Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

mr5191 · mr5191

Third post on this board. Been riding the ups and downs of living with an alcoholic. Good days and bad days. My AW is going to AA meetings almost every night but still actively drinking. Kind of wonder why she even bothers on going. She openly admits she cannot control it. While at her meetings, sh...

Pushka · Pushka

LOL!! Boy did I get a reality check. I no longer have the luxury to feel sorry for myself. I did wake up today feeling like son of a gun, I want to have a temper tantrum and darn it I want MY way RIGHT NOW!!! HA HA .. I'll let you know how that's working for me .. LOL!! I'm going to wind up going over another log...

daisy31 · daisy31

I was being nosy the other day about our neighbors and my son told me "Mom, stay in your own hoola-hoop!" I so needed to hear those words from them. I like teaching them about this program for many ways.... keeping their momma in check works too! :D

Oksie · Oksie

I posted this on the ACOA board as I guess its more dealing with that side of things.... but I know many of you are ACOA but just dont go to that board.... so thought I would post here too. Would be great to hear some of the wise words of you guys over there though... theres only a few of us active on the site. Hi...

sirchef · sirchef

Well just a little note about this site. It has been a god send for so many of us. We have been truly blessed to have a venue to come and find help and comfort. Recently the chat room meetings have been experiencing a leadership vacuum. Never enough chairs, dwindling attendance because of a lack of consis...

RR · RR

On March 4th I entered this community. Just to review, I have been in a relationship with my husband for 3 1/2 years and married for almost a year. He has been an alcholic for most of his life. I have been tolerated this since we met. At first we drank together. I truly didn't know he had such a deep problem. L...

AlexisK · AlexisK

Where do I start? I feel so stupid, and naive, for believing that my husband was actually keeping his promise, that he had stopped drinking. He doesn't get fall down drunk, not at first. He begins slowly, sneaking (always sneaking, never in front of me or anybody else) a few beers- admittedly behin...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

I attended an anniversary meeting for the first time last night (not sure if these are common at all Al Anon groups?). We had 3 speakers, one from AA, one from Alateen, and one from Al Anon. It was a great meeting and really rejuvinated me. The AA speaker talked about how being drunk made her feel alive and...

Alea · Alea

I'm new here. There is one alcoholic and one recovered alcoholic in my mother's immediate family. I hardly have a story to tell about them because I totally and completely avoid them, and have since I was a little kid. But...it's like there's a second-hand effect. I ended up dating an alcoholic (4 year...

rehprof · rehprof

ex A shows up to pick up 15 year old. Mild alcohol smell..leftover from last night? scares me bc my 9 year old was with him yesterday Feeling guilty that I didn't breathalzye him before letting him take my 15 year old... he has no job, no money, offers not one dime for child support.... he tells me he got a gr...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

I have to laugh so I don't cry. I've been at my current career for 6 years, promoted twice. I guess because I'd have to admit I'm an enabler here. Since I'm a single mom and my ex provides zero financial support for my kids, I do what I have to for a paycheck and am actively looking outside for a new job. I di...

amills4294 · amills4294

I like the message and guidance this program offers. I believe many would benefit from it even if they don't have alcohol in their lives. My spouse and I are also in counseling and the format and philosophy is so very different than what we learn in this program to the point that I feel conflicted. She r...

surfgirl123 · surfgirl123

So, Ive been working my program and doing pretty well. I thought my ah was doing well too, until today. I left yesterday on a business trip. I get a text today from a woman I don't know explaining she went to school w my husband and that last night he sent her a text that only read "?", she says he pr...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

I saw a tax lawyer today and will see my tax advisor tomorrow. I'm so exhausted by the huge mess I am in due to my AH's business mess. I can't fix it- it's out of my hands. I didn't cause it, yet I might lose everything I have worked hard for. This is not right. The anger that is inside me right now is all consumin...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

Since I truly gave up my life to my HP and started to live in reality, I have noticed a coorelation. Each time I have made a conscious choice to accept life on life's terms, something wonderful opens up for me. You might recall from past posts that I have been struggling with losing my in-laws. It's real...

Pushka · Pushka

AND this time no flipping over backwards on logs .. geeze!! No great pithanies of healing, and no need to analyze what I'm doing or not doing. I couldn't get the stupid mower started now I'm thinking I want one of those push button starters. I've never started a mower like this before so that will wait...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

My life for the past 9 months has been in a word exhausting. I've been actively participating in Al-Anon for the past 5 months. I've learned, I've grown, I've most certainly appreciated this board and the program! A pattern had developed in my marriage. Something would come up about every 2 weeks and m...

daisy31 · daisy31

I saw this on FB this morning and I liked it so I thought I would share with ya'll. "I can find only three kinds of business in the universe: mine, yours and Gods. Much of our stress comes from mentally living out of our business. When I think, You need to get a job, I want you to be happy, you should be on t...

nyc018 · nyc018

There have been some posts on spouses/significant others who are sober, either working a program or not, and I thought Id chime in with my own issue. My AH and I separated last year after his drinking got out of control. After he, for lack of better term, lost his mind and got fired from his job, he entere...

Pushka · Pushka

I have to give myself an atta girl because I have just sorted through 2 years of paperwork on the inside of my house. I have cleared out 4 large totes as well as numerous plastic shopping bags (more than 9) of paperwork, garbage you name it. It has taken me 7 days or so to get through it all .. I just kept doing...

daisy31 · daisy31

Hey ya'll! I was wondering if getting overwhelmed easily was something that is common among people in the program. I remember my mother being EXTREMELY overwhelmed from things going on around her. She was very affected by alcohol in her growing up years but never really drank herself. Now bein...

daisy31 · daisy31

I was searching through old posts on this board and found this great interview someone posted awhile back. I thought I would post it again. It is really inspiring and it shows that ANYONE can be affected by this disease of alcoholism. I love how Ashley talks about recovery. http://www.bing.com...

respect · respect

My divorce will be final in a number of weeks. I have lived on my own since July. And most recently I've filed felony theft charges on my husband. I didn't want any of this. It still isn't what I want. But I felt they were the only choices I had left. Now I don't know what to do. He still has this idea that we can m...

pineapple · pineapple

My A has recently been on a non stop binge. Even with all of my alanon superpowers I admit that it was starting to get to me. The good news - a friend of ours is out of the country for a few months. I asked him if I could use his house while he is gone. He gave me the keys before he left. So I am currently enjoying hav...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I can only make a short post as it is almost time to go! I am doing so well that I am not going to complain: not once today! God is so good to me & I am so grateful! I am even back to putting exclamation points at the end of my sentences!!!!!! To those of you who don't know me, I have bipolar disorder & I am k...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Yep that is right, ME. The guy was a perfect gentleman, took me bowling and to a nice dinner. He opened doors for me and paid for everything and looks forward to taking me out again, if I would allow it he said. I am thinking I am going to like this dating thing. I didn't feel like I owed him anything of myself (...

Pris · Pris

My husband drank a lot when we first got together. I didn't like it and since his mother is definitely an alcoholic, I told him I was concerned he would become an alcoholic too. Before we were married, he cut back his drinking to a couple of beers or glasses of wine a night and he has mostly kept to that for th...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

I thought my in laws and I were close. They called me their daughter. I opened up to them about my own family, who I do not have a relationship with. I really bonded with the children in the family as well. 2 weeks separated and none of them acknowledged my birthday. Not even a note on my stupid Facebook...

stephaniej · stephaniej

"If the grass is greener on the other side, it's time to water your grass." EXACTLY what I needed to see today. Thank you, HP, for sending me the message I needed for my own serenity and emotional health.

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Hi all, my wife is in recovery and things are going pretty well. We relate better to each other then we did a year or two ago, as we have both learned a lot about how to navigate through challenging times as a result of both of our programs. That being said, we are in no way connected on the level we once were. T...

gojojo · gojojo

Anyone married to a recovering alcohlic who also suffers from Borderline Personality disorder...or any other personality disorder (Bi-polar, Narcissistic Personality Disorder..they are similar). My wife is 8 months sober and was diagnosed with BPD in Nov. She is quite a handful. We have 3...

Oksie · Oksie

Hi.... previously on Oksie..... As many of you may remember, I have been away with work. My husband came with me and the location was his old city where he lived for 21 years and was a massive pot addict. He came with me to see his kids primarily and to catch up with friends. This means... .catch up wtih p...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

One Day at a Time...The Next Right Thing...etc. 2 weeks ago, my AH and I agreed to divorce. In 3 weeks, I face becoming homeless and am currently unemployed. Tomorrow is my 34th birthday. The grief and enormity of my situation hit me like a million pounds to the face last night. I am at peace with the e...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

My AH came by my office today (just drove to the curb- I didn't want to have him come into my office now that we are separated) to drop off some documents that I need in order to fight my way out of the IRS mess he has created. I asked him if he had paid the rent on our house (he has an arrangement with the mortgage...

Hope999 · Hope999

My alcoholic husband gave up drinking about 8 years ago when it was my way or the highway for him. He stopped drinking cold turkey and without the support of a major group or program. At the time, I thought that was ok because we have two children (ages 6 and 8) and he is a good and loving father. I truly beli...

dianah · dianah

Hello, I am a stay at home homeschooler with five children at home. Last year my husband underwent a massive heart attack and major heart surgery. His father died from alcoholism and addiction struggles have peppered our entire marriage. The heart attack has, for lack of a better term, heighten...

debbiems · debbiems

My AS 22 yrs old drove the pickup down our mile and a half dirt road, it has snowed and the road is horrible, needless to say he wrecked it. My husband came unglued. I have never seen him so angry and our AS has done alot of things but i guess this was the topping on the cake. He told our son that he has 3 weeks to g...

WantBetterforAll · WantBetterforAll

Hello, My first time here. I know the answer, I really do. I have seen so many posts on different sites about this. The answer is: I need to leave him behind, and focus on myself and my healing. He is (like they are) wonderful, handsome, charming beyond belief, talented. I have always felt that we had a &q...

brit · brit

Where do I start....I have a 25 year old son. after 3 DUIs in only a couple of months I realized he was an alcoholic. Not that I am stupid...just NEVER saw him drink or drunk! He agreed to rehab, and spent a month in. Court is finished and he has lost his license for 7 years and on probation for 1 1/2 years with a...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

Hey everyone, so the calls started again tnite - this time they weren't as bad because from the beginning I said I didn't want to get into an argument because I knew he had been drinking. He didn't even try to defend himself and let me get off the phone without a hassel. I have been very good about setting bo...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Am I allowed to say that in my thread title? I really am struggling with my emotions towards my AH. I get irritated at everything he says. I am totally on edge and I wonder if I love him anymore. It tears me apart to say that and I don't want it to be the end of our marriage but I am really struggling with wher...

maire rua · maire rua

We had an appointment with a counsellor at a treatment centre today. Unfortunately the counsellor made it clear that if I could not stay for the screening he would not see my son. It is recommended on their website that a family member would be present, however, it was more than a recommendation today....

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I have asked a bit about this topic before but will try to be more specific. I am an AAer for years now and just started going to ACA and Alanon. thru the steps thoroughly but can't sleep at night. I am oftentimes awake at 2 and 3 am and am absolutely exhausted all the time, bags under my eyes, full of fear, can...

daisy31 · daisy31

I am having trouble figuring out how to be able to get into the chat rooms. I would like to be able to do meetings some and chat as well but I can't figure it out. Is there some steps (haha no pun intended ;) on how to do this? Thanks so much for your help.

Grace7 · Grace7

There seems to be a gap in meetings lately. Has anyone else noticed this? What is up? Is there a need for more moderators? If so, someone in the know...contact me. I have come here for Years with the exception of my down time treating and recovering from cancer. Am healthy now!:) In all ways. I us...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

So i logged into facebook and temptation got the best of me .. hate that .. i looked on my x's wall and he wrote to a girl asking her how she is, etc.. but i know him and i know he's trying to talk to her .. it's not paranoia .. it's a pattern after a breakup for him. As soon as i saw it, i felt sick .. i have recovery a...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Before I found MIP I had joined another online community for those who are involved with alcoholics or have dealt with alcoholism. Every once in a while I may post there, but I'm not as active there as I am here. Can I just say that this forum is the most loving and supportive forum I have ever been on? I p...

Pushka · Pushka

I don't know how many people are currently active in service work for alanon. I have to say this is one of the most rewarding aspects of the program for me. I gotta keep giving it away in order to keep it. We go to a treatment center for family night once a month and this is my first night to go to this partic...

jonidreamsingreen · jonidreamsingreen

Hi, just want to introduce myself. I am 33 years old. My mom has been an alcoholic for many years. It started as a way for her to cope with an emotionally abusive husband and has spiraled out of control. After thirty years of her being controlled by him, they finally got divorced. She lives with me and my tw...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I feel like it was a pretty big a-ha moment, that has been a long time coming. I've been sick since yesterday morning...sick as a dog in that food poisoning kind of way. Yuck. I went to work for awhile today and came home in the late morning to rest before picking up my little guy from day care (I'm home al...

Pushka · Pushka

All I can say is UGH UGH UGH!!! I'm really trying to accept God's Will and not impose what my will is because of the whole door #1 and door #2 deal .. what God has in door #2 is what I want. I know it's going to be so much better than what I think I want, because my little pea brain can't wrap my head around what tr...

Doozy · Doozy

Thank you for your wisdom, kind words and encouragement when I needed them last week. As you may know, I've been struggling with some new health problems, but I am feeling much better this week both physically and mentally. I sooo appreciate being able to come here to find kind, supportive people who u...

amills4294 · amills4294

I am really trying to work my program and try not to allow someone elses upset with me take me off track. The upset is their's to deal with. Logically I know that but logic is not persevering right now. I have a very difficult time being on the other end of someone elses upset with me. I need help to not al...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Gezz!!! is it closure that's got me, i dunno. But 7 months seperated and I miss him sooo much. Sold the house 3 weeks ago. He totaled the truck a week ago. The guy who killed his son pleaded guilty and was sentenced to 15 years just a few days ago. Lots of closure. OMG!!! i think i just got it!! for 7 mont...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Had a fine weekend...AH's birthday was on Sunday, and we had a nice day enjoying the gorgeous weather. My AH tried to get ugly with me, and DID get ugly with his dog last night, but I just refused to go there. That is getting soooo much easier for me. A year ago I would have taken the bait and the whole thin...

GeneralLee · GeneralLee

I really don't know where to begin. She (my wife) is passed out right now. Not sure if she passed out from booze or not. History: Post partum depression starting with our 4th child, born 7 months ago. Prior child she drank and breast fed daily. He has some slowed development in speech (he is 2 and is just...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

what makes me so mad too is that even if i am obssessing, the part in me that makes me so mad at myself is that noone and no amount of anything is worth giving away our power, dignity, or serenity .. it doesn't matter who or what it is and still i do it .. when i do this, i close the door to my possibilities of s...

orchidlover · orchidlover

the ex A who I have not been with for over 4 years now was someone who was really charming, sweet, kind and understanding. On his dark side he was mean, nasty, vindictive and controlling. What I have learned this week is that I had a pattern of seeking out the same as I knew as a child. My mother could be swee...

Tuesday · Tuesday

Need some help and advice. I have been married to the bipolar-alcoholic husband for 6 years. We separated (legally married but living separately) 2 years ago during his major meltdown. During the last couple of years he has been in 7 detoxes, 3 halfway houses, one inpatient treatment center(20 days...

rehprof · rehprof

Today's the day I officially end a 29 year marriage...another casuality of alcoholism. Please send ESH...as I have to testify...because I am the plaintiff in the divorce proceedings. My goal -- don't cry! and this too shall pass...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	accepting relationships in AA??? (Preview) Third post on this board. Been riding the ups and downs of living with an alcoholic. Good days and bad days. My AW is going to AA meetings almost every night but still actively drinking. Kind of wonder why she even bothers on going. She openly admits she cannot control it. While at her meetings, sh...	mr5191	10	708	Mar 26, 2012 by mr5191
	Feeling sorry for myself .. (Preview) LOL!! Boy did I get a reality check. I no longer have the luxury to feel sorry for myself. I did wake up today feeling like son of a gun, I want to have a temper tantrum and darn it I want MY way RIGHT NOW!!! HA HA .. I'll let you know how that's working for me .. LOL!! I'm going to wind up going over another log...	Pushka	10	633	Mar 26, 2012 by nyc018
	Something funny with my kiddos. (Preview) I was being nosy the other day about our neighbors and my son told me "Mom, stay in your own hoola-hoop!" I so needed to hear those words from them. I like teaching them about this program for many ways.... keeping their momma in check works too! :D	daisy31	5	396	Mar 26, 2012 by abbyal
	My daugter (Preview) I posted this on the ACOA board as I guess its more dealing with that side of things.... but I know many of you are ACOA but just dont go to that board.... so thought I would post here too. Would be great to hear some of the wise words of you guys over there though... theres only a few of us active on the site. Hi...	Oksie	13	659	Mar 26, 2012 by pineapple
	use it or lose it? (Preview) Well just a little note about this site. It has been a god send for so many of us. We have been truly blessed to have a venue to come and find help and comfort. Recently the chat room meetings have been experiencing a leadership vacuum. Never enough chairs, dwindling attendance because of a lack of consis...	sirchef	6	482	Mar 26, 2012 by wp
	I feel like a fool (Preview) On March 4th I entered this community. Just to review, I have been in a relationship with my husband for 3 1/2 years and married for almost a year. He has been an alcholic for most of his life. I have been tolerated this since we met. At first we drank together. I truly didn't know he had such a deep problem. L...	RR	11	645	Mar 26, 2012 by I am lost
	New to this... (Preview) Where do I start? I feel so stupid, and naive, for believing that my husband was actually keeping his promise, that he had stopped drinking. He doesn't get fall down drunk, not at first. He begins slowly, sneaking (always sneaking, never in front of me or anybody else) a few beers- admittedly behin...	AlexisK	6	523	Mar 26, 2012 by pinkchip
	Anniversary meeting (Preview) I attended an anniversary meeting for the first time last night (not sure if these are common at all Al Anon groups?). We had 3 speakers, one from AA, one from Alateen, and one from Al Anon. It was a great meeting and really rejuvinated me. The AA speaker talked about how being drunk made her feel alive and...	usedtobeanyer	5	365	Mar 25, 2012 by Jerry F
	I Have a Crazy Life Inside My Head (Preview) I'm new here. There is one alcoholic and one recovered alcoholic in my mother's immediate family. I hardly have a story to tell about them because I totally and completely avoid them, and have since I was a little kid. But...it's like there's a second-hand effect. I ended up dating an alcoholic (4 year...	Alea	5	609	Mar 25, 2012 by Jerry F
	Feeling all Zen...and then... (Preview) ex A shows up to pick up 15 year old. Mild alcohol smell..leftover from last night? scares me bc my 9 year old was with him yesterday Feeling guilty that I didn't breathalzye him before letting him take my 15 year old... he has no job, no money, offers not one dime for child support.... he tells me he got a gr...	rehprof	6	636	Mar 24, 2012 by Jerry F
	My Management Team at Work are Classic Alcoholic Behaviors (Preview) I have to laugh so I don't cry. I've been at my current career for 6 years, promoted twice. I guess because I'd have to admit I'm an enabler here. Since I'm a single mom and my ex provides zero financial support for my kids, I do what I have to for a paycheck and am actively looking outside for a new job. I di...	AStrongerMe	5	595	Mar 24, 2012 by Michelle814
	drained after counseling session - need some strength (Preview) I like the message and guidance this program offers. I believe many would benefit from it even if they don't have alcohol in their lives. My spouse and I are also in counseling and the format and philosophy is so very different than what we learn in this program to the point that I feel conflicted. She r...	amills4294	7	701	Mar 24, 2012 by orchidlover
	Why now! (Preview) So, Ive been working my program and doing pretty well. I thought my ah was doing well too, until today. I left yesterday on a business trip. I get a text today from a woman I don't know explaining she went to school w my husband and that last night he sent her a text that only read "?", she says he pr...	surfgirl123	6	595	Mar 24, 2012 by orchidlover
	So Exhausted by All of This (Preview) I saw a tax lawyer today and will see my tax advisor tomorrow. I'm so exhausted by the huge mess I am in due to my AH's business mess. I can't fix it- it's out of my hands. I didn't cause it, yet I might lose everything I have worked hard for. This is not right. The anger that is inside me right now is all consumin...	Green Eyes	6	627	Mar 24, 2012 by Green Eyes
	Radical Acceptance (Preview) Since I truly gave up my life to my HP and started to live in reality, I have noticed a coorelation. Each time I have made a conscious choice to accept life on life's terms, something wonderful opens up for me. You might recall from past posts that I have been struggling with losing my in-laws. It's real...	Dolly Llama	8	695	Mar 24, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Burning again .. LOL! (Preview) AND this time no flipping over backwards on logs .. geeze!! No great pithanies of healing, and no need to analyze what I'm doing or not doing. I couldn't get the stupid mower started now I'm thinking I want one of those push button starters. I've never started a mower like this before so that will wait...	Pushka	10	585	Mar 24, 2012 by Pushka
	Working My Program (Preview) My life for the past 9 months has been in a word exhausting. I've been actively participating in Al-Anon for the past 5 months. I've learned, I've grown, I've most certainly appreciated this board and the program! A pattern had developed in my marriage. Something would come up about every 2 weeks and m...	Jackie11	6	431	Mar 24, 2012 by Michelle814
	just a quick little share. (Preview) I saw this on FB this morning and I liked it so I thought I would share with ya'll. "I can find only three kinds of business in the universe: mine, yours and Gods. Much of our stress comes from mentally living out of our business. When I think, You need to get a job, I want you to be happy, you should be on t...	daisy31	5	366	Mar 24, 2012 by Michelle814
	More on "Recovering" Spouses (Preview) There have been some posts on spouses/significant others who are sober, either working a program or not, and I thought Id chime in with my own issue. My AH and I separated last year after his drinking got out of control. After he, for lack of better term, lost his mind and got fired from his job, he entere...	nyc018	7	623	Mar 24, 2012 by Michelle814
	More changes .. (Preview) I have to give myself an atta girl because I have just sorted through 2 years of paperwork on the inside of my house. I have cleared out 4 large totes as well as numerous plastic shopping bags (more than 9) of paperwork, garbage you name it. It has taken me 7 days or so to get through it all .. I just kept doing...	Pushka	10	433	Mar 24, 2012 by Pushka
	Do you ever get overwhelmed? (Preview) Hey ya'll! I was wondering if getting overwhelmed easily was something that is common among people in the program. I remember my mother being EXTREMELY overwhelmed from things going on around her. She was very affected by alcohol in her growing up years but never really drank herself. Now bein...	daisy31	7	717	Mar 24, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Interview w/ Ashley Judd talking recovery (Preview) I was searching through old posts on this board and found this great interview someone posted awhile back. I thought I would post it again. It is really inspiring and it shows that ANYONE can be affected by this disease of alcoholism. I love how Ashley talks about recovery. http://www.bing.com...	daisy31	2	4811	Mar 24, 2012 by John
	When...how to move on (Preview) My divorce will be final in a number of weeks. I have lived on my own since July. And most recently I've filed felony theft charges on my husband. I didn't want any of this. It still isn't what I want. But I felt they were the only choices I had left. Now I don't know what to do. He still has this idea that we can m...	respect	6	575	Mar 24, 2012 by Jerry F
	taking a break (Preview) My A has recently been on a non stop binge. Even with all of my alanon superpowers I admit that it was starting to get to me. The good news - a friend of ours is out of the country for a few months. I asked him if I could use his house while he is gone. He gave me the keys before he left. So I am currently enjoying hav...	pineapple	9	494	Mar 24, 2012 by Breakingfree
	real quick: it is almost time to go! (Preview) I can only make a short post as it is almost time to go! I am doing so well that I am not going to complain: not once today! God is so good to me & I am so grateful! I am even back to putting exclamation points at the end of my sentences!!!!!! *To those of you who don't know me, I have bipolar disorder & I am k...*	Hoot Nanny	1	338	Mar 24, 2012 by hotrod
	Guess who went on a date last weekend? (Preview) Yep that is right, ME. The guy was a perfect gentleman, took me bowling and to a nice dinner. He opened doors for me and paid for everything and looks forward to taking me out again, if I would allow it he said. I am thinking I am going to like this dating thing. I didn't feel like I owed him anything of myself (...	Breakingfree	7	439	Mar 24, 2012 by bud
	I think my husband is an alcoholic but I'm not sure (Preview) My husband drank a lot when we first got together. I didn't like it and since his mother is definitely an alcoholic, I told him I was concerned he would become an alcoholic too. Before we were married, he cut back his drinking to a couple of beers or glasses of wine a night and he has mostly kept to that for th...	Pris	5	2292	Mar 24, 2012 by kael1539
	Quick share- shut out by in laws (Preview) I thought my in laws and I were close. They called me their daughter. I opened up to them about my own family, who I do not have a relationship with. I really bonded with the children in the family as well. 2 weeks separated and none of them acknowledged my birthday. Not even a note on my stupid Facebook...	Dolly Llama	4	634	Mar 23, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Nice little gem on a magnet I saw today... (Preview) "If the grass is greener on the other side, it's time to water your grass." EXACTLY what I needed to see today. Thank you, HP, for sending me the message I needed for my own serenity and emotional health.	stephaniej	9	432	Mar 23, 2012 by pineapple
	Re-connecting with recovering spouse (Preview) Hi all, my wife is in recovery and things are going pretty well. We relate better to each other then we did a year or two ago, as we have both learned a lot about how to navigate through challenging times as a result of both of our programs. That being said, we are in no way connected on the level we once were. T...	usedtobeanyer	9	477	Mar 23, 2012 by sookie
	Wife...recovering alcoholic and BPD (Preview) Anyone married to a recovering alcohlic who also suffers from Borderline Personality disorder...or any other personality disorder (Bi-polar, Narcissistic Personality Disorder..they are similar). My wife is 8 months sober and was diagnosed with BPD in Nov. She is quite a handful. We have 3...	gojojo	7	2333	Mar 23, 2012 by Oksie
	home again (Preview) Hi.... previously on Oksie..... As many of you may remember, I have been away with work. My husband came with me and the location was his old city where he lived for 21 years and was a massive pot addict. He came with me to see his kids primarily and to catch up with friends. This means... .catch up wtih p...	Oksie	3	421	Mar 22, 2012 by Oksie
	Struggling with one day at a time/divorce (Preview) One Day at a Time...The Next Right Thing...etc. 2 weeks ago, my AH and I agreed to divorce. In 3 weeks, I face becoming homeless and am currently unemployed. Tomorrow is my 34th birthday. The grief and enormity of my situation hit me like a million pounds to the face last night. I am at peace with the e...	Dolly Llama	12	731	Mar 23, 2012 by orchidlover
	The Slow Death of a Marriage (Preview) My AH came by my office today (just drove to the curb- I didn't want to have him come into my office now that we are separated) to drop off some documents that I need in order to fight my way out of the IRS mess he has created. I asked him if he had paid the rent on our house (he has an arrangement with the mortgage...	Green Eyes	10	799	Mar 22, 2012 by respect
	I need help getting back my life...How to live with a dry angry drunk??? (Preview) My alcoholic husband gave up drinking about 8 years ago when it was my way or the highway for him. He stopped drinking cold turkey and without the support of a major group or program. At the time, I thought that was ok because we have two children (ages 6 and 8) and he is a good and loving father. I truly beli...	Hope999	20	742	Mar 22, 2012 by Hope999
	Unsure of what to do...newbie (Preview) Hello, I am a stay at home homeschooler with five children at home. Last year my husband underwent a massive heart attack and major heart surgery. His father died from alcoholism and addiction struggles have peppered our entire marriage. The heart attack has, for lack of a better term, heighten...	dianah	6	516	Mar 22, 2012 by abbyal
	Highly freaked out (Preview) My AS 22 yrs old drove the pickup down our mile and a half dirt road, it has snowed and the road is horrible, needless to say he wrecked it. My husband came unglued. I have never seen him so angry and our AS has done alot of things but i guess this was the topping on the cake. He told our son that he has 3 weeks to g...	debbiems	3	412	Mar 22, 2012 by orchidlover
	Not sure if I am in the right place, but I will just start about my ABF (Preview) Hello, My first time here. I know the answer, I really do. I have seen so many posts on different sites about this. The answer is: I need to leave him behind, and focus on myself and my healing. He is (like they are) wonderful, handsome, charming beyond belief, talented. I have always felt that we had a &q...	WantBetterforAll	8	428	Mar 22, 2012 by orchidlover
	Need help PLEASE (Preview) Where do I start....I have a 25 year old son. after 3 DUIs in only a couple of months I realized he was an alcoholic. Not that I am stupid...just NEVER saw him drink or drunk! He agreed to rehab, and spent a month in. Court is finished and he has lost his license for 7 years and on probation for 1 1/2 years with a...	brit	8	509	Mar 22, 2012 by orchidlover
	Saying what I mean without being mean, but feeling mean (Preview) Hey everyone, so the calls started again tnite - this time they weren't as bad because from the beginning I said I didn't want to get into an argument because I knew he had been drinking. He didn't even try to defend himself and let me get off the phone without a hassel. I have been very good about setting bo...	Corgi2	8	552	Mar 22, 2012 by Corgi2
	Feel like crap (Preview) Am I allowed to say that in my thread title? I really am struggling with my emotions towards my AH. I get irritated at everything he says. I am totally on edge and I wonder if I love him anymore. It tears me apart to say that and I don't want it to be the end of our marriage but I am really struggling with wher...	ilovedogs	5	632	Mar 22, 2012 by pinkchip
	Help with experience of treatment centres (Preview) We had an appointment with a counsellor at a treatment centre today. Unfortunately the counsellor made it clear that if I could not stay for the screening he would not see my son. It is recommended on their website that a family member would be present, however, it was more than a recommendation today....	maire rua	4	380	Mar 22, 2012 by pinkchip
	Exhaustion due to Family Abuse (Preview) I have asked a bit about this topic before but will try to be more specific. I am an AAer for years now and just started going to ACA and Alanon. thru the steps thoroughly but can't sleep at night. I am oftentimes awake at 2 and 3 am and am absolutely exhausted all the time, bags under my eyes, full of fear, can...	WorkingThroughIt	14	671	Mar 22, 2012 by WorkingThroughIt
	How do I get connected to the MiRC chat thing? (Preview) I am having trouble figuring out how to be able to get into the chat rooms. I would like to be able to do meetings some and chat as well but I can't figure it out. Is there some steps (haha no pun intended ;) on how to do this? Thanks so much for your help.	daisy31	4	414	Mar 22, 2012 by lacewing
	Meetings (Preview) There seems to be a gap in meetings lately. Has anyone else noticed this? What is up? Is there a need for more moderators? If so, someone in the know...contact me. I have come here for Years with the exception of my down time treating and recovering from cancer. Am healthy now!:) In all ways. I us...	Grace7	1	334	Mar 22, 2012 by lacewing
	feeling sick (temporary) (Preview) So i logged into facebook and temptation got the best of me .. hate that .. i looked on my x's wall and he wrote to a girl asking her how she is, etc.. but i know him and i know he's trying to talk to her .. it's not paranoia .. it's a pattern after a breakup for him. As soon as i saw it, i felt sick .. i have recovery a...	MeTwo2	1	346	Mar 22, 2012 by hotrod
	Comparing MIP to other forums (Preview) Before I found MIP I had joined another online community for those who are involved with alcoholics or have dealt with alcoholism. Every once in a while I may post there, but I'm not as active there as I am here. Can I just say that this forum is the most loving and supportive forum I have ever been on? I p...	ilovedogs	5	523	Mar 22, 2012 by hotrod
	Service work (Preview) I don't know how many people are currently active in service work for alanon. I have to say this is one of the most rewarding aspects of the program for me. I gotta keep giving it away in order to keep it. We go to a treatment center for family night once a month and this is my first night to go to this partic...	Pushka	3	620	Mar 22, 2012 by Pushka
	Adult Child of an Alcoholic Parent (Preview) Hi, just want to introduce myself. I am 33 years old. My mom has been an alcoholic for many years. It started as a way for her to cope with an emotionally abusive husband and has spiraled out of control. After thirty years of her being controlled by him, they finally got divorced. She lives with me and my tw...	jonidreamsingreen	4	504	Mar 22, 2012 by orchidlover
	Learned something else about myself today (Preview) I feel like it was a pretty big a-ha moment, that has been a long time coming. I've been sick since yesterday morning...sick as a dog in that food poisoning kind of way. Yuck. I went to work for awhile today and came home in the late morning to rest before picking up my little guy from day care (I'm home al...	stephaniej	3	507	Mar 21, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Acceptance vs self will (Preview) All I can say is UGH UGH UGH!!! I'm really trying to accept God's Will and not impose what my will is because of the whole door #1 and door #2 deal .. what God has in door #2 is what I want. I know it's going to be so much better than what I think I want, because my little pea brain can't wrap my head around what tr...	Pushka	7	928	Mar 21, 2012 by stephaniej
	Thank you! (Preview) Thank you for your wisdom, kind words and encouragement when I needed them last week. As you may know, I've been struggling with some new health problems, but I am feeling much better this week both physically and mentally. I sooo appreciate being able to come here to find kind, supportive people who u...	Doozy	3	509	Mar 21, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Having a rough day - being challenged by my recovery (Preview) I am really trying to work my program and try not to allow someone elses upset with me take me off track. The upset is their's to deal with. Logically I know that but logic is not persevering right now. I have a very difficult time being on the other end of someone elses upset with me. I need help to not al...	amills4294	3	359	Mar 20, 2012 by amills4294
	7 months seperate from my Active Alcholic Addict Husband, Miss Him So Much (Preview) Gezz!!! is it closure that's got me, i dunno. But 7 months seperated and I miss him sooo much. Sold the house 3 weeks ago. He totaled the truck a week ago. The guy who killed his son pleaded guilty and was sentenced to 15 years just a few days ago. Lots of closure. OMG!!! i think i just got it!! for 7 mont...	Sincerely	7	503	Mar 20, 2012 by amills4294
	Hanging on to my serenity for dear life (Preview) Had a fine weekend...AH's birthday was on Sunday, and we had a nice day enjoying the gorgeous weather. My AH tried to get ugly with me, and DID get ugly with his dog last night, but I just refused to go there. That is getting soooo much easier for me. A year ago I would have taken the bait and the whole thin...	stephaniej	7	564	Mar 20, 2012 by amills4294
	Hi. (Preview) I really don't know where to begin. She (my wife) is passed out right now. Not sure if she passed out from booze or not. History: Post partum depression starting with our 4th child, born 7 months ago. Prior child she drank and breast fed daily. He has some slowed development in speech (he is 2 and is just...	GeneralLee	15	873	Mar 20, 2012 by GeneralLee
	what makes me so mad / obssession (Preview) what makes me so mad too is that even if i am obssessing, the part in me that makes me so mad at myself is that noone and no amount of anything is worth giving away our power, dignity, or serenity .. it doesn't matter who or what it is and still i do it .. when i do this, i close the door to my possibilities of s...	MeTwo2	10	664	Mar 20, 2012 by MeTwo2
	Seeing patterns (Preview) the ex A who I have not been with for over 4 years now was someone who was really charming, sweet, kind and understanding. On his dark side he was mean, nasty, vindictive and controlling. What I have learned this week is that I had a pattern of seeking out the same as I knew as a child. My mother could be swee...	orchidlover	5	741	Mar 20, 2012 by MeTwo2
	how to commit bipolar alcoholic into a treatment? (Preview) Need some help and advice. I have been married to the bipolar-alcoholic husband for 6 years. We separated (legally married but living separately) 2 years ago during his major meltdown. During the last couple of years he has been in 7 detoxes, 3 halfway houses, one inpatient treatment center(20 days...	Tuesday	7	3897	Mar 20, 2012 by Tuesday
	Off to court.... (Preview) Today's the day I officially end a 29 year marriage...another casuality of alcoholism. Please send ESH...as I have to testify...because I am the plaintiff in the divorce proceedings. My goal -- don't cry! and this too shall pass...	rehprof	14	636	Mar 20, 2012 by Doozy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.