Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

roxygirl · roxygirl

Can you please tell me the purpose of Alanon? Is it to help me to take care of me? And to learn how not to take on the Alcoholic's problems? Please help me see the light. Thanks, Roxygirl

maresie · maresie

Today I had to detach from something at work. I did it so well! I am so happy I am no longer just one long non stop reaction person. One of my colleagues is devastated.I really tried to model detachment for her but reaction is what she knows. I know I was there. I choose to be more functional these days. I k...

cbu03 · cbu03

I am fairly new here and my husband is an alcoholic. He has tried to cut back on his drinking, but the thing is that I don't like to be around him when he does not drink. On the days he does not drink, he just lays around and is very high strung. The days that he does drink, by the end of the night I can't stand t...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I keep wondering this to myself. Last week I got the renewal letter for my lease, it had fill in the blank dates for how long I wanted to stay. One year is up and I found myself filling it out for another year but putting it in my drawer. I was entertaining thoughts of moving to a strange new place, finding...

onestep@atime · onestep@atime

My A husband has put me through hell for the last 7 years. I can't understand why I don't hate him and have a strong desire to help him. He is once again trying to quit, mostly I think because he is afraid I am going to take his only son and go back home which is 1200 miles from here. I don't understand his attitu...

Dragongirl777 · Dragongirl777

I just found this forum as I sat here trying to figure out what to do next. My A husband was sober for about 4 yrs and relapsed a month or so ago. He went into rehab and got out last week. He went right back to using/drinking. I confronted him today when I realized and now I'm at an impass. I want to leave, I want...

Libby · Libby

My son 19 has been binge drinking for a month. Also on anti-depressants. The result is what you guys of course know all about. He is not violent to me or my son 15 but is putting himself at great risk, stealing, smashing things, blacking out, blames the medication, doesn't want to stop drinking. I am cons...

afmom03 · afmom03

Hello Strangers!! <LOL> It has been 6 months since I've been able to log-in to post anything becuz this stupid computer wouldn't let me without "cookies en- abled"??? Whatever that is! <LOL> But...here it is almost 2:30am and I'm sooo awake and ex...

Tracy · Tracy

my AB has been sober for a couple of weeks since I no longer have lots of drama alot of feelings are coming to the surface and I am turning in to a provocker He still has not drank as far as I am aware. You see when he drinks and goes missing I think he cheats i have caught him once and tried to get over it. But some...

mo14 · mo14

Hi All Well I needed to vent and I hear this is a better place than the A in our lives to vent. As some of you know I moved out from my A last Wednesday and I dont know if I have mentioned it before but even high he always been an awesome father. He has always been an awesome father...well after saying that when...

buick23 · buick23

Today was the first day I did not worry about what he was doing, what he was thinking, and I did not obsess over anything that was going on today. I was able to go through the day without being upset, worried, or sad. We had a nice dinner together, laughed together. He is starting to open up more and I know it a...

Becky1 · Becky1

Why am I always attracted to men who are not available to me.....either physically or emotionally...... I talked to my soon to be ex AH one evening this past week. He gave me a copy of the dissolution papers to look over. I really did OK with it, I didn't cry or come home and have to take nerve pills. In fac...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

Some of you may remember that I am going to start college this fall and finally complete my degree, two degrees actually. I will get an associate of arts, and an associate of applied science in medical information technology. That will allow me to work as a biller/coder, a transcriptionist, a variety...

lostgirl · lostgirl

I just found this place from a search engine after having one of the worst days of my life. My live-in boyfriend of ten years is an alcoholic, and has gotten progressively more moody and unpredictable over the past year and a half. Today, he got so mad at me and his kids (13 and 19) that he scared us all by sm...

Maria123 · Maria123

I was just asked out! I am a nervous wreck. I said "just as friends, right?" He responds yes, I don't know where I am going in my life. This guy is my neighbor. We've been talking just in passing often. Every once in a while, we chat for a while about "life." I am pretty sure this g...

Suzannah · Suzannah

and then I feel I cannot cope with any of it even though I am conscious that I am leaning on my HP and letting go, letting God. I have spent the last two weeks taking phone call after phone call and reading text after text and hearing my daughter's sadness; it seems that she will never to happy, never be love...

norwood · norwood

I never understood how people could go searching for the "smoking gun", and yet there I went on my search and found what I was looking for. I had all the pointers to my qualifier's drinking problems, but it wasn't enough. She ended it over a year aog and I am moving on and working my program. ...

Codependent · Codependent

I guess I am looking for some hope here, but I just wondered- once again- if anyone ever sees thier A. I know I have asked this question before- forgive me. My As mom and I have been talking that he really seems to think that when he gets out of jail his life and himself are going to be different. But, it's li...

buick23 · buick23

Once again, I've picked up the book "codependent no more". I'm in the middle of the part "feel your own feelings". As I started reading about "repressing feelings" and what that can do for people I saw a connection between those feelings and my Asober. "we lose...

SmallSteps · SmallSteps

I finally stood up for myself to the A who has been treating me like crap for a few months (after weaseling back into my life even though he humiliated at the beginning of the year). I told him I wouldn't keep coming over when he called after hanging out with other people (lately a girl he swears he's not sle...

carosie · carosie

Dear MIP Family, A week ago today my hubby passed away. I lost my best friend...my soulmate. My heart is broken. I have been taken it an hour and sometimes a minute at a time. He was the kindest and gentlest man I have ever known. He passed peacefully which was how he lived his life. I find some comfo...

joyoma · joyoma

This week was a whirlwind and I am left breathless. My VATS surgery of 7/14 has not left me sick. I am doing OK. BUT this week a phone call from the cancer center saying: "We want you to come in on August 6 to discuss chemo."......I was totally undone as I had just prayed so hard never to have to...

charlescharles · charlescharles

...for all the kind words and suggestions..much appreciated i have little feed back for others at this point...guess i am so wrapped up and emeshed in my own world...i think this is a negative character trait but for now this is all i've got my heart and head seem to be getting more and more on the same pag...

serendipity · serendipity

I had a lawn sale today. I did it all by myself. I hate selling my stuff, it is just so awkward. I had a hard time hanging up the signs because I feel like someone is going to yell at me. But I did it. And it went well, the neighbors came out and chatted, that was great. I made a bit of money (which I need so badly)....

mo14 · mo14

Hi All, Well I know in my last post I mentioned I was moving on Friday...well life changes sometimes and I moved Wednesday instead. The two days before I left my A called me everything in his vocabulary to make me feel bad about myself. I did something back that I would never have believed I would......

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Continue to have the best possible doctors ( more than one! ), counselors on board for my healthcare team. I cannot stress enough how stress has played a role in my life......... from a thyroid imbalance through living with an alcoholic, and hormonal changes (pms to menopause). Stress can...

Maria123 · Maria123

(((((((((((((((((Friends)))))))))))))))))))))))))))),

MBJ · MBJ

Hi everyone. I am new member here and hopefully some of you can hand over some advice. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been sober for little over a year and things have been going great. Lately we have both been going through really tough and stressful times. We just bought a house so we are going throug...

bugs39 · bugs39

My AH has been attempting recovery for almost a year. We have had many bumps along the way....It was two weeks ago that I reached my bottom....enough is enough. He loving accepted the boundaries I established and vowed that he does not want this in his life and if he continues it will only lead to total...

KimG143 · KimG143

My first post here was in OCT. 2007 I had just gone to my 1st Al-anon meeting. 9 months later and a whole lot of work has brought me back. The crying, shaking and confusion began to fade as I made it to more meetings. I began making new friends, living a life, and not looking at my AH with hatred and resentm...

stormie · stormie

Even though my AH has his sobriety, attends two meeting weekly, we are back together in our home, and I experience varying "degrees" of serenity and peace frequently, I sense something emerging in me that seems to be getting stronger ~ it's sort of nagging me. This something are my daily...

debilyn · debilyn

I am in the process of going to dang consultain app.s then preops, then surgery stuff for my torn knee and wrist. Then I have to do a sleep study, then start again for the torn ligament.... Have put all this off too long. Medicare does not pay for it all so my internet will probably disappear for awhile. Ot...

buick23 · buick23

My almost 4 months sober A told me today that he doesn't believe he needs AA and rehab and since he's still sober he thinks that he can do it on his own. I believe the program is keeping him from drinking again. He quit for 2 months a year ago and started drinking again. I've read a lot of posts about stark rav...

charlescharles · charlescharles

i had to dial 911 yesterday after my a came over in a rage..starting screaming and yelling then all broke loose with punches kicks spitting smacking and of course verbal abuse..i was the instigator of the physical when i pushed her...then it just steam roled...she began trashing my place..i dialed...

glad · glad

It helps to come back and read what I and others have previously posted. Perhaps I will get in a better frame of mind by doing so. Today I am "feeling" all this stuff about a disease is just a big fat excuse for people who don't care enough about themselves and those who love them to even try. Toda...

ruthiez · ruthiez

Sometimes I think I'm more comfortable living in denial. It is easier to live as if something isn't going on. However, events are forcing me to face things and to be honest i don't like it. My son is an A and well it is getting to were we can't just ignore his problem Well I probably could but my spouse an...

SmallSteps · SmallSteps

I'm slowly trying to make some changes in my life, some of which involve detatching from some unhealthy situations for a while. I don't want to have too much free time left on my hands to fill with worry and overthinking. I'd rather spend that time doing something enjoy able for myself. I'm thinking it'...

nmike · nmike

I put in an application for a job yesterday. Scarey. I was rejected last time. They reopened the position. I think that I am highly qualified. It would be for more money but I would have to move out of my house, etc. I am trying to stay positive and stay in the moment. What happens, happens. Let's see what ha...

Cherish · Cherish

Hello Everyone! This is my first time on an Al-anon forum - I haven't been to a meeting yet. But will be in the next few days. This is my first step towards changing my life. A little about me... I'm the girlfriend of an alcoholic (14yr relationship). I'm the daughter of an alcoholic and drug addict Father...

ddub · ddub

Here I was plodding along for almost a year in al anon with progress and slips when I feel like I was hit with an emotional storm that I hadn't really experienced. Now I can relate to others some more but yet so much to understand and always more to learn. The positive stress of good things to happen and d...

Codependent · Codependent

I haven't posted in a while. My A is in jail and has been for 6 months. However, he has the possibility of being released in the next month. While he has been incarcerated his "old" normal personality has reemerged from the fogged state it had become. We have had great funny conversation...

Hi everyone, new member. · lildaisy81

Hello everyone. I am new member to this board. I didn't realize that there was a forum out there for this but I'm very happy that I found it. Here is my story: I'm 26 years old and I have a father that is an alcoholic. My whole life he has had a problem and as the years go on, the problem gets worse. He's been to re...

mslouise · mslouise

Good morning, In my al-anon meetings the topic of trying to make everything perfect or being perfect has come up once and while. This has really got me thinking. I know that when my Abf was active, I used to try to make things as perfect as possible, so as too not rock the boat to make his drinking wo...

PinkTexas · PinkTexas

I dont even know where to start. My father has gotten to be such a horrible drunk and theres nothing I can do about it. I moved back home to be some what of a support system for my mother. My father yelled at me last night and told me I was going no where in life and that I was going to turn out just like him. I have a...

maresie · b

Thanks to everyone who left me lovely replies to my post earlier on in the week, it really helps me to know my feelings of hate and resentment are natural and not to be ashamed of! In the last few days I've kept hold of the mantra one of you suggested to me: the 3 C's - I didn't cause my mother's addiction, I can...

offtop · offtop

Sorry in advance if my first post here is too long or confusing but I'm under alot of stress right now. I've been living with my girlfriend and her 3 kids for about 7 months now. I have a son I get on the weekends too. We've been in a relationship about 3 years. Her kids love me like a father and my son loves h...

A Family Members Passing · tea2

Dear Family, Our Karilynn has lost her hubby.He passed away sober this morning and she has asked for our prayers at this time..

charlescharles · charlescharles

i am having a hard time trusting my a..an incident happened a while back that keeps popping up in my head...when i confronted her she got really upset...tried to flip it back on me and really just made the whole thing worse she has looked me in the eye before and denied and said it didn't happen but it just k...

JenniferN · JenniferN

_______________________________________________________________________BIRTHING LIZARD If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toil...

roxygirl · roxygirl

My son is the alcoholic and he's on his own struggling in life because he made it that way!! He is living with his friend and his friend's mother and he blew all his money! He called my younger son and told him he was hungry and he had no money to buy food. Well, my younger son is very strong when it comes to hi...

david62 · david62

July Business Meeting Minutes: MIP Business meeting, held July 13, 2008. Chair opened meeting with the Serenity Prayer 1st thing on agenda was the Secretary's report: Secretary was absent from meeting.Minutes from June business meeting were presented by the chair and were accepted as written by...

Becky1 · Becky1

Friday, my daughter asked me to go to the fair with her and my grandbaby, Delilah, almost 8 months old. We three girls went and had a ball! We ate all kinds of junk, let the baby pat the deer, goats, a kangaroo. My daughter had the baby's and her pic made with a real life lemur. It bit my daughter on the fin...

ddub · ddub

pieces of a conversation today he (AH) says, she says What are you thinking about? Lots of things like, I don't think of you as shy do you? What? you said that once I know how to be outgoing but sometimes I don't want to be when I am. I see, that makes sense as you seem outgoing. you are random, deep and not fu...

MomGayle42 · b

Hi all, I'm 18 and currently living at home with my alcoholic mother and younger brother. My mum's been through the hard work and pain of detox several times, has been admitted to hospital and been told by doctors that she has 2 years to live unless she sticks to being tee-total - which she never does. Thi...

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

Now that I am living separately from my AH and over the grief and the ripping apart from the sickly familiar, I have really grown to enjoy not being in a relationship with an alcoholic and I am still amazed how blind I was to who he is. It's been almost a month and I am proud of myself and there is no feeling of...

jaysbaby · jaysbaby

Hi everyone...just to give you an update on my rollercoaster life with my alcoholic husband... as a last resort, he went on his own to see a new psychiatrist last week. My husband has a 10 year history of substance abuse (cocaine, beer)... In the last year, he has been diagnosed with bipolar and hypoma...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi everyone... Like many others on here, I am a huge fan of the book series "Getting Them Sober" (particularly volume one), written by Toby Rice Drews. This book is said to be one of THE best resources for those living around active alcoholism. I recently purchased a large quantity of th...

kitty · kitty

My bff came over yesterday & his job is in jeopardy. For the last 3 months there has been this consultant at his work place observing. Now the hammer has come down. BFF got fired from his last job. His friend got him hired at this place. His friend sounds to me like if he's an addict/alcoholic. If he i...

Becky1 · Becky1

I got an apartment, after years of living in an abusive A situation with my husband of almost 8 years. We've been together 11, and then some. He's been yelling he wanted a divorce for years. I withdrew $$$ from my 401K to get a new car after I totaled my other one. I got an apartment, I paid to have all my s...

desperate for help · desperate for help

I think I have taken all I can take. I just honestly do not care anymore. He can drink as much as he wants. I no longer say anything, don't care. He's the one to act like the idiot. He's the one people hate being around. He's the one that looks like a fool. I am tired of covering up for him. I just don't c...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	??RE: ALANON?? (Preview) Can you please tell me the purpose of Alanon? Is it to help me to take care of me? And to learn how not to take on the Alcoholic's problems? Please help me see the light. Thanks, Roxygirl	roxygirl	7	663	Jul 30, 2008 by abbyal
	detaching (Preview) Today I had to detach from something at work. I did it so well! I am so happy I am no longer just one long non stop reaction person. One of my colleagues is devastated.I really tried to model detachment for her but reaction is what she knows. I know I was there. I choose to be more functional these days. I k...	maresie	4	531	Jul 30, 2008 by maresie
	Having a hard time coping (Preview) I am fairly new here and my husband is an alcoholic. He has tried to cut back on his drinking, but the thing is that I don't like to be around him when he does not drink. On the days he does not drink, he just lays around and is very high strung. The days that he does drink, by the end of the night I can't stand t...	cbu03	7	678	Jul 30, 2008 by Loupiness
	Am I really better? (Preview) I keep wondering this to myself. Last week I got the renewal letter for my lease, it had fill in the blank dates for how long I wanted to stay. One year is up and I found myself filling it out for another year but putting it in my drawer. I was entertaining thoughts of moving to a strange new place, finding...	carolinagirl	4	441	Jul 30, 2008 by maire rua
	Is he ashamed of me and his son? (Preview) My A husband has put me through hell for the last 7 years. I can't understand why I don't hate him and have a strong desire to help him. He is once again trying to quit, mostly I think because he is afraid I am going to take his only son and go back home which is 1200 miles from here. I don't understand his attitu...	onestep@atime	2	3625	Jul 29, 2008 by lin0606
	New here... in crisis. (Preview) I just found this forum as I sat here trying to figure out what to do next. My A husband was sober for about 4 yrs and relapsed a month or so ago. He went into rehab and got out last week. He went right back to using/drinking. I confronted him today when I realized and now I'm at an impass. I want to leave, I want...	Dragongirl777	5	1272	Jul 29, 2008 by stariana
	Just starting out here (Preview) My son 19 has been binge drinking for a month. Also on anti-depressants. The result is what you guys of course know all about. He is not violent to me or my son 15 but is putting himself at great risk, stealing, smashing things, blacking out, blames the medication, doesn't want to stop drinking. I am cons...	Libby	4	847	Jul 29, 2008 by Libby
	What a Difference 6 Months Made! (Preview) Hello Strangers!! <LOL> It has been 6 months since I've been able to log-in to post anything becuz this stupid computer wouldn't let me without "cookies en- abled"??? Whatever that is! <LOL> But...here it is almost 2:30am and I'm sooo awake and ex...	afmom03	1	539	Jul 29, 2008 by glad
	denial (Preview) my AB has been sober for a couple of weeks since I no longer have lots of drama alot of feelings are coming to the surface and I am turning in to a provocker He still has not drank as far as I am aware. You see when he drinks and goes missing I think he cheats i have caught him once and tried to get over it. But some...	Tracy	3	500	Jul 29, 2008 by kitty
	tomorrow (Preview) Hi All Well I needed to vent and I hear this is a better place than the A in our lives to vent. As some of you know I moved out from my A last Wednesday and I dont know if I have mentioned it before but even high he always been an awesome father. He has always been an awesome father...well after saying that when...	mo14	5	474	Jul 29, 2008 by norwood
	another good day (Preview) Today was the first day I did not worry about what he was doing, what he was thinking, and I did not obsess over anything that was going on today. I was able to go through the day without being upset, worried, or sad. We had a nice dinner together, laughed together. He is starting to open up more and I know it a...	buick23	1	386	Jul 29, 2008 by mslouise
	Why Do I Always Do This? (Preview) Why am I always attracted to men who are not available to me.....either physically or emotionally...... I talked to my soon to be ex AH one evening this past week. He gave me a copy of the dissolution papers to look over. I really did OK with it, I didn't cry or come home and have to take nerve pills. In fac...	Becky1	1	616	Jul 29, 2008 by debilyn
	God works in mysterious ways (Preview) Some of you may remember that I am going to start college this fall and finally complete my degree, two degrees actually. I will get an associate of arts, and an associate of applied science in medical information technology. That will allow me to work as a biller/coder, a transcriptionist, a variety...	Tenderheartsks	3	565	Jul 28, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	New and need help (Preview) I just found this place from a search engine after having one of the worst days of my life. My live-in boyfriend of ten years is an alcoholic, and has gotten progressively more moody and unpredictable over the past year and a half. Today, he got so mad at me and his kids (13 and 19) that he scared us all by sm...	lostgirl	8	521	Jul 28, 2008 by theresawebb14
	alright gang, talk me off the ledge here (Preview) I was just asked out! I am a nervous wreck. I said "just as friends, right?" He responds yes, I don't know where I am going in my life. This guy is my neighbor. We've been talking just in passing often. Every once in a while, we chat for a while about "life." I am pretty sure this g...	Maria123	14	809	Jul 28, 2008 by wp
	Some days it's all too much...and I get overwhelmed... (Preview) and then I feel I cannot cope with any of it even though I am conscious that I am leaning on my HP and letting go, letting God. I have spent the last two weeks taking phone call after phone call and reading text after text and hearing my daughter's sadness; it seems that she will never to happy, never be love...	Suzannah	5	962	Jul 28, 2008 by Suzannah
	the smoking gun (Preview) I never understood how people could go searching for the "smoking gun", and yet there I went on my search and found what I was looking for. I had all the pointers to my qualifier's drinking problems, but it wasn't enough. She ended it over a year aog and I am moving on and working my program. ...	norwood	6	832	Jul 28, 2008 by Maria123
	Change (Preview) I guess I am looking for some hope here, but I just wondered- once again- if anyone ever sees thier A. I know I have asked this question before- forgive me. My As mom and I have been talking that he really seems to think that when he gets out of jail his life and himself are going to be different. But, it's li...	Codependent	8	570	Jul 28, 2008 by Codependent
	lightbulb moment (Preview) Once again, I've picked up the book "codependent no more". I'm in the middle of the part "feel your own feelings". As I started reading about "repressing feelings" and what that can do for people I saw a connection between those feelings and my Asober. "we lose...	buick23	6	561	Jul 28, 2008 by maresie
	I finally did it (long and kinda rant-y, I guess) (Preview) I finally stood up for myself to the A who has been treating me like crap for a few months (after weaseling back into my life even though he humiliated at the beginning of the year). I told him I wouldn't keep coming over when he called after hanging out with other people (lately a girl he swears he's not sle...	SmallSteps	3	625	Jul 28, 2008 by maresie
	sad news ( 1 2 ) (Preview) Dear MIP Family, A week ago today my hubby passed away. I lost my best friend...my soulmate. My heart is broken. I have been taken it an hour and sometimes a minute at a time. He was the kindest and gentlest man I have ever known. He passed peacefully which was how he lived his life. I find some comfo...	carosie	43	1445	Jul 28, 2008 by carolinagirl
	whirlwind! (Preview) This week was a whirlwind and I am left breathless. My VATS surgery of 7/14 has not left me sick. I am doing OK. BUT this week a phone call from the cancer center saying: "We want you to come in on August 6 to discuss chemo."......I was totally undone as I had just prayed so hard never to have to...	joyoma	2	377	Jul 28, 2008 by Gailey
	gratefully thankful (Preview) ...for all the kind words and suggestions..much appreciated i have little feed back for others at this point...guess i am so wrapped up and emeshed in my own world...i think this is a negative character trait but for now this is all i've got my heart and head seem to be getting more and more on the same pag...	charlescharles	5	492	Jul 27, 2008 by lin0606
	The Lawn Sale (Preview) I had a lawn sale today. I did it all by myself. I hate selling my stuff, it is just so awkward. I had a hard time hanging up the signs because I feel like someone is going to yell at me. But I did it. And it went well, the neighbors came out and chatted, that was great. I made a bit of money (which I need so badly)....	serendipity	8	723	Jul 27, 2008 by Becky1
	Update on move (Preview) Hi All, Well I know in my last post I mentioned I was moving on Friday...well life changes sometimes and I moved Wednesday instead. The two days before I left my A called me everything in his vocabulary to make me feel bad about myself. I did something back that I would never have believed I would......	mo14	2	358	Jul 27, 2008 by Becky1
	Six (or Thirty?) Years Later and I Still........... (Preview) Continue to have the best possible doctors ( more than one! ), counselors on board for my healthcare team. I cannot stress enough how stress has played a role in my life......... from a thyroid imbalance through living with an alcoholic, and hormonal changes (pms to menopause). Stress can...	wallsal55	1	544	Jul 26, 2008 by nmike
	Why Does It ALWAYS Have to Begin with ME First?????? (Preview) (((((((((((((((((Friends)))))))))))))))))))))))))))),	Maria123	6	890	Jul 26, 2008 by abbyal
	Some advice needed (Preview) Hi everyone. I am new member here and hopefully some of you can hand over some advice. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been sober for little over a year and things have been going great. Lately we have both been going through really tough and stressful times. We just bought a house so we are going throug...	MBJ	6	741	Jul 26, 2008 by Sincerely
	stinking thinking (Preview) My AH has been attempting recovery for almost a year. We have had many bumps along the way....It was two weeks ago that I reached my bottom....enough is enough. He loving accepted the boundaries I established and vowed that he does not want this in his life and if he continues it will only lead to total...	bugs39	4	601	Jul 26, 2008 by kitty
	I've come a long way (Preview) My first post here was in OCT. 2007 I had just gone to my 1st Al-anon meeting. 9 months later and a whole lot of work has brought me back. The crying, shaking and confusion began to fade as I made it to more meetings. I began making new friends, living a life, and not looking at my AH with hatred and resentm...	KimG143	2	525	Jul 26, 2008 by maresie
	Sober, but will he mature in time? (Preview) Even though my AH has his sobriety, attends two meeting weekly, we are back together in our home, and I experience varying "degrees" of serenity and peace frequently, I sense something emerging in me that seems to be getting stronger ~ it's sort of nagging me. This something are my daily...	stormie	20	866	Jul 26, 2008 by barisax
	fyi (Preview) I am in the process of going to dang consultain app.s then preops, then surgery stuff for my torn knee and wrist. Then I have to do a sleep study, then start again for the torn ligament.... Have put all this off too long. Medicare does not pay for it all so my internet will probably disappear for awhile. Ot...	debilyn	7	629	Jul 25, 2008 by debilyn
	In denial after getting sober? (Preview) My almost 4 months sober A told me today that he doesn't believe he needs AA and rehab and since he's still sober he thinks that he can do it on his own. I believe the program is keeping him from drinking again. He quit for 2 months a year ago and started drinking again. I've read a lot of posts about stark rav...	buick23	7	810	Jul 25, 2008 by Jerry F
	it hit the fan (Preview) i had to dial 911 yesterday after my a came over in a rage..starting screaming and yelling then all broke loose with punches kicks spitting smacking and of course verbal abuse..i was the instigator of the physical when i pushed her...then it just steam roled...she began trashing my place..i dialed...	charlescharles	14	873	Jul 25, 2008 by kitty
	Little mouse feels some sadness... (Preview) It helps to come back and read what I and others have previously posted. Perhaps I will get in a better frame of mind by doing so. Today I am "feeling" all this stuff about a disease is just a big fat excuse for people who don't care enough about themselves and those who love them to even try. Toda...	glad	3	829	Jul 25, 2008 by round3
	Uncomfortable (Preview) Sometimes I think I'm more comfortable living in denial. It is easier to live as if something isn't going on. However, events are forcing me to face things and to be honest i don't like it. My son is an A and well it is getting to were we can't just ignore his problem Well I probably could but my spouse an...	ruthiez	7	674	Jul 25, 2008 by Mommaceda
	I want to find things in my community to get involved in... (Preview) I'm slowly trying to make some changes in my life, some of which involve detatching from some unhealthy situations for a while. I don't want to have too much free time left on my hands to fill with worry and overthinking. I'd rather spend that time doing something enjoy able for myself. I'm thinking it'...	SmallSteps	9	685	Jul 25, 2008 by Jean4444
	Applied for another job (Preview) I put in an application for a job yesterday. Scarey. I was rejected last time. They reopened the position. I think that I am highly qualified. It would be for more money but I would have to move out of my house, etc. I am trying to stay positive and stay in the moment. What happens, happens. Let's see what ha...	nmike	7	614	Jul 25, 2008 by Jean4444
	Hi Everyone. I'm New Here... (Preview) Hello Everyone! This is my first time on an Al-anon forum - I haven't been to a meeting yet. But will be in the next few days. This is my first step towards changing my life. A little about me... I'm the girlfriend of an alcoholic (14yr relationship). I'm the daughter of an alcoholic and drug addict Father...	Cherish	8	593	Jul 24, 2008 by theresawebb14
	conflicting emotions (Preview) Here I was plodding along for almost a year in al anon with progress and slips when I feel like I was hit with an emotional storm that I hadn't really experienced. Now I can relate to others some more but yet so much to understand and always more to learn. The positive stress of good things to happen and d...	ddub	4	548	Jul 24, 2008 by nmike
	Incarceration (Preview) I haven't posted in a while. My A is in jail and has been for 6 months. However, he has the possibility of being released in the next month. While he has been incarcerated his "old" normal personality has reemerged from the fogged state it had become. We have had great funny conversation...	Codependent	6	503	Jul 24, 2008 by abbyal
	Hi everyone, new member. (Preview) Hello everyone. I am new member to this board. I didn't realize that there was a forum out there for this but I'm very happy that I found it. Here is my story: I'm 26 years old and I have a father that is an alcoholic. My whole life he has had a problem and as the years go on, the problem gets worse. He's been to re...	lildaisy81	4	622	Jul 24, 2008 by danz123
	2 parts - Having everything perfect & pms ? (Preview) Good morning, In my al-anon meetings the topic of trying to make everything perfect or being perfect has come up once and while. This has really got me thinking. I know that when my Abf was active, I used to try to make things as perfect as possible, so as too not rock the boat to make his drinking wo...	mslouise	7	748	Jul 24, 2008 by Hoot Nanny
	Cant handle my father anymore (Preview) I dont even know where to start. My father has gotten to be such a horrible drunk and theres nothing I can do about it. I moved back home to be some what of a support system for my mother. My father yelled at me last night and told me I was going no where in life and that I was going to turn out just like him. I have a...	PinkTexas	5	691	Jul 24, 2008 by abbyal
	Positive mental attitude (Preview) Thanks to everyone who left me lovely replies to my post earlier on in the week, it really helps me to know my feelings of hate and resentment are natural and not to be ashamed of! In the last few days I've kept hold of the mantra one of you suggested to me: the 3 C's - I didn't cause my mother's addiction, I can...	b	5	438	Jul 24, 2008 by maresie
	All alone with nobody to talk to :( (Preview) Sorry in advance if my first post here is too long or confusing but I'm under alot of stress right now. I've been living with my girlfriend and her 3 kids for about 7 months now. I have a son I get on the weekends too. We've been in a relationship about 3 years. Her kids love me like a father and my son loves h...	offtop	7	691	Jul 24, 2008 by stariana
	A Family Members Passing (Preview) Dear Family, Our Karilynn has lost her hubby.He passed away sober this morning and she has asked for our prayers at this time..	tea2	37	958	Jul 24, 2008 by round3
	hard time with trust (Preview) i am having a hard time trusting my a..an incident happened a while back that keeps popping up in my head...when i confronted her she got really upset...tried to flip it back on me and really just made the whole thing worse she has looked me in the eye before and denied and said it didn't happen but it just k...	charlescharles	5	701	Jul 24, 2008 by Peggy7
	Birthing Lizard....(a little non al-anon funny for everyone) (Preview) _______________________________________________________________________BIRTHING LIZARD If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toil...	JenniferN	2	636	Jul 24, 2008 by Peggy7
	JUST A QUICK QUESTION??? (Preview) My son is the alcoholic and he's on his own struggling in life because he made it that way!! He is living with his friend and his friend's mother and he blew all his money! He called my younger son and told him he was hungry and he had no money to buy food. Well, my younger son is very strong when it comes to hi...	roxygirl	14	807	Jul 23, 2008 by Peggy7
	July Business Meeting Minutes (Preview) July Business Meeting Minutes: MIP Business meeting, held July 13, 2008. Chair opened meeting with the Serenity Prayer 1st thing on agenda was the Secretary's report: Secretary was absent from meeting.Minutes from June business meeting were presented by the chair and were accepted as written by...	david62	0	563	Jul 23, 2008 by david62
	I'm Getting My Social Life Back! (Preview) Friday, my daughter asked me to go to the fair with her and my grandbaby, Delilah, almost 8 months old. We three girls went and had a ball! We ate all kinds of junk, let the baby pat the deer, goats, a kangaroo. My daughter had the baby's and her pic made with a real life lemur. It bit my daughter on the fin...	Becky1	4	729	Jul 22, 2008 by Becky1
	he says, she says (Preview) pieces of a conversation today he (AH) says, she says What are you thinking about? Lots of things like, I don't think of you as shy do you? What? you said that once I know how to be outgoing but sometimes I don't want to be when I am. I see, that makes sense as you seem outgoing. you are random, deep and not fu...	ddub	3	781	Jul 22, 2008 by Jerry F
	can't cope with my mum anymore :'( (Preview) Hi all, I'm 18 and currently living at home with my alcoholic mother and younger brother. My mum's been through the hard work and pain of detox several times, has been admitted to hospital and been told by doctors that she has 2 years to live unless she sticks to being tee-total - which she never does. Thi...	b	8	748	Jul 22, 2008 by MomGayle42
	Still trying to control me.... (Preview) Now that I am living separately from my AH and over the grief and the ripping apart from the sickly familiar, I have really grown to enjoy not being in a relationship with an alcoholic and I am still amazed how blind I was to who he is. It's been almost a month and I am proud of myself and there is no feeling of...	silverbrumby	11	762	Jul 22, 2008 by mokoehn
	AH just started taking Seroquel (Preview) Hi everyone...just to give you an update on my rollercoaster life with my alcoholic husband... as a last resort, he went on his own to see a new psychiatrist last week. My husband has a 10 year history of substance abuse (cocaine, beer)... In the last year, he has been diagnosed with bipolar and hypoma...	jaysbaby	12	875	Jul 22, 2008 by mokoehn
	Offer of a great book... (Preview) Hi everyone... Like many others on here, I am a huge fan of the book series "Getting Them Sober" (particularly volume one), written by Toby Rice Drews. This book is said to be one of THE best resources for those living around active alcoholism. I recently purchased a large quantity of th...	canadianguy	0	6248	Jul 22, 2008 by canadianguy
	Changing a Bad Attitude (Preview) My bff came over yesterday & his job is in jeopardy. For the last 3 months there has been this consultant at his work place observing. Now the hammer has come down. BFF got fired from his last job. His friend got him hired at this place. His friend sounds to me like if he's an addict/alcoholic. If he i...	kitty	4	721	Jul 22, 2008 by CJ
	I Moved, Now He Wants to Stop Drinking! (Preview) I got an apartment, after years of living in an abusive A situation with my husband of almost 8 years. We've been together 11, and then some. He's been yelling he wanted a divorce for years. I withdrew $$$ from my 401K to get a new car after I totaled my other one. I got an apartment, I paid to have all my s...	Becky1	15	742	Jul 21, 2008 by Becky1
	i completely have given up on AH! (Preview) I think I have taken all I can take. I just honestly do not care anymore. He can drink as much as he wants. I no longer say anything, don't care. He's the one to act like the idiot. He's the one people hate being around. He's the one that looks like a fool. I am tired of covering up for him. I just don't c...	desperate for help	12	661	Jul 21, 2008 by maresie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.