The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well, the fallout came from the can of worms I opened with the ex. Just when I think I'm done I'm cutting off all contact there he is again and I'm sure he feels the same about me. I wish we could just be civil to eachother, be friends and nothing more at this point. I don't know if it's possible but I guess all things are with time. I had just decided Saturday night that I would let it go and not mess with him anymore and then today there's an email for me that had been in my inbox since Saturday and I just now got it. I almost deleted it without reading. I ended up reading it and replying.
I got a call yesterday that my ex AH left his gf in California and is planning on moving back to this area.
I have been having trouble getting back on track with the diet and exercise and not drinking/smoking thing since I first got sick. I was going to start back today but then i got a salad at the mexican restaurant and they just had to put chips and salsa in the bag... LOL
I know I was not often owning my fantasy of what could be.
I also know that the ex A and many others could hook me in very very easily. I am now boundary upped and I am not so available to be hooked in.
I also know for me that I could not stop being hooked in by the ex A as long as he was able to give something. When he got to the point of not being able to provide anything at all I could let go. I think that says a lot about my standards, my denial and my boundaries.
((((CG)))) It is soooo hard to get back on track sometimes. I have been struggling and digging in with all I have lately to just BE. I'm not really moving forward but I'm not looking back as much as I once did either, and when I do, I realize even though I didn't like it at the time, that I am right where Im meant to be right now, even if it is stuck. And I realize that I HAVE to trust my HP and His will for me and I do believe that what comes my way next will be even better-and that is what keeps me going, or standing still-lol, as I am right now.
You are making progress, you had a slip and we ALL have those. Dust yourself off, and get back on track....I'm sure if you look around you'll see several of your MIP family leading the way to Serenity Park for ya:)
Love and peace shelly
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Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror!
I would say also that I no longer presume I know what anyone but myself thinks or their motives. I would have to check it out with them. Presuming got me into some very very hot water.
