The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I posted last week for the first time when I learned my daughter has a drinking problem. She lives in another town and kept it well hiden, until her husband told us. She is in outpatient program now. First meeting was last Sat. My question is: is there anything I can say or do to help her in this journey or anything I should not do. Your help would be very much appreciated for this is all new to me.
If she wants to help herself, she has to do it on her own. The best thing you can do is get to some face-to-face Al-Anon meetings. This disease affects the whole family, so if one person (the addict) is going to get well, then everyone should try to get well in their own way too.
And if she doesn't get well, Al-Anon can help you with that situation as well. It teaches us how to have serenity in our lives whether the alcoholic is drinking or not.
Blue my feedback is from experience only and shortly is.... Don't do anything that you alone come up with except attending as many face to face Al-Anon Family Group meetings in the next 90 days and then reasking the "what should I do?" question again. Use the white pages of your telephone book to find the meeting places and times in your area and/or someone who will talk to you one on one. Go to as many meeting...(see above) and get as much literature as you can and read it all. Learn and memorize the steps, traditions and slogans and listen, listen, listen...practice, practice, practice. After 90 days if you decide that what you have just done has been very helpful; continue to do it one day at a time. If you find it is not for you, you can go anywhere else and we will gladly refund your miseries. (ugh...didn't like hearing that and it never happened to me...yay!!) Keep coming back.
The best way to support is to find Al-Anon meetings for yourself , learn all u can about alcoholism and how we have a part in it . You need support from people who understand exactly how u feel . We are enablers and until we stop doing for them what they should do for them selves nothing will change . We have to stay out of thier business , thier addiction is none of our business or thier recovery from it , she will do it her way .
