Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

blessed · blessed

This is a word that means a different things to different people; generally it is spoken of as a bad thing. My A spouse loves to say I am controlling. However, I have thought about this and meditated on it and to be "in control" is not nescesarily a bad thing. Someone has to be. We expect adults t...

leslina · leslina

I've never posted on a message board before so excuse me if this is not the correct way to go about it. I am assuming I just share a little bit of info and go from there but please tell me if this is incorrect. Here's some information about me and my situation: I have been married to an alcoholic for 8 years now...

Quanttrader · Quanttrader

A pal is having his 50th today. It was supposed to be 1-5 by the club pool, then dinner at 6. I went to the club and he had left everybody to go pass out, so everyone was just sitting around talking about him. I figured maybe he would be OK for dinner. So my wife and I get all dressed up, (her in a new outfit I bough...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t57909945/alanon-step-9/

lookingup · lookingup

Daughter and kids are in for a visit,we all decided to take a week in destin Fla.beautiful place,I don't see my a bf but very little he says he is working all the time so he seldom calls and hardly ever answer my calls.i don't understand him anymore I don't know what's going on with him he went from loveing m...

MCALANON · MCALANON

as noted in a post elsewhere on here recently, I'm new to Al Anon having discovered my AS is binge drinking since Nov 2013. I've seen reference to people writing to the A explaining 1 they are loved but 2 all the damage/loss the drinking has caused. I've even seen the odd 'template' online. Does Al Anon...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hey are you OK up there. I heard about the 8.0 Earthquake. Look like it's far from you. Let us know Cathy -- Edited by Cathyinaz on Monday 23rd of June 2014 04:51:01 PM

Mirandac · Mirandac

I have a question about a meeting i attend. One person there always Speaks for 15 minutes and i feel it comes from a place of ego. I get Very impatient with her. She tells her story but in the process is trying To educate us. Does every group have someone like this? She is the Same person that raises h if there...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all, I have not been on for a while although still been attending my face to face meetings. I just wanted to share my good news with you all. 5 weeks ago I got my first Grand child a little girl 6lb 3 Kiera she is beautiful and the first child to be born while we have sobriety in our home. In the dark days I cou...

Gaby · Gaby

Considering all.. It was a great weekend and my daughter was such a beautiful flower girl..

Luiza · Luiza

Hi. Since finding MIP and going to my 1st meeting I have been practicing the 1st step and the slogans and I have been improving so much. On my last thread I explained how H came drunk on Monday and I didn't fight and treated him with silence. He has been baffled since and didn't get drunk on Tuesday and Wedne...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

11 Days and counting .. I am ok, then not, then ok again and then not. I'm kind of laughing at myself .. I used to do the whole he's been gone for xyz days .. LOL .. now I'm on the reverse count down and it's a mixed bag of feelings, facts and number crunching. I guess I am the odd man out on this and I have found I c...

Gaby · Gaby

There are some people in here that regardless how I share what I feel at the moment make me feel low. For one NESHEMA. You make me feel as if I have to things your way. As I read my esh you down talk me. That deeply hurts because here as every one else. As much as you say take what you want and leave the rest.. You ?...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'm having a lot of difficulty with staying on my own side of the street lately. My recovering abf is working through some financial issues and I'm interfering in his life. He shares his financial woes and I then give him unsolicited advice. I'm trying to rescue him from the fallout of poor decision...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

The kids are with their dad and they spent a short time or what I would call a short time with him yesterday. Apparently he is still driving the green car and I do believe there are some hiccups because the kids asked him straight out if he bought it. His answer .. sort of .. how do you sort of buy a car .. wel...

barbaralewis · barbaralewis

if there is, could anyone please post a link to it? thanks!

likemyheart · likemyheart

I just ate a cold cheddar dog for breakfast - I know they aren't good for me, but I ate one anyway. I worked in my yard a bit before it got hot, gotta go clean a neighbors bathrooms because I'm a softie and can't say no; hey I will be old someday and not able to do the physical work involved in cleaning a bathroom...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I know everyone suffers from them but for me, they get way out of control. Like I've never danced in public; if you drag me onto the dance floor I'll just stand there looking at my feet until you let me slink away. If an entertainer calls me out in a crowd I won't reply, I just can't. I'll look at my feet until t...

el-cee · el-cee

I cant concentrate!!!!! I have the concentration of a fish. I have a deadline, the days are counting down to have this work done. I have 3 more days and im up and down, checking on here, tidying up, doing the work then oh wait, il have a cup of tea, il phone such and such. Whaàaaaaa. Procrastination is my spe...

Rusty Angel · Rusty Angel

My daughter is in suicidal despair. It literally breaks my heart. She is threatened with losing her children in a bitter custody battle, long story. I have done everything in my power to support, cheer, guide, cajole, advise her. I know I am powerless, codependent, etc but it is baffling to me...

el-cee · el-cee

JayBird66 · JayBird66

I just sat in on my first online meeting. Only a few people in it, but it was good. I didn't really share, but am hoping the next one I'm more open. I feel like I have such a LONG, HUGE mess that I wouldn't know where to start! Do I tell my story or do I share parts of it? I don't wanna D R A G it out but also need to star...

John · John

Just saw ya'll were on with me and wanted to throw a big hello out to each of you! John

neshema2 · neshema2

well today begins summer....May it bring us more happiness/ health/ abundance in all good things... I am waiting for my dinner to cook and just realized that today is 1st day of summer for us northern hemisphere folks anyway.... My public pool is closed for season...repairs...real bad to lose the se...

watchdog1999 · watchdog1999

There are nights that I literally have to chase my AH around the house. It's more exhausting than chasing my children all day. This man is not only dangerously impulsive when he drinks, but he also tends to walk around after he's fallen asleep (I know, I can't catch a break even when I think he's down for t...

sunshine23 · sunshine23

I used to behave like a dog. Smelling AH, looking at bank account, calling him to encourage him to come home... In the beginning of my disease, I believed him when he said he did not drink. In the middle, I doubted him occasionally, towards the later part, I do not believe any of his words. The interesting...

wornoutmrsfixit · wornoutmrsfixit

I took a little bit of a time out from posting since my thoughts were scattered and I didn't feel I had much to offer while I was so confused but I have been in reading regularly so I have kept up with everyone else's lives. I am feeling more clear-headed these days and I miss talking to everyone so I wanted to...

el-cee · el-cee

My choice was to leave, before alanon mind you. I chose to end our relationship completely about 1 year after joining alanon. I have a friend and she chose to stay to the bitter end, her husband never got sobriety and died at a young age. They lived very seperate lives, it was her and the kids and him on his o...

slowlearner · slowlearner

Whydid I stay with my AH all these years. I don't know. When we first got married I didn't realize that he had a problem with drinking (I grew up in an alcoholic family so alot of the behavior was "normal". Then the kids came along and I didn't want to be alone - though I basically was he was not...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Oh no Ilikemyheart, I heard myself in that post, I would totally be the friend telling you how to build your bloods clotting factor while you bled all over the floor, I laughed so hard at myself when I read that. Its true, oh no, I am just like that! But we are off topic here; you know an unhealthy gut can cau...

Diane Chambers · Diane Chambers

Hi there. I'm a newbie to the board though almost two years in the program. Seeking guidance/suggestions on how to handle a particular situation... I'm a single mom (I'm in my 30s, my kid is a toddler) and am soon to be divorced from my qualifier. I haven't dated anyone since my ex and I split almost tw...

neshema2 · neshema2

Thursday night, my daughter #2 found me a great lawn guy, so i got him to do my yard...great guy, great job, my oldest grandson's uncle , he is... anyway, I call Daughter to thank her profusely for helping me find a yard guy and we chat and she says "I love you mom, i miss you" and i told her th...

Lyne · Lyne

When I was newer to the board, I read from one of you, if you know the answer to a question, why ask it? That is good advice. In a difficult discussion I had with my A last week, I said that I knew she was drinking. She admitted to drinking. I can't tell whether the truth makes it better or worse, but either...

Rusty Angel · Rusty Angel

I get very confused trying to understand love. In the biblical description....love is patient, love is kind etc....it goes on to say "love is not self-seeking"......yet as a codependent I have fallen victim to negating myself, waiting on others only. Al-Anon encourages us to unde...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

I've been cleaning out my old emails and found this message that I sent to my AH a little over three years ago: Dear <<<>>>>,It is clear this disease called alcoholism has taken control of you. You've chosen not to give up drinking for your health, for me, for your daughters, o...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

Hi everyone! For the first time in a long time, I went to the gym twice this week & last night I went to a f2f meeting. I'm still looking for a psychologist. I'm happier than I than I have been. I'm very slowly getting there. Have a fantastic Saturday & Sunday!

Angel19 · Angel19

So my husband has been sober 1 year and 7 months and started drinking non alcoholic beer at the beginning of his recovery and recently one beer at a party. Well, tonight he seems to be back to his old ways. He went to the bar right after work and turned his phone off. What can I do . Should I leave him. I'm so tir...

Gaby · Gaby

I have not heard from my son but people that have seen him do tell me he's around. Today I go to our local county jail website and lord and behold I saw my sons name.. He was pickup this morning for a choice he chose to make and he will possibly look at some time possibly prison. Last night I prayed he would get c...

andromeda · andromeda

So, I have to admit that I have been hyper focused on AH ever since he started attending AA meetings over the last 2 weeks. It's like I'm waiting for some sort of sign to tell me he's safe to talk to again or that I can trust him with certain things again. You know, stuff like my emotions, my feelings, my sou...

StillConfused · StillConfused

Hi everyone, I am not too sure where to begin. I am here because I am concerned about my brother. He got a DUI last Thanksgiving. He disclosed this to me like a week after it happened, I am positive he considered not telling me, even though we are very close. He still hasn't told any of his family members, wh...

sunshine23 · sunshine23

It has been good so far having moved out. AH seems to have longer periods of recovery in between, however, he is still very prideful about being ok whenever I asked him to go AA or help. This week my kids are gone and my AH wanted me to go for a trip with him. Just driving out of town for the weekend. Not sure if I...

Gaby · Gaby

I will be getting my nails and toes did up and taking my daughter with me. We have a wedding to go to tomorrow and I will have fun and enjoy myself and enjoy my time with my husband and daughter. I will for ever keep my son in prayers but I will continue to take care of me. Next weekend another busy Saturday for m...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Although retirement is about 13 days away (yes, I'm counting), I've already begun recreating my life. I signed up for two day a week walks with others my age and two warm water pool classes two nights a week starting next week. Today, I asked one of my current board members who did begin as a program vol...

CelinaR · CelinaR

A month ago, my AH's disease progressed more than I could have imagined. He is a sneaky drinker - never ever drinking in front of me and denying that he is drinking. He was in outpatient treatment over the winter but drank during it so was discharged from the program. He continued to go to AA and insist t...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I went to the doctor and he told me my CT scan was clear. So clear it didn't look like I was a smoker at one time. Now he's confused with my shortness of breath so I'm heading out the door soon to take a Stress Test. What if it hasn't been COPD but a heart condition. Lovely. We will see. I don't like do...

el-cee · el-cee

Due to work committments I have missed my meetings for the last 3 weeks. Ive been feeling a bit fearful in case I revert back to my old miserable self, but im doing not too bad. I can feel a bit of a decline and a bit panicky a couple of times but im getting good at using the tools. Ive been reading each day, conn...

deramam · deramam

I recently married my bf of 6 yrs. He was almost 3 months sober and working the program but it seems like everything that comes out of his mouth is a lie whether he is drinking or not. from dec-April he completed detox, inpatient and outpatient relapse prevention. he relapsed late feb and then again at th...

grateful2be · grateful2be

How many days? Any fun things you're doing as you prepare that you want to share with us? Any fun surprises you've received? Any requests from your MIP family? Looking forward to sharing your joy in some small way if you want to share some of it? If not, I'm still very excited for you. You've worked...

Truth · Truth

I am really excited to start this new chapter. I am ready to move forward and ready to heal. It is going to be a new adventure.

hotrod · hotrod

Share from "BLESSED " a new Member who posted to the Sticky at the top of the Board I transferred it so we could all read and share Thank you. I am new to the program; and just kind of glossed over Steps 1, 2, and 3, which of course I have aced and why I came to AlAnon to start with. However, as I s...

sadsusie · sadsusie

It was almost exactly a year ago today that I left the first time. I was a severely disturbed and depressed woman, scared she would hurt herself or others in the fury of the backlash of alcoholism. Today, I am learning to ask "what do I want?" Not even what's is best for this relationship or fu...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

A quick recap of my situation. My AH and I used to be coworkers. He was fired back in March. People ask me almost on a daily basis if he has a new job yet. They ask about my kids. They know we are separated. They ask about my new apartment. Question after question. How is he making it without a paycheck? Etc etc...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I've been asked about my avatar which I posted as a humble reminder of who the real artist and creator is. The is the back view of a Peacock. The symmetrical beauty of this animal is awe inspiring to me. I've seen them strut and fan their tails and rarely have seen tis view of one like this. I have a pe...

mynewlife · mynewlife

I have not posted since my introduction but I do follow the forum everyday and find great comfort in the support here. I am so grateful to each of you for having the courage to share your journey and I wish that I had the same courage, but thank each of you! After reading another post today that sparked a tri...

PaintItBlack · PaintItBlack

New Here. I just need a place to let loose where no one knows me or my sister. For seven years I've watched her fall into alcohol. It was subtle at first. I noticed she would never talk to me unless it was a crisis. No casual, "how are you?" or "what's new?" or "let's meet up&...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Maybe and maybe not and then there will be more maybe than not because a duck is a duck is a duck. Some of you might remember that part of my journey that included "Pinch and Roodie" the two duck chicks I rescued from my clients hotel who were abandoned by their mom. Well this one isn't named...

LiveLaughLove · LiveLaughLove

I visit this forum very often but don't post very often, but right now I just need to share (okay....vent). I feel like such a sucker. My ex and I broke up over a year ago due to his alcoholism. We have still been in contact and have even, at times, discussed the possibility of us getting back together if h...

elmo7 · elmo7

Hi folks. I'm sure glad I stumbled across this site. I don't know how you determine when enough is enough, but it feels like I'm getting close. My wife left on Sunday to go to the beach with her parents while I stayed at home and kept working. I'm ashamed to say that it has been wonderful having her gone...

lucymae · lucymae

I am helping out a person who was more of an acquaintance but is becoming more of a friend. She has been severely depressed. I have been helping her going on my 7th week. I'm there practically all day, everyday it seems. She is getting help so I don't feel I am enabling her by staying with her and helping her...

Lyne · Lyne

I fooled myself for many years. I thought my spouse cared about me so much that she would get healthy and learn to control her addictions. NOT SO! Not even close. The addictions are her priority and let me learn this please. I cannot compete with them. Alcohol, food, and gambling, are so much more...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Control (Preview) This is a word that means a different things to different people; generally it is spoken of as a bad thing. My A spouse loves to say I am controlling. However, I have thought about this and meditated on it and to be "in control" is not nescesarily a bad thing. Someone has to be. We expect adults t...	blessed	3	527	Jun 24, 2014 by el-cee
	Not sure really what to say... (Preview) I've never posted on a message board before so excuse me if this is not the correct way to go about it. I am assuming I just share a little bit of info and go from there but please tell me if this is incorrect. Here's some information about me and my situation: I have been married to an alcoholic for 8 years now...	leslina	14	562	Jun 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	I just passed on a pals 50th B-Day party, am I wrong? (Preview) A pal is having his 50th today. It was supposed to be 1-5 by the club pool, then dinner at 6. I went to the club and he had left everybody to go pass out, so everyone was just sitting around talking about him. I figured maybe he would be OK for dinner. So my wife and I get all dressed up, (her in a new outfit I bough...	Quanttrader	16	445	Jun 24, 2014 by pinkchip
	STEP 9 (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t57909945/alanon-step-9/	hotrod	0	141	Jun 24, 2014 by hotrod
	On vacation (Preview) Daughter and kids are in for a visit,we all decided to take a week in destin Fla.beautiful place,I don't see my a bf but very little he says he is working all the time so he seldom calls and hardly ever answer my calls.i don't understand him anymore I don't know what's going on with him he went from loveing m...	lookingup	6	514	Jun 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	letter from parents to adult alcoholic son - good idea or not? (Preview) as noted in a post elsewhere on here recently, I'm new to Al Anon having discovered my AS is binge drinking since Nov 2013. I've seen reference to people writing to the A explaining 1 they are loved but 2 all the damage/loss the drinking has caused. I've even seen the odd 'template' online. Does Al Anon...	MCALANON	7	686	Jun 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	OlderGal (Preview) Hey are you OK up there. I heard about the 8.0 Earthquake. Look like it's far from you. Let us know Cathy -- Edited by Cathyinaz on Monday 23rd of June 2014 04:51:01 PM	Cathyinaz	5	229	Jun 23, 2014 by hotrod
	15 minute share (Preview) I have a question about a meeting i attend. One person there always Speaks for 15 minutes and i feel it comes from a place of ego. I get Very impatient with her. She tells her story but in the process is trying To educate us. Does every group have someone like this? She is the Same person that raises h if there...	Mirandac	12	680	Jun 23, 2014 by grateful2be
	Sobriety baby (Preview) Hi all, I have not been on for a while although still been attending my face to face meetings. I just wanted to share my good news with you all. 5 weeks ago I got my first Grand child a little girl 6lb 3 Kiera she is beautiful and the first child to be born while we have sobriety in our home. In the dark days I cou...	Tracy	7	317	Jun 23, 2014 by el-cee
	Great weekend.. (Preview) Considering all.. It was a great weekend and my daughter was such a beautiful flower girl..	Gaby	10	255	Jun 23, 2014 by el-cee
	Is he trying to find an excuse? Too much information...Sorry... (Preview) Hi. Since finding MIP and going to my 1st meeting I have been practicing the 1st step and the slogans and I have been improving so much. On my last thread I explained how H came drunk on Monday and I didn't fight and treated him with silence. He has been baffled since and didn't get drunk on Tuesday and Wedne...	Luiza	29	958	Jun 23, 2014 by Rusty Angel
	11 Days .. (Preview) 11 Days and counting .. I am ok, then not, then ok again and then not. I'm kind of laughing at myself .. I used to do the whole he's been gone for xyz days .. LOL .. now I'm on the reverse count down and it's a mixed bag of feelings, facts and number crunching. I guess I am the odd man out on this and I have found I c...	SerenityRUS	8	482	Jun 22, 2014 by PP
	I will be honest ... ( 1 2 ) (Preview) There are some people in here that regardless how I share what I feel at the moment make me feel low. For one NESHEMA. You make me feel as if I have to things your way. As I read my esh you down talk me. That deeply hurts because here as every one else. As much as you say take what you want and leave the rest.. You ?...	Gaby	47	1322	Jun 22, 2014 by John
	Struggling with an old defect (Preview) I'm having a lot of difficulty with staying on my own side of the street lately. My recovering abf is working through some financial issues and I'm interfering in his life. He shares his financial woes and I then give him unsolicited advice. I'm trying to rescue him from the fallout of poor decision...	tiredtonite	8	428	Jun 22, 2014 by grateful2be
	Very nice day .. (Preview) The kids are with their dad and they spent a short time or what I would call a short time with him yesterday. Apparently he is still driving the green car and I do believe there are some hiccups because the kids asked him straight out if he bought it. His answer .. sort of .. how do you sort of buy a car .. wel...	SerenityRUS	5	316	Jun 22, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	is there an abbreviation list? (Preview) if there is, could anyone please post a link to it? thanks!	barbaralewis	8	2075	Jun 22, 2014 by blessed
	Hotdogs (Preview) I just ate a cold cheddar dog for breakfast - I know they aren't good for me, but I ate one anyway. I worked in my yard a bit before it got hot, gotta go clean a neighbors bathrooms because I'm a softie and can't say no; hey I will be old someday and not able to do the physical work involved in cleaning a bathroom...	likemyheart	7	325	Jun 22, 2014 by el-cee
	Nerves. (Preview) I know everyone suffers from them but for me, they get way out of control. Like I've never danced in public; if you drag me onto the dance floor I'll just stand there looking at my feet until you let me slink away. If an entertainer calls me out in a crowd I won't reply, I just can't. I'll look at my feet until t...	missmeliss	18	496	Jun 22, 2014 by el-cee
	im a goldfish (Preview) I cant concentrate!!!!! I have the concentration of a fish. I have a deadline, the days are counting down to have this work done. I have 3 more days and im up and down, checking on here, tidying up, doing the work then oh wait, il have a cup of tea, il phone such and such. Whaàaaaaa. Procrastination is my spe...	el-cee	10	463	Jun 22, 2014 by el-cee
	how can I be happy when you are in despair? (Preview) My daughter is in suicidal despair. It literally breaks my heart. She is threatened with losing her children in a bitter custody battle, long story. I have done everything in my power to support, cheer, guide, cajole, advise her. I know I am powerless, codependent, etc but it is baffling to me...	Rusty Angel	8	475	Jun 22, 2014 by hotrod
	A Prayer (Preview)	el-cee	6	629	Jun 22, 2014 by hotrod
	MEETING #1 (finally) (Preview) I just sat in on my first online meeting. Only a few people in it, but it was good. I didn't really share, but am hoping the next one I'm more open. I feel like I have such a LONG, HUGE mess that I wouldn't know where to start! Do I tell my story or do I share parts of it? I don't wanna D R A G it out but also need to star...	JayBird66	5	185	Jun 22, 2014 by grateful2be
	pinkchip, SerenityRUS, Cathyinaz, milkwood, ClearTheFog, el-cee, grateful2be, missmeliss, oldergal, yanksfan51 (Preview) Just saw ya'll were on with me and wanted to throw a big hello out to each of you! John	John	13	413	Jun 22, 2014 by grateful2be
	HAPPY 1st DAY OF SUMMER EVERYONE!!!!!! (Preview) well today begins summer....May it bring us more happiness/ health/ abundance in all good things... I am waiting for my dinner to cook and just realized that today is 1st day of summer for us northern hemisphere folks anyway.... My public pool is closed for season...repairs...real bad to lose the se...	neshema2	6	313	Jun 22, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	When you're chasing the A more than your kids.... (Preview) There are nights that I literally have to chase my AH around the house. It's more exhausting than chasing my children all day. This man is not only dangerously impulsive when he drinks, but he also tends to walk around after he's fallen asleep (I know, I can't catch a break even when I think he's down for t...	watchdog1999	9	396	Jun 22, 2014 by sunshine23
	OCD (Preview) I used to behave like a dog. Smelling AH, looking at bank account, calling him to encourage him to come home... In the beginning of my disease, I believed him when he said he did not drink. In the middle, I doubted him occasionally, towards the later part, I do not believe any of his words. The interesting...	sunshine23	4	774	Jun 22, 2014 by el-cee
	Recovery Is Confusing, Hard & Wonderful (Preview) I took a little bit of a time out from posting since my thoughts were scattered and I didn't feel I had much to offer while I was so confused but I have been in reading regularly so I have kept up with everyone else's lives. I am feeling more clear-headed these days and I miss talking to everyone so I wanted to...	wornoutmrsfixit	13	1428	Jun 22, 2014 by wornoutmrsfixit
	choosing to stay or go (Preview) My choice was to leave, before alanon mind you. I chose to end our relationship completely about 1 year after joining alanon. I have a friend and she chose to stay to the bitter end, her husband never got sobriety and died at a young age. They lived very seperate lives, it was her and the kids and him on his o...	el-cee	25	662	Jun 21, 2014 by Jerry F
	Years wasted???? (Preview) Whydid I stay with my AH all these years. I don't know. When we first got married I didn't realize that he had a problem with drinking (I grew up in an alcoholic family so alot of the behavior was "normal". Then the kids came along and I didn't want to be alone - though I basically was he was not...	slowlearner	9	536	Jun 21, 2014 by andromeda
	@ Ilikemyheart (Preview) Oh no Ilikemyheart, I heard myself in that post, I would totally be the friend telling you how to build your bloods clotting factor while you bled all over the floor, I laughed so hard at myself when I read that. Its true, oh no, I am just like that! But we are off topic here; you know an unhealthy gut can cau...	missmeliss	12	396	Jun 21, 2014 by likemyheart
	Dating another member in the Al-Anon program (Preview) Hi there. I'm a newbie to the board though almost two years in the program. Seeking guidance/suggestions on how to handle a particular situation... I'm a single mom (I'm in my 30s, my kid is a toddler) and am soon to be divorced from my qualifier. I haven't dated anyone since my ex and I split almost tw...	Diane Chambers	7	987	Jun 21, 2014 by Debilyn
	Wish me luck, you all (Preview) Thursday night, my daughter #2 found me a great lawn guy, so i got him to do my yard...great guy, great job, my oldest grandson's uncle , he is... anyway, I call Daughter to thank her profusely for helping me find a yard guy and we chat and she says "I love you mom, i miss you" and i told her th...	neshema2	10	320	Jun 21, 2014 by neshema2
	hard truth (Preview) When I was newer to the board, I read from one of you, if you know the answer to a question, why ask it? That is good advice. In a difficult discussion I had with my A last week, I said that I knew she was drinking. She admitted to drinking. I can't tell whether the truth makes it better or worse, but either...	Lyne	3	208	Jun 21, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	pity vs love (Preview) I get very confused trying to understand love. In the biblical description....love is patient, love is kind etc....it goes on to say "love is not self-seeking"......yet as a codependent I have fallen victim to negating myself, waiting on others only. Al-Anon encourages us to unde...	Rusty Angel	13	1260	Jun 21, 2014 by missmeliss
	Revisiting Old Emails (Preview) I've been cleaning out my old emails and found this message that I sent to my AH a little over three years ago: Dear <<<>>>>,It is clear this disease called alcoholism has taken control of you. You've chosen not to give up drinking for your health, for me, for your daughters, o...	Green Eyes	7	380	Jun 21, 2014 by yanksfan51
	Taking care of me (Preview) Hi everyone! For the first time in a long time, I went to the gym twice this week & last night I went to a f2f meeting. I'm still looking for a psychologist. I'm happier than I than I have been. I'm very slowly getting there. Have a fantastic Saturday & Sunday!	phoenixmagicgirl	2	170	Jun 21, 2014 by grateful2be
	He slowly went back to his old ways. What do I do now?! (Preview) So my husband has been sober 1 year and 7 months and started drinking non alcoholic beer at the beginning of his recovery and recently one beer at a party. Well, tonight he seems to be back to his old ways. He went to the bar right after work and turned his phone off. What can I do . Should I leave him. I'm so tir...	Angel19	5	394	Jun 21, 2014 by yanksfan51
	My son in jail.. (Preview) I have not heard from my son but people that have seen him do tell me he's around. Today I go to our local county jail website and lord and behold I saw my sons name.. He was pickup this morning for a choice he chose to make and he will possibly look at some time possibly prison. Last night I prayed he would get c...	Gaby	10	495	Jun 20, 2014 by Andrea12
	Help me with new recovery (Preview) So, I have to admit that I have been hyper focused on AH ever since he started attending AA meetings over the last 2 weeks. It's like I'm waiting for some sort of sign to tell me he's safe to talk to again or that I can trust him with certain things again. You know, stuff like my emotions, my feelings, my sou...	andromeda	14	513	Jun 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	My brother, drinking problem, but what if I am wrong? (Preview) Hi everyone, I am not too sure where to begin. I am here because I am concerned about my brother. He got a DUI last Thanksgiving. He disclosed this to me like a week after it happened, I am positive he considered not telling me, even though we are very close. He still hasn't told any of his family members, wh...	StillConfused	8	386	Jun 20, 2014 by neshema2
	Should I or shouldn't I? (Preview) It has been good so far having moved out. AH seems to have longer periods of recovery in between, however, he is still very prideful about being ok whenever I asked him to go AA or help. This week my kids are gone and my AH wanted me to go for a trip with him. Just driving out of town for the weekend. Not sure if I...	sunshine23	8	447	Jun 20, 2014 by Lyne
	Today... (Preview) I will be getting my nails and toes did up and taking my daughter with me. We have a wedding to go to tomorrow and I will have fun and enjoy myself and enjoy my time with my husband and daughter. I will for ever keep my son in prayers but I will continue to take care of me. Next weekend another busy Saturday for m...	Gaby	9	374	Jun 20, 2014 by neshema2
	Creating life anew (Preview) Although retirement is about 13 days away (yes, I'm counting), I've already begun recreating my life. I signed up for two day a week walks with others my age and two warm water pool classes two nights a week starting next week. Today, I asked one of my current board members who did begin as a program vol...	grateful2be	18	560	Jun 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	Overwhelmed (Preview) A month ago, my AH's disease progressed more than I could have imagined. He is a sneaky drinker - never ever drinking in front of me and denying that he is drinking. He was in outpatient treatment over the winter but drank during it so was discharged from the program. He continued to go to AA and insist t...	CelinaR	5	289	Jun 20, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	CT Scan (Preview) I went to the doctor and he told me my CT scan was clear. So clear it didn't look like I was a smoker at one time. Now he's confused with my shortness of breath so I'm heading out the door soon to take a Stress Test. What if it hasn't been COPD but a heart condition. Lovely. We will see. I don't like do...	Cathyinaz	7	215	Jun 20, 2014 by Debilyn
	missing meetings (Preview) Due to work committments I have missed my meetings for the last 3 weeks. Ive been feeling a bit fearful in case I revert back to my old miserable self, but im doing not too bad. I can feel a bit of a decline and a bit panicky a couple of times but im getting good at using the tools. Ive been reading each day, conn...	el-cee	3	452	Jun 20, 2014 by neshema2
	Everything is a lie... AH (Preview) I recently married my bf of 6 yrs. He was almost 3 months sober and working the program but it seems like everything that comes out of his mouth is a lie whether he is drinking or not. from dec-April he completed detox, inpatient and outpatient relapse prevention. he relapsed late feb and then again at th...	deramam	17	9090	Jun 20, 2014 by Beatrice
	Pinkchip! (Preview) How many days? Any fun things you're doing as you prepare that you want to share with us? Any fun surprises you've received? Any requests from your MIP family? Looking forward to sharing your joy in some small way if you want to share some of it? If not, I'm still very excited for you. You've worked...	grateful2be	13	773	Jun 20, 2014 by el-cee
	My new life... (Preview) I am really excited to start this new chapter. I am ready to move forward and ready to heal. It is going to be a new adventure.	Truth	3	232	Jun 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	First step share (Preview) Share from "BLESSED " a new Member who posted to the Sticky at the top of the Board I transferred it so we could all read and share Thank you. I am new to the program; and just kind of glossed over Steps 1, 2, and 3, which of course I have aced and why I came to AlAnon to start with. However, as I s...	hotrod	6	347	Jun 20, 2014 by PP
	Wanted to share that I finally left (Preview) It was almost exactly a year ago today that I left the first time. I was a severely disturbed and depressed woman, scared she would hurt herself or others in the fury of the backlash of alcoholism. Today, I am learning to ask "what do I want?" Not even what's is best for this relationship or fu...	sadsusie	14	579	Jun 20, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Why do I feel like I have to answer their questions??? (Preview) A quick recap of my situation. My AH and I used to be coworkers. He was fired back in March. People ask me almost on a daily basis if he has a new job yet. They ask about my kids. They know we are separated. They ask about my new apartment. Question after question. How is he making it without a paycheck? Etc etc...	Newlife girl	15	576	Jun 20, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	The Avatar (Preview) I've been asked about my avatar which I posted as a humble reminder of who the real artist and creator is. The is the back view of a Peacock. The symmetrical beauty of this animal is awe inspiring to me. I've seen them strut and fan their tails and rarely have seen tis view of one like this. I have a pe...	Jerry F	9	367	Jun 20, 2014 by Jerry F
	I don't understand..... (Preview) I have not posted since my introduction but I do follow the forum everyday and find great comfort in the support here. I am so grateful to each of you for having the courage to share your journey and I wish that I had the same courage, but thank each of you! After reading another post today that sparked a tri...	mynewlife	4	445	Jun 20, 2014 by Katy
	New Here: How can I mourn her when she is still alive? (Preview) New Here. I just need a place to let loose where no one knows me or my sister. For seven years I've watched her fall into alcohol. It was subtle at first. I noticed she would never talk to me unless it was a crisis. No casual, "how are you?" or "what's new?" or "let's meet up&...	PaintItBlack	19	1299	Jun 19, 2014 by Jerry F
	A Rerun? (Preview) Maybe and maybe not and then there will be more maybe than not because a duck is a duck is a duck. Some of you might remember that part of my journey that included "Pinch and Roodie" the two duck chicks I rescued from my clients hotel who were abandoned by their mom. Well this one isn't named...	Jerry F	21	565	Jun 19, 2014 by Path to Serenity
	Today, I made my decision to move on (Preview) I visit this forum very often but don't post very often, but right now I just need to share (okay....vent). I feel like such a sucker. My ex and I broke up over a year ago due to his alcoholism. We have still been in contact and have even, at times, discussed the possibility of us getting back together if h...	LiveLaughLove	16	676	Jun 19, 2014 by LiveLaughLove
	scared new guy (Preview) Hi folks. I'm sure glad I stumbled across this site. I don't know how you determine when enough is enough, but it feels like I'm getting close. My wife left on Sunday to go to the beach with her parents while I stayed at home and kept working. I'm ashamed to say that it has been wonderful having her gone...	elmo7	10	404	Jun 19, 2014 by maryjane
	Charging money for helping someone who is depressed (Preview) I am helping out a person who was more of an acquaintance but is becoming more of a friend. She has been severely depressed. I have been helping her going on my 7th week. I'm there practically all day, everyday it seems. She is getting help so I don't feel I am enabling her by staying with her and helping her...	lucymae	17	425	Jun 19, 2014 by Debilyn
	Lesson in humility (Preview) I fooled myself for many years. I thought my spouse cared about me so much that she would get healthy and learn to control her addictions. NOT SO! Not even close. The addictions are her priority and let me learn this please. I cannot compete with them. Alcohol, food, and gambling, are so much more...	Lyne	10	468	Jun 19, 2014 by neshema2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.