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Married to Mr. Grumpy
(Preview)
Are you married to this man, too? Yesterday was Valentine's Day. I posted a wish to us all -- myself included. I also bought myself a couple of gifts!!! My AH did nothing. Well, of course -- why was I expecting anything different? I am not whining here -- just venting. I know that I cannot control an...
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db55
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3
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608
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Fell of the wagon- with my drinking that is.
(Preview)
I knew this was coming. My mood had been bad and I'd been irritable. Went a couple of weeks ago and had two glasses of wine. Convinced myself that it proved I was in control. So last night I tried again and this time failed miserably. This morning I am experiencing all of the results- shakes, headach...
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Codependent
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7
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679
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For my Alanon Family
(Preview)
(((((Family)))), A friend of mine sent me an email with this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rooyt3ptNco&feature=email Whenever I feel down, I play this song. I'm not sure when you see it if Pipers would do that. I have seen her chase a deer. But I love the sentiment. Lessons from...
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Karilynn
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3
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458
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New to this group not this disease
(Preview)
Hi all! I'm new to this group sadly not to the disease. I did belong to another online group but they have changed providers and don't like it now. For me it's the start of race season and the start of mayhem. My fiance of 6 years and 2 children together is an alcoholic, he knows he's an alcoholic and kno...
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Holly09
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8
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529
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Starting to breath again
(Preview)
I shared a while back that my AH wasn't letting me on this site and wasn't letting me go to f2f al-anon meetings. He is a dry drunk, not in a program and has become very controlling and manipulative. He calls me about every 15 minutes I'm out of his site and it was draining me. I called it emotional abuse and I...
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java
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6
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591
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Another Backslide ....For HIM!!!
(Preview)
Well today I woke up with excitement on my mind, some of our family & friends were planning to go skating with all our kids and us adults, which they did!!!WE had a great time, My ABrother was suppose to be there as well, but it appears that he didn't have the guts to look me in the eye... See my sister cal...
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Jozie
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4
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964
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So lost
(Preview)
I really do not know what to start with first. All i know is that I have no one to talk to and it is really my fault. I need to vent some where safe and to people who might understand. this is going to be long and I apologize if this is not how it works. I just googles online support for alcoholic family members...
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mag
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6
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513
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People pleasing
(Preview)
Hi everyone havent been on here in a while but I have internet access again at home so will be visiting when ever I can get kids of the computer. Quick overview was married to a compulive gambler for 17 years single for a year then started relationship with my AB. I have never experienced anything like t...
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Tracy
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5
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1096
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I just don't know???
(Preview)
I really dont, for some reason today I can't help but think about how Lazy I have been here of late, I don't know what My problem is..I think sometimes it is the winter weather, but then I think it is something deeper then that! I was doing my reading today, and welp... I can't find my "Hope for Today Bo...
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Jozie
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5
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358
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decision
(Preview)
I have got up this morning and worked my program I rang my sponsor and talked about how I want to love me but I feel cruel leaving the a to face the consequences alone. I know the cycle I know what I will get if I keep contact with the A I will be manipulated, I will feel bad about me I will put him first. My A is 34...
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Tracy
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5
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450
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here we go
(Preview)
My ab got in touch before after nearly 3 weeks. I was kind I listened he said he had lost his job and didnt want to tell me. He said he had over slept but I rang the night before and he was missing so more likely he got drunk and never went in. Hwe said he has been on self destruct for 3 weeks and suffering from d...
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Tracy
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4
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474
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Looking back...Sometimes to far....
(Preview)
Welp Last night, I blessed myself with another F2F... I was told by one of my new friends the week before that she would like to hear from me, well lets just say I was a touch nervous for I am one that does not like to let anyone down... Well Except for myself, that seems to be a regular thing for me,... So as I si...
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Jozie
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3
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479
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Valentines day
(Preview)
I know the "holidays' trigger me so I am trying to keep busy. Nevertheless this morning I had a brain wave. Why not just give myself a lot of love, understanding, care and space. That would be my valentine's day gift for me. I am in the process of cleaning up, organizing and sorting myself out....
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maresie
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8
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455
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Didnt see that coming, Again!
(Preview)
Hi (((All))) Today I was upbeat and determined to feel good on Valentines day. Read your posts, made a gratitude list and took note of daily reading about opening myself up to the love available to me from people, the Universe, and my Higher Power. Ok in the back of my mind if I'm honest I was hoping for...
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Mariner
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5
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673
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What an eyeopener-Share on control
(Preview)
Good morning to my wonderful MIP family. Was reading some in my Language of Letting Go this morning and today's devotion just blew me away, and really hit home, especially with the struggle I have been having to get back on track the past 1 1/2 weeks. It reads as follows and I thought some here...
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shellyj123
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2
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424
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The gift of serenity~ Happy Valentine's Day MIP family:)
(Preview)
Woke up this morning dreading the facing of this day in particular-Valentine's Day. YUCKKK!!! It was this day last year that I came to a place in my life that I believed I was capable of finally letting someone into my and my son's life, capable of giving by boyfriend at the time a fair chance. ...
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shellyj123
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2
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418
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My Ahusband sober - neglects, declines, refuses, forgets, other passive behavior
(Preview)
You know that part of the Do's and Don'ts that encourages us to keep a healthy emotional atmosphere in our home? Well, I struggle to keep myself at least pleasant and cordial at all times. I am not a nag. Life is mostly pleasant around here. My AH has more than 20 years sober. I suspect he is clinically...
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Goodgran
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9
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654
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Getting back to my "Normal"
(Preview)
I am getting back to the normal I am learning to be. For me it is not normal for others but it is normal for me. I am also starting to have less trouble with sleep. For that I am so grateful. I am basically turning over some things that before I would really dwell on. I am starting to "get" it! I a...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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415
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help!
(Preview)
hi my name is brad my wife is 3 weeks out of rehab and she went to the bar and drank last nite after church. i am looking for a meeting in my area but havent had any luck yet. im in iniana east of indianapolis anyone know a good one?
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bgcolter
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3
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2251
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surgery update
(Preview)
(((((My dear friends)))))), For those of you who took the time to let me know how much you care, I very much appreciate you. Surgery was Friday and for all intents and purposes, it went well. I had to stay in the hospital a little longer than anticipated but I am on the road to recovery now. It's very slow an...
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Maria123
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14
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629
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AHsober teaching me :)
(Preview)
I just wanted to share with those of you that went through our drama with us (and those that didn't too) that hubby is 3 yrs sober today. He continues to amaze me. He has his own personal program (does not attend AA, never did). I have never seen any dry drunk behavior nor has he faltered and had a slip. H...
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Christy
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10
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1115
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Valentine's Day
(Preview)
Happy Valentine's Day to All Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are YOU! Be my Valentine! Lovingly, db55
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db55
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2
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261
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Happy Valentines Day to me...
(Preview)
I've really been struggling with getting into an exercise routine. Working full-time and having the kids mostly with me, have made it difficult to carve out that time on a regualr basis. The gym is out due to the expense, time and social factor. So, I got to thinking... I did a google search on using t...
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Loupiness
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2
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396
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Talking About the A
(Preview)
Spinning this from the "obstacles" thread... I think it's pretty rare in Alanon to find a person who never talks about their A. Certainly when new in the program, you want to vent and try to communicate your situation, but after a while you begin to realize that we've all been through it in o...
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barisax
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8
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594
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Loving someone that we don't really like~
(Preview)
I read somewhere awhile back that there is a fine line between love and hate. I never understood it then, but can now. When you first meet someone and begin dating, if it is the right person it leads to liking them and then to love.....a natural course of things. I still love my ex very much, but at...
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shellyj123
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5
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463
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Lonely~ volunteer or other ideas wanted
(Preview)
I've noticed since being in the program that the woman who had no time to do ANYTHING, now finds herself lacking something to do and even bored and lonely at times. I stay active with my reading, and my postings and my meetings. I have emailed MIP and volunteered also-but haven't heard back from...
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shellyj123
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5
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537
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Ease my troubles....that's what you do.
(Preview)
It's Valentines day..... To all of my MIP family....... 'The morning sun in all it's glory is filled with hope and comfort too, you fill my heart with gladness, take away my sadness, ease my troubles, that's what you do. Courtesy of 'van the man' morrison. Love to you all Ness
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Ness
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2
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835
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chat room
(Preview)
Hello, When I tried to enter the chat room Service Unavailable appeared on my computer. I got on to here no problem. This has never happened before. I would really appreciate some feedback on this. Regards, daylight
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daylight48
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5
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392
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4 weeks, 12 steps, the rest of my life
(Preview)
I have been with my AH for 8 years and in that time gone through cycles of hope and disappointment over and over again and each time given more of myself to 'support him'. Predictably (to everyone but me) things are back where they were again with him drinking and me depressed but this time my daughter is o...
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Ickle Lynnie
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16
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484
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A bit of gratitude to my MIP family~
(Preview)
I came here yesterday and posted. I was feeling very down about myself and my recovery, feeling very alone in it all. Feeling like I was a huge disappointment to myself and others here and that I was talking the talk but not walking the walk. I have been going through a bit of depression since EABF...
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shellyj123
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3
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340
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I have to find my faith and my focus~
(Preview)
I realized today after some meditation/prayer time, that I haven't been making my program or my HP my number one priority, and I haven't been trusting my HP or having faith in Him, it's almost like I took a step then forgot it. I've been letting myself get so caught up in my EXABF and the &q...
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shellyj123
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7
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434
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Back on track
(Preview)
A couple of days ago I was feeling low and depressed and majorly unfocused. I got to spend some ample time on the chat line and go to some meetings so now I am feeling better. This program works if you work it! Tonight I have a f2f al-anon meeting I plan to go to, so that should help too. Thanks so much for being...
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java
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3
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443
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No skills for this
(Preview)
Hi Alanoners, Haven't posted or responded much lately. I have alot going on at work as always. I do go to my f2f meetings about every two weeks. I go to AA almost every week (I offer to hold a separate meeting for Alanon). I read my literature daily and talk to my sponsor once a week. I feel like I make progres...
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nmike
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7
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489
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I don't know where to turn. Please help me.
(Preview)
Hi I just want to give an overview of my situation. My husband is an alcoholic (who of course, doesn't have a drinking problem) and is also a victim of cancer. Last February, he had a kidney removed because of cancer. We are just now finding out one year later that the cancer may be back again. He drinks all...
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wonderingwhy
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13
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620
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Online Sponser
(Preview)
I am searching fore an online sponser as my f2f meetings I have been unable to connect with anyone. Would someone be willing to help me journey throughthe steps and find myself? I'm looking for someone that has experience with alcoholic spouse and/or child of an alcoholic parent. Thanks!!
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brightmommy
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2
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416
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"Missing Out" has LEFT THE BUILDING!!!
(Preview)
To everyone in my MIP Family I just want you all to know that I went back to being a "NEWBIE" because I was known as "Missing Out" and Thanks to all you wonderful people, I am "Missing Out" NO MORE!!! I am now Jozie... I want to thank Ms. Suz for helping me talk myself into it...
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Jozie
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7
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529
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looking at fear
(Preview)
The 'search' feature has so many wonderful posts about fear and I realize this is another common thread of our lives. The fear that is the most difficult for me right now is the fear of what might happen based on my imagination or based on past experiences that could also contain fear of 'what if'. It ma...
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ddub
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3
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467
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update on b/f and drinking ..can't take it losing my mind! long sorry
(Preview)
last post was when my b/f went to detox afetr drinking for 15 days. ok in detox out of detox drank one hour later>???? then we are going to detox ourselves again. drink something different or not as much and maybe stop for a day or two when i say i can no longer do this. we talk he begs me AGAIN has been goin...
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maryam
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5
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538
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Remember Heartbroken, well she reappears from time to time tho not for long...so help me through this one family, please
(Preview)
Just sometimes, not often, Heartbroken puts in an appearance and I feel myself feeling a bit panicky. Tonight is one of those nights. Perhaps it is due to the fact that I have been ill during the winter months now for so long, infact I have not been feeling too great since August of last year. Perhaps it...
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Suzannah
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6
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625
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New - I Need To Talk About It
(Preview)
I'm new to this site, having just done a google search for an online Al Anon support group. I find myself here because I could really use some support for what I've been dealing with and have no one IRL that I can talk to about it. My husband is an alcoholic/addict. His general pattern is to use, go to AA,...
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HalfAngel
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4
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516
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Husband enables Asister, what do i do?
(Preview)
I'm between a rock and hard place. My husband admits his sister is an alcoholic but continues to let her seep into our lives. She has been abusing drugs, drinks or anything for that matter for over 20 years. I'm done but he makes excuses like "we don't know for sure she is drinking, she didn't sound...
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juicemommie
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3
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484
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Feeling Low...........
(Preview)
I am feeling low tonight, I can't seem to get control of my emotions. I slipped the other day, trying to talk with my AS about his drug use, it got personal as I tried to reason with him and told him that his drug use was hurting me and the rest of the family as much as it was hurting him. The response I got was t...
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DreamsOver
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4
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451
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Making Amends and loving this program~
(Preview)
Through all of the struggles I have been facing in the past 3 months, I have found a WONDERFUL sponsor, continued to work the program, had many slips and walked many steps.... Just finished up my 9th step.......and WHEWWWW.........what a sense of release and forgiveness can be found in these s...
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shellyj123
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2
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393
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"Missing Out" has LEFT THE BUILDING!!!
(Preview)
To everyone in my MIP Family I just want you all to know that I went back to being a "NEWBIE" because I was known as "Missing Out" and Thanks to all you wonderful people, I am "Missing Out" NO MORE!!! I am now Jozie... I want to thank Ms. Suz for helping me talk myself into it...
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Jozie
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2
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408
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Need help again :)
(Preview)
I just wanted to know how to add a pic to my name... I see some cool pics and I have don't have one :( Can anyone help me with this...Thanks a bunch... Jozie...
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Jozie
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2
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341
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1st f2f...
(Preview)
I made it to my 1st f2f last night....and look forward to next Monday. Thank you for your support and encouragement. Love and gratitude...Ness
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Ness
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8
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590
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Trust
(Preview)
I am having serious issues with trust... I'm totally madly in love with this guy and I know he feels the same way about me but....I don't know why I can't just trust, why that evil little tinge of jealousy keeps popping up. It's so good and I don't want to ruin it. So he's out of town right now visiting famil...
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carolinagirl
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7
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644
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ANGER
(Preview)
Man this woman just flies off the handle at me and anyone else within earshot, I've only just started attending Al-anon and have my second meeting in 2 days - can't wait for it - just to feel the sincerity of those around me who know how I feel and listen to my words. The peace that gives me is so welcome. But 1...
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saltire
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6
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672
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Did I mess up?
(Preview)
Went to my therapist yesterday who reminds me a little of Laura Schlessinger- sarcastic but straight shooting. Anyway, she mocked me a little but also told me straight that the A was a narcissitic addict that did not love his son and that if I told my child that he did love him I was lying. My child is 4 an...
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Codependent
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11
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693
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time for some gratitiude
(Preview)
I've spent a lot of time crying and in fear the past couple of weeks. I've been sick and really have gotten away from my program. Then, on Sunday night I went to bed at 8:30, and I got a pretty good sleep last night too. Suddenly, I feel a need to express some gratitude. Amazing how that works... My son ma...
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Loupiness
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5
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579
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Right where I need to be~all screwed up
(Preview)
Those of you who have been following my story know that I have been on a roller coaster ride of emotions lately. It got even crazier the past week when EXABF wrote me an email and mentioned "finding me, no matter what"when he got to the point where he was capable of giving us a fai...
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shellyj123
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1
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302
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Less destructive, but still.....
(Preview)
These days I feel shakey in my recovery.I am easily triggered....in the affairs of the heart mostly.Tho I am not exploding as I did last week, I do something else that feels old and familiar and unhealthy to me.I explain feelings till I am blue in the face....I'm not always sure I am even being understoo...
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Fifi
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3
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628
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Have a Question???
(Preview)
I have been wanting to change my name from "Missing Out" to something a little more to were I am NOW in my life, which is by far NOT Missing Out... A dear MIP friend of mine told me that I could, but the only way she found to do it was to start a new one, which means i loose all my posts and what not! So my...
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missing out
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3
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484
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Is this Dry Drunk Recovering Alcoholic Behavior, Mid-life Crisis or both???
(Preview)
Hello There: It has been a long time since I posted here, but I do visit the message board because it is so insightful and other peoples stories and the feedback helps me to process my own situation. A bit of history here... my husband has been sober since end of June 2006. We have been married coming up on 1...
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JS
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19
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10519
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trying to practice acceptance for my non A husband
(Preview)
my marriage is falling apart. I feel safe to vent here. My husband is not an A but is in complete denial that he is having major emotional problems. He tries to put it on me but I will no longer accept that I may be his problem. He is 59 years old and on many medications for high blood pressure,high cholestero...
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Gailey
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6
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494
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Fighting my feeling to Take Over....
(Preview)
Well, Tonight my son had a indoor soccer game, we won.... YEAH!!!! How ever the shock was that my Abrother, and his children came with my mom to watch my son play... I know this doesn't sound like much, but to me it is something... He had his children, and he managed to spend more family time with us all......
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missing out
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5
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430
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Some good new
(Preview)
I GOT A CONDITIONAL OFFER TO SALFORD UNIVERSITY Oh my god who would have thought ME going to UNIVERSITY. Ha my week has just got soooooooooo good. Im so bloody happy.
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mum2leahnjosh
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4
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521
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Need to vent
(Preview)
My non-drinking alcoholic husband has been driving me crazy lately watching my every move and not wanting me on al-anon sites or going to my f2f meetings. I've been giving in to it mostly with the f2f, it's too hard to fight him and listen to the rants and raves. It's bad enough when I go on-line at home whe...
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java
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7
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465
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How do you know...?
(Preview)
Left my ABF a few weeks ago......I guess me leaving made him wake up a bit. He's been going to meetings every day and has a new sponsor. He's doing so well...he's almost a different person. He's been begging me to give him one more chance and to wait for him to get better. He wants me to still be his girl...
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reef999
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6
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531
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Decision making time..
(Preview)
AH and have been seperated for 7 months, filed and put divorce on hold several times since. He's not ready for recovery right now and we can not live together. I've been struggling with the decision and guilt of leaving him. I'm so often consumed with thoughts of what was, wasn't and what may never...
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Marshmallow
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4
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645
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