is! My mom was the queen of, well, drama queens. Her moods would swing wildly and unpredictably, which gave rise to the hypervigilance that is a hallmark of an ACOA. (Disclaimer: neither of my parents were alcoholics, but the family disease "infected" them - and...

oldergal · oldergal

When I first came to this forum/board I listened first, and then when I decided I was brave enough to post I did. Knowing that anything I said or revealed or asked would be fair game to any one on this public message board. I knew there was kindness and understanding here, but I also knew that this board is w...

Oats · Oats

This morning I find myself feeling like I am slipping into a dark, deep hole of hopelessness. I am trying hard to turn over my son to my HP. We have had several years of all of this pain and anxiety trying to deal with the beast of a disease. I feel like we are losing the battle and he is slipping away throug...

neshema2 · neshema2

I discovered something about me since joining this club...... I drive into the parking lot and i see new SUV's and the "hard body" chicks walking in w/their up to date gym attire and i see them on their Iphone 5s's and I look at me I drive a Ford Ranger, now 12 years old, but kept nice, I use an Ipho...

barbaralewis · barbaralewis

she went to crisis intervention ctr, rehab, left rehab ama, faked sobriety, attempted suicide, was hospitalized, send to state hosp as 1013, then another rehab for a month, which worked...she has been out for 3 mos. she goes to 2-3 mtgs a day plus out pt counceling and meds. she is proud of her monthly...

Diva · Diva

he ended up being flown to Philadelphia for some kind of emergency surgery. I don't know what kind of surgery except that it was abdominal and no doubt exacerbated by his alcoholism. He named me as his emergency contact, but I have done no "contacting." I have come to the point of thinki...

sadsusie · sadsusie

Happy New year. I say that with just a twinge of sarcasm. Just a twinge. I suppose I always hang on to a little bit of hope the my AH finally realizes that he needs to take action. I imagine that he is letting his denial cloud how crappy this disease is, which makes it easier to postpone his recovery. Well, t...

New User - someone to listen? · Hopingfor

Hi all, I am a new user to this site and a little bit nervous but here goes.... I have been with my ABF for nearly six years and living together for 5, I say he is an alcoholic but the truth is I am not sure what he is, a possible binge drinker but is it the same thing? Sorry I don't want to offend anyone with the inc...

neshema2 · neshema2

well, today is Jan 1, 2014....I am lookin forward with an open, positive mind..... headed out to my new club to "play" and i need it... last night my ptsd began to kick in.....as ny eve was one time i at age 15, to get away frm the offender's advances, I locked myself in the bathroom w/a bottle of...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I got rained down on Monday and promised a make up today and so I went in. No rain today other than a very very gentle drizzle just when work was done...kinda a kiss. When I started an elderly couple walked from the lobby to seaside to enjoy the view...it was enjoyable and always is after a storm. Upon t...

neshema2 · neshema2

Hey all WEnt to club and was not "myself" but mostly myself and i met this really neat lady and she had a basketball and she said "you play???" I told her all my trophies were in either tennis or pool (billiards) or horse shows, lol...No basketball, but I used to play in HS.... so w...

imom · imom

The other day, I was watching a morning talk show and a life coach was on discussing goals in the new year. She suggested leaving the crumbs behind so you can eat the cake. I really like this suggestion. I have been obsessed with the crap my AH has put us through. He is in recovery and doing well, and when...

New user first al anon nye with AHq · TryingHard2013

So last night was Hard. I attended my first al anon meeting online and it was helpful to read other shares from people struggling with their AH. Ialso replied to more posts because I know that no matter what I post it feels really good that someone says that sucks I'm sorry try to move on. I read the replies...

New user first nye with AW · TryingHard2013

So last night was Hard. I attended my first al anon meeting online and it was helpful to read other shares from people struggling with their AW. I also replied to more posts because I know that no matter what I post it feels really good that someone says that sucks I'm sorry try to move on. I read the replies...

el-cee · el-cee

Exactly 3 years ago today the largest crisis in my life came to a disasterous head. A horrible incident occured that I dont even feel the need to go into. That is actually the point of my post. It did pop into my mind a couple of times over this holiday period but!!!! Did I feel the need to relive it, discuss i...

lmyya · lmyya

My AH and I have a 9-month-old baby. We love him more than anything and are great parents, except to the extent that our problems may affect him. I want to know whether anyone has had major power struggles with an A and has been able to heal the relationship. My husband hasn't had anything to drink in ab...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey Guys, My name is slogan_Jim and I am grateful member of al-anon. I am concerned. Over the holidays I have had some issues with isolation arise that have had me questioning what this is really about. I am turning down social functions for other social functions or not doing anything at all but I have j...

Jen61 · Jen61

So far so good for 2014. 2013 was a rough year for me so am hoping 2014 will be better. I am going to take each day very positive and take better care of me.

Divedet · Divedet

This has been the worst year, I think, in my life. AGF moved out, 2 days before Christmas, took the kids with her, and seems to be "blocking" them from talking to me...don't hear from them, they don't respond to calls and texts, and she keeps saying she'll have them call me, but then doesn't. ...

likemyheart · likemyheart

My daughter's car's starter quit doing its job, has sat in its place for a month waiting for some human to take pity on it and fix it. Weather was bone cold, then as it warmed up, I bought the new equipment, jacked up the car, got on my back and slid under the car and said, uh..... Keep in mind I am fairly mechan...

Linda · Linda

I guess to start out I am angry. I feel as though I am getting back on a rollercoaster ride that I really dont want to go on again.. I am really not sure I can. In November my husband went to treatment and I seen changes that I never felt were possible. I feel during this time I suffered alot financial, emotion...

abell · abell

scared to say it after 6 months apart from ex-AHBF I went over to his place (his mom got for him) and told him how much i missed him... high to be around him then the next day depressed, anxiety, anger, confused... he drinks a lot nowadays since i'm not around anymore to make him hide it and try to be sober aro...

Jerry F · Jerry F

A few hours ago I stood in my garage and shouted at HP...you gotta stop this now...This was 36 hours of heavy rain and a lightning and thunder storm right over Hilo. "If it has no use...why do it"? an attempt to sponsor the HP that one was. Okay an hour or so later the rain and thunder and lig...

farmerswife · farmerswife

it took all I had to pick up this computer today what do you do when you physically, mentally emotionally can not take any more? when your so deep down in a hole surrounded by darkness crumpled up in a puddle of despair knowing you cannot take anymore pain but all you options will cause you more pain hati...

DragonMoon · DragonMoon

New to the board. Really need to vent somewhere. hubbs has been in aa for about a year now, but the last 3 years have been ****. We're both vets & he's 100% disabled. Guess what my finances are tied to. We got him off the pain meds this summer when he was put on naltrexone (?) after antabuse didn't faze h...

polly2 · polly2

Humbled and long rant I do believe the Holidays have thrown me. Living away from my family, I am able to work on one piece of my dysfunction/codependancy at a time. I can pull out pieces of my shattered childhood/early adulthood: examine them, read a book, do therapy, and add some experience to my adult...

Gaby · Gaby

I just want to make it clear.. !!! Financially I am ok.. I have a great job and the time to take off. My daughter by far is not being neglected.. I have an amazing husband that stands by me to get me up when I fall..Yes I'm depressed about my son and his choices. It's normal. I have never been in this situation b...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I thought I would use a word that I never hear much to describe how I feel about approaching another new year. I am not really looking forward to 2014 right now. I know that it will be whatever I make it. I have the steering wheel & can determine what direction I want to go. Mind you, my HP will be right the...

el-cee · el-cee

Should auld aquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should auld acquantance be forgot and auld lang syne. Happy new year from me here in scotland.x

TryingHard2013 · TryingHard2013

I'm new to this board. I found it searching the internet for al anon support. I have not been to a meeting yet and am looking forward to my first one. this board has basically helped me survive this week. I have been with my partner 11 years and we have been married for 3 . We have a 2 year old daughter. In April...

tweety23 · tweety23

he is not one to drink every day or even every week - maybe bc he is on antidepressants? but when he does it is more often then not a huge binge. anyway although we've been together for a long long time.. and frankly met by partying and drinking together.. i no longer want to be around him when he is drinking....

neshema2 · neshema2

I would like to thank our Bubblegum for stepping up to the plate...new years eve and she chaired a meeting... it was a goodie, too..... luckily my "chat room" mgr. duties on my sis's radio show closed up early enough for me to attend... Bubblegum thanks for your service....it was a good meet...

dotandthekangaroo · dotandthekangaroo

Hey all, I found this message board because I've only been to a handful of Al-Anon meetings and I don't have a sponsor yet, but I really needed to connect with the community right now. Tonight, on the phone, I told my mother that my husband has been going to AA and that I've been been going to Al-Anon meetin...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

This year has been such a mixed bag for me and my family. It started with my AH passing away the first week of January. Then I had to give up our home of 25 years to the bank. My mom fell while on a walk with my on my birthday in March. She broke her arm in several places and will never have full use of her arm again....

neshema2 · neshema2

Today i registered at my new fitness club.... got all my paperwork...got orientation on Thurs. to talk about my fitness goals AND they let me (even tho ins. starts tomorrow) start today.... I jumped right into the pool....swam laps.....LOVED it....sat in whirl pool w/some nice folks and chatted...

TryingHard2013 · TryingHard2013

I'm new to this board. I found it searching the internet for al anon support. I have not been to a meeting yet and am looking forward to my first one. this board has basically helped me survive this week. I have been with my partner 11 years and we have been married for 3 . We have a 2 year old daughter. In April...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

I came to MIP because it seemed like a place where I could learn to be the best Melly I could be. I felt like I could remove the chains of "I'm not a good enough mother, I'm not a good enough worker, I'm not a good enough girlfriend, I'm not good enough" and just talk about me, without shame. It ha...

texasgal · texasgal

Ive been in my own apt for 2 weeks and I worry about my husbands safety constantly esp. at night. During the day he will text me and he seems ok but at night he blocks my number and I have no communication with him. I know exactly what he is doing, he's drinking. I know I cant do anything about his sobriety he ha...

Gaby · Gaby

So update on my son.. So much has happened.. After falling into his trap of manipulation.. And me admitting NOW.. I knew what I was getting myself into. My son called me on Friday around 10 pm collect.. He said "mom I F'up" I'm cold.. I'm on such and such corner.. I said I'll call 911 and of cours...

lgnutah · lgnutah

Im sure that thread title sounds like I am a heartless person, but let me explain. My husband is an recovered (recovering?) A. He never worked a program. After many years ofndestructive drinking, denial, and finally a confrontation from his recovered A son, he talked to his Dr, an using medical su...

Venera · Venera

Just curious, how did it happened)) what was your invovment? i understand the CCC thing and i understand that there is nothing i can do or say that would stop him, but i am just curious, when did u know he is for real quitting?

neshema2 · neshema2

I want to wish EVERYONE a HAPPY NEW YEAR.....I smell good things for this upcoming year....dunno why, maybe i just hate giving up, LOLOL...but really, I smell good things..... May this year bring better health, better wealth, better love and better self expression to all of us..... and PLEASE BE SAF...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

I've long been a believer that how you see in the New year reflects on how you will spend your year. It seems to hold true for me, in any event. So, New Years 2 years ago...well, ABF was front and centre of my world. He chose to spend the night getting drunk and playing his computer game. I bitterly worked on a...

exawstedmom · exawstedmom

My 38 y/o daughter just lost her very well paying job due to lateness to work because of drinking the night before. This happened almost 2 weeks ago. Today she told me it was my fault because I did not stop her from drinking when she was in high school. I am so tired of the whole scene.

Gaby · Gaby

Today was tough again. I did not go to work. I stayed in bed and watched t.v. All day. I can not stop thinking about the well being of my son. But I took care of me and rested my mind. I have tooken what I have done to my son so hard. People tell me get out of gods way. At one time my son has told me if I would have left h...

lookingup · lookingup

My a b/f has been renting a room from me for the last several maths a b/f is not active in his drinking right now he had been bidding his bottles in my barn thinking I would not find them but I did stumble upon his bottles I knew he was acting diff. In the afternoons when he got in from work but I really could not p...

lookingup · lookingup

My daughter has been trying to contact me over the internet but I've been ignoring.her her hubby wsent military 7years ago daughter was all for it with 2 babies they now have 3 children they were all I had and were my world long distance relationships just don't work good when I saw my oldest grandchild a...

Milehi-tlc · Milehi-tlc

So I really thought I was doing better than I am. My marriage of 30 years came to a sudden end when my emotionally abusive AH started drinking again. He got angrier and more verbally abusive quickly. He was dry for 20 years, started drinking again and then filed for divorce. And I quit reacting. I wo...

Diva · Diva

My life as a drama queen is difficult, but I am getting better at it. He still drinks from time to time, and he's mean as hell when he does. Not physically, but the mental abuse has all but killed my zest for life. I have gone from a fun-loving, involved gal to a hermit whose trust in the world and those hum...

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

Well, it is that time of year again.... my AH is off to Arizona to get out of this cold, unforgiving north country. He is currently in Southern Kansas and feeling better already. The weather this winter has been brutal and we have many months to go. So many days of -20 to -30 with wind chills in the -50 to -6...

pinkchip · pinkchip

The ring looks like this:

Hope2000 · Hope2000

I really am crazy, I'm obsessed with my AH husband to the point that if it's not my fear of alcohol it's my fear of cheating. I quit looking for signs of drinking and he has started drinking everyday. I've decided to keep quite and he's brought beer home every night this week. When he starts drinking he sta...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

lol. I know, I know, there's no point trying to understand. But ABF has just come home, babbling after 3 or 4 quick beers, and announced that he's very tired, has to start early in the morning and therefore his plan is to stay up all night. After telling me just yesterday that someone was fired for turning...

Venera · Venera

Any though really appreciated! We are in Mexico with 3 kids. AH is drinking for the 3rd day nonstop, so usually we depend on him for driving, translating etc (we go often to our house, he speaks spanish, handles all the money, drives rentla car because i cant use stick shift) we had been here at least ten t...

Jozie · Jozie

Funny How things work out... Those that Read my Last thread know that there is more Addiction Rif-Raf goin on in my Family that include my 2 oldest Grandkids! And Because it Happened 4 days before Our Celebrated holiday of Christmas, it brought lots of Tears, Hurt, Pain, to an 8-10 yrs... Well i have bee...

Gaby · Gaby

So my son left his sober living house!! I just knew it was going to happen.. I want to make it clear!! I do go to alanon.. I do not have a Sponsor that has much time for anyone any more. I will work on finding one.. My only strong face to face meeting is only on Mondays in the evening. I have very little fellowshi...

Raven Juniper · Raven Juniper

Today was a real test for me. I had to ride around with ABF for a couple of hours while he looked for parts at the auto stores in town. I'm sure you all know what that's like:/. I almost lost my cool a few times with his tantrums, rudeness, and the fact that his ADD almost got our borrowed car demolished and us k...

cwya · cwya

This time of year is very difficult for me as it is for many people. But this year all the anniversaries surrounding my son and his death are really throwing me off kilter. Starting in October these 3 months are just one grief after another but December is really hard for me. My son was killed in a really ho...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Boundaries, tantrums, and thank HP for support systems (Preview) Once I learned how to set boundaries for myself one of them what that I wouldn't get dragged into the 'poor me' party my husband sometimes throws for himself. He's been in a mood lately, so when a co-worker called in and left him with a crap-ton of work today, he started texting me. Him: So (co-worker) ca...	SpiderArcana	4	438	Jan 2, 2014 by Mimi3
	new year, new me! (Preview) Yeah, I think it is possible that I could be working on a new me. I went to the meeting I have been missing & am already getting a new perspective. I am already seeing things differently. It seems easier. I don't know if it going to last but my head is clearer. I am enjoying sleeping in even though I eat br...	Hoot Nanny	5	258	Jan 2, 2014 by grateful2be
	I'm a recovering addict... (Preview) ...DRAMA addict, that is! My mom was the queen of, well, drama queens. Her moods would swing wildly and unpredictably, which gave rise to the hypervigilance that is a hallmark of an ACOA. (Disclaimer: neither of my parents were alcoholics, but the family disease "infected" them - and...	1911A1	10	457	Jan 2, 2014 by neshema2
	The Things People Post (Preview) When I first came to this forum/board I listened first, and then when I decided I was brave enough to post I did. Knowing that anything I said or revealed or asked would be fair game to any one on this public message board. I knew there was kindness and understanding here, but I also knew that this board is w...	oldergal	17	562	Jan 2, 2014 by neshema2
	Trying to let go of beloved son (Preview) This morning I find myself feeling like I am slipping into a dark, deep hole of hopelessness. I am trying hard to turn over my son to my HP. We have had several years of all of this pain and anxiety trying to deal with the beast of a disease. I feel like we are losing the battle and he is slipping away throug...	Oats	12	426	Jan 2, 2014 by Oats
	WHO wants to keep up with the "Jones's"???? (Preview) I discovered something about me since joining this club...... I drive into the parking lot and i see new SUV's and the "hard body" chicks walking in w/their up to date gym attire and i see them on their Iphone 5s's and I look at me I drive a Ford Ranger, now 12 years old, but kept nice, I use an Ipho...	neshema2	11	511	Jan 2, 2014 by lgnutah
	Is it wrong for me to ask my A dtr what step she is on? (Preview) she went to crisis intervention ctr, rehab, left rehab ama, faked sobriety, attempted suicide, was hospitalized, send to state hosp as 1013, then another rehab for a month, which worked...she has been out for 3 mos. she goes to 2-3 mtgs a day plus out pt counceling and meds. she is proud of her monthly...	barbaralewis	9	2598	Jan 2, 2014 by barbaralewis
	This time…. (Preview) he ended up being flown to Philadelphia for some kind of emergency surgery. I don't know what kind of surgery except that it was abdominal and no doubt exacerbated by his alcoholism. He named me as his emergency contact, but I have done no "contacting." I have come to the point of thinki...	Diva	6	268	Jan 2, 2014 by grateful2be
	Hope for ME just for Today (Preview) Happy New year. I say that with just a twinge of sarcasm. Just a twinge. I suppose I always hang on to a little bit of hope the my AH finally realizes that he needs to take action. I imagine that he is letting his denial cloud how crappy this disease is, which makes it easier to postpone his recovery. Well, t...	sadsusie	5	369	Jan 2, 2014 by el-cee
	New User - someone to listen? (Preview) Hi all, I am a new user to this site and a little bit nervous but here goes.... I have been with my ABF for nearly six years and living together for 5, I say he is an alcoholic but the truth is I am not sure what he is, a possible binge drinker but is it the same thing? Sorry I don't want to offend anyone with the inc...	Hopingfor	13	481	Jan 2, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	weird start to my New Years--could use some alanon hugs..PLEEZE (Preview) well, today is Jan 1, 2014....I am lookin forward with an open, positive mind..... headed out to my new club to "play" and i need it... last night my ptsd began to kick in.....as ny eve was one time i at age 15, to get away frm the offender's advances, I locked myself in the bathroom w/a bottle of...	neshema2	14	402	Jan 2, 2014 by farmerswife
	Making funny (Preview) I got rained down on Monday and promised a make up today and so I went in. No rain today other than a very very gentle drizzle just when work was done...kinda a kiss. When I started an elderly couple walked from the lobby to seaside to enjoy the view...it was enjoyable and always is after a storm. Upon t...	Jerry F	12	344	Jan 2, 2014 by el-cee
	Surrender and some basketball!!!! (Preview) Hey all WEnt to club and was not "myself" but mostly myself and i met this really neat lady and she had a basketball and she said "you play???" I told her all my trophies were in either tennis or pool (billiards) or horse shows, lol...No basketball, but I used to play in HS.... so w...	neshema2	4	277	Jan 2, 2014 by MorningGlory
	crumbs (Preview) The other day, I was watching a morning talk show and a life coach was on discussing goals in the new year. She suggested leaving the crumbs behind so you can eat the cake. I really like this suggestion. I have been obsessed with the crap my AH has put us through. He is in recovery and doing well, and when...	imom	9	381	Jan 2, 2014 by milkwood
	New user first al anon nye with AHq (Preview) So last night was Hard. I attended my first al anon meeting online and it was helpful to read other shares from people struggling with their AH. Ialso replied to more posts because I know that no matter what I post it feels really good that someone says that sucks I'm sorry try to move on. I read the replies...	TryingHard2013	12	451	Jan 2, 2014 by neshema2
	New user first nye with AW (Preview) So last night was Hard. I attended my first al anon meeting online and it was helpful to read other shares from people struggling with their AW. I also replied to more posts because I know that no matter what I post it feels really good that someone says that sucks I'm sorry try to move on. I read the replies...	TryingHard2013	9	375	Jan 2, 2014 by neshema2
	im getting better. (Preview) Exactly 3 years ago today the largest crisis in my life came to a disasterous head. A horrible incident occured that I dont even feel the need to go into. That is actually the point of my post. It did pop into my mind a couple of times over this holiday period but!!!! Did I feel the need to relive it, discuss i...	el-cee	8	211	Jan 2, 2014 by neshema2
	Can you come back from a situation like this (married to nondrinking A) (Preview) My AH and I have a 9-month-old baby. We love him more than anything and are great parents, except to the extent that our problems may affect him. I want to know whether anyone has had major power struggles with an A and has been able to heal the relationship. My husband hasn't had anything to drink in ab...	lmyya	9	388	Jan 2, 2014 by hotrod
	I feel like I am isolating. Input requested. (Preview) Hey Guys, My name is slogan_Jim and I am grateful member of al-anon. I am concerned. Over the holidays I have had some issues with isolation arise that have had me questioning what this is really about. I am turning down social functions for other social functions or not doing anything at all but I have j...	slogan_jim	8	471	Jan 1, 2014 by neshema2
	Happy New Year to All! (Preview) So far so good for 2014. 2013 was a rough year for me so am hoping 2014 will be better. I am going to take each day very positive and take better care of me.	Jen61	6	234	Jan 1, 2014 by bud
	Thank God for this program. (Preview) This has been the worst year, I think, in my life. AGF moved out, 2 days before Christmas, took the kids with her, and seems to be "blocking" them from talking to me...don't hear from them, they don't respond to calls and texts, and she keeps saying she'll have them call me, but then doesn't. ...	Divedet	9	334	Jan 1, 2014 by neshema2
	Ending the year on a really nice note (Preview) My daughter's car's starter quit doing its job, has sat in its place for a month waiting for some human to take pity on it and fix it. Weather was bone cold, then as it warmed up, I bought the new equipment, jacked up the car, got on my back and slid under the car and said, uh..... Keep in mind I am fairly mechan...	likemyheart	8	436	Jan 1, 2014 by Jerry F
	my heart is broken (Preview) I guess to start out I am angry. I feel as though I am getting back on a rollercoaster ride that I really dont want to go on again.. I am really not sure I can. In November my husband went to treatment and I seen changes that I never felt were possible. I feel during this time I suffered alot financial, emotion...	Linda	10	873	Jan 1, 2014 by TryingHard2013
	Holidays were hard- back with the Ex (Preview) scared to say it after 6 months apart from ex-AHBF I went over to his place (his mom got for him) and told him how much i missed him... high to be around him then the next day depressed, anxiety, anger, confused... he drinks a lot nowadays since i'm not around anymore to make him hide it and try to be sober aro...	abell	7	461	Jan 1, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Really!!! (Preview) A few hours ago I stood in my garage and shouted at HP...you gotta stop this now...This was 36 hours of heavy rain and a lightning and thunder storm right over Hilo. "If it has no use...why do it"? an attempt to sponsor the HP that one was. Okay an hour or so later the rain and thunder and lig...	Jerry F	23	485	Jan 1, 2014 by grateful2be
	down in a hole (Preview) it took all I had to pick up this computer today what do you do when you physically, mentally emotionally can not take any more? when your so deep down in a hole surrounded by darkness crumpled up in a puddle of despair knowing you cannot take anymore pain but all you options will cause you more pain hati...	farmerswife	19	424	Jan 1, 2014 by TryingHard2013
	I need a good cry (Preview) New to the board. Really need to vent somewhere. hubbs has been in aa for about a year now, but the last 3 years have been ****. We're both vets & he's 100% disabled. Guess what my finances are tied to. We got him off the pain meds this summer when he was put on naltrexone (?) after antabuse didn't faze h...	DragonMoon	10	395	Jan 1, 2014 by TryingHard2013
	newbie here.....but feling very old (Preview) Humbled and long rant I do believe the Holidays have thrown me. Living away from my family, I am able to work on one piece of my dysfunction/codependancy at a time. I can pull out pieces of my shattered childhood/early adulthood: examine them, read a book, do therapy, and add some experience to my adult...	polly2	7	426	Jan 1, 2014 by cwya
	Responding !!!!! (Preview) I just want to make it clear.. !!! Financially I am ok.. I have a great job and the time to take off. My daughter by far is not being neglected.. I have an amazing husband that stands by me to get me up when I fall..Yes I'm depressed about my son and his choices. It's normal. I have never been in this situation b...	Gaby	26	664	Jan 1, 2014 by likemyheart
	oh cripe another new year? (Preview) I thought I would use a word that I never hear much to describe how I feel about approaching another new year. I am not really looking forward to 2014 right now. I know that it will be whatever I make it. I have the steering wheel & can determine what direction I want to go. Mind you, my HP will be right the...	Hoot Nanny	5	336	Jan 1, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	auld lang syne (Preview) Should auld aquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should auld acquantance be forgot and auld lang syne. Happy new year from me here in scotland.x	el-cee	10	247	Jan 1, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	New to the board (Preview) I'm new to this board. I found it searching the internet for al anon support. I have not been to a meeting yet and am looking forward to my first one. this board has basically helped me survive this week. I have been with my partner 11 years and we have been married for 3 . We have a 2 year old daughter. In April...	TryingHard2013	9	405	Jan 1, 2014 by Courage
	how do i say this? or do I? (Preview) he is not one to drink every day or even every week - maybe bc he is on antidepressants? but when he does it is more often then not a huge binge. anyway although we've been together for a long long time.. and frankly met by partying and drinking together.. i no longer want to be around him when he is drinking....	tweety23	15	555	Jan 1, 2014 by grateful2be
	thanking Bubblegum for stepping up (Preview) I would like to thank our Bubblegum for stepping up to the plate...new years eve and she chaired a meeting... it was a goodie, too..... luckily my "chat room" mgr. duties on my sis's radio show closed up early enough for me to attend... Bubblegum thanks for your service....it was a good meet...	neshema2	0	291	Dec 31, 2013 by neshema2
	Reaching Out: Shame and Anxiety (Preview) Hey all, I found this message board because I've only been to a handful of Al-Anon meetings and I don't have a sponsor yet, but I really needed to connect with the community right now. Tonight, on the phone, I told my mother that my husband has been going to AA and that I've been been going to Al-Anon meetin...	dotandthekangaroo	11	545	Jan 1, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	The Roller-Coaster Year (Preview) This year has been such a mixed bag for me and my family. It started with my AH passing away the first week of January. Then I had to give up our home of 25 years to the bank. My mom fell while on a walk with my on my birthday in March. She broke her arm in several places and will never have full use of her arm again....	Green Eyes	5	311	Dec 31, 2013 by SerenityRUS
	starting my new year and my new me early (Preview) Today i registered at my new fitness club.... got all my paperwork...got orientation on Thurs. to talk about my fitness goals AND they let me (even tho ins. starts tomorrow) start today.... I jumped right into the pool....swam laps.....LOVED it....sat in whirl pool w/some nice folks and chatted...	neshema2	19	411	Dec 31, 2013 by neshema2
	The bottom (Preview) I'm new to this board. I found it searching the internet for al anon support. I have not been to a meeting yet and am looking forward to my first one. this board has basically helped me survive this week. I have been with my partner 11 years and we have been married for 3 . We have a 2 year old daughter. In April...	TryingHard2013	3	350	Dec 31, 2013 by TryingHard2013
	What MIP is to me. (Preview) I came to MIP because it seemed like a place where I could learn to be the best Melly I could be. I felt like I could remove the chains of "I'm not a good enough mother, I'm not a good enough worker, I'm not a good enough girlfriend, I'm not good enough" and just talk about me, without shame. It ha...	Melly1248	10	417	Dec 31, 2013 by Breakingfree
	accepting my husband the way he is (Preview) Ive been in my own apt for 2 weeks and I worry about my husbands safety constantly esp. at night. During the day he will text me and he seems ok but at night he blocks my number and I have no communication with him. I know exactly what he is doing, he's drinking. I know I cant do anything about his sobriety he ha...	texasgal	5	383	Dec 31, 2013 by TryingHard2013
	Depression kicked in full force.. (Preview) So update on my son.. So much has happened.. After falling into his trap of manipulation.. And me admitting NOW.. I knew what I was getting myself into. My son called me on Friday around 10 pm collect.. He said "mom I F'up" I'm cold.. I'm on such and such corner.. I said I'll call 911 and of cours...	Gaby	9	430	Dec 31, 2013 by lgnutah
	glad my husband got sick (Preview) Im sure that thread title sounds like I am a heartless person, but let me explain. My husband is an recovered (recovering?) A. He never worked a program. After many years ofndestructive drinking, denial, and finally a confrontation from his recovered A son, he talked to his Dr, an using medical su...	lgnutah	4	338	Dec 31, 2013 by grateful2be
	For those whos A decided to completely quit drinking.. (Preview) Just curious, how did it happened)) what was your invovment? i understand the CCC thing and i understand that there is nothing i can do or say that would stop him, but i am just curious, when did u know he is for real quitting?	Venera	8	471	Dec 31, 2013 by lgnutah
	HAPPY NEW YEAR (Preview) I want to wish EVERYONE a HAPPY NEW YEAR.....I smell good things for this upcoming year....dunno why, maybe i just hate giving up, LOLOL...but really, I smell good things..... May this year bring better health, better wealth, better love and better self expression to all of us..... and PLEASE BE SAF...	neshema2	5	226	Dec 31, 2013 by grateful2be
	NYE 2013. (Preview) I've long been a believer that how you see in the New year reflects on how you will spend your year. It seems to hold true for me, in any event. So, New Years 2 years ago...well, ABF was front and centre of my world. He chose to spend the night getting drunk and playing his computer game. I bitterly worked on a...	Melly1248	18	397	Dec 31, 2013 by grateful2be
	Dealing with an alcoholic adult child. (Preview) My 38 y/o daughter just lost her very well paying job due to lateness to work because of drinking the night before. This happened almost 2 weeks ago. Today she told me it was my fault because I did not stop her from drinking when she was in high school. I am so tired of the whole scene.	exawstedmom	9	760	Dec 31, 2013 by yooper74
	Did not go to work... (Preview) Today was tough again. I did not go to work. I stayed in bed and watched t.v. All day. I can not stop thinking about the well being of my son. But I took care of me and rested my mind. I have tooken what I have done to my son so hard. People tell me get out of gods way. At one time my son has told me if I would have left h...	Gaby	19	538	Dec 31, 2013 by Mattie
	thinking about marrying again (Preview) My a b/f has been renting a room from me for the last several maths a b/f is not active in his drinking right now he had been bidding his bottles in my barn thinking I would not find them but I did stumble upon his bottles I knew he was acting diff. In the afternoons when he got in from work but I really could not p...	lookingup	7	401	Dec 31, 2013 by neshema2
	feeling sad,sorry and hurt (Preview) My daughter has been trying to contact me over the internet but I've been ignoring.her her hubby wsent military 7years ago daughter was all for it with 2 babies they now have 3 children they were all I had and were my world long distance relationships just don't work good when I saw my oldest grandchild a...	lookingup	11	573	Dec 31, 2013 by lookingup
	Next shoe to drop (Preview) So I really thought I was doing better than I am. My marriage of 30 years came to a sudden end when my emotionally abusive AH started drinking again. He got angrier and more verbally abusive quickly. He was dry for 20 years, started drinking again and then filed for divorce. And I quit reacting. I wo...	Milehi-tlc	9	442	Dec 31, 2013 by maryjane
	MY LIFE AS A "DRAMA QUEEN"... (Preview) My life as a drama queen is difficult, but I am getting better at it. He still drinks from time to time, and he's mean as hell when he does. Not physically, but the mental abuse has all but killed my zest for life. I have gone from a fun-loving, involved gal to a hermit whose trust in the world and those hum...	Diva	7	451	Dec 31, 2013 by neshema2
	Gone again..... (Preview) Well, it is that time of year again.... my AH is off to Arizona to get out of this cold, unforgiving north country. He is currently in Southern Kansas and feeling better already. The weather this winter has been brutal and we have many months to go. So many days of -20 to -30 with wind chills in the -50 to -6...	Sweet Stanley	4	316	Dec 31, 2013 by SerenityRUS
	By popular demand: (Preview) The ring looks like this:	pinkchip	16	450	Dec 31, 2013 by Tasha
	Crazy (Preview) I really am crazy, I'm obsessed with my AH husband to the point that if it's not my fear of alcohol it's my fear of cheating. I quit looking for signs of drinking and he has started drinking everyday. I've decided to keep quite and he's brought beer home every night this week. When he starts drinking he sta...	Hope2000	20	526	Dec 31, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	eh? little rambly vent...sorry.... (Preview) lol. I know, I know, there's no point trying to understand. But ABF has just come home, babbling after 3 or 4 quick beers, and announced that he's very tired, has to start early in the morning and therefore his plan is to stay up all night. After telling me just yesterday that someone was fired for turning...	Melly1248	22	619	Dec 31, 2013 by Melly1248
	Explanation to kids? (Preview) Any though really appreciated! We are in Mexico with 3 kids. AH is drinking for the 3rd day nonstop, so usually we depend on him for driving, translating etc (we go often to our house, he speaks spanish, handles all the money, drives rentla car because i cant use stick shift) we had been here at least ten t...	Venera	17	486	Dec 31, 2013 by Jerry F
	HP Flying High...Along with MIL (Preview) Funny How things work out... Those that Read my Last thread know that there is more Addiction Rif-Raf goin on in my Family that include my 2 oldest Grandkids! And Because it Happened 4 days before Our Celebrated holiday of Christmas, it brought lots of Tears, Hurt, Pain, to an 8-10 yrs... Well i have bee...	Jozie	10	397	Dec 31, 2013 by grateful2be
	He left!!!! (Preview) So my son left his sober living house!! I just knew it was going to happen.. I want to make it clear!! I do go to alanon.. I do not have a Sponsor that has much time for anyone any more. I will work on finding one.. My only strong face to face meeting is only on Mondays in the evening. I have very little fellowshi...	Gaby	18	579	Dec 30, 2013 by Grace7
	So far... (Preview) Today was a real test for me. I had to ride around with ABF for a couple of hours while he looked for parts at the auto stores in town. I'm sure you all know what that's like:/. I almost lost my cool a few times with his tantrums, rudeness, and the fact that his ADD almost got our borrowed car demolished and us k...	Raven Juniper	2	193	Dec 30, 2013 by neshema2
	grief anniversaries (Preview) This time of year is very difficult for me as it is for many people. But this year all the anniversaries surrounding my son and his death are really throwing me off kilter. Starting in October these 3 months are just one grief after another but December is really hard for me. My son was killed in a really ho...	cwya	7	629	Dec 30, 2013 by hotrod
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.