Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Codependent · Codependent

So, I'm not sure if I ever posted that the A is actually gonna be living in Florida after rehab. So that adds another dimension to our relationship. My therapist thinks I should completely cut off the relationship as he had pictures of his ex from 6 years ago out before he left for rehab and maybe he is on...

maresie · maresie

Six months ago I had a check stolen and to date I still have not had it replaced. I have no idea who took the check but have an idea it was someone with an active addiciton who took an opportunity and ran with it. Someday I may know I don't hold out for that information anymore. I do know its been months of ph...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I woke up this morning, and have an upset tummy and a bit of what usually comes with that. Also, my hands are a bit shaky - so I just don't feel 'right' physically. Might this be from trying to not react and change how I respond? I honestly don't know if I am getting sick or if my body is speaking to me in anoth...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

My husband has been in jail for almost 2 weeks now and I feel like I've seen him and talked to him ore these past 2 weeks than I have the past 2 months. He calls every day and now that he's doing his work-release, he want us to visit him at work. Also, he just ran into a little road block where he can't drive to/...

Sangyaa · Sangyaa

My addict boyfriend, who I live with and have been through everything with this past year, pawned everything of value I own yesterday, intending to go on a heroin binge. I got home, found it all gone, him with it, and a cocky little note- "Sorry babe, love ya". After months of skirting the iss...

RSFleishm · RSFleishm

I am not sure if I am posting in the right area as I am new to this website but I hope that someone might be able to give me some direction as to where to go or some advice as to what I should do. My father in law is a recovering alcoholic and has been sober since before I knew him (about 5 years). We just found out l...

miss lucy · miss lucy

Well my AH never ceases to amaze me.... we had a really great day today. although still living apart we are communicating well and meeting up occassionally so that i can help him with form filling etc (this is part of our separation agreement and i am ok with that because of his illiteracy). Any way......

Peggy7 · Peggy7

How To Plant Your Garden FOR THE GARDEN OF YOUR DAILY LIVING,PLANT THREE ROWS OF PEAS: 1. Peace of mind 2. Peace of heart 3. Peace of soul PLANT FOUR ROWS OF SQUASH: 1. Squash gossip 2. Squash indifference 3. Squash grumbling 4. Squash selfishness PLANT FOUR ROWS OF LETTUCE: 1. Lettuce be faithfu...

Codependent · Codependent

It seems at work that I have a tendency to step in when I see things going wrong that I step up and take care of it- often into other people's departments-particularly nursing. However, i am a social worker and as a patient advocate this does go to part of my job description. Needless to say this does not...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Well dear family, Just when I thought I was doing so well this winter I am hit with a really toughie. I have shingles and it is quite bad. So, my immune system is not what it should be regardless of staying away from the steroids since May of last year. Feeling pretty poorly and so it is a bit of a down hill str...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

My husband is serving 45 days in jail for a DUI - he is on a work-release program. He can drive himself to/from work. Unfortunately he just found out that they may not let him do that because the DMV has started the process to suspend his driver's license. A lot of people in jail take the bus to/from work, b...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

WOW! I wish there was an icon for smacking my head, since that is what I am doing right now! LOL! I guess now I know why people say alanoners also have relapses, because I just had a HUGE one!!! What was I doing going by what my A says about AA anyway? I have never been to an AA meeting, I should have NEVER let...

pineapple · pineapple

<!-- /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-fami...

Ferny · Ferny

Long time browser, first time poster. I guess I just need any advice or comfort that people throw at me. Background on me: never had personal experience with alcoholism until now, except in distant and dead relatives. I recently became engaged to a very nice man. We are very compatible in basic valu...

bessie · bessie

This is my first attempt to seek out advice on what I've known has been a problem for several years now. My brother, who lives in Las Vegas (I am in NY), and who has been in a relationship for over 30 years, has been drinking regularly and more and more heavily. His partner asked me for help a little over a y...

intothewoods · intothewoods

I discovered a new term! "gas lighting" or one word, "gaslighting". (from Wikipedia) "Gaslighting is a form of intimidation or psychological abuse in which false information is presented to the victim, making them doubt their own memory and perception. The classic e...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hey all: OK - so took me a bit to process my yesterday. I'll try to keep it simple, but in a nut-shell this was my yesterday. Started out 'great'. Took my oldest to his therapy appointment @ 8:15am, and we had time to stop for coffee. He viewed that as a treat, I viewed it as a necessity. Anyhow, he's soon t...

powerlessmom · powerlessmom

My daughter, Christina was diagnosed with Bipolar/borderline personality at age 11 and she is now 25. She struggles with depression, alcohol abuse (binge drinking) and an eating disorder. Currently, she is on medication and her eating disorder is now under control but that is when alcohol is the...

RLC · RLC

Some days we need a little humor, and some jokes can make a point that we can relate to our program. To me this joke is another reminder to "Not React". I hope you enjoy it, and take it in the spirit is is intended. A woman complains to her therapist about fights and arguments between she and he...

Rora · Rora

For many years married to my exaH I complained about his complete lack of taking responsibility for himself. I am learning more and more about how my manipulation and control tactics and refusal to accept my reality, was ME not taking responsibility for MYSELF. I have not been unaware to my unhappy m...

bioteach · bioteach

my daughter is in recovery and has found peace ... my struggle for acceptwnce and giving all of my control to GOD STILL is an issue .... please give me insight on how to find peace...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I spent the day yesterday cleaning out my computer room. I shredded years worth of financial documents, and cleaned out cabinets full of not-my-stuff. Much belonging to my exAH, I just piled it up and now need a big box! Considered tossing/shredding the nonessentials, but only hung onto that tho...

SheWolf · SheWolf

I really need to vent about some things and I hope that you don't mind. My A has finished his treatment 2 weeks ago, but is now out of province with his parents due to legal conditions (which should be removed this week or next). We had several conversations about him coming home. He stated how scared he i...

Carol_Lynn · Carol_Lynn

I am trying to work thru this maze of dealing with my girlfriend now. I've been counseled to hang in there with her. I really want to, but I am afraid, so afraid. I feel compelled to open up to her as she asks me to. She can tell that I am avoiding her. My therapist can tell. But I am so afraid. I got close to her la...

bioteach · bioteach

so acceptant of God and his palns for her and I am so so distrustful, praranoid ... not so much of her .... but my lack of control in most of life's problems ...... where do I turn .. what do I do>???

Ness · Ness

Hi folksI posted a couple of days ago.....What would you do (regarding giving our son a replacement phone)....and you all reinforced what I knew would be my (read on!) decision. Yesterday husb asked when we were going to send Ason the phone........aaaarrrrrrghhh!! I explained I had been giving i...

Ness · Ness

Hi All.....Im stuck with what to doAson, at Christmas, had his phone stolen out his pocket while he lay in a drink induced slumber I have a pay-plan on my mobile phone which means me, husb, daughter and Ason get free calls between us all.I have an old phone I could add to the pay-plan that I could give him,...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Just keep thinking about you and wondering how you are doing now? Kept up with your situation. Such a hard time. I keep ya in my prayers and thoughts. Do you feel like updating us? Spill it pretty lady, I have seen her, she is beautiful! love,debilyn

blender_girl · blender_girl

Background: My AH and I separated under less than optimal circumstances this past October. He is now living with a friend of his and we are going through the process of divorce. This has been a real rollercoaster ride for all of us. My 9 year old son and I are back in the house and we were able to quickly st...

Sam72 · Sam72

HI, Just wondering if it is possible to close your own topic? Or does someone else do it? Thanx

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Family, hope you're all feeling great. Just wanted to share the slogan that we did our morning meeting on. I reflected on when I got here and when I took the suggestions to learn, memorize and practice the slogans. I also remember "gettin it" on "keep it simple" as a pra...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So it's been whirlwind lately and I have craziness on top of craziness. The ex finally left yesterday to go to California to live with the next ex/new girlfriend. Maybe this one can save him? I'm being facetious of course. She's very nice and tolerant so maybe it'll last for a bit. My oldest daughter...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Ok family I have had a couple of rough days with some shinny spots. My son got a dui last week he is already on very supervised probation. Following the DUI (which I knew nothing about at the time) I answered the door in my jammies and here was his PO. They asked if he was here and I looked over to see if h...

Debilyn · Debilyn

http://africantortoise.com/gallery2/main.php?g2_navId=x475d1134

Codependent · Codependent

I do enjoy talking to him from rehab and he has asked me to come see him, but admitting that I am powerless over my feelings for him and that he does not feel that way toward me....I am thinking that means no calls and no visits....do I have to broach this via phone or do you think a text is just way too chicken t...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hello to all and I'm very grateful I found you! My story is not unique at all but I'm having a very difficult time channeling the chatter in my head and aligning that with my heart. I am fortunate (or not) to qualify for this program as well as AA. I found AA in 1985, and have been blessed with 24 years clean a...

pineapple · pineapple

This is a jump off from another post about enabling. This has been tough for me to figure out. Am I helping or enabling? I often don't know. But Jerry posted a reply to that thread which made such sense to me. I wish I had figured it out by myself. He said ¨What I learned was If the person lacked the time, abil...

Caton · Caton

Hello all! I'm new to this forum. I am 23 years old and have been living with an alcoholic mother my whole life. She has been abusive both verbally and mentally. I am in college so I only see her in the summer and during vacations but I have so much anger towards her and what she did to me that I find it hard to ta...

maire rua · maire rua

Sometime ago I told you that I had taken my step mother's dog. I had misgivings at the time, but my A father was cruel to the dog and she was not getting out from under an old sideboard in the sitting room. I have no regrets for taking her. She has brought such joy to my life, she stopped losing her hair, I think...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((((((((Hello Friends)))))))), I have had a couple of rough days lately for some reason my husband has been on my mind alot.....as I watch my daughter take her journey in life...I am so proud of her..she is a wonderful mom....going to college full time and working a part time job..she has made so muc...

miss lucy · miss lucy

I never had a particularly good self image. Sure i can put makeup on and dress nicely. Other people have said I am pretty, got lovely eyes etc. but I never believed any of it I've just been watching a re-run of one of Gok Wan's how to look good naked programmes. He was helping a lady, who had been through...

3littlekittens · 3littlekittens

Hi all-- My AH moved out finally Dec 31 and quite honestly, my life has been full of peace, serenity, independence, and in a word: bliss. I am sleeping, my eating is under control, I am more focused, I'm tons more productive at home, and most importantly I feel more connected to and more patient with my ch...

maresie · maresie

I am tryng to change my attitude from "its not fair", "poor me" to accepting what is my lot today. I know it is far far better than it was 3 years ago. My reflex thoughts are always its not fair and poor me so I have to take it second by second and I am finding it very hard going. No wonder...

miss lucy · miss lucy

AH is seriously testing my patience today....non stop text messages...indirect messages through other people....questions, questions, questions! of course i haven't let him know he is getting to me...i haven't entered into the arguement he is trying to cause....i haven't even answered his...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Retired from rescuing the big kids, horses, llamas, pigs huge and small. BUT have always wanted a tortoise in my life. So an opportunity came up to rescue one. He is only about a hundred pounds now, lives in my living room. lol I was going to make a bedroom just for him but decided heck with that, I don't wa...

Samsgram · Samsgram

I know my daughter is an A and I`am trying not to engage in any more arguments with her. I really only want to talk to her about my grandaughter who she has custody of. This 6 year old has heard us have many an argument but mostly sees her mother scream and rage. Over X-mass I heard my daughter call me the filth...

Suzi1965 · Suzi1965

I just wanted to share the changes I have gone through since starting to work my program. I am really taking the idea of taking care of me seriously. I have gone to a Dr. and had a full check up, which doesnt sound like much but the thought of doing that always scared me before..(better not to know type thin...

kerry5 · kerry5

Hey Christy!!!! Just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday :) Hope its a good one for you!! ((((((((hugs))))))))) Kerry

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hey all: I'm sitting here, tears and all trying to write my post. I guess since I've got 2 Active As in my home, I am extremely powerless. At times, I feel so powerless and confused, action is difficult. I did go to a meeting last night, and that was a good thing. I tried to go today, however the Ason got pu...

miss lucy · miss lucy

hello again...am back feeling much better than when i last posted. have had a good sleep and the meds kicked in so have eaten (first time since yesterday morning). thanks to all who posted hugs.....really appreciated them. Special thanks to Hotrod for reminding me of the unconditional love i get...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

After talking to an old friend this am, I realized that I am still holding on to a tremendously large amount of resentments when it comes to my older brothers, for a variety of reasons, many to do with regards to my 77 year old mother, whom I am very close to. My friend suggested communication on all of our p...

brightmommy · brightmommy

I am struggling with everything right now. My world as I knew it has been turned upside down and inside out. I am having trouble letting go. We have been together since I was 14 years old and married for 11 years. I am currently going through a divorce. He has committed the ultimate betrayal. Last nig...

miss lucy · miss lucy

I NEED A HUG!!! i have been doing so well....but today i feel like throwing the towel in and returning to AH....i know i shouldn't for my sake as much as his. My IBS symptoms have presented themselves again (presumably due to the stress and the cold weather) and i feel lousy...weak....useless. i am tu...

miss lucy · miss lucy

good morning all......01.00 and i can't sleep....am busy finishing today's task of writing the next chapter of my novel, a task that should have been finished almost 2 years ago but AH stopped me working on the computer because he needed...well you know how that one goes! now i am in my own place i can d...

jasobel · jasobel

I have had so much going on in my life besides my ex A leaving me last month. My best friend has cancer, my ex-husband is on a rampage about my daughter and it just seems like life gets crazier every day. My sponsor said I am doing a good job at giving others in my life over to my HP - but not myself. How do I ask fo...

Charlie · Charlie

-Not a good night. -Empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. -Watching it all fall apart. I can't / don't want to discuss it right now. But, I guess you've all been there before. After not much sleep, I took my 20 minute drive to the MARC station to go to work. Waited around 15 minutes and got an announcement...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am finding that being me is OK. I am getting more comfortable in my own skin! I have had many setbacks in my recovery but today is a great day. The sun is shining & it is not cold up here. We have had unusually warm temps. for January so far. Too all who have been suffering from really bad weather, I fee...

Festfan · Festfan

Arrrggg The past few days have been rough I have had a lot of breakthroughs about myself from this forum and general self- assessment, but Im feeling a little battered because I see the problems (enabling, codepend, self esteem, etc.) but cant work through the solutions yet. I really need to start...

tryingtofindaway2009 · tryingtofindaway2009

I did it, Its been two weeks since i kicked him out and four days since i called it quits. He called last night asking to come home.... He said he would do out patient and go to meetings if he could just come home. I want him to do inpatient so i can see that getting better is something he is serious about... i al...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I genuinely believe, especially after this week, that my HP leads me right where I need to be, right when I need to be there. Not in my time-but always in His. To make a long story short, I set some boundaries this week-probally my first that I can really remember setting and thinking "I need to do th...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I know that I am posting a lot but never had an A actually in Rehab- Sorry... (Preview) So, I'm not sure if I ever posted that the A is actually gonna be living in Florida after rehab. So that adds another dimension to our relationship. My therapist thinks I should completely cut off the relationship as he had pictures of his ex from 6 years ago out before he left for rehab and maybe he is on...	Codependent	3	636	Jan 26, 2010 by RunnerChick
	then and now (Preview) Six months ago I had a check stolen and to date I still have not had it replaced. I have no idea who took the check but have an idea it was someone with an active addiciton who took an opportunity and ran with it. Someday I may know I don't hold out for that information anymore. I do know its been months of ph...	maresie	5	670	Jan 26, 2010 by maresie
	Physical Illness by Changing? - any input welcome (Preview) I woke up this morning, and have an upset tummy and a bit of what usually comes with that. Also, my hands are a bit shaky - so I just don't feel 'right' physically. Might this be from trying to not react and change how I respond? I honestly don't know if I am getting sick or if my body is speaking to me in anoth...	Iamhere	8	863	Jan 26, 2010 by Iamhere
	I need a break from my AH (Preview) My husband has been in jail for almost 2 weeks now and I feel like I've seen him and talked to him ore these past 2 weeks than I have the past 2 months. He calls every day and now that he's doing his work-release, he want us to visit him at work. Also, he just ran into a little road block where he can't drive to/...	N8SMOM	4	914	Jan 26, 2010 by Iamhere
	I finally left him and I'm scared. (Preview) My addict boyfriend, who I live with and have been through everything with this past year, pawned everything of value I own yesterday, intending to go on a heroin binge. I got home, found it all gone, him with it, and a cocky little note- "Sorry babe, love ya". After months of skirting the iss...	Sangyaa	9	911	Jan 26, 2010 by Iamhere
	Need some advice and help (Preview) I am not sure if I am posting in the right area as I am new to this website but I hope that someone might be able to give me some direction as to where to go or some advice as to what I should do. My father in law is a recovering alcoholic and has been sober since before I knew him (about 5 years). We just found out l...	RSFleishm	7	848	Jan 26, 2010 by Iamhere
	I THOUGHT I'D HEARD IT ALL!!!! (Preview) Well my AH never ceases to amaze me.... we had a really great day today. although still living apart we are communicating well and meeting up occassionally so that i can help him with form filling etc (this is part of our separation agreement and i am ok with that because of his illiteracy). Any way......	miss lucy	9	992	Jan 26, 2010 by Iamhere
	How To Plant Your Garden (Preview) How To Plant Your Garden FOR THE GARDEN OF YOUR DAILY LIVING,PLANT THREE ROWS OF PEAS: 1. Peace of mind 2. Peace of heart 3. Peace of soul PLANT FOUR ROWS OF SQUASH: 1. Squash gossip 2. Squash indifference 3. Squash grumbling 4. Squash selfishness PLANT FOUR ROWS OF LETTUCE: 1. Lettuce be faithfu...	Peggy7	3	1388	Jan 26, 2010 by Iamhere
	What do I exhibit that result in people giving me all the work and the resenting me for it? (Preview) It seems at work that I have a tendency to step in when I see things going wrong that I step up and take care of it- often into other people's departments-particularly nursing. However, i am a social worker and as a patient advocate this does go to part of my job description. Needless to say this does not...	Codependent	7	861	Jan 25, 2010 by Codependent
	Not out of the woods yet (Preview) Well dear family, Just when I thought I was doing so well this winter I am hit with a really toughie. I have shingles and it is quite bad. So, my immune system is not what it should be regardless of staying away from the steroids since May of last year. Feeling pretty poorly and so it is a bit of a down hill str...	Suzannah	6	979	Jan 25, 2010 by maresie
	Is this enabling? (Preview) My husband is serving 45 days in jail for a DUI - he is on a work-release program. He can drive himself to/from work. Unfortunately he just found out that they may not let him do that because the DMV has started the process to suspend his driver's license. A lot of people in jail take the bus to/from work, b...	N8SMOM	10	865	Jan 25, 2010 by kmarty
	A V-8 Moment (closed) (Preview) WOW! I wish there was an icon for smacking my head, since that is what I am doing right now! LOL! I guess now I know why people say alanoners also have relapses, because I just had a HUGE one!!! What was I doing going by what my A says about AA anyway? I have never been to an AA meeting, I should have NEVER let...	MaryPoppins	20	1683	Jan 25, 2010 by John
	lost it last night (Preview) <!-- /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-fami...	pineapple	12	1078	Jan 25, 2010 by Debilyn
	Scared about our engagement (super long-- sorry) (Preview) Long time browser, first time poster. I guess I just need any advice or comfort that people throw at me. Background on me: never had personal experience with alcoholism until now, except in distant and dead relatives. I recently became engaged to a very nice man. We are very compatible in basic valu...	Ferny	9	872	Jan 25, 2010 by maresie
	long distance help for sibling...what can I do? (Preview) This is my first attempt to seek out advice on what I've known has been a problem for several years now. My brother, who lives in Las Vegas (I am in NY), and who has been in a relationship for over 30 years, has been drinking regularly and more and more heavily. His partner asked me for help a little over a y...	bessie	5	735	Jan 25, 2010 by bessie
	New term: gaslighting (Preview) I discovered a new term! "gas lighting" or one word, "gaslighting". (from Wikipedia) "Gaslighting is a form of intimidation or psychological abuse in which false information is presented to the victim, making them doubt their own memory and perception. The classic e...	intothewoods	6	4193	Jan 25, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	BABY STEPS - Ebb & Flow of 24 Hours (Preview) Hey all: OK - so took me a bit to process my yesterday. I'll try to keep it simple, but in a nut-shell this was my yesterday. Started out 'great'. Took my oldest to his therapy appointment @ 8:15am, and we had time to stop for coffee. He viewed that as a treat, I viewed it as a necessity. Anyhow, he's soon t...	Iamhere	3	610	Jan 25, 2010 by Iamhere
	Need help (Preview) My daughter, Christina was diagnosed with Bipolar/borderline personality at age 11 and she is now 25. She struggles with depression, alcohol abuse (binge drinking) and an eating disorder. Currently, she is on medication and her eating disorder is now under control but that is when alcohol is the...	powerlessmom	3	537	Jan 25, 2010 by powerlessmom
	(Humor) Gargling With Chamomile Tea !!! (Preview) Some days we need a little humor, and some jokes can make a point that we can relate to our program. To me this joke is another reminder to "Not React". I hope you enjoy it, and take it in the spirit is is intended. A woman complains to her therapist about fights and arguments between she and he...	RLC	2	2406	Jan 25, 2010 by Karilynn
	Taking responsibility.... (Preview) For many years married to my exaH I complained about his complete lack of taking responsibility for himself. I am learning more and more about how my manipulation and control tactics and refusal to accept my reality, was ME not taking responsibility for MYSELF. I have not been unaware to my unhappy m...	Rora	5	778	Jan 25, 2010 by Festfan
	help me (Preview) my daughter is in recovery and has found peace ... my struggle for acceptwnce and giving all of my control to GOD STILL is an issue .... please give me insight on how to find peace...	bioteach	4	703	Jan 24, 2010 by Christy
	It feels soooo good! (Preview) I spent the day yesterday cleaning out my computer room. I shredded years worth of financial documents, and cleaned out cabinets full of not-my-stuff. Much belonging to my exAH, I just piled it up and now need a big box! Considered tossing/shredding the nonessentials, but only hung onto that tho...	Loupiness	3	658	Jan 24, 2010 by Suzannah
	I am so confused... (Preview) I really need to vent about some things and I hope that you don't mind. My A has finished his treatment 2 weeks ago, but is now out of province with his parents due to legal conditions (which should be removed this week or next). We had several conversations about him coming home. He stated how scared he i...	SheWolf	7	941	Jan 24, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	what do I do? (my friend) She wants me to open up ; I'm afraid (Preview) I am trying to work thru this maze of dealing with my girlfriend now. I've been counseled to hang in there with her. I really want to, but I am afraid, so afraid. I feel compelled to open up to her as she asks me to. She can tell that I am avoiding her. My therapist can tell. But I am so afraid. I got close to her la...	Carol_Lynn	3	847	Jan 24, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	help me ...I have spengt the last 30 minutes talking to my daughter who is in a recovery center ... she is awesome and (Preview) so acceptant of God and his palns for her and I am so so distrustful, praranoid ... not so much of her .... but my lack of control in most of life's problems ...... where do I turn .. what do I do>???	bioteach	3	850	Jan 24, 2010 by Jerry F
	One says no..... one says yes......(easy does it!!) (Preview) Hi folksI posted a couple of days ago.....What would you do (regarding giving our son a replacement phone)....and you all reinforced what I knew would be my (read on!) decision. Yesterday husb asked when we were going to send Ason the phone........aaaarrrrrrghhh!! I explained I had been giving i...	Ness	3	682	Jan 24, 2010 by Jerry F
	What would you do? (Preview) Hi All.....Im stuck with what to doAson, at Christmas, had his phone stolen out his pocket while he lay in a drink induced slumber I have a pay-plan on my mobile phone which means me, husb, daughter and Ason get free calls between us all.I have an old phone I could add to the pay-plan that I could give him,...	Ness	10	916	Jan 24, 2010 by Diva
	You whooooo Diva (Preview) Just keep thinking about you and wondering how you are doing now? Kept up with your situation. Such a hard time. I keep ya in my prayers and thoughts. Do you feel like updating us? Spill it pretty lady, I have seen her, she is beautiful! love,debilyn	Debilyn	2	727	Jan 24, 2010 by Diva
	Interesting conversation with my 9 year old - pondering how to proceed (Preview) Background: My AH and I separated under less than optimal circumstances this past October. He is now living with a friend of his and we are going through the process of divorce. This has been a real rollercoaster ride for all of us. My 9 year old son and I are back in the house and we were able to quickly st...	blender_girl	9	770	Jan 24, 2010 by blender_girl
	Close Topic (Preview) HI, Just wondering if it is possible to close your own topic? Or does someone else do it? Thanx	Sam72	3	800	Jan 24, 2010 by Andrea12
	Keep it Simple... (Preview) Aloha Family, hope you're all feeling great. Just wanted to share the slogan that we did our morning meeting on. I reflected on when I got here and when I took the suggestions to learn, memorize and practice the slogans. I also remember "gettin it" on "keep it simple" as a pra...	Jerry F	9	1229	Jan 24, 2010 by Iamhere
	my life is not how i imagined (Preview) So it's been whirlwind lately and I have craziness on top of craziness. The ex finally left yesterday to go to California to live with the next ex/new girlfriend. Maybe this one can save him? I'm being facetious of course. She's very nice and tolerant so maybe it'll last for a bit. My oldest daughter...	carolinagirl	8	897	Jan 24, 2010 by Iamhere
	Pretty much just a vent (Preview) Ok family I have had a couple of rough days with some shinny spots. My son got a dui last week he is already on very supervised probation. Following the DUI (which I knew nothing about at the time) I answered the door in my jammies and here was his PO. They asked if he was here and I looked over to see if h...	fishinmama	3	685	Jan 24, 2010 by Iamhere
	Saturday (Preview) http://africantortoise.com/gallery2/main.php?g2_navId=x475d1134	Debilyn	5	748	Jan 24, 2010 by Iamhere
	One more thing... (Preview) I do enjoy talking to him from rehab and he has asked me to come see him, but admitting that I am powerless over my feelings for him and that he does not feel that way toward me....I am thinking that means no calls and no visits....do I have to broach this via phone or do you think a text is just way too chicken t...	Codependent	4	615	Jan 24, 2010 by Iamhere
	The Chatter in my Brain --- The Pain in my Heart (Preview) Hello to all and I'm very grateful I found you! My story is not unique at all but I'm having a very difficult time channeling the chatter in my head and aligning that with my heart. I am fortunate (or not) to qualify for this program as well as AA. I found AA in 1985, and have been blessed with 24 years clean a...	Iamhere	15	918	Jan 24, 2010 by Iamhere
	enabling (Preview) This is a jump off from another post about enabling. This has been tough for me to figure out. Am I helping or enabling? I often don't know. But Jerry posted a reply to that thread which made such sense to me. I wish I had figured it out by myself. He said ¨What I learned was If the person lacked the time, abil...	pineapple	3	781	Jan 24, 2010 by idontknow
	advice needed... (Preview) Hello all! I'm new to this forum. I am 23 years old and have been living with an alcoholic mother my whole life. She has been abusive both verbally and mentally. I am in college so I only see her in the summer and during vacations but I have so much anger towards her and what she did to me that I find it hard to ta...	Caton	5	869	Jan 23, 2010 by Mattie
	update on taking step-mom's dog last year (Preview) Sometime ago I told you that I had taken my step mother's dog. I had misgivings at the time, but my A father was cruel to the dog and she was not getting out from under an old sideboard in the sitting room. I have no regrets for taking her. She has brought such joy to my life, she stopped losing her hair, I think...	maire rua	8	850	Jan 23, 2010 by Charlie
	Progress (Preview) ((((((((((Hello Friends)))))))), I have had a couple of rough days lately for some reason my husband has been on my mind alot.....as I watch my daughter take her journey in life...I am so proud of her..she is a wonderful mom....going to college full time and working a part time job..she has made so muc...	Andrea12	3	470	Jan 23, 2010 by Karilynn
	The woman in the mirror (Preview) I never had a particularly good self image. Sure i can put makeup on and dress nicely. Other people have said I am pretty, got lovely eyes etc. but I never believed any of it I've just been watching a re-run of one of Gok Wan's how to look good naked programmes. He was helping a lady, who had been through...	miss lucy	2	742	Jan 23, 2010 by CJ
	I'm scared...need ESH (Preview) Hi all-- My AH moved out finally Dec 31 and quite honestly, my life has been full of peace, serenity, independence, and in a word: bliss. I am sleeping, my eating is under control, I am more focused, I'm tons more productive at home, and most importantly I feel more connected to and more patient with my ch...	3littlekittens	7	787	Jan 23, 2010 by 3littlekittens
	Attitude is everything. (Preview) I am tryng to change my attitude from "its not fair", "poor me" to accepting what is my lot today. I know it is far far better than it was 3 years ago. My reflex thoughts are always its not fair and poor me so I have to take it second by second and I am finding it very hard going. No wonder...	maresie	6	1078	Jan 22, 2010 by Christy
	just need to vent! (Preview) AH is seriously testing my patience today....non stop text messages...indirect messages through other people....questions, questions, questions! of course i haven't let him know he is getting to me...i haven't entered into the arguement he is trying to cause....i haven't even answered his...	miss lucy	0	453	Jan 22, 2010 by ImFree2004
	New Eden Addition (Preview) Retired from rescuing the big kids, horses, llamas, pigs huge and small. BUT have always wanted a tortoise in my life. So an opportunity came up to rescue one. He is only about a hundred pounds now, lives in my living room. lol I was going to make a bedroom just for him but decided heck with that, I don't wa...	Debilyn	10	785	Jan 22, 2010 by Rita G
	Practicing Keeping Quiet (Preview) I know my daughter is an A and I`am trying not to engage in any more arguments with her. I really only want to talk to her about my grandaughter who she has custody of. This 6 year old has heard us have many an argument but mostly sees her mother scream and rage. Over X-mass I heard my daughter call me the filth...	Samsgram	2	1192	Jan 22, 2010 by Andrea12
	New Year and new way of facing life.. thanks to Al-Anon (Preview) I just wanted to share the changes I have gone through since starting to work my program. I am really taking the idea of taking care of me seriously. I have gone to a Dr. and had a full check up, which doesnt sound like much but the thought of doing that always scared me before..(better not to know type thin...	Suzi1965	2	773	Jan 22, 2010 by hotrod
	Happy Birthday Christy (Cjo) (Preview) Hey Christy!!!! Just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday :) Hope its a good one for you!! ((((((((hugs))))))))) Kerry	kerry5	16	994	Jan 22, 2010 by Karilynn
	Detachment - Why Harder for one than another? (Preview) Hey all: I'm sitting here, tears and all trying to write my post. I guess since I've got 2 Active As in my home, I am extremely powerless. At times, I feel so powerless and confused, action is difficult. I did go to a meeting last night, and that was a good thing. I tried to go today, however the Ason got pu...	Iamhere	8	894	Jan 22, 2010 by Iamhere
	creativity triumphs!!!! (Preview) hello again...am back feeling much better than when i last posted. have had a good sleep and the meds kicked in so have eaten (first time since yesterday morning). thanks to all who posted hugs.....really appreciated them. Special thanks to Hotrod for reminding me of the unconditional love i get...	miss lucy	3	696	Jan 21, 2010 by wildthang86
	Ways to deal with resentments???? Need some input..... (Preview) After talking to an old friend this am, I realized that I am still holding on to a tremendously large amount of resentments when it comes to my older brothers, for a variety of reasons, many to do with regards to my 77 year old mother, whom I am very close to. My friend suggested communication on all of our p...	shellyj123	5	764	Jan 21, 2010 by shellyj123
	divorce after 11 years of marriage...how to let go (Preview) I am struggling with everything right now. My world as I knew it has been turned upside down and inside out. I am having trouble letting go. We have been together since I was 14 years old and married for 11 years. I am currently going through a divorce. He has committed the ultimate betrayal. Last nig...	brightmommy	12	1255	Jan 21, 2010 by brightmommy
	am not feeling great today - (Preview) I NEED A HUG!!! i have been doing so well....but today i feel like throwing the towel in and returning to AH....i know i shouldn't for my sake as much as his. My IBS symptoms have presented themselves again (presumably due to the stress and the cold weather) and i feel lousy...weak....useless. i am tu...	miss lucy	7	805	Jan 21, 2010 by shellyj123
	MAKING UP FOR LOST TIME (Preview) good morning all......01.00 and i can't sleep....am busy finishing today's task of writing the next chapter of my novel, a task that should have been finished almost 2 years ago but AH stopped me working on the computer because he needed...well you know how that one goes! now i am in my own place i can d...	miss lucy	3	511	Jan 21, 2010 by miss lucy
	Step Two Help - Restoring myself to sanity (Preview) I have had so much going on in my life besides my ex A leaving me last month. My best friend has cancer, my ex-husband is on a rampage about my daughter and it just seems like life gets crazier every day. My sponsor said I am doing a good job at giving others in my life over to my HP - but not myself. How do I ask fo...	jasobel	5	541	Jan 21, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	Sleepless Night (Preview) -Not a good night. -Empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. -Watching it all fall apart. I can't / don't want to discuss it right now. But, I guess you've all been there before. After not much sleep, I took my 20 minute drive to the MARC station to go to work. Waited around 15 minutes and got an announcement...	Charlie	6	816	Jan 21, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	BEING ME IS OK (Preview) I am finding that being me is OK. I am getting more comfortable in my own skin! I have had many setbacks in my recovery but today is a great day. The sun is shining & it is not cold up here. We have had unusually warm temps. for January so far. Too all who have been suffering from really bad weather, I fee...	Hoot Nanny	8	1025	Jan 21, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	I am a roadblock to myself... (Preview) Arrrggg The past few days have been rough I have had a lot of breakthroughs about myself from this forum and general self- assessment, but Im feeling a little battered because I see the problems (enabling, codepend, self esteem, etc.) but cant work through the solutions yet. I really need to start...	Festfan	3	698	Jan 21, 2010 by RunnerChick
	I told him i loved him and then i walked away (Preview) I did it, Its been two weeks since i kicked him out and four days since i called it quits. He called last night asking to come home.... He said he would do out patient and go to meetings if he could just come home. I want him to do inpatient so i can see that getting better is something he is serious about... i al...	tryingtofindaway2009	7	978	Jan 21, 2010 by RunnerChick
	Detachment, boundaries and guilt- (Preview) I genuinely believe, especially after this week, that my HP leads me right where I need to be, right when I need to be there. Not in my time-but always in His. To make a long story short, I set some boundaries this week-probally my first that I can really remember setting and thinking "I need to do th...	shellyj123	4	2176	Jan 21, 2010 by Ness
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.