Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

maresie2 · maresie2

I remember first coming to this board nearly 3 years ago and reading of people leaving their A's and I remember feeling that would never be me. I felt so sure I could find a way to make it work. Now all that seems impossible. I see more and more how impossible the A's attitude, lies, acting out, lack of limit...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I am ready to start working the steps. I have a wonderful person to be my sponsor, however she hasn't been active in AL-Anon for about 15 yrs, so she is not really sure how we go about it. Is there a specific way or a written guide? Any guidance would be greatly appreciated. Thanks, Lou

muppet · muppet

My partner is an alcoholic who attends his meetings. Al Anon has adviced me to part from him. Two months ago he came home and beat me up. I have 2 broken ribs. He has since moved out and we see each other. He said that he only now wants a friendship as he needs to recover and is confused. We meet regularly and he...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family))))), Just wanted to wish you all a wonderful, happy weekend. I was given off this weekend (Fri-Sun) and we decided to make it an official Pipers Kitty weekend! Okay, I can see all the new faces saying "What the heck is this crazy woman talking about?" Several years ago I did a...

belle1 · belle1

trial

tea2 · tea2

My favorite page (if I had to pick only one) is 109 (April 18) in the Courage To Change daily reader. It reminds me where to place the focus, it tells that no one can be responsible for my happiness but myself. If I am unhappy what can I do about it, how can I be a more content person with others when I am disappo...

janey225 · janey225

Hello All Well my AH has been back home for about 10 days. Things are going good so far. Today will be his 2 week mark of Sobriety. He has had stretches of anywhere of 3 days to 10 days with out a drink so this is a milestone. I thought once he gets sober it will all be ok again. He is a completly different person...

marmare · marmare

You guys are the best.....when I find myself upset I immediatly think of all of you and know things will be okay because of the love and support I have here. I went and had my mamogram yesterday and now am totally freaking myself out. The imaging clinic called, they found something in one of my breasts...

pabell · pabell

I'm venting my frustations, anxieties, fears, and concerns. I would love any feedback anyone has, both good and bad.... My son is 16, he will be 17 very soon. As I have posted previously, up until this year, at least to my knowledge, he's been a good kid. Good grades, great in sports, active in sc...

lmw · lmw

know, we dont offer advice.. but what do you think you would do or have you done in a similar situation? Last fall, I took the kids and left my AH the day he came home from rehab. I filed for divorce the same day. He relapsed repeatedly, going back into rehab again, until he totaled his car and was arreste...

DJ · DJ

In August of 2005, I went to one al-anon meeting. I didn't get it... I didn't return. My husband had gone into a rehab program for one week... he relapsed. He went into a second rehab program in April of 06... he reached his one year of sobriety this past April. Lately, I've been angrier than ever. I'm no...

ditto · ditto

For the past 7 years I have known that I no longer want to live here. I have been researching moving across the country to Austin, TX. I will not know anyone there. I will not have a job there. I am terrified. But, where I live now has not been good to me or for me. So, it is time to take the plunge. Today I m...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((Everyone)))))) Finally got my internet connection fixed. Whew, what a mess. So my son is off for the summer and was up at work with me today. He and a friend had planned on meeting up and playing basketball at a local rec center they have memberships to. I heard my son tell his friend that he "...

annmarie · annmarie

When I was with my Abf we had some nasty arguments. Towards the end we seemed to fight all the time. We were as bad as each other. Except I even lashed out a couple of times. I am so, so guilty about this. As we are now distanced I am realising how sick he is, and how sick I was myself. I am getting slowly better no...

cwds35473 · cwds35473

I am new to all of this. Just wondering around on the net and found this site. I am wondering if my husband is an alcoholic - of course, he says he isn't. He drinks at least a 12 pack 5 to 6 nights a week. He drinks by himself. I ask for the weekends to be "family" oriented and he usually complie...

souljoy · souljoy

For me, the hardest part of having an AH is when he goes on binges and starts a conversation and sucks me into his craziness. For a while know I have been successfully detached. last night he got the best of me and now I am an exhausted bundle of nerves today. I keep telling myself to focus on taking car of m...

annmarie · annmarie

I am interested in learning more about alcoholism and sugar addiction. I consider myself to be addicted to sugar, and worry that if I were to drink I could easily develop an addiction to alcohol, given that its likely to be in the genes and environment. I seem to turn to sugar easily to comfort myself, a...

QOD · QOD

Well, I made it to my Martial Arts belt testing Saturday. My daughter and I are now official Green Belts. My son is already a Red Belt. AND on top of that, we were awarded the "Family of the Month" award. So as exhausting as the entire day was, it was very uplifting. :) Sincerely, QOD

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

My AH was strangely missing from the house. His car was here, and everything was right where he left it. I tried to just go about my business, but I couldn't keep my mind from wandering. Finally I saw him get a beer from the trunk of the car and walk down the sidewalk. Curiosity got the better of me and I found...

tryingtoheal · tryingtoheal

I'm divorcing AH, also found out he was cheating and lying - alot. We have a 19 year old son away at college and a 15 year old son at home. AH is living in an apt in town. People are starting to find out about the divorce. They think he is the worlds nicest guy and are asking why. I've told only a very few close fri...

debilyn · debilyn

see my AH. I just want to look at him while he is still alive. Maybe hear his voice. See if he is there at all. what makes me feel this, what do i want? can't help it. I loved my husband very much. sometimes the horribleness of it hits me and i cannot believe where we are now. My Al Anon knowledge scared him. He co...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Just a thought, seems kind of ironic that America was formed but a bunch of 30 and 40 (my age) year olds who were tired of people telling them what to do...and look what we have become...Somtimes I think we have become so civilized we're starting to regress..

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

The other day I posted a link as a reply on a thread and it talked about the ineffectiveness of AA but the thing I found most interesting in the article was the statement that about 5% of alcoholics have spontaneous remission every year. So basically they just quit with no help and are "better&quo...

Denoraphy · Denoraphy

Last night my daughter made her confirmation. She chose her stepsister who is 23 to be her sponsor. We were to meet at the church at 7pm, a half hour before the ceremony was to start. My daughter got more nervous and upset as the minutes ticked by without her stepsister showing up. I felt horribly f...

serendipity · serendipity

That is Ok. I get it. But I feel powerless over me. And learning that HP can take over with me also. I can turn me over to HP, not just everyone else. LOving myself when my ex doesn't love me is really hard. I had crawled out of my funk for a few hours, almost strung together a day but then the feeling came back o...

kissers · kissers

This was a topic in a meeting this evening. I used to cower and hide when someone was angry with me. I always thought it was my fault. Thank God for Al-Anon. I no longer take on someone's anger. I am able to take a step back and look at the situation clearly without emotions going rampant. I look at my side of t...

gknee · gknee

Week 2 of H being sick at home. Lots of gastrointestinal complaints. Not going to work. Sleeping and watching baseball on tv. Won't go to the Dr. Wants me to call his boss (I refuse) Don't know if he is using or abusing substances (A? pot? vicodin? ambien?) or depressed or actually physically sick. I don...

marmare · marmare

Our girl has been moved from ICU to the trauma unit...they have removed the respirator so she is breathing on her own!!! The morning before last she opened her eyes and said TWO SENTENCES!!! Every little step is such a miracle!!! Thank you for all the prayers....keep them coming.....Hugs Mar

DelilahJones · DelilahJones

My plans to move on with my life away from my AH are chugging along. He is continuing his denial and his family (mostly his mom who I have had a GREAT relationship with) is having a really hard time accepting it all. They say that they understand why I am leaving but some things have been said that make me...

gimmpy · gimmpy

I haven't been here for a few weeks.My daughter got real angry, and moved out for about a month. after crying for days and missing work, life was more relaxed here. I felt guilty! My other kids were more at ease and it felt like home again. The place she was staying had no hot water, so she did come by every 5 d...

notcrazy62 · notcrazy62

A friend of mine went to an alanon meeting and it was explicitly expressed that one could not share about something that wasn't alanon. I am just wondering exactly what that means? anyone have a viewpoint on what that means? what is one discouraged from talking about? dave

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So I was wondering if anyone has this situation: Loved one is seriously ill and REQUIRES pain medications Loved one becomes addicted but cannot function without the medications Loved one's need for medications increases and doctors will not sufficiently medicate to alleviate all pain. This isn'...

CriedOut2 · CriedOut2

We have been married for over 20 years. My AH has not had a drink in 45 days. He now takes evening walks with me - won't talk, will help around the house, hardly talks, and we make love and he says "I love you." I tried to get him to talk about us and he states everything is fine - look at all I do. ...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

Read this out loud Autobiography In Five Short Chapters by Portia Nelson 1. I walk down the street, There is a deep hole in the sidewalk, I fall in I am lost.... I am helpless It isn't my fault. It takes forever to fi...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

((( Hello MIP Friends))) My AH moved back home last night a little prematurely than I'd expected but they were circumstances that were beyond both of our control. AH and I had been discussing over the weekends a plan of reunifying and as time has passed I have seen some very good changes in his attitude...

annmarie · annmarie

Probably a silly question......I can't figure it out though..... When I log into this site (on my own computer), I enter my user name and my password automatically defaults in. The save password box is not ticked, although I may have ticked this in the past? Now, there may be more than me using the compu...

tinaaz · tinaaz

Good Morning..Bare with me not sure what to say or where to begin. I am finding myself very hesitant to do do this..No sure why..humm I find myself putting my guard up.. A little scary for me you know -- Edited by tinaaz at 10:57, 2007-06-05

Tammy · Tammy

Well, I am very suprised at my husbands behavior this past weekend. My husband and I have been seperated on and off for the last two years. Most recently he left in May and said that he just couldnt do it anymore. He is an alcoholic who was arrested last September for his first DUI. Now he is on final not...

Rita G · Rita G

This morning I read the daily reading for Courage to Change pg 157 - I'm sure I have read this page before, but it never really hit me. The reading was talking about Step 3 - turning our will & lives over to the care of a Higher Power. This was the sentence that really hit me "Once I have acc...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So my mother in law called the other day she has been collecting unemployment for six months and her boyfriend who is addicted to oxycotton because of chronic pain from pancreitis(?) has had less and less work. He has worked hard for 30 years as a surveyor and usually makes over $25 an hr. She tells me o...

artgirl · artgirl

I have a question or am wondering about something. My partner has been in and out of the program for 10 months now. He does have a willingness to change but is really having a tough time. He is going to go to an outpatient program in our city and step up his meetings. I know that people this question aggrava...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I feel like I am at a turning point right now, I got a jail visitation form from my husband last week and I filled it out and have been mulling over and over what to do. In the beginning I assumed that I would pick my visit time and date and send it back. Lately, however, I have been pondering the idea of not re...

maresie2 · maresie2

as you all know I had to move into a tiny room with my two cats. The landlord has allowed an end stage alcoholic to move to the house. You can imagine how I feel. He is there every day littering up the porch with his cans of beer. He doesn't go anywhere because really all he wants to do is drink. He's already bro...

serendipity · serendipity

The girls had their dance recital last night. It was my 4 year old's first one. Their father didn't show. I didn't know what to expect. He has called a friend of mine and asked her about times for the show. Which means he is respecting my boundry of not contacting me directly. Last I told him was to get a law...

Katy · Katy

I get angry with myself that with all I am learning, that I can still make a pig's ear out of it, my feelings come to an head, and I have to let them out, I think it was ok to let them out, but I think the way I did it was wrong, I have tried to make ammends to my husband over the weekend but he won't let me, I tried to e...

rtexas · rtexas

.... cause it makes up for days like today. (sigh) Today is my wedding anniversary. 16 years and although we seperated once before now, this is the first time we have been seperated at the time of our anniversary. This sucks. It has been very hard to remember that I love my wife today. Hard to sideste...

DelilahJones · DelilahJones

This is probably a question for a lawyer but I'm wondering if anyone has any knowledge of this. Any feedback or experience is welcome. My AH is now saying that me leaving and moving with the kids is illegal. I live in WI and can't find any information on this issue.

ally · ally

(((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))) You all know my story with the recovering A in my life... Well, to me It has been cat and mouse games...To him It's not, (bla bla). Anyway, I am no longer texting him, In the way I once did. I have been detaching from him, "Little by Little", but not quite ready t...

gardengal · gardengal

For me it has taken a very long time to let the past go. It festered within my soul for many years, and ate at my well being. I would sit for hours on end and try to reinact a scenario which happened while my AH was here, and how I could have changed the event. I blamed myself for years for "his" drink...

thinkmink · thinkmink

I have been in al-anon for a year and a half. I haven't been to a f2f meeting in about 2 or 3 months. I started private therapy because the sponsor I had seems particularly critical. I got tired of telling her about the progress I had made only to be told that it was somehow not enough. My AH and I were supp...

victoria · victoria

I'll try to shorten this as much as possible. - I think step 2 is happening to me. That a power greater than me can restore me to sanity. I had a dream, of a young child who was on vacation and saw a bear cub wander into her back yard. When the girl attempted to approach the cub she heard and then saw the mother be...

serendipity · serendipity

I had my end of the year performance tonight. My oldest daughter danced and I danced ( I am a teacher there and the teachers and the advanced kids always do a finale dance). My youngest sister in law is one of my most talented students. So, my ex in laws were there. I saw my ex mil in the hallway before the sho...

maresie2 · maresie2

I think its going to be months to get the truck away from the A legally. There is not much I can do about it but go through the process step by step. I have to go back to court on June 20th and hopefully I will get the order then. Even then I may have to go get a contempt order to make him comply. In the meantime he...

victoria · victoria

I'm very new here, and actually have only been to 1-2 f2f meetings. I need to know something asap. My AH who is not in any recovery or never has been even though he has been in jail, forced treatment facilities etc. He is starting, after a long time, to drink and drive again. I pretty much just leave him alo...

bill f · bill f

First time posting here. I am a recovering A with 2 brothers who are still out there. My mother (78yo) is continually giving them money and trying to save them. My fear is that, as this continues, she will eventually run out of resources ($) leaving it to me and my family to care for her. I am going for a...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Good morning family))))), My daily meditation for this morning was wonderful. Just wanted to share a part of it with you. "We create the world we find by our every action. Each response we make to another .... sets in motion a new wave of activity..... To each moment we owe attention and we ha...

QOD · QOD

Hey Everyone - long time no post! I have been reading though. Work has been extremely busy, which is good for business but crappy for poor me who has to shuffle all of the paperwork. Anyway, just wanted to check in & give the latest on things. Things have been going really well w/my AH and his addic...

babysteps · babysteps

My husband is an A. His parents are A's, his sister is an A, my brother has admitted to having a problem with A, and I just found out my aunt is in rehab for the second time. It makes me terrified for my daughter's future.

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I have been finding myself pondering the thought that my A could decide to get better and we could live happily ever after again (damn that hope!) and have been thinking about the girl that he has gone to jail over or with twice now. It kills me that I love him so much and he would just go find someone else an...

rxygrl · rxygrl

I am frustrated and so tired of my sober a of almost 10yrs turning every conversation about work and money into him being the victim. I have tried detaching wiht love and it works great but I am still thinking doing that will make him do the right thing in his own time..Doesn't happen! My A;s job is up/dow...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	i remember first coming to this board nearly 3 years ago (Preview) I remember first coming to this board nearly 3 years ago and reading of people leaving their A's and I remember feeling that would never be me. I felt so sure I could find a way to make it work. Now all that seems impossible. I see more and more how impossible the A's attitude, lies, acting out, lack of limit...	maresie2	3	618	Jun 9, 2007 by btookey
	Starting Step One (Preview) I am ready to start working the steps. I have a wonderful person to be my sponsor, however she hasn't been active in AL-Anon for about 15 yrs, so she is not really sure how we go about it. Is there a specific way or a written guide? Any guidance would be greatly appreciated. Thanks, Lou	Loupiness	2	612	Jun 9, 2007 by gardengal
	I'm new- advice please (Preview) My partner is an alcoholic who attends his meetings. Al Anon has adviced me to part from him. Two months ago he came home and beat me up. I have 2 broken ribs. He has since moved out and we see each other. He said that he only now wants a friendship as he needs to recover and is confused. We meet regularly and he...	muppet	14	871	Jun 9, 2007 by Lunamoth
	A Pipers Kitty weekend! (Preview) (((((Family))))), Just wanted to wish you all a wonderful, happy weekend. I was given off this weekend (Fri-Sun) and we decided to make it an official Pipers Kitty weekend! Okay, I can see all the new faces saying "What the heck is this crazy woman talking about?" Several years ago I did a...	Karilynn	3	530	Jun 9, 2007 by Maria123
	trying to post..again (Preview) trial	belle1	1	501	Jun 9, 2007 by Maria123
	Question (Preview) My favorite page (if I had to pick only one) is 109 (April 18) in the Courage To Change daily reader. It reminds me where to place the focus, it tells that no one can be responsible for my happiness but myself. If I am unhappy what can I do about it, how can I be a more content person with others when I am disappo...	tea2	4	538	Jun 9, 2007 by gardengal
	When Sobriety Happens (Preview) Hello All Well my AH has been back home for about 10 days. Things are going good so far. Today will be his 2 week mark of Sobriety. He has had stretches of anywhere of 3 days to 10 days with out a drink so this is a milestone. I thought once he gets sober it will all be ok again. He is a completly different person...	janey225	6	812	Jun 9, 2007 by beachgrl
	yet another prayer request.... (Preview) You guys are the best.....when I find myself upset I immediatly think of all of you and know things will be okay because of the love and support I have here. I went and had my mamogram yesterday and now am totally freaking myself out. The imaging clinic called, they found something in one of my breasts...	marmare	11	670	Jun 9, 2007 by bubbles1990
	Teenage son continued.... (Preview) I'm venting my frustations, anxieties, fears, and concerns. I would love any feedback anyone has, both good and bad.... My son is 16, he will be 17 very soon. As I have posted previously, up until this year, at least to my knowledge, he's been a good kid. Good grades, great in sports, active in sc...	pabell	2	508	Jun 9, 2007 by mel123
	Should I drop the divorce proceedings? (Preview) know, we dont offer advice.. but what do you think you would do or have you done in a similar situation? Last fall, I took the kids and left my AH the day he came home from rehab. I filed for divorce the same day. He relapsed repeatedly, going back into rehab again, until he totaled his car and was arreste...	lmw	6	617	Jun 8, 2007 by wp
	Not sure (Preview) In August of 2005, I went to one al-anon meeting. I didn't get it... I didn't return. My husband had gone into a rehab program for one week... he relapsed. He went into a second rehab program in April of 06... he reached his one year of sobriety this past April. Lately, I've been angrier than ever. I'm no...	DJ	7	744	Jun 8, 2007 by Karilynn
	Austin, TX (Preview) For the past 7 years I have known that I no longer want to live here. I have been researching moving across the country to Austin, TX. I will not know anyone there. I will not have a job there. I am terrified. But, where I live now has not been good to me or for me. So, it is time to take the plunge. Today I m...	ditto	10	1528	Jun 8, 2007 by Trouble
	What do we teach our kids (Preview) ((((((Everyone)))))) Finally got my internet connection fixed. Whew, what a mess. So my son is off for the summer and was up at work with me today. He and a friend had planned on meeting up and playing basketball at a local rec center they have memberships to. I heard my son tell his friend that he "...	rtexas	5	784	Jun 8, 2007 by canadianguy
	how do I forgive myself? (Preview) When I was with my Abf we had some nasty arguments. Towards the end we seemed to fight all the time. We were as bad as each other. Except I even lashed out a couple of times. I am so, so guilty about this. As we are now distanced I am realising how sick he is, and how sick I was myself. I am getting slowly better no...	annmarie	4	680	Jun 8, 2007 by canadianguy
	New to all of this (Preview) I am new to all of this. Just wondering around on the net and found this site. I am wondering if my husband is an alcoholic - of course, he says he isn't. He drinks at least a 12 pack 5 to 6 nights a week. He drinks by himself. I ask for the weekends to be "family" oriented and he usually complie...	cwds35473	4	565	Jun 8, 2007 by Christy
	Doing the right thing (Preview) For me, the hardest part of having an AH is when he goes on binges and starts a conversation and sucks me into his craziness. For a while know I have been successfully detached. last night he got the best of me and now I am an exhausted bundle of nerves today. I keep telling myself to focus on taking car of m...	souljoy	3	712	Jun 8, 2007 by Islandlady
	sugar addiction (Preview) I am interested in learning more about alcoholism and sugar addiction. I consider myself to be addicted to sugar, and worry that if I were to drink I could easily develop an addiction to alcohol, given that its likely to be in the genes and environment. I seem to turn to sugar easily to comfort myself, a...	annmarie	2	532	Jun 8, 2007 by annmarie
	I'm a Green Belt now! (Preview) Well, I made it to my Martial Arts belt testing Saturday. My daughter and I are now official Green Belts. My son is already a Red Belt. AND on top of that, we were awarded the "Family of the Month" award. So as exhausting as the entire day was, it was very uplifting. :) Sincerely, QOD	QOD	11	607	Jun 8, 2007 by Lanchas
	Recovery, Anyone? (Preview) My AH was strangely missing from the house. His car was here, and everything was right where he left it. I tried to just go about my business, but I couldn't keep my mind from wandering. Finally I saw him get a beer from the trunk of the car and walk down the sidewalk. Curiosity got the better of me and I found...	RainyJamie	4	567	Jun 8, 2007 by gknee
	need your wise thoughts and reminders (Preview) I'm divorcing AH, also found out he was cheating and lying - alot. We have a 19 year old son away at college and a 15 year old son at home. AH is living in an apt in town. People are starting to find out about the divorce. They think he is the worlds nicest guy and are asking why. I've told only a very few close fri...	tryingtoheal	8	653	Jun 7, 2007 by RainyJamie
	overwhelming desire to..... (Preview) see my AH. I just want to look at him while he is still alive. Maybe hear his voice. See if he is there at all. what makes me feel this, what do i want? can't help it. I loved my husband very much. sometimes the horribleness of it hits me and i cannot believe where we are now. My Al Anon knowledge scared him. He co...	debilyn	3	433	Jun 7, 2007 by Becky1
	In continuation of the legalization issue.... (Preview) Just a thought, seems kind of ironic that America was formed but a bunch of 30 and 40 (my age) year olds who were tired of people telling them what to do...and look what we have become...Somtimes I think we have become so civilized we're starting to regress..	carolinagirl	2	468	Jun 7, 2007 by Kim65
	Spontaneous Remission? (Preview) The other day I posted a link as a reply on a thread and it talked about the ineffectiveness of AA but the thing I found most interesting in the article was the statement that about 5% of alcoholics have spontaneous remission every year. So basically they just quit with no help and are "better&quo...	carolinagirl	5	548	Jun 7, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Question about control (Preview) Last night my daughter made her confirmation. She chose her stepsister who is 23 to be her sponsor. We were to meet at the church at 7pm, a half hour before the ceremony was to start. My daughter got more nervous and upset as the minutes ticked by without her stepsister showing up. I felt horribly f...	Denoraphy	7	662	Jun 7, 2007 by emma
	I am powerless (Preview) That is Ok. I get it. But I feel powerless over me. And learning that HP can take over with me also. I can turn me over to HP, not just everyone else. LOving myself when my ex doesn't love me is really hard. I had crawled out of my funk for a few hours, almost strung together a day but then the feeling came back o...	serendipity	2	429	Jun 7, 2007 by CAM0914
	What do I do when someone is angry with me? (Preview) This was a topic in a meeting this evening. I used to cower and hide when someone was angry with me. I always thought it was my fault. Thank God for Al-Anon. I no longer take on someone's anger. I am able to take a step back and look at the situation clearly without emotions going rampant. I look at my side of t...	kissers	6	714	Jun 7, 2007 by gimmpy
	detaching or heartless? (Preview) Week 2 of H being sick at home. Lots of gastrointestinal complaints. Not going to work. Sleeping and watching baseball on tv. Won't go to the Dr. Wants me to call his boss (I refuse) Don't know if he is using or abusing substances (A? pot? vicodin? ambien?) or depressed or actually physically sick. I don...	gknee	6	831	Jun 7, 2007 by Jerry F
	Those that are praying...update (Preview) Our girl has been moved from ICU to the trauma unit...they have removed the respirator so she is breathing on her own!!! The morning before last she opened her eyes and said TWO SENTENCES!!! Every little step is such a miracle!!! Thank you for all the prayers....keep them coming.....Hugs Mar	marmare	6	468	Jun 7, 2007 by mel123
	Marriage counselling? (Preview) My plans to move on with my life away from my AH are chugging along. He is continuing his denial and his family (mostly his mom who I have had a GREAT relationship with) is having a really hard time accepting it all. They say that they understand why I am leaving but some things have been said that make me...	DelilahJones	12	689	Jun 6, 2007 by whitie
	she's back, but it got me to my first real meeting (Preview) I haven't been here for a few weeks.My daughter got real angry, and moved out for about a month. after crying for days and missing work, life was more relaxed here. I felt guilty! My other kids were more at ease and it felt like home again. The place she was staying had no hot water, so she did come by every 5 d...	gimmpy	2	512	Jun 6, 2007 by wp
	what is not alanon? (Preview) A friend of mine went to an alanon meeting and it was explicitly expressed that one could not share about something that wasn't alanon. I am just wondering exactly what that means? anyone have a viewpoint on what that means? what is one discouraged from talking about? dave	notcrazy62	5	685	Jun 6, 2007 by serendipity
	Question (Preview) So I was wondering if anyone has this situation: Loved one is seriously ill and REQUIRES pain medications Loved one becomes addicted but cannot function without the medications Loved one's need for medications increases and doctors will not sufficiently medicate to alleviate all pain. This isn'...	carolinagirl	6	550	Jun 6, 2007 by debilyn
	When will my AH start communicating?? (Preview) We have been married for over 20 years. My AH has not had a drink in 45 days. He now takes evening walks with me - won't talk, will help around the house, hardly talks, and we make love and he says "I love you." I tried to get him to talk about us and he states everything is fine - look at all I do. ...	CriedOut2	9	644	Jun 6, 2007 by lilms
	Autobiography in 5 short chapters... (Preview) Read this out loud Autobiography In Five Short Chapters by Portia Nelson 1. I walk down the street, There is a deep hole in the sidewalk, I fall in I am lost.... I am helpless It isn't my fault. It takes forever to fi...	Lunamoth	7	3609	Jun 6, 2007 by emma
	My AH is back in the home (Preview) ((( Hello MIP Friends))) My AH moved back home last night a little prematurely than I'd expected but they were circumstances that were beyond both of our control. AH and I had been discussing over the weekends a plan of reunifying and as time has passed I have seen some very good changes in his attitude...	twinmom2	5	643	Jun 6, 2007 by sweetums
	computer question?! (Preview) Probably a silly question......I can't figure it out though..... When I log into this site (on my own computer), I enter my user name and my password automatically defaults in. The save password box is not ticked, although I may have ticked this in the past? Now, there may be more than me using the compu...	annmarie	2	390	Jun 6, 2007 by annmarie
	New here (Preview) Good Morning..Bare with me not sure what to say or where to begin. I am finding myself very hesitant to do do this..No sure why..humm I find myself putting my guard up.. A little scary for me you know -- Edited by tinaaz at 10:57, 2007-06-05	tinaaz	6	569	Jun 6, 2007 by abbyal
	Why do you think ???????? (Preview) Well, I am very suprised at my husbands behavior this past weekend. My husband and I have been seperated on and off for the last two years. Most recently he left in May and said that he just couldnt do it anymore. He is an alcoholic who was arrested last September for his first DUI. Now he is on final not...	Tammy	11	621	Jun 5, 2007 by Lunamoth
	Untouched by this disease (Preview) This morning I read the daily reading for Courage to Change pg 157 - I'm sure I have read this page before, but it never really hit me. The reading was talking about Step 3 - turning our will & lives over to the care of a Higher Power. This was the sentence that really hit me "Once I have acc...	Rita G	2	480	Jun 5, 2007 by InsertCleverNameHere
	Leaving the problem here. (Preview) So my mother in law called the other day she has been collecting unemployment for six months and her boyfriend who is addicted to oxycotton because of chronic pain from pancreitis(?) has had less and less work. He has worked hard for 30 years as a surveyor and usually makes over $25 an hr. She tells me o...	carolinagirl	3	589	Jun 5, 2007 by InsertCleverNameHere
	Recovery Rate (Preview) I have a question or am wondering about something. My partner has been in and out of the program for 10 months now. He does have a willingness to change but is really having a tough time. He is going to go to an outpatient program in our city and step up his meetings. I know that people this question aggrava...	artgirl	8	601	Jun 5, 2007 by artgirl
	What to do???? (Preview) I feel like I am at a turning point right now, I got a jail visitation form from my husband last week and I filled it out and have been mulling over and over what to do. In the beginning I assumed that I would pick my visit time and date and send it back. Lately, however, I have been pondering the idea of not re...	carolinagirl	4	532	Jun 5, 2007 by QOD
	moving back and forth (Preview) as you all know I had to move into a tiny room with my two cats. The landlord has allowed an end stage alcoholic to move to the house. You can imagine how I feel. He is there every day littering up the porch with his cans of beer. He doesn't go anywhere because really all he wants to do is drink. He's already bro...	maresie2	3	533	Jun 5, 2007 by carolinagirl
	He Didn't Show (Preview) The girls had their dance recital last night. It was my 4 year old's first one. Their father didn't show. I didn't know what to expect. He has called a friend of mine and asked her about times for the show. Which means he is respecting my boundry of not contacting me directly. Last I told him was to get a law...	serendipity	3	550	Jun 5, 2007 by kissers
	awarness after my slip!! (Preview) I get angry with myself that with all I am learning, that I can still make a pig's ear out of it, my feelings come to an head, and I have to let them out, I think it was ok to let them out, but I think the way I did it was wrong, I have tried to make ammends to my husband over the weekend but he won't let me, I tried to e...	Katy	3	588	Jun 5, 2007 by Katy
	Thank goodness most days I am doing pretty good... (Preview) .... cause it makes up for days like today. (sigh) Today is my wedding anniversary. 16 years and although we seperated once before now, this is the first time we have been seperated at the time of our anniversary. This sucks. It has been very hard to remember that I love my wife today. Hard to sideste...	rtexas	11	1348	Jun 5, 2007 by just me
	Illegal to leave with kids? (Preview) This is probably a question for a lawyer but I'm wondering if anyone has any knowledge of this. Any feedback or experience is welcome. My AH is now saying that me leaving and moving with the kids is illegal. I live in WI and can't find any information on this issue.	DelilahJones	14	708	Jun 5, 2007 by abbyal
	WHEN IS A SLIP, NOT A SLIP ??????? (Preview) (((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))) You all know my story with the recovering A in my life... Well, to me It has been cat and mouse games...To him It's not, (bla bla). Anyway, I am no longer texting him, In the way I once did. I have been detaching from him, "Little by Little", but not quite ready t...	ally	5	996	Jun 5, 2007 by debilyn
	Are you living in the past, and worrying about the future? (Preview) For me it has taken a very long time to let the past go. It festered within my soul for many years, and ate at my well being. I would sit for hours on end and try to reinact a scenario which happened while my AH was here, and how I could have changed the event. I blamed myself for years for "his" drink...	gardengal	4	818	Jun 4, 2007 by glasshouse
	protecting myself and my child (Preview) I have been in al-anon for a year and a half. I haven't been to a f2f meeting in about 2 or 3 months. I started private therapy because the sponsor I had seems particularly critical. I got tired of telling her about the progress I had made only to be told that it was somehow not enough. My AH and I were supp...	thinkmink	4	638	Jun 4, 2007 by lin0606
	Step 2 is happening (Preview) I'll try to shorten this as much as possible. - I think step 2 is happening to me. That a power greater than me can restore me to sanity. I had a dream, of a young child who was on vacation and saw a bear cub wander into her back yard. When the girl attempted to approach the cub she heard and then saw the mother be...	victoria	3	436	Jun 4, 2007 by InsertCleverNameHere
	If You Don't Have Something Nice To Say (Preview) I had my end of the year performance tonight. My oldest daughter danced and I danced ( I am a teacher there and the teachers and the advanced kids always do a finale dance). My youngest sister in law is one of my most talented students. So, my ex in laws were there. I saw my ex mil in the hallway before the sho...	serendipity	5	644	Jun 4, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Update (Preview) I think its going to be months to get the truck away from the A legally. There is not much I can do about it but go through the process step by step. I have to go back to court on June 20th and hopefully I will get the order then. Even then I may have to go get a contempt order to make him comply. In the meantime he...	maresie2	3	425	Jun 4, 2007 by carolinagirl
	need to know (Preview) I'm very new here, and actually have only been to 1-2 f2f meetings. I need to know something asap. My AH who is not in any recovery or never has been even though he has been in jail, forced treatment facilities etc. He is starting, after a long time, to drink and drive again. I pretty much just leave him alo...	victoria	15	717	Jun 4, 2007 by carolena
	Enabling an Enabler??? (Preview) First time posting here. I am a recovering A with 2 brothers who are still out there. My mother (78yo) is continually giving them money and trying to save them. My fear is that, as this continues, she will eventually run out of resources ($) leaving it to me and my family to care for her. I am going for a...	bill f	9	852	Jun 4, 2007 by bill f
	Staying positive works! (Preview) (((((Good morning family))))), My daily meditation for this morning was wonderful. Just wanted to share a part of it with you. "We create the world we find by our every action. Each response we make to another .... sets in motion a new wave of activity..... To each moment we owe attention and we ha...	Karilynn	2	374	Jun 4, 2007 by marmare
	Just an update and bit of a vent (Preview) Hey Everyone - long time no post! I have been reading though. Work has been extremely busy, which is good for business but crappy for poor me who has to shuffle all of the paperwork. Anyway, just wanted to check in & give the latest on things. Things have been going really well w/my AH and his addic...	QOD	5	661	Jun 4, 2007 by QOD
	I'm surrounded (Preview) My husband is an A. His parents are A's, his sister is an A, my brother has admitted to having a problem with A, and I just found out my aunt is in rehab for the second time. It makes me terrified for my daughter's future.	babysteps	4	484	Jun 3, 2007 by Kim65
	Detaching is hard...the with love part is harder! (Preview) I have been finding myself pondering the thought that my A could decide to get better and we could live happily ever after again (damn that hope!) and have been thinking about the girl that he has gone to jail over or with twice now. It kills me that I love him so much and he would just go find someone else an...	carolinagirl	7	691	Jun 3, 2007 by maresie2
	dealing with sobriety and the financial issues (Preview) I am frustrated and so tired of my sober a of almost 10yrs turning every conversation about work and money into him being the victim. I have tried detaching wiht love and it works great but I am still thinking doing that will make him do the right thing in his own time..Doesn't happen! My A;s job is up/dow...	rxygrl	9	761	Jun 3, 2007 by maresie2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.