Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Holly09 · Holly09

Give me strength not to inflict bodily harm on him while he is acting his dry drunk self! That is how I'm feeling right now. Yesterday was all about how he doesn't want to feel like this anymore and how sorry he is and doesn't know what to do...today it's about I don't see why I can't do what I want (not bout...

Debilyn · Debilyn

When my son took me to the jail to fill out papers.... processed, I went to the restroom, he was waiting in the lobby. I came back and he said,"DARN!" "I was hoping you would be gone when they came back so I could tell them you took off!" I slugged him. (here is this big handsome guy ho...

Malsey · Malsey

Hello everyone. I just found this site and am just starting with the steps. I have a friend that I have known for over 4 years, we became close like brother and sister. He is an alcoholic and has used me in every and anyway he could. He just got his 4th DWI and his wife finally kicked him out, He has lived...

Debilyn · Debilyn

The hoarder across the road has caused me insurmountable pain. Now she and ignored what a sargent told her and harrassed me again. To the point that she lyed and lyed about me and I got charged with disorderly conduct. My family probably many generations back have NEVER been in trouble. never. It wi...

el-cee · el-cee

Tonight my son is sleeping on my couch. He is running out of friends to stay with. Putting the anger and guilt trip on me. I told him one night, he's going to see about a room tomorrow, he says. Hes upset he's not welcome anywhere. Feel sorry and want to rescue. My insanity is still alive. I'm sad and feeling...

grateful2be · grateful2be

I recently wrote about my son and his upcoming release from prison for a technical violation (basically drinking/drugging and not reporting because he'd been drinking/drugging). I was feeling like a cheese because I wouldn't make my home an option for a place to go because I know it won't work, I'v...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi Everyone I was sitting here doing a little reading and journal in my book. I ended it with a little prayer for me and my son. I asked God if he could help my son ( 6 days sober) that he finally found a therapy for this deadly disease of Alcoholism. That this time will be the right combination of therapy...

sweeetr · sweeetr

My AH thinks his blood pressure and temper issues have been helped by new doctors med. (Our family doctor kicked him out as a patient after getting popped on a synthetic drug test and showing his butt at the office) Any way ... he found new doctor that did NO blood work and asked for NO medical records.. He...

Laura Baker · Laura Baker

should i call back?

Jerry F · Jerry F

I was brought up in Al-Anon to constantly look for balance...serenity...sanity...peace of mind. God knows that when the disease was raging in my life none of that or those were present. Its not that the tools were not there; as most of you know now or knew then I was way too preoccupied fighting the...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

For some stupid codependent reason I feel the 'need to know'. I feel that I have to know everything, good, bad, whatever. And, even when my intuition tells me something that is most likely true, I feel the need to seek out that truth to validate my intuition. What's up with that???? For example: AH te...

Jen61 · Jen61

My husband has been sober for almost 2 months. His mom died three weeks ago. I could tell right off this afternoon that he had been drinking and found the vodka. Should I use my Al-Anon tools and keep my mouth shut? Thanks and I appreciate your comments.

sandydv · sandydv

Married to AH for almost 22 years. Crappy crappy last few weeks. He doesn't admit he has a problem, he knows it bothers me, asked him a couple weeks ago, why do you ahve to drink every day, he says its not everyday. He tried this week to not drink, which was almost worse cause he was a complete jerk the day...

Rinn · Rinn

So my husband is finally sober, for real. He has sometime under him (a week), he is doing AA, cut off all bad associations and is really trying everyday. I know a week isn't a lot but it is a start and it is the best I have seen in three years. I felt like I took on the whole world for him-my family, his family, h...

Holly09 · Holly09

Tonight I surprised myself my A boyfriend who for the past 3 years has only been drunk 2 times until tonight called me from our shed where he has been all day to tell me he had been drinking and all I said at first was why (not that it matters) he said he didn't know but he had been thinking about it for a long tim...

Tennin · Tennin

Hi All, So the using stepson (19) was asked to leave and with that I feel SO much better about feeling secure in my own home. Today he wanted to come over and I told my husband I am NOT comfortable with him being here until he is sober. There was too much disrespect/lying/etc... on top of the using IN the hous...

blondie99 · blondie99

Maybe it's the full moon; maybe the stars are aligning; maybe everyone's just gone plumb crazy. But there has been a disturbance in The Force this week. It all started with my Monday night meltdown. I felt better the next day, cleansed in a way, but there has just been so much weirdness happening this we...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

First my friends thank you for the reponses to posts about divorce papers being served. This is a crazy time, but just when you thought things couldn't get crazier... I go onto the computer tonight and what do I see in the history but match.com profile! You guessed it, the day after H was served papers...

joker · joker

As you are aware, my abusive alcoholic BF is still working out of town. I am safe for the moment. For that I Thank God and for his protection! He left on Monday and has been texting and phoning me daily. Its driving me nuts! I feel so angry still from the beating! I am having a hard time letting go! Two day...

Cheri_Swanson · Cheri_Swanson

Well, I did it again. I lost control when he had a few beers. No matter how many times I tell myself over and over I won't say anything, I usually end up at some point losing it. Oh, he was in a great mood when I got home from work and he was actually doing some work in the garage, but I knew what was to come. He...

Burses · Burses

So I posted about my issues in my relationship with my AGF. Things haven't gotten much better, of course. About the only thing that's sort of changed is we managed to start going back to AA meetings, which has helped me significantly. She, on the other hand, has continued to drink about every 2-3 days. T...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. As I have mentioned before, I am seeing a counsellor to sort through some emotions I am having. She mentioned within 5 minutes of meeting me that I am avoiding feeling hurt. She could tell by my body language that I would brush thi...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I was reading one of Jerry's replies to a post just now and I didn't really realize but I put it to use this week. " It's none of my business" My partner and I aren't speaking much but I didn't fight, didn't ask the questions, cry, beg or quiz. I just went on with my business. Things are so so mu...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

After A While by Veronica Shoftsall After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises. And you begi...

pillarofstrength0706 · pillarofstrength0706

Frustrated 7 month sober AH wants to communicate but seems only if he approves of topic. I can't voice something without him reading into it the opposite way. I was hoping the days of eggshells would have passed but here we are again. I want my words to mean something and to be heard for a change instead of...

wornoutmrsfixit · wornoutmrsfixit

Remember the interview that I was so nervous about @ 2 weeks ago? Well, I had a great interview and was offered the job today. The schedule is exactly what I wanted. I will have what I hope will be a great part time job and also have enough time at home that I am going to look into foster care on my own. I have wai...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

I'm so upset .. My sick twisted AH sober had to go that extra step to hurt me . He called my sister the only one I talked to in my family and told her what going on. I was making plans to go have lunch with her but I never did!!!! The plans changed !!! I stayed home . I didn't go any where.. My AH controls me on everyt...

daisy31 · daisy31

I seem to attract people in to my life who like me because I am a good listener but who seem to somewhat erase me in a sense. I feel erased often. Even when in talking with people they seem to not give me eye contact but they give it to others. I don't know why this is happening. I also notice that I tend to re...

1976love · 1976love

Two nights ago my AH said some pretty hurtful comments when he was drunk. Had me so upset I couldn't see straight. I was in no frame of mind to make a well thought decision on what I should do. So yesterday when he came home from work he was full of apologies and disgusted by his behavior. I guess it reall...

AngieP · AngieP

I read daily but don't post a lot as its difficult from my phone. Long story shorter my A & I were together for 2 yrs... I left after a the 1st physical incident 6 months ago. He is 5 Months sober and working a great program. I truly want to have a future with him down the road, we still see each other, but a...

NCSUgeology · NCSUgeology

My cousin lives in a corporate apartment. Last night his washing machine overflowed and ran all night and flooded his apartment and the one below it. The malfunction wasn't his fault except that he was passed out upstairs, and didn't hear the water running. They had to completely gut both apartments...

Deneen · Deneen

So my husband and i return from an awesome 3rd 7 days honeymoon, to a sink full of dirty dishes! We have an open 2 family home where my mother n sister in-law lives that i married into for the foundation of this story! So i share with my loving husband how i feel about dirty dishes left in my sink by his family....

jodiee34 · jodiee34

I have been a member of Al-Anon for a few years now. I cannot say that I have mastered any part of it. But I do try hard at not letting things bother me that I cannot control. However, it is still a constant struggle. My partner of 6 years began AA 3 years ago. She is 15 months sober as of two days ago ( so she says...

joker · joker

I really need to vent! I live with an active alcoholic, that denies he is an alcoholic. When he is sober, he is resonable however has a lot of unresolved anger that he takes out on me. He yells and swears and demands. Abusive. He has physically assualted me numerous times and I had to call the police on...

Pushka · Pushka

I'm not going to lie .. if I really had brass balls I would be ALL over this, I've taken action recently NOTHING like this .. LOL!!! For those who have followed my 2 year ordeal .. this is EXACTLY what I have wanted to do to that dang whiskey truck .. I figured I'd give a visual .. LOL!!! All this needs is a pi...

sadsusie · sadsusie

Okay, So i missed the FTF meeting I was gonna go to this morning (and not that is not the subject of the post)... to my defense I have been sick with a headcold, sore throat, coughing etc. And I got up in the middle of the night and couldn't go back to sleep. I am still a wimp though and could have gone if i really...

Jozie · Jozie

Well as Much as I would Like to Say: She is Improving Wonderfully... I'm not quite convinced we are there yet! For those of you that Don't know my Story, My AGram Had a Stroke & I Found her on Mothers Day at her Home... You know I Honestly don't know were I would be without the Support & Love of this Pr...

1976love · 1976love

What was I thinking??? Trying to talk to a drunk. Some of tonights comments included: You have to accept me like this, it is who I am. You were just spoiled fro 5 months (when AH was going to AA) Nothing really changed, we had the same money, same bills, same jobs, same friends, it was all the same, so w...

PP · PP

oregon_mom_of_3 · oregon_mom_of_3

I am a newbie. there dont seem to be any Al-anon meetings in my area at any times I can attend. I have been looking for ways to connect online and hope here I can make some friends. My AH was supposed to start outpatient group therapy tonight. He had orientation on saturday. But he didnt go. He called me at...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Somebody called me from the Parole Office today in regards to my son who has been trying to call me for two weeks even though I've e-mailed him that I won't accept the calls (too much money plus they want my debit or credit card #s). I'm fairly certain each is calling because they want my home to be his afte...

sadsusie · sadsusie

Sorry I've been gone for a while We are perhaps in a different place now. I wrote this a few nights ago..... I returned home after the night at the hotel (finally some peace) to find that no one was home. Thank god. I later got a call from my husband who felt like total crap from all the drugs and drinking fro...

Jerry F · Jerry F

gets lived best with higher power in attendance. Wasn't very long ago my elder brother passed thru the gates twix this room and the next because of cancer which he lived with for over 5 years. This morning I get an untitled email from my younger brother that he has been diagnosed with pancreatic canc...

dponlyme · dponlyme

This one at a different location but quite a few of the same people. My wife asked if there was an AA meeting at the same time and there was and she went to it. Good but not trying to think about that one way or the other. Still nervous to be there honestly . They talked about "take what you want and leave t...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Yesterday afternoon papers were served to my husband, and now the process is officially underway. I am a mix of emotions--maybe in shock a bit? I feel strong, resolved, know it's the right decision for me one moment, sad, questioning the next. So far the three kids are doing alright, I think our olde...

Kay356 · Kay356

TUESDAY NIGHT MEETING 9PM (EST) - TOPIC: THE SLOGANS OF ALANON Meeting scheduled in the al-anon chat room TOPICS are: KEEP COMING BACK, EASY DOES IT; HOW IMPORTANT IS IT? The group meeting room can be easily accessed by clicking on the link on the menu bar above the board. You can also join directly at h...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I called him this morn. He was quiet and listened. He says things will change, as far as his situation. I said for now I cannot do this. He was very sweet,gentle and asked me what he can do. Of course I told him I cannot make him change things. That is up to him. He wanted to call me tonight. I adamently said no...

PP · PP

I am struggling today to keep my nose clean and looking forward to a meeting tonight. I know this is all triggered by a neurologist visit I had with my father...it is really looking like he is in one of the stages of Alzheimer's disease. I visited with him yesterday and watched him cry over and over agai...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

I am noticing today that I am doing a good job using my alanon tools at home with my H. That is the good news. Peaceful night at home, staying focused on me, not being mean, all good. Now for the bad news. reflecting on my work day, i see that I was Miss Negativity in the office today. Finding the negative in...

blondie99 · blondie99

Tonight, for the first time in 10 years, I planted my own vegetable garden. I started small - just some tomato plants (the little cherry ones I like so much) and some green chile. My uncle and his friend came and fixed my irrigation system several weeks ago so I've been sitting on go for some time. I have ha...

John · John

Seems everyone has some level of weirdness about them.... Then one day two people meet each other whose weirdness is compatible... They hook up, express their weirdness with each other... And they call it LOVE. "hey babe, ya wanna check out my weirdness, I think we'd make a good weird match!" LMAO

gavtrfc · gavtrfc

well here i am,lost in my own mind. for 6 months my newlywed wife has had a drink problem. always was a big drinker because her mum and dad drink a lot but was never an alcoholic. we had our daughter in 2010 and got married sept 2012. even on our honey moon she was permenetly drunk. since xmas, iv been comin ho...

sweeetr · sweeetr

FYI: Beware of ppl with these characteristics Warning signs for meeting or trusting people 1) Arrogant entitlement 2) Lack of empathy 3) No remorse/guilt (may even brag about screwing other people over) 4) Irresponsible/self-destructive 5) Thrive on drama 6) Brag about outsmarting 7) Short-te...

Lyne · Lyne

OK-Did you hear a volcano erupt yesterday? It was me. My A spouse finally joined a recovery group, and she even went to a meeting Sat. and Sun. She announced in the car yesterday, that she would go every other week. With everything I've learned I just could not help what happened. My adrenalin star...

KLotus · KLotus

My experience and healing process is leading me to ask a lot of very difficult questions. Thank you for letting me share. I am wondering - for all of you in marriages or relationships/partnerships with alcoholics - is abuse, in some form, a common element? I am examining myself, and the emotional/p...

Debilyn · Debilyn

The situation has made me very sick. I go from deep depression back to sorta ok. Always having my serenity foundation. His situation is his, not mine. It has gotten where I just cannot face talking to him anymore. Or any communication. The thought just hurts. It's so very hard to stay away from him. But I...

gwenci · gwenci

im sorry please look at my other old thread as ive added to it and i desprately need opinions please!

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

How many times do I need to set myself up for failure. I can't hide anything with out the Ah finding it.. Again my accounts have been revealed. Why do I set my self up . Ah always seam to no everything I do. I give up on any sight for help.. It get found and then this set me back thinking I was going to get better ti...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

My AH sent me a long text, nothing much different that what he's done in the past, all about how he is sorry, he loves me, he feels worthless, he is a f'ng loser, on and on, BUT (big but) in the text, he said, "I know you don't want to hear my pity party, but.." I nearly danced when I saw that. He may or...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I have caught myself falling back into people pleasing which sacrifices me, I have been judgemental instead of minding what is in my own hoola hoop, I have been trying to control instead of letting go and letting God. I am struggling living in low income apartments surrounded by neighbors who are inv...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Give me strength (Preview) Give me strength not to inflict bodily harm on him while he is acting his dry drunk self! That is how I'm feeling right now. Yesterday was all about how he doesn't want to feel like this anymore and how sorry he is and doesn't know what to do...today it's about I don't see why I can't do what I want (not bout...	Holly09	0	294	May 27, 2013 by Holly09
	couple little things.... (Preview) When my son took me to the jail to fill out papers.... processed, I went to the restroom, he was waiting in the lobby. I came back and he said,"DARN!" "I was hoping you would be gone when they came back so I could tell them you took off!" I slugged him. (here is this big handsome guy ho...	Debilyn	1	750	May 27, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Hello, I am new here (Preview) Hello everyone. I just found this site and am just starting with the steps. I have a friend that I have known for over 4 years, we became close like brother and sister. He is an alcoholic and has used me in every and anyway he could. He just got his 4th DWI and his wife finally kicked him out, He has lived...	Malsey	3	261	May 27, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Living in the numb and tears ab (Preview) The hoarder across the road has caused me insurmountable pain. Now she and ignored what a sargent told her and harrassed me again. To the point that she lyed and lyed about me and I got charged with disorderly conduct. My family probably many generations back have NEVER been in trouble. never. It wi...	Debilyn	5	1053	May 27, 2013 by Breakingfree
	unlearning (Preview) Tonight my son is sleeping on my couch. He is running out of friends to stay with. Putting the anger and guilt trip on me. I told him one night, he's going to see about a room tomorrow, he says. Hes upset he's not welcome anywhere. Feel sorry and want to rescue. My insanity is still alive. I'm sad and feeling...	el-cee	9	407	May 27, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	AS returns from prison in a few days (Preview) I recently wrote about my son and his upcoming release from prison for a technical violation (basically drinking/drugging and not reporting because he'd been drinking/drugging). I was feeling like a cheese because I wouldn't make my home an option for a place to go because I know it won't work, I'v...	grateful2be	6	392	May 27, 2013 by Debilyn
	Prayers (Preview) Hi Everyone I was sitting here doing a little reading and journal in my book. I ended it with a little prayer for me and my son. I asked God if he could help my son ( 6 days sober) that he finally found a therapy for this deadly disease of Alcoholism. That this time will be the right combination of therapy...	Cathyinaz	8	863	May 27, 2013 by el-cee
	doctors that keep giving more pills ???? (Preview) My AH thinks his blood pressure and temper issues have been helped by new doctors med. (Our family doctor kicked him out as a patient after getting popped on a synthetic drug test and showing his butt at the office) Any way ... he found new doctor that did NO blood work and asked for NO medical records.. He...	sweeetr	7	1822	May 26, 2013 by grateful2be
	Calling again! (Preview) should i call back?	Laura Baker	5	343	May 26, 2013 by Laura Baker
	New Avatar (Preview) I was brought up in Al-Anon to constantly look for balance...serenity...sanity...peace of mind. God knows that when the disease was raging in my life none of that or those were present. Its not that the tools were not there; as most of you know now or knew then I was way too preoccupied fighting the...	Jerry F	11	483	May 26, 2013 by Pushka
	Stay on my side of the street (Preview) For some stupid codependent reason I feel the 'need to know'. I feel that I have to know everything, good, bad, whatever. And, even when my intuition tells me something that is most likely true, I feel the need to seek out that truth to validate my intuition. What's up with that???? For example: AH te...	ilovedogs	5	1130	May 26, 2013 by Pushka
	When you know they are drinking...and find the vodka (Preview) My husband has been sober for almost 2 months. His mom died three weeks ago. I could tell right off this afternoon that he had been drinking and found the vodka. Should I use my Al-Anon tools and keep my mouth shut? Thanks and I appreciate your comments.	Jen61	9	506	May 26, 2013 by Pushka
	frustrated, hurt, angry, stuck (Preview) Married to AH for almost 22 years. Crappy crappy last few weeks. He doesn't admit he has a problem, he knows it bothers me, asked him a couple weeks ago, why do you ahve to drink every day, he says its not everyday. He tried this week to not drink, which was almost worse cause he was a complete jerk the day...	sandydv	10	596	May 26, 2013 by Debilyn
	I am having the hardest time right now (Preview) So my husband is finally sober, for real. He has sometime under him (a week), he is doing AA, cut off all bad associations and is really trying everyday. I know a week isn't a lot but it is a start and it is the best I have seen in three years. I felt like I took on the whole world for him-my family, his family, h...	Rinn	8	559	May 26, 2013 by Debilyn
	Surprising myself (Preview) Tonight I surprised myself my A boyfriend who for the past 3 years has only been drunk 2 times until tonight called me from our shed where he has been all day to tell me he had been drinking and all I said at first was why (not that it matters) he said he didn't know but he had been thinking about it for a long tim...	Holly09	2	326	May 26, 2013 by Jerry F
	Feeling at a loss (Preview) Hi All, So the using stepson (19) was asked to leave and with that I feel SO much better about feeling secure in my own home. Today he wanted to come over and I told my husband I am NOT comfortable with him being here until he is sober. There was too much disrespect/lying/etc... on top of the using IN the hous...	Tennin	14	612	May 25, 2013 by Tennin
	A disturbance in The Force (Preview) Maybe it's the full moon; maybe the stars are aligning; maybe everyone's just gone plumb crazy. But there has been a disturbance in The Force this week. It all started with my Monday night meltdown. I felt better the next day, cleansed in a way, but there has just been so much weirdness happening this we...	blondie99	3	515	May 25, 2013 by Jill
	keeps getting better (Preview) First my friends thank you for the reponses to posts about divorce papers being served. This is a crazy time, but just when you thought things couldn't get crazier... I go onto the computer tonight and what do I see in the history but match.com profile! You guessed it, the day after H was served papers...	yanksfan51	13	433	May 24, 2013 by grateful2be
	Tired of crazymaking (Preview) As you are aware, my abusive alcoholic BF is still working out of town. I am safe for the moment. For that I Thank God and for his protection! He left on Monday and has been texting and phoning me daily. Its driving me nuts! I feel so angry still from the beating! I am having a hard time letting go! Two day...	joker	3	397	May 25, 2013 by Jerry F
	I am so numb after last night.... (Preview) Well, I did it again. I lost control when he had a few beers. No matter how many times I tell myself over and over I won't say anything, I usually end up at some point losing it. Oh, he was in a great mood when I got home from work and he was actually doing some work in the garage, but I knew what was to come. He...	Cheri_Swanson	14	687	May 24, 2013 by joker
	I don't know how to get away from AGF (Preview) So I posted about my issues in my relationship with my AGF. Things haven't gotten much better, of course. About the only thing that's sort of changed is we managed to start going back to AA meetings, which has helped me significantly. She, on the other hand, has continued to drink about every 2-3 days. T...	Burses	14	579	May 24, 2013 by KennyFenderjazz
	It hurts (Preview) Hi everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. As I have mentioned before, I am seeing a counsellor to sort through some emotions I am having. She mentioned within 5 minutes of meeting me that I am avoiding feeling hurt. She could tell by my body language that I would brush thi...	slogan_jim	11	494	May 24, 2013 by Peggy7
	What Jerry F said (Preview) I was reading one of Jerry's replies to a post just now and I didn't really realize but I put it to use this week. " It's none of my business" My partner and I aren't speaking much but I didn't fight, didn't ask the questions, cry, beg or quiz. I just went on with my business. Things are so so mu...	Cathyinaz	5	407	May 24, 2013 by Jozie
	Had to share this... (Preview) After A While by Veronica Shoftsall After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises. And you begi...	Breakingfree	3	271	May 23, 2013 by sandydv
	frustrated communication (Preview) Frustrated 7 month sober AH wants to communicate but seems only if he approves of topic. I can't voice something without him reading into it the opposite way. I was hoping the days of eggshells would have passed but here we are again. I want my words to mean something and to be heard for a change instead of...	pillarofstrength0706	7	408	May 23, 2013 by sandydv
	I GOT THE JOB!! (Preview) Remember the interview that I was so nervous about @ 2 weeks ago? Well, I had a great interview and was offered the job today. The schedule is exactly what I wanted. I will have what I hope will be a great part time job and also have enough time at home that I am going to look into foster care on my own. I have wai...	wornoutmrsfixit	14	354	May 23, 2013 by Pushka
	Why does this drunk think he can (Preview) I'm so upset .. My sick twisted AH sober had to go that extra step to hurt me . He called my sister the only one I talked to in my family and told her what going on. I was making plans to go have lunch with her but I never did!!!! The plans changed !!! I stayed home . I didn't go any where.. My AH controls me on everyt...	Ms co-dependent	17	562	May 23, 2013 by el-cee
	How to use the program in this situation (Preview) I seem to attract people in to my life who like me because I am a good listener but who seem to somewhat erase me in a sense. I feel erased often. Even when in talking with people they seem to not give me eye contact but they give it to others. I don't know why this is happening. I also notice that I tend to re...	daisy31	6	623	May 23, 2013 by canadianguy
	a decision I am comfortable with (Preview) Two nights ago my AH said some pretty hurtful comments when he was drunk. Had me so upset I couldn't see straight. I was in no frame of mind to make a well thought decision on what I should do. So yesterday when he came home from work he was full of apologies and disgusted by his behavior. I guess it reall...	1976love	3	326	May 23, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Struggling (Preview) I read daily but don't post a lot as its difficult from my phone. Long story shorter my A & I were together for 2 yrs... I left after a the 1st physical incident 6 months ago. He is 5 Months sober and working a great program. I truly want to have a future with him down the road, we still see each other, but a...	AngieP	2	317	May 23, 2013 by rehprof
	It's official - He's homeless (Preview) My cousin lives in a corporate apartment. Last night his washing machine overflowed and ran all night and flooded his apartment and the one below it. The malfunction wasn't his fault except that he was passed out upstairs, and didn't hear the water running. They had to completely gut both apartments...	NCSUgeology	6	496	May 23, 2013 by NCSUgeology
	frustrating resentiment and growing! (Preview) So my husband and i return from an awesome 3rd 7 days honeymoon, to a sink full of dirty dishes! We have an open 2 family home where my mother n sister in-law lives that i married into for the foundation of this story! So i share with my loving husband how i feel about dirty dishes left in my sink by his family....	Deneen	1	269	May 23, 2013 by Tennin
	Keep coming back, It works if you work it.... (Preview) I have been a member of Al-Anon for a few years now. I cannot say that I have mastered any part of it. But I do try hard at not letting things bother me that I cannot control. However, it is still a constant struggle. My partner of 6 years began AA 3 years ago. She is 15 months sober as of two days ago ( so she says...	jodiee34	2	1750	May 23, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Frustrated and angry (Preview) I really need to vent! I live with an active alcoholic, that denies he is an alcoholic. When he is sober, he is resonable however has a lot of unresolved anger that he takes out on me. He yells and swears and demands. Abusive. He has physically assualted me numerous times and I had to call the police on...	joker	5	454	May 23, 2013 by Breakingfree
	My hero!! (Preview) I'm not going to lie .. if I really had brass balls I would be ALL over this, I've taken action recently NOTHING like this .. LOL!!! For those who have followed my 2 year ordeal .. this is EXACTLY what I have wanted to do to that dang whiskey truck .. I figured I'd give a visual .. LOL!!! All this needs is a pi...	Pushka	2	280	May 23, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Doing the right thing when it feels so wrong. (Preview) Okay, So i missed the FTF meeting I was gonna go to this morning (and not that is not the subject of the post)... to my defense I have been sick with a headcold, sore throat, coughing etc. And I got up in the middle of the night and couldn't go back to sleep. I am still a wimp though and could have gone if i really...	sadsusie	8	450	May 22, 2013 by oojynxie
	Update... AGram & Me... (Preview) Well as Much as I would Like to Say: She is Improving Wonderfully... I'm not quite convinced we are there yet! For those of you that Don't know my Story, My AGram Had a Stroke & I Found her on Mothers Day at her Home... You know I Honestly don't know were I would be without the Support & Love of this Pr...	Jozie	3	311	May 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	cut to the inner core (Preview) What was I thinking??? Trying to talk to a drunk. Some of tonights comments included: You have to accept me like this, it is who I am. You were just spoiled fro 5 months (when AH was going to AA) Nothing really changed, we had the same money, same bills, same jobs, same friends, it was all the same, so w...	1976love	5	467	May 22, 2013 by el-cee
	Wanted to share (Preview)	PP	4	247	May 22, 2013 by el-cee
	Inpatient ? (Preview) I am a newbie. there dont seem to be any Al-anon meetings in my area at any times I can attend. I have been looking for ways to connect online and hope here I can make some friends. My AH was supposed to start outpatient group therapy tonight. He had orientation on saturday. But he didnt go. He called me at...	oregon_mom_of_3	6	493	May 22, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	E/S/H requested (Preview) Somebody called me from the Parole Office today in regards to my son who has been trying to call me for two weeks even though I've e-mailed him that I won't accept the calls (too much money plus they want my debit or credit card #s). I'm fairly certain each is calling because they want my home to be his afte...	grateful2be	12	340	May 22, 2013 by grateful2be
	Trying to move forward He is suffering and I have suffered (continued) (Preview) Sorry I've been gone for a while We are perhaps in a different place now. I wrote this a few nights ago..... I returned home after the night at the hotel (finally some peace) to find that no one was home. Thank god. I later got a call from my husband who felt like total crap from all the drugs and drinking fro...	sadsusie	7	452	May 22, 2013 by PP
	Life on Life's terms... (Preview) gets lived best with higher power in attendance. Wasn't very long ago my elder brother passed thru the gates twix this room and the next because of cancer which he lived with for over 5 years. This morning I get an untitled email from my younger brother that he has been diagnosed with pancreatic canc...	Jerry F	6	302	May 22, 2013 by Jozie
	2nd f2f meeting (Preview) This one at a different location but quite a few of the same people. My wife asked if there was an AA meeting at the same time and there was and she went to it. Good but not trying to think about that one way or the other. Still nervous to be there honestly . They talked about "take what you want and leave t...	dponlyme	5	250	May 22, 2013 by Pushka
	Papers served yesterday (Preview) Yesterday afternoon papers were served to my husband, and now the process is officially underway. I am a mix of emotions--maybe in shock a bit? I feel strong, resolved, know it's the right decision for me one moment, sad, questioning the next. So far the three kids are doing alright, I think our olde...	yanksfan51	5	381	May 22, 2013 by Pushka
	TUESDAY NIGHT MEETING 9PM (EST) - TOPIC: THE SLOGANS OF ALANON (Preview) TUESDAY NIGHT MEETING 9PM (EST) - TOPIC: THE SLOGANS OF ALANON Meeting scheduled in the al-anon chat room TOPICS are: KEEP COMING BACK, EASY DOES IT; HOW IMPORTANT IS IT? The group meeting room can be easily accessed by clicking on the link on the menu bar above the board. You can also join directly at h...	Kay356	0	247	May 22, 2013 by Kay356
	It's horrible (Preview) I called him this morn. He was quiet and listened. He says things will change, as far as his situation. I said for now I cannot do this. He was very sweet,gentle and asked me what he can do. Of course I told him I cannot make him change things. That is up to him. He wanted to call me tonight. I adamently said no...	Debilyn	9	617	May 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	Looking Forward to a Meeting Tonight (Preview) I am struggling today to keep my nose clean and looking forward to a meeting tonight. I know this is all triggered by a neurologist visit I had with my father...it is really looking like he is in one of the stages of Alzheimer's disease. I visited with him yesterday and watched him cry over and over agai...	PP	10	457	May 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	Working my program means working it everywhere. (Preview) I am noticing today that I am doing a good job using my alanon tools at home with my H. That is the good news. Peaceful night at home, staying focused on me, not being mean, all good. Now for the bad news. reflecting on my work day, i see that I was Miss Negativity in the office today. Finding the negative in...	ParisMemories	2	247	May 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	How does your garden grow? (Preview) Tonight, for the first time in 10 years, I planted my own vegetable garden. I started small - just some tomato plants (the little cherry ones I like so much) and some green chile. My uncle and his friend came and fixed my irrigation system several weeks ago so I've been sitting on go for some time. I have ha...	blondie99	13	444	May 22, 2013 by grateful2be
	Just weirdness... (Preview) Seems everyone has some level of weirdness about them.... Then one day two people meet each other whose weirdness is compatible... They hook up, express their weirdness with each other... And they call it LOVE. "hey babe, ya wanna check out my weirdness, I think we'd make a good weird match!" LMAO	John	14	443	May 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	dunno where to go from here... (Preview) well here i am,lost in my own mind. for 6 months my newlywed wife has had a drink problem. always was a big drinker because her mum and dad drink a lot but was never an alcoholic. we had our daughter in 2010 and got married sept 2012. even on our honey moon she was permenetly drunk. since xmas, iv been comin ho...	gavtrfc	7	468	May 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	saw this on TV and wanted to share (Preview) FYI: Beware of ppl with these characteristics Warning signs for meeting or trusting people 1) Arrogant entitlement 2) Lack of empathy 3) No remorse/guilt (may even brag about screwing other people over) 4) Irresponsible/self-destructive 5) Thrive on drama 6) Brag about outsmarting 7) Short-te...	sweeetr	3	218	May 22, 2013 by PP
	volcanic eruption (Preview) OK-Did you hear a volcano erupt yesterday? It was me. My A spouse finally joined a recovery group, and she even went to a meeting Sat. and Sun. She announced in the car yesterday, that she would go every other week. With everything I've learned I just could not help what happened. My adrenalin star...	Lyne	4	233	May 21, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Share your experience, please. (Preview) My experience and healing process is leading me to ask a lot of very difficult questions. Thank you for letting me share. I am wondering - for all of you in marriages or relationships/partnerships with alcoholics - is abuse, in some form, a common element? I am examining myself, and the emotional/p...	KLotus	7	406	May 21, 2013 by el-cee
	In love with the co dependant of an AW (Preview) The situation has made me very sick. I go from deep depression back to sorta ok. Always having my serenity foundation. His situation is his, not mine. It has gotten where I just cannot face talking to him anymore. Or any communication. The thought just hurts. It's so very hard to stay away from him. But I...	Debilyn	12	603	May 21, 2013 by Aloha
	heads in a mess opinions please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) im sorry please look at my other old thread as ive added to it and i desprately need opinions please!	gwenci	4	369	May 21, 2013 by sweeetr
	I should no better by now!!! (Preview) How many times do I need to set myself up for failure. I can't hide anything with out the Ah finding it.. Again my accounts have been revealed. Why do I set my self up . Ah always seam to no everything I do. I give up on any sight for help.. It get found and then this set me back thinking I was going to get better ti...	Ms co-dependent	5	666	May 21, 2013 by el-cee
	Something positive? (Preview) My AH sent me a long text, nothing much different that what he's done in the past, all about how he is sorry, he loves me, he feels worthless, he is a f'ng loser, on and on, BUT (big but) in the text, he said, "I know you don't want to hear my pity party, but.." I nearly danced when I saw that. He may or...	ParisMemories	5	336	May 21, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Never ending mess within me (Preview) I have caught myself falling back into people pleasing which sacrifices me, I have been judgemental instead of minding what is in my own hoola hoop, I have been trying to control instead of letting go and letting God. I am struggling living in low income apartments surrounded by neighbors who are inv...	Breakingfree	8	426	May 20, 2013 by PP
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.