The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
First, can anyone tell me the name of that new CAL book that has a lot of new readings and sup-posedly adult child stuff? I saw one recently and haven;t since and would like ot get one - pinkish or purple cover as I recall...
quick share: I am SO sad abotu the state of meetings where I am. They are really, generally, very sick. It happens. I am not blaming or whatever - but no matter how much you read the traditions or suggest things, it is ignored. Meetings have been hijacked by other people because they didn;t think al anon was being done right. Letters flying back and forth to GSO fighting over incidents and fussing over how to scare newcomers the minute they hit the door.
I thought I;d settled into a regular meeting where I could take what I liked...but then they started announcing that 'this meeting may have to close if we don;t get more members;. UGH! In front of a room of 20. Thing is, here, somehow, the 'meetings' have 'members' which aren;t like 'visitors'. If you are a 'member' you are in a special club that does all the service work. These 'members' meet outside of the regular meetings, and have business meetings, etc. Early on, when people were reading out 'regrets' from 'members' who couldn;t be there - and I questioned - I was told that 'things were done differently here' - WHY???
I've shared over and over that, even though I 'formally joined' a meeting, I did not want to be put above or below any other member. That the only requirement for membership is a problem of drinking in a relative or friend. This just doesn;t stick with most people here. This 'members' vs. 'visitors' thing is prevalent at every meeting, except an open CA mtg, in the entirety of Glasgow.
I desperately need to work on my recovery, so I am relying on forums like this, XA-speakers.org which has prerecorded meeting shares from AA and Al Anon, and keeping in touch with helpful recovery friends.
I've seen this before and it just makes me sick. Literally s-i-c-k. From some people trying to turn meeting into Christian prayer groups to people trying everything they can to dominate and hijack. This is the SAME crap I grew up with - not surprising - but I need recovery, Experience, Strength, Hope, sharing - not alapolitics!!
I've also put it out on ACA that I'd like to start a meeting...leaving it to my HP.
Now, my partners family, a very AC group indeed, have started with drama. The mother is an A by her own admission, the sister as codependant as could, be, and my partner - shellshocked and getting dumped on by all sides!
Hi Scott. I don't have any meetings at all near me and was struggling for support or contact with anyone who would know how I was feeling. However, I have found tremendous support on here, especially in the chat room (Where I post as Tish, by the way - easier to type than "Tattyhead"!)
I'm also from the UK although a lot further south than you! I suppose meetings organised by volunteers are easy to hijack by some people just for their own ends, with their own agendas. Don't know what the answer is, really. Even if you start your own you won't know who will turn up.
Just come and rant on here - it's very cathartic and no-one minds!
I have a CAL book Hope For Today. It's daily readings for those who grew up in an alcoholic home. It's my favorite book of all my CAL !!
We do have 2 daily meetings in the chat room! Most of what I have learned was from this website! I don't have much time to get to f2f meetings only been to a handful of them.
Im sure f2f is better, but if I can't do that daily/weekly coming here will do for me for now!
__________________
"Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip." Will Rogers
The latest book is Opening Our Hearts, Transforming Our Losses which can be bought from the Al-anon website, if that's the one you're thinking of.
Sorry you're not getting the best from your meetings.....I'm in Scotland (rural) and have a good little meeting, mostly four or five of us sometimes more. There is a worry that ours may fold due to lack of numbers.....visitors are always welcome!!
I think finding a good recovery group is hard going. I just have to let go. My recovery is so essential I really do not have it anymore to try to fix anyone but myself.
hey there, I'n the UK too - although a bit further south!
I pop into the chat room every so often - Tish, luckyeddie, Melissa, everyone else - it's a good supportive environment, or if you want a rant.
if you want a rant you can email me - we're all faced with the same disease and how to overcome it.
I've only been going to al-anon meetings for a couple of months and they have given me the hope and strenght I need, otherwise I would have just crumbled.
I'm getting to step 1 but it's a start, please don't give up
Am a fellow glaswegian who attend a very well populated meeting on a weekly basis. I've tried four extra meeting on top and all pretty big and I feel lucky as there are loads of meeting in Glasgow. I now have a very gentle lady who has agreed to be my sponsor and slowly work through the steps together.
I hope this doesn't stop you trying new meetings as I've come across some really good recovery in Glasgow.
Welcome to the board. Keep coming back
hugs
__________________
Courage is the discovery that you may not win, and trying when you know you can lose.
