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Keep looking at the trees
(Preview)
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Cathyinaz
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10
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780
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NO I won't wait!
(Preview)
"Well you'll have to wait and we'll discuss this next week!" ""NO." "No I won't wait!!!" Sheesh! There it is- I thought I had a voice!!!! Dear family, he who cares less wins; although this is much more than that. I finally care about me more and it's time to tak...
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bud
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20
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642
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Is it my problem or his?
(Preview)
This is my first post on here, so forgive me if it's lengthy. I am having issues with my husband and his drinking. Which is weird for me to say because it used to actually be WAY worse. But through years of us talking and trying to work on it, he has gotten a lot better. But when he does drink, he always takes it...
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Jordan
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6
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629
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My son has tried to commit suicide.
(Preview)
Hello, This is the first time i've been on this forum. My 41 year old son has tried to commit suicide and i don't know what to do. I'm so scared of saying or doing the wrong thing. He's been sober for the last 2 years, but hasn't really changed anything else in his life, he's just stopped drinking, but his beh...
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EdwinaGrace
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8
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815
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Aquamom and LC
(Preview)
Holding warm, positive thoughts of you both today Let us know how you are doing. "God Grant me Serenity "
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hotrod
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6
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371
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Financial bind
(Preview)
Since my AH has started doing the bills and inspecting the checking account with a fine tooth comb, he's come down on me hard and on my spending. I tried to point out that he's had access to all the accounts all this time but instead blamed me just because I was in charge. Now, what really ticks me off is th...
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andromeda
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10
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611
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My New Job Starts on Monday!
(Preview)
I feel so blessed tonight. After years of Hell and dysfunction, in both my personal and career life, I feel like I'm finally moving towards where my HP feels I should be. I left my current, and crazy, job today and I start my new job on Monday- and my new boss is awesome (so far!)!!! Very thankful right now...
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Green Eyes
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6
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449
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What about therapy for depression?
(Preview)
So now my s/o is having bad stomach pains. We've been going through this with every hypertension med. Each one works for a while, then he gets bad stomach pains, and he has to find something else. It was noticeable enough yesterday morning that the people at court noticed, passed the word around, an...
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zebrafish
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14
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756
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Falling out of love with an addict
(Preview)
I feel as if I have lost my love for my 21 year old son due to his drug an alcohol use, and that surprises me because I have always felt my power to love was greater than most, yet here I am. I try to be the supportive dad but I am at the point where I just don't like him very much. It makes me feel like such a failu...
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Cooper
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15
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805
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things can change overnight sometimes...
(Preview)
I guess when I voice how I feel sometimes it seems to change. I am starting to really stand up for myself. I don't feel intimidated by my AH. He is not the enemy. I can cope w/ whatever I have to. Since my mom has not been released from the hospital yet, I am very concerned. I have a lot of things that went wrong t...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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291
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another post...my cousin!
(Preview)
I will make this quick. I feel terrible about sending messages to my 2nd cousin who just PMed me about her mother not wanting to talk on the phone just by email or by letter. To be honest, I am kind of angry but feel guilty about caring & making mistakes w/ dealing w/ her now. She is very ill & all I wan...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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343
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time for more changes
(Preview)
I had a session with my therapist yesterday and I said I feel like a ghost floating around alone.I didn't realize it until the session,that is why I go to therapy,things come out in the sessions that I can't make a connection with but my therapist helps me put the puzzle together.I am an only child who gre...
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mjferg
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3
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373
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detachment question
(Preview)
I have never gotten a comfortable understanding of detachment, and have struggled with it. My AD is in the hospital, having had gotten herself into a horrible position with someone. She is verbally abusive to me and said some cruel things this last go around. Now she calls and needs clothes, shamp...
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akk
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21
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732
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Sick and Tired of being Sick and Tired
(Preview)
It seems that every pay day AH doesn't come home, whether or not his family needs anything.. It is just getting worse and worse. He will leave me with next to nothing to get through the next week only for him to do it again. I don't no what to do, nothing I say gets through to him.. Just looking to talk..
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FedUp
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12
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809
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Learn to apprecicate what you HAVE , B4 time forces U to appreciate what you HAD
(Preview)
I am facing this now with an adopted sister now in hospice care due to Alzheimer's....Her daughter, my niece, texted me w/this sad update today...Its hard to accept that my big sis and mentor is now in this sad condition....However, I am so glad I always treated her with love , respect and i kept up with...
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neshema2
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11
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573
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giving our power away
(Preview)
I've been noticing over the last few months how unhealthy songs are. (lol I know). I guess its the whole early recovery thing where like a child learning the alphabet, you see examples everywhere. I watched Selena Gomez heart wants what it wants and cringed for the poor girl.shes so young!!! And strik...
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aquamom23
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22
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711
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boy, it sure kept hanging on...
(Preview)
I regretfully feel like crap about not being able to post on the mobile site. I don't have access to post on my cell phone at home. And, because I have been sick, I haven't been able to get to the library to get on this computer. I feel like I am missing something & feel left out. I have been wanting to get o...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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535
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Message from my wife from rehab
(Preview)
My wife's stay in rehab is coming to a close. I have had very little communication with her during her time there. She also has had very little communication with me or our three kids. Tonight I received an email from her that says that her counselors feel that our home is an unhealthy environment to r...
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MooseWork
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11
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771
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What does a sponsor do?
(Preview)
I've been reading a lot of things on this site, but perhaps I've missed it. What does a sponsor do? Not only for Al-Anon, but I'm also curious for AA.
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frustrationshigh
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4
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835
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What a rough day
(Preview)
Yesterday was a pretty rough day for everyone involved in my family's lives. My AW had an even worse day than normal (instead of 1 or 2 bottles of wine, she had 4) and just went bonkers on everyone. My phone was blowing up with calls/texts from my in-laws yesterday. I got the onslaught when I got home. ...
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frustrationshigh
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10
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600
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Temp Sponsor
(Preview)
Hi, I am looking for a Temp Sponsor or Sponsor. My present Sponsor has decided to not attend meetings any longer. I have been in the program a while - about 15 years. I am self employed and work with my A husband who is sober without a program-quite a challenge at times. As it says in our opening in Al Anon -...
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Peace59
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0
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289
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Courage to Change
(Preview)
December 10th, page 345. I have always loved this powerful courageous page in our daily reader. It says it powerfully to me even down to Henry W Lf's note. Give it a read and hope you have the publication. (((((MIP)))))
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Jerry F
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7
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798
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A peaceful little christmas
(Preview)
I went out yesterday and picked up some gifts for my daughter yesterday,it isn't much but it is all I can do right now.I got the tree today,I love the smell of a real tree,they were marked down.It's beautiful.You know right now I just have a heart full of gratitude,I wish I could put into words how much thi...
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mjferg
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5
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505
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Just plain old irritable
(Preview)
K well after my well intentioned listening ....I had another phone call from my friend...I have no idea if we will be friends anymore. I tried to listen for over 45 minutes while she talked, i tried to speak I got interrupted, so I waited, then I tried to talk and she started talking to people in the backgr...
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Truth
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19
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561
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Another ruined week-end
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
I know that the drinking makes AH unreasonable and abusive, but it always is upsetting. I parked the car, when I came home from work in a different spot so the tree full of pigeons would not make a mess all over it and I forgot to turn the porch light on for him and he came in raging and moved the car and scream...
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Debb
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58
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1319
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Will ABC stores confirm suspicions?
(Preview)
Hi there. First post, so please go easy on me. I hope I'm doing this right, and that I'm in the right place. If not, forgive me. I'm in a rough spot, in that I don't know what direction to take my life. I've been involved with an alcoholic girlfriend now for 6 months. She was an alcoholic before we star...
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BruceKent
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27
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829
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Blah blah moan moan
(Preview)
Avatar is me this morning. I woke up in a bad mood. I went walking on the beach because I figured if that didn't cheer me up nothing would. It worked. My day was mostly good after that. Things here are very hard. The son who's room I am renting has come back and is sleeping on the couch. Housemate lady has been...
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missmeliss
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20
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824
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Struggling to cope with recovering AH
(Preview)
Hi everyone my name is Tanya and this is my first introduction to Al anon community. I've been married to my AH for 6 years now and it's been a very trying WTF time! he has been in and out of rehab but this last time there seems to be considerable improvement. He's been sober for nearly 3 months now and it's G...
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Teepee85
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36
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842
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Newbie.
(Preview)
OK trying to keep this short, hubby and I have been together 11 years and over that time his drinking has got worse! Since June when his brother with a few spare bedrooms moved closer it got even worse! My husband is kind, loving, and generous when hes not drinking when he is nothing else matters! since Ju...
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tiredmummy
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8
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575
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Getting them Sober
(Preview)
There used to be a book on here that was a "sticky" at the top of the page. I think it was called "Getting them Sober" does anyone know anything about that? Thanks in advance.
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Overcome
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9
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665
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Guess I grew up more
(Preview)
hi all, I have shared I am a sucker. Bad at staying all business when it comes to being a landlord. So again, ad says,"Desperate for pasture for horses." I invite her to bring them over. set an amount and expectations. omg one of the rescues is a houdini horse. shilo. I called him Bozo as I swear...
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Debilyn
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6
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674
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WEDNESDAY AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM (EST)
(Preview)
WEDNESDAY AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM (EST) TOPICS: Grieving, Fear, Trust The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the server we use is irc.chat4all.org, port 6667 which us...
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shimo
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0
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194
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learning to know when its time to get help
(Preview)
THis isn't alanon, but it is a facet of my recovery... I have had this latest back spasm problem for about 2.5 weeks now.....i would feel hope/progress then sunday BANG...i did something to aggravate it and was unable to walk w/out great difficulty and very slowly this am I drug me to my doc b/c i could n...
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neshema2
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17
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614
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new to al-anon
(Preview)
i have spent my adult life surrounded by addicts, recreationally using myself, but have never been involved in AA or Al-anon. Last week i put my foot down with my boyfriend (of only 4 or 6 months; have known each other for about a year). I knew the substances that bonded us would drive us apart, and of co...
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anna_m
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12
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606
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This is absolutely not al-anon BUT
(Preview)
I hope you guys will allow it!! This house doesn't have a letter-box. I enjoy many aspects of the lifestyle here but there are some things lacking such as an oven, clothesline and, a letterbox and the post-man tends to throw the letters on the ground with angry writing "why don't you have a letterb...
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missmeliss
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4
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652
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Another lesson in control!
(Preview)
I have been watching a series on King Henry the 8th, I enjoy history and stories about real people.As I was watching I realized what a brute this man was and what a big ego he had.He desired a son to reign when he died,A girl would not be competent, and he went through 6 wives and had one son .He spent years of h...
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mjferg
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3
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362
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The Gain
(Preview)
I've made no secret of the fact that life is hard lately and I am really fed up with it and prone to feeling sorry for myself and then beating myself up for feeling sorry for myself...lol woe is me. But having watched the way life unfolds and the way things happen all by themselves, I have no doubt that it all...
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missmeliss
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4
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485
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being a member of alanon....
(Preview)
Means to me that I have a responsibility to pass on what I have been given. Its a fellowship of equals so people give and get. How have you, or do you pass it on? And what do you get in return? Has it ever went wrong? -- Edited by el-cee on Saturday 6th of December 2014 06:41:31 AM
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el-cee
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29
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774
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Christmas, gift giving and Alanon recovery
(Preview)
When I reached puberty, my Mom and Dad had a host of little people to care for and to raise. My Mom, an untreated ACOA, was driven by the need to do everything perfectly. Our Christmases looked like they had been put together by a large team of elves and our house looked like something out of Good Houseke...
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grateful2be
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27
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913
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need to let this go!
(Preview)
I am upset today!My ex called my teenage daughter last night,it was late and she didn't realize it was him calling.I was in bed when she came and told me.I changed my phone number but I wasn't even thinking about her phone at the time,I have had so much on my plate.It really makes me angry that he had the ner...
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mjferg
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17
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712
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S/O snapped at me....
(Preview)
So today he mentioned that he had to take the checks and go to the bank, and I said something like "I'm not doing it," and he snapped "I know." So I don't know if he just didn't like being reminded, or if he's mad that I'm not doing it any more. I have a lot to learn yet. I guess a lot of p...
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zebrafish
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6
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726
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Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice...shame on me
(Preview)
i just watched my empathy be flushed down the alcoholic toilet of hell. Sorry...but I am at my wits end. The other night AH was being open and honest..so I thought. In the last few days since then, he has turned his attitude around...kinda like the Exorcist scene where what's her name twists her head all...
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Newlife girl
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8
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782
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A Good Word For Today
(Preview)
Become an I dont know it all. Whenever you find yourself getting anxious about the big and small deaths of daily lifebeing out of control, not getting what you want, endings and partingstake a few minutes to allow in the possibility that you do not see the full picture. Often what looks terrible today w...
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LinSC
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7
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480
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Filing for bankruptcy and need ESH
(Preview)
Since leaving my exAH I left with a ton of credit card debt from the both of us. For the last few years I have been able to make payments and carry on per usual, but since my 16 year old started driving that is another expense her car, gas, insurance and my old car died so now I have a car payment and my car insura...
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Breakingfree
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13
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749
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Open AA Metting Book
(Preview)
Someone had asked me for the title of the book my home group in AA is reading. I'm so glad to be going back to these meetings it just really reminds me how far I have to go. Drop the Rock Removing Character Defects Steps Six and Seven All I can say is WOW .. this book for me has put a few things into perspectiv...
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SerenityRUS
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2
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324
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Some Thoughts on Time Flys
(Preview)
My son has been sober for a year now. But that doesnt say a whole lot because he doesnt have a program so is growing very slow as far as picking up new habits and characteristics. As for me I have just been glad I have not had to deal with him. I now realize how exhausted I was after all those years of trying to &q...
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LinSC
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3
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492
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Is there any hope?
(Preview)
My AH just went into rehab on Monday after we had a huge fight and I kicked him out of the house. He said so many mean things over the weekend and then by Sunday and Monday came back to his senses and decided he really did need help. I just don't know if I am fooling myself thinking that well if he really stays so...
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Helpangel
|
9
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768
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|
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THE "WHAT IF'S"
(Preview)
Because of the what if's that I am experiencing this Christmas season, because of my son's past drinking. I hesitate to go visit him and family. Although he has been sober for over a year, does not have a program and has not grown a lot in his problem solving capabilities. But I want to see my Grand baby! He...
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LinSC
|
9
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736
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All of a sudden
(Preview)
So, all of a sudden AH is worried about the finances. Claims his job is on the line, that we will be out of savings by the spring, that he just has to find a way to figure this whole mess out.....Of course, I've been managing the finances for the past few years so there's a lot of guilt in my head right now abou...
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andromeda
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26
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945
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Holiday Stress
(Preview)
Well the Holidays are here again. And so is the stress for me. When I was growing up my mother loved Christmas and my father spoiled just about everyone by being drunk and passed out somewhere. Now I have continued the cycle by marrying an alcoholic and trying to make the holidays perfect for the kids...
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slowlearner
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8
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823
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who is it hardest on?
(Preview)
Hi folks, I'm new here. I am an adult child of an alcoholic father. He has been gone a very long time now. My partner's sister and her husband were also alcoholics. They had 2 kids, who are 13 years apart. I am very close to both boys. The older child was about 12 when his parents' drinking got completely out...
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Cloudchaser
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15
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803
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Help needed for loss, please!
(Preview)
My ill Mom was placed in hospice today and I'm so overwhelmed and flooded with emotions. It seems like a long, drawn out process and yet things are moving way too quickly and there is no way to prepare for loss and all that goes with it. No matter how many times I revisit, it will be life on life's terms bu...
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bud
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25
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827
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STEP 9
(Preview)
Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 9 has been posted to the Step Board Please share your ESH if you like.Here is the web site addy http://stepwork.a...
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hotrod
|
0
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358
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|
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trying to get from this to that
(Preview)
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el-cee
|
7
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376
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still here, gleaning from ya'lls posts...
(Preview)
Hi! things have been so crazy busy here but I am able to come and read every once in a while and it always seems to be what I need to hear! I am so thankful for ya'll and this board. I have not been working my program lately because I am as stubborn and in denial as my AH and let's face it, it's way easier to backsli...
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Fairlee
|
5
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579
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|
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Feeling empathy
(Preview)
I am realizing more and more each day how sick my husband is and I have more empathy for him than I used to. Living apart from him has really opened my eyes. He is incapable of working. He is in denial about our home foreclosing. I spoke to him tonight and just told him I understand. I have complained a lot to o...
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Newlife girl
|
8
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543
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Thought I should check to see if the stove was still hot.
(Preview)
Daughter went away to her dad's over the weekend. I decided, this time, maybe it would be good if I drove some of the way (I still haven't ventured far from home) then parked, caught the train the rest of the way, back to my car and drive home again. Great idea huh? Remember, it's about 8-9 hours on public tr...
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missmeliss
|
17
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804
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What are these "slips" you speak of?
(Preview)
Now I am old school Al Anon, AA. A slip was no such thing. You did a drug, you relapsed and your days start all over again. Even if you had ten years in, you were at day one. I consider a slip a step on the road to total relapse. Would like to hear from others . please? pinkchip? Other double winners? everyone?...
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Debilyn
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16
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1315
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Want to learn how to stop enabling
(Preview)
Hi all, My situation is difficult, because my significant other and I are having to work together to stay afloat financially, but he's not doing his share. He's addicted to the internet, really really addicted. He was forced to semi-retire June 2013, but still works freelance. His pension is basi...
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zebrafish
|
15
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803
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|
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Boy am I angry!
(Preview)
It hit last night,I was washing dishes,I started slamming the dishes and I started crying,I have been feeling a lot of things,really painful things and I have to say I deserve better than this crap!All of a sudden I realize I have believed the lies I learned from my father.He was horrible to me,he treat...
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mjferg
|
11
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672
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