Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

debilyn · debilyn

I am in the process of going to dang consultain app.s then preops, then surgery stuff for my torn knee and wrist. Then I have to do a sleep study, then start again for the torn ligament.... Have put all this off too long. Medicare does not pay for it all so my internet will probably disappear for awhile. Ot...

buick23 · buick23

My almost 4 months sober A told me today that he doesn't believe he needs AA and rehab and since he's still sober he thinks that he can do it on his own. I believe the program is keeping him from drinking again. He quit for 2 months a year ago and started drinking again. I've read a lot of posts about stark rav...

charlescharles · charlescharles

i had to dial 911 yesterday after my a came over in a rage..starting screaming and yelling then all broke loose with punches kicks spitting smacking and of course verbal abuse..i was the instigator of the physical when i pushed her...then it just steam roled...she began trashing my place..i dialed...

glad · glad

It helps to come back and read what I and others have previously posted. Perhaps I will get in a better frame of mind by doing so. Today I am "feeling" all this stuff about a disease is just a big fat excuse for people who don't care enough about themselves and those who love them to even try. Toda...

ruthiez · ruthiez

Sometimes I think I'm more comfortable living in denial. It is easier to live as if something isn't going on. However, events are forcing me to face things and to be honest i don't like it. My son is an A and well it is getting to were we can't just ignore his problem Well I probably could but my spouse an...

SmallSteps · SmallSteps

I'm slowly trying to make some changes in my life, some of which involve detatching from some unhealthy situations for a while. I don't want to have too much free time left on my hands to fill with worry and overthinking. I'd rather spend that time doing something enjoy able for myself. I'm thinking it'...

nmike · nmike

I put in an application for a job yesterday. Scarey. I was rejected last time. They reopened the position. I think that I am highly qualified. It would be for more money but I would have to move out of my house, etc. I am trying to stay positive and stay in the moment. What happens, happens. Let's see what ha...

Cherish · Cherish

Hello Everyone! This is my first time on an Al-anon forum - I haven't been to a meeting yet. But will be in the next few days. This is my first step towards changing my life. A little about me... I'm the girlfriend of an alcoholic (14yr relationship). I'm the daughter of an alcoholic and drug addict Father...

ddub · ddub

Here I was plodding along for almost a year in al anon with progress and slips when I feel like I was hit with an emotional storm that I hadn't really experienced. Now I can relate to others some more but yet so much to understand and always more to learn. The positive stress of good things to happen and d...

Codependent · Codependent

I haven't posted in a while. My A is in jail and has been for 6 months. However, he has the possibility of being released in the next month. While he has been incarcerated his "old" normal personality has reemerged from the fogged state it had become. We have had great funny conversation...

Hi everyone, new member. · lildaisy81

Hello everyone. I am new member to this board. I didn't realize that there was a forum out there for this but I'm very happy that I found it. Here is my story: I'm 26 years old and I have a father that is an alcoholic. My whole life he has had a problem and as the years go on, the problem gets worse. He's been to re...

mslouise · mslouise

Good morning, In my al-anon meetings the topic of trying to make everything perfect or being perfect has come up once and while. This has really got me thinking. I know that when my Abf was active, I used to try to make things as perfect as possible, so as too not rock the boat to make his drinking wo...

PinkTexas · PinkTexas

I dont even know where to start. My father has gotten to be such a horrible drunk and theres nothing I can do about it. I moved back home to be some what of a support system for my mother. My father yelled at me last night and told me I was going no where in life and that I was going to turn out just like him. I have a...

maresie · b

Thanks to everyone who left me lovely replies to my post earlier on in the week, it really helps me to know my feelings of hate and resentment are natural and not to be ashamed of! In the last few days I've kept hold of the mantra one of you suggested to me: the 3 C's - I didn't cause my mother's addiction, I can...

offtop · offtop

Sorry in advance if my first post here is too long or confusing but I'm under alot of stress right now. I've been living with my girlfriend and her 3 kids for about 7 months now. I have a son I get on the weekends too. We've been in a relationship about 3 years. Her kids love me like a father and my son loves h...

A Family Members Passing · tea2

Dear Family, Our Karilynn has lost her hubby.He passed away sober this morning and she has asked for our prayers at this time..

charlescharles · charlescharles

i am having a hard time trusting my a..an incident happened a while back that keeps popping up in my head...when i confronted her she got really upset...tried to flip it back on me and really just made the whole thing worse she has looked me in the eye before and denied and said it didn't happen but it just k...

JenniferN · JenniferN

_______________________________________________________________________BIRTHING LIZARD If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toil...

roxygirl · roxygirl

My son is the alcoholic and he's on his own struggling in life because he made it that way!! He is living with his friend and his friend's mother and he blew all his money! He called my younger son and told him he was hungry and he had no money to buy food. Well, my younger son is very strong when it comes to hi...

david62 · david62

July Business Meeting Minutes: MIP Business meeting, held July 13, 2008. Chair opened meeting with the Serenity Prayer 1st thing on agenda was the Secretary's report: Secretary was absent from meeting.Minutes from June business meeting were presented by the chair and were accepted as written by...

Becky1 · Becky1

Friday, my daughter asked me to go to the fair with her and my grandbaby, Delilah, almost 8 months old. We three girls went and had a ball! We ate all kinds of junk, let the baby pat the deer, goats, a kangaroo. My daughter had the baby's and her pic made with a real life lemur. It bit my daughter on the fin...

ddub · ddub

pieces of a conversation today he (AH) says, she says What are you thinking about? Lots of things like, I don't think of you as shy do you? What? you said that once I know how to be outgoing but sometimes I don't want to be when I am. I see, that makes sense as you seem outgoing. you are random, deep and not fu...

MomGayle42 · b

Hi all, I'm 18 and currently living at home with my alcoholic mother and younger brother. My mum's been through the hard work and pain of detox several times, has been admitted to hospital and been told by doctors that she has 2 years to live unless she sticks to being tee-total - which she never does. Thi...

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

Now that I am living separately from my AH and over the grief and the ripping apart from the sickly familiar, I have really grown to enjoy not being in a relationship with an alcoholic and I am still amazed how blind I was to who he is. It's been almost a month and I am proud of myself and there is no feeling of...

jaysbaby · jaysbaby

Hi everyone...just to give you an update on my rollercoaster life with my alcoholic husband... as a last resort, he went on his own to see a new psychiatrist last week. My husband has a 10 year history of substance abuse (cocaine, beer)... In the last year, he has been diagnosed with bipolar and hypoma...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi everyone... Like many others on here, I am a huge fan of the book series "Getting Them Sober" (particularly volume one), written by Toby Rice Drews. This book is said to be one of THE best resources for those living around active alcoholism. I recently purchased a large quantity of th...

kitty · kitty

My bff came over yesterday & his job is in jeopardy. For the last 3 months there has been this consultant at his work place observing. Now the hammer has come down. BFF got fired from his last job. His friend got him hired at this place. His friend sounds to me like if he's an addict/alcoholic. If he i...

Becky1 · Becky1

I got an apartment, after years of living in an abusive A situation with my husband of almost 8 years. We've been together 11, and then some. He's been yelling he wanted a divorce for years. I withdrew $$$ from my 401K to get a new car after I totaled my other one. I got an apartment, I paid to have all my s...

desperate for help · desperate for help

I think I have taken all I can take. I just honestly do not care anymore. He can drink as much as he wants. I no longer say anything, don't care. He's the one to act like the idiot. He's the one people hate being around. He's the one that looks like a fool. I am tired of covering up for him. I just don't c...

david62 · david62

Howdy yall, Got this in an email today and thought I would share it with everyone. Law of the Garbage Truck One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his bra...

Suzannah · Suzannah

...this can sometimes appear to be very slow or even miniscule until one is further along the journey. On looking back to last October, when I first came here as Heartbroken and indeed was heartbroken, now I can see my progress. It is the one step at a time attitude that has brought me thus far; this famil...

Gailey · Gailey

We just purchased a beach home in Bethany Beach, DE this year. I have really been trying to enjoy my summer there. My husband talked me into this particular house that needs cosmetic work. He has always been very handy around the house. I did not want this house because he has been showing signs of depres...

Loupiness · Loupiness

In my detachment from my soon-to-be-ex sober AH, I have learned to just stay silent and walk away when he says something unpleasant. I have now decided that this doesn't always work for me, as it makes me feel resentful and inferior, just adds to my list of "things unsaid". I worked my tail of...

Maria123 · Maria123

The present, the here, the now, that's all the life I get, I live each moment in full, in kindness, in peace, without regret. ~ Chade Meng. Now that's what I am talking about A simple reminder that all I have is now. What am I going to do with the now? So much ESH in this one little sentence makes me gratefu...

kissers · kissers

A lesson I learned recently---"Sometimes bad things happen for good reasons". I have been increasing my boundaries with certain people. I was working at a job where there was a lot of drug activity and pornography. One of my colleagues who is on drugs doesn't understand people's person...

roxygirl · roxygirl

My son is 24 yrs. old and he is an alcoholic! I keep falling for it, keep thinking this is it, he's finally serious and has changed even though he hasn't stopped drinking or gone to AA meetings! I keep thinking he's tired of living at friends houses, partying, never having money and being unstable!! W...

shadow1 · shadow1

((((((((((((Family of choice )))))))))) I just wanted to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers. My son is home from surgery (thought i should clairfy that ) and doing well . I am grateful that I am able to stay home at least for the weekend and be his nurse. Thank you all again!!!!! Yours in Rec...

debilyn · debilyn

AH's phone number says you are connected, but they are not taking calls. She is very ill,cancer. So is she dieing, if so I don't want to lose track of AH only for business reasons. OR he is very ill and dieing,and I need to know this. Business reasons again.Also becuz I care very much. so do i just go knock on...

joyoma · joyoma

I have hours and nanoseconds where I think: I simply cannot deal with life as I now have it. I cannot stand it. Then something kicks in and I realize, short of being self-destructive, I have no choice but to stand it. News like I have recently had following my surgery....sarcoma of the lung....is dev...

mo14 · mo14

Hi all Well it has come to this after alot of soul searching...I am moving out next Friday and will be on my own with my three small kids. I tried everything I begged I pleaded and I finally realized i cannot control my A the only person I have control over is myself. I pray someway we can mend the road we hav...

charlescharles · charlescharles

good to be back home again..spent the day at the beach with a friend and his family hit up the ocean..nice my girl called from detroit..she was high..drunk..whatever..felt the nasty energy..phone call was quick don't need her calling whem shes high...or for that matter ever someone said i don't per...

charlescharles · charlescharles

just a quick check up..feeling a bit out of sorts..my a went away for the weekend..hurah..i think she will be back on monday..i say good riddence to her right now this is how i feel hung out with my friend today but was reminded about people from my past and even giving myself away my co dependent nature.....

JenniferN · JenniferN

I want to sincerely thank all of you who shared your esh in my earlier post. I have clamed down and thought about all of it and read the replies a couple of times now and realize that I had a "relapse" I will turn my focus back to ME and MY recovery where it belongs and dive into some CAL. again, than...

maire rua · maire rua

Thanks Jean4444 for your post the other day, it made me think. I will alway rescue animals but have pulled out of two situations in the last 24 hours that I would not have done so had I not read and absorbed the post. The first was when dealing with someone who did not realise my business worth and was minim...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Honey, I'm home! As some of you may already know, my A hubby works offshore and is home for 7 and at work for 7. The light at the end of the tunnel for me for the last 10 years has been that his 7 days home won't be long and he'll be gone soon. In the beginning, I would look forward to his returning home. Soon af...

shadow1 · shadow1

(((((((((((Everyone))))))))) My oldest son Kyle is having surgery tomorrow, (Friday) and I would appreciate it if you could please add him to your prayers. Its not major but it is still surgery. Thanks Shad

RLC · RLC

Hello All, I have always taken a little pride (not always a good thing) in the fact that I have "NEVER" been late to one of our Al-Anon meetings, and I go twice a week for the past two years. Sometimes members will drag in 5 minutes or so late, not me I'm always there 15 or 20 minutes early to...

AJ · AJ

It's been 8 weeks since my AH and I separated. I've been attending f2f Al-Anon meetings since - wonderful stuff there, and posting here - what a blessing! Today's brief visit with my AH went okay. He wasn't drunk during our visit. I could still smell the alcohol on his breath from last night's binge. My...

JenniferN · JenniferN

I've been wondering lately where that fine line between detachment with love and taking care of someone you love lies. I know not to take care of things he can obviously do on his own: like getting up in the morning, cooking, making appointments things like that. But I guess I'm having difficulty with t...

Totally Heartbroken · Totally Heartbroken

My AH was doing pretty good for the last several months.I noticed he was sneaking drinks again here and there but it wasn't bad.Then I went away to camp for a week and came home to a nightmare. He is in full blown again.I talked to a good friend of his who is suggesting an intervention. Here is where it gets c...

Christy · Christy

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOUPINESS!!! I know we're not to give advice, let alone an order but...... You have a wonderful day!! That's an order!!!! Christy

Suzannah · Suzannah

...if that is the case then I need to make sure that my humility is true humility and not false humility. Being in control of my attitude means, for me at least, knowing what is in my mind and in my heart. My behaviour is what reveals my attitude for it shows what is in my mind and in my heart. That being the ca...

partlycloudy1 · partlycloudy1

Which was preceded by my first ever chat on the Alanon forum. What can I say? It all feels like I put on a new pair of shoes and I'm Cinderella, that's what. It fits like a dream. It's comfortable, it's comforting, and best of all, I was on the cusp before the meeting of the relief that was swift in coming...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Where I live, a law has recently been passed that cell phones must be hands-free when you are driving. I find it silly only in that dialing and texting are still okay. Huh? Anyhow, I lost my bluetooth device (that I had since Dec) about a week after the law came into effect and I haven't bought a new one ye...

maresie · maresie

As you all know I have been going out on dates. Recently I met three men, one an alcoholic in recovery (he has long term recovery), the others two different men. Guess who I feel most comfortable with? The recovering alcohoic has numerous red flags, smokes (I am asthmatic and really allergic to smoke...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Interesting... just 5 years ago I would have said that alcoholism or alcohol in general, had no impact on my life. Now, even though I am not engulfed in the active part of it, I feel surrounded. My brother is also an A in my life. Just a few years ago, he had a wonderful intact family. Now my sis-in-law is s...

angel123 · angel123

Sounds of the wild Consumes me Able to hear there whisper There calling There protection of there home Even a pea cock calling Sounding like a women calling for HELP !HELP! A wood pecker going at a tree To find his feed Robins bob bob bobbing along The surface of the ground I walk on to find there feed I once...

MayDay · MayDay

Hello everyone- I was looking over the other posts as I was debating (and have been for several months) whether to even join as a member, let alone post anything. I definitely found that I share all to well similar feelings. I come from a home where my mother was addicted to pain killers my entire life (st...

joyoma · joyoma

My surgery went without a hitch on Monday. By Tuesday I was up walking and by that afternoon had my chest tube removed. I came home today. So all went well...except that the nodule on my lung was indeed a malignant sarcoma. It was a mestasis from the primary leg tumor of last year. The standard treatme...

SmallSteps · SmallSteps

After going to a meeting, doing a little reading, taking inventory of my past relationships, and getting a few drunken phone calls this week, I think I'm ready to admit that the people I'm having trouble with currently are in fact alcoholics. I've also realized that all but one of the people I've been i...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	fyi (Preview) I am in the process of going to dang consultain app.s then preops, then surgery stuff for my torn knee and wrist. Then I have to do a sleep study, then start again for the torn ligament.... Have put all this off too long. Medicare does not pay for it all so my internet will probably disappear for awhile. Ot...	debilyn	7	566	Jul 25, 2008 by debilyn
	In denial after getting sober? (Preview) My almost 4 months sober A told me today that he doesn't believe he needs AA and rehab and since he's still sober he thinks that he can do it on his own. I believe the program is keeping him from drinking again. He quit for 2 months a year ago and started drinking again. I've read a lot of posts about stark rav...	buick23	7	752	Jul 25, 2008 by Jerry F
	it hit the fan (Preview) i had to dial 911 yesterday after my a came over in a rage..starting screaming and yelling then all broke loose with punches kicks spitting smacking and of course verbal abuse..i was the instigator of the physical when i pushed her...then it just steam roled...she began trashing my place..i dialed...	charlescharles	14	817	Jul 25, 2008 by kitty
	Little mouse feels some sadness... (Preview) It helps to come back and read what I and others have previously posted. Perhaps I will get in a better frame of mind by doing so. Today I am "feeling" all this stuff about a disease is just a big fat excuse for people who don't care enough about themselves and those who love them to even try. Toda...	glad	3	737	Jul 25, 2008 by round3
	Uncomfortable (Preview) Sometimes I think I'm more comfortable living in denial. It is easier to live as if something isn't going on. However, events are forcing me to face things and to be honest i don't like it. My son is an A and well it is getting to were we can't just ignore his problem Well I probably could but my spouse an...	ruthiez	7	564	Jul 25, 2008 by Mommaceda
	I want to find things in my community to get involved in... (Preview) I'm slowly trying to make some changes in my life, some of which involve detatching from some unhealthy situations for a while. I don't want to have too much free time left on my hands to fill with worry and overthinking. I'd rather spend that time doing something enjoy able for myself. I'm thinking it'...	SmallSteps	9	625	Jul 25, 2008 by Jean4444
	Applied for another job (Preview) I put in an application for a job yesterday. Scarey. I was rejected last time. They reopened the position. I think that I am highly qualified. It would be for more money but I would have to move out of my house, etc. I am trying to stay positive and stay in the moment. What happens, happens. Let's see what ha...	nmike	7	552	Jul 25, 2008 by Jean4444
	Hi Everyone. I'm New Here... (Preview) Hello Everyone! This is my first time on an Al-anon forum - I haven't been to a meeting yet. But will be in the next few days. This is my first step towards changing my life. A little about me... I'm the girlfriend of an alcoholic (14yr relationship). I'm the daughter of an alcoholic and drug addict Father...	Cherish	8	534	Jul 24, 2008 by theresawebb14
	conflicting emotions (Preview) Here I was plodding along for almost a year in al anon with progress and slips when I feel like I was hit with an emotional storm that I hadn't really experienced. Now I can relate to others some more but yet so much to understand and always more to learn. The positive stress of good things to happen and d...	ddub	4	480	Jul 24, 2008 by nmike
	Incarceration (Preview) I haven't posted in a while. My A is in jail and has been for 6 months. However, he has the possibility of being released in the next month. While he has been incarcerated his "old" normal personality has reemerged from the fogged state it had become. We have had great funny conversation...	Codependent	6	442	Jul 24, 2008 by abbyal
	Hi everyone, new member. (Preview) Hello everyone. I am new member to this board. I didn't realize that there was a forum out there for this but I'm very happy that I found it. Here is my story: I'm 26 years old and I have a father that is an alcoholic. My whole life he has had a problem and as the years go on, the problem gets worse. He's been to re...	lildaisy81	4	562	Jul 24, 2008 by danz123
	2 parts - Having everything perfect & pms ? (Preview) Good morning, In my al-anon meetings the topic of trying to make everything perfect or being perfect has come up once and while. This has really got me thinking. I know that when my Abf was active, I used to try to make things as perfect as possible, so as too not rock the boat to make his drinking wo...	mslouise	7	688	Jul 24, 2008 by Hoot Nanny
	Cant handle my father anymore (Preview) I dont even know where to start. My father has gotten to be such a horrible drunk and theres nothing I can do about it. I moved back home to be some what of a support system for my mother. My father yelled at me last night and told me I was going no where in life and that I was going to turn out just like him. I have a...	PinkTexas	5	631	Jul 24, 2008 by abbyal
	Positive mental attitude (Preview) Thanks to everyone who left me lovely replies to my post earlier on in the week, it really helps me to know my feelings of hate and resentment are natural and not to be ashamed of! In the last few days I've kept hold of the mantra one of you suggested to me: the 3 C's - I didn't cause my mother's addiction, I can...	b	5	376	Jul 24, 2008 by maresie
	All alone with nobody to talk to :( (Preview) Sorry in advance if my first post here is too long or confusing but I'm under alot of stress right now. I've been living with my girlfriend and her 3 kids for about 7 months now. I have a son I get on the weekends too. We've been in a relationship about 3 years. Her kids love me like a father and my son loves h...	offtop	7	631	Jul 24, 2008 by stariana
	A Family Members Passing (Preview) Dear Family, Our Karilynn has lost her hubby.He passed away sober this morning and she has asked for our prayers at this time..	tea2	37	893	Jul 24, 2008 by round3
	hard time with trust (Preview) i am having a hard time trusting my a..an incident happened a while back that keeps popping up in my head...when i confronted her she got really upset...tried to flip it back on me and really just made the whole thing worse she has looked me in the eye before and denied and said it didn't happen but it just k...	charlescharles	5	639	Jul 24, 2008 by Peggy7
	Birthing Lizard....(a little non al-anon funny for everyone) (Preview) _______________________________________________________________________BIRTHING LIZARD If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toil...	JenniferN	2	578	Jul 24, 2008 by Peggy7
	JUST A QUICK QUESTION??? (Preview) My son is the alcoholic and he's on his own struggling in life because he made it that way!! He is living with his friend and his friend's mother and he blew all his money! He called my younger son and told him he was hungry and he had no money to buy food. Well, my younger son is very strong when it comes to hi...	roxygirl	14	745	Jul 23, 2008 by Peggy7
	July Business Meeting Minutes (Preview) July Business Meeting Minutes: MIP Business meeting, held July 13, 2008. Chair opened meeting with the Serenity Prayer 1st thing on agenda was the Secretary's report: Secretary was absent from meeting.Minutes from June business meeting were presented by the chair and were accepted as written by...	david62	0	497	Jul 23, 2008 by david62
	I'm Getting My Social Life Back! (Preview) Friday, my daughter asked me to go to the fair with her and my grandbaby, Delilah, almost 8 months old. We three girls went and had a ball! We ate all kinds of junk, let the baby pat the deer, goats, a kangaroo. My daughter had the baby's and her pic made with a real life lemur. It bit my daughter on the fin...	Becky1	4	668	Jul 22, 2008 by Becky1
	he says, she says (Preview) pieces of a conversation today he (AH) says, she says What are you thinking about? Lots of things like, I don't think of you as shy do you? What? you said that once I know how to be outgoing but sometimes I don't want to be when I am. I see, that makes sense as you seem outgoing. you are random, deep and not fu...	ddub	3	721	Jul 22, 2008 by Jerry F
	can't cope with my mum anymore :'( (Preview) Hi all, I'm 18 and currently living at home with my alcoholic mother and younger brother. My mum's been through the hard work and pain of detox several times, has been admitted to hospital and been told by doctors that she has 2 years to live unless she sticks to being tee-total - which she never does. Thi...	b	8	692	Jul 22, 2008 by MomGayle42
	Still trying to control me.... (Preview) Now that I am living separately from my AH and over the grief and the ripping apart from the sickly familiar, I have really grown to enjoy not being in a relationship with an alcoholic and I am still amazed how blind I was to who he is. It's been almost a month and I am proud of myself and there is no feeling of...	silverbrumby	11	705	Jul 22, 2008 by mokoehn
	AH just started taking Seroquel (Preview) Hi everyone...just to give you an update on my rollercoaster life with my alcoholic husband... as a last resort, he went on his own to see a new psychiatrist last week. My husband has a 10 year history of substance abuse (cocaine, beer)... In the last year, he has been diagnosed with bipolar and hypoma...	jaysbaby	12	785	Jul 22, 2008 by mokoehn
	Offer of a great book... (Preview) Hi everyone... Like many others on here, I am a huge fan of the book series "Getting Them Sober" (particularly volume one), written by Toby Rice Drews. This book is said to be one of THE best resources for those living around active alcoholism. I recently purchased a large quantity of th...	canadianguy	0	6022	Jul 22, 2008 by canadianguy
	Changing a Bad Attitude (Preview) My bff came over yesterday & his job is in jeopardy. For the last 3 months there has been this consultant at his work place observing. Now the hammer has come down. BFF got fired from his last job. His friend got him hired at this place. His friend sounds to me like if he's an addict/alcoholic. If he i...	kitty	4	659	Jul 22, 2008 by CJ
	I Moved, Now He Wants to Stop Drinking! (Preview) I got an apartment, after years of living in an abusive A situation with my husband of almost 8 years. We've been together 11, and then some. He's been yelling he wanted a divorce for years. I withdrew $$$ from my 401K to get a new car after I totaled my other one. I got an apartment, I paid to have all my s...	Becky1	15	676	Jul 21, 2008 by Becky1
	i completely have given up on AH! (Preview) I think I have taken all I can take. I just honestly do not care anymore. He can drink as much as he wants. I no longer say anything, don't care. He's the one to act like the idiot. He's the one people hate being around. He's the one that looks like a fool. I am tired of covering up for him. I just don't c...	desperate for help	12	599	Jul 21, 2008 by maresie
	Law of the Garbage Truck (Preview) Howdy yall, Got this in an email today and thought I would share it with everyone. Law of the Garbage Truck One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his bra...	david62	7	703	Jul 21, 2008 by norwood
	Progress...if you don't think that you are making progress, please read my testimony to the truth. (Preview) ...this can sometimes appear to be very slow or even miniscule until one is further along the journey. On looking back to last October, when I first came here as Heartbroken and indeed was heartbroken, now I can see my progress. It is the one step at a time attitude that has brought me thus far; this famil...	Suzannah	7	647	Jul 21, 2008 by norwood
	just needing to vent (Preview) We just purchased a beach home in Bethany Beach, DE this year. I have really been trying to enjoy my summer there. My husband talked me into this particular house that needs cosmetic work. He has always been very handy around the house. I did not want this house because he has been showing signs of depres...	Gailey	2	571	Jul 21, 2008 by abbyal
	Don't Tread On Me! (Preview) In my detachment from my soon-to-be-ex sober AH, I have learned to just stay silent and walk away when he says something unpleasant. I have now decided that this doesn't always work for me, as it makes me feel resentful and inferior, just adds to my list of "things unsaid". I worked my tail of...	Loupiness	4	632	Jul 21, 2008 by debilyn
	Today's Spirituality (Preview) The present, the here, the now, that's all the life I get, I live each moment in full, in kindness, in peace, without regret. ~ Chade Meng. Now that's what I am talking about A simple reminder that all I have is now. What am I going to do with the now? So much ESH in this one little sentence makes me gratefu...	Maria123	3	358	Jul 21, 2008 by Mandy123
	It's been a while (Preview) A lesson I learned recently---"Sometimes bad things happen for good reasons". I have been increasing my boundaries with certain people. I was working at a job where there was a lot of drug activity and pornography. One of my colleagues who is on drugs doesn't understand people's person...	kissers	5	560	Jul 21, 2008 by maresie
	WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME? (Preview) My son is 24 yrs. old and he is an alcoholic! I keep falling for it, keep thinking this is it, he's finally serious and has changed even though he hasn't stopped drinking or gone to AA meetings! I keep thinking he's tired of living at friends houses, partying, never having money and being unstable!! W...	roxygirl	9	814	Jul 21, 2008 by Minnehaha
	Son is home and doing well (Preview) ((((((((((((Family of choice )))))))))) I just wanted to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers. My son is home from surgery (thought i should clairfy that ) and doing well . I am grateful that I am able to stay home at least for the weekend and be his nurse. Thank you all again!!!!! Yours in Rec...	shadow1	7	698	Jul 21, 2008 by Karilynn
	Please, I need your esh (Preview) AH's phone number says you are connected, but they are not taking calls. She is very ill,cancer. So is she dieing, if so I don't want to lose track of AH only for business reasons. OR he is very ill and dieing,and I need to know this. Business reasons again.Also becuz I care very much. so do i just go knock on...	debilyn	9	703	Jul 20, 2008 by lin0606
	coping with it all (Preview) I have hours and nanoseconds where I think: I simply cannot deal with life as I now have it. I cannot stand it. Then something kicks in and I realize, short of being self-destructive, I have no choice but to stand it. News like I have recently had following my surgery....sarcoma of the lung....is dev...	joyoma	5	590	Jul 20, 2008 by lin0606
	Next Friday is the day (Preview) Hi all Well it has come to this after alot of soul searching...I am moving out next Friday and will be on my own with my three small kids. I tried everything I begged I pleaded and I finally realized i cannot control my A the only person I have control over is myself. I pray someway we can mend the road we hav...	mo14	6	687	Jul 20, 2008 by Maria123
	more stuff (Preview) good to be back home again..spent the day at the beach with a friend and his family hit up the ocean..nice my girl called from detroit..she was high..drunk..whatever..felt the nasty energy..phone call was quick don't need her calling whem shes high...or for that matter ever someone said i don't per...	charlescharles	0	314	Jul 19, 2008 by charlescharles
	hey (Preview) just a quick check up..feeling a bit out of sorts..my a went away for the weekend..hurah..i think she will be back on monday..i say good riddence to her right now this is how i feel hung out with my friend today but was reminded about people from my past and even giving myself away my co dependent nature.....	charlescharles	3	336	Jul 19, 2008 by lin0606
	Seeing What You All Are Saying (Preview) I want to sincerely thank all of you who shared your esh in my earlier post. I have clamed down and thought about all of it and read the replies a couple of times now and realize that I had a "relapse" I will turn my focus back to ME and MY recovery where it belongs and dive into some CAL. again, than...	JenniferN	2	463	Jul 19, 2008 by nmike
	Refusing to rescue (Preview) Thanks Jean4444 for your post the other day, it made me think. I will alway rescue animals but have pulled out of two situations in the last 24 hours that I would not have done so had I not read and absorbed the post. The first was when dealing with someone who did not realise my business worth and was minim...	maire rua	2	414	Jul 19, 2008 by kitty
	Honey, I'm home! (Preview) Honey, I'm home! As some of you may already know, my A hubby works offshore and is home for 7 and at work for 7. The light at the end of the tunnel for me for the last 10 years has been that his 7 days home won't be long and he'll be gone soon. In the beginning, I would look forward to his returning home. Soon af...	Sincerely	4	468	Jul 19, 2008 by Sincerely
	Prayer Request Please (Preview) (((((((((((Everyone))))))))) My oldest son Kyle is having surgery tomorrow, (Friday) and I would appreciate it if you could please add him to your prayers. Its not major but it is still surgery. Thanks Shad	shadow1	9	447	Jul 19, 2008 by Maria123
	I Have A Confesion To Make (Preview) Hello All, I have always taken a little pride (not always a good thing) in the fact that I have "NEVER" been late to one of our Al-Anon meetings, and I go twice a week for the past two years. Sometimes members will drag in 5 minutes or so late, not me I'm always there 15 or 20 minutes early to...	RLC	7	747	Jul 19, 2008 by Maria123
	Had a visit with my AH (Preview) It's been 8 weeks since my AH and I separated. I've been attending f2f Al-Anon meetings since - wonderful stuff there, and posting here - what a blessing! Today's brief visit with my AH went okay. He wasn't drunk during our visit. I could still smell the alcohol on his breath from last night's binge. My...	AJ	4	615	Jul 18, 2008 by AJ
	Question About Detachment (Preview) I've been wondering lately where that fine line between detachment with love and taking care of someone you love lies. I know not to take care of things he can obviously do on his own: like getting up in the morning, cooking, making appointments things like that. But I guess I'm having difficulty with t...	JenniferN	10	520	Jul 18, 2008 by AJ
	Intervention success? (Preview) My AH was doing pretty good for the last several months.I noticed he was sneaking drinks again here and there but it wasn't bad.Then I went away to camp for a week and came home to a nightmare. He is in full blown again.I talked to a good friend of his who is suggesting an intervention. Here is where it gets c...	Totally Heartbroken	10	561	Jul 18, 2008 by AJ
	HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! (Preview) HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOUPINESS!!! I know we're not to give advice, let alone an order but...... You have a wonderful day!! That's an order!!!! Christy	Christy	10	535	Jul 18, 2008 by Loupiness
	Gratitude leads to humility...so I am told... (Preview) ...if that is the case then I need to make sure that my humility is true humility and not false humility. Being in control of my attitude means, for me at least, knowing what is in my mind and in my heart. My behaviour is what reveals my attitude for it shows what is in my mind and in my heart. That being the ca...	Suzannah	6	433	Jul 18, 2008 by Jerry F
	A report back from my first ever Alanon meeting (long) (Preview) Which was preceded by my first ever chat on the Alanon forum. What can I say? It all feels like I put on a new pair of shoes and I'm Cinderella, that's what. It fits like a dream. It's comfortable, it's comforting, and best of all, I was on the cusp before the meeting of the relief that was swift in coming...	partlycloudy1	10	630	Jul 18, 2008 by partlycloudy1
	I'm not as important as I think I am... (Preview) Where I live, a law has recently been passed that cell phones must be hands-free when you are driving. I find it silly only in that dialing and texting are still okay. Huh? Anyhow, I lost my bluetooth device (that I had since Dec) about a week after the law came into effect and I haven't bought a new one ye...	Loupiness	6	675	Jul 18, 2008 by Minnehaha
	dating in recovery (Preview) As you all know I have been going out on dates. Recently I met three men, one an alcoholic in recovery (he has long term recovery), the others two different men. Guess who I feel most comfortable with? The recovering alcohoic has numerous red flags, smokes (I am asthmatic and really allergic to smoke...	maresie	17	569	Jul 18, 2008 by maresie
	when is it okay to move on? (Preview) Interesting... just 5 years ago I would have said that alcoholism or alcohol in general, had no impact on my life. Now, even though I am not engulfed in the active part of it, I feel surrounded. My brother is also an A in my life. Just a few years ago, he had a wonderful intact family. Now my sis-in-law is s...	Loupiness	10	679	Jul 18, 2008 by Diva
	Sounds of the wild (Preview) Sounds of the wild Consumes me Able to hear there whisper There calling There protection of there home Even a pea cock calling Sounding like a women calling for HELP !HELP! A wood pecker going at a tree To find his feed Robins bob bob bobbing along The surface of the ground I walk on to find there feed I once...	angel123	0	383	Jul 18, 2008 by angel123
	Hey...I am new (Preview) Hello everyone- I was looking over the other posts as I was debating (and have been for several months) whether to even join as a member, let alone post anything. I definitely found that I share all to well similar feelings. I come from a home where my mother was addicted to pain killers my entire life (st...	MayDay	6	462	Jul 18, 2008 by angel66
	surgery over (Preview) My surgery went without a hitch on Monday. By Tuesday I was up walking and by that afternoon had my chest tube removed. I came home today. So all went well...except that the nodule on my lung was indeed a malignant sarcoma. It was a mestasis from the primary leg tumor of last year. The standard treatme...	joyoma	13	579	Jul 17, 2008 by Loupiness
	Ok, I'm ready to admit it... (Preview) After going to a meeting, doing a little reading, taking inventory of my past relationships, and getting a few drunken phone calls this week, I think I'm ready to admit that the people I'm having trouble with currently are in fact alcoholics. I've also realized that all but one of the people I've been i...	SmallSteps	7	611	Jul 17, 2008 by SmallSteps
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.