Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Suzannah · Suzannah

Hello Family, This weekend has been an eye-opener for me, and one that has really proved to me that I am working my programme. However, I have come across some things that have got me thinking about what I should do or shoud not do. Remembering that I have accepted step one - I have no control over my daugh...

charr · charr

My ah and i have been married for 18 years and together 20. At first the only things we had in common was drinking. I think that should have been my sign. (i grew up with an AF and my mother suffered as us kids did) I really wish i could go back and change what happened and left. we never really talked in the be...

meagain · meagain

I wrote before about my Ds and DIL perhaps separting. I finally had a email from him (after I emailed him ) stating Mom we are OK we just need time. OK what does that mean. Well to me--it means butt out--he will call when he feels ready. So I will not die if I don't see the kids for a few weeks or so. ....Anyway I t...

amybear · amybear

I know that I'm married to an A... have known for years, lived in denial that it wasn't that bad... no beating, no trouble with the law, always living paycheck to paycheck.... Then about 2 years ago, he felt like he was having a heart attack and off to the hospital we went... turns out he has acid reflux dis...

emma · emma

Hi roomies, It has been a while since I've posted. I've had a series of opportunities for growth ... Some things that a few years ago would have upset me terribly, now just seem specially sent to get me to where I am to be. That 4th step that my sponsor and I only got partially through ... an opportunity to...

Christy · Christy

This is just a shout out to all my Alanon sisters and brothers. I hope this song makes your spirits soar :) (from the movie Patch Adams)

charr · charr

My husband wants to go out with this couple and The man is one of the stray dogs he brought home and he wants to me and him to hang out with him and his wife, I told him i don't feel comfortable around those people. It just makes me sick to my stomach. I really hate this guy, i blame him for what he is doing with my h...

marmare · marmare

First I want to say that it is nice the door is always open here and it feels so right, so welcoming, and so much like home.... Well, my A has been sober two days, he also has made his own doctor's appointment to get back on meds for the bi-polar, without me urging him or pushing him, or telling him he needed to...

martin · martin

Hi There! I'm here for myself and my children. My husband drinks and smokes pot. For many years he has been using daily. I first realized what a problem it was and what denial I was in about my situation a little over a year ago. I was drinking as well, but not daily. One day, I looked around and saw that...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

The sun is shining today, and I am filled with gratitude. We will have our next group conscience at AA a week from this coming Wednesday and will discuss Alanon starting up again. I was over at my sponsor's last night, and his wife is also commited to making a go of Alanon, so that is good! I am excited, and I...

norwood · norwood

Hi all, I recently rediscovered my love and kindness and became once again comfortable with that being my nature. Of course, that is so much due to my program and my wonderful support. I have some incredible direct support from my family, my sponsor and those I guess I could call my chorus of positive...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

We have been in a wind advisory today with gusts up to 60 mph. For two years now, I have put up with my neighbor to the west who has a crappy old metal shed that isn't anchored down. It keeps blowing into my fencing. Today was the final straw as her idea of 'anchoring' it down was putting railroad ties laying d...

ddub · ddub

Ever feel like you are running in circles or yup, hitting your head against the wall? Yeah, me too. Awareness, acceptance, action again & again. Things change but not anything that makes a different result. Maybe I can figure this out with writing now or MIP help so...... ah is courteous, kin...

DeadOrAlive · DeadOrAlive

Hello friends, I am just trying to hold on and let my AH do what he does and not react. But boy is he pushing my buttons this am. He was supposed to get up at six (my son had to wake him) and take our son to his SATs. I t o l d him the time frame he had planned was cutting it close, but does he listen? Well it is out...

Jill · Jill

Weeks ago someone posted about a friend who died of alcoholism and asked if anyone wanted prayers for someone we hold dear who is in the same boat. I asked prayers for my brother and have received some feedback from our members assuring me they are praying for him. I have found this such a comfort during t...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

It's hard to reflect back over my life and comprehend just how little I settled for throughout my adult life. I was born to two very loving, caring parents, neither alcoholics, but along with their union in marriage came the baggage of generations of alcoholics on both sides. I was a very shy kid growin...

Tracy · Tracy

Its been 2 weeks since I saw my A most of the time I am doing o.k life is a lot more manageable. Feel like I am heading in right direction. But then the emotions take over anger one minute, lonely the next, scared so scared. How can he have ever loved me why hasn;t he called to apologise for letting me down aga...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingMay 4, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...

glad · glad

I thank God for the two good meetings I went to this week. I learned so much from other peoples shares. I really didn't think I would ever have any idea why I feel so incomplete or "not as good as" the rest of the world. I now have some idea and realized that there is a higher power that (not only CAN...

JeannineM · JeannineM

please someone shoot me end the pain. i am currently at my in-laws house pickin up my daughter. My Ah is here right now and is piss drunk. he is currently screaming, falling over and blaming everything on me. he is in the basement talking to his father. my daughter is down the park with my mother-in-law....

intothewoods · intothewoods

I need some ESH on this guys.... how do you deal with an A who's not in denial anymore, but still isn't exactly in recovery? My A fiance is going to therapy and genuinely trying to work out his issues and figure out his disease, etc. Of course he won't go to AA. There's a million excuses, but the bottom line i...

Aloha · Aloha

After the emotional weekend I had with my AH, I've just been feeling pretty low and beat down. I'm thinking part of it is hormones - PMS time for me. I imagine PMS must feel something similar to how it feels when an A isn't drinking. I'm restless and irritable and I go through high highs and low lows. I've be...

acjmom · acjmom

Hello All, have not posted in a week or so but have kept up on the reading here....always such a big help...seems like when Im about at the end of my rope I can come here and read for a bit and it helps to calm me. LOTS of changes in my household the past week or so....I made up my mind that I will no longer do th...

meagain · meagain

Thankyou for the posts from the other nite. I have tried to call my son re: separting from his wife. I left messages on his cell phone. I don't want to call his home-I feel that I would be interfering with his wife and him. I would love to take the kids for the evening...........I am trying to LEt Go and Let G...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Some of you will remember that I first came here, devastated by the relationship I had with my daughter, well to be honest the relationship I did NOT have with my daughter. Since then I have been learning how to focus on me; to change the things I could in me and accept the things I could not change in her. I...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

(((((Family))))) Well I'm back home again. We had a great flight both ways. I must say, I was worried for nothing. I truly had a good time. My daughter enjoyed her birthday , and I didn't have to end up being a third wheel with her and her boyfriend Hubby was on his best behavior, going out of his way to make m...

Lanchas · Lanchas

I just went to my first AA meeting despite not being an A. I bawled through most of the meeting. I caused the woman that was heading hte meeting enough that she wanted to talk to me afterwards. She told me about Alateen and Alanon. Once I got up the urge to speak to her (I had kept saying to my friend, Nate, I do...

Momto4 · Momto4

I've been with my A husband for almost 10 years. We've had 3 children with one on the way. I'm pretty much at my wit's end with him. After reading this board for the last few days I see I am pretty much a textbook A wife/sig. other. His biggest complaint about me is I'm a control freak. (in his words) I've alwa...

doublesmommy · doublesmommy

To an Al-Anon meeting next Monday evening. I posted late last week my story, and thank you to everyone that responded, I did some more reserach on Al Anon, and after thinking about it and talking with my counsellor today who helped me to realize my H is alchohol dependant (he is a functioning alcoholic,...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((Family)))))))), Thank you all for the wonderful birthday wishes. It was indeed a lovely day. Even though the sun was shining we pretended it was a rainy day. We stayed home, watched movies and ate . I made all of my favorite foods with lots of butter. Julia Child had nothing on me that d...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Today is my Friday! (assuming you don't count my 2nd job in which case Saturday is my Friday LOL) Next time I come here I will be a divorced woman! For those of you who know my story you're probably saying it's about dang time!!! ;) Monday is the court date to finalize the divorce and give me full custo...

round3 · round3

I'm so blessed to have this board. I've been reading so many of the posts lately - and so many apply to my situation. (HP????) As many of you know...my on-again off-again on-again off-again 30 year romance with my A seems to be on again - albeit from a great distance. But he's been talking to me about...

JeannineM · JeannineM

Hello Everyone, I wanted to say thank you for all the replies and suggestions I have received fromall of you. Next, i don't even know where to start I cannot think or function anymore? I think I am on auto cruise control or something. It's like I am in a fog. The only thing I can do is get up (barely) get ...

angel123 · angel123

The Butterfly Story Before this great change comes about, The fuzzy little worm withdraws from its caterpillar world, an finds itself a place alone ,and there painfully, and with much struggling, it wraps itself tightly into a cocoon of its own making; It literally seals itself from the world. Days...

ThisIsBlythe · ThisIsBlythe

The alcoholic in my life has been diagnosed with a serious mental illness. They won't discuss it and surprise surprise, are in denial about it. In so much denial that I was not told about it before the marriage, I found out by coming across some legal papers which contained information about the dia...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha All!! I guess I'll bubble a bit and then slaunter off to bed. The family is still growing!! Step Son and Step Daughter-in-Law are now three and it is sooooo promising cause he has been clean and sober over half his life now and her also. And the new member?....a girl finally!!...and check out her...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

No decision has to bind us forever. Most of us are no longer sure what we want to be doing a year or even a month from now. When we are called upon to make decisions, any decision that commits us to a certain path in the future, we shudder. Will we be allowed to change our minds. What a change this is from earlie...

nmike · nmike

The first decision (posted under Maria's) was to share my recovery program with a friend. Not a good decision. She called me born again and said she didn't understand. I just wanted to let her know that I had found help with my pain. The second decision was thought out by me. If my AHsober calls I need to ha...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Not even an hour after I last posted, any serenity I thought I had come to, got destroyed. I hate that! Makes me feel stupid. I phoned my AH for two purposes. First, I wanted my son to stay at the office for the day since he didn't have school. Second, my youngest had an injury, and given the medical back...

cmarina2001 · cmarina2001

I am working on my recovery (from my eating disorder) and here lately my A has been really big with his words. He has said some of the not so nice things to me. He talked about my weight. Working on getting a job and everytime I have good news he comes in with negative comments. Then is constantly on me on why...

meagain · meagain

I have posted before-but I am so down--my son has called me on Sunday nite and said his wife and her were divorcing. I have me 83 yr. old Mom here-the start of demensia, so I have had such a stressing 4 days...and so many more to come. I love these grandkids so much--have them all the time. My son is saying his...

Aloha · Aloha

I really surprised myself at my meeting last night. We had a newcomer to our meeting, and I actually smiled at him and told him welcome, and then after the meeting gave him a big hug, told him I was glad he was there and to keep coming back! I NEVER do that! I am a person who is terrified of new people. I'...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

...you know I cannot find a single post in all of MIP where someone says: "gee, you know it was a real mistake for me to leave/divorce my alcoholic spouse, I really regret it". Just found that interesting...if I am wrong, please correct me!! Hugs, J. PS: I am in no way saying that this is the b...

angel123 · angel123

Making amends to my spouse seemed an impossible task. I couldn't find the humility or the courage. This article helped me to change my thinking: I love a man, he is a different kind of man than most, He is a special man. Most people do not understand, because he is one of many that are the so called weakling...

Codependent · Codependent

I first just want to say that though I have not posted in a while I do think of everyone often and still read the posts. My A has now been transferred to a maximum security jail because of the violations he incurred that resulted in lock down for the extended period. Now he is double shackeled when allowed o...

Maria123 · Maria123

As many of you know, I have shared Letting go of those not in recovery which I call The Bridge. Letting Go of Those Not In Recovery We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge, it is cold and dark. We stood the...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

My 19 year old AD told me today that this coming weekend is the weekend she is moving out. I know this is her own journey, and I can't save her from herself. I've turned it over and taken it back a dozen times today. It's not that she's moving in with an alcoholic, but she's moving in with an abusive alcoholic...

angel123 · angel123

Thank you all for your prayers and concerns, pertaining to my surgery. I am healing one day at a time. I have so much love in my heart for all of you. I have a good hubby that has helped and took care of me. I sponsor a few people and received so much support for them as well. Alanon is and has bin my life line. So w...

ESH · ESH

I had read in an Alanon book that it is hard to get rid of an alcoholic. I hadn't heard from my A-bf since early February... I thought I was rid of him for good now. And not necessarily by my choosing. I was "fired" by his father. His father left a weird voice mail for me back in February; then I h...

JeannineM · JeannineM

Hello All, I am having a horrible time dealing with all this pain! i can't get me mind off all the drama in my life. I have tried to let go and let god. I am trying really hardbut i feel asif i cant make a move or think until my Ah calls to let me know everything is ok. My husband is not living w/ me and our daughter...

artygirl · artygirl

Hello Alanon family! I haven't posted in a very long time. I've still been here reading once in a while. I wanted to share with you that I'm beginning a new chapter in my life. As many of you know, I left my Alcoholic/cocaine-addicted husband in September 2006 and my divorce was final in March of 2007...

Maria123 · Maria123

(((((((((Shadow)))))))))))))))))), Happy Birthday Girl !!!!! Remember, as Kari will tell us, calories don't count today. I hope your day was a wonderful one!!! love ya, Maria

CJC · CJC

Ok, so I know I've not posted in a while, and a lot of things has been happening medically wise as of here recently...however I have managed to make each one of my F2F meetings except for the last 2 weeks. Which brings me to the question that I have. I contacted my sponsor to let her know that I would be there t...

New Member and Not Sure How to Do This · cmarina2001

I am new to the group. A little bit about myself. I am living with an alcholic but of course he will not see that. Right now I have been battling with an Eating Disorder and have been doing that for a year. when I used to bring up about how I have this addiction and how he needs to get treatment for his addiction...

beth280 · beth280

I've been working on my personal inventory and find myself even more depressed. I hurt someone really bad and I have regretted it ever since (10 years ago). I was living with a guy...a normal guy. He loved me for who I was, never asked for anything from me and treated me like a princess. He had no real vi...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Last night the kids and I went to dinner at my husband's sister's home. His mom, brother and his wife were there too. It has gotten to the point now where only one of us is invited. My AH called to ask his sis a question while we were there and everyone hushed. Wierd. I enjoyed myself, we had wonderful, fun co...

mum2leahnjosh · mum2leahnjosh

He left. I gave him a choice booze or his familey and he left. I cant describ how I feel. Deverstated is a little of an understatment. Feels like he has ripped my heart out and stammped on it. He said he wont let me rule his life he is going to drink with or without me and I expect him to be a man he isnt. He said he d...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

I got a phone call today from a very distraught woman whose husband has returned to drinking. She was crying, full of fear, desperately reaching out hoping someone could fix it, and my heart went out to her. She called me because I am listed as the AA contact for our AA meetings here, but I also qualify for...

Aloha · Aloha

Just fair warning, this is really, REALLY long, and honestly, I think that I'm just working things through in my head as I post this. I had a long, trying and exhausting weekend full of highs and lows. Jeez. I almost think my weekend was bipolar or something. As I've mentioned before, my AH's brothe...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

Its been years. I have struggled and massaged and contorted and tried and suffered and did every thing imaginable regarding puzzling over this question: to stay or to leave. I finally am ready. It just came to me one morning after I woke up: I am ready to move on. I deserve better. Even if I am driven to liv...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Dope habit (Preview) Hello Family, This weekend has been an eye-opener for me, and one that has really proved to me that I am working my programme. However, I have come across some things that have got me thinking about what I should do or shoud not do. Remembering that I have accepted step one - I have no control over my daugh...	Suzannah	3	939	May 4, 2008 by cookie1971
	new member and trying to start with al-anon (Preview) My ah and i have been married for 18 years and together 20. At first the only things we had in common was drinking. I think that should have been my sign. (i grew up with an AF and my mother suffered as us kids did) I really wish i could go back and change what happened and left. we never really talked in the be...	charr	7	652	May 4, 2008 by charr
	my feeling are so raw right now (Preview) I wrote before about my Ds and DIL perhaps separting. I finally had a email from him (after I emailed him ) stating Mom we are OK we just need time. OK what does that mean. Well to me--it means butt out--he will call when he feels ready. So I will not die if I don't see the kids for a few weeks or so. ....Anyway I t...	meagain	1	515	May 4, 2008 by omajoy
	New here... need some support (Preview) I know that I'm married to an A... have known for years, lived in denial that it wasn't that bad... no beating, no trouble with the law, always living paycheck to paycheck.... Then about 2 years ago, he felt like he was having a heart attack and off to the hospital we went... turns out he has acid reflux dis...	amybear	4	647	May 3, 2008 by Jerry F
	HP in charge (Preview) Hi roomies, It has been a while since I've posted. I've had a series of opportunities for growth ... Some things that a few years ago would have upset me terribly, now just seem specially sent to get me to where I am to be. That 4th step that my sponsor and I only got partially through ... an opportunity to...	emma	1	421	May 3, 2008 by Jerry F
	Faith of the heart (Preview) This is just a shout out to all my Alanon sisters and brothers. I hope this song makes your spirits soar :) (from the movie Patch Adams)	Christy	4	395	May 3, 2008 by ddub
	I really don't want to be around these people.. (Preview) My husband wants to go out with this couple and The man is one of the stray dogs he brought home and he wants to me and him to hang out with him and his wife, I told him i don't feel comfortable around those people. It just makes me sick to my stomach. I really hate this guy, i blame him for what he is doing with my h...	charr	4	589	May 3, 2008 by Christy
	Short Update (Preview) First I want to say that it is nice the door is always open here and it feels so right, so welcoming, and so much like home.... Well, my A has been sober two days, he also has made his own doctor's appointment to get back on meds for the bi-polar, without me urging him or pushing him, or telling him he needed to...	marmare	5	476	May 3, 2008 by emma
	I'm new! First Post (Preview) Hi There! I'm here for myself and my children. My husband drinks and smokes pot. For many years he has been using daily. I first realized what a problem it was and what denial I was in about my situation a little over a year ago. I was drinking as well, but not daily. One day, I looked around and saw that...	martin	7	1549	May 3, 2008 by martin
	A couple of updates (Preview) The sun is shining today, and I am filled with gratitude. We will have our next group conscience at AA a week from this coming Wednesday and will discuss Alanon starting up again. I was over at my sponsor's last night, and his wife is also commited to making a go of Alanon, so that is good! I am excited, and I...	Tenderheartsks	2	291	May 3, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	The scorpion and the frog (Preview) Hi all, I recently rediscovered my love and kindness and became once again comfortable with that being my nature. Of course, that is so much due to my program and my wonderful support. I have some incredible direct support from my family, my sponsor and those I guess I could call my chorus of positive...	norwood	5	684	May 3, 2008 by ESH
	A sense of humor helps! (Preview) We have been in a wind advisory today with gusts up to 60 mph. For two years now, I have put up with my neighbor to the west who has a crappy old metal shed that isn't anchored down. It keeps blowing into my fencing. Today was the final straw as her idea of 'anchoring' it down was putting railroad ties laying d...	Tenderheartsks	7	971	May 3, 2008 by ESH
	repeating patterns (Preview) Ever feel like you are running in circles or yup, hitting your head against the wall? Yeah, me too. Awareness, acceptance, action again & again. Things change but not anything that makes a different result. Maybe I can figure this out with writing now or MIP help so...... ah is courteous, kin...	ddub	2	336	May 3, 2008 by ESH
	Irritated (Preview) Hello friends, I am just trying to hold on and let my AH do what he does and not react. But boy is he pushing my buttons this am. He was supposed to get up at six (my son had to wake him) and take our son to his SATs. I t o l d him the time frame he had planned was cutting it close, but does he listen? Well it is out...	DeadOrAlive	1	306	May 3, 2008 by debilyn
	Thank you for your prayers (Preview) Weeks ago someone posted about a friend who died of alcoholism and asked if anyone wanted prayers for someone we hold dear who is in the same boat. I asked prayers for my brother and have received some feedback from our members assuring me they are praying for him. I have found this such a comfort during t...	Jill	2	466	May 2, 2008 by Jerry F
	Why did I settle for so little for so long? (Preview) It's hard to reflect back over my life and comprehend just how little I settled for throughout my adult life. I was born to two very loving, caring parents, neither alcoholics, but along with their union in marriage came the baggage of generations of alcoholics on both sides. I was a very shy kid growin...	Tenderheartsks	4	734	May 2, 2008 by nmike
	Emtion overload (Preview) Its been 2 weeks since I saw my A most of the time I am doing o.k life is a lot more manageable. Feel like I am heading in right direction. But then the emotions take over anger one minute, lonely the next, scared so scared. How can he have ever loved me why hasn;t he called to apologise for letting me down aga...	Tracy	3	454	May 2, 2008 by maresie
	May Business meeting--- Hehe let's party!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingMay 4, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...	Mandy123	2	584	May 2, 2008 by norwood
	Really good meeting! (Preview) I thank God for the two good meetings I went to this week. I learned so much from other peoples shares. I really didn't think I would ever have any idea why I feel so incomplete or "not as good as" the rest of the world. I now have some idea and realized that there is a higher power that (not only CAN...	glad	1	291	May 2, 2008 by Gailey
	help help help (Preview) please someone shoot me end the pain. i am currently at my in-laws house pickin up my daughter. My Ah is here right now and is piss drunk. he is currently screaming, falling over and blaming everything on me. he is in the basement talking to his father. my daughter is down the park with my mother-in-law....	JeannineM	9	625	May 2, 2008 by glad
	Is it AA or the highway? (Preview) I need some ESH on this guys.... how do you deal with an A who's not in denial anymore, but still isn't exactly in recovery? My A fiance is going to therapy and genuinely trying to work out his issues and figure out his disease, etc. Of course he won't go to AA. There's a million excuses, but the bottom line i...	intothewoods	7	1019	May 2, 2008 by Aloha
	Not doing well (Preview) After the emotional weekend I had with my AH, I've just been feeling pretty low and beat down. I'm thinking part of it is hormones - PMS time for me. I imagine PMS must feel something similar to how it feels when an A isn't drinking. I'm restless and irritable and I go through high highs and low lows. I've be...	Aloha	11	474	May 2, 2008 by Tracy
	Busy Busy week....lots of changes (Preview) Hello All, have not posted in a week or so but have kept up on the reading here....always such a big help...seems like when Im about at the end of my rope I can come here and read for a bit and it helps to calm me. LOTS of changes in my household the past week or so....I made up my mind that I will no longer do th...	acjmom	2	335	May 2, 2008 by maresie
	What else can I do? (Preview) Thankyou for the posts from the other nite. I have tried to call my son re: separting from his wife. I left messages on his cell phone. I don't want to call his home-I feel that I would be interfering with his wife and him. I would love to take the kids for the evening...........I am trying to LEt Go and Let G...	meagain	4	520	May 2, 2008 by maresie
	Celebrating an engagement! (Preview) Some of you will remember that I first came here, devastated by the relationship I had with my daughter, well to be honest the relationship I did NOT have with my daughter. Since then I have been learning how to focus on me; to change the things I could in me and accept the things I could not change in her. I...	Suzannah	10	465	May 2, 2008 by ddub
	Back From Vegas (Preview) (((((Family))))) Well I'm back home again. We had a great flight both ways. I must say, I was worried for nothing. I truly had a good time. My daughter enjoyed her birthday , and I didn't have to end up being a third wheel with her and her boyfriend Hubby was on his best behavior, going out of his way to make m...	cookie1971	5	483	May 2, 2008 by ddub
	ftf meetings (Preview) I just went to my first AA meeting despite not being an A. I bawled through most of the meeting. I caused the woman that was heading hte meeting enough that she wanted to talk to me afterwards. She told me about Alateen and Alanon. Once I got up the urge to speak to her (I had kept saying to my friend, Nate, I do...	Lanchas	3	441	May 2, 2008 by Jean4444
	very new to this, have questions (Preview) I've been with my A husband for almost 10 years. We've had 3 children with one on the way. I'm pretty much at my wit's end with him. After reading this board for the last few days I see I am pretty much a textbook A wife/sig. other. His biggest complaint about me is I'm a control freak. (in his words) I've alwa...	Momto4	8	664	May 2, 2008 by ddub
	I'm going (Preview) To an Al-Anon meeting next Monday evening. I posted late last week my story, and thank you to everyone that responded, I did some more reserach on Al Anon, and after thinking about it and talking with my counsellor today who helped me to realize my H is alchohol dependant (he is a functioning alcoholic,...	doublesmommy	11	632	May 1, 2008 by ddub
	Thank you! (Preview) (((((((((((Family)))))))), Thank you all for the wonderful birthday wishes. It was indeed a lovely day. Even though the sun was shining we pretended it was a rainy day. We stayed home, watched movies and ate . I made all of my favorite foods with lots of butter. Julia Child had nothing on me that d...	Karilynn	5	363	May 1, 2008 by maresie
	Update on me... (Preview) Today is my Friday! (assuming you don't count my 2nd job in which case Saturday is my Friday LOL) Next time I come here I will be a divorced woman! For those of you who know my story you're probably saying it's about dang time!!! ;) Monday is the court date to finalize the divorce and give me full custo...	carolinagirl	3	355	May 1, 2008 by maresie
	What if? (Preview) I'm so blessed to have this board. I've been reading so many of the posts lately - and so many apply to my situation. (HP????) As many of you know...my on-again off-again on-again off-again 30 year romance with my A seems to be on again - albeit from a great distance. But he's been talking to me about...	round3	10	550	May 1, 2008 by round3
	abandoned again (Preview) Hello Everyone, I wanted to say thank you for all the replies and suggestions I have received fromall of you. Next, i don't even know where to start I cannot think or function anymore? I think I am on auto cruise control or something. It's like I am in a fog. The only thing I can do is get up (barely) get ...	JeannineM	6	478	May 1, 2008 by glad lee
	The Butterfly Story (Preview) The Butterfly Story Before this great change comes about, The fuzzy little worm withdraws from its caterpillar world, an finds itself a place alone ,and there painfully, and with much struggling, it wraps itself tightly into a cocoon of its own making; It literally seals itself from the world. Days...	angel123	0	2200	May 1, 2008 by angel123
	The Chicken or the Egg (Preview) The alcoholic in my life has been diagnosed with a serious mental illness. They won't discuss it and surprise surprise, are in denial about it. In so much denial that I was not told about it before the marriage, I found out by coming across some legal papers which contained information about the dia...	ThisIsBlythe	6	640	May 1, 2008 by serendipity
	More miracles...gosh darnit!! (Preview) Aloha All!! I guess I'll bubble a bit and then slaunter off to bed. The family is still growing!! Step Son and Step Daughter-in-Law are now three and it is sooooo promising cause he has been clean and sober over half his life now and her also. And the new member?....a girl finally!!...and check out her...	Jerry F	11	602	May 1, 2008 by Jen
	meditation for today from hazelden (Preview) No decision has to bind us forever. Most of us are no longer sure what we want to be doing a year or even a month from now. When we are called upon to make decisions, any decision that commits us to a certain path in the future, we shudder. Will we be allowed to change our minds. What a change this is from earlie...	Tiger2006	2	874	May 1, 2008 by cookie1971
	Made two decisions (Preview) The first decision (posted under Maria's) was to share my recovery program with a friend. Not a good decision. She called me born again and said she didn't understand. I just wanted to let her know that I had found help with my pain. The second decision was thought out by me. If my AHsober calls I need to ha...	nmike	5	436	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	it only takes one little thing... (Preview) Not even an hour after I last posted, any serenity I thought I had come to, got destroyed. I hate that! Makes me feel stupid. I phoned my AH for two purposes. First, I wanted my son to stay at the office for the day since he didn't have school. Second, my youngest had an injury, and given the medical back...	Loupiness	6	564	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	Why are they so hurtful? (Preview) I am working on my recovery (from my eating disorder) and here lately my A has been really big with his words. He has said some of the not so nice things to me. He talked about my weight. Working on getting a job and everytime I have good news he comes in with negative comments. Then is constantly on me on why...	cmarina2001	5	584	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	Has anyone gone through this?-I sooo h=need help! (Preview) I have posted before-but I am so down--my son has called me on Sunday nite and said his wife and her were divorcing. I have me 83 yr. old Mom here-the start of demensia, so I have had such a stressing 4 days...and so many more to come. I love these grandkids so much--have them all the time. My son is saying his...	meagain	3	782	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	I'm opening up (Preview) I really surprised myself at my meeting last night. We had a newcomer to our meeting, and I actually smiled at him and told him welcome, and then after the meeting gave him a big hug, told him I was glad he was there and to keep coming back! I NEVER do that! I am a person who is terrified of new people. I'...	Aloha	5	352	Apr 30, 2008 by serendipity
	Interesting... (Preview) ...you know I cannot find a single post in all of MIP where someone says: "gee, you know it was a real mistake for me to leave/divorce my alcoholic spouse, I really regret it". Just found that interesting...if I am wrong, please correct me!! Hugs, J. PS: I am in no way saying that this is the b...	Jean4444	8	531	Apr 30, 2008 by serendipity
	making Amends to my spouse (Preview) Making amends to my spouse seemed an impossible task. I couldn't find the humility or the courage. This article helped me to change my thinking: I love a man, he is a different kind of man than most, He is a special man. Most people do not understand, because he is one of many that are the so called weakling...	angel123	2	622	Apr 30, 2008 by Jen
	Compassion and Courage (Preview) I first just want to say that though I have not posted in a while I do think of everyone often and still read the posts. My A has now been transferred to a maximum security jail because of the violations he incurred that resulted in lock down for the extended period. Now he is double shackeled when allowed o...	Codependent	3	489	Apr 30, 2008 by carolinagirl
	I went over “The Bridge” (Preview) As many of you know, I have shared Letting go of those not in recovery which I call The Bridge. *Letting Go of Those Not In Recovery* We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge, it is cold and dark. We stood the...	Maria123	7	732	Apr 29, 2008 by wp
	Tough day today (Preview) My 19 year old AD told me today that this coming weekend is the weekend she is moving out. I know this is her own journey, and I can't save her from herself. I've turned it over and taken it back a dozen times today. It's not that she's moving in with an alcoholic, but she's moving in with an abusive alcoholic...	Tenderheartsks	3	369	Apr 29, 2008 by maresie
	ty your concerns and prayers (Preview) Thank you all for your prayers and concerns, pertaining to my surgery. I am healing one day at a time. I have so much love in my heart for all of you. I have a good hubby that has helped and took care of me. I sponsor a few people and received so much support for them as well. Alanon is and has bin my life line. So w...	angel123	0	506	Apr 29, 2008 by angel123
	It's true... it is hard to get rid of your alcoholic (Preview) I had read in an Alanon book that it is hard to get rid of an alcoholic. I hadn't heard from my A-bf since early February... I thought I was rid of him for good now. And not necessarily by my choosing. I was "fired" by his father. His father left a weird voice mail for me back in February; then I h...	ESH	3	677	Apr 29, 2008 by maresie
	what's wrong with me? (Preview) Hello All, I am having a horrible time dealing with all this pain! i can't get me mind off all the drama in my life. I have tried to let go and let god. I am trying really hardbut i feel asif i cant make a move or think until my Ah calls to let me know everything is ok. My husband is not living w/ me and our daughter...	JeannineM	7	409	Apr 29, 2008 by Tracy
	A new beginning... (Preview) Hello Alanon family! I haven't posted in a very long time. I've still been here reading once in a while. I wanted to share with you that I'm beginning a new chapter in my life. As many of you know, I left my Alcoholic/cocaine-addicted husband in September 2006 and my divorce was final in March of 2007...	artygirl	7	485	Apr 29, 2008 by Tracy
	Another April Birthday Girl !!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) (((((((((Shadow)))))))))))))))))), Happy Birthday Girl !!!!! Remember, as Kari will tell us, calories don't count today. I hope your day was a wonderful one!!! love ya, Maria	Maria123	5	410	Apr 29, 2008 by Diva
	Sponsorship... (Preview) Ok, so I know I've not posted in a while, and a lot of things has been happening medically wise as of here recently...however I have managed to make each one of my F2F meetings except for the last 2 weeks. Which brings me to the question that I have. I contacted my sponsor to let her know that I would be there t...	CJC	4	412	Apr 29, 2008 by thinkstoomuch
	New Member and Not Sure How to Do This (Preview) I am new to the group. A little bit about myself. I am living with an alcholic but of course he will not see that. Right now I have been battling with an Eating Disorder and have been doing that for a year. when I used to bring up about how I have this addiction and how he needs to get treatment for his addiction...	cmarina2001	5	488	Apr 29, 2008 by maresie
	This could get long (Preview) I've been working on my personal inventory and find myself even more depressed. I hurt someone really bad and I have regretted it ever since (10 years ago). I was living with a guy...a normal guy. He loved me for who I was, never asked for anything from me and treated me like a princess. He had no real vi...	beth280	5	575	Apr 29, 2008 by ally
	Accepting what is... (Preview) Last night the kids and I went to dinner at my husband's sister's home. His mom, brother and his wife were there too. It has gotten to the point now where only one of us is invited. My AH called to ask his sis a question while we were there and everyone hushed. Wierd. I enjoyed myself, we had wonderful, fun co...	Loupiness	5	474	Apr 29, 2008 by maresie
	Deverstated!!!! (Preview) He left. I gave him a choice booze or his familey and he left. I cant describ how I feel. Deverstated is a little of an understatment. Feels like he has ripped my heart out and stammped on it. He said he wont let me rule his life he is going to drink with or without me and I expect him to be a man he isnt. He said he d...	mum2leahnjosh	11	542	Apr 29, 2008 by maire rua
	Is my HP trying to tell me something? (Preview) I got a phone call today from a very distraught woman whose husband has returned to drinking. She was crying, full of fear, desperately reaching out hoping someone could fix it, and my heart went out to her. She called me because I am listed as the AA contact for our AA meetings here, but I also qualify for...	Tenderheartsks	6	586	Apr 29, 2008 by Gailey
	A long, exhausting weekend (Preview) Just fair warning, this is really, REALLY long, and honestly, I think that I'm just working things through in my head as I post this. I had a long, trying and exhausting weekend full of highs and lows. Jeez. I almost think my weekend was bipolar or something. As I've mentioned before, my AH's brothe...	Aloha	9	520	Apr 29, 2008 by Jerry F
	I am finally ready to get a divorce! (Preview) Its been years. I have struggled and massaged and contorted and tried and suffered and did every thing imaginable regarding puzzling over this question: to stay or to leave. I finally am ready. It just came to me one morning after I woke up: I am ready to move on. I deserve better. Even if I am driven to liv...	Jean4444	10	732	Apr 29, 2008 by Loupiness
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.