Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Tracy · Tracy

We have choices we can leave we can love and take care of ourselves My A has only been gone for 2 and a half weeks. Let me down got drunk has not been in touch since. You see I have not rung him but would I be back in the cycle if he had rung me. Why didnt I get out earlier Why do I look after everyone and not me my needs...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I've been in this program a year and pretty sure I know the answer, but then I resort back to my controlling ways and think that this situation may be "different". Yeah, right. If nothing else, typing it out her may clarify things for me. My brother is an A. I haven't posted much about him bec...

Jorbax · Jorbax

I allowed my 58 yr old Alcoholic Brother tomove in w/ us. I thought he was rock bottom and thought this was a new beginning for him. Spent 6 months last year in jail for 4th dui...... Ha! We are 9 out of the past 11 days w/ him coming home drunk. We have 2 children and my 80 yr old Mother (w/ Alzheimer's)...

JeannineM · JeannineM

Hello everyone and thanks again for the replies. I wanted to know where I start. I am unable to get to a face to face meetings I have tried to find ones that allow children but w/o success. I am to the website out of complete desire for a way to help myself and get some answers and vent when i have to. All of y...

shebear · shebear

Hi, folks. You would think I'd have recognized the signs, coming from a family where pretty much all the men are either alcoholics or addicts. But here I am at 45 married to an alcoholic in denial, and his defense is "I'm not that bad." No, he doesn't beat me, nor pee in inappropriate places (A...

acjmom · acjmom

I have been talking to the A about trying to work things out, and Im not sure if that is what I want or not, he says (AGAIN) he is willing to really work a program this time but does not feel AA is for him....but wouldnt mind going to Al-Anon with me, which, he is the son and bro of an A...so I guess he DOES in a way...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

Hey guys, so, I am petitioning the court to allow me to move out of state with my daughter. The people closest to me are cautioning me because the attitude I am portraying is one of confidence and peace. I am being told I have my head in the clouds because even though I have my opinions about how my ex is wit...

omajoy · omajoy

While looking back to May 2, 2007, in my pocket calendar I realized I was coming home from the hospital from my third chemo treatment. I was quite ill and quite BALD.....I had not one hair on my head, no eyebrows, or anywhere else!!! Ahead of me lay fourth hospital stay for more chemo in ten days and aft...

Maria123 · Maria123

Friends, I just had to share this with y'all. Thank goodness for this program. I am recovering one day at a time from the craziness I was involved in, perpetuated, and had no control of. Last week I was working on a part of my recovery. I had a habit that I wanted to break (nothing dramatic) just somethi...

barisax · barisax

Do you post when you are in a crisis and desperate? Do you post when in transition and feeling confused? Do you post when you are bored? Do you post when you're feeling good and want to share? Do you post when something newsworthy happens in your program? Or your life in general? I guess I post when I f...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Hello Family, This weekend has been an eye-opener for me, and one that has really proved to me that I am working my programme. However, I have come across some things that have got me thinking about what I should do or shoud not do. Remembering that I have accepted step one - I have no control over my daugh...

charr · charr

My ah and i have been married for 18 years and together 20. At first the only things we had in common was drinking. I think that should have been my sign. (i grew up with an AF and my mother suffered as us kids did) I really wish i could go back and change what happened and left. we never really talked in the be...

meagain · meagain

I wrote before about my Ds and DIL perhaps separting. I finally had a email from him (after I emailed him ) stating Mom we are OK we just need time. OK what does that mean. Well to me--it means butt out--he will call when he feels ready. So I will not die if I don't see the kids for a few weeks or so. ....Anyway I t...

amybear · amybear

I know that I'm married to an A... have known for years, lived in denial that it wasn't that bad... no beating, no trouble with the law, always living paycheck to paycheck.... Then about 2 years ago, he felt like he was having a heart attack and off to the hospital we went... turns out he has acid reflux dis...

emma · emma

Hi roomies, It has been a while since I've posted. I've had a series of opportunities for growth ... Some things that a few years ago would have upset me terribly, now just seem specially sent to get me to where I am to be. That 4th step that my sponsor and I only got partially through ... an opportunity to...

Christy · Christy

This is just a shout out to all my Alanon sisters and brothers. I hope this song makes your spirits soar :) (from the movie Patch Adams)

charr · charr

My husband wants to go out with this couple and The man is one of the stray dogs he brought home and he wants to me and him to hang out with him and his wife, I told him i don't feel comfortable around those people. It just makes me sick to my stomach. I really hate this guy, i blame him for what he is doing with my h...

marmare · marmare

First I want to say that it is nice the door is always open here and it feels so right, so welcoming, and so much like home.... Well, my A has been sober two days, he also has made his own doctor's appointment to get back on meds for the bi-polar, without me urging him or pushing him, or telling him he needed to...

martin · martin

Hi There! I'm here for myself and my children. My husband drinks and smokes pot. For many years he has been using daily. I first realized what a problem it was and what denial I was in about my situation a little over a year ago. I was drinking as well, but not daily. One day, I looked around and saw that...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

The sun is shining today, and I am filled with gratitude. We will have our next group conscience at AA a week from this coming Wednesday and will discuss Alanon starting up again. I was over at my sponsor's last night, and his wife is also commited to making a go of Alanon, so that is good! I am excited, and I...

norwood · norwood

Hi all, I recently rediscovered my love and kindness and became once again comfortable with that being my nature. Of course, that is so much due to my program and my wonderful support. I have some incredible direct support from my family, my sponsor and those I guess I could call my chorus of positive...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

We have been in a wind advisory today with gusts up to 60 mph. For two years now, I have put up with my neighbor to the west who has a crappy old metal shed that isn't anchored down. It keeps blowing into my fencing. Today was the final straw as her idea of 'anchoring' it down was putting railroad ties laying d...

ddub · ddub

Ever feel like you are running in circles or yup, hitting your head against the wall? Yeah, me too. Awareness, acceptance, action again & again. Things change but not anything that makes a different result. Maybe I can figure this out with writing now or MIP help so...... ah is courteous, kin...

DeadOrAlive · DeadOrAlive

Hello friends, I am just trying to hold on and let my AH do what he does and not react. But boy is he pushing my buttons this am. He was supposed to get up at six (my son had to wake him) and take our son to his SATs. I t o l d him the time frame he had planned was cutting it close, but does he listen? Well it is out...

Jill · Jill

Weeks ago someone posted about a friend who died of alcoholism and asked if anyone wanted prayers for someone we hold dear who is in the same boat. I asked prayers for my brother and have received some feedback from our members assuring me they are praying for him. I have found this such a comfort during t...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

It's hard to reflect back over my life and comprehend just how little I settled for throughout my adult life. I was born to two very loving, caring parents, neither alcoholics, but along with their union in marriage came the baggage of generations of alcoholics on both sides. I was a very shy kid growin...

Tracy · Tracy

Its been 2 weeks since I saw my A most of the time I am doing o.k life is a lot more manageable. Feel like I am heading in right direction. But then the emotions take over anger one minute, lonely the next, scared so scared. How can he have ever loved me why hasn;t he called to apologise for letting me down aga...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingMay 4, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...

glad · glad

I thank God for the two good meetings I went to this week. I learned so much from other peoples shares. I really didn't think I would ever have any idea why I feel so incomplete or "not as good as" the rest of the world. I now have some idea and realized that there is a higher power that (not only CAN...

JeannineM · JeannineM

please someone shoot me end the pain. i am currently at my in-laws house pickin up my daughter. My Ah is here right now and is piss drunk. he is currently screaming, falling over and blaming everything on me. he is in the basement talking to his father. my daughter is down the park with my mother-in-law....

intothewoods · intothewoods

I need some ESH on this guys.... how do you deal with an A who's not in denial anymore, but still isn't exactly in recovery? My A fiance is going to therapy and genuinely trying to work out his issues and figure out his disease, etc. Of course he won't go to AA. There's a million excuses, but the bottom line i...

Aloha · Aloha

After the emotional weekend I had with my AH, I've just been feeling pretty low and beat down. I'm thinking part of it is hormones - PMS time for me. I imagine PMS must feel something similar to how it feels when an A isn't drinking. I'm restless and irritable and I go through high highs and low lows. I've be...

acjmom · acjmom

Hello All, have not posted in a week or so but have kept up on the reading here....always such a big help...seems like when Im about at the end of my rope I can come here and read for a bit and it helps to calm me. LOTS of changes in my household the past week or so....I made up my mind that I will no longer do th...

meagain · meagain

Thankyou for the posts from the other nite. I have tried to call my son re: separting from his wife. I left messages on his cell phone. I don't want to call his home-I feel that I would be interfering with his wife and him. I would love to take the kids for the evening...........I am trying to LEt Go and Let G...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Some of you will remember that I first came here, devastated by the relationship I had with my daughter, well to be honest the relationship I did NOT have with my daughter. Since then I have been learning how to focus on me; to change the things I could in me and accept the things I could not change in her. I...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

(((((Family))))) Well I'm back home again. We had a great flight both ways. I must say, I was worried for nothing. I truly had a good time. My daughter enjoyed her birthday , and I didn't have to end up being a third wheel with her and her boyfriend Hubby was on his best behavior, going out of his way to make m...

Lanchas · Lanchas

I just went to my first AA meeting despite not being an A. I bawled through most of the meeting. I caused the woman that was heading hte meeting enough that she wanted to talk to me afterwards. She told me about Alateen and Alanon. Once I got up the urge to speak to her (I had kept saying to my friend, Nate, I do...

Momto4 · Momto4

I've been with my A husband for almost 10 years. We've had 3 children with one on the way. I'm pretty much at my wit's end with him. After reading this board for the last few days I see I am pretty much a textbook A wife/sig. other. His biggest complaint about me is I'm a control freak. (in his words) I've alwa...

doublesmommy · doublesmommy

To an Al-Anon meeting next Monday evening. I posted late last week my story, and thank you to everyone that responded, I did some more reserach on Al Anon, and after thinking about it and talking with my counsellor today who helped me to realize my H is alchohol dependant (he is a functioning alcoholic,...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((Family)))))))), Thank you all for the wonderful birthday wishes. It was indeed a lovely day. Even though the sun was shining we pretended it was a rainy day. We stayed home, watched movies and ate . I made all of my favorite foods with lots of butter. Julia Child had nothing on me that d...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Today is my Friday! (assuming you don't count my 2nd job in which case Saturday is my Friday LOL) Next time I come here I will be a divorced woman! For those of you who know my story you're probably saying it's about dang time!!! ;) Monday is the court date to finalize the divorce and give me full custo...

round3 · round3

I'm so blessed to have this board. I've been reading so many of the posts lately - and so many apply to my situation. (HP????) As many of you know...my on-again off-again on-again off-again 30 year romance with my A seems to be on again - albeit from a great distance. But he's been talking to me about...

JeannineM · JeannineM

Hello Everyone, I wanted to say thank you for all the replies and suggestions I have received fromall of you. Next, i don't even know where to start I cannot think or function anymore? I think I am on auto cruise control or something. It's like I am in a fog. The only thing I can do is get up (barely) get ...

angel123 · angel123

The Butterfly Story Before this great change comes about, The fuzzy little worm withdraws from its caterpillar world, an finds itself a place alone ,and there painfully, and with much struggling, it wraps itself tightly into a cocoon of its own making; It literally seals itself from the world. Days...

ThisIsBlythe · ThisIsBlythe

The alcoholic in my life has been diagnosed with a serious mental illness. They won't discuss it and surprise surprise, are in denial about it. In so much denial that I was not told about it before the marriage, I found out by coming across some legal papers which contained information about the dia...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha All!! I guess I'll bubble a bit and then slaunter off to bed. The family is still growing!! Step Son and Step Daughter-in-Law are now three and it is sooooo promising cause he has been clean and sober over half his life now and her also. And the new member?....a girl finally!!...and check out her...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

No decision has to bind us forever. Most of us are no longer sure what we want to be doing a year or even a month from now. When we are called upon to make decisions, any decision that commits us to a certain path in the future, we shudder. Will we be allowed to change our minds. What a change this is from earlie...

nmike · nmike

The first decision (posted under Maria's) was to share my recovery program with a friend. Not a good decision. She called me born again and said she didn't understand. I just wanted to let her know that I had found help with my pain. The second decision was thought out by me. If my AHsober calls I need to ha...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Not even an hour after I last posted, any serenity I thought I had come to, got destroyed. I hate that! Makes me feel stupid. I phoned my AH for two purposes. First, I wanted my son to stay at the office for the day since he didn't have school. Second, my youngest had an injury, and given the medical back...

cmarina2001 · cmarina2001

I am working on my recovery (from my eating disorder) and here lately my A has been really big with his words. He has said some of the not so nice things to me. He talked about my weight. Working on getting a job and everytime I have good news he comes in with negative comments. Then is constantly on me on why...

meagain · meagain

I have posted before-but I am so down--my son has called me on Sunday nite and said his wife and her were divorcing. I have me 83 yr. old Mom here-the start of demensia, so I have had such a stressing 4 days...and so many more to come. I love these grandkids so much--have them all the time. My son is saying his...

Aloha · Aloha

I really surprised myself at my meeting last night. We had a newcomer to our meeting, and I actually smiled at him and told him welcome, and then after the meeting gave him a big hug, told him I was glad he was there and to keep coming back! I NEVER do that! I am a person who is terrified of new people. I'...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

...you know I cannot find a single post in all of MIP where someone says: "gee, you know it was a real mistake for me to leave/divorce my alcoholic spouse, I really regret it". Just found that interesting...if I am wrong, please correct me!! Hugs, J. PS: I am in no way saying that this is the b...

angel123 · angel123

Making amends to my spouse seemed an impossible task. I couldn't find the humility or the courage. This article helped me to change my thinking: I love a man, he is a different kind of man than most, He is a special man. Most people do not understand, because he is one of many that are the so called weakling...

Codependent · Codependent

I first just want to say that though I have not posted in a while I do think of everyone often and still read the posts. My A has now been transferred to a maximum security jail because of the violations he incurred that resulted in lock down for the extended period. Now he is double shackeled when allowed o...

Maria123 · Maria123

As many of you know, I have shared Letting go of those not in recovery which I call The Bridge. Letting Go of Those Not In Recovery We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge, it is cold and dark. We stood the...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

My 19 year old AD told me today that this coming weekend is the weekend she is moving out. I know this is her own journey, and I can't save her from herself. I've turned it over and taken it back a dozen times today. It's not that she's moving in with an alcoholic, but she's moving in with an abusive alcoholic...

angel123 · angel123

Thank you all for your prayers and concerns, pertaining to my surgery. I am healing one day at a time. I have so much love in my heart for all of you. I have a good hubby that has helped and took care of me. I sponsor a few people and received so much support for them as well. Alanon is and has bin my life line. So w...

ESH · ESH

I had read in an Alanon book that it is hard to get rid of an alcoholic. I hadn't heard from my A-bf since early February... I thought I was rid of him for good now. And not necessarily by my choosing. I was "fired" by his father. His father left a weird voice mail for me back in February; then I h...

JeannineM · JeannineM

Hello All, I am having a horrible time dealing with all this pain! i can't get me mind off all the drama in my life. I have tried to let go and let god. I am trying really hardbut i feel asif i cant make a move or think until my Ah calls to let me know everything is ok. My husband is not living w/ me and our daughter...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Courage to change (Preview) We have choices we can leave we can love and take care of ourselves My A has only been gone for 2 and a half weeks. Let me down got drunk has not been in touch since. You see I have not rung him but would I be back in the cycle if he had rung me. Why didnt I get out earlier Why do I look after everyone and not me my needs...	Tracy	5	554	May 6, 2008 by maresie
	just gotta ask.. (Preview) I've been in this program a year and pretty sure I know the answer, but then I resort back to my controlling ways and think that this situation may be "different". Yeah, right. If nothing else, typing it out her may clarify things for me. My brother is an A. I haven't posted much about him bec...	Loupiness	7	510	May 6, 2008 by Loupiness
	How do I do this? Help...... (Preview) I allowed my 58 yr old Alcoholic Brother tomove in w/ us. I thought he was rock bottom and thought this was a new beginning for him. Spent 6 months last year in jail for 4th dui...... Ha! We are 9 out of the past 11 days w/ him coming home drunk. We have 2 children and my 80 yr old Mother (w/ Alzheimer's)...	Jorbax	4	815	May 6, 2008 by Karilynn
	where do i start? (Preview) Hello everyone and thanks again for the replies. I wanted to know where I start. I am unable to get to a face to face meetings I have tried to find ones that allow children but w/o success. I am to the website out of complete desire for a way to help myself and get some answers and vent when i have to. All of y...	JeannineM	5	694	May 5, 2008 by maresie
	How bad is bad enough? (Preview) Hi, folks. You would think I'd have recognized the signs, coming from a family where pretty much all the men are either alcoholics or addicts. But here I am at 45 married to an alcoholic in denial, and his defense is "I'm not that bad." No, he doesn't beat me, nor pee in inappropriate places (A...	shebear	9	694	May 5, 2008 by canadianguy
	Just wondering (Preview) I have been talking to the A about trying to work things out, and Im not sure if that is what I want or not, he says (AGAIN) he is willing to really work a program this time but does not feel AA is for him....but wouldnt mind going to Al-Anon with me, which, he is the son and bro of an A...so I guess he DOES in a way...	acjmom	4	505	May 5, 2008 by maresie
	Is it pride, stupidity, or???? (Preview) Hey guys, so, I am petitioning the court to allow me to move out of state with my daughter. The people closest to me are cautioning me because the attitude I am portraying is one of confidence and peace. I am being told I have my head in the clouds because even though I have my opinions about how my ex is wit...	seekingserenity	5	682	May 5, 2008 by thinkstoomuch
	gratitude (Preview) While looking back to May 2, 2007, in my pocket calendar I realized I was coming home from the hospital from my third chemo treatment. I was quite ill and quite BALD.....I had not one hair on my head, no eyebrows, or anywhere else!!! Ahead of me lay fourth hospital stay for more chemo in ten days and aft...	omajoy	7	524	May 5, 2008 by Gailey
	My Son Rocks!!!! (Preview) Friends, I just had to share this with y'all. Thank goodness for this program. I am recovering one day at a time from the craziness I was involved in, perpetuated, and had no control of. Last week I was working on a part of my recovery. I had a habit that I wanted to break (nothing dramatic) just somethi...	Maria123	10	507	May 4, 2008 by cookie1971
	When Do You Post? Yet another thread spin-off (Preview) Do you post when you are in a crisis and desperate? Do you post when in transition and feeling confused? Do you post when you are bored? Do you post when you're feeling good and want to share? Do you post when something newsworthy happens in your program? Or your life in general? I guess I post when I f...	barisax	7	666	May 4, 2008 by cookie1971
	Dope habit (Preview) Hello Family, This weekend has been an eye-opener for me, and one that has really proved to me that I am working my programme. However, I have come across some things that have got me thinking about what I should do or shoud not do. Remembering that I have accepted step one - I have no control over my daugh...	Suzannah	3	950	May 4, 2008 by cookie1971
	new member and trying to start with al-anon (Preview) My ah and i have been married for 18 years and together 20. At first the only things we had in common was drinking. I think that should have been my sign. (i grew up with an AF and my mother suffered as us kids did) I really wish i could go back and change what happened and left. we never really talked in the be...	charr	7	664	May 4, 2008 by charr
	my feeling are so raw right now (Preview) I wrote before about my Ds and DIL perhaps separting. I finally had a email from him (after I emailed him ) stating Mom we are OK we just need time. OK what does that mean. Well to me--it means butt out--he will call when he feels ready. So I will not die if I don't see the kids for a few weeks or so. ....Anyway I t...	meagain	1	531	May 4, 2008 by omajoy
	New here... need some support (Preview) I know that I'm married to an A... have known for years, lived in denial that it wasn't that bad... no beating, no trouble with the law, always living paycheck to paycheck.... Then about 2 years ago, he felt like he was having a heart attack and off to the hospital we went... turns out he has acid reflux dis...	amybear	4	663	May 3, 2008 by Jerry F
	HP in charge (Preview) Hi roomies, It has been a while since I've posted. I've had a series of opportunities for growth ... Some things that a few years ago would have upset me terribly, now just seem specially sent to get me to where I am to be. That 4th step that my sponsor and I only got partially through ... an opportunity to...	emma	1	431	May 3, 2008 by Jerry F
	Faith of the heart (Preview) This is just a shout out to all my Alanon sisters and brothers. I hope this song makes your spirits soar :) (from the movie Patch Adams)	Christy	4	408	May 3, 2008 by ddub
	I really don't want to be around these people.. (Preview) My husband wants to go out with this couple and The man is one of the stray dogs he brought home and he wants to me and him to hang out with him and his wife, I told him i don't feel comfortable around those people. It just makes me sick to my stomach. I really hate this guy, i blame him for what he is doing with my h...	charr	4	601	May 3, 2008 by Christy
	Short Update (Preview) First I want to say that it is nice the door is always open here and it feels so right, so welcoming, and so much like home.... Well, my A has been sober two days, he also has made his own doctor's appointment to get back on meds for the bi-polar, without me urging him or pushing him, or telling him he needed to...	marmare	5	486	May 3, 2008 by emma
	I'm new! First Post (Preview) Hi There! I'm here for myself and my children. My husband drinks and smokes pot. For many years he has been using daily. I first realized what a problem it was and what denial I was in about my situation a little over a year ago. I was drinking as well, but not daily. One day, I looked around and saw that...	martin	7	1570	May 3, 2008 by martin
	A couple of updates (Preview) The sun is shining today, and I am filled with gratitude. We will have our next group conscience at AA a week from this coming Wednesday and will discuss Alanon starting up again. I was over at my sponsor's last night, and his wife is also commited to making a go of Alanon, so that is good! I am excited, and I...	Tenderheartsks	2	302	May 3, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	The scorpion and the frog (Preview) Hi all, I recently rediscovered my love and kindness and became once again comfortable with that being my nature. Of course, that is so much due to my program and my wonderful support. I have some incredible direct support from my family, my sponsor and those I guess I could call my chorus of positive...	norwood	5	698	May 3, 2008 by ESH
	A sense of humor helps! (Preview) We have been in a wind advisory today with gusts up to 60 mph. For two years now, I have put up with my neighbor to the west who has a crappy old metal shed that isn't anchored down. It keeps blowing into my fencing. Today was the final straw as her idea of 'anchoring' it down was putting railroad ties laying d...	Tenderheartsks	7	984	May 3, 2008 by ESH
	repeating patterns (Preview) Ever feel like you are running in circles or yup, hitting your head against the wall? Yeah, me too. Awareness, acceptance, action again & again. Things change but not anything that makes a different result. Maybe I can figure this out with writing now or MIP help so...... ah is courteous, kin...	ddub	2	349	May 3, 2008 by ESH
	Irritated (Preview) Hello friends, I am just trying to hold on and let my AH do what he does and not react. But boy is he pushing my buttons this am. He was supposed to get up at six (my son had to wake him) and take our son to his SATs. I t o l d him the time frame he had planned was cutting it close, but does he listen? Well it is out...	DeadOrAlive	1	317	May 3, 2008 by debilyn
	Thank you for your prayers (Preview) Weeks ago someone posted about a friend who died of alcoholism and asked if anyone wanted prayers for someone we hold dear who is in the same boat. I asked prayers for my brother and have received some feedback from our members assuring me they are praying for him. I have found this such a comfort during t...	Jill	2	478	May 2, 2008 by Jerry F
	Why did I settle for so little for so long? (Preview) It's hard to reflect back over my life and comprehend just how little I settled for throughout my adult life. I was born to two very loving, caring parents, neither alcoholics, but along with their union in marriage came the baggage of generations of alcoholics on both sides. I was a very shy kid growin...	Tenderheartsks	4	748	May 2, 2008 by nmike
	Emtion overload (Preview) Its been 2 weeks since I saw my A most of the time I am doing o.k life is a lot more manageable. Feel like I am heading in right direction. But then the emotions take over anger one minute, lonely the next, scared so scared. How can he have ever loved me why hasn;t he called to apologise for letting me down aga...	Tracy	3	469	May 2, 2008 by maresie
	May Business meeting--- Hehe let's party!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingMay 4, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...	Mandy123	2	595	May 2, 2008 by norwood
	Really good meeting! (Preview) I thank God for the two good meetings I went to this week. I learned so much from other peoples shares. I really didn't think I would ever have any idea why I feel so incomplete or "not as good as" the rest of the world. I now have some idea and realized that there is a higher power that (not only CAN...	glad	1	305	May 2, 2008 by Gailey
	help help help (Preview) please someone shoot me end the pain. i am currently at my in-laws house pickin up my daughter. My Ah is here right now and is piss drunk. he is currently screaming, falling over and blaming everything on me. he is in the basement talking to his father. my daughter is down the park with my mother-in-law....	JeannineM	9	637	May 2, 2008 by glad
	Is it AA or the highway? (Preview) I need some ESH on this guys.... how do you deal with an A who's not in denial anymore, but still isn't exactly in recovery? My A fiance is going to therapy and genuinely trying to work out his issues and figure out his disease, etc. Of course he won't go to AA. There's a million excuses, but the bottom line i...	intothewoods	7	1034	May 2, 2008 by Aloha
	Not doing well (Preview) After the emotional weekend I had with my AH, I've just been feeling pretty low and beat down. I'm thinking part of it is hormones - PMS time for me. I imagine PMS must feel something similar to how it feels when an A isn't drinking. I'm restless and irritable and I go through high highs and low lows. I've be...	Aloha	11	487	May 2, 2008 by Tracy
	Busy Busy week....lots of changes (Preview) Hello All, have not posted in a week or so but have kept up on the reading here....always such a big help...seems like when Im about at the end of my rope I can come here and read for a bit and it helps to calm me. LOTS of changes in my household the past week or so....I made up my mind that I will no longer do th...	acjmom	2	346	May 2, 2008 by maresie
	What else can I do? (Preview) Thankyou for the posts from the other nite. I have tried to call my son re: separting from his wife. I left messages on his cell phone. I don't want to call his home-I feel that I would be interfering with his wife and him. I would love to take the kids for the evening...........I am trying to LEt Go and Let G...	meagain	4	530	May 2, 2008 by maresie
	Celebrating an engagement! (Preview) Some of you will remember that I first came here, devastated by the relationship I had with my daughter, well to be honest the relationship I did NOT have with my daughter. Since then I have been learning how to focus on me; to change the things I could in me and accept the things I could not change in her. I...	Suzannah	10	477	May 2, 2008 by ddub
	Back From Vegas (Preview) (((((Family))))) Well I'm back home again. We had a great flight both ways. I must say, I was worried for nothing. I truly had a good time. My daughter enjoyed her birthday , and I didn't have to end up being a third wheel with her and her boyfriend Hubby was on his best behavior, going out of his way to make m...	cookie1971	5	494	May 2, 2008 by ddub
	ftf meetings (Preview) I just went to my first AA meeting despite not being an A. I bawled through most of the meeting. I caused the woman that was heading hte meeting enough that she wanted to talk to me afterwards. She told me about Alateen and Alanon. Once I got up the urge to speak to her (I had kept saying to my friend, Nate, I do...	Lanchas	3	451	May 2, 2008 by Jean4444
	very new to this, have questions (Preview) I've been with my A husband for almost 10 years. We've had 3 children with one on the way. I'm pretty much at my wit's end with him. After reading this board for the last few days I see I am pretty much a textbook A wife/sig. other. His biggest complaint about me is I'm a control freak. (in his words) I've alwa...	Momto4	8	678	May 2, 2008 by ddub
	I'm going (Preview) To an Al-Anon meeting next Monday evening. I posted late last week my story, and thank you to everyone that responded, I did some more reserach on Al Anon, and after thinking about it and talking with my counsellor today who helped me to realize my H is alchohol dependant (he is a functioning alcoholic,...	doublesmommy	11	646	May 1, 2008 by ddub
	Thank you! (Preview) (((((((((((Family)))))))), Thank you all for the wonderful birthday wishes. It was indeed a lovely day. Even though the sun was shining we pretended it was a rainy day. We stayed home, watched movies and ate . I made all of my favorite foods with lots of butter. Julia Child had nothing on me that d...	Karilynn	5	375	May 1, 2008 by maresie
	Update on me... (Preview) Today is my Friday! (assuming you don't count my 2nd job in which case Saturday is my Friday LOL) Next time I come here I will be a divorced woman! For those of you who know my story you're probably saying it's about dang time!!! ;) Monday is the court date to finalize the divorce and give me full custo...	carolinagirl	3	366	May 1, 2008 by maresie
	What if? (Preview) I'm so blessed to have this board. I've been reading so many of the posts lately - and so many apply to my situation. (HP????) As many of you know...my on-again off-again on-again off-again 30 year romance with my A seems to be on again - albeit from a great distance. But he's been talking to me about...	round3	10	564	May 1, 2008 by round3
	abandoned again (Preview) Hello Everyone, I wanted to say thank you for all the replies and suggestions I have received fromall of you. Next, i don't even know where to start I cannot think or function anymore? I think I am on auto cruise control or something. It's like I am in a fog. The only thing I can do is get up (barely) get ...	JeannineM	6	491	May 1, 2008 by glad lee
	The Butterfly Story (Preview) The Butterfly Story Before this great change comes about, The fuzzy little worm withdraws from its caterpillar world, an finds itself a place alone ,and there painfully, and with much struggling, it wraps itself tightly into a cocoon of its own making; It literally seals itself from the world. Days...	angel123	0	2218	May 1, 2008 by angel123
	The Chicken or the Egg (Preview) The alcoholic in my life has been diagnosed with a serious mental illness. They won't discuss it and surprise surprise, are in denial about it. In so much denial that I was not told about it before the marriage, I found out by coming across some legal papers which contained information about the dia...	ThisIsBlythe	6	651	May 1, 2008 by serendipity
	More miracles...gosh darnit!! (Preview) Aloha All!! I guess I'll bubble a bit and then slaunter off to bed. The family is still growing!! Step Son and Step Daughter-in-Law are now three and it is sooooo promising cause he has been clean and sober over half his life now and her also. And the new member?....a girl finally!!...and check out her...	Jerry F	11	615	May 1, 2008 by Jen
	meditation for today from hazelden (Preview) No decision has to bind us forever. Most of us are no longer sure what we want to be doing a year or even a month from now. When we are called upon to make decisions, any decision that commits us to a certain path in the future, we shudder. Will we be allowed to change our minds. What a change this is from earlie...	Tiger2006	2	886	May 1, 2008 by cookie1971
	Made two decisions (Preview) The first decision (posted under Maria's) was to share my recovery program with a friend. Not a good decision. She called me born again and said she didn't understand. I just wanted to let her know that I had found help with my pain. The second decision was thought out by me. If my AHsober calls I need to ha...	nmike	5	448	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	it only takes one little thing... (Preview) Not even an hour after I last posted, any serenity I thought I had come to, got destroyed. I hate that! Makes me feel stupid. I phoned my AH for two purposes. First, I wanted my son to stay at the office for the day since he didn't have school. Second, my youngest had an injury, and given the medical back...	Loupiness	6	576	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	Why are they so hurtful? (Preview) I am working on my recovery (from my eating disorder) and here lately my A has been really big with his words. He has said some of the not so nice things to me. He talked about my weight. Working on getting a job and everytime I have good news he comes in with negative comments. Then is constantly on me on why...	cmarina2001	5	604	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	Has anyone gone through this?-I sooo h=need help! (Preview) I have posted before-but I am so down--my son has called me on Sunday nite and said his wife and her were divorcing. I have me 83 yr. old Mom here-the start of demensia, so I have had such a stressing 4 days...and so many more to come. I love these grandkids so much--have them all the time. My son is saying his...	meagain	3	793	Apr 30, 2008 by maresie
	I'm opening up (Preview) I really surprised myself at my meeting last night. We had a newcomer to our meeting, and I actually smiled at him and told him welcome, and then after the meeting gave him a big hug, told him I was glad he was there and to keep coming back! I NEVER do that! I am a person who is terrified of new people. I'...	Aloha	5	366	Apr 30, 2008 by serendipity
	Interesting... (Preview) ...you know I cannot find a single post in all of MIP where someone says: "gee, you know it was a real mistake for me to leave/divorce my alcoholic spouse, I really regret it". Just found that interesting...if I am wrong, please correct me!! Hugs, J. PS: I am in no way saying that this is the b...	Jean4444	8	542	Apr 30, 2008 by serendipity
	making Amends to my spouse (Preview) Making amends to my spouse seemed an impossible task. I couldn't find the humility or the courage. This article helped me to change my thinking: I love a man, he is a different kind of man than most, He is a special man. Most people do not understand, because he is one of many that are the so called weakling...	angel123	2	635	Apr 30, 2008 by Jen
	Compassion and Courage (Preview) I first just want to say that though I have not posted in a while I do think of everyone often and still read the posts. My A has now been transferred to a maximum security jail because of the violations he incurred that resulted in lock down for the extended period. Now he is double shackeled when allowed o...	Codependent	3	502	Apr 30, 2008 by carolinagirl
	I went over “The Bridge” (Preview) As many of you know, I have shared Letting go of those not in recovery which I call The Bridge. *Letting Go of Those Not In Recovery* We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge, it is cold and dark. We stood the...	Maria123	7	748	Apr 29, 2008 by wp
	Tough day today (Preview) My 19 year old AD told me today that this coming weekend is the weekend she is moving out. I know this is her own journey, and I can't save her from herself. I've turned it over and taken it back a dozen times today. It's not that she's moving in with an alcoholic, but she's moving in with an abusive alcoholic...	Tenderheartsks	3	382	Apr 29, 2008 by maresie
	ty your concerns and prayers (Preview) Thank you all for your prayers and concerns, pertaining to my surgery. I am healing one day at a time. I have so much love in my heart for all of you. I have a good hubby that has helped and took care of me. I sponsor a few people and received so much support for them as well. Alanon is and has bin my life line. So w...	angel123	0	519	Apr 29, 2008 by angel123
	It's true... it is hard to get rid of your alcoholic (Preview) I had read in an Alanon book that it is hard to get rid of an alcoholic. I hadn't heard from my A-bf since early February... I thought I was rid of him for good now. And not necessarily by my choosing. I was "fired" by his father. His father left a weird voice mail for me back in February; then I h...	ESH	3	688	Apr 29, 2008 by maresie
	what's wrong with me? (Preview) Hello All, I am having a horrible time dealing with all this pain! i can't get me mind off all the drama in my life. I have tried to let go and let god. I am trying really hardbut i feel asif i cant make a move or think until my Ah calls to let me know everything is ok. My husband is not living w/ me and our daughter...	JeannineM	7	420	Apr 29, 2008 by Tracy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.