Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I am soooo at my wits end right now and not sure how to get it together at this point. I am tired,completely and utterly physically exhausted at this point, my house is a nightmare, work is at it's busiest and I can barely concentrate. My son has been really sick since Monday, and I found out yest...

Tree · Tree

I'm having a hard time with not trying to "control" him. Some things I read say I need to just chill out, have fun- work on making me happy... but then I read about "enabling" and find that if I think it's unexceptable that he's not going to AA meetings and having "a drink onc...

Saved By Grace · Saved By Grace

I am not new to the rooms of recovery but feel like I am due to the present circumstances. I had been involved a man for about two years. I thought he was probably the sweetest, most attentive and loving man I had ever met. I didn't see any signs of alcoholism or any other addictions, so I did not exactly proc...

Gessie · Gessie

Hello. I am brand-new to this...I never even heard of Al-Anon until recently. I'm not sure how this all works, but I am in need of some support I suppose. I am married to an alcoholic. We have been married for two years and have a 11 month old daughter. We recently relocated to another state, far away...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I added a chair rail and painted all woodwork white. I used a sage green under the chair rail. With a color two shades lighter mixed with glaze and a wash technique above the chair rail. Floors were stripped, rewaxed and buffed. All windows were cleaned inside and out. All wall decorations changed plac...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear All, As some of you know, I took the bereaved step mothers dog, it has worked out good, took a bit of effort, but I love her to bits. I have less contact with my father now, he does not ring me, I ring to see if all is ok, and am cordial, though I do not like him as a person but he is my father and eighty and livin...

NiceGal · NiceGal

Hi everyone! This is probably my first time, posting, venting, etc about this. 16 years ago, when I was 16 years old...I had to come to grips that my sister, who I love and worshiped, was a drug addict/alcoholic. I think back then I was in denial, or maybe just didnt fully understand it. Thankfully she...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I'm finding it really hard not to get sucked back in to making all my time about the new boyfriend. I can't get enough. I want to be with him every free moment and have stopped doing things I need to do. I know this. I just can't seem to stop myself. Why quit something so wonderful??? UGH. It's like I h...

Ickle Lynnie · Ickle Lynnie

Sorry to post this here but I have tried emailing the support email and it bounces. I really want to access the chat room/online meetings but my computer won't allow me to install the required active x controls because it is an untrusted publisher. Has anyone else had this problem and know how to fix it...

kellys_angels · kellys_angels

My name is Kelly and I have two little angels and I'm affaid that Daddy may repeat my past childhood. My AH and I have been separated for almost six months now. I had to go to the State because he wouldn't give my any child support. I have only recieved two checks so far these past 3 weeks. We went to have o...

Ickle Lynnie · Ickle Lynnie

Hi, After 4 weeks soul searching I have asked AH to move out. Predictably his response has been to hit the bottle, be unkind and engage in self-pitying behaviour while trying to persuade me into bed. I do want to continue our marriage but need some distance in order to cope with his drinking. We haven't...

Canary · Canary

So, to give you an update and summary. December 30th I asked my AH to leave the house after relapse after relapse. (He was sober for 8 years...relapsed over and over, went to rehab and then continued to relapse). He has been out of the house since then and continues to be out. He has been sober so far, or at...

Tracy · Tracy

I know in my head I have to let go move on with my life. I have made the decision in my logical brain that I have to love me and end this relationship let my ex ab face the consequences of his decisions and respect him enough to let him fix himself. I intended to tell him all this but he is low really low lost evr...

maresie · maresie

I met a woman recently who I hope to make a friend as we have a lot of similar issues. There is so much difference in becoming a friend in recovery from codpendence rather than in total denial and hell bent on getting my needs met. First of all I don't submerge her in love bombing, secondly I don't talk to he...

smllfry115 · smllfry115

I'm feeling raw, like I want to cry all of the time. A piece of me wants to just go to sleep and not talk to anyone, while another piece of me is angry and wants to scream at anyone who will listen. I feel sad, and angry, and disgusted all at once. And most of all I feel alone, because my friends and boyfriend don...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I wanted to ask you that have been in therapy or going through therapy now, has it helped you? Can going through this process give you any relief? I can feel myself going backward, I may pull out of it by myself, but if therapy helps I am open to it. I understand that no two people are alike and what may work f...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I have prayed to my HP to let me see with open eyes what it is He wants me to see, and again He does not falter. I usually try not to let my EXABF into my thoughts to often, but after hearing the other day that he was seen out with a young girl, I won't lie, it stung and I finally allowed myself some time, almost a w...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp today I got up to a sick kid, and things were worrisome none the less, he is sick in bed with a fever, which I am praying works its way thru rather quickly...As I pray...This too will pass.... In reading my devotional books this morning I came across one that mentioned our slogans, and what they mean,...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

Hi All! It's been a while since I've been here (no major problems the last few months). Unfortunately my husband was arrested last night and our son was in the car. That makes it an automatic felony here in AZ. I happened to be out of the house - it was my night off and I was supposed to be spending a relaxi...

brightmommy · brightmommy

In working Step One, I have come to realize that want to find peace and serenity for my life. I need to change my behaviors and learn how to take care of myself. I realize my life has always been unmanageable due to growing up in an alcohoholic home and currently married to an alcoholic who is in recovery....

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Woke up this morning contemplating the meaning of my program and my life. Decided that no matter what, I could not face another week like the past two, where my program was off track and I was struggling with obsessing and what if's and focusing on the A instead of myself. I felt like an insane woman aga...

Maria123 · Maria123

((((Friends)))), Thanks so much for the well wishes! The last few days have been really tough -- a lot of pain. Keep the prayers coming, I sure do appreciate them. love Maria I got the below from an email this morning and thought we all could use a little more love every day . . . When Children Ages 4-8 wer...

Ness · Ness

Today I am shakey and tearful....the situation with my A son's health (physical and mental) is deteriorating, I have been speaking with his care workers' and we're all telling him the same thing.....the help is all there for him, but his fears are stopping him taking that 1st step. I am overwhelm...

juicemommie · juicemommie

Ok, so Today my son ask if he can go spend the night with his aunt (the sober one) but I said only if the other aunt (not sober one) was not going to be there. So my 14 yr old proceeds to start explaining "yeah My mom has a problem with her and I don't understand why". Which leads into me making him han...

Jozie · Jozie

Well after yet again, Lettimg my Abrother, put a wrench in my wonderful day that I had yesterday, I have spoked to my husband and if we have to move it.. "the trailor" we have to move it, either way, when my commitment to my Afather-R.I.P. is up in June, then that is the day that I will worry abo...

maire rua · maire rua

Brother went on bender sunday night, high as a kite, fell broke his wrist, looks in bad shape from second hand accounts, lost the phone I got him, I owe him 30 euro so am thinking that I should get him replacement which he wants and tell him that I used money owed, fair enough isn't it, Teenage son giving me g...

angelpm39 · angelpm39

My name is Portia. I am from Southern California. I learn of this message board through searching on the web. I hope to learnand meet others as well. I currently am doing meetings online. today it is a little difficult and I hope as times goes by things will improve in my life. I do have an ABF who is still i...

db55 · db55

Are you married to this man, too? Yesterday was Valentine's Day. I posted a wish to us all -- myself included. I also bought myself a couple of gifts!!! My AH did nothing. Well, of course -- why was I expecting anything different? I am not whining here -- just venting. I know that I cannot control an...

Codependent · Codependent

I knew this was coming. My mood had been bad and I'd been irritable. Went a couple of weeks ago and had two glasses of wine. Convinced myself that it proved I was in control. So last night I tried again and this time failed miserably. This morning I am experiencing all of the results- shakes, headach...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family)))), A friend of mine sent me an email with this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rooyt3ptNco&feature=email Whenever I feel down, I play this song. I'm not sure when you see it if Pipers would do that. I have seen her chase a deer. But I love the sentiment. Lessons from...

Holly09 · Holly09

Hi all! I'm new to this group sadly not to the disease. I did belong to another online group but they have changed providers and don't like it now. For me it's the start of race season and the start of mayhem. My fiance of 6 years and 2 children together is an alcoholic, he knows he's an alcoholic and kno...

java · java

I shared a while back that my AH wasn't letting me on this site and wasn't letting me go to f2f al-anon meetings. He is a dry drunk, not in a program and has become very controlling and manipulative. He calls me about every 15 minutes I'm out of his site and it was draining me. I called it emotional abuse and I...

Jozie · Jozie

Well today I woke up with excitement on my mind, some of our family & friends were planning to go skating with all our kids and us adults, which they did!!!WE had a great time, My ABrother was suppose to be there as well, but it appears that he didn't have the guts to look me in the eye... See my sister cal...

mag · mag

I really do not know what to start with first. All i know is that I have no one to talk to and it is really my fault. I need to vent some where safe and to people who might understand. this is going to be long and I apologize if this is not how it works. I just googles online support for alcoholic family members...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi everyone havent been on here in a while but I have internet access again at home so will be visiting when ever I can get kids of the computer. Quick overview was married to a compulive gambler for 17 years single for a year then started relationship with my AB. I have never experienced anything like t...

Jozie · Jozie

I really dont, for some reason today I can't help but think about how Lazy I have been here of late, I don't know what My problem is..I think sometimes it is the winter weather, but then I think it is something deeper then that! I was doing my reading today, and welp... I can't find my "Hope for Today Bo...

Tracy · Tracy

I have got up this morning and worked my program I rang my sponsor and talked about how I want to love me but I feel cruel leaving the a to face the consequences alone. I know the cycle I know what I will get if I keep contact with the A I will be manipulated, I will feel bad about me I will put him first. My A is 34...

Tracy · Tracy

My ab got in touch before after nearly 3 weeks. I was kind I listened he said he had lost his job and didnt want to tell me. He said he had over slept but I rang the night before and he was missing so more likely he got drunk and never went in. Hwe said he has been on self destruct for 3 weeks and suffering from d...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp Last night, I blessed myself with another F2F... I was told by one of my new friends the week before that she would like to hear from me, well lets just say I was a touch nervous for I am one that does not like to let anyone down... Well Except for myself, that seems to be a regular thing for me,... So as I si...

maresie · maresie

I know the "holidays' trigger me so I am trying to keep busy. Nevertheless this morning I had a brain wave. Why not just give myself a lot of love, understanding, care and space. That would be my valentine's day gift for me. I am in the process of cleaning up, organizing and sorting myself out....

Mariner · Mariner

Hi (((All))) Today I was upbeat and determined to feel good on Valentines day. Read your posts, made a gratitude list and took note of daily reading about opening myself up to the love available to me from people, the Universe, and my Higher Power. Ok in the back of my mind if I'm honest I was hoping for...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Good morning to my wonderful MIP family. Was reading some in my Language of Letting Go this morning and today's devotion just blew me away, and really hit home, especially with the struggle I have been having to get back on track the past 1 1/2 weeks. It reads as follows and I thought some here...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Woke up this morning dreading the facing of this day in particular-Valentine's Day. YUCKKK!!! It was this day last year that I came to a place in my life that I believed I was capable of finally letting someone into my and my son's life, capable of giving by boyfriend at the time a fair chance. ...

Goodgran · Goodgran

You know that part of the Do's and Don'ts that encourages us to keep a healthy emotional atmosphere in our home? Well, I struggle to keep myself at least pleasant and cordial at all times. I am not a nag. Life is mostly pleasant around here. My AH has more than 20 years sober. I suspect he is clinically...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am getting back to the normal I am learning to be. For me it is not normal for others but it is normal for me. I am also starting to have less trouble with sleep. For that I am so grateful. I am basically turning over some things that before I would really dwell on. I am starting to "get" it! I a...

bgcolter · bgcolter

hi my name is brad my wife is 3 weeks out of rehab and she went to the bar and drank last nite after church. i am looking for a meeting in my area but havent had any luck yet. im in iniana east of indianapolis anyone know a good one?

Maria123 · Maria123

(((((My dear friends)))))), For those of you who took the time to let me know how much you care, I very much appreciate you. Surgery was Friday and for all intents and purposes, it went well. I had to stay in the hospital a little longer than anticipated but I am on the road to recovery now. It's very slow an...

Christy · Christy

I just wanted to share with those of you that went through our drama with us (and those that didn't too) that hubby is 3 yrs sober today. He continues to amaze me. He has his own personal program (does not attend AA, never did). I have never seen any dry drunk behavior nor has he faltered and had a slip. H...

db55 · db55

Happy Valentine's Day to All Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are YOU! Be my Valentine! Lovingly, db55

Loupiness · Loupiness

I've really been struggling with getting into an exercise routine. Working full-time and having the kids mostly with me, have made it difficult to carve out that time on a regualr basis. The gym is out due to the expense, time and social factor. So, I got to thinking... I did a google search on using t...

barisax · barisax

Spinning this from the "obstacles" thread... I think it's pretty rare in Alanon to find a person who never talks about their A. Certainly when new in the program, you want to vent and try to communicate your situation, but after a while you begin to realize that we've all been through it in o...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I read somewhere awhile back that there is a fine line between love and hate. I never understood it then, but can now. When you first meet someone and begin dating, if it is the right person it leads to liking them and then to love.....a natural course of things. I still love my ex very much, but at...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I've noticed since being in the program that the woman who had no time to do ANYTHING, now finds herself lacking something to do and even bored and lonely at times. I stay active with my reading, and my postings and my meetings. I have emailed MIP and volunteered also-but haven't heard back from...

Ness · Ness

It's Valentines day..... To all of my MIP family....... 'The morning sun in all it's glory is filled with hope and comfort too, you fill my heart with gladness, take away my sadness, ease my troubles, that's what you do. Courtesy of 'van the man' morrison. Love to you all Ness

daylight48 · daylight48

Hello, When I tried to enter the chat room Service Unavailable appeared on my computer. I got on to here no problem. This has never happened before. I would really appreciate some feedback on this. Regards, daylight

Ickle Lynnie · Ickle Lynnie

I have been with my AH for 8 years and in that time gone through cycles of hope and disappointment over and over again and each time given more of myself to 'support him'. Predictably (to everyone but me) things are back where they were again with him drinking and me depressed but this time my daughter is o...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I came here yesterday and posted. I was feeling very down about myself and my recovery, feeling very alone in it all. Feeling like I was a huge disappointment to myself and others here and that I was talking the talk but not walking the walk. I have been going through a bit of depression since EABF...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I realized today after some meditation/prayer time, that I haven't been making my program or my HP my number one priority, and I haven't been trusting my HP or having faith in Him, it's almost like I took a step then forgot it. I've been letting myself get so caught up in my EXABF and the &q...

java · java

A couple of days ago I was feeling low and depressed and majorly unfocused. I got to spend some ample time on the chat line and go to some meetings so now I am feeling better. This program works if you work it! Tonight I have a f2f al-anon meeting I plan to go to, so that should help too. Thanks so much for being...

nmike · nmike

Hi Alanoners, Haven't posted or responded much lately. I have alot going on at work as always. I do go to my f2f meetings about every two weeks. I go to AA almost every week (I offer to hold a separate meeting for Alanon). I read my literature daily and talk to my sponsor once a week. I feel like I make progres...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	On the verge of emotional meltdown.........ESH desperately needed (Preview) I am soooo at my wits end right now and not sure how to get it together at this point. I am tired,completely and utterly physically exhausted at this point, my house is a nightmare, work is at it's busiest and I can barely concentrate. My son has been really sick since Monday, and I found out yest...	shellyj123	9	1075	Feb 19, 2009 by shellyj123
	How far to go with preventing enabling (Preview) I'm having a hard time with not trying to "control" him. Some things I read say I need to just chill out, have fun- work on making me happy... but then I read about "enabling" and find that if I think it's unexceptable that he's not going to AA meetings and having "a drink onc...	Tree	10	626	Feb 19, 2009 by merry
	Trusting My Higher Power (Preview) I am not new to the rooms of recovery but feel like I am due to the present circumstances. I had been involved a man for about two years. I thought he was probably the sweetest, most attentive and loving man I had ever met. I didn't see any signs of alcoholism or any other addictions, so I did not exactly proc...	Saved By Grace	6	678	Feb 19, 2009 by Saved By Grace
	New and looking for peace (Preview) Hello. I am brand-new to this...I never even heard of Al-Anon until recently. I'm not sure how this all works, but I am in need of some support I suppose. I am married to an alcoholic. We have been married for two years and have a 11 month old daughter. We recently relocated to another state, far away...	Gessie	7	622	Feb 19, 2009 by Christy
	f2f meeting room redo (Preview) I added a chair rail and painted all woodwork white. I used a sage green under the chair rail. With a color two shades lighter mixed with glaze and a wash technique above the chair rail. Floors were stripped, rewaxed and buffed. All windows were cleaned inside and out. All wall decorations changed plac...	Mobirdie	5	730	Feb 19, 2009 by Loupiness
	update on all (Preview) Dear All, As some of you know, I took the bereaved step mothers dog, it has worked out good, took a bit of effort, but I love her to bits. I have less contact with my father now, he does not ring me, I ring to see if all is ok, and am cordial, though I do not like him as a person but he is my father and eighty and livin...	maire rua	1	551	Feb 18, 2009 by Jozie
	New Here, Dont know where to start...but here it goes! (Preview) Hi everyone! This is probably my first time, posting, venting, etc about this. 16 years ago, when I was 16 years old...I had to come to grips that my sister, who I love and worshiped, was a drug addict/alcoholic. I think back then I was in denial, or maybe just didnt fully understand it. Thankfully she...	NiceGal	6	547	Feb 18, 2009 by Maria123
	Obsessing (Preview) I'm finding it really hard not to get sucked back in to making all my time about the new boyfriend. I can't get enough. I want to be with him every free moment and have stopped doing things I need to do. I know this. I just can't seem to stop myself. Why quit something so wonderful??? UGH. It's like I h...	carolinagirl	6	666	Feb 18, 2009 by maire rua
	Technical Question - chat room access (Preview) Sorry to post this here but I have tried emailing the support email and it bounces. I really want to access the chat room/online meetings but my computer won't allow me to install the required active x controls because it is an untrusted publisher. Has anyone else had this problem and know how to fix it...	Ickle Lynnie	1	326	Feb 18, 2009 by Maria123
	I'm scared (Preview) My name is Kelly and I have two little angels and I'm affaid that Daddy may repeat my past childhood. My AH and I have been separated for almost six months now. I had to go to the State because he wouldn't give my any child support. I have only recieved two checks so far these past 3 weeks. We went to have o...	kellys_angels	7	604	Feb 18, 2009 by kellys_angels
	Lonely and Missing Him - Adult Theme (Preview) Hi, After 4 weeks soul searching I have asked AH to move out. Predictably his response has been to hit the bottle, be unkind and engage in self-pitying behaviour while trying to persuade me into bed. I do want to continue our marriage but need some distance in order to cope with his drinking. We haven't...	Ickle Lynnie	7	738	Feb 18, 2009 by kitty
	My recovery has been a rollercoaster...and Man, am I in a big dip. (Preview) So, to give you an update and summary. December 30th I asked my AH to leave the house after relapse after relapse. (He was sober for 8 years...relapsed over and over, went to rehab and then continued to relapse). He has been out of the house since then and continues to be out. He has been sober so far, or at...	Canary	6	525	Feb 18, 2009 by serendipity
	clinging (Preview) I know in my head I have to let go move on with my life. I have made the decision in my logical brain that I have to love me and end this relationship let my ex ab face the consequences of his decisions and respect him enough to let him fix himself. I intended to tell him all this but he is low really low lost evr...	Tracy	4	567	Feb 18, 2009 by java
	doing things differently. (Preview) I met a woman recently who I hope to make a friend as we have a lot of similar issues. There is so much difference in becoming a friend in recovery from codpendence rather than in total denial and hell bent on getting my needs met. First of all I don't submerge her in love bombing, secondly I don't talk to he...	maresie	3	565	Feb 17, 2009 by maresie
	Overwhelmed. (Preview) I'm feeling raw, like I want to cry all of the time. A piece of me wants to just go to sleep and not talk to anyone, while another piece of me is angry and wants to scream at anyone who will listen. I feel sad, and angry, and disgusted all at once. And most of all I feel alone, because my friends and boyfriend don...	smllfry115	7	581	Feb 17, 2009 by Jean4444
	Therapy?? (Preview) I wanted to ask you that have been in therapy or going through therapy now, has it helped you? Can going through this process give you any relief? I can feel myself going backward, I may pull out of it by myself, but if therapy helps I am open to it. I understand that no two people are alike and what may work f...	DreamsOver	4	429	Feb 17, 2009 by db55
	In need of some ESH to get through a gray day~ (Preview) I have prayed to my HP to let me see with open eyes what it is He wants me to see, and again He does not falter. I usually try not to let my EXABF into my thoughts to often, but after hearing the other day that he was seen out with a young girl, I won't lie, it stung and I finally allowed myself some time, almost a w...	shellyj123	1	388	Feb 17, 2009 by kitty
	In Reading... (Preview) Welp today I got up to a sick kid, and things were worrisome none the less, he is sick in bed with a fever, which I am praying works its way thru rather quickly...As I pray...This too will pass.... In reading my devotional books this morning I came across one that mentioned our slogans, and what they mean,...	Jozie	1	454	Feb 17, 2009 by shellyj123
	Husband arrested for DUI last night (Preview) Hi All! It's been a while since I've been here (no major problems the last few months). Unfortunately my husband was arrested last night and our son was in the car. That makes it an automatic felony here in AZ. I happened to be out of the house - it was my night off and I was supposed to be spending a relaxi...	N8SMOM	11	5211	Feb 17, 2009 by N8SMOM
	Step One... step one (Preview) In working Step One, I have come to realize that want to find peace and serenity for my life. I need to change my behaviors and learn how to take care of myself. I realize my life has always been unmanageable due to growing up in an alcohoholic home and currently married to an alcoholic who is in recovery....	brightmommy	3	513	Feb 17, 2009 by hotrod
	Another ramble~ (Preview) Woke up this morning contemplating the meaning of my program and my life. Decided that no matter what, I could not face another week like the past two, where my program was off track and I was struggling with obsessing and what if's and focusing on the A instead of myself. I felt like an insane woman aga...	shellyj123	2	371	Feb 17, 2009 by Mariner
	We all need a little more love every day . . . (Preview) ((((Friends)))), Thanks so much for the well wishes! The last few days have been really tough -- a lot of pain. Keep the prayers coming, I sure do appreciate them. love Maria I got the below from an email this morning and thought we all could use a little more love every day . . . When Children Ages 4-8 wer...	Maria123	3	721	Feb 16, 2009 by wp
	need some ESH please. (Preview) Today I am shakey and tearful....the situation with my A son's health (physical and mental) is deteriorating, I have been speaking with his care workers' and we're all telling him the same thing.....the help is all there for him, but his fears are stopping him taking that 1st step. I am overwhelm...	Ness	5	574	Feb 16, 2009 by Ness
	How did I become the "bad guy"? What next? Need Options Help! (Preview) Ok, so Today my son ask if he can go spend the night with his aunt (the sober one) but I said only if the other aunt (not sober one) was not going to be there. So my 14 yr old proceeds to start explaining "yeah My mom has a problem with her and I don't understand why". Which leads into me making him han...	juicemommie	6	796	Feb 16, 2009 by maire rua
	Just another shared Thought! (Preview) Well after yet again, Lettimg my Abrother, put a wrench in my wonderful day that I had yesterday, I have spoked to my husband and if we have to move it.. "the trailor" we have to move it, either way, when my commitment to my Afather-R.I.P. is up in June, then that is the day that I will worry abo...	Jozie	0	517	Feb 16, 2009 by Jozie
	a-brother deteriorating (Preview) Brother went on bender sunday night, high as a kite, fell broke his wrist, looks in bad shape from second hand accounts, lost the phone I got him, I owe him 30 euro so am thinking that I should get him replacement which he wants and tell him that I used money owed, fair enough isn't it, Teenage son giving me g...	maire rua	7	624	Feb 16, 2009 by maresie
	New here (Preview) My name is Portia. I am from Southern California. I learn of this message board through searching on the web. I hope to learnand meet others as well. I currently am doing meetings online. today it is a little difficult and I hope as times goes by things will improve in my life. I do have an ABF who is still i...	angelpm39	8	631	Feb 16, 2009 by angelpm39
	Married to Mr. Grumpy (Preview) Are you married to this man, too? Yesterday was Valentine's Day. I posted a wish to us all -- myself included. I also bought myself a couple of gifts!!! My AH did nothing. Well, of course -- why was I expecting anything different? I am not whining here -- just venting. I know that I cannot control an...	db55	3	666	Feb 16, 2009 by maresie
	Fell of the wagon- with my drinking that is. (Preview) I knew this was coming. My mood had been bad and I'd been irritable. Went a couple of weeks ago and had two glasses of wine. Convinced myself that it proved I was in control. So last night I tried again and this time failed miserably. This morning I am experiencing all of the results- shakes, headach...	Codependent	7	739	Feb 16, 2009 by maresie
	For my Alanon Family (Preview) (((((Family)))), A friend of mine sent me an email with this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rooyt3ptNco&feature=email Whenever I feel down, I play this song. I'm not sure when you see it if Pipers would do that. I have seen her chase a deer. But I love the sentiment. Lessons from...	Karilynn	3	519	Feb 16, 2009 by maresie
	New to this group not this disease (Preview) Hi all! I'm new to this group sadly not to the disease. I did belong to another online group but they have changed providers and don't like it now. For me it's the start of race season and the start of mayhem. My fiance of 6 years and 2 children together is an alcoholic, he knows he's an alcoholic and kno...	Holly09	8	589	Feb 16, 2009 by canadianguy
	Starting to breath again (Preview) I shared a while back that my AH wasn't letting me on this site and wasn't letting me go to f2f al-anon meetings. He is a dry drunk, not in a program and has become very controlling and manipulative. He calls me about every 15 minutes I'm out of his site and it was draining me. I called it emotional abuse and I...	java	6	660	Feb 16, 2009 by Maria123
	Another Backslide ....For HIM!!! (Preview) Well today I woke up with excitement on my mind, some of our family & friends were planning to go skating with all our kids and us adults, which they did!!!WE had a great time, My ABrother was suppose to be there as well, but it appears that he didn't have the guts to look me in the eye... See my sister cal...	Jozie	4	1032	Feb 16, 2009 by Jozie
	So lost (Preview) I really do not know what to start with first. All i know is that I have no one to talk to and it is really my fault. I need to vent some where safe and to people who might understand. this is going to be long and I apologize if this is not how it works. I just googles online support for alcoholic family members...	mag	6	586	Feb 15, 2009 by Jerry F
	People pleasing (Preview) Hi everyone havent been on here in a while but I have internet access again at home so will be visiting when ever I can get kids of the computer. Quick overview was married to a compulive gambler for 17 years single for a year then started relationship with my AB. I have never experienced anything like t...	Tracy	5	1168	Feb 15, 2009 by maresie
	I just don't know??? (Preview) I really dont, for some reason today I can't help but think about how Lazy I have been here of late, I don't know what My problem is..I think sometimes it is the winter weather, but then I think it is something deeper then that! I was doing my reading today, and welp... I can't find my "Hope for Today Bo...	Jozie	5	422	Feb 15, 2009 by maresie
	decision (Preview) I have got up this morning and worked my program I rang my sponsor and talked about how I want to love me but I feel cruel leaving the a to face the consequences alone. I know the cycle I know what I will get if I keep contact with the A I will be manipulated, I will feel bad about me I will put him first. My A is 34...	Tracy	5	509	Feb 15, 2009 by maresie
	here we go (Preview) My ab got in touch before after nearly 3 weeks. I was kind I listened he said he had lost his job and didnt want to tell me. He said he had over slept but I rang the night before and he was missing so more likely he got drunk and never went in. Hwe said he has been on self destruct for 3 weeks and suffering from d...	Tracy	4	539	Feb 15, 2009 by maresie
	Looking back...Sometimes to far.... (Preview) Welp Last night, I blessed myself with another F2F... I was told by one of my new friends the week before that she would like to hear from me, well lets just say I was a touch nervous for I am one that does not like to let anyone down... Well Except for myself, that seems to be a regular thing for me,... So as I si...	Jozie	3	551	Feb 15, 2009 by maresie
	Valentines day (Preview) I know the "holidays' trigger me so I am trying to keep busy. Nevertheless this morning I had a brain wave. Why not just give myself a lot of love, understanding, care and space. That would be my valentine's day gift for me. I am in the process of cleaning up, organizing and sorting myself out....	maresie	8	515	Feb 15, 2009 by maresie
	Didnt see that coming, Again! (Preview) Hi (((All))) Today I was upbeat and determined to feel good on Valentines day. Read your posts, made a gratitude list and took note of daily reading about opening myself up to the love available to me from people, the Universe, and my Higher Power. Ok in the back of my mind if I'm honest I was hoping for...	Mariner	5	734	Feb 15, 2009 by glad lee
	What an eyeopener-Share on control (Preview) Good morning to my wonderful MIP family. Was reading some in my Language of Letting Go this morning and today's devotion just blew me away, and really hit home, especially with the struggle I have been having to get back on track the past 1 1/2 weeks. It reads as follows and I thought some here...	shellyj123	2	483	Feb 15, 2009 by Sis63
	The gift of serenity~ Happy Valentine's Day MIP family:) (Preview) Woke up this morning dreading the facing of this day in particular-Valentine's Day. YUCKKK!!! It was this day last year that I came to a place in my life that I believed I was capable of finally letting someone into my and my son's life, capable of giving by boyfriend at the time a fair chance. ...	shellyj123	2	482	Feb 15, 2009 by brightmommy
	My Ahusband sober - neglects, declines, refuses, forgets, other passive behavior (Preview) You know that part of the Do's and Don'ts that encourages us to keep a healthy emotional atmosphere in our home? Well, I struggle to keep myself at least pleasant and cordial at all times. I am not a nag. Life is mostly pleasant around here. My AH has more than 20 years sober. I suspect he is clinically...	Goodgran	9	720	Feb 14, 2009 by Goodgran
	Getting back to my "Normal" (Preview) I am getting back to the normal I am learning to be. For me it is not normal for others but it is normal for me. I am also starting to have less trouble with sleep. For that I am so grateful. I am basically turning over some things that before I would really dwell on. I am starting to "get" it! I a...	Hoot Nanny	1	475	Feb 14, 2009 by Jozie
	help! (Preview) hi my name is brad my wife is 3 weeks out of rehab and she went to the bar and drank last nite after church. i am looking for a meeting in my area but havent had any luck yet. im in iniana east of indianapolis anyone know a good one?	bgcolter	3	2543	Feb 14, 2009 by abbyal
	surgery update (Preview) (((((My dear friends)))))), For those of you who took the time to let me know how much you care, I very much appreciate you. Surgery was Friday and for all intents and purposes, it went well. I had to stay in the hospital a little longer than anticipated but I am on the road to recovery now. It's very slow an...	Maria123	14	693	Feb 14, 2009 by bob6502
	AHsober teaching me :) (Preview) I just wanted to share with those of you that went through our drama with us (and those that didn't too) that hubby is 3 yrs sober today. He continues to amaze me. He has his own personal program (does not attend AA, never did). I have never seen any dry drunk behavior nor has he faltered and had a slip. H...	Christy	10	1180	Feb 14, 2009 by bob6502
	Valentine's Day (Preview) Happy Valentine's Day to All Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are YOU! Be my Valentine! Lovingly, db55	db55	2	321	Feb 14, 2009 by BrianS
	Happy Valentines Day to me... (Preview) I've really been struggling with getting into an exercise routine. Working full-time and having the kids mostly with me, have made it difficult to carve out that time on a regualr basis. The gym is out due to the expense, time and social factor. So, I got to thinking... I did a google search on using t...	Loupiness	2	457	Feb 14, 2009 by Karilynn
	Talking About the A (Preview) Spinning this from the "obstacles" thread... I think it's pretty rare in Alanon to find a person who never talks about their A. Certainly when new in the program, you want to vent and try to communicate your situation, but after a while you begin to realize that we've all been through it in o...	barisax	8	662	Feb 14, 2009 by Goodgran
	Loving someone that we don't really like~ (Preview) I read somewhere awhile back that there is a fine line between love and hate. I never understood it then, but can now. When you first meet someone and begin dating, if it is the right person it leads to liking them and then to love.....a natural course of things. I still love my ex very much, but at...	shellyj123	5	533	Feb 14, 2009 by java
	Lonely~ volunteer or other ideas wanted (Preview) I've noticed since being in the program that the woman who had no time to do ANYTHING, now finds herself lacking something to do and even bored and lonely at times. I stay active with my reading, and my postings and my meetings. I have emailed MIP and volunteered also-but haven't heard back from...	shellyj123	5	604	Feb 14, 2009 by Jerry F
	Ease my troubles....that's what you do. (Preview) It's Valentines day..... To all of my MIP family....... 'The morning sun in all it's glory is filled with hope and comfort too, you fill my heart with gladness, take away my sadness, ease my troubles, that's what you do. Courtesy of 'van the man' morrison. Love to you all Ness	Ness	2	896	Feb 13, 2009 by Toto814
	chat room (Preview) Hello, When I tried to enter the chat room Service Unavailable appeared on my computer. I got on to here no problem. This has never happened before. I would really appreciate some feedback on this. Regards, daylight	daylight48	5	452	Feb 13, 2009 by daylight48
	4 weeks, 12 steps, the rest of my life (Preview) I have been with my AH for 8 years and in that time gone through cycles of hope and disappointment over and over again and each time given more of myself to 'support him'. Predictably (to everyone but me) things are back where they were again with him drinking and me depressed but this time my daughter is o...	Ickle Lynnie	16	551	Feb 13, 2009 by Ickle Lynnie
	A bit of gratitude to my MIP family~ (Preview) I came here yesterday and posted. I was feeling very down about myself and my recovery, feeling very alone in it all. Feeling like I was a huge disappointment to myself and others here and that I was talking the talk but not walking the walk. I have been going through a bit of depression since EABF...	shellyj123	3	403	Feb 13, 2009 by maresie
	I have to find my faith and my focus~ (Preview) I realized today after some meditation/prayer time, that I haven't been making my program or my HP my number one priority, and I haven't been trusting my HP or having faith in Him, it's almost like I took a step then forgot it. I've been letting myself get so caught up in my EXABF and the &q...	shellyj123	7	505	Feb 13, 2009 by Mobirdie
	Back on track (Preview) A couple of days ago I was feeling low and depressed and majorly unfocused. I got to spend some ample time on the chat line and go to some meetings so now I am feeling better. This program works if you work it! Tonight I have a f2f al-anon meeting I plan to go to, so that should help too. Thanks so much for being...	java	3	508	Feb 13, 2009 by Jozie
	No skills for this (Preview) Hi Alanoners, Haven't posted or responded much lately. I have alot going on at work as always. I do go to my f2f meetings about every two weeks. I go to AA almost every week (I offer to hold a separate meeting for Alanon). I read my literature daily and talk to my sponsor once a week. I feel like I make progres...	nmike	7	552	Feb 13, 2009 by Karilynn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.