Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Gailey · Gailey

My son will be in rehab 1 week tomorrow. He seems really good when I talk to him. He has been voted to be the community director (the go to guy as he called it) because he can get along with everyone. Last night a councelor ask him if he would be a guest speaker for guys who come in for only the weekend. I was surp...

drucilla06 · drucilla06

It has been said that we are drawn to alcoholics because they make US feel good about ourselves. That when we take care of them,complain about what they do,it makes US feel superior. I have seen this in myself but not just with alcoholics.I will carry on at work about how stupid people are, which I guess I...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I AM BEGINNING TO SEE MORE & MORE THAT I HAVE TOO MUCH TIME ON MY HANDS! I AM PROBABLY POSTING TOO MUCH BUT THEN AGAIN, I CAN ONLY GET TO THE COMPUTER 3 OR 4 DAYS A WEEK FOR ONE HOUR A DAY! I GUESS I AM ALWAYS "SECOND GUESSING" MYSELF, TOO! TOO MUCH TIME TO THINK. I HAVE BEEN TRYING HOBBIES A LIT...

TF · TF

My therapist suggested that my AH and I sit down and discuss openly the resentments we have for each other. In my past therapy sessions we have been discussing how the past has hurt me and how i am having a hard time letting go of it. She suggested we do this and warned it would be painful. I brought it up t...

Bluelady · Bluelady

I posted last week for the first time when I learned my daughter has a drinking problem. She lives in another town and kept it well hiden, until her husband told us. She is in outpatient program now. First meeting was last Sat. My question is: is there anything I can say or do to help her in this journey or an...

Suzannah · Suzannah

It has to be said that there are unsung heros on this board and I for one want to recognise them. They are the people who dedicate time and effort and work "backstage" for the good of others. We are so lucky here to have such people on this board to keep it safe from abuse. MIP has played an enormo...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Well after a day yesterday of feeling off and making a BIG mistake at work, and having to work over to fix it all, I decided to make today a "me" day and took the day off to try and gather myself together a bit. I have been feeling off and struggling all week and it is showing in every area of my life...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Spent much of this weekend not feeling well, so while lying around I had some time to reflect on things a bit. I never sit still, have the hardest time with it and this weekend I had no choice.......think HP really just wanted me to slow down and take care of me for a bit. Before AlAnon I would have felt trem...

ditto · ditto

I need some of your thoughts and experience please. The situation is that I was happily married for 18 years to my first husband. He died. Five years later I married my second husband. I had no idea he was an a. I figure it out in the 3rd month of our marriage. By the 6th month of our marriage the verbal a...

SWgal · SWgal

Hi all. I am new here and pretty hopeless that things in my life will get any better, but coming to sites like this and reading about other people in the same situation as me makes me feel less alone. I am married to an alcoholic. We have two young children. AH's behavior is getting worse and worse. He drin...

Citizen · Citizen

First pardon my misuse of lingo. Still learning it. the background: (optional reading lol) I've been seeing a therapist to deal with the mess my life has become, and as I get everything straight one of the things i have to deal with is my marriage. As the story goes, I had to hit rock bottom before I'd...

Va · Va

Roomate loves to drink and use pills, (wine beer, booze). It is all good. Any suggestions? Wouldn't mind so much if didn't have effect on the household. Has affected work, friends, all for decades. However, nothing is her fault, and all others are at fault.

MissyPoo · MissyPoo

Thanks again to everyone for your prayers.., I have posted an update in the chain below... Knowing you are all here telling me I am not crazy is a BIG HELP. AH has rounded up the troops in his support and has the neighbours, his family etc, thinking I am some crazed dusgruntled wife getting ready to lea...

debilyn · debilyn

It really is unnerving to see a person you have known all your life, not be anything like they were. Even when he used before, he is nothing like that drunk anymore at all either. Have learned to detach so well I forget to go visit him in prison. I don't grieve for him or think about him anymore. I am so glad, e...

uptheleft · uptheleft

Hi everyone and thank you for this wonderful website and all the support you give. I have not gone to any meetings yet and have only recently thought about becoming involved in anything like this. I am 30 years old, married with a 2 month old boy. My father is an alcoholic and has been since I can remember...

Cashey100 · Cashey100

I need help. I'm in a dysfunctional relationship with my Mom and Dad. I'm a 30 year old guy who is having trouble setting boundaries and having a normal relationship with them. I am currently on a "vacation" staying in my hometown for the next few days. My parents are older (mid 60s) and the...

ImSoTired · ImSoTired

This is my second posting. I am in the process of re-working the steps...well I am just now starting again anyways. I have had just an awful day dealing with my A. I have had many slip ups where I have yelled at him because he was annoying me, or bullying the kids. How can I not defend them...and myself? ...

Gailey · Gailey

was on step 4. I have really never done a step 4 yet. Last night someone spoke on envy. I guess I really never thought of that as being a character flaw but my eyes were open to it then. I, too, am envious of families that seem to have it all together...talking about their grown kids's jobs, where they are goi...

hmunkster · hmunkster

Hi everyone! This is my first time posting. I've never been to an Al-Anon meeting, but friends have told me I should go. For some reason I'm hesitant. My husband has been hiding alcohol and drinking in secret off and on during the 10 years we've been married. He goes through periods of months where he sto...

Rora · Rora

Lately I've been questioning myself about my decisions about my separation from my exaH. It'll be a year that we've been separated so I can legally file for divorce, if that's what I choose. But the questions have all been so invasive in my mind... Is this what I want? Is this what I need? Is there rea...

Suzannah · Suzannah

" God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change Courage to change the things I can And the wisdom to know the difference. " The more I say this prayer the more I find myself reaching out for it and living it. It feels like it is beginning to really soak in through every pore in my b...

maresie · maresie

The other night I met a local artist in the park. We had a lovely conversation and it was nice to talk to someone who is cultured and articulate. At the same time what stood out for me in the conversation was that he said he had a drinking issue. In fact he made a real big deal of the fact I didn't drink. In the...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, Last night something amazing happened for me. There is a woman at my F2F who is putting on a seminar on her own and has been passing around a flyer at our F2F during the meeting when we make announcements. I have wanted to say something because it is alanon sanctioned and should be announced bef...

MyThoughts2U2 · MyThoughts2U2

So here I sit on my last day on the job where I have worked for 4 years. A new adventure is ready to begin and I still am just stuck on the next move for me. I have tried to see which direction my HP is pointing with no clear answer. Probably there have been signs, but I missed them of course! I have to have faith th...

Gailey · Gailey

how can you ever move on and begin a new life without them. I know this is going to sound like a self pity post but every time I read a post from a spouse that has separated from their A and has gone on to live a better life, met someone new, maybe got married and could leave that A life behind I do find myself bein...

ImSoTired · ImSoTired

My name is Wendy and I am the mother of one. I am surrounded by alcoholics which is what finds me here. I am new to this board, and let me tell you how happy I am to have finally got the courage to come. I attended a couple local Alanon meetings earlier this year and it really helped, but my boyfriend found ou...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), Just wanted to take a few moments and wish you all a HAPPY FALL! I love the changing of the seasons. This is surely HP in all his/her glory. The leaves have already started to change here in the northeast. It's apple picking time. The apples are sweeter than ever and they are expectin...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I am really struggling lately, badly. I believe A LOT of it is the time of year....it's a really hard time of year for me (sad because Fall is my all time FAVORITE SEASON!!), and I can feel it getting harder daily, and I'm afraid to be honest. I know HP is here with me and by my side and I can't loose sight of t...

lonewolfmama · lonewolfmama

Although it is the middle of the night I cannot sleep. I am so thankful for this message board full of like souls for helping to remind me how crazy it can SEEM when in an alcoholic relationship. As a public figure in a very small community, it's hard to get f2f or alanon meetings and the support of the folk...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Turns out I was a little sick and got a lot sicker. I have been home in bed for two days solid nobody to take care of me... and today back at work but feeling miserable. Still better than I was but not really well enough to be here. I didn't have the sick time to take the last two days off tho. In my highly med...

MyThoughts2U2 · MyThoughts2U2

Does anyone have any thoughts on the 3rd and 11th steps and how to apply them in times of difficulty?

MissyPoo · MissyPoo

I have been reading (and re-reading) Getting them Sober. One of the chapters came into play full force for me last weekend. "Don't beg them to Stay" I had been noticing that my AH had been going to less and less AA meetings and more and more I saw signs that he had been drinking. I ignored all...

tkyater2003 · tkyater2003

my email is (Personal Email and phone number removed) thnk u all i need u alllllllllllllllll need u all putor down and so am i down Please PM Terri if you would like her personal email address and phone number. They have been removed from this public post. - tlcate -- Edited by tlcate on Thursday 24th of S...

lucky · lucky

I am stuck. I cannot figure out how to productively find the lines that separate this disease from one's personal responsibility. I understand that alcoholism is a disease. I understand that many of the things that have happened are just going to linger, or I am going to have to let them go. I have to for...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello and Hugs Everyone, I have many mixed emotions right now. Just letting them be, I am really not trying to figure them out. I saw my A Hubby for the first time in 3 1/2 weeks since I made him leave. He stopped at my office to pick up mapquest directions to the rehab facility he has finally decided to giv...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

What do I do? Is she helpless? I am sitting here next to her trying to get into the computer--she is not able to do anything without help! I am so frustrated! I guess sometimes some people can't get into their emails without some kind of help. Maybe she will never be computer--savvy? I need support! he...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Hi folks, Just what I needed and I did as I promised. Prayers offered up for all of you...not just the ones who had asked for them. So many people asking for prayers and needing them right now. I attended a horrendous medical this morning and came away feeling like the lowest form of pond life. Sick of PAI...

woopsadaisy · woopsadaisy

Ok. My way isn't working out so hot. The idea I had implanted that I am master of my own destiny lent itself to a lot of manipulations of facts, and some distortions of reality. The consequence of this was that while oft times, I DID get to where I wanted to go, I was mislead into thinking I was somehow more &q...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Why have I got something that looks like a stick of dynamite against my Topic tile? on my previous post? AND THIS ONE? Suz -- Edited by Suzannah on Wednesday 23rd of September 2009 10:46:30 AM

mominneed · mominneed

I did have a rough day yesterday and can feel the pent-up stress slowly leaving my body. I made it to my 2nd Al Anon meeting last night-this one was wonderful. We spoke of gratitude and being grateful for small things each day. I have slept better the last 2 nights (although did throw up yesterday a.m....

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

I was talking with a few program friends when this subject sorta came up. One friend was discussing how she has learned to "take care of me (hereself) by dressing up, and really glamming up, as well as by learning to stand up for herself and no longer let people walk all over her. She mentioned an un...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just for today it is all about me! Today I am sitting here with a lot of frustration & confusion. I am feeling like making it an "all about me" day! I need to take care of me first. I know that I need to count on me & hope that I don't get in other peoples' way. Sometimes I feel lost & al...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I sure had an action packed weekend. I went out alone on Friday night and managed to have a really fun evening dancing with gorgeous guys and singing karaoke and meeting people to talk to since no one I knew was there (that's highly unusual on a Friday night). At first I was kind of bummed because I could...

maresie · maresie

I have heard today the stolen check will not be replaced for a month or more. I feel absolutely victimized and wronged and upset to say the least. I feel like I always lose and lose and lose and lose some more. I am absolutely totally fed up with trying. Maresie.

Bluelady · Bluelady

I'm thinking of changing my name, it should be the Queen of Denile. Mind you just found out about my daughter's drinking problem this week end. She kept it well hid from me or I just didn't let myself see. OK if I am honest I knew she drank but being a alcoholic no way. I still don't believe it. When I called he...

Gailey · Gailey

I just got back from dropping my A son off at a 28 day rehab facility. Please keep him in your prayers and me so that I will attend more f2f meetings than I have been.

emma · emma

Hi All, I've tried to enter the chat room the last day or so and got a warning message "The application's digital signature has an error. Do you want to run the application?" I've been away from mip for a few months -- is there a current problem with application of the chatroom? Thanks, emma...

mia883 · mia883

I found difficult to cope with this friend of mine who has been my partner for a while. She is very strong and constantly brings self defeating words. This bullying attitude is described very well "in an article on matrifocus.com How can use Alanon to stop being attacked from this self defeatin...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp... Made it thru another eventful weekend... Boys had a Soccer Game 1st thing in the morning on Saturday... I had thought about goin to camp, but knew that there was just to much to get done at home for that to happen... I did get alot done, and I am very grateful for that, and in doing so I found quite a bi...

artie · artie

After reading such sad stories here, I feel so blessed since my husband has many wonderful qualities, but I do believe he is an A. His father was one - died of liver cancer. Husband involved in church, but has been drinking since I've know him-30+years. Drinking has increased to now around 3 hard l...

Melissa21 · Melissa21

Finally I am in my new apartment! 4 months ago I left my A, boy time sure flies by quickly! Things are going good! The move went real well much better than I had expected (maybe because I had low expectations since I had a few A"s helping me-- brothers friends). I am almost done unpacking!! And it's ni...

maggiemayhem · maggiemayhem

Hello... I am new to this site and fairly new Al Anon. I have a sister who is twenty years sober and a ABF who was in recovery last time I saw him. So I have some knowledge on how things work in Al Anon and AA. I have attended two online meetings(wonderful) and hope to do a f2f soon. I have read the big book an...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

I've been pretty proud of myself lately. I've been dealing with a lot of stressful stuff and haven't needed to take a Xanax in almost a month. Every day and every night I would thank God in my prayers for giving me strength. My husband left for the pain management facility in Tucson on Saturday for a 4-...

mominneed · mominneed

Thanks for all the help I received in the last day or so. I did attend my 1st Al Anon meeting tonight and am starting to feel that weight on my heart ease up. Someone today told me to look at my son's disease as "just that": if it was any other illness, would I feel it is my fault he has it? It is not...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

On my way to work every day, me and my HP usually chat up a storm:) Actually he listens and I let all my thoughts and feelings fly with total abandon. He seems good with that:) I had a huge moment of clarity over the weekend as I was "browsing" most of the day yesterday off and on,almost obsess...

Rora · Rora

Its never takes long for when the exaH and I get f2f to end up in disagreement. Today, there was a concerning medical issue with our little boy and we both wanted to be part of the doc appt. I thought, it's okay to be united for our son, right? Before long it was the same old same old...best described as us bo...

Wishfulmom · Wishfulmom

Hi. I'm Lori. I've been reading on here for several weeks now and have attended local meetings for about the same time. I have an AH and am thinking of moving out. He hasn't drank in several weeks after a horrible evening of fighting but is definetly in the dry drunk stages. He's miserable and surly t...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((( Everyone ))))))) For anyone who has never read it.... this is the text of a pamphelet that I recieved at my very first alanon meeting. It really opened my eyes, and helped me see that I am not crazy... well, ok... I was not alone. (I still may be crazy!) http://www.bendfeldt.com/alcholism....

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

Happy Monday all Boy have I been lost lately. Maybe not LOST but working through alot of things. I've been doing alot of inner child work and examination and I probably should have been doing this in conjunction with my sponsor BUT, I'm finding out ALOT about ME and my issues. I really belong in an ACOA gr...

67mermaid · 67mermaid

Hi there.... I am not sure where to start so here is a little history. I used to be a Cub Scout Den leader, I worked with lots of little guys and there parents doing activities and learning about the outdoors. We always had this one father who was very invlolved and active with the group, but he often smelle...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	update on son in rehab (Preview) My son will be in rehab 1 week tomorrow. He seems really good when I talk to him. He has been voted to be the community director (the go to guy as he called it) because he can get along with everyone. Last night a councelor ask him if he would be a guest speaker for guys who come in for only the weekend. I was surp...	Gailey	5	782	Sep 29, 2009 by Rita G
	Is this true?? (Preview) It has been said that we are drawn to alcoholics because they make US feel good about ourselves. That when we take care of them,complain about what they do,it makes US feel superior. I have seen this in myself but not just with alcoholics.I will carry on at work about how stupid people are, which I guess I...	drucilla06	10	824	Sep 29, 2009 by carolinagirl
	too much time on my hands! (Preview) I AM BEGINNING TO SEE MORE & MORE THAT I HAVE TOO MUCH TIME ON MY HANDS! I AM PROBABLY POSTING TOO MUCH BUT THEN AGAIN, I CAN ONLY GET TO THE COMPUTER 3 OR 4 DAYS A WEEK FOR ONE HOUR A DAY! I GUESS I AM ALWAYS "SECOND GUESSING" MYSELF, TOO! TOO MUCH TIME TO THINK. I HAVE BEEN TRYING HOBBIES A LIT...	Hoot Nanny	4	613	Sep 29, 2009 by Jerry F
	Is it a good idea???? (Preview) My therapist suggested that my AH and I sit down and discuss openly the resentments we have for each other. In my past therapy sessions we have been discussing how the past has hurt me and how i am having a hard time letting go of it. She suggested we do this and warned it would be painful. I brought it up t...	TF	3	690	Sep 29, 2009 by abbyal
	Need your advice (Preview) I posted last week for the first time when I learned my daughter has a drinking problem. She lives in another town and kept it well hiden, until her husband told us. She is in outpatient program now. First meeting was last Sat. My question is: is there anything I can say or do to help her in this journey or an...	Bluelady	3	740	Sep 29, 2009 by abbyal
	In the Service to others (Preview) It has to be said that there are unsung heros on this board and I for one want to recognise them. They are the people who dedicate time and effort and work "backstage" for the good of others. We are so lucky here to have such people on this board to keep it safe from abuse. MIP has played an enormo...	Suzannah	6	628	Sep 28, 2009 by Suzannah
	Made it a "me" day.....my awakening (Preview) Well after a day yesterday of feeling off and making a BIG mistake at work, and having to work over to fix it all, I decided to make today a "me" day and took the day off to try and gather myself together a bit. I have been feeling off and struggling all week and it is showing in every area of my life...	shellyj123	2	628	Sep 28, 2009 by Hoot Nanny
	It REALLY is ok to use White Out!!!!! -Letting go of guilt and perfection... (Preview) Spent much of this weekend not feeling well, so while lying around I had some time to reflect on things a bit. I never sit still, have the hardest time with it and this weekend I had no choice.......think HP really just wanted me to slow down and take care of me for a bit. Before AlAnon I would have felt trem...	shellyj123	4	771	Sep 28, 2009 by penelope
	Is It Me? (Preview) I need some of your thoughts and experience please. The situation is that I was happily married for 18 years to my first husband. He died. Five years later I married my second husband. I had no idea he was an a. I figure it out in the 3rd month of our marriage. By the 6th month of our marriage the verbal a...	ditto	3	615	Sep 28, 2009 by maresie
	Newbie (Preview) Hi all. I am new here and pretty hopeless that things in my life will get any better, but coming to sites like this and reading about other people in the same situation as me makes me feel less alone. I am married to an alcoholic. We have two young children. AH's behavior is getting worse and worse. He drin...	SWgal	8	608	Sep 28, 2009 by maresie
	Newbie w/ Dumb question: How can I be sure my A is an A? (Preview) First pardon my misuse of lingo. Still learning it. the background: (optional reading lol) I've been seeing a therapist to deal with the mess my life has become, and as I get everything straight one of the things i have to deal with is my marriage. As the story goes, I had to hit rock bottom before I'd...	Citizen	9	755	Sep 28, 2009 by maresie
	Roomate is in denial (Preview) Roomate loves to drink and use pills, (wine beer, booze). It is all good. Any suggestions? Wouldn't mind so much if didn't have effect on the household. Has affected work, friends, all for decades. However, nothing is her fault, and all others are at fault.	Va	2	626	Sep 28, 2009 by maresie
	I'm OK... Update in chain below.... (Preview) Thanks again to everyone for your prayers.., I have posted an update in the chain below... Knowing you are all here telling me I am not crazy is a BIG HELP. AH has rounded up the troops in his support and has the neighbours, his family etc, thinking I am some crazed dusgruntled wife getting ready to lea...	MissyPoo	2	579	Sep 28, 2009 by blender_girl
	It is so strange. (Preview) It really is unnerving to see a person you have known all your life, not be anything like they were. Even when he used before, he is nothing like that drunk anymore at all either. Have learned to detach so well I forget to go visit him in prison. I don't grieve for him or think about him anymore. I am so glad, e...	debilyn	2	519	Sep 27, 2009 by Jozie
	Hi, I'm a newbie. Long Intro....Thanks for reading. (Preview) Hi everyone and thank you for this wonderful website and all the support you give. I have not gone to any meetings yet and have only recently thought about becoming involved in anything like this. I am 30 years old, married with a 2 month old boy. My father is an alcoholic and has been since I can remember...	uptheleft	4	635	Sep 27, 2009 by maresie
	Crazy dysfunctional parents... trapped Adult Child... please help! (Preview) I need help. I'm in a dysfunctional relationship with my Mom and Dad. I'm a 30 year old guy who is having trouble setting boundaries and having a normal relationship with them. I am currently on a "vacation" staying in my hometown for the next few days. My parents are older (mid 60s) and the...	Cashey100	8	902	Sep 27, 2009 by newday
	Hope I can cope tonight.... (Preview) This is my second posting. I am in the process of re-working the steps...well I am just now starting again anyways. I have had just an awful day dealing with my A. I have had many slip ups where I have yelled at him because he was annoying me, or bullying the kids. How can I not defend them...and myself? ...	ImSoTired	2	673	Sep 27, 2009 by debilyn
	My f2f last night...... (Preview) was on step 4. I have really never done a step 4 yet. Last night someone spoke on envy. I guess I really never thought of that as being a character flaw but my eyes were open to it then. I, too, am envious of families that seem to have it all together...talking about their grown kids's jobs, where they are goi...	Gailey	3	642	Sep 26, 2009 by tea2
	Husband Hides Vodka (Preview) Hi everyone! This is my first time posting. I've never been to an Al-Anon meeting, but friends have told me I should go. For some reason I'm hesitant. My husband has been hiding alcohol and drinking in secret off and on during the 10 years we've been married. He goes through periods of months where he sto...	hmunkster	6	6908	Sep 26, 2009 by neshema2
	I start to question myself and HP shows up ever reminding.... (Preview) Lately I've been questioning myself about my decisions about my separation from my exaH. It'll be a year that we've been separated so I can legally file for divorce, if that's what I choose. But the questions have all been so invasive in my mind... Is this what I want? Is this what I need? Is there rea...	Rora	5	670	Sep 26, 2009 by neshema2
	God grant me the serenity... (Preview) " God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change Courage to change the things I can And the wisdom to know the difference. " The more I say this prayer the more I find myself reaching out for it and living it. It feels like it is beginning to really soak in through every pore in my b...	Suzannah	7	769	Sep 26, 2009 by neshema2
	change in rprocess. (Preview) The other night I met a local artist in the park. We had a lovely conversation and it was nice to talk to someone who is cultured and articulate. At the same time what stood out for me in the conversation was that he said he had a drinking issue. In fact he made a real big deal of the fact I didn't drink. In the...	maresie	8	692	Sep 26, 2009 by tea2
	Whose that girl? (Preview) Hi family, Last night something amazing happened for me. There is a woman at my F2F who is putting on a seminar on her own and has been passing around a flyer at our F2F during the meeting when we make announcements. I have wanted to say something because it is alanon sanctioned and should be announced bef...	Mandy123	8	750	Sep 26, 2009 by sunshines1
	Transitions (Preview) So here I sit on my last day on the job where I have worked for 4 years. A new adventure is ready to begin and I still am just stuck on the next move for me. I have tried to see which direction my HP is pointing with no clear answer. Probably there have been signs, but I missed them of course! I have to have faith th...	MyThoughts2U2	3	805	Sep 25, 2009 by Jen
	when your A is your child..................... (Preview) how can you ever move on and begin a new life without them. I know this is going to sound like a self pity post but every time I read a post from a spouse that has separated from their A and has gone on to live a better life, met someone new, maybe got married and could leave that A life behind I do find myself bein...	Gailey	9	683	Sep 25, 2009 by Ness
	My Into and some history (Preview) My name is Wendy and I am the mother of one. I am surrounded by alcoholics which is what finds me here. I am new to this board, and let me tell you how happy I am to have finally got the courage to come. I attended a couple local Alanon meetings earlier this year and it really helped, but my boyfriend found ou...	ImSoTired	3	750	Sep 25, 2009 by Mandy123
	Happy Fall! (Preview) (((Family))), Just wanted to take a few moments and wish you all a HAPPY FALL! I love the changing of the seasons. This is surely HP in all his/her glory. The leaves have already started to change here in the northeast. It's apple picking time. The apples are sweeter than ever and they are expectin...	Karilynn	4	485	Sep 24, 2009 by tea2
	Feeling completely "off"...the past is creeping in.......in need of some ESH..... (Preview) I am really struggling lately, badly. I believe A LOT of it is the time of year....it's a really hard time of year for me (sad because Fall is my all time FAVORITE SEASON!!), and I can feel it getting harder daily, and I'm afraid to be honest. I know HP is here with me and by my side and I can't loose sight of t...	shellyj123	8	555	Sep 24, 2009 by ImSoTired
	Planning to Leave...finally! (Preview) Although it is the middle of the night I cannot sleep. I am so thankful for this message board full of like souls for helping to remind me how crazy it can SEEM when in an alcoholic relationship. As a public figure in a very small community, it's hard to get f2f or alanon meetings and the support of the folk...	lonewolfmama	7	639	Sep 24, 2009 by maresie
	I'm so sick (Preview) Turns out I was a little sick and got a lot sicker. I have been home in bed for two days solid nobody to take care of me... and today back at work but feeling miserable. Still better than I was but not really well enough to be here. I didn't have the sick time to take the last two days off tho. In my highly med...	carolinagirl	7	657	Sep 24, 2009 by maresie
	3rd and 11th Steps (Preview) Does anyone have any thoughts on the 3rd and 11th steps and how to apply them in times of difficulty?	MyThoughts2U2	6	733	Sep 24, 2009 by MyThoughts2U2
	Leaving your AH .... (Preview) I have been reading (and re-reading) Getting them Sober. One of the chapters came into play full force for me last weekend. "Don't beg them to Stay" I had been noticing that my AH had been going to less and less AA meetings and more and more I saw signs that he had been drinking. I ignored all...	MissyPoo	10	846	Sep 24, 2009 by neshema2
	yessss need u alll pleaseeeeeee need u all please putor is down and so am i im down down downn (Preview) my email is (Personal Email and phone number removed) thnk u all i need u alllllllllllllllll need u all putor down and so am i down Please PM Terri if you would like her personal email address and phone number. They have been removed from this public post. - tlcate -- Edited by tlcate on Thursday 24th of S...	tkyater2003	0	362	Sep 24, 2009 by tkyater2003
	how to tell the difference (Preview) I am stuck. I cannot figure out how to productively find the lines that separate this disease from one's personal responsibility. I understand that alcoholism is a disease. I understand that many of the things that have happened are just going to linger, or I am going to have to let them go. I have to for...	lucky	8	647	Sep 24, 2009 by lucky
	I saw AHubby for the first time in 3 1/2 weeks...it was bitter sweet (Preview) Hello and Hugs Everyone, I have many mixed emotions right now. Just letting them be, I am really not trying to figure them out. I saw my A Hubby for the first time in 3 1/2 weeks since I made him leave. He stopped at my office to pick up mapquest directions to the rehab facility he has finally decided to giv...	Sincerely	6	694	Sep 24, 2009 by Jerry F
	here I go again--is my mom helpless? (Preview) What do I do? Is she helpless? I am sitting here next to her trying to get into the computer--she is not able to do anything without help! I am so frustrated! I guess sometimes some people can't get into their emails without some kind of help. Maybe she will never be computer--savvy? I need support! he...	Hoot Nanny	3	690	Sep 23, 2009 by Loupiness
	Checking in after my Pilgrimage and my time out before I go into hospital yet again... (Preview) Hi folks, Just what I needed and I did as I promised. Prayers offered up for all of you...not just the ones who had asked for them. So many people asking for prayers and needing them right now. I attended a horrendous medical this morning and came away feeling like the lowest form of pond life. Sick of PAI...	Suzannah	3	626	Sep 23, 2009 by Christy
	revisiting 1 and 2 (Preview) Ok. My way isn't working out so hot. The idea I had implanted that I am master of my own destiny lent itself to a lot of manipulations of facts, and some distortions of reality. The consequence of this was that while oft times, I DID get to where I wanted to go, I was mislead into thinking I was somehow more &q...	woopsadaisy	4	593	Sep 23, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	By the way, just what IS that sign against my Topic title? (Preview) Why have I got something that looks like a stick of dynamite against my Topic tile? on my previous post? AND THIS ONE? Suz -- Edited by Suzannah on Wednesday 23rd of September 2009 10:46:30 AM	Suzannah	4	645	Sep 23, 2009 by debilyn
	second al anon meeting-slowly getting this! (Preview) I did have a rough day yesterday and can feel the pent-up stress slowly leaving my body. I made it to my 2nd Al Anon meeting last night-this one was wonderful. We spoke of gratitude and being grateful for small things each day. I have slept better the last 2 nights (although did throw up yesterday a.m....	mominneed	2	575	Sep 23, 2009 by Rora
	regained self esteem vs. narcissisum (Preview) I was talking with a few program friends when this subject sorta came up. One friend was discussing how she has learned to "take care of me (hereself) by dressing up, and really glamming up, as well as by learning to stand up for herself and no longer let people walk all over her. She mentioned an un...	MaryPoppins	5	909	Sep 23, 2009 by lucky
	maybe today--it is all about me! (Preview) Just for today it is all about me! Today I am sitting here with a lot of frustration & confusion. I am feeling like making it an "all about me" day! I need to take care of me first. I know that I need to count on me & hope that I don't get in other peoples' way. Sometimes I feel lost & al...	Hoot Nanny	2	520	Sep 23, 2009 by Sincerely
	Had a great weekend (Preview) I sure had an action packed weekend. I went out alone on Friday night and managed to have a really fun evening dancing with gorgeous guys and singing karaoke and meeting people to talk to since no one I knew was there (that's highly unusual on a Friday night). At first I was kind of bummed because I could...	carolinagirl	2	556	Sep 23, 2009 by maire rua
	Latest news on the stolen check (Preview) I have heard today the stolen check will not be replaced for a month or more. I feel absolutely victimized and wronged and upset to say the least. I feel like I always lose and lose and lose and lose some more. I am absolutely totally fed up with trying. Maresie.	maresie	6	834	Sep 23, 2009 by maire rua
	Queen of Denial (Preview) I'm thinking of changing my name, it should be the Queen of Denile. Mind you just found out about my daughter's drinking problem this week end. She kept it well hid from me or I just didn't let myself see. OK if I am honest I knew she drank but being a alcoholic no way. I still don't believe it. When I called he...	Bluelady	2	634	Sep 23, 2009 by Loupiness
	another new beginnng (Preview) I just got back from dropping my A son off at a 28 day rehab facility. Please keep him in your prayers and me so that I will attend more f2f meetings than I have been.	Gailey	8	646	Sep 23, 2009 by Karilynn
	MIP Chat room (Preview) Hi All, I've tried to enter the chat room the last day or so and got a warning message "The application's digital signature has an error. Do you want to run the application?" I've been away from mip for a few months -- is there a current problem with application of the chatroom? Thanks, emma...	emma	3	3821	Sep 22, 2009 by Jen
	How to cope with an other woman which has RA? (Preview) I found difficult to cope with this friend of mine who has been my partner for a while. She is very strong and constantly brings self defeating words. This bullying attitude is described very well "in an article on matrifocus.com How can use Alanon to stop being attacked from this self defeatin...	mia883	3	806	Sep 22, 2009 by Christy
	Thankful... (Preview) Welp... Made it thru another eventful weekend... Boys had a Soccer Game 1st thing in the morning on Saturday... I had thought about goin to camp, but knew that there was just to much to get done at home for that to happen... I did get alot done, and I am very grateful for that, and in doing so I found quite a bi...	Jozie	4	570	Sep 22, 2009 by MyThoughts2U2
	Christian AH (Preview) After reading such sad stories here, I feel so blessed since my husband has many wonderful qualities, but I do believe he is an A. His father was one - died of liver cancer. Husband involved in church, but has been drinking since I've know him-30+years. Drinking has increased to now around 3 hard l...	artie	3	694	Sep 22, 2009 by abbyal
	Home sweet home! (Preview) Finally I am in my new apartment! 4 months ago I left my A, boy time sure flies by quickly! Things are going good! The move went real well much better than I had expected (maybe because I had low expectations since I had a few A"s helping me-- brothers friends). I am almost done unpacking!! And it's ni...	Melissa21	9	759	Sep 22, 2009 by Jozie
	Newbie here.. (Preview) Hello... I am new to this site and fairly new Al Anon. I have a sister who is twenty years sober and a ABF who was in recovery last time I saw him. So I have some knowledge on how things work in Al Anon and AA. I have attended two online meetings(wonderful) and hope to do a f2f soon. I have read the big book an...	maggiemayhem	5	615	Sep 22, 2009 by maggiemayhem
	Was doing better (Preview) I've been pretty proud of myself lately. I've been dealing with a lot of stressful stuff and haven't needed to take a Xanax in almost a month. Every day and every night I would thank God in my prayers for giving me strength. My husband left for the pain management facility in Tucson on Saturday for a 4-...	N8SMOM	3	520	Sep 22, 2009 by N8SMOM
	a big Step for mominneed (Preview) Thanks for all the help I received in the last day or so. I did attend my 1st Al Anon meeting tonight and am starting to feel that weight on my heart ease up. Someone today told me to look at my son's disease as "just that": if it was any other illness, would I feel it is my fault he has it? It is not...	mominneed	4	615	Sep 22, 2009 by emma
	Hiding from me..... in the online personals..... (Preview) On my way to work every day, me and my HP usually chat up a storm:) Actually he listens and I let all my thoughts and feelings fly with total abandon. He seems good with that:) I had a huge moment of clarity over the weekend as I was "browsing" most of the day yesterday off and on,almost obsess...	shellyj123	6	620	Sep 22, 2009 by kitty
	Its never good when the exaH and I get f2f... (Preview) Its never takes long for when the exaH and I get f2f to end up in disagreement. Today, there was a concerning medical issue with our little boy and we both wanted to be part of the doc appt. I thought, it's okay to be united for our son, right? Before long it was the same old same old...best described as us bo...	Rora	6	602	Sep 22, 2009 by glad lee
	New here and introduction (Preview) Hi. I'm Lori. I've been reading on here for several weeks now and have attended local meetings for about the same time. I have an AH and am thinking of moving out. He hasn't drank in several weeks after a horrible evening of fighting but is definetly in the dry drunk stages. He's miserable and surly t...	Wishfulmom	3	575	Sep 21, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	A merry-go-round named denial (Preview) ((((((( Everyone ))))))) For anyone who has never read it.... this is the text of a pamphelet that I recieved at my very first alanon meeting. It really opened my eyes, and helped me see that I am not crazy... well, ok... I was not alone. (I still may be crazy!) http://www.bendfeldt.com/alcholism....	rtexas	4	5089	Sep 21, 2009 by Jennifer
	Feeling Overwhelmed by my Character Defects (Preview) Happy Monday all Boy have I been lost lately. Maybe not LOST but working through alot of things. I've been doing alot of inner child work and examination and I probably should have been doing this in conjunction with my sponsor BUT, I'm finding out ALOT about ME and my issues. I really belong in an ACOA gr...	RunnerChick	5	3785	Sep 21, 2009 by debilyn
	Im new! Need help. (Preview) Hi there.... I am not sure where to start so here is a little history. I used to be a Cub Scout Den leader, I worked with lots of little guys and there parents doing activities and learning about the outdoors. We always had this one father who was very invlolved and active with the group, but he often smelle...	67mermaid	4	599	Sep 21, 2009 by Andrea12
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.